Original subtitles

This don't get no better than this, does it, Luke?

You said it, Chester.

I can't remember when the drainage smells sweeter.

There ain't nothing like fishing to take a man's mind off the trials,

the tribulations, and the hustle and the bustles of the workaday world.

Yeah, you said it, Chester.

You can just sell so many donuts and flutters

and then you've got to give the mind a rest.

You said it, Chester.

Fishing has a way of making the man relax.

I'll drink to that.

Get me another beer.

Here, fishy, fishy, fishy.

It looks like them carp is running tonight.

Okay, it's good for a fella to get out of doors.

Too many people take weather and nature for granted.

I'll drink to that.

Hey, y'all been with us more like we can.

We was out here pumping that butane in them little rabbit holes.

All right, boys.

Ready to pack it in.

Now you be good and don't go out of the yard.

Promise?

Look out for the boogeyman.

Good night.

Good night.

Good night.

Mom and Dad said not to go out of the yard.

Yeah, I know.

E.T.

Hey,

what's going on?

What's wrong?

There's a space monster in the basement.

Space monster?

All right.

Honey, I don't mean to criticize but I think

I've been giving these boys too much sugar.

Maybe better take a look.

Is this the okra residence?

This is it.

Glad you could make it.

What seems to be the problem?

We don't know really.

Just some cockroaches in the basement.

No big deal.

Come on in.

No problem.

I hope you know this is immoral.

Honey, the man is a trained professional.

Cockroaches?

I think you have something to tell this gentleman before someone gets hurt.

Right.

Watch those steps down there.

It's pretty dark.

Oh, sure.

The space monster will rip your face off!

Timothy!

There's some kind of animal down there and my husband's going with you.

Aren't you, dear?

Sure, I'd just get in the man's way.

I hope there aren't any bugs down here.

They really give me the creeps.

How long have you been doing this?

Eleven years.

You see anything?

No.

How big is it exactly?

I don't know, really.

Well, I mean...

bigger than a red box?

Well, probably.

Really?

How much bigger than a red box?

I don't know.

Looks okay to me.

What?

I was living down here.

Are you sure?

Whatever was in here before is gone now.

Did you look behind the washing machine?

Not there.

What about the bar stool?

I

think we found something.

What about the exterminator?

I think he's got everything under control.

So long.

Your economics final is the day after tomorrow.

My assistants will hand out study guides, which I suggest

you look over carefully if you intend to pass this test.

I would like to conclude the semester with just a few words of advice.

I know this class is composed mostly of seniors, and most of you who pass the test

will be looking forward with great trepidation toward careers in the business world.

You are now asking yourselves, did I choose the right major?

Did I pick the right career choice?

As you embark upon your careers, remember one thing.

Business is not just making money.

Business is the key to this nation's future.

Business is the last real outlet for man's resourcefulness.

Business is the sole hope for mankind's evolutionary perseverance.

Business is garbage.

Business is the most horrible, awful, boring

waste of time I've ever come across in my life.

If you take that executive position, I think you could

be making the biggest mistake of your young life.

Business does have its drawbacks.

Max, don't make the same mistakes I did.

Try to remember that the only thing that separates man from the lower animals is his ability to

take stupid and pointless risks because he sees more to life than the options readily offered him.

It's his ability to get up and say, let's go for it.

You've got to learn to take risks if you want to get ahead in life, like King Lear.

So I should be more like King Lear?

Of course not.

King Lear was a drunken madman.

You're right.

Bad example.

But you know what I meant.

What

kind of outfit do you call that?

Your disguise does not fool me, Captain Starfighter.

You are the one who shot down my shin.

We have come to seek revenge and take what is rightfully ours.

We have journeyed far off your planet and will not leave until you have

returned the stolen radio transmissions and your brave princess Sabrina is dead.

Why are you dressed like that anyway?

Is that you in there, Lester?

You will tell me where you have hidden the secret transmissions or you shall die.

You must be in the wrong place.

I know exactly where I am.

And I know exactly who you are.

For the last time, where are the plans?

Huh?

The plans.

Where are the plans?

The plans are right here.

And the chocolate-covered ones are right over here.

No, no, no.

The plans.

I want the plans from the secret transmissions.

Hey, Ma, have we got any plans back there?

No.

How about a fritter?

How about a fritter?

What?

How about a fritter?

Seize the fritters.

Well, if you like them fritters, we've got some good jelly

donuts back there and they're just a buck fifty-nine will do us.

You all right?

That may be a little high.

Now tell me where the rebel fleet has hidden

the secret transmissions or you shall die.

Oh, okay.

They're just right down the street here.

Hey, there.

Can I help?

Ooh-wee.

Where'd you get that outfit?

We have come for the secret transmissions.

There is no use in denying it.

We know they are here.

Damn right.

We got transmissions every one of them.

Now, what kind of car you got?

Where is the princess?

Princess Serena, the leader of your rebel fleet.

All forces we have come to take her away.

I got you.

Karen!

Karen, get out here!

Some Martians here want to talk to you.

I think the big one there is Lester.

Well, I'm going to lunch.

It's nice to meet you.

And the coating machine's right over there.

So, Princess Serena, at last we meet.

It has been far, far too long.

Beg your pardon?

Do not be coy.

You have eluded me for the last time.

Yeah.

Well, clever me.

Do we know each other?

Do not insult my intelligence, dear one.

Tell me where you have hidden the transmissions that you

intercepted from Galactic Sector One or you shall die.

Well, we repaired transmissions, if that's what

you mean, but you got to speak to Roy about that.

I'm just the cashier.

Excuse me.

Very well.

If you wish to play games, so be it.

We shall see how well you hold up under the game of torture.

Get her!

Roy!

You will give me the plans to your rebel star base or you shall die.

Look, I don't even know what you're talking about.

But I think you should know, the local chamber of commerce takes a very dim

view of guys putting trash cans on their head and issuing death threats.

And just who do you think is going to save you, little one?

Excuse me, I was just... Bob!

Well, well, well, look who we have here.

I suppose you just happen to be in the neighborhood, eh?

If I'm disturbing anything, I can come back later.

So you've come to rescue the princess, have you?

Me?

Oh, no, not really.

Is this the best your planet has to offer?

You obviously underestimate my power.

Get him!

I am so tired of these mercenaries interfering with me.

I have wasted a long time for my vengeance.

Now, my dear friend, perhaps this will aid your memory.

What are you doing back there?

Oh, princess, why don't you just give the big guy here

what he wants and we'll just forget the whole thing.

What do you say, huh?

Oh, no transmissions, eh?

So you have hidden the plans in the droid.

I must say that is highly unoriginal.

Kill him.

Take the princess and the...

Don't shoot you like that, it's the droid.

Grab it.

What?

Grab it.

It's me.

You mean we just stole an automobile?

Well, technically.

Stop kicking my seat.

You're at my wrist, you know.

Why don't you punch him or something?

Me?

Oh, I would have.

I was too busy being electrocuted.

That's it.

Let's get out.

Well, then he lifted me up by my neck.

Right there in my own bakery.

Call me Captain Starbuster or somebody.

Yeah, we carried that.

Now, get back to the swamp.

Well, then this big blind sauce thing just come out of nowhere just like on the TV.

And it pointed this bright line at me and Chester

and started making these strange noises going...

You gonna look at them?

Oh, yeah, chief.

They look like big bug-eyed monster marshes.

Real terrible runny noses, just real ugly.

Ain't that right?

Yeah, sure, real ugly.

How about it, Willie?

You telling the truth?

Yeah, sure.

You never know for sure unless you've witnessed one yourself.

How many did you see, boys?

Well, about two... Thirty-three.

Oh, two or thirty-three.

Somewhere in there.

Well, they kept yelling swear words about the

earth and America and country music and stuff.

Country music?

That doesn't surprise me in the least.

Who are you?

Me?

I'm William Hopper.

I'm the director of the Bureau for Research of Astral Phenomena.

Then this big hairy spider monster thing, he come out carrying

this great old big space bomb and he blowed up my damn truck.

Wait a minute.

Your truck's outside.

I saw it.

We had it fixed.

Are you sure you know how to operate this thing?

Of course.

And then the big bug-eyed one came in and said to me, he said, if

you don't take us to the president, we're gonna drink all your beer.

And they did.

Yeah, drunk and all.

Oh, for crying out loud.

Excuse me, gentlemen, but...

Did they try to brainwash either of you?

As a matter of fact, they did.

Well, they kept telling me that I was Johnny Cash.

And if I didn't do what they saying, well, they was gonna feed me to the hogs.

Let's get back to that part about when they forced you onto the aid in women.

Well, a man's gotta do what he's gotta do.

I think they picked me for my, you know, manly qualities,

because they wanted to carry on their alien race.

What's your problem?

I think you know what my problem is, Mr. Innocent Law Enforcement Official?

Let's just say that you better get some reinforcement in here, and you

better get it in here quick, or else you're gonna lose this whole town.

No, scratch that.

You're gonna lose North America.

These guys can wipe out whole planets before they eat breakfast.

What are you talking about?

I'm talking about the aliens.

The aliens that blew up this guy's truck.

Aliens?

These trucks are in the parking lot.

Oh, right, and you couldn't have had it fixed?

Get this guy out of here.

Okay, fine, go ahead.

Do what you have to do.

But I know that something's going on here.

And until you admit that something's going on, a lot of innocent

people's lives are gonna be in a lot of danger very, very soon.

Maybe we should just try to reason with this guy.

Give me that.

I wish I told you he's the better mood.

Who is responsible for this?

I know what.

We'll do it just like the Cowboys used to.

We jump in the water and walk upstream.

They won't be able to see our footprints.

This is great, really great.

They always knew I'd die a rogue death.

I'm going to be eaten by trout.

You know, I really think you're making a mistake

keeping all that hostility bottled up inside like that.

You gotta learn to express your true feelings.

I'm sorry.

I apologize.

It's not as if I have any...

I didn't say a thing.

Did any of your friends see anything at all?

Sure didn't.

Yeah, I don't blame you for not believing me, chief.

It's not as though massive amounts of evidence is just lying around or anything.

Well, they're small, but they're powerful.

Well, I've seen a real angry one pick up an entire pig and throw it.

Chief Norman, this cow has been mutilated beyond recognition.

I seriously doubt that prairie dogs had anything to do with it.

I'm serious.

They'd pick him up right over the little heads and throw him clean across the field.

Big pigs, 85 pounds.

Incredible.

Do you ever read the National Enquirer, chief?

Like, cattle mutilations are legendary with UFOs.

Look, this animal has a hole in it, three inches in circumference.

It starts at the left side of the shoulder and it goes straight through the stomach.

It's as if some incredibly hot rod had

pierced its body at hundreds of miles an hour.

Why, I couldn't reproduce that in the lab.

You mean to tell me that squirrels did all of this?

No, sir, not squirrels.

Aliens.

Aliens from another world.

Well, I bet it's just a harmless college prank.

Now, by aliens, you mean gophers, chipmunks, and something of that sort?

Look, they're big, clumsy animals.

Maybe she just tripped and fell in the dark.

Phew.

For a second there, I thought you were gonna come out with a really lame excuse.

Injuns more like it.

We caught them here in 92.

And we'll fight them again now.

Look, sooner or later, you're gonna have to help me.

Sooner or later, you're gonna have to admit that something is going on here.

You'll see.

That's right.

Find them and nuke their butts off.

My life is ruined.

I should be home studying.

Aw, cheer up.

We lost him, didn't we?

I don't want to talk about it.

Boy, it looks like somebody lost their cleaning deposit.

It's locked.

Well, break in.

You can't just break in.

This is private property.

Look what I found.

Oh, no, thanks.

I don't drink.

Boy, you're just a fireball of masculinity, aren't you?

I'm sorry, feel free, but I just can't handle it.

Last glass of wine I had, you know, the next thing I know, I woke up

and these guys were chasing me through a cornfield in a crop duster.

This is a complicated world.

We cannot always understand the larger mechanizations that rule earthly events.

And I am not a man who is easily prone to anger.

But when I think of this cow, struck down in the

prime of its life, I cannot help but feel anger.

Can a living being really be extinguished involuntarily?

There are many who believe that this sort of

death emerges out of a sense of hopelessness.

As death stalked her from the rolling hills of

her own pasture, where did Daisy lose her hope?

I did not know this cow personally, but when I see her here at the peak of her productivity,

lying still within the oaken recesses of this coffin, I have to ask myself the question.

Why?

Why?

Why was this bovine taken from us?

I remember

what I was upset about, you know?

Just the thought of children starving in Africa or...

No, prize, and my foot looked... I can't remember.

But I... I just decided at six years old that I was going to...

Seize them!

You're becoming a real pain in the neck, you know that, Buckethead?

Of course she means that in the nicest possible way.

1995, so remember, DeSalvo is for all your hunting and fishing needs.

And we're back, and the number tonight is 851-8540.

In case you've just tuned in, our regularly scheduled hunting show

has been preempted by an important interview with William Hopper.

He's one of the country's leading authorities in terms of UFO phenomena.

Tonight we've been discussing the possible connection between the spades of recent UFO

sightings in the area and today's tragic murder of one of Lem Murdoch's dairy cows.

That's right, and also we'd like to announce that if any of you have seen anything unusual in the area, anything at all, even if you

think it's insignificant, give us a call here at the radio station tonight, or tomorrow stop by the police station and file a report.

That is, if you have nothing to hide...

Hello, you're on the air.

Good evening.

Yes, I was just wondering what your views are on gun control.

Well, I'm for it, but I'm afraid that we're going to have to limit

the calls tonight to this evening's topic, which of course is UFOs.

Thank you very much.

Hello, you're on the air.

Hello, I really enjoyed the program on rabbit hunting last night.

Listen, I was wondering if you heard anything

about deer season opening a week earlier this year.

Do you have a question or any information concerning the invasion, sir?

Uh, no.

Oh, I'm sorry, go on, go on.

Thank you.

Once again, I remind you that tonight the only topic that

we're talking about is UFOs and their sighting in the area.

Now, if you have a comment about UFOs, call me, the number 851-8540.

I think we have a call on that subject.

Good evening, hello.

Well, if like, uh, like if the UFOs landed and stuff, well, would we have to be friendly to them, you know, or could we

just kill them for fun, you know, like with a high-powered, bold action Remington 222, or maybe even a semi-automatic...

Good evening, you're on the air.

Do you still associate?

No, I don't, goodbye.

Okay, that is it, I am getting mad.

This is really, this is your last chance.

I am not kidding, I do not want to hear any fish stories, I don't

want to hear about deer or any animals or hunting like that.

We are talking about UFOs.

You got a call, hello?

A comment?

Yeah, duck season.

I can't believe this.

Okay, that is it.

This is your last and final chance.

I mean it.

No fishing, good evening, hello?

Yes, I have a question about these space men.

Well, go ahead then.

If, hypothetically speaking, creatures from other planets were living in Lake Lure,

what is the chance of them spotting any freshwater trout or maybe catfish or...

Wow, that is unbelievable.

Max, look, look at that spaceship.

Isn't that something, it is huge.

I mean just look at the size of that thing.

My gosh, your gas mileage must be terrible.

Hey, watch it with that thing.

Anything yet?

I want those plans.

It is now only a matter of time.

Oh, you are strong-willed and brave, but I remind you that even those with

nerves of steel will crumble in agony when submitted to hideous torture.

I think he's gonna sing.

This is your final chance, my dear princess.

You will tell me how to retrieve the transmission

data tapes from the droid or you will die.

Look, I'm telling you the truth.

We really don't know how to do this.

We don't know what you're talking about.

He's obviously lying.

I'd torture him if I were you.

I have every intention of doing so.

As for you, do you have any last words?

Yeah.

Could I use your bathroom?

I drank an awful lot back there.

You will remain where you are.

Okay, now you're treading on pretty thin ground, mister.

Don't worry, I won't let you go.

Now that I have the droid in my possession, I shall

personally reduce this miserable colony of Dapon.

Does your mother know what you do for a living?

Connect the mind drain to him.

Terminate the princess.

What is it?

The princess of Jiggi-Pula.

Her name is Jiggi-Pulu.

She is the son of Jiggi-Pulu, and the father of Jiggi-Pula.

What?

Because she is in the world of the princess of Jiggi-Pulu.

Nonsense.

I set these coordinates myself.

This is Plestron and we are here.

I have the princess inside.

Are you calling me a liar?

Boon!

Boon!

Boon!

Boon!

Does anyone else wish to question my navigational abilities?

My God.

They've drained your brain and given you a hideous haircut.

Karen.

Take this.

Here's the plan.

I'm pretty sure these things part of the ship, okay?

So if we were to just borrow these babies and maybe

strand our little alien friends for a few days...

I don't think anyone's going to make a federal case out of it.

Got it?

Karen?

Wait.

Come on.

I know where we can get tons of these chairs.

This guy bought way too many.

Had to slash prices ridiculously low.

Let's go.

Great.

Oh my gosh.

I don't know whether we should have brought the cats or not.

Mama, this got on my side.

Hey!

Hey, stop!

Well?

Over there!

This is not my idea of a fun weekend.

Name?

Lugo.

Randall Lugo.

And your occupation, Mr. Lugo?

I am a scientist, just like you.

And your address?

A planet not yet known to you.

Why are you wearing that wetsuit?

You refer to my epidermal covering?

Yes, your epidermal covering.

To protect myself from your sun's rays.

I have some demands.

Are those your real eyes?

Of course.

I have some demands.

If you Earthlings refuse to meet these demands... Why are they so big?

My eyes?

Why are they so large?

Right.

Your eyes.

Well... Is it to protect them from that bright sunlight on your planet?

Yeah, sure.

Of course.

The sun is so big on your planet, to accommodate all that light...

you had to grow your eyes really big, right?

I was just getting ready to say that.

Right.

Wrong, Mr. Lugo.

I'm sorry, but if you have all that bright sunlight...

your eyes would get smaller, not bigger.

That's right.

Next.

Well, that's quite a story, Mrs. Tundleston.

Oh, yes.

It was terrifying.

Let me get this straight.

You say these aliens...

they were small, brown and very, very quiet?

That's right.

Yes.

Mrs. Tundleston, I don't know exactly how to tell you this...

but I think they were actually some of your dog's duty piles.

I guess that would explain how I was able to outwit them so easily.

Yes, that would account for it.

I guess they won't pose much of a threat to world security then.

No, hardly any at all.

They sucked the bone marrow out of Eddie.

Yep.

Sure did.

And then the UFO went like this...

and then it went like this...

and then it...

went like this.

May I help you?

Sir?

May I help you?

Just browsing.

Don't just stand there.

Flush them out.

I will be outside to finish them when they try to escape.

Get in.

I'll cover you with food.

Okay.

Wait a minute.

Do you hear something?

This is embarrassing.

All right.

All right.

Settle down.

Quiet, please.

Quiet.

During the exam there will be no...

There will be no talking during the... thing.

Whatever.

Let's begin.

You have exactly 24 hours to deliver the plans to me or else.

Or else what?

Well... What are you going to do?

Blow up the entire town?

Well... I don't know.

I guess.

Hey, why not just annihilate every living organism within the city limits?

Okay, sure.

Why not?

Thanks for helping me.

Well, Max, as I think King Lear once said, let's go for it.

Oh, that was close.

Let's go.

Don't worry about Bea.

Go ahead and rescue the girl.

Rescuer?

Ed, you've lost a lot of blood.

Let's let the authorities handle this.

I've got shot for nothing.

You haven't learned a thing.

You're such a coward.

You deserve a career in business administration.

Ed, Ed, take it easy.

Don't you understand?

You've finally found something worth caring about.

And you're going to let it slip through your fingers.

Max, sort out something important to you.

And risk everything for it.

It's worse than I thought.

If what we see is only a fraction of their performance, I

shouldn't think what they'll be like when they reach full power.

That'll be a tough flight, but we'll prevail.

As long as I'm in charge.

We've got to get to them before they reach full operational capability.

If they don't, we're whipped already.

They're quiet now.

Fortunately, I had my boys make a study of their tactical liabilities.

And I think I know what they're going to do next.

I've been a military man all my life.

I almost think like the enemy.

I can anticipate the next moves.

No, no, I don't think we'll have to worry about

another attack until, oh, sometime around midnight.

Give or take seven or eight hours.

Are they telling me that you're going to try and blow up the ship?

That's right.

Colonel, I don't think I have to remind you

that there's an innocent girl aboard that craft.

If you destroy that thing out there, you're taking her with it.

And I don't think I need to remind you that we're

at the future of an entire planet at stake here.

We can't risk the future of humanity for one single individual.

I'd like to help you out, but there just isn't time.

Of course, one has to budget one's time.

I mean, where else, except in this great land

of ours, can you fight for what you believe in?

To face the enemy of tremendous odds.

To save one's single, precious human life.

The life of a fellow American in distress.

No matter how physically attractive she may be.

I believe I'm ready to take over now, Colonel Lacks.

Oh, Mr. Hopper, of course, sir.

No,

no, you've gone to the well just once too often.

There's just nothing left.

Thank you, Colonel.

You're welcome.

You're welcome.

You're welcome.

Are you sure all this is really necessary?

Hey, I'm targeting you.

Hey!

If

it's up to me, I nuked their butts off.

Sorry, Father, I just can't let you go out there.

But you don't understand.

What you're planning is morally wrong.

We're all citizens of this universe.

For all we know, these beings have come in

peace to share their infinite knowledge with us.

Not a task to annihilate that which we don't understand.

We've got to attempt to communicate with them.

I'm sorry, I wasn't listening.

I'm going out there.

But it's... it's too dangerous.

You'll be killed.

It's better to die in the name of peace than live at war with our brothers.

Hey!

Hey!

Please, wait!

Please, it's too dangerous.

Let me go.

Worry not, son.

You must always remember that the hand of friendship

is more powerful than the swords of a hundred men.

Very well.

Good luck.

Oh, thanks.

Perhaps maybe we should just go together.

No, no, I've got many other important things to do.

Go, go rescue the girl at all costs.

And remember, it's better to die in the name

of peace than live at war with your brothers.

Of course, or accept every rule.

Farewell.

Green-eyed enemies are our green-eyed brother.

Gable and I walk through the... I will fear no...

And then the locust.

Gable, the table is bare.

Fear not the locust which blanked thine harvest.

For it is the meek who shall inherit thee.

There's something to that effect.

However, everyone knows that it's the wise man who avoids confrontation.

The locusts are dangerous animals.

Yeah, we don't have to worry about him.

He'll be fine.

Say, father, do we have any more of those green-filled...

What were those?

Were they ladyfingers, ding-dongs?

They were awfully good.

Testing, one, two, three.

Testing, one, two, three.

This damn thing doesn't work.

Those slimy bug-eyed beggars can't hear a word I'm saying.

Ella, what the hell is wrong with this thing?

No!

All right, okay.

Hello, this is William Hopper.

I'm the director of the Bureau for Research on Astral Phenomena.

Now, I'm willing to call a temporary test.

We're going to cease fire and talk things over.

Perhaps we could strike a deal.

What do you say?

Okay, that's close enough.

Okay, freeze or we shoot.

Well, we might shoot anyway, so you'd better freeze, that's for sure.

Attack!

This is it.

I bet this is the death ray they're going to destroy the town with.

Quick, we've got to try and wreck it.

Look, I am exhausted.

And these poor guys, these poor guys in the bunker, they have been shooting for hours.

Well, we were just wondering if it's all right with

you, that is, if it would be okay if we surrendered.

That is, if it's all right with you.

No prisoners, prepare to die.

Fire!

Excuse me.

Thomas, no, he's not cold!

What?

We'll fix it!

Get him, boys!

Guys, I am so damn proud of you guys.

Get out of my way, this is beautiful!

We're, uh, we're willing to reconsider.

Oh, we're, uh, willing to reconsider, are we?

Well, I guess we're not so tough without our little death ray, huh?

Is that what it is, big guy?

Mr. Tough guy, huh?

Hey, what's this?

What's this, huh?

Hey, hey, what kind of a low budget planet are you from anyway, huh?

Huh?

Cream puff, huh?

Here we go.

Thank you, thank you very much.

Thanks oh so much.

Oh my.

What was that all about?

Oh, nothing really.

Ah, good.

Death ray's fixed!

Get the hell out of my mother!

Cover

me!

Nice covering.

Well, I guess everything's under control now.

Good luck, godspeed, how about a hug?

Ah, feels good, doesn't it?

Get me the hell out of here.

The cowards!

I have what I want prepared for liftoff!

We should blow this miserable colony from the face of the planet!

Escape!

Escape!

Abort, take off!

This ship at once or I shall see the lot of you dead!

I heard that.

It's over.

Beg your pardon?

Basically.

Ha ha ha ha.

Hey Larry!

Boys, it's about time for bed.

Honey,

we got any of that meatloaf left?

I have no need of technology to vanquish my enemies.

Seen

your previous assumption about me, evil one?

I am Captain Starfire, master of the universe.

And now, you have met your match.

It is hardly a bare match when you have a weapon, and I am unarmed.

As you like it.

You are a fair man.

Give me your word that you are unarmed.

On my honor, I am unarmed.

Good!

Prepare to die!

I didn't say anything about a supercharged electromagnet.

We're willing to reconsider.

Oh, we're willing to reconsider, are we?

Well, I guess we're not so tough without our little death ray, huh?

Is that what it is, big guy?

Mr. Tough guy, huh?

Hey, what's this?

What's this?

Hey, hey, what kind of a low-budget planet are you from, anyway, huh?

Huh?

Eh, cream puff, huh?

Here we go.

Thank you.

Thank you very much.

Thanks all so much.

Oh, my.

What was that all about?

Oh, nothing really.

Ah, good.

Death ray is fixed.

Help!

Get the hell out of my mother for me!