All language subtitles for Shakespeare and Hathaway.S04E03.Too Much of Water.en

So, the other thing she does is
before a film she works out

for three hours a day, which I

probably won't manage but the two
and a half litres of water,

I'm going to try that, because
it gives you this glow and you've

seen the glow and her skin just
looks amazing...

Oh, hang on.

What? What's wrong?
You are kidding me?

What? What's wrong?
Wrong? Couldn't be more right.

We've only been nominated Best
Small Detective Agency of the Year.

No? Yes! Let me see that!

"The Federation of
Private Investigators,

"bracket, West Midlands
and Surrounding Region, bracket,

"are delighted to inform you
of your nomination for

"Small Detective Agency
Of The Year."

Fancy pants ceremony at
The Old Avon Hotel.

A big posh do. Anyone who's anyone.

Get your glad-rags on,
we have arrived.

What am I going to wear? Never mind
what YOU'RE going to wear.

What am I going to wear? Well,
I tell you what I am going to do,

I'm going to start my two litres
of water a day from now.

Two litres? Yeah.

You'll never be off the loo.
Yeah, but I'll look great.

Open up. Come on. This is urgent.

Oi! Be careful with that wood,
it's Grade II listed, this building.

Are you looking for us?
Shakespeare and Hathaway.

You've really got to help me.
I'm desperate.

So, let's get this straight.

Nine months ago, you threw a huge
bash for your wife's 40th birthday,

she blew out the candles on her
cake, walked off the dance floor

and you never saw her again?

Until they found her the next
morning, about a mile downstream.

That's just awful.

I'm really sorry for your loss.

How do you think we can help you?

Coroner's Inquest from yesterday.

Verdict...inconclusive.

Look, I used to be in CID.

Water deaths are notoriously
difficult to solve.

There's no way Ophelia would go
anywhere near the water,

she was terrified,
an absolute phobia.

I own the biggest boat company
on the Avon,

she wouldn't go on any of them.

Can I ask, then, how you came to be
having the party at

a hotel on the river?

Er, my business partner, she thought

it would be a good chance to
take out the little row boats.

Take the guests up and down stream.

Show the hotel what we could do
for future events.

OK, so it was a marketing
opportunity as well

as your wife's birthday.

And presumably you could
write it off as a business expense.

Sounds sensible to me.
Look, trade isn't what it was.

We have had to try out new things,
diversify. Anything wrong with that?

It says here that you and your wife
were separated,

and awaiting a divorce.

Lies. All lies!

Mr Skylark, if we're going
to help you,

we are going to need to know
the facts. Yes, yes.

We'd been split up for a few weeks,

but I thought we'd work our way back
to each other,

just like we always did.

That was why I wanted to have
the party, to show her how much...

..how much she meant to me.

Look, someone must know the truth.

I need closure, I can't live like
this any more. You're my only hope.

Well, we could start by retracing
your wife's last moments.

You'll take the case?

Please, they really need to know...

Sorry, who's "they"?
I should have mentioned it.

Ophelia was insured for £500,000,

but with a suicide clause
and an open verdict,

they're refusing to pay out.

And you think she was murdered?

What else could it be?

So, they found one of these boats,
empty, with one of her shoes,

a champagne bottle

and two empty glasses.

Well, the marketing
certainly worked.

Oh!

You're going to drink all this
in a day? Yeah.

Oh, Frank, it says the state of
the body suggests she had been in

the water for over 15 hours.

Her were lungs full of water, so she
was breathing when she went in.

She was alive, but did she fall or
was she pushed?

What else does it say in
the autopsy? Ooh.

I've never looked at
an autopsy before.

Just ignore the pictures,
look at the words. OK.

It says, "Marks and wounds in
keeping with...contusions?..." Yeah.

"..and lacerations to be expected

"from body being swept along
the river.

"Distinguishing marks - appendix
scar, birthmark, small tattoo."

Doesn't leave us much, does it?

Why are you laughing?

Oh, I was just thinking,

one of Stratford's premier families,

think of the media focus.

This is really going to put us
on the map. Frank!

Well, this is the kind of
high-profile case we

should be doing. The Federation
won't know what's hit 'em.

This year, best small
detective agency.

Next year best...small-to-mid-sized.

The poor woman is dead.

Yeah, sorry. And we should be
finding out why and how.

Well, a tryst with a secret lover?

Moonlit night. Romance.
The Owl and the Pussycat.

They argued. Maybe it was a crime
of passion? Mm.

The young trophy wife and the
jealous husband.

Happens all the time.

Well, at this point we can't
rule anything out.

I need a wee.

I'm not surprised.

Now, this is interesting.

It says Ophelia was found
with all her jewellery except

for her gold watch.

A robbery gone wrong?

Find that watch, we may well
find the murderer.

Too much of water hast thou,
poor Ophelia.

Oh, here he goes. What's that from?

Hamlet. Ham-let. I was going to say
that, yeah.

You were in that, weren't you?
Didn't you play Omelette?

Mm-hm. Look, this is Ophelia Skylark

with friend at the opening of that

new vegan restaurant on

Constitution Street about a month
before she died.

Vegan?

And here she is again and here
again, no sign of hubby.

That's her birthday party,
isn't it?

"Tragic finale for popular
socialite, Ophelia Skylark.

"Guests shocked by mystery
disappearance."

Aw, look! She looks so happy.

And only a few hours left to live.

Was she actually seeing other men?

Because that's not how
her husband painted it.

Yeah, we could do with talking
to this guy. How would we find him?

Let's start with the
step-and-repeat.

The who, what, where now?

The backdrop.

Every high-class event has one.

Oh, Vanessa Rose.

Who?

Only the leading society

paparazza... Paparazza. ..of the
entire town.

You must have heard of her.

She does all the red carpet events.

I'm going to go and talk to her.

Why don't you see if you can find
the CCTV from the hotel.

I'll go check out the boat yard.

Yes, let's find out how Mr Skylark
keeps his business afloat.

Did you see what I did there?

Hm.

There she is. Absolutely gorgeous.

Very photogenic...

Should hope so. The amount of time

and money she spent getting herself
picture perfect.

This is my business partner,
Finty Lees-Jones.

And you are?

Frank Hathaway. Nice to meet you.

I brought in private investigators
to help find out what happened.

Another outlay we can't afford.

I understand the business has had

some difficulties the last
few years? Could say so.

Fuel costs. Half the fleet are
rotting.

If we don't break even this season,

I can't see there being
another one. That's why he's here.

Everybody needs
to fully co-operate.

Well, it will have to wait.
I'm busy.

Da Costa. Late again.

I'm not surprised, going that speed.

Can I ask him a few questions?
Of course. Be my guest.

You may not get far. He's Italian.

His English can be very...selective.

Last warning, Da Costa.

Um, buenos dias, monsieur.

Captain Da Costa at your service.

Major Le Hathaway.

I mean, not really. I'm just...

I'm Frank Hathaway,
I'm a private investigator.

No more questions.

I've already spoken to the police,
told them everything I know.

You don't even know what I'm
going to say yet.

The lady Ophelia. She die.
What else can it be?

Don't you want to find out what
happened to her

on the night of the party?

I was not a guest, I was working.

There's nothing more to say.
My boss, he already hates me.

He doesn't believe we were only
friends. Why make things worse?

I'm just trying to understand...
I know what you're thinking.

You're trying to say that we
were lovers,

we had a fight, that I kill her,
that it was a crime of passion.

So you do think it was a murder.

Now you're trying to put words in my
mouth, just like the police did!

Tea? Coffee? Tequila?

Oh, ha! Yes, I'll have a Margarita
if you're offering.

No, I'll just have a black coffee,
thanks.

It's just so awful.

We used to speak on the phone about
four times a day.

Still can't believe it. Did you know
each other a long time?

No, not really.

Skylark's had hired me about
18 months ago,

they wanted to do a rebrand on
the website.

We just hit it off,
same sense of humour,

we'd get the giggles
and that would be it.

They'd asked me to provide a model,
but once I saw Ophelia,

it was like, well, why bother?

She became the face. Yeah, is that
when they asked you to be

the official birthday party
photographer?

No, I offered. It was my gift.

We'd become so close, especially
since she'd broken up with Jonathan.

Do you think the separation
was her idea? Definitely.

She hadn't been happy in a while.

And then all the issues
with Callum.

Right, yeah. Callum is the stepson?
Yeah.

What issues would they be?

Obviously, it goes without saying,
this is all off the record.

It's just, well, he's so spoilt.

Jonathan could never see it.

It did cause a lot of rows and in
the end, she'd just had enough.

So, the night of Ophelia's
birthday party,

do you remember anything unusual?

Anybody being weird, or...?
No. It was a great party.

Ophelia had nailed every detail.

She'd never looked more beautiful.

I'm sorry. Sometimes you have
a friend, don't you, a best one

and they're a bit more like
a sister.

I could print off the names of

the party guests I photographed
if it helps.

Yes, that would be brilliant.

I know the police have already
taken statements,

but sometimes people remember
something months later. Really?

Oh, yeah, happens all the time.

They didn't think it was important
enough to mention to the police,

but then they remember it and it can

just be that little missing link,
you know?

Your work must be fascinating.

Yeah, I suppose it is.

So, your relationship
with Ophelia, how was that?

Well, Dad seemed happy.

He'd do anything for her.

But you and her?

Yeah, fine.

Your dad said they had quite
a tempestuous marriage.

Well, if you mean fighting, then,
yeah, nonstop.

But then Dad would blow
a load of cash on stuff for her

and it would all be OK again.

He must've loved her very much.

So, the last time you saw her
at the party,

what can you tell me about that?

Um, well, I only really saw her
at the beginning.

I just said hello, she wanted
do a load of photographs.

And how did she seem?

Just the usual. Excited.
Bossing everyone around.

Oh. Liked to be in control, did she?

Um, well, I suppose she just wanted
everything to be perfect.

And after that,
the rest of the evening?

Um, I genuinely don't know.

Oh, tequila!

Yeah, actually, there is one
glamorous thing that we're doing.

You'll probably be covering it,
actually.

The West Midlands Detective Awards.

I've not heard of them.

Really? Oh. We're up for a gong.

It's nothing, really, it's just a
little award. That's fantastic!

You should capitalise on the PR.

How do you mean?
Get your faces in the paper.

I could talk to my friend, she's the
Editor of Stratford Life.

She could do a spread on you.
Really?

That would be great, wouldn't it?

You could maybe do some shots,
a bit of a rebrand.

Like you did for Skylark's.
Yeah, OK.

I think I've got some studio time
this week.

Ooh, have you got any photographs

there of the rowing boats
on the party night? No.

I hadn't brought my outside lights,

Flinty didn't mention it until
it was too late.

Sorry, did you say "Flinty"?

Finty, Jonathan's Rottweiler.

It was Ophelia's nickname for her,
because Finty was so hard on her.

Ooh. They didn't get on.

Do you know why?

Ophelia was a force of nature.

It caused a lot of jealousy.

Did you think it was odd that they
had the party so close to the river?

It was all Finty's idea, apparently,

thought it would be
good advertising.

I mean, they do own a boat company.

Yeah, well, it's just that Ophelia

was terrified of the water,
wasn't she?

Jonathan said she couldn't swim,

but it was more than that,
it was like a morbid fear.

I didn't know.

That never came up.

That's strange, then.

Why would Finty suggest being
on the water?

She must have been terrified.

So, did you notice any tension or
quarrels with any of the guests?

Anything at all? No.

Did you have any reason to believe
that she would kill herself?

What? Suicide? No.

I know it's upsetting. I'm just
trying to get a clearer picture.

I mean, it was a robbery, wasn't it?
Was it?

Yeah, someone stole her watch,
didn't they?

Look, would there be anything else?
I need to go, and...

My dad's going to be on my case.
I've got to go and check the boats.

No. You've been really helpful.
Thanks, Callum.

Morning!

Hello, gorgeous.

Ha-ha-ha!

Ha! Whoa! Eugh! That pongs.

Like a wet mop. It has been in
the cleaner's cupboard.

Oh! Yeah, I'll freshen it up.

No, you are not wearing that,

we'll have to get you
something new.

So what's all this?

I went through all the drownings

in the River Avon over the past
30 years.

These three returned open verdicts.

John Simpson, Helen Ashcroft,
Cally Rawland.

Anything useful for us?
Not a sausage.

Right. So, I suppose the question is
who exactly stood to gain

from the death of
Miss Stratford-upon-Avon 2002?

The runner-up?

All beauties are beastly.

Cruise ship pageant host.
Don't ask.

OK. Did you find anything at
the hotel?

I spoke to the Head of Security.

Absolutely nothing suspicious
on their CCTV.

A swanky place, they would say that.

But I got this from one of the bar
staff who was working that night.

# Happy birthday, dear Ophelia

# Happy birthday to you! #

Not exactly the shy
and retiring type, is she?

So do you think this was literally
the last time anyone saw her? Mm-hm.

Never to be seen again.

You promised you'd have the steamer
back in the water by

the weekend latest.
We've got 50 guests

and a Michael Buble tribute
act booked.

Let me make myself clear,
get it done, or you don't get paid.

You've got three minutes.

Er, well, Miss Lees-Jones -
it is "miss", isn't it?

Let's start with the basics.

Um, how long have you been at
Skylark's?

Since I was two days old. What?

My dad was the boat master
for old Mr Skylark.

And my grandfather, he was the same
for old, old Mr Skylark.

There we all are.

That's me and Jonathan,
still in our nappies.

So you grew up together?

Eventually my dad became a partner,
passed it down to me.

Part of the family, really.

I'm even godmother to His Lordship.

What, you mean Callum?

Just a baby when his mother did her
moonlit to Marbella.

I said to Jonathan, "Give me your
boy, I'll bring him up, no problem."

But then... He met Ophelia?

Quite a force of nature,
by all accounts.

Nothing natural about her.

I couldn't be doing with putting
all that poison in my body.

Poison? Botox. Fillers.

She came in here once looking like
she'd had her whole face burnt off.

Had a laser treatment
to get rid of her wrinkles.

I mean, the lengths some people
will go to.

Yeah, but you have to admit,
she looked a million dollars.

Well, she ought to,
cost nearly that.

Jonathan used to do his nut,
but she could run rings round him.

So you were business partners

and you were in charge of
the money side of things?

And now you're going to ask how

Jonathan got all her reckless
spending past me?

Well, it had crossed my mind.

She'd just hijack his business
credit card.

By the time I found out,
the money was spent.

You ever tried convincing
the taxman a designer bag is

a legitimate business expense?

How would you describe Ophelia
and Jonathan's relationship

at the time of her disappearance?

Same as it ever was. A battlefield.

Not that he'd never dream of hurting
a hair on her...pretty little head.

Jonathan is convinced it might
have been murder.

Do you know of...?

Er, sorry, Mr Hathaway.

Your time's up.

Did you pay for all this through
the company? Stop moaning.

Look, it's just a few things for you
to try on before the awards do,

which makes them
a legitimate company expense.

Anyway, I spoke to Callum,
the stepson.

Oh, yeah. Hated Ophelia
cos she blocked his spending.

Imagine! That's not the impression
he gave me.

Greetings, dear colleagues.
From one weary with toil.

As a dogged and diligent
detective...

Receptionist. Teamaker.

..I have interviewed all 64 guests
at the party.

Yes, I'm amazing.
Yes, you're welcome.

Er, there were 65.

May I remind you that one
of them is dead.

Gather round.

OK, here we have

Linda and Steve Hargreaves.

They mislaid the invitation,

turned up at seven instead
of 7:30, just in time to witness

a huge argument between Ophelia
and Jonathan.

Ooh, do we know what the argument
was about? Indeed we do.

Our dear friend Jonathan was
incandescent about

Ophelia's spending.

Told her she'd blown every penny
they had.

He was absolutely off-the-scale.

I quote, "Ophelia, do you realise
what you've done?

"I could kill you." End quote.

Any other witnesses? Tons.
Hotel staff, Callum, the DJ and,

of course, the photographer.

Yeah, Vanessa Rose has been
really helpful.

Why has she not mentioned this?
Maybe they her told not to.

You know what these posh families
are like.

What happens at Chequers stays
at Chequers. Right, yeah.

I think we should go and speak to
him again. Good work!

For a secretary.

You've got to understand,
she loved the local press,

basked in the attention, but it did
bring a lot of scrutiny.

That's not really what we asked you,
Mr Skylark.

Yes, we did have an argument.

Fints, would you mind giving us
a few minutes, please?

Thanks.

If you knew how bad I feel.

The awful things I said.

We realise this must be difficult
for you, Mr Skylark, but you're

going to have to be honest with us.

Did you threaten to kill your wife?

I just...

I just lost it.

She asked me to get there early
to have a glass of champagne

before everyone arrived.

Couldn't wait, thought we'd turned
a page.

Soon as I saw it all,

ice sculptures, lobster lollipops...

Can you imagine?

..I knew she'd annihilated
the budget.

Finty was going to do her nut.

I just flipped.

But Finty knew you were paying
for the party through the business?

Knew? Yeah, I told you,
it was all her idea,

make it look like a marketing event.

All kosher and tax deductible.

But this was a whole different level
of spending.

I'm really sorry.

Could I use your toilet?

Oh.

Yes, second door down.

So sorry.

So, what was your wife's reaction

when you confronted her about
the budget? Did she fight back?

Fight back?

Yeah, she destroyed me.
Typical Ophelia.

What was my problem?

She always accused me of having
a secret stash somewhere.

She said that I was hiding money
from her

and that if I didn't use that money
to pay for the rest of the party,

she would report me to HMRC.

I saw red.

I said...that I could kill her.

I totally understand your situation.

Oh. Sorry.

The insurance needs to pay out fast
or we're going under.

Still calling the shots, even though
she's dead.

Imagine if Finty knew the true
cost of it.

And it's all my fault.

Ah! Tell me again, why is he out
of the picture?

The body wasn't found for months.

According to the widow,
he died of a heart attack

when he won on a scratchcard -
too much excitement.

Bad timing, really.

He fell in the river and there
was no-one to rescue him.

You haven't drank all that already,
have you? Really, nearly.

# Alas, my love

# You do me wrong

# To cast me off

# Discourteously. #

Aww, that's great. Have you learnt
that Little Mix one yet?

I'm working on it.
No offence, Sebastian,

but you're hardly Brian May.

It just wants tuning.
I was the first understudy Amiens.

As You Like It?

Yes, really tragic. Ah, yes,
really funny. Er, tragic. Funny.

If you're going to Skylark's,

wouldn't it just be easier to dress
as a tourist?

I'm hiding in plain sight.

Plus, who could possibly be
intimidated by me like this?

Dressing this way, barriers
come down, people feel safe

and they share far too much.

That's very clever. Well, make
sure you speak to everyone.

Because as far as we're concerned,

they're all being way too vague
about the night of Ophelia's party.

So they are all suspects.

Speaking of costumes, what do you
make of this little number?

Perfect!

For a Matrix-themed fancy dress
party. Otherwise, straight to

the charity shop, do not pass Go.

Hey! Don't say that.

This is for our portfolio.

What? What?

What? What? What?

You are having your photographs done
with Vanessa Rose, aren't you?

It's...

It's just a few little snapshots
for the website. Bah-bah-bah-bah!

It's really nothing special. Yeah.

And am I included?

Well, we didn't think you'd
want to be.

No, what with you being...

..our number one
undercover associate.

Ah! Yes, you see.

I mean, what good is that, eh?

With your face plastered all over...

All over the place, you won't
be undercover any more, will you?

So that would be no good, and so...

Theatre folk. So touchy.

Yeah, that's it, guys, that's it.
Loads of energy.

Lovely, hold that.

Woo! Lovely.

Brilliant. That's great, guys.

Give us another one like that.

Woo! That's looking great.

Hold that. Ha, yes, Frank.

Let out your inner Beyonce.

You're a natural.

Help yourselves to champagne.
It will help with any inhibitions.

Ooh, I...I met the famous Flinty
at last.

Oh, you can see how she wouldn't

get on with a woman like Ophelia,
can't you?

Talking of not getting on, I believe
you witnessed Jonathan and Ophelia

having an argument
the night of the party.

Vanessa?

What of it?

Wasn't like it was something out of
the ordinary.

No, we were just surprised you
didn't mention it, you know,

under the circumstances.

There were plenty of other people
there. I assumed you already knew.

I didn't realise it was this
exhausting being a supermodel.

Yes! Cheers. Cheers.

So what next?

Frank, put on a black polo neck,

maybe we'll do some shots by the
window, looking all intellectual.

Well, you can try.

Let me just get another lens.

Do you notice anything?

She got spooked by whatever was
in that letter. Mm. Anything else?

You dyed your hair? No!

Borrowed your nana's jacket?
Stop it, that's just rude.

Photographs everywhere

and not one of them of her
best friend, Ophelia.

# And who but my lady

# Greensleeves. #

Bravo! Bravo, bellissimo.

Bellissimo, maestro.

My kind people,

any pennies going spare to feed

a poor, but uniquely talented
minstrel?

Thank you, very kind. Thank you.

There's more where that came from if
you can get the punters

on the boats.

If you're lucky, maybe you and I

will go out for a joyride of
our own later.

What are you talking about?

No, no, no, I spoke to you
last week.

Are you going to make me an offer,
then?

Mate, it's worth 14 grand.

OK, yeah, cool. Deal. OK, all right.

Yeah, I'll be ten minutes.

Hello. An intriguing development.

Remember you said if Ophelia's watch
turns up,

it will lead us to the murderer?

Well...

These pictures were taken by our
assistant at about 12:45pm today.

You'd better tell me what hell is
going on, Callum.

What's happening here? Dad, it's not
what you think.

Finty, will you tell him. You know

I wouldn't do anything to hurt
Ophelia... He knows something.

He stole her watch.

You're accusing the boy?
Jonathan, wake up.

You're still enthralled to that
she-devil. I know you couldn't stand

Ophelia, but if you did anything
to hurt her, I swear...

Dad, I swear to you... OK, OK. OK.

Let's all just take a minute,
shall we?

I'm sure everyone here wants to know
what really happened to Ophelia.

Why don't we start by asking Callum
how he came to have her watch?

I...I found it. Where?

I dunno. Just on the grass at the
party.

OK. So, you picked up the watch,

but Ophelia was nowhere
to be seen.

No. I looked around, but there was
no-one about.

I was going to give it back, Dad,
honestly, I was.

You didn't get the opportunity.

She'd done my head in, Dad, after
that row,

all that stuff that she said to you.

Then trying to get with Antonio,
right in front of your face.

That's nothing to do with you.
What about when she said

she'd dob you into HMRC?
She said what?

You know what she was like, Fints.
It was just a stupid argument.

Look, I didn't even want to be
there. And then when I heard them

singing Happy Birthday,
I knew it was nearly over,

so I should go and check the boats
were tied up.

Did you talk to Antonio?

Yeah. Er, no. He'd already gone.

What time was this?

I don't know. About half ten.

He was supposed
to work until midnight.

And were all the boats tied up?

I figured everyone was done
with them, so I'd stick around,

watch the fireworks
and just go home.

And then it was just lying on
the ground.

All this time and you never said.

What kind of monster have I reared?

Ophelia was right.
I always knew you were spoilt.

Now I'm finding out you're a liar
and a thief.

Dad, I'm sorry.

Me and her, it was never that good,

but no way would I do anything
to harm her.

He's telling the truth, Jonny.

You do believe me, don't you?

Dad?

Honestly, this family.

We were ticking along nicely until
Ophelia came along.

What now?

I just wondering why you lied about
your whereabouts on

the night of the party?

I did not lie.

Apparently you left around 10:30,

you were supposed to be off duty
at midnight.

You weren't running away from
anything, were you?

OK. I...had a date.

Who with?

With the chef - Mario.

He finished his shift, and asked me
to go party with him.

You can ask Mario.

He will vouch for me, I was with him
all night.

Why didn't you just tell the police?

My mother.

She is a wonderful mamma,

but she ever find out that I don't
like the feminine...

..she will be very upset.

That's why I live in freezing
old England.

I could not stay in my beautiful
Positano no more.

So, how did you get on with your
blasts from the past?

Well, Helen Ashcroft.

Her husband said she used to be
very prone to black moods,

reckons she thew herself in.

Freezing water did the rest.

What's Cally Rawland's story?

Snuck out with a pal to
a Take That concert.

Somehow, Cally manages to fall in
the river on their way home.

It was dark, the friend panics,

she didn't raise the alarm till the
next morning, she was scared

she'd get into trouble with her
overbearing father.

Oh, some mate that is.

She was a suspect for a while.

Mum and Dad both long dead,
sister went to live

with some elderly relatives.
No trace of her.

What about the friend? She moved out
of the area 20 years ago,

no-one left to talk to.

Oh, well, you tried.

You're not going for another widdle,
are you?

No. I'm going to pick up
our photos.

Oh, they are fantastic.
You've done a great job.

You've even got Frank smiling!

I think he actually enjoyed it
in the end. Yeah.

Can you give me a sec?
I've got a yoga class.

Feel free to have a flick through,
highlight your favourites.

Oh, OK, will do.

That's...

Ah!

So, what do you think?

Well, I think you're a miracle
worker is what I think.

Oh. You've got a tattoo,

I always wanted one when I was
younger but I didn't have the guts.

This thing? Meant to get it
lasered off years ago.

What does it stand for?

TT for Take That.

Ah!

My older sister was obsessed.

I pretended I liked Jason Orange,

but I wasn't even that fussed.

I just wanted to be in the gang
with her and her mates.

They did it in the kitchen with
a needle.

Ouch! Hm.

Bet you still laugh about it now.

Ha-ha!

Quick, Sebastian, get the footage of
the birthday cake.

Where's the Cally Rawlings file?

What's this all about?

You said the past always informs
the present, right?

Yes. And? So Cally Rawland was
14 years old when she died.

Which means she was born in 1981,
and would have turned 40 this year.

Look, see here? The strap on her
dress breaks, so she does

what any woman does in a disco
crisis, she takes her friend,

rushes off to the ladies to fix it.

And if I stop and zoom in.

See that mark there?

That's a tattoo - TT for Take That.

What, you can tell that from there?

It's in Ophelia's postmortem
report.

But my bet is that Cally Rawland
has one exactly the same.

Yes, here look. "Distinguishing
marks, mole on right cheek,

"home-made tattoo, lower left
shoulder blade, TT."

I still don't get the connection?

Vanessa Rose has exactly
the same tattoo.

Yeah, but, like, Howard Orange

here said - thousands of people
had that tattoo.

You said Cally Rawland's best
mate Leanne

disappeared in her 20s, yeah? Yeah.

What if she didn't?

What if she didn't disappear?

She reinvented herself as
the vivacious Ophelia Skylark.

The irrational fear of water.

Which you would have if you'd
watched your best friend drown.

I think Ophelia's death was revenge
from the grave.

Read this.

"I know what you did to Leanne.
I can make this all go away.

"Meet me at Chamberton Bridge.
Friday 10pm."

That's tonight.
We need to get over there.

Whoever turns up, knows
what really happened that night.

Oh! Ah!

See, I never had her down

as a murderer.

Might have known.

Ophelia always said you were
a nasty piece of work.

Well, she should know.

You think you can blackmail me?

So you did kill Ophelia.

No! I knew it.

It was an accident.

Who's going to believe that?

You lured her to the river,
you pushed her in.

It's OK.

Let's just agree on a price,
I won't say a word.

Oh! No, it's not worth it!

We know you killed Ophelia.

Or should we say Leanne?

We saw a video from the night of
the party of you and Ophelia

going towards the loos to fix
a broken strap.

Was that the first time you'd seen
the tattoo?

The home-made one that you
and your sister had

in exactly the same place.

Why don't we go outside?

Leanne.

It just so happened that Finty
was already in the ladies

when the two of you came in.

You like hiding behind doors,
don't you, Finty?

What did happen when you got
outside?

I don't understand.

Who are you?

You don't have to hide any more,
Leanne.

Rosie?

Little Rosie Rawland.

You let my sister die.

You could have raised the alarm,
but you ran away.

No. No.

My family was destroyed
because of you!

You made Cally sneak out
to that concert,

you knew you'd get in to trouble,
so you left her

to freeze to death in that water!

It wasn't like that.

And then Callum appeared
to check the boats, so I hid.

He was there for what seemed like
an age.

Then when I went back to
the river...

Ophelia!

..it was too late.

Ophelia!

I just panicked.

Ophelia, please!

I didn't know what I was doing.

And then I saw a shoe.

I threw it in a boat, grabbed
a bottle and some glasses

that were lying about and pushed the
boat out onto the river.

But someone had seen everything.

I didn't kill her.

Please, you have to believe me.

It all happened so quickly.
She tripped.

I tried to look for her,
but she was gone.

I couldn't help it.

25 years I've been looking for
Leanne.

All those years of hate and I just
wanted an explanation.

You didn't realise that plain
old Leanne Jacobs, your

sister's best friend, was in fact
the fabulous Ophelia Skylark?

I didn't mean for any of this
to happen.

I know.

This is our night. I can feel it!

Are you ready, kid? Ready.

I can't believe it.
Finally, recognition from our peers.

Well, we deserve it.
Let's savour every moment.

Hey, I wonder what kind
of can-apes they'll have.

You what? Can-apes.

Oh! Cana-peas. No, not petit pois.

I mean, the posh food. You know,
like sweet chilli fishcakes.

Ooh, I hope they've got
those little spoons

with the king prawns
in and the garlic mayo.

Which bull's pizzle didn't read
the invitation properly?

Not The Old Avon Hotel,

The Old Avon Sports and Social Club,
two miles down the road.

And then I got the jacket. 200 quid.

Yeah, and so my hairdo... 80 quid.

Yeah, and then I had a spray tan...
30 quid. ..and my lashes.

All on the company. Yeah.

My facialist spent 90 minutes
pummelling my orbicularis oris.

Ooh! Was that on the company? No.

Well, look, you both look amazing.

Oh! Shush! Shush! Shush!
Here she comes.

The winner of this year's
small boutique agency is...

..Sharman and Hepplewhite.

Shots? BOTH: Shots.

Hey, on the company.