All language subtitles for Shakespeare and Hathaway.S04E08.And Rarest Parts.en

Your palatial residence,
ma'am. Will that be all, milady?

I don't know why you bought

this motor. Spent all that money

and nothing to "chauffeur" it!

That classical concert should've
came with a warning.

That it contained SAX and VIOLINS!

Do you get it? Sax and...

What's wrong?

It's Artie. Wait here.

Be careful.

Told you.

It's him.

He's here.

Artie?

It's your father. It's your father!

There's no-one here.

It says in my horoscope that
I am going to come into money.

Oh! I had my palm read
at the weekend.

You need your head read if you
believe in all that mumbo jumbo.

Ignore him. Who by?

Madame Ides of March Street.

Ooh, she's good. What did she say?

Well, she said my fate line
is very strong

and she predicted that I'm about
to undergo some obsessive

and strenuous training
for something.

Ooh, ooh!

I predict a client is going to
knock on our door this very second.

You're psychic.

Someone's been
polishing his crystal ball.

I don't...

Hello? Are you Shakespeare
and Hathaway?

I am not.

These are they.

Come in, I'm Frank Hathaway

and this is my partner,
Luella Shakespeare. Hi.

Please take a seat.

I'll get some refreshments.

What seems to be the problem, Mr...?

My name's Leroy John.

We've met before, haven't we?
Did you fix my boiler?

I believe I'm being visited
by my son, Artie.

And?

He's been dead for five years.

Oh.

He was a fantastic lad, Artie.

He was a train spotter, like me.

Everyone wanted to be Artie.

Unfortunately, he died in a tragic
accident at Arden Junction station.

Do you work there?

Sorry, sorry.

And what would you like us to do?

I want you to find proof
that it is Artie.

What makes you so sure
it's a ghost?

Well, how else would you explain
the disturbances at our house?

The alarms haven't been triggered,
we haven't spotted anything on CCTV.

Look, we're very sorry for your loss

but we're private investigators.
We don't do ghosts.

Oh, no, we have.
We've done some in the past.

You're my only chance.
I've been to the police.

They just laughed in my face.
It's Artie,

my son, I know it is.

I've never been
so sure of anything.

We'll do it. Will we?

Yes, and if it is Artie... It is.

..then we will find him,
won't we, Frank?

Hang on, hang on.
We'd need money upfront.

Oh, thankfully, for me money's
no object.

That's it!
That's where I know you from.

You're the guy that won the lottery,
aren't you?

I read about you in the Arden Echo.

OK, OK, here's what we'll do.

We don't usually do this kind
of case

but, um, we'll do a preliminary
investigation

and if there is something in it...
There is.

..then we'll put up some
surveillance cameras.

Great. I trust you'll be in touch.

We will.

Oh, yes!

What have I told you about thinking
with your heart

instead of your head?
Did you see his face?

I thought he was going to burst into
tears right there and then.

I'm not completely heartless,
you know.

It is a lost cause, though.

Morning.
Ooh! Ha-ha! Where are you going to?

I'm Frank Hathaway.

And I'm Luella Shakespeare.
We're private investigators.

We were hoping to just pop up
on that footbridge there

to check something out for
an investigation we're doing.

Can we go through?
No, you'll need a ticket.

Well, we're not going anywhere.
You'll still need a ticket.

Um, OK, so what my partner is trying
to say, um... Perry.

Can I call you Perry?
Yes, you can.

Great. Perry.
Is that if you would be so kind

as to let us pop up there,
we will come straight back

because we're not actually
going anywhere.

No, you'll need a ticket.

Well, that was worth the price of a
return ticket to Wilmcote. Yeah.

Perry? Hi, Perry.

We were just wondering, were there
any suspicious circumstances

surrounding the accident?

I've only worked here for
a couple of months,

but I heard it happened whilst
he was trainspotting.

How can you have
an accident trainspotting?

Sometimes train spotters trespass
on the tracks

just to get the better sightings.

In this case he was up there,
just hanging over the side.

Who makes sure that that flame
is kept alight?

That's Mr John.

He's here most days.
Good luck trying to speak to him.

Why's that? He's just not
very popular

with the fellow train spotters.

Especially since he's come
into money.

Right, if there's nothing else?

No. No, OK.

The press are sniffing
around again.

No, we're not press.

Then why are you looking at that?

We're private investigators.

We're just trying to find out
a bit more about what happened.

It all came out in the inquest.
It was a tragic accident. End of.

Owen Faulconbridge.
Frank Hathaway. Luella.

Pleased to meet you both.

That's Eddie.
He was Artie's best friend.

Come on, Dad!

You'd be better off talking
to Leroy John.

Although most around here

wouldn't trust him as far
as they could throw him.

Do you think there's anything
suspicious about this accident?

No, he's dead as disco.

As what? Disco.

Disco is not dead, Frank!

Wow.

What would you buy if you won
the lottery?

Oh, erm...

I'd buy myself a health spa,
but like in Barbados.

And one where you could drink, you
know, and eat what you want.

So less of the health,
more of the spa.

I'd buy a fridge.

Maybe a trouser press.

How do you think he's
going to take it?

I don't know.
I just hope he doesn't cry. Mm.

Ah, good! Uh, come in.

May I introduce you to...?

That's Kaff, it's Kaff.
Hello, Kaff!

Who's Kaff? You've modelled for all
the greats - Alexander McQueen,

Gucci, Katherine Hamnett.

Oh, my! All my clients used to...
I used to be a hairdresser.

All my clients used to ask me
for "the Kaff".

That was then. I'm plain
old Katherine Corazon now.

This is Frank Hathaway
and Lu Shakespeare.

They're the private investigators
I was telling you about.

Oh, very pleased to meet you.

I suspect you're just here
to set up the surveillance cameras?

Well, actually, Mr John, we've
decided against taking the case.

Yeah, sorry. We did say, though,

that we couldn't really
promise anything.

We don't do ghosts.

Did he tell you it was a ghost?
It's not a ghost.

It's Artie. It's not.

It's someone pulling a prank,
more like.

Do you know anyone who'd
want to do that?

There are lots of jealous types
around here.

It could be any one of them.
It's Artie. It's not.

It's stopping us from moving on
with our lives,

you see. The wedding is soon and...
Ooh, you're having a wedding?

I love a wedding!
Who's the lucky man?

It's me.

Katherine...is my fiancee.

Can you help us? Yes, we can.

Surely. Frank, yeah? We can help.

On the off-chance that it's not
a ghost... It is. It's not.

Do you think Eddie and Owen
Faulconbridge

could have something
to do with this?

They're bitter and twisted,
those two.

I wouldn't trust them as far as
I could throw them.

That's funny cos that's what
they said about you.
Ahh, um...! Sorry.

See? I knew you'd recognise her.

Hm. Her kind of fashion is
not my milieu

but she does look very familiar.
Ha-ha!

And I know what you're thinking.

Ooh! What am I thinking,
Madame Shakespeare?

You're thinking, "What is a
glamorous young fashion model

"like her doing with a
train spotter?"

"Let thy love be younger
than thyself,

"Or thy affection cannot hold
the bent." Hm?

Orsino. Who knows?

According to all the socials,
it was quite the romance.

Yeah, but why did she choose him?

Maybe she felt sorry for him.

Must be awful losing
a son just like that.

Similar to the Bard
after his son died.

Some say that all Shakespeare's
plays after that

were about his son Hamnet.

Anyway, train spotters.

Apart from petty jealousies
about money,

we've got to find out what their
problem is with Leroy.

Thing is, they know what we look
like, don't they,

because we've been down
there already?

Ah, see, what we need is someone
with RADA training who might, uh...

Who might want to go down there
and let off some steam.

That's certainly something to
choo-choo over.

I'll make a stop at Gloria's.

Come on, we've got to put these
surveillance cameras up.

Where are you travelling to?

Er, not.
Well, I'm a...

Ferroequinologist.

A train spotter.

Aye. That's what I am.
Yeah, you still need a ticket.

OK.

Do you want to sponsor
the UK Heart Trust run?

Or leave a donation?
It's a really good cause.

I havenae got any cash.

Just do it next time.
I'll be here.

I'm always here.

Oh, ha-ha. Ooh!

There they are. Good luck.

A hard bunch to get in with.

Thank you.

I'm not sure it's working.

No, yeah, it is. It's on.

Just pop it on the...
That's it, up there. Up here? Yeah.

Like what, there? Yes.

OK.

Well, they do say, don't they,
you can never have too much

of a good thing? You know,

I thought I'd seen enough at
the footbridge but this...

Don't you think this is
a bit spooky?

Well, we are looking for a ghost!

Yeah. Father/son relationships
can be complex.

Minds more eminent than mine have
written books on the subject.

What have they said?
Don't know, never read 'em.

Oh, hello, look at this.

I wonder what first attracted
beautiful young fashion model Kaff

to the multi-multi-millionaire
train spotter Leroy John. Mm.

Haven't seen you around
here before.

I'm new to the area.

Owen Faulconbridge. I'm Scott.

My name is Scott.

Eddie Faulconbridge.

Nice glasses.

What are you into, then?

What am I into? Ahh, well.

You're more of a kettlehead...
than a diesel basher?

Aye. I'm one of those.

So he knows the difference
between a Pacer and a Sprinter.

Even though they sound like
breeds of dog,

they are in fact both trains.

Now, Pacers aren't in service
any more

and Sprinters look like...that.

That's what I call
a beautiful model.

It's a Holman. Very rare.

Only three ever made
and I've got two!

Oh. How expensive?

I could buy a whole train for
the price I paid for this.

I think it's best if you check
into a hotel tonight.

But remember to shut your
alarms off.

Then, when whoever turns up turns
up, the cameras will pick them up.

You'd better get your skates on
if you want to catch Artie.

He's always been quick.
Oh, no, not this again.

Do you remember the time when...?

For Pete's sake, Leroy, he's dead!

Excuse me.

You know when you said train,
did you mean actual, real train?

Boop, boop!

Hey, are you all right?

Yeah. Sorry. No, it's OK.

Artie died days after his
dad's win.

I never really got to know him.

Leroy went from being obsessed
with trains

to becoming obsessed with Artie.

As long as Leroy believes that
Artie is alive,

he won't be able to move on,

and I don't want there
to be three of us in this marriage.

Yes, I understand.
I mean, that's why we're here.

So we can help with that.

I'm sure you will.

Could you think of anyone that
might want to prank Leroy?

Maybe Owen Faulconbridge?
Could he be jealous?

Why would he?
He has what Leroy doesn't, a son.

Yeah.

If you don't mind me asking,
how did you meet Leroy?

He's not the kind I usually go for!

But I met him when I got the gig
to present the lottery cheque.

So when you gave him the cheque was
the first time you met him? Yep!

Wow. What, and you just clicked?
Yeah.

We just got talking.
Something about him.

I can't explain it.
He told me about trainspotting.

My dad was a basher.
Someone who likes

to ride in trains rather
than spot 'em.

OK, right. So your dad was a basher.

Leroy and Artie are spotters.

I think I'm getting
the hang of this.

What's up yon? Hey?

What's up there on the footbridge?

Oh, it's supposed to be a shrine,
of sorts -

for Artie, Leroy John's son.

Is that Leroy John,
the millionaire?

We trainspotted together
for years, the four of us.

Leroy, Artie, Eddie and me.

Leroy and I even bought lottery
tickets together.

Then Leroy stole our winnings.
He didn't, Eddie, to be fair.

We promised to give each
other half if we won.

And we'd have given him half
if we'd won. His son died, Eddie.

We haven't spoken about it since
Artie's death.

I don't care about the money.
I never have.

I'm sorry for bringing it up.

There's no need to be sorry.

Well, I'll be seeing you.

Eddie, I would stay, but
I'm training in the morning.

Night, all.

Night.

We'll see you around, then.

Are you no' wee hame?

Sorry, what?
Are you not going home?

No, um, staying a while.

Best train spotting is at night,
so...

I'm not asleep!

Well, if you weren't, you were doing
a good impression of a walrus.

Why are you wearing my hat?
I'm cold.

Sebastian called. Apparently, Leroy
promised Owen half of his winnings

and didn't pay up. Really? Mm-hm.

But Kaff said Owen had nothing
to do with all this.

Well, we'll find out soon enough.

I hope one of them gets here soon.
Mm.

Hey, while we wait, shall we play
Would You Rather? No.

What? Well, you always get upset.

I don't! I don't get upset.
I just...

I only get upset when
you don't follow the rules.

But if you follow the rules, I'm
not going to get upset, am I? So...

Shall I go first?
I'll go first. You go first.

Would you rather find true love

or find £5 million?

I would rather find £5 million

because that will help me
to find true love.

Ooh, you don't know.
Can't all be like Leroy John,

can we?
She does really love him, you know.

Would you rather...?
Hang on, it's my go!

Would you rather teleport
to the future

or teleport to the past?

Well, you have to be in the future
to teleport to the past.

No, no, you see, it has to be one
thing or another.

That's the rules.

Well, that's my answer. My go.

No, no.

No, it has to be one thing
or the other.

Would you rather fall asleep
in a snowstorm?

Or?

That's it.

You were right!
It is much better at night.

Yeah. I used to do this
with Artie most nights.

What was he like?

Artie was the one who made
trainspotting cool.

And he left to go
to art school in Milan.

Spotting wasn't just a numbers
game with him. He loved trains.

The look, the feel.
Wanted to capture them.

Amazing! How did he get that shot?

He was a daredevil, a maverick.

Would do anything to get
the perfect shot.

Once got chased by
the shed-master trying to sneak

a glimpse of a Class 47 diesel!

He was a legend.

He changed lives, including mine.

You know, in a way, you're keeping
him alive in your photos.

Yeah, well, trying my best.

Long night, isn't it?

Here, have a Bourbon,
cheer yourself up.

I don't need cheering up.
Come on!

I ate them all when you
were asleep!

Oh, look - one of the cameras
has gone down.

Go and sort it out.

I'll go.

You nearly gave me a heart attack!

I thought you were still in
the car.

Yeah, well, some of us find it
hard to follow rules.

Oooh! Oooh!

Let's go and check the cameras.

Oh, wow!

Artie looks like he was
the real Alan Bailey

of the trainspotting world,
doesn't he? David Bailey.

Hm?

There's nothing conclusive on
the cameras.

So, we need to work out whose foot
matches that glass slipper.

No, we need to work out whose foot
matches that footprint.

It could be anyone, couldn't it?

It could just be a thief.

Thief robs millionaire,
it would not be a surprise.

He didn't take anything.
And Leroy said some

of those trains are worth
hundreds of thousands.

Well, it couldn't have been Eddie,
because he was with me.

What about Owen?

He left early.
He said he was training.

Maybe training for that charity run

that the stationmaster has been
collecting money for.

Right, you go and find out
if Owen is our runner.

We need to get back
to Arden Junction. Why?

Leroy wants an update.

We need to tell him
there isn't a ghost.

Refreshments are on their way.

So, anyone visit last night?

Well, look, whatever is going on,
it's not a ghost.

It's not Artie.

Who is it, then?

We haven't worked that bit out yet.

Yeah, so it still could be Artie,
then? I'm afraid not, Mr John.

Can a ghost move inanimate objects?
Or make a footprint?

You need to listen to him, Leroy.

No, you're mistaken.

It's Artie, I know it is! When he
visits, I can feel his presence.

Artie's dead, Leroy.
You need to move on.

You don't understand.
I can't just move on.

You're not a parent.

It feels like I am
with all this carry-on.

What's that supposed to mean?

It means that things are crowded
when they shouldn't be.

Sometimes I don't understand you.

These detectives have proof that
someone has been breaking into our

house, and instead of
addressing that,

you believe it is your dead son.

To tell the truth, I'm getting fed
up of hearing about him.

I've lost my son.
What don't you get about that?

That was five years ago!

Katherine, don't be like that.

Excuse me.

Can we have these to go, please?

Yeah.

Planning this wedding is
stressful enough.

Why are you even marrying me anyway?

Everyone says I'm punching
well above my weight.

Because I love you, stupid.

These flowers are as beautiful
as you are.

Come on, let's go and brighten up
that shrine.

I just hope they work things out,
that's all.

They just have to face facts.
Sometimes opposites don't attract.

You're such a cynical old boot,
Frank, you really are. I know.

Seriously, though, it's obvious
that they love each other.

You heard what Leroy said.

He knows he's punching above
his weight.

Yeah, sometimes love is enough.

Yeah, and sometimes it isn't.

How did you get on? The
Faulconbridges are an elusive lot.

I've looked everywhere.
They're not here, are they?

It wouldn't matter if they were.
The case is closed.

No, it isn't.
Oh, yes, it is.

Oh, no, it isn't!

Anyway, just keep on the case,

and let us know if you bump
into them.

Back again?

A wee donation for your
charity run.

Thank you.

Are you all right there?

Yeah, I just take these to keep me
fit and healthy.

I see that you've got a bit of a
healthy obsession with trains.

I wouldn't call it an obsession.

Many before you have fallen
under the spell of

the glorious beasts that run on
the parallel lines.

Did you know that the rarest train
is the William Shakespeare?

I did! It ran for four months
in 1951.

Yeah! People get obsessed by this.
I told you!

Go, off you go. Go, go.

Yeah.

Something doesn't add up.

Yeah, his cheque for starters.

Well, he's got a track record
of not paying what he owes.

So, what do we know?

Well, we know it can't have
been Eddie. He was with Sebastian.

But it could have been Owen.

What is it you always say to me?
They must have means and motive.

Well, if his motive is to claim
Leroy's winnings, why pull a prank?

He'd just ask him for it.

Not everyone is as upfront
as you are, Frank.

I don't know, maybe we should go
and see Madame Ides, eh?

March Street is only round
the corner.

I'm serious...

Hello?

Yeah, we're coming.

Lu? Yeah? It's Sebastian, something
has happened back at the station.

Oh!

That got my steps up!

What's going on?
Katherine fell off the bridge.

I heard she leant on a panel
and it gave way.

Oh, no!
Is she going to be all right?

I think so. She was unconscious
but she's in the ambulance now.

Thank goodness you're here!
I think Eddie wanted to kill me.

Why would Eddie want to kill you?

Why do you think?! The money.

Calm down and tell us
what happened.

We were on the footbridge,

paying our respects like we
always do. And then...

..Katherine just fell.

Cos one of the panels just gave way.

I tried to grab her but she was
just hanging over the edge.

Eddie could have helped.

I called out to him
but he was stood there watching.

I couldn't hold her on my own.

Excuse me? I need to check you
out in the ambulance.

Eddie wanted to kill me,
just like he killed Artie.

I don't understand.

There was nothing suspicious
about Artie's death.

Grief, like guilt, can be expressed
in many ways.

Eddie?

We just want to find out what
happened to Katherine.

Could you tell us what you saw?

Um, I heard a shout

and I saw Leroy holding on to
Katherine over the edge.

He was screaming at me to help
but I couldn't.

I just froze.

It wasn't my fault.

You were there when Artie died,
weren't you?

Look, we just want to know.
Just leave me alone.

Do you think he's capable
of hurting someone?

I think someone in that state
is capable of anything.

Did you notice where he was just
before Kaff fell off the bridge?

They were on the bridge already
by the time I got here.

This doesn't look like an accident.
The bolts are missing.

With them gone, the whole section
could easily come down.

This changes everything.

We could be looking at
attempted murder.

Eddie seemed quite upset.

Do you think he did have
something to do with it?

Well, there's something he's
not telling us.

I do, luckily, have his address.

That's not far.

I'll go. You stay here in case
he comes back.

Mr Faulconbridge,
can I have a word?

If it's about Artie's death,
I've already told you all I know.

I don't want to talk about Artie.
I'd like to talk about Eddie.

Well, you'd better come in, then.

So, what's this all about?

I'm worried about Eddie.

Social worker as well as
a private investigator, are you?

We ran into him at the station

and heard Leroy blaming Eddie
for Artie's death.

And you believed him?

I told you, you can't trust
Leroy as far as you can throw him.

What's happened?

It's Katherine,
she fell off the footbridge.

We think Eddie might have loosened
the bolts on one of the panels,

hoping Leroy would fall next time
he visited the shrine.

But Katherine fell instead.

Why would Eddie want to hurt Leroy?

Owen, you're not helping him
by keeping quiet.

Eddie and Artie were like brothers,
they went everywhere together.

See, I think deep down
Leroy was jealous of that.

And he blames Eddie
for his son's death?

There must be more to it than that.

After Artie finished uni,
he came back home.

And by this point, he was really
working on his photography.

And he wanted to share that
with his dad.

But his dad's an old-fashioned
train spotter

and not into anything new-fangled.

He saw Eddie as encouraging Artie
to take risks.

After the accident, he told anyone

who would listen that
Eddie was there

and was somehow to blame
for Artie's death.

It was that accusation that ruined
our friendship.

It was never about the money.

Eddie began to believe Leroy's lies

and started to blame himself.

Hang on.

Didn't you say that Eddie
and Artie were always together?

Yeah, but they weren't together
when he died.

But that's not right.

Eddie told us he was there.

Where is he now?

He's upstairs.

Eddie?

Oh.

Where do you think he's gone?

I don't know. But in his state,
there's no telling what he could do.

Hello?
Frank, you need to get here, now!

Eddie's up on the footbridge
and he just won't come down.

Come on.

Don't do it!
Eddie, you come down here.

It isnae worth it!

Please, please, don't jump!

What are you talking about?

All I wanted was there to be
a fitting tribute to Artie.

So you're not going to jump?
Of course not.

Are you sure you're
private investigators?

Oh.

What are you doing here?

I just wanted to let everybody know
that Katherine is going to be OK.

Oh, oh! Oh! Good for you.

What's going on here?

Oh, now, that's what I call
a beautiful model.

Do you remember when the driver
let us stand on the footplate?

Oh, yes, I do!

The Flying Swan,
on a steam special.

It was the last photograph
he ever took.

So you undid the bolts so you could
attach that to the bridge?

Katherine shouldn't have been there.
I hadn't finished.

You weren't to know she'd be there.
We all understand,

it was an accident.

Artie's death was an accident
as well.

I was there when he died.

I told you. I was right.

Artie loved you.
Would do anything to please you,

but you're a hard man to please.

That night, I was there to help.

I was the one who told him to climb
over and get the perfect shot.

If I hadn't pushed him to take that
last shot, he would still be alive.

It wasn't your fault, Eddie.

You were a good friend.

I should have been a better dad.

Yeah. You should have.

You only were after he died.

But even then, not enough to spend
your winnings on a decent tribute.

Artie meant more to me
than all the money.

I would give the whole lot away just
to bring him back.

For both of us.

Well, thanks again.
And, um, this is for you.

Thank you muchly!
I'll take that.

We're really glad that Kaff...

..Katherine is going to make
a full recovery.

Oh, it's only a wedding invitation.
No offence.

Only?! To the wedding of the year!
Thank you.

Excuse us,
we've got money to discuss.

No, I told you,
I don't want your money.

Are you doing
the charity race this year, then?

Not this year, no!

Aw, did you hear that?

Yeah, he'd better have sent
the cheque to Sebastian.

Why? We didn't solve the case. Yeah,
that's Sebastian's fault, isn't it?

He was supposed to talk to
the suspects.

Maybe he got sidetracked.

Tracks.

It rained last night, didn't it?
Yeah.

Then now is the perfect time
to look for footprints. Come on.

Frank, look at that.

No, that's a couple of sizes too
small. And it's a different pattern.

What about that one?

Get the photo out.
Let's have a look.

Zoom in.

What do you think?

It's similar but...

Yeah, let's follow it.

Here, Frank, that's the same.

Yep.

There.

Frank.

Another one.

Perry!

You've got some explaining
to do.

What? It's you, isn't it?

Look, I don't want any trouble.

It was you I chased that night,
wasn't it?

If we looked at those boots,
do you think they'd match

the footprints I found at
Angers House?

Am I under arrest?

No, we're not the police.

It wouldn't matter even if we were.

Leroy's dropped
the trespassing charges.

So what are you going to do?

I think it's about time you came
clean to Leroy John, don't you?

My name's Perry Smee. You might know
me as the platform assistant at the

Arden Junction Railway Station.

"Where are you going to?" Yeah!

Um...

I was diagnosed
with cardiomegaly...

What's that when it's at home?

My heart was too big for my body.

The heart walls became very thin.

Ah! Do you want sponsorship?
Is that what all this is about?

Please, just hear him out.

Um, so before that I was a burglar.
I was good at it.

There wasn't a single drainpipe
I couldn't shimmy up

or a window I couldn't pry open.

I wanted to get
to know more about Artie.

How he lived and how he died.

It was you!

I needed someone with a good heart.

That was your son.

Receiving Artie's heart gave me
a second chance.

So, Artie...
I didn't mean to break in,

I didn't mean to cause
any problems.

Why didn't you just ask us
instead of breaking in?

I thought you wouldn't take
me seriously.

So Artie is part of you?

Yeah, yes, yeah.

Oh, my goodness.

This place in which you have
now met

has been duly sanctioned
according to law for

the celebration of marriages,
and we are here today to witness

the joining of matrimony
of this couple

and to share in their happiness.

What am I?

You're a private investigator,
Frank, if you don't know that now...

No.

..then he or she must declare
it now.

I'm a train spotter.

Oh, sorry. Sorry.

Artie was able to come to the
wedding after all.

Leroy John and Katherine Corazon,

your vows are your promises
to each other.

I now pronounce you husband
and wife.

Woo woo!

I must say, it was
a lovely ceremony.

Francis Hathaway! I mean, we
know I love a wedding

and Sebastian definitely does
but you, you big softie!

Where is Sebastian?

Hello. Oh, hey.
Are you coming to the reception?

Yes, but in a bit.

I've just been told that the actual
William Shakespeare

is expected at any minute.

The actual William Shakespeare?
Didn't he die 400 years ago?

Not the playwriting genius,
the train! Don't you know anything?

I do know one thing -
that Madame Ides was right.

Who'd have thought Sebastian
would be into trains? Mm.

Who'd have thought you would?
What?

I saw you playing with Leroy's
train set.

Oh, hello! Well, I wasn't playing.
I was...

..conducting an investigation.
Come on.