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1
00:01:13,541 --> 00:01:18,145
And one, and two, and three, and four.
2
00:01:18,312 --> 00:01:21,315
And one, and two, and three, and four.
3
00:01:21,482 --> 00:01:24,985
And one, and two, and three, and four.
4
00:01:25,152 --> 00:01:28,456
And rest.
5
00:01:30,458 --> 00:01:32,126
Okay, ladies. Let's take a break...
6
00:01:32,293 --> 00:01:37,364
{\an8}...While I mix up a Jim Jupiter
spirulina and wheat-grass shake.
7
00:01:39,500 --> 00:01:43,137
Look at that sweat glistening
off of Jim Jupiter's arms.
8
00:01:43,304 --> 00:01:47,575
Come on, baby,
Mama wants a salt lick.
9
00:01:50,978 --> 00:01:55,115
I wouldn't mind being
the first woman on Jupiter.
10
00:01:56,217 --> 00:01:59,320
Not that Steve is anything to laugh at.
11
00:02:04,058 --> 00:02:06,827
You know, it does seem odd, doesn't it?
12
00:02:06,994 --> 00:02:09,830
I mean, Al and Steve
look nothing like Jim...
13
00:02:09,997 --> 00:02:14,068
...And yet they're all lumped
together as "men."
14
00:02:14,235 --> 00:02:16,036
Well, let's not be hasty.
15
00:02:16,203 --> 00:02:19,240
Men like Jim Jupiter may not be
all they're cracked up to be.
16
00:02:19,406 --> 00:02:23,444
Take away his biceps, triceps,
quadriceps, washboard stomach...
17
00:02:23,611 --> 00:02:24,879
...And what have you got?
18
00:02:29,216 --> 00:02:31,218
No more tacos at lunch for me.
19
00:02:32,620 --> 00:02:37,291
Peg, could you wring this shirt out?
I gotta wear it tomorrow.
20
00:02:37,458 --> 00:02:40,895
- Is there any food?
- There's a six-pack in the fridge.
21
00:02:41,061 --> 00:02:43,330
I'd like to have something
to wash it down with.
22
00:02:43,497 --> 00:02:46,467
Why don't you pop
this chicken in the oven?
23
00:02:46,634 --> 00:02:49,637
Excuse me, Marce.
That's an honest mistake.
24
00:02:50,704 --> 00:02:53,240
Squish away from me.
25
00:02:54,108 --> 00:02:57,211
I've known him for four years,
and I've never seen him dry.
26
00:02:57,378 --> 00:03:00,281
You've never had sex with him.
27
00:03:01,949 --> 00:03:04,485
Oh, look, Jim's greased up and ready.
28
00:03:04,652 --> 00:03:06,720
Who's the sissy mary?
29
00:03:06,887 --> 00:03:09,590
That's Jim Jupiter,
the healthiest man in Chicago.
30
00:03:09,757 --> 00:03:13,594
Oh, yeah? Does he have guns like these?
31
00:03:17,631 --> 00:03:22,269
Put your arms down, Al.
You're killing the plants.
32
00:03:22,436 --> 00:03:24,071
Jim's speaking.
33
00:03:24,238 --> 00:03:27,241
Okay, ladies. You know
what it's time to do now.
34
00:03:27,408 --> 00:03:29,710
Dash off to a Judy Garland concert?
35
00:03:31,345 --> 00:03:34,748
It's time to announce the winner
of the free Jim Jupiter workout.
36
00:03:34,915 --> 00:03:38,352
Yup. Jim is gonna spend two whole,
healthy weeks with some lucky woman.
37
00:03:38,519 --> 00:03:41,055
- Me, me, me!
- Me, me, me, me!
38
00:03:41,221 --> 00:03:43,357
What lucky lady will
get to spend two weeks...
39
00:03:43,524 --> 00:03:47,461
...with Jim Jupiter,
the healthiest man in Chicago?
40
00:03:47,628 --> 00:03:50,931
And the winner is...
41
00:03:52,232 --> 00:03:54,868
...Ms. Peggy Bundy!
42
00:03:58,472 --> 00:04:01,342
I can't believe it!
I can't believe it!
43
00:04:01,508 --> 00:04:02,876
I've never won anything.
44
00:04:03,043 --> 00:04:04,645
I've never had anything.
45
00:04:04,812 --> 00:04:09,750
Oh, finally, someone special
to share my life with.
46
00:04:10,784 --> 00:04:13,520
Peg, I know you never asked for
my permission when we got married...
47
00:04:13,687 --> 00:04:15,155
...Or when you conceived the children...
48
00:04:15,322 --> 00:04:18,425
...But if you think that fruit loop
is staying in my house--
49
00:04:18,592 --> 00:04:19,827
Oh, Marcie.
50
00:04:19,994 --> 00:04:23,697
Marcie, I get to watch Jim Jupiter
do squat thrusts...
51
00:04:23,864 --> 00:04:26,634
...For two whole weeks in my house.
52
00:04:26,800 --> 00:04:28,636
Can you believe it?
53
00:04:28,802 --> 00:04:30,371
Oh, so what?
54
00:04:30,537 --> 00:04:34,508
Who needs him?
I already have a real man at my house.
55
00:04:34,675 --> 00:04:39,346
A wandering minstrel, I
A thing of shreds and patches
56
00:04:39,513 --> 00:04:42,950
What do you say, Marce?
Wanna go see Mikado tonight?
57
00:04:43,117 --> 00:04:46,220
For he's going to marry
Yum-Yum, Yum-Yum
58
00:04:47,621 --> 00:04:50,658
Oh, please, let me watch Jim squat.
Just once. Please?
59
00:04:50,824 --> 00:04:52,726
Well, okay. But don't touch.
60
00:04:52,893 --> 00:04:56,764
Now, I've got to buy a new leotard.
I wanna look great for Jim.
61
00:04:56,930 --> 00:04:59,867
Forget it. He's not coming.
No, ma'am. No chance.
62
00:05:00,034 --> 00:05:04,905
No way, no how. Peg, I'm sorry,
but this time I just have to say--
63
00:05:06,273 --> 00:05:08,308
I have spoken.
64
00:05:12,312 --> 00:05:14,048
Wanna see Mikado tonight?
65
00:05:14,848 --> 00:05:16,850
Who's he fighting?
66
00:05:18,252 --> 00:05:19,586
I can't believe it!
67
00:05:19,820 --> 00:05:24,792
I get to watch Jim Jupiter flex and
ripple in the privacy of my own home.
68
00:05:24,958 --> 00:05:27,394
Mom, do I really have to
share a room with Kelly...
69
00:05:27,561 --> 00:05:29,196
...While that exercise guy is here?
70
00:05:29,363 --> 00:05:31,832
I'll be up all night
with all those guys babbling:
71
00:05:31,999 --> 00:05:34,968
"Hurry up. I gotta get back to the ship."
72
00:05:42,443 --> 00:05:44,812
Oh, it's really gonna be easy
for me to sleep too.
73
00:05:44,978 --> 00:05:48,449
With you whispering
"I love you" to your hand.
74
00:05:52,286 --> 00:05:54,388
Now, kids...
75
00:05:54,555 --> 00:05:58,525
...Will you just forget about your empty
little lives and think about mine?
76
00:05:58,692 --> 00:06:00,728
Jim Jupiter will be here any minute.
77
00:06:00,894 --> 00:06:02,329
Now, how do I look?
78
00:06:02,496 --> 00:06:05,365
- Hot.
- Desperate.
79
00:06:06,567 --> 00:06:10,604
Good. I didn't wanna send
any mixed signals.
80
00:06:10,771 --> 00:06:12,773
Oh, he's here! He's here!
81
00:06:12,940 --> 00:06:18,378
Okay, now, everybody behave normally
and don't say anything stupid.
82
00:06:19,413 --> 00:06:21,381
Come to Mama.
83
00:06:21,882 --> 00:06:23,584
I know, I know.
84
00:06:23,751 --> 00:06:26,420
I'm Jim Jupiter,
the healthiest man in Chicago.
85
00:06:26,854 --> 00:06:31,425
Hi, I'm Bud Bundy,
the studliest man on Earth.
86
00:06:33,393 --> 00:06:37,264
I'm Kelly Bundy.
It's a pleasure to meet you, Jim.
87
00:06:40,501 --> 00:06:43,003
He's mine. Hi!
88
00:06:43,170 --> 00:06:44,471
I'm Peggy Bundy.
89
00:06:44,638 --> 00:06:48,776
Don't let the wedding ring fool you.
It means nothing to me.
90
00:06:49,910 --> 00:06:52,012
Jim.
91
00:06:52,279 --> 00:06:56,083
Bud Bundy. We met a moment ago.
92
00:06:56,250 --> 00:06:58,786
I have a question for you.
93
00:07:00,154 --> 00:07:03,924
How do I gain upper-body strength?
94
00:07:04,091 --> 00:07:07,494
Wear weights on your arms
when you squeeze your pimples?
95
00:07:08,295 --> 00:07:10,931
- Stuff a bra!
- Pick a nose!
96
00:07:11,098 --> 00:07:16,737
Now, kids, Jim just got here,
and I'm sure he'd like to strip down.
97
00:07:16,904 --> 00:07:19,406
I mean, sit down and relax.
98
00:07:20,641 --> 00:07:23,911
So go away. Dinner's in two weeks.
99
00:07:37,224 --> 00:07:40,928
The correct way to pick something up
is to bend from the knees.
100
00:07:42,062 --> 00:07:44,431
What a shame.
101
00:07:44,598 --> 00:07:48,836
A body like that
and not a brain in his head.
102
00:07:56,543 --> 00:07:58,378
Okay, Jim.
103
00:07:58,545 --> 00:08:02,182
Bend me, shape me, any way you want me.
104
00:08:02,349 --> 00:08:04,852
You've got a good, healthy attitude
about exercise.
105
00:08:05,018 --> 00:08:07,054
I guess we could start with some warm-ups.
106
00:08:07,221 --> 00:08:09,156
Get down on all fours.
107
00:08:23,770 --> 00:08:26,240
Hi, Peg.
108
00:08:26,740 --> 00:08:28,809
How was your day?
109
00:08:29,142 --> 00:08:30,544
Looking up.
110
00:08:30,711 --> 00:08:32,613
Al, meet Jim.
111
00:08:32,779 --> 00:08:35,549
I'm Jim Jupiter,
the healthiest man in Chicago.
112
00:08:35,716 --> 00:08:40,187
Then you should heal quick when
I pull your spine through your mouth.
113
00:08:40,354 --> 00:08:42,389
Now, now, now, boys.
114
00:08:42,556 --> 00:08:45,092
No need to fight.
We're all adults here.
115
00:08:45,259 --> 00:08:47,427
I think we can come to an understanding.
116
00:08:47,594 --> 00:08:51,098
But I'm warning you, if the two of you
can't come to an understanding...
117
00:08:51,265 --> 00:08:54,801
...I'm afraid you'll just have to leave, Al.
118
00:08:55,469 --> 00:08:57,304
Peg, can I see you over here for a minute?
119
00:08:57,471 --> 00:08:59,273
Sure, honey.
120
00:09:00,607 --> 00:09:02,843
Now, Peg, as you know,
I am the man...
121
00:09:03,010 --> 00:09:06,513
...And a man's home is his coffin.
122
00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:08,782
Don't you understand?
123
00:09:08,949 --> 00:09:11,785
I just want what
every married woman wants:
124
00:09:11,952 --> 00:09:15,989
Someone besides her husband to live with.
125
00:09:16,156 --> 00:09:18,659
I mean, what do you think
I'm gonna do with him?
126
00:09:18,825 --> 00:09:21,361
Lick him up and down?
127
00:09:23,964 --> 00:09:28,335
Nuzzle my head against
his rippling, heaving chest?
128
00:09:28,502 --> 00:09:30,203
Plant little angel kisses...
129
00:09:30,370 --> 00:09:34,074
- ...All over his glistening--
- Okay, so it's innocent.
130
00:09:35,575 --> 00:09:37,778
But I still don't see
what you need him for.
131
00:09:37,945 --> 00:09:41,181
You wanna bend? Dust.
132
00:09:41,348 --> 00:09:44,217
You wanna reach? Sweep.
133
00:09:44,384 --> 00:09:48,188
You want sex? Just let me know
when you're finished, I'll come home.
134
00:09:53,727 --> 00:09:56,797
Now, Peg, I'm only
gonna say this one time.
135
00:09:56,964 --> 00:09:59,566
I want him out of here,
I want you in the kitchen...
136
00:09:59,733 --> 00:10:01,668
...And I want my supper now.
137
00:10:03,403 --> 00:10:06,673
Okay, Jim. Al's going out to dinner.
138
00:10:07,107 --> 00:10:10,577
Instead of going to dinner, why don't
you stay and work out with us?
139
00:10:10,744 --> 00:10:13,613
What's the point of having
a beautiful, sexy, young wife...
140
00:10:13,780 --> 00:10:16,083
...If you're just gonna look like that?
141
00:10:18,318 --> 00:10:20,787
Listen, Jim-bellina.
142
00:10:23,190 --> 00:10:26,626
Don't let these slits
on my wrists fool you.
143
00:10:26,793 --> 00:10:29,429
I'm in great shape.
I was an athlete in high school.
144
00:10:29,629 --> 00:10:31,965
So was I. I was a gymnast.
145
00:10:34,968 --> 00:10:37,871
A gymnast isn't an athlete.
A gymnast is...
146
00:10:38,038 --> 00:10:40,774
...Like, like a girl.
147
00:10:47,047 --> 00:10:50,283
I'm just here to borrow some spirulina.
148
00:10:50,450 --> 00:10:52,919
Jim Jupiter!
149
00:10:53,086 --> 00:10:57,090
Honey, it's Jim Jupiter.
What a surprise.
150
00:10:57,257 --> 00:11:00,961
Gee, I'll bet he came in that van outside
that says, "Jim Jupiter."
151
00:11:01,128 --> 00:11:02,162
Shut up.
152
00:11:02,329 --> 00:11:06,466
Hi, I'm Marcie.
This is my husband, Scrawny.
153
00:11:09,136 --> 00:11:10,604
I mean, Steve.
154
00:11:10,771 --> 00:11:13,306
Hi, I'm Jim Jupiter.
Nice to meet you, Steve.
155
00:11:13,473 --> 00:11:15,509
Nice, firm handshake.
156
00:11:15,675 --> 00:11:19,613
Yeah, well, I played a little
sousaphone in high school.
157
00:11:20,113 --> 00:11:22,849
Were you two getting ready
to exercise? I hate to interrupt.
158
00:11:23,016 --> 00:11:25,252
- Well, actually, Jim and I were--
- Good, good.
159
00:11:25,419 --> 00:11:29,956
Well, I'm all warmed up. Let's get
down on the floor and get pumped.
160
00:11:31,258 --> 00:11:35,095
You believe these two want this guy?
You know what he did in high school?
161
00:11:35,262 --> 00:11:37,531
He was a gymnast.
162
00:11:40,233 --> 00:11:41,568
Football and the band.
163
00:11:41,735 --> 00:11:44,771
That's where the men were
in our day, right, buddy?
164
00:11:46,173 --> 00:11:48,208
What say we go get us a pizza, Steve?
165
00:11:48,375 --> 00:11:51,111
Yeah. Let's eat till we vomit.
166
00:11:51,678 --> 00:11:53,914
You know, like men.
167
00:11:54,481 --> 00:11:59,119
For we're going to eat
Yum-yum, yum-yum
168
00:11:59,286 --> 00:12:02,622
Let's begin with some in-place runs
to burn off the tension.
169
00:12:06,927 --> 00:12:08,795
You know, you got a lot of nerve.
170
00:12:08,962 --> 00:12:12,632
Did I come over to your house when
you won the Woman In Banking award?
171
00:12:12,799 --> 00:12:16,203
Yes, you did.
And you stole a whole chicken.
172
00:12:17,671 --> 00:12:21,875
Yeah, but at least I didn't wiggle
my butt in front of it when I did it.
173
00:12:22,042 --> 00:12:24,811
Follow me, ladies.
174
00:12:24,978 --> 00:12:27,180
You know, Marcie, you're right.
175
00:12:27,347 --> 00:12:31,118
There is plenty of Jim to go around.
Let's not forget we're friends. Agreed?
176
00:12:31,284 --> 00:12:33,053
Agreed.
177
00:12:36,790 --> 00:12:40,994
And three, and four, and rest.
178
00:12:41,161 --> 00:12:44,464
- What happened to Marcie?
- Oh, she lost interest.
179
00:12:44,631 --> 00:12:47,300
Let me in, you swine!
180
00:12:48,401 --> 00:12:50,303
Okay, Jim. I'm beat.
181
00:12:50,470 --> 00:12:54,241
I'm just gonna sit over here
while you flex me off to sleep.
182
00:12:54,407 --> 00:12:56,843
That's not quite how it works,
Mrs. Bundy.
183
00:12:57,978 --> 00:13:00,147
Just how does it work, Jim?
184
00:13:00,313 --> 00:13:03,817
And one, and two, and three, and four...
185
00:13:03,984 --> 00:13:06,586
...And five, and six, and seven...
186
00:13:06,753 --> 00:13:11,158
Twelve, 13, 14, 15, 16...
187
00:13:11,324 --> 00:13:15,295
Forty-five, 46, 47, 48, 49...
188
00:13:15,462 --> 00:13:22,102
Fifty-seven, 58, 59, 60, 61, 62, 63, 64...
189
00:13:22,269 --> 00:13:24,971
...65, 66, 67...
190
00:13:35,415 --> 00:13:38,919
And 197 and 198...
191
00:13:39,085 --> 00:13:43,023
...And 199 and 200.
192
00:13:43,190 --> 00:13:44,925
Okay.
193
00:13:45,091 --> 00:13:46,660
I think you're warmed up.
194
00:13:46,826 --> 00:13:48,295
Let's get started.
195
00:13:51,398 --> 00:13:52,566
Bonbon.
196
00:13:52,732 --> 00:13:54,801
No bonbons.
197
00:13:54,968 --> 00:13:56,870
Okay, Jim.
198
00:13:57,037 --> 00:14:00,040
Let's clear up a few misconceptions.
199
00:14:00,207 --> 00:14:03,677
There are two things
Peggy Bundy doesn't do.
200
00:14:03,843 --> 00:14:05,145
Number one:
201
00:14:05,312 --> 00:14:10,350
Cook, clean, sew, vacuum,
iron, and parent.
202
00:14:11,451 --> 00:14:14,120
And number two:
Exercise.
203
00:14:14,554 --> 00:14:17,591
Well, Jim Jupiter loves a challenge.
204
00:14:17,757 --> 00:14:19,492
Bonbon.
205
00:14:19,659 --> 00:14:21,795
I'm here to change your life,
Peggy Bundy.
206
00:14:21,962 --> 00:14:24,331
Bonbon!
207
00:14:24,497 --> 00:14:26,666
Mrs. Bundy, you're a strong woman.
208
00:14:26,833 --> 00:14:28,935
But I'm the healthiest man in Chicago.
209
00:14:29,102 --> 00:14:32,672
I can see this week
is gonna be a test of wills.
210
00:14:41,181 --> 00:14:43,049
Bonbon.
211
00:14:46,987 --> 00:14:48,922
I like strawberry the best, don't you?
212
00:14:49,089 --> 00:14:50,490
Actually, the mocha are--
213
00:14:50,657 --> 00:14:52,559
Oprah's on!
214
00:14:59,266 --> 00:15:01,034
Peggy, you look fabulous.
215
00:15:01,201 --> 00:15:02,969
That time with Jim really paid off.
216
00:15:03,136 --> 00:15:05,472
- Do you feel better?
- Oh, I certainly do.
217
00:15:05,639 --> 00:15:08,308
And Jim says as long as
I stick with my program...
218
00:15:08,475 --> 00:15:11,311
...I'll live a long and happy life.
219
00:15:11,478 --> 00:15:12,812
Oh, he's on.
220
00:15:12,979 --> 00:15:15,915
And now, ladies, live from Chicago...
221
00:15:16,082 --> 00:15:19,486
...The Jim Jupiter show!
222
00:15:21,988 --> 00:15:25,458
Hi, ladies. I'm Jim Jupiter...
223
00:15:25,625 --> 00:15:27,894
...The healthiest man in Chicago.
224
00:15:28,061 --> 00:15:33,066
Now, let's get that exercise thing
over with, shall we?
225
00:15:33,233 --> 00:15:34,501
And one...
226
00:15:36,202 --> 00:15:38,672
He's put on some weight, hasn't he?
227
00:15:38,838 --> 00:15:41,441
Oh, he's just pumped.
228
00:15:41,608 --> 00:15:43,843
In his chin?
229
00:15:44,244 --> 00:15:47,247
Don't worry about Jim.
He knows what he's doing.
230
00:15:47,414 --> 00:15:50,183
He is the healthiest man in Chicago.
231
00:15:59,359 --> 00:16:00,627
Oh, no!
232
00:16:00,794 --> 00:16:02,595
He-- He's dead!
233
00:16:06,433 --> 00:16:08,435
My boyfriend's dead!
234
00:16:08,601 --> 00:16:10,670
Your boyfriend?
He's my boyfriend!
235
00:16:10,837 --> 00:16:12,539
- No. Mine.
- Mine!
236
00:16:12,706 --> 00:16:14,441
- Mine!
- He's mine!
237
00:16:14,607 --> 00:16:17,844
Oh, my hair! You tramp!
238
00:16:18,878 --> 00:16:22,215
I can't believe it. He looked
so healthy when he was here.
239
00:16:22,382 --> 00:16:25,018
What could have happened to him?
240
00:16:37,731 --> 00:16:42,068
"Blood-sugar level enough
to kill three horses...
241
00:16:42,235 --> 00:16:47,474
...Cholesterol level high enough
to dam the mighty Mississippi."
242
00:16:47,640 --> 00:16:50,043
That's writing!
243
00:16:50,210 --> 00:16:52,746
Oh, it's my fault, Al. I did it.
244
00:16:52,912 --> 00:16:55,648
I killed the healthiest man in Chicago.
245
00:16:56,516 --> 00:16:59,519
Well, you've been killing me
and you don't seem to care.
246
00:16:59,953 --> 00:17:01,788
Yeah, you're different.
247
00:17:01,955 --> 00:17:04,791
You've been as good as dead for years.
248
00:17:04,958 --> 00:17:08,995
But what about our children?
I mean, is our lifestyle killing them?
249
00:17:09,162 --> 00:17:11,197
Do we care enough about our kids?
250
00:17:11,364 --> 00:17:14,367
- Are we concerned enough, as parents?
- Where are the kids?
251
00:17:14,534 --> 00:17:16,636
How would I know?
252
00:17:18,304 --> 00:17:21,908
Burgers here.
Now, who had the wet and greasy?
253
00:17:25,311 --> 00:17:27,714
No more burgers for this family.
254
00:17:31,885 --> 00:17:35,155
Well, then how do we get
our vitamins and rocks?
255
00:17:37,290 --> 00:17:40,293
That-- That's minerals, Kel.
256
00:17:42,295 --> 00:17:44,097
Yeah.
257
00:17:44,264 --> 00:17:47,700
Don't you get it?
Did Jim Jupiter die in vain?
258
00:17:47,867 --> 00:17:51,871
Well, Jim taught me that enjoying
your food only leads to death.
259
00:17:52,038 --> 00:17:55,074
And I will not be responsible
for the death or enjoyment...
260
00:17:55,241 --> 00:17:58,344
...Of any member of this family.
261
00:17:58,511 --> 00:18:02,215
So, for once, we Bundys
are gonna learn from our mistakes.
262
00:18:02,382 --> 00:18:05,385
Bud, you will not be a shoe salesman.
263
00:18:08,254 --> 00:18:11,691
And from now on, we're going
to start eating right.
264
00:18:11,858 --> 00:18:14,260
You mean with forks?
265
00:18:16,129 --> 00:18:18,498
I am trying to show love for this family.
266
00:18:18,665 --> 00:18:20,834
So either shut up or get out.
267
00:18:25,271 --> 00:18:26,606
Get back here!
268
00:18:28,041 --> 00:18:29,375
All right, now.
269
00:18:29,542 --> 00:18:31,778
I will make the first sacrifice.
270
00:18:36,616 --> 00:18:38,952
My bonbons.
271
00:18:44,424 --> 00:18:46,593
Sorry, Buck!
272
00:18:46,759 --> 00:18:49,429
And now, we eat dinner.
273
00:18:51,164 --> 00:18:52,699
Nice life.
274
00:18:52,866 --> 00:18:56,035
Mom kills some guy and we have to suffer.
275
00:18:56,202 --> 00:19:00,039
Yeah. Why didn't we have to use forks
when Aunt Pearlie killed Uncle Dave?
276
00:19:00,206 --> 00:19:04,711
Well, that was just an accident.
The ice pick just flew out of her hand.
277
00:19:05,945 --> 00:19:08,448
Thirteen times?
278
00:19:12,452 --> 00:19:17,657
Daddy, if I eat any more of this
wheat "gurm," I'm gonna lose my mind.
279
00:19:21,528 --> 00:19:24,964
Dad, you think you're the boss.
Do something.
280
00:19:26,132 --> 00:19:27,967
No can do, Bud.
281
00:19:28,134 --> 00:19:31,538
See, your mother's never actually
physically killed a man before.
282
00:19:32,138 --> 00:19:34,641
I'm afraid we're gonna have to
bear with her for a few days.
283
00:19:34,941 --> 00:19:36,476
Okay, family.
284
00:19:36,643 --> 00:19:39,646
Home cooking!
285
00:19:41,848 --> 00:19:45,451
What is it tonight, Mom? Bee spit?
286
00:19:47,086 --> 00:19:49,455
Sunflower paste.
287
00:19:51,257 --> 00:19:53,960
I'm gonna spread mine on Styrofoam.
288
00:19:55,662 --> 00:19:58,031
That's a rice cake, Bud.
289
00:19:58,197 --> 00:20:02,468
Now, isn't this delicious?
I'm so glad we're eating healthy.
290
00:20:02,635 --> 00:20:08,474
We're cleansing ourselves,
and I do, I feel ten years younger.
291
00:20:14,581 --> 00:20:18,918
I wanna live, but not like this!
292
00:20:19,085 --> 00:20:21,020
Come on, everybody. Family meeting.
293
00:20:30,129 --> 00:20:34,601
Now, Peg, I know you think
you're responsible for killing Jim...
294
00:20:34,767 --> 00:20:37,470
...Yet you have no guilt
of squashing the life out of me...
295
00:20:37,637 --> 00:20:39,272
...But that's another meeting.
296
00:20:39,439 --> 00:20:43,109
Anyway, what I'm trying to say is,
you didn't kill Jim.
297
00:20:43,276 --> 00:20:45,645
Good health killed Jim.
298
00:20:45,812 --> 00:20:48,681
See, he purified his body so completely...
299
00:20:48,848 --> 00:20:51,017
...That when finally called upon to do so...
300
00:20:51,184 --> 00:20:55,655
...He couldn't handle the grease, sugar
and toxic waste that we call food.
301
00:20:56,789 --> 00:20:59,192
He rendered himself extinct.
302
00:20:59,359 --> 00:21:02,762
See, healthy people are like dinosaurs.
303
00:21:02,929 --> 00:21:05,531
They're not fit to survive.
304
00:21:06,899 --> 00:21:09,535
Jim's body couldn't handle
the burgers, and bonbons...
305
00:21:09,702 --> 00:21:13,006
...And pastry suckings like real Americans.
306
00:21:13,172 --> 00:21:16,776
You see, Peg, we are the truly strong.
307
00:21:16,943 --> 00:21:19,979
- You really think so, Al?
- Absolutely.
308
00:21:20,146 --> 00:21:22,382
See that cockroach over there?
309
00:21:22,548 --> 00:21:25,351
- That one?
- No, that one.
310
00:21:27,553 --> 00:21:29,889
Well, any one of them.
311
00:21:30,056 --> 00:21:33,393
You don't see them carrying
off a can of wheat germ, do you?
312
00:21:33,726 --> 00:21:35,928
"Gurm," Dad.
313
00:21:38,398 --> 00:21:40,767
Thank you, pumpkin.
314
00:21:42,168 --> 00:21:45,705
So, Peg, let's all follow the example
of our friend, the cockroach.
315
00:21:45,872 --> 00:21:48,541
They were here before man.
They'll be here after man.
316
00:21:48,708 --> 00:21:50,043
You know why?
317
00:21:50,209 --> 00:21:52,578
They eat crap.
318
00:21:54,714 --> 00:21:57,583
And I say, anything that's
good enough for the cockroach...
319
00:21:57,750 --> 00:21:59,585
...Is good enough for my family.
320
00:21:59,752 --> 00:22:02,455
Oh, Dad!
321
00:22:03,556 --> 00:22:07,126
- Oh, Al, you really do care.
- You're darn right I do.
322
00:22:07,293 --> 00:22:12,065
I don't know about the rest of you, but
I'm hungry enough to block a colon.
323
00:22:14,667 --> 00:22:17,603
Grease burgers for everyone,
on Dad! What do you say?
324
00:22:17,870 --> 00:22:20,673
- Grease! Grease!
- Let's get lots of mayonnaise.
25172
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