Original subtitles

[all chanting] Do it. Do it. Do it.

Guys, I don't even put butter on my bread.

-[all laughing] -[Zoë] Ew...

-[Tristan] Truth or dare, Zoë. -Dare.

[All] One, two, three, four, five.

Oh, God, it smells like a small animal drowned in your junk sweat.

[sighs] Okay, payback time, Miles. Truth or dare?

It's time for some truth up in here.

I know. How many people have you been with?

Come on, we all know it's the highest body count here.

Yeah, well, that depends what we're counting.

-[Zoë] Only the full "it" it. -Come on, quit stalling.

Truth, it's, um... it's five.

Really? New additions. Okay, okay, let me guess.

Uh, Esme and... Tristan?

Or did you finally hook up with that Swedish exchange student?

Actually, um, it was Zoë. Last summer.

-You all wanted the truth. -At least we used protection.

Why? What are your numbers? Well, we know Winston's a zero.

Hey! Some of us aren't just looking to score a quick thrill and move on.

Some of us are looking to fall in love.

Tris?

This game is childish.

-[Winston] What's up his butt? -I have no idea.

[theme music playing]

♪ Whatever it takes I know I can make it through ♪

♪ And if I hold out I know I can make it through ♪

♪ Be the best, be the best The best that I can be ♪

♪ Whatever it takes ♪

♪ I know I can make it I know I can make it through ♪

-Happy birthday. -It's not my birthday.

I know, but for some crazy reason,

they don't have congratulations- for-getting-into-science-camp cupcakes.

Maybe they're in the back. [laughs]

Thanks, guys, but I'm still not sure if I can go, though.

Tuition's covered, but I gotta pay for the flights.

I'm sure you'll find the money and be off to Cali soon enough.

So, we better enjoy our time

as three single dudes on the prowl while we still can, huh?

-Uh, sorry, single "persons." -We're not in the same category.

And how single can you be when you're still pining over someone?

Hey, I haven't thought about Maya since...

-at least lunch. -[scoffs]

And this guy has two girls who like him, not zero.

[scoffs] I gotta get home. Enjoy the... prowl. [snickers]

Hey.

I saw your little spin. You dance?

Uh... yeah, I've been known to get down.

Are you looking for work?

As a dancer? Because I dance, too.

Bring your best moves.

-Dude... she's asking me. -Dude, I need the money.

And besides, you can't be mad at me.

It's my birthday. [chuckles]

[sighing]

So, you're "back" back? No more running away with your girlfriend?

Yeah. I'm pretty sure her mom's gonna sic the dogs on me

if I come near their place.

-As if that could stop you two. -Yeah, well, Frankie's trying to be good,

which means she's got less time for me, and I got more time for you.

Well, good, because I'm serious about recording this album

while I still have my sweet co-op.

I'm gonna try to score us a management deal.

Oh, yeah! Makin' it rain. Makin' it rain.

Whoo! [laughs]

It's the royalties from my videos.

[giggles]

Five dollars and 42 cents.

Yeah, usually, I only get, like, three-something...

which means I probably got, like, 10,000 new views.

Except for... none of my play counts really went up that much.

Well, maybe they aren't your views. Look.

[dance music playing]

♪ If you want me to get close to you I will ♪

♪ Yes, I will Yes, I will ♪

-[scoffs] -So the extra two bucks is from that?

Yeah, I... I wrote the song, so I get the royalties.

-Okay, that's great. -No, it isn't. He stole my song.

-No, actually, he paid for your song. -Yeah, well, it wasn't for sale.

[whispering] I don't get it.

Well, you draw the radius in the small circle

to the point of tangency so it's at a right angle with the chord.

That's not what I'm talking about.

If you get that, then you just plug in the Pythagorean theorem and then--

I don't get why Tristan is mad at me.

Well, he's obviously uncomfortable with your number.

-Why? Because I've had a little sex? -Well, it's a big deal to some people.

Aw, are you uncomfortable that Zoë's more experienced than you?

Kind of, but I'm sure when we feel strongly about each other,

we'll... seal the deal.

God, everyone makes it so complicated. If you wanna do it, just nut up and do it.

See, this is why Tristan's mad.

Because you make it seem like if you haven't had sex,

you're some kind of loser.

[Winston sighs]

Tristan's a virgin.

[whispering] Shh! Zoë told me that in secret.

Great, I know how to fix it. I'll just have sex with him.

It's that easy, huh?

If that were the solution to any of these problems, I'd be acing math.

Even though it's a whole different kind of geometry?

We're two teenage boys who like each other.

I don't think it'll be that hard to figure out.

[Baaz] Okay, so what's your next move?

I am going to summon my Bone to Ash.

Good. Uh, make sure you turn four of your lands

-because it costs four mana points. -Okay.

Hi. Vijay, right?

Oh, my God, Maya Matlin. Hi.

I know we have a weird history,

but I just wanna say that I love your music.

I saw that. And I need you to take down the video of you singing it.

I can't. My subscribers love it.

All business dealings with Mr. Maraj should go through me.

Baaz Nahir, his manager.

[sighs] Listen, it's my song, so just take it down.

He's under no obligation to do so.

It's a cover, which he noted on his page, crediting you everywhere.

I do Beyoncé, Nicki, Adele. You're in good company.

Well, I'm about to record that song for an album,

and I can't really have your weird version out there confusing people.

Excuse me? Weird?

Yeah, it's supposed to be a romantic ballad.

-You made it all... clubby. -Maybe yours is the weird version.

[scoffs]

Baaz!

I don't want to hurt it, but I need you to delete that song.

I... I have no bargaining power here.

Okay, fine. I'll figure out a way to save face with my fans.

I knew you'd understand.

Wait. If you're interested in representation, call me.

[sighs]

[crowd cheering]

[girl] Oh, yeah!

All right, cool, but I think I got you beat.

-[exhales] -Oh, okay.

You can't see me. You can't see me.

Okay, I dig it. I dig it.

But if it was down to you and me...

[crowd cheering]

[crowd chanting]

[boy] You got it! Whoo!

He's right. He's totally got you.

Like you're some expert.

Twelve years of dance training gives me a little cred, yeah.

-Ooh. -I'm around if you need lessons.

Well, thank you, but I think this guy should be taking lessons from me.

Yeah. Maybe tomorrow, man. [scoffs]

Good luck.

-Wait, I... I do need your help. -I thought I wasn't an expert.

Okay, fine, you're an expert in all things dance.

And?

And I would be lucky if you taught me even one move.

Please.

I need this job.

[sighs] Okay... but on one condition.

You be ready to work. Hard.

Couldn't you have just brought your math assignment

down to me at the door?

Then I couldn't give it to you in my own special way.

[cell phone vibrating]

Ignore it.

I have to tell my dad where I am. I promised I'd be home in 20 minutes.

[Miles] This won't take that long.

-Whoa, what are you doing? -I think you know.

Right now?

You're obviously weirded out that I've done more than you, so...

-let's fix that. -Wait.

Are you saying there's something wrong with me 'cause I haven't had sex?

No, I'm saying it's no big deal.

Yeah, maybe for a manwhore.

Miles, do you have my charger?

Oh, geez!

Don't worry. He's, uh, fully charged.

Tristan, wait.

[somber pop music playing]

[music stops]

Your arms need to be stronger. Go again.

-[exhales sharply] -[music starts playing]

[music stops]

Strong arms! Go again.

[sighs] Why? Why, so you can tell me that I'm doing it wrong again?

Geez, who hurt you?

No one! Okay? It's me. I can't do anything.

Tiny's got his science thing. Grace has her computery stuff.

I can't even handle the job of boyfriend.

-Seriously? -Yes, seriously!

Maya dumped me, and she was probably right to

because I'm terrible at pretty much everything.

I meant, "Seriously, are we talking about some other girl right now?"

Dance is about confidence, fighting the doubt.

So forget about her and fight it. Do you think you can do that?

Yeah.

Okay. Let's go again.

I need that magazine.

I'm in the middle of a very important profile on Brody Jenner.

Well, I gotta return it to Tristan, so...

-You guys should get to school. -I'm gearing up.

I made it through yesterday. I think today will be easier.

Good. And straight home afterward.

Hunter's out of the hospital today, and I'm throwing a thing for him.

Like a getting-out-of-the-psych-ward party?

-Is that appropriate? -A get-together. I'm proud of him.

I even invited Tristan. He friended me on FaceRange. Isn't that adorable?

Yeah.

Or do you want me to uninvite him?

-Nah, I got to talk to him, anyway. -[Mrs. Hollingsworth] Okay.

Are you breaking up with Tristan because of... yesterday?

When he rejected me sexually?

-La-la-la-la-la-la-la. -[chuckles]

Doesn't matter. It's over, anyway.

Because he wouldn't sleep with you? Isn't that a little harsh?

Not "wouldn't." He doesn't want to.

Tristan likes you. A lot.

Yeah, I know. I like him, too.

No matter what I do, he's always been

the one person who treats me like... I'm normal.

Until he heard my number.

Okay, so why don't you just talk to him?

No, if he doesn't want to do it, he's already spoken, loud and clear.

Once we settle on keys and tempos, then Jonah will do the guitar tracks

for "Not Okay," "Yes" and a few other new ones.

We're doing "Yes"?

Yeah, I know it's about Zig, but honestly, I'm over that,

and seeing that kid do it made me realize what a good song it was.

I kind of feel bad for being so harsh with him.

Don't feel too bad. Look.

Many of you asked where my cover of "Yes" went,

so I feel I must address this.

Maya Matlin demanded I take it down.

She called it weird and basically said if you're different,

her songs are not for you.

Well, I have to respond, right?

And start a flame war? He has four times as many subscribers as you.

So there's nothing I can do?

Guys, I'm trying to actually take music seriously.

And he's just some kid with an iPhone camera and a mic,

pretending he's Bruno Mars.

Okay, well, how would you convince Bruno Mars to take this down?

[somber pop music playing]

I got your mom's e-vite.

Yeah, she went rogue.

You don't have to come. You obviously don't want to.

So, you're not apologizing?

You're the one who called me a manwhore, remember?

Yeah, is there another name for someone who humps anything that moves?

Hey, I can't un-have sex with those girls.

If you can't handle my past, then--

Sorry if I don't want to be just another conquest

on your exotic list of hookups.

If you're so uncomfortable with me being more experienced than you,

then why don't you go sleep with a couple guys

and then come back to me?

-I don't care. -[school bell ringing]

Wait. Come back to you?

Yeah. I want to be with you.

You're the one that freaked out and ran as soon as you heard my number.

Miles, I don't care about your list.

I just... [sighs]

I wanna feel like I matter more than anyone else on there.

[sighing]

-You should come tonight. -Because you feel bad?

Because I want you to.

[somber pop music playing]

[music stops]

-[panting] -That was... really something.

Thanks, I, uh... I worked really hard on it.

It shows. Now, can you dance to hip-hop, top 40 stuff, too?

Most of our bookings are a little bit more mainstream.

-Uh, yeah, sure. I can do anything. -[woman] Okay. And you're 18?

Uh, yeah.

Great, take off your clothes. Show us what you got.

I'm sorry?

Strip down.

Uh, I'm not wearing any underwear.

That's okay. We're not shy.

Okay, okay. Um...

What is this? So you could, like... see if I have a dancer's physique or...

We want to get a look at the goods. We're selling an experience, here.

Uh, okay... yeah, okay.

Uh, are there, like, tight costumes or anything?

For the bachelorette parties, it's usually a fireman or a cop.

Oh, crap.

Oh, crap.

[stammers] Uh, just so we're clear.

Um, when you said "dancer," you meant "stripper,"

-right? -Was that not clear?

Oh, crap. [sighs]

[door opening]

♪ There's me Looking down at my shoes... ♪

A-ha, caught ya.

Easy, easy. Just making sure you got the levels set for the reggae session.

Oh, yeah. I got a boost on the kick, and the bass is jacked.

I also wanted to return this.

I know you switched your shifts to avoid me.

Hey, are my songs good?

Yeah, they're amazing. Seriously.

So then why does this kid have, like, way more followers than me?

He can't sing as well, and all he does is covers.

♪ And not everything Is supposed to come true... ♪

He's so unique and full of joy.

-Don't you just want to watch him? -No, I want people to wanna watch me.

[chuckles] Jealousy is not a good look on you.

Neither is fury.

Look... you're doing all the right stuff.

You've got a voice and a vision.

You really think so?

You'll get signed... eventually.

And if he sticks to doing covers, he never will.

But Carly Rae Jepsen was on Canadian Idol,

and then she kind of disappeared for a while,

until bam, "Call Me Maybe."

Now she's super famous.

So... you're saying he could be more successful than me?

Only if he finds his voice and picks the right song.

So you gotta play nice with everyone. That's why I returned your shoe.

[laughs]

[chuckles] How come you're nervous?

I'm the one who hasn't seen my friends in weeks.

Your guests have arrived. Hi. Come on.

I know Hunter didn't want me to say anything,

but I am proud of you, and thank you for coming.

-Come on. -[chuckles]

Hey.

Two months and all you've prepared to say is "hey"?

-[chuckles] No big speech? -Whoa, don't make him angry.

-Are we not doing that joke yet? -[under breath] Oh, God.

Hey.

Okay, so what do you guys want to do first? Food? Games?

Magic tournament?

-You're on. -Yeah.

[Mrs. Hollingsworth] I can't wait to see this.

[Hunter] I hope you guys are ready to lose.

Does everyone have to play?

I think I can get you out of it. [chuckles]

I'm sorry I sprung sex on you. I should've talked to you about it first.

[chuckles] You think?

So, like, let's talk.

You really a virgin?

I mean... [chuckles] I've done other stuff with people.

We've done other stuff.

-But don't you want to try-- -Yeah, I... I do. But...

Not with me or...

No, definitely with you.

-But... there's lots to think about. -I've got condoms.

[chuckles] It's not just that.

Do you think it hurts?

I think that depends on...

[chuckles nervously]

See, this is getting awkward. This is why we didn't talk about it.

Yeah, but aren't you glad we're talking now?

You know, the list of people that...

I've been in love with is a lot shorter.

I love you, too.

[speaking indistinctly]

Should we go upstairs and continue this conversation?

Won't they wonder what we're doing?

No, they'll think we're fighting. Just follow my lead and storm out.

-How dare you? -How dare you?

[Frankie] What was that about?

[chuckles]

-[cell phone beeps] -Miss Maya Matlin

still won't let me use my cover of her song...

but... she agreed to write a song with me

and even booked recording studio time for me to record it. For reals.

Anything you wanna say?

Um, just that I actually had a lot of fun writing this with you.

-Aw! -[laughs]

Okay, less talk, more rock.

-[upbeat pop music playing] -[sighs]

♪ You've got that sleeve tattoo That kind of attitude ♪

♪ You've got me out with you ♪

♪ But you still got a lot A lot to prove ♪

This is cool.

Well, after what you said, I figured I should help him out.

Better to have him on my side, right, sensei?

No, I mean the song. You really nailed his voice.

Oh, it's just something we whipped off in a couple of hours.

-Well, that's a skill, too. -[chuckles]

I think we're wasting your talents having you input the mix settings.

-I don't mind. -Yeah, but maybe I can get you in

on some songwriting sessions over the summer? Wouldn't that be better?

-Are you serious? -I'll see what I can do.

Just promise you won't forget me when you're, like, super famous, okay?

♪ My rules, my way ♪

♪ Your words won't take me all the way ♪

♪ You gotta show me, show me ♪

♪ Show, show me ♪

♪ Show ♪

Okay, bye.

You guys did it, didn't you?

[chuckles] You'd make a terrible detective.

So you went from almost broken up to relationship goals overnight?

-Tristan and I had a nice talk. -Ew.

That's actually kind of sweet.

Wait, I didn't hear anything in there about you two not having sex.

It's not polite to kiss and tell.

Hey, do you think maybe we could do some kissing and not telling?

[chuckles nervously]

What, is it my fake birthday today?

[both laughing]

-For your new career. -You told her?

How could I not? You went all the way naked for a job interview.

-You thought it was legit, too. -[Grace laughing]

[sighs]

I guess I better try this thing on then, right?

That's what you guys wanted, right? To see me in this thing?

-[Tiny] Um... -[stuttering] What? No, that's not--

Um, I don't think that meets the school's dress code.

[clears throat]

[laughs] How was the audition?

[smacks lips] Well, uh, it turns out it was to be a stripper.

Go ahead, laugh. I'm already used to it.

Actually, I'm disappointed. You worked hard.

-You're good. -I am?

I dance with a troupe. We do a few shows a month.

Um, it's not much money, but it's kind of a summer job.

You want me to dance with you?

If you want. You don't even have to get naked... for the audition.

Well, at least someone likes my dancing.

-[Zig laughing] -[Tiny] Ew!

Stop.

[laughs]

[pop music playing]