Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:01:21,715 --> 00:01:24,452
Peg, you were great last night.
2
00:01:24,618 --> 00:01:27,421
You did what every man dreams
his wife will do.
3
00:01:27,588 --> 00:01:31,826
You were asleep before I got home and
you were out of bed before I woke up.
4
00:01:31,992 --> 00:01:33,694
How can I ever thank you?
5
00:01:33,861 --> 00:01:36,831
You could stop eating beans before bed.
6
00:01:38,833 --> 00:01:40,568
Hey, what's all this?
7
00:01:40,734 --> 00:01:42,269
I get breakfast too?
8
00:01:43,304 --> 00:01:44,872
Peg!
9
00:01:45,039 --> 00:01:47,041
Bring it on.
10
00:01:49,910 --> 00:01:53,013
Spices too?
Do the kids know about this?
11
00:01:53,314 --> 00:01:55,416
- No.
- Good. Bring it on.
12
00:01:55,583 --> 00:01:57,318
- Al, honey...
- Yes, sweetheart?
13
00:01:57,485 --> 00:02:00,588
Before I serve you,
I have some great news.
14
00:02:00,754 --> 00:02:02,923
Oprah Winfrey finally exploded?
15
00:02:07,862 --> 00:02:10,397
No, Al, but that's so funny.
16
00:02:10,564 --> 00:02:12,666
You're just the greatest.
17
00:02:12,833 --> 00:02:15,402
Who's coming to stay with us, Peg?
18
00:02:16,570 --> 00:02:19,640
- Just my mother.
- No.
19
00:02:19,807 --> 00:02:22,776
- And my uncles Irwin and Otto.
- No, no.
20
00:02:22,943 --> 00:02:25,880
- And the Wanker triplets.
- No, no, no.
21
00:02:26,046 --> 00:02:28,682
But, Al, they're my aunts.
They're no trouble.
22
00:02:28,849 --> 00:02:32,520
Peg, God only knows how old they are,
and they sleep in the same bed.
23
00:02:33,654 --> 00:02:37,758
It's amazing, the triplets sleep in one
bed and your mother sleeps in three.
24
00:02:38,759 --> 00:02:42,630
Well, honey, they'll only stay
for an undetermined period of time.
25
00:02:43,397 --> 00:02:46,567
Peg, this is the first three-day weekend
I've had in a year.
26
00:02:46,734 --> 00:02:49,904
I won't have a good time.
You and the kids will be there.
27
00:02:50,070 --> 00:02:52,339
But not the Wanker wagon from Milwaukee.
28
00:02:52,506 --> 00:02:54,975
Peg, please, not that.
29
00:02:55,576 --> 00:02:58,579
Hondo's on this weekend.
It's some of the Duke's best work.
30
00:02:58,746 --> 00:03:01,382
It's never on TV.
I got a blank tape all ready.
31
00:03:01,549 --> 00:03:04,718
I wanna watch Hondo , Peg.
I want a clean tape of Hondo .
32
00:03:04,885 --> 00:03:07,721
No one is going to interrupt you
watching Hondo .
33
00:03:08,722 --> 00:03:11,458
Remember when they were here
last year? Shane was on.
34
00:03:11,625 --> 00:03:13,661
Just before it came on,
Otto bet Irwin...
35
00:03:13,827 --> 00:03:15,996
...He couldn't put his head through the TV.
36
00:03:16,163 --> 00:03:18,766
I didn't see Shane that year, Peg.
37
00:03:19,066 --> 00:03:23,904
Well, I know, Al, but you saw the end
from the emergency room.
38
00:03:24,071 --> 00:03:28,542
"Come back, Shane. Shane.
Goodbye, Shane." That's all I saw, Peg.
39
00:03:29,843 --> 00:03:34,114
I didn't even see the credits because
your mother lumbered in front of me.
40
00:03:34,515 --> 00:03:38,018
By the time her entire body
chugged by, it was morning.
41
00:03:39,119 --> 00:03:40,955
You should be nice to them, Al.
42
00:03:41,121 --> 00:03:43,724
After all, they're the only people
in the world...
43
00:03:43,891 --> 00:03:47,161
...Who think that what you do
is skilled labour.
44
00:03:48,028 --> 00:03:49,496
What do you say, Al?
45
00:03:49,663 --> 00:03:51,732
Can my family come for a visit?
46
00:03:51,899 --> 00:03:54,001
Because they're on their way.
47
00:03:56,003 --> 00:03:59,173
Since you went to all this trouble,
why not?
48
00:03:59,473 --> 00:04:00,941
All right, where's breakfast?
49
00:04:01,108 --> 00:04:04,211
Gee, I don't know.
I didn't cook anything.
50
00:04:06,847 --> 00:04:10,417
Well, that's the sound of the axle
hitting the road.
51
00:04:10,584 --> 00:04:12,419
It means one of two things.
52
00:04:12,586 --> 00:04:16,790
Either everybody in China just jumped
off a chair, or your family's here.
53
00:04:18,592 --> 00:04:22,096
They brought the horse trailer.
Your mom in there, Peg?
54
00:04:23,697 --> 00:04:27,434
It's the only way that she can travel, Al.
55
00:04:30,137 --> 00:04:33,741
- Otto.
- Peggy.
56
00:04:34,875 --> 00:04:38,112
Your home still looks like a filth hole.
57
00:04:40,114 --> 00:04:42,616
- Irwin
- Peg.
58
00:04:42,916 --> 00:04:45,152
You've got a beautiful home.
59
00:04:46,186 --> 00:04:50,190
And Milly, Elena, Eadie.
60
00:04:50,491 --> 00:04:53,494
Hi, Peggy. We're triplets, you know.
61
00:04:53,661 --> 00:04:56,263
You look fabulous.
62
00:04:57,464 --> 00:04:59,633
- Where's Mom?
- We'll leave her in the sun...
63
00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:02,236
...Until she heats up and gets slippery.
64
00:05:02,803 --> 00:05:06,907
That way, we won't have to
damage the truck getting her out.
65
00:05:07,675 --> 00:05:11,879
Somebody left the WD-40 at home.
66
00:05:12,046 --> 00:05:15,149
Somebody didn't put it on the list.
67
00:05:15,783 --> 00:05:19,586
How am I doing?
I'm pretty good. Thank you for asking.
68
00:05:19,753 --> 00:05:23,891
Now, listen, before the festival
of the inbreds starts...
69
00:05:24,258 --> 00:05:27,061
...I want everybody to know
Hondo will be coming on.
70
00:05:27,227 --> 00:05:30,464
During Hondo ,
there will be no belly butting...
71
00:05:30,631 --> 00:05:32,099
...No spitting for distance...
72
00:05:32,266 --> 00:05:35,703
...And no one running around
with underwear on their heads.
73
00:05:37,771 --> 00:05:40,174
We could've gone to a hotel.
74
00:05:40,708 --> 00:05:42,509
- Hey, look who's here.
- Hey.
75
00:05:42,676 --> 00:05:44,912
Uncle Irwin.
76
00:05:45,079 --> 00:05:46,914
Otto.
77
00:05:48,082 --> 00:05:50,951
Uncle Otto.
78
00:05:51,552 --> 00:05:52,986
You look great.
79
00:05:53,153 --> 00:05:56,857
And you, my darling, I could sell you.
80
00:05:57,958 --> 00:06:00,594
Let me tell you what the going rate is.
81
00:06:02,529 --> 00:06:04,631
As you can see,
Bud hasn't changed a bit.
82
00:06:04,798 --> 00:06:07,901
Same wit, same zit, same underwear.
83
00:06:08,836 --> 00:06:12,573
Well, now that we're all together,
how about a hootenanny?
84
00:06:12,806 --> 00:06:14,274
No. God, no, no!
85
00:06:14,575 --> 00:06:18,011
Wait. Wait. Wait. No hootenanny.
I forgot to put that on the list.
86
00:06:18,178 --> 00:06:20,114
Too late, Al.
87
00:06:29,356 --> 00:06:31,325
Just the boys.
88
00:06:33,160 --> 00:06:34,628
Just the girls.
89
00:06:39,099 --> 00:06:41,368
Just Al.
90
00:06:54,381 --> 00:06:56,116
Just like the old days.
91
00:06:56,283 --> 00:06:58,285
Before music.
92
00:06:59,620 --> 00:07:02,189
Are you gonna put your head
through the TV again?
93
00:07:02,356 --> 00:07:04,191
If you're good.
94
00:07:05,759 --> 00:07:07,060
Can I relax now?
95
00:07:28,782 --> 00:07:30,884
Stop. Stop.
96
00:07:31,051 --> 00:07:32,786
Please stop.
97
00:07:36,623 --> 00:07:39,927
I'm not a Wanker, and you're killing me.
98
00:07:41,795 --> 00:07:44,331
Peggy, we're famished.
99
00:07:52,239 --> 00:07:55,609
Al, how about taking us out to eat?
100
00:07:55,776 --> 00:07:59,546
What the hell. Kids, you didn't
really want to go to college, did you?
101
00:08:00,180 --> 00:08:01,949
We'd rather eat.
102
00:08:02,115 --> 00:08:03,951
If we're gonna go, we should go.
103
00:08:04,117 --> 00:08:07,688
Because once we unload your mom,
it's hard to squeeze her back in.
104
00:08:07,855 --> 00:08:10,057
She kicks like a mule.
105
00:08:10,224 --> 00:08:12,893
Will you put your head
in the salad bar again?
106
00:08:13,060 --> 00:08:15,128
If you're good.
107
00:08:18,765 --> 00:08:19,967
You know...
108
00:08:20,133 --> 00:08:23,637
...You're not good enough for our family.
109
00:08:24,171 --> 00:08:27,207
Yeah, right. I've never been up
on a morals charge.
110
00:08:28,242 --> 00:08:30,577
Nine hundred ninety-nine...
111
00:08:30,744 --> 00:08:34,147
...1000. He did it.
112
00:08:35,315 --> 00:08:37,618
Nice example for the children, Irwin.
113
00:08:37,784 --> 00:08:42,089
Why don't you show them how
to debone a cow while you're at it?
114
00:08:43,090 --> 00:08:45,626
You've always been jealous of me.
115
00:08:45,792 --> 00:08:51,098
Yes, I've always secretly wanted
to be a...beast of burden.
116
00:08:51,832 --> 00:08:54,768
Now, now.
Let's not spoil our good time.
117
00:08:54,935 --> 00:08:56,837
Now, make up, you two.
118
00:08:57,004 --> 00:08:59,907
- Blowfish.
- Squid.
119
00:09:00,374 --> 00:09:02,342
Well, that's better.
120
00:09:03,644 --> 00:09:05,612
Mom, are we going to the pony rides...
121
00:09:05,779 --> 00:09:09,750
...To see the look on the horse's face
when Uncle Irwin chooses his mount?
122
00:09:09,983 --> 00:09:12,185
No, not today, honey.
123
00:09:12,352 --> 00:09:17,324
Ever since Daddy paid for lunch
with his watch, he's been a crab apple.
124
00:09:18,058 --> 00:09:19,693
I think he's mad at us.
125
00:09:19,860 --> 00:09:21,161
Don't take it personally.
126
00:09:21,361 --> 00:09:24,765
Daddy always takes a noose with him
into the bathroom.
127
00:09:26,133 --> 00:09:27,901
Daddy's in the bathroom?
128
00:09:28,068 --> 00:09:30,938
Mom's up there taking a bath.
129
00:09:31,672 --> 00:09:34,174
Well, maybe he won't notice.
130
00:09:38,679 --> 00:09:41,415
Peg, I'm blind.
131
00:09:44,184 --> 00:09:45,452
Very funny, Al.
132
00:09:45,752 --> 00:09:49,456
No, really, Peg.
I saw your mother naked.
133
00:09:50,757 --> 00:09:55,228
Everything went black. I think my eyes
were trying to protect my heart.
134
00:09:56,930 --> 00:10:00,033
Now I'm not gonna see Hondo , Peg.
135
00:10:00,200 --> 00:10:01,468
Stop being a baby.
136
00:10:01,768 --> 00:10:03,337
It's only hysterical blindness.
137
00:10:03,503 --> 00:10:07,140
It happened to her doctor.
It wears off eventually.
138
00:10:08,041 --> 00:10:10,510
Wait. It's starting to come back.
I see shapes.
139
00:10:10,811 --> 00:10:13,814
I see...straw.
140
00:10:15,782 --> 00:10:17,317
Kelly.
141
00:10:19,186 --> 00:10:20,754
Al, we have to talk.
142
00:10:20,921 --> 00:10:24,958
Well, I'm broke and I'm blind, Peg.
What else is there to talk about?
143
00:10:25,359 --> 00:10:27,427
You haven't been very nice to my family.
144
00:10:27,728 --> 00:10:30,230
Well, neither has nature. Go bother it.
145
00:10:34,034 --> 00:10:38,939
Al, you know I don't ask much of you
because I know how limited you are...
146
00:10:39,106 --> 00:10:40,841
...But please do me a favour...
147
00:10:41,008 --> 00:10:43,510
...And just say something to them.
148
00:10:43,810 --> 00:10:45,512
Go home.
149
00:10:46,880 --> 00:10:49,549
- Does that take care of it, Peg?
- That's a nice start.
150
00:10:49,850 --> 00:10:52,252
Just show them that you care.
151
00:10:52,419 --> 00:10:55,222
Go home, and drive safely.
152
00:10:57,057 --> 00:10:58,892
Ask them how they're doing.
153
00:10:59,059 --> 00:11:00,961
For me, sweetums.
154
00:11:01,128 --> 00:11:03,397
- That's all I have to do, Peg?
- That's it.
155
00:11:03,563 --> 00:11:05,265
Otto, Irwin, how you doing?
156
00:11:05,432 --> 00:11:07,534
We're desolate.
157
00:11:08,402 --> 00:11:10,203
We'll need the triplets.
158
00:11:10,370 --> 00:11:15,242
I'll go. They sleep in Kelly's room.
Her bed often has a lot of people on it.
159
00:11:16,977 --> 00:11:19,312
Then Irwin and Otto
get to sleep on your bed...
160
00:11:19,479 --> 00:11:22,082
...With the rotting rubber sheets.
161
00:11:22,516 --> 00:11:25,952
Al, I wanna let you in
on a little family secret.
162
00:11:26,119 --> 00:11:28,255
You're the fourth triplet?
163
00:11:29,122 --> 00:11:32,325
Well, I know everybody thinks
that the family income...
164
00:11:32,492 --> 00:11:34,828
...Is derived primarily from the still.
165
00:11:35,095 --> 00:11:39,599
- And the home yoghurt business.
- Quiet, Mr. Pork-at-the-Bottom.
166
00:11:40,167 --> 00:11:43,036
- It'll catch on.
- Oh, please.
167
00:11:43,203 --> 00:11:46,206
Anyhow, the triplets add greatly
to our income.
168
00:11:46,373 --> 00:11:48,842
Otto, excuse me.
169
00:11:49,009 --> 00:11:51,945
Kelly, go upstairs.
170
00:11:53,213 --> 00:11:55,916
They sing.
They sing at carnivals, beer fests.
171
00:11:56,083 --> 00:11:59,853
Last month, they worked regular
and cleared a neat $88.50.
172
00:12:00,020 --> 00:12:01,788
Don't tell the IRS.
173
00:12:01,955 --> 00:12:05,125
Now something's happened
that's threatened the act.
174
00:12:06,293 --> 00:12:08,428
They faced the audience?
175
00:12:10,931 --> 00:12:12,532
Elena...
176
00:12:12,833 --> 00:12:14,434
...Tell him what you wanna do.
177
00:12:14,601 --> 00:12:16,436
I wanna marry.
178
00:12:17,471 --> 00:12:19,639
Somebody outside the family, right?
179
00:12:20,407 --> 00:12:22,843
Well, in Wanker county...
180
00:12:23,009 --> 00:12:26,113
...Nobody's really outside the family.
181
00:12:28,115 --> 00:12:32,986
Well, how about that boy, John,
who works at the feed store?
182
00:12:33,153 --> 00:12:34,654
Yeah.
183
00:12:35,222 --> 00:12:37,457
I guess he's family.
184
00:12:43,263 --> 00:12:45,098
Will someone listen to me, please?
185
00:12:45,265 --> 00:12:49,269
Peg, if Elena gets married,
the triplets will be torn asunder.
186
00:12:49,436 --> 00:12:53,640
And worse, if she goes
on a honeymoon, we'll lose 17 gigs.
187
00:12:53,940 --> 00:12:55,475
That's $34 and change.
188
00:12:55,642 --> 00:12:58,512
Interest will wane.
Oh, my God, the public will forget.
189
00:12:58,678 --> 00:13:02,249
It happens. Look at Glen Campbell.
190
00:13:03,183 --> 00:13:05,385
Al, don't let that happen.
191
00:13:05,552 --> 00:13:09,322
Gee, it's a little late, Peg.
Glen's career is what it is.
192
00:13:10,457 --> 00:13:14,327
Al, you're a professional man,
a shoe salesman.
193
00:13:15,695 --> 00:13:17,597
If anybody can solve this, you can.
194
00:13:17,898 --> 00:13:20,500
- Solve what?
- Should she marry or not?
195
00:13:20,667 --> 00:13:24,971
Peg, I'm not touching this.
I mean that in every sense of the word.
196
00:13:25,138 --> 00:13:27,440
If I get involved
in your family's problems...
197
00:13:27,607 --> 00:13:31,211
...I always end up missing
a good movie and I get called an idiot.
198
00:13:31,378 --> 00:13:34,314
Well, not this time, Al.
They need you.
199
00:13:34,481 --> 00:13:37,450
Look at their faces.
200
00:13:38,652 --> 00:13:41,488
All right, I'll help,
but I'm not looking at them.
201
00:13:42,155 --> 00:13:45,959
- Is someone willing to marry you?
- Yes.
202
00:13:46,126 --> 00:13:49,062
Then you have my blessing
and he has my pity.
203
00:13:49,229 --> 00:13:50,697
Do it.
204
00:13:53,300 --> 00:13:55,635
God, you're an idiot.
205
00:13:59,506 --> 00:14:02,442
You had to say something.
You couldn't just say...
206
00:14:02,609 --> 00:14:07,180
... "I don't know," like when I ask you
when you'll be done in the bathroom.
207
00:14:07,347 --> 00:14:09,416
Why did we come to you?
208
00:14:09,749 --> 00:14:13,019
They could be up there
crying their six eyes out.
209
00:14:13,320 --> 00:14:16,723
Great. On my bed.
Thank you so much, Daddy.
210
00:14:17,023 --> 00:14:19,492
That's it. I'm out of here.
211
00:14:19,659 --> 00:14:22,362
Al, you can't leave
during a family crisis.
212
00:14:22,529 --> 00:14:26,132
It's not a family. It's a lab experiment.
213
00:14:28,501 --> 00:14:30,637
Where are you going?
214
00:14:32,339 --> 00:14:36,376
I love these perfect times together.
The wine is chilled, the candles are lit.
215
00:14:36,543 --> 00:14:41,214
And we are a kiss away
from magnificent earth-shattering sex.
216
00:14:43,717 --> 00:14:47,387
Ignore it. Whoever it is will go away.
217
00:14:49,623 --> 00:14:53,460
Hey, you guys, open up.
I know you're in there.
218
00:14:56,062 --> 00:15:00,133
This is a test of wills. I am not
answering the door to that man.
219
00:15:13,613 --> 00:15:16,016
Man, what a day.
220
00:15:17,183 --> 00:15:19,452
Get me a beer, will you, Marce?
221
00:15:22,389 --> 00:15:25,425
Al, we're trying to have
a little romantic thing here.
222
00:15:25,592 --> 00:15:30,463
Well, go ahead, don't worry about me.
Marcy, you got any tuna fish in there?
223
00:15:30,630 --> 00:15:32,832
We were going upstairs,
and you interrupted.
224
00:15:33,133 --> 00:15:35,101
Then you owe me one.
225
00:15:38,638 --> 00:15:40,640
You got any pretzels?
226
00:15:43,443 --> 00:15:46,780
You might have been wondering
why my house is tilting.
227
00:15:48,181 --> 00:15:50,383
Peg's relatives are in town, six of them.
228
00:15:50,550 --> 00:15:53,053
Well, 12, counting her mother.
229
00:15:54,754 --> 00:15:57,157
We're out of pretzels.
How about some lye?
230
00:15:57,557 --> 00:15:59,025
No, thanks.
231
00:15:59,192 --> 00:16:00,827
I was ready for a great weekend.
232
00:16:01,194 --> 00:16:03,596
Did you ever just want to be alone?
233
00:16:05,198 --> 00:16:09,069
You know what I mean. I just want
to sit down and watch Hondo in peace.
234
00:16:09,235 --> 00:16:12,605
You ever try to watch something,
but your in-laws drive you crazy?
235
00:16:13,206 --> 00:16:15,542
No, Al. That's where I'm lucky.
236
00:16:15,709 --> 00:16:18,678
Marcy's family is just a blessing.
237
00:16:20,180 --> 00:16:23,783
Her mother does leave wadded-up bits
of Kleenex wherever she goes...
238
00:16:24,084 --> 00:16:29,089
...Because of that one runny eye
she has, but...that's not her fault.
239
00:16:29,789 --> 00:16:33,727
What is her fault is she's too cheap
to go to a doctor and get it fixed.
240
00:16:34,094 --> 00:16:37,330
No, she comes over here
and complains incessantly about it.
241
00:16:37,497 --> 00:16:41,768
While we try to eat. As if looking at it
doesn't tell the whole story.
242
00:16:42,369 --> 00:16:45,672
- That's enough, dear.
- You know, she'll only eat eggs.
243
00:16:45,839 --> 00:16:48,575
We could have a turkey dinner,
and she looks at it...
244
00:16:48,742 --> 00:16:51,578
...With her runny eye and says,
"What? No eggs?"
245
00:16:51,745 --> 00:16:54,180
Everybody hates her.
246
00:16:56,149 --> 00:16:57,350
Honey.
247
00:16:57,517 --> 00:17:00,553
God, she makes my skin crawl.
248
00:17:03,223 --> 00:17:06,359
What's the difference between
Steve's mom and a bowling ball?
249
00:17:06,526 --> 00:17:10,497
- What?
- A bowling ball doesn't have a beard.
250
00:17:13,266 --> 00:17:14,601
It's one hair.
251
00:17:14,768 --> 00:17:16,836
One hair does not make a beard.
252
00:17:17,137 --> 00:17:20,707
It does if it's six inches long
and V-shaped.
253
00:17:22,375 --> 00:17:25,812
Well, at least her eye
doesn't run like a toilet.
254
00:17:27,747 --> 00:17:30,350
Relax, guys. I'll get that.
255
00:17:32,485 --> 00:17:35,588
Well, let's just talk about
your Uncle Mildred.
256
00:17:35,755 --> 00:17:39,659
Can't a man be a florist
and still have some respect?
257
00:17:41,528 --> 00:17:43,296
Al, you gotta do something.
258
00:17:43,463 --> 00:17:44,798
The triplets ran away.
259
00:17:44,964 --> 00:17:47,133
Why would all three of them run away?
260
00:17:47,300 --> 00:17:50,737
Only Elena ran away, but the other two
went to keep her company.
261
00:17:50,904 --> 00:17:52,272
You gotta find her.
262
00:17:52,439 --> 00:17:55,508
Peg, I'm trying to have a quiet evening
alone with friends.
263
00:17:55,675 --> 00:17:57,811
Well, at least I have a father.
264
00:17:57,977 --> 00:18:02,182
Yeah. One who sold secrets
to the enemy during the war.
265
00:18:02,348 --> 00:18:04,317
That was never proven.
266
00:18:04,484 --> 00:18:07,287
- Al, please.
- But Hondo's coming on.
267
00:18:07,454 --> 00:18:09,155
Well, we'll tape it. Just hurry.
268
00:18:09,322 --> 00:18:11,691
It's dark, and the triplets
are out there alone.
269
00:18:11,858 --> 00:18:14,394
All right. I gotta go, guys.
270
00:18:14,561 --> 00:18:16,463
Go on, get back to your romance.
271
00:18:21,701 --> 00:18:24,704
You know why you have
such chicken legs, Marcy?
272
00:18:24,871 --> 00:18:27,640
It's because your mother
eats all those eggs.
273
00:18:29,876 --> 00:18:31,945
I'm desolate.
274
00:18:32,245 --> 00:18:34,180
Don't worry. Al will find them.
275
00:18:34,347 --> 00:18:37,417
I told him to drive around
and think like triplets.
276
00:18:37,584 --> 00:18:40,854
Now, look. Let's just do something
to take our minds off of this.
277
00:18:41,020 --> 00:18:45,391
Irwin, why don't you tell us
about your record for rooster-throwing?
278
00:18:45,725 --> 00:18:48,261
Indoors or outdoors?
279
00:18:49,028 --> 00:18:52,465
You know, Kelly has some
indoor-outdoor records of her own.
280
00:18:52,632 --> 00:18:55,602
Why, she's so good,
she's about to turn pro.
281
00:18:56,569 --> 00:18:59,506
Bud's so cute, and to think,
he'll never be bald.
282
00:18:59,672 --> 00:19:02,742
He'll always have the hair
on the palm of his hand.
283
00:19:05,678 --> 00:19:06,880
Cats and dogs.
284
00:19:07,046 --> 00:19:08,781
Cats and dogs.
285
00:19:08,948 --> 00:19:12,685
- What are you talking about?
- Nothing. I was just hungry.
286
00:19:15,288 --> 00:19:19,325
Peggy, I'm sorry this didn't turn out
to be such a good weekend for you.
287
00:19:19,492 --> 00:19:20,860
It's not so bad.
288
00:19:21,027 --> 00:19:23,563
I mean, after all, Al's out of the house...
289
00:19:23,730 --> 00:19:26,432
...Mom finally stopped sweating
from travelling...
290
00:19:26,599 --> 00:19:28,535
...And Dad is...
291
00:19:28,701 --> 00:19:30,470
Where is Dad?
292
00:19:30,637 --> 00:19:32,705
He wasn't on the list.
293
00:19:32,872 --> 00:19:36,776
Neither was your enormous rump,
but you brought that.
294
00:19:40,280 --> 00:19:42,649
Come on. Get in. Get in there.
295
00:19:43,716 --> 00:19:45,752
Al, you found them. Where were they?
296
00:19:45,919 --> 00:19:47,320
Down by the docks.
297
00:19:47,487 --> 00:19:51,457
It was just luck. We were all trying
to sign up for the merchant marine.
298
00:19:51,891 --> 00:19:55,461
Did I miss Hondo? Because that's
the only reason I came home.
299
00:19:55,628 --> 00:19:57,397
It taped.
300
00:19:57,664 --> 00:19:58,998
I get to watch Hondo .
301
00:19:59,299 --> 00:20:00,700
What about my problem?
302
00:20:01,334 --> 00:20:04,337
Your lives are meaningless
compared to Hondo .
303
00:20:04,971 --> 00:20:08,841
Now, I want silence.
Not a whinny, not a moo, not a peep.
304
00:20:10,043 --> 00:20:11,878
It's Hondo time.
305
00:20:12,045 --> 00:20:14,514
Welcome to John Wayne weekend.
306
00:20:14,681 --> 00:20:18,818
We proudly present his film Hon--
307
00:20:20,053 --> 00:20:22,622
I don't know about this.
Al's gonna be mad.
308
00:20:22,789 --> 00:20:25,658
Who cares about him?
This tape is for Peggy.
309
00:20:25,825 --> 00:20:28,728
Besides, we'll be long gone
before he sees it.
310
00:20:28,895 --> 00:20:31,764
Remember, hide the tape
so that buffoon doesn't find it.
311
00:20:31,931 --> 00:20:36,569
That's insulting. What do you think
I'm gonna do, leave it in the machine?
312
00:20:51,818 --> 00:20:55,054
You didn't hide it, did you?
313
00:20:55,922 --> 00:20:59,692
Al, why don't you do
sweet things like that?
314
00:20:59,859 --> 00:21:01,661
Okay, I'll be the one to say it.
315
00:21:01,828 --> 00:21:04,163
The Duke is dead.
Let's move on to the living.
316
00:21:04,464 --> 00:21:08,067
Have you girls come to your senses yet
about this marriage?
317
00:21:09,836 --> 00:21:12,505
I'm devastated.
318
00:21:12,939 --> 00:21:14,607
This is your fault.
319
00:21:14,774 --> 00:21:17,543
You're the one that invited
her fiancé to the house.
320
00:21:17,710 --> 00:21:19,078
We were gonna roll him.
321
00:21:19,412 --> 00:21:23,383
Look what happened.
And you never even got his wallet.
322
00:21:24,651 --> 00:21:26,586
Or did you?
323
00:21:36,029 --> 00:21:37,897
That's it. Sit down.
324
00:21:38,064 --> 00:21:41,401
Everybody sit down,
because I'm taking charge now.
325
00:21:41,567 --> 00:21:44,037
Peg, kids, go upstairs.
326
00:21:44,203 --> 00:21:46,806
Because I'm solving
everybody's problems now.
327
00:21:46,973 --> 00:21:50,209
Everybody, move close together...
328
00:21:50,510 --> 00:21:55,415
...And say... "Swiss cheese."
329
00:22:03,022 --> 00:22:04,991
Al?
330
00:22:05,725 --> 00:22:08,695
Honey, you're sweating.
And you haven't answered me yet.
331
00:22:08,861 --> 00:22:12,231
Is it okay if my family comes for a visit?
332
00:22:12,665 --> 00:22:14,534
It doesn't matter what you say.
333
00:22:14,701 --> 00:22:16,936
Besides, how bad can it be?
334
00:22:19,706 --> 00:22:22,442
We're here.
26236
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof