Original subtitles

We've read Yu Qiuyu's "The Messenger" last week

Let's read his

"Weight of Thirty Years" today

Please turn to page 431

Among the unending phone calls

I suddenly hear the voice of an old man

It's my Chinese teacher

...from high school 30 years ago Mr. Mu Ni

It was lost during the Cultural Revolution

The old man said Can you draw me another one?

For my collection when I am old?

Memories of the early sixties appear

High school life was tough but happy

The children knew by instinct

these teachers

...were under political pressure

We couldn't afford New Year greeting cards

We could only draw our own on blank paper

No matter what we wrote or what we drew

it was no better than any other student

We've already forgotten the way we used to draw

We can only use the hands of two middle-aged men

to roll up 30 years of sweetness and bitterness

to let you feel the great love that lasts

Yu Qiuyu's "The Weight of Thirty Years"

Think of the time

when you feel the weight

This is the topic for this week's assignment

Good-bye. Good-bye

Miss, what are you doing?

You haven't paid yet

I'm sorry

She's my sister. I'm paying for her

Hello. Yes, I'll pick her up later

I got some things to do now. Thanks

My name is Yip. I'm out of a job and I've 2 dogs

They would be starving without me

You ran away from home?

Rosa kicked me out

We had a fight yesterday

Ive no choice cause I was living under her roof

You can't steal stuff even if you're penniless

Do you have any friends here?

Who cares?

All I want to do is eat!

One coffee, please

(Did others say you look lovely when you're sleeping? Jin)

Don't you have anything you want to do?

Why does everyone ask me the same question?

Rosa does it too

She says I'm wasting my time

And that she'll look down on me too one day

She kicked me out because of the fight

Actually, she cherishes me

But she was too nosy and always babbling

You are different You are so soft and gentle

Sorry, I'm treating you like my students

So, tell me one of your secrets and we'll call it even?

Call it even?

I've never left school for 30 years

From high school to university to being a teacher

I just go from one school to another

That's not a secret

I used to visit a friend a lot in Macau

She was my best friend

... who became a nun at 23

It'll be hard at times

Just tell me about it no one would blame you

(Did others say you look lovely when you're sleeping? Jin)

Cry to me whenever you want to

just treat me to dinner

You can cry as loud as you want

Thank you

The company is nearby

I'll go by myself. No need to wait for me

Bye

How did you find me?

There're only a few girls' school

in this area

You have to read it

Hurry up! Come on, hurry up!

Wait for me

It's raining

Really?

Look

I don't feel it. I'm not a lamp post

That tastes sour

I'm back at Rosa's place I wanted to return your money

But then I decided to make you dinner instead

How about this Saturday?

You can bring Ting Ting along

And yes, you asked me what I wanted to do?

There are two things I wanted to do

Find a girl

and a suitable job

I don't think I have to tell anyone about this

And I'm not sure when I can succeed

I dreamt about you that night

If you want to know about my dream

you'll have to come on Saturday

Come on, hurry up

You live here alone?

Get up! Hurry, I want you to see this

Get up!

I'm very tired

Hurry up!

Hello, Hello

Rosa, who is it?

I don't know

I'm having dinner with my friends from university on Saturday

I'll bring Ting Ting along and be back a bit late

Great, go and have fun

Go and do some shopping

You haven't bought yourself anything for some time

What? Eat

When butterflies fly away

So does the heart

In the long night who shall come

To dry a face full of tears

Yearning for a little dependence

Yearning for a little love

An old acquaintance is too hard to end

Resulting in a heart full of grief

How can one endure

The guessing here, the blaming there

When I was thirteen I slept with a girl one day

She smelled so good

...and was holding me all along

Then

I put my hand inside her body

And she started to cry

That's the only thing I know how to do

I thought about it for a long time

And I'm still afraid to tell you

Because I don't want you to be angry

You only treat me as a good friend

And now I'm totally lost

I've hinted at it many times already

I had no idea Nobody ever treated me like this

What is it?

A birthmark

You were here all along

What?

You've been acting strange lately

Is it because I was always working and neglected you?

Bye-bye, Miss Wu Bye-bye

Bye-bye, see you tomorrow

Deedee. Mocha

This is Deedee and this is Mocha

They just look fierce but are actually very timid

I found them in the streets

I prepared a lot of food

Didn't you say this is Rosa's home?

Where is she?

That's what you've been worrying about?

Rosa is busy right now at her boutique

And I told her you'll be coming

Someone will bring us a cake later

Didn't I mention it's my birthday today?

You only said that you'd tell me about

about my dream

I just want to see you on my birthday

Do you always become nervous so easily?

Deedee! Mocha! Go inside!

Ting Ting is turning one, right?

Yes. She's learning to walk

She likes music a lot Especially Nirvana

"Smells like Teen Spirits"

Cool

Ming says babies can't tell the difference

But I know she can

I believe you

I recognize some words by three

My father didn't believe me. But my mother knew

She bought me a lot of books

When others were learning words in primary school

I was already reading Gu Long's novels

Classes were so boring I started to daydream

I knew nothing about Math and my schoolwork was terrible

I wanted to kiss you when I first saw you

I was afraid you'd be mad at me

That's why I've come up with so many excuses

I

I've never been so afraid

I'm married and I have a kid

But I keep thinking about you

It's ok. I won't force you

Let's eat

or I won't be able to control myself

Gosh, you guys are having a feast without me

You pretty thing! You must be Flavia, right?

You nasty girl

you dish me right away when you see pretty woman

I'd better go and feed the baby

Oh she didn't tell me you were a

Well, she's always liked older woman

You left the boutique alone what are you doing here?

What did I do? I got you a birthday cake

Today's my birthday Can you just leave me alone?

OK, fine. I'll leave you guys alone

Just don't take advantage of married women

Don't mind Rosa

This cake looks good!

But she was very angry How can you treat her like that?

You silly girl. She's not my girlfriend

Every time I bring a girl home she'll make fun of her

Don't let her bother you

Do you really like older woman?

Did I say I like you?

I've never seen anyone over 30 who's so shy

You're the second one The first one became a nun

Jin, I'm coming

Give me a hand, Jin

Were we not having loved ones? Though only once in a while

Were we not having food for our mouths? Though it's not enough

Were we not having a place to live in? Though it smells

Were we not always better than somebody else?

Tell me when you want to stop

Sorry

It's ok

She's fine

Find a job and forget about me

I don't know what I was doing just now

Just pretend that we never met

We've met and that's a fact I won't pretend

You can always re-take the exam if you work hard

I can't do this any longer

I don't want to give up either

Time to wake up! I'm making you breakfast

How come you seldom talk about your family?

I talk about them all the time

Flavia, keep this for me

Don't run around with your wedding dress

Let's give grandpa a kiss

Just like that. I proposed

And she accepted. That's the whole story

Why don't you go to Canada?

I didn't say I won't go

"Since 9 am this morning people started approaching"

"Tiananmen Square from every direction"

(70th Anniversary of May 4th)

"The parade is filled with happiness."

"As if everyone found a common language..."

"...and a common belief"

"The crowd is soaking up the atmosphere."

I don't want to work like this anymore

Please stay a little longer

How do you pay the money back?

This is not my business

I am a singer only, not a clown

Are you naive or what? It's your job

Please

Fuck off

Li Bai was more sensitive and romantic

He liked drinking

Du Fu's poems were more patriotic

...and socially oriented

Mrs. Lam

Sorry! Samantha and Muriel

I'm sorry, Miss Wu

I didn't know they were not at school

Muriel's parents came to scold us this morning

Muriel was beaten by her father and was bleeding

So I let her stay at my place

I told them to go to school everyday I did

This is Samantha I can't take your call right now

Please leave a message

Do you hear the people sing?

Singing the song of angry men?

It is the music of a people

who will not be slaves again!

When the beating of your heart

echoes the beating of the drums

There is a life about to start when tomorrow comes!

Will you join in our crusade?

Who will be strong and stand with me?

Beyond the barricade is there a world you long to see?

We all have our rights

If people lose their human rights

then what is the point of being human?

Hello? Mom?

Don't cry! Tell me what happened

It's fine

Have you found them?

Not yet

If there's no news of them by tomorrow we'll have to call the police

Flavia

What?

Where have you been? Why didn't you go to school?

You got your parents very worried

Are you alright?

Miss Wu, you must help us

I don't want to be separated from Muriel

Come over first

Go back home, it'll be alright

They scolded us

A lot of people are like us actually

What can I do?

My Dad wants me to go back to Canada

Please help us

We can't go home. My dad'll kill me

Money! Can you lend us money to run away?

I'll pay you back when I can earn some money

Stay here tonight

I'll take you home tomorrow

There're a lot of things you can't rush

You'll only hurt yourself if you're too impatient

You shouldn't do this

The students are becoming les... and running away from home

Instead of calling their parents

you let them stay at your place

They're kids but you're a grown up

You don't know what it feels like to be separated

This song is called "Never" It was written 9 years ago

The song says he never went anywhere

He could only afford meals at 8 dollars But he was happy

Have you heard this before? No

Never been to U.S..

Never been to England

Never been to Japan

Never been to Russia

I've never been to never been to C-H-I-N-A!

Never own a mobile

Never own a house

Never own much anything

Never travel far

I never fly, I never fly in the a-i-r!

They've been here last night

Shall I drive you to see Muriel's parents?

It's alright. I think they'll be fine

I

Please hold, just a second

Hello?

Samantha?

"Ladies and Gentlemen..."

"we'll soon be arriving at New Macau Marinetime Ferry Terminal"

"For your own safety..."

"please remain seated until the vassal is properly berthed"

Hello? Yes, Mrs. Lam

I'm in Macau now

Oh...they went home already?

It's ok. Bye

Hey, here

Fabulous

What are you thinking?

A lot

Like what?

Sometimes I feel that I am not myself

As if there's a mismatch

I think I've seen this image before

Actually everything has happened before

It has all been scripted

Scripted?

Some people believe they can change their lives

And they try their best to do it

But no matter what, their lives have already been scripted

Their choices and the results are all pre-destined

You should say they're all pre-meditative

Pre-meditative...right

Yeah, you lose. Punishment

Hi! Are you from Hong Kong?

Yes

My name is Carl

What's yours?

Do you really love me?

One hundred percent

How can you prove it?

Now is the proof

How long will you love me?

What does that mean?

Isn't it scripted already?

Yes. But we don't know what's in the script

Right! How smart we are!

At least we know it's all a conspiracy

Pre-meditative! Conspiracy?

In fact I'm not interested in politics

But politics is something we must deal with

As a human being, I cannot ignore it

I'm talking about resistance

Resisting the confines our society gave us

You can only do this. You cannot do that

You must go through life

...under these circumstances

There's too much prejudice here

We're only asking for the life we want to lead

Without being invaded

Without being manipulated

Sorry

Mom...how are you feeling?

Dizzy?

I'm at the studying room

Just now

Remember to turn off the pager next time

I'm going to my mother's place

Can you help me send the film to the shop?

Miss Wu

Sorry, I've given you a lot of trouble

Silly girl

I'll go in first

"Heaven-Cleansed Sands"

Orioles and swallows announce the spring

Flowers and willows reveal the truth

All things have style and rhythm

Shy and delicate;

that's prim and proper people

Flowers and willows reveal...Jin

"Raising my cup I ask the bright moon"

"Bring me my shadow and make us three"

In Li Bai's "Drinking Alone With the Moon"

"Bring me my shadow and make us three" means

Li Bai, Li Bai's shadow and the moon

No! Samantha! No

Leave me alone!

Samantha! Calm down

Monitor! Go and call an ambulance

How're the students?

2803...1234

Any calls from Flavia?

"...made the strongest speech in years..."

"...directed to the unrest of recent weeks"

Come and look! They're forcing them to leave!

"After the army took control"

"the people and the students used vehicles"

"to block the path of the army

"...at major entrances to the city"

"Some people simply sat on the road"

"and used their own bodies..."

"to stop the army vehicles from moving"

"The troops made way"

"to Tiananmen Square"

"in military vehicles and tanks..."

"...from last night to this morning"

"People gathered and stopped the army from moving"

"The army did not retreat this time"

"At 4 am..."

Pre-meditative

"the troops are arriving at Tiananmen Square"

"A lot of gun shots were heard"

"Many people were injured Some of them were killed"

"Only flare bombs were flashing People were forced..."

"...to leave under heavy arms"

Miss Wu

Muriel was sent to live with her sister

in Vancouver yesterday

It was Muriel's father

who dragged them back from Macau

Muriel

Samantha

Miss, why didn't you help us?

Why didn't you lend us money to leave?

We thank you a lot! Please go!

Leave

I'll go first, bye-bye

Bye

Thank you!

You look so thin and tired

I'm tired. I want to sleep

This place is huge. Great for dogs

I work very hard nowadays

3 shows a night Over 200 dollars an hour

As I decorate this place,

I picture how you'll look in it

I picked up the furniture from the streets

Except for Ting Ting's new crib

I didn't know you did all this

And you sing for the bar

You don't know a lot of things

In fact, I'm 23, not 18

I've been singing for 3 years before I met Rosa and quit

I don't know why I always fell for girls

I can't even help my students

I always give up when I'm half way through doing something

If I go on like this, I'll hurt a lot of people

Why do you blame yourself for everything?

You've tried your best. That's good enough

No one will blame you

I want to make love to you You can say no

But don't tell me you're not prepared

Or you need to think it through

You can just do what you want when you're with me

No one will laugh at you

I don't want to waste my time on a guessing game

Don't you know you look very beautiful now?

I know you're scared

But it's time for you to go back and face reality

I'll be here all the time

I won't kill myself And I won't suddenly become a nun

You just want to have an affair with me?

I'm just more patient than other people

I don't want you to do anything you'll regret

It's hope that got me through the hard times

Didn't you see me work hard? I bought the crib

I don't just want to sleep eat and drink with you

Everyone has to pay

for what they want in their own way

My situation is simpler

That's why I have the energy to give you confidence

I'm home

Flavia, I want a divorce

Flavia

What's going on?

Please convince her

She is not young anymore

Mom

Dad, can you calm her down?

I didn't say a word

when she was fooling around

And now she asks for a divorce

I don't need your comfort I want a divorce

Yes! I am with somebody else

I want to get out of here

Mom

What do you two want actually?

Aren't you ashamed talking like that in front of your children?

Aren't you ashamed fooling around with women

in front of Flavia in the past?

I thought you have a perfect family

Never thought your have so many secrets with them

What's wrong with you?

When someone punches you you should fight, right?

You missed your exams and your make up exams

You've been expelled

I'm the one who's being expelled not you

Patriotism is not a crime

Release the people of the pro-democracy campaign

Release Wang Dan

Release Wei Jingsheng

You are engaged in an illegal gathering

This is the last warning from the police

Please leave in peace and stop using loudspeakers

Release the people of the pro-democracy campaign

Release Wang Dan

Release Wei Jingsheng

The police have unlimited power Human rights have been betrayed

Have you ever heard of "Dog Year"?

What?

Dog Year

The years two women can be together

should be counted in dog years

Really?

It seems that you're afraid of nothing

Aren't you afraid that all this would be a waste?

Why don't you ask about Ming and me?

Not asking doesn't mean I'm not jealous

I fell in love with a singer

at the age of 17

I left home and followed her

Three months later, she ran away with a Japanese man

Leaving without a word. We stil I owed the hotel one month's rent

She even took the 1,000 dollars I had on me

You want to ask me if I hate them?

My father had a stroke because I ran away

I can't even tell who was crueler

I never care about these things

Two years ago, I met a woman

She stole all my money and kicked me out

Then I met Rosa

She was nice to me but I couldn't love her

I'd bring other girls home, including you

Then she'll be mad and kick me out

You're contradicting yourself

At least I managed to earn some money at the bar

And I met you

You'll lose a lot if you stay with me

But still you came

If we can make it quick

we can still 'make a little love' before going to the bar

Aren't you afraid I'll steal your money and run?

I want to stay here tonight

There's no class tomorrow. Let's go to Macau to see Jin

You're being silly again

When everything's settled I won't let you go even if you want to

Leaving without a word is the worst thing to do

No one would want that to happen

Thank you

(You are...)

(very beautiful today.)

Jin! Flavia! I'm back

Are you inside?

Why are you so scared?

Can anyone tell me what's happening here?

We're together

Mom, It's not like that

Just tell her

Hold it

Flavia, is that true?

Now what can you say?

We've been together for three years

Flavia, go home with me!

Aren't you just escaping from your husband's affairs?

Jin

Who do you think you are?

Flavia cannot live without me

Flavia

tell her we are serious

I can't live without her either

Come with me

If you want to leave, leave alone This is my home

Flavia, stay

Flavia

you will never see me again

Mom

Jin doesn't mean it

This is just between us

Can you stop pushing her?

Jin. I'll be back. Wait for me

Let me go! I'll be back

"Lenny Kwok founded Black Bird twenty years ago"

"This avant-garde musician uses his music..."

"to fight against those in power"

"Black Bird broke up three years ago"

"But Lenny didn't stop his fight"

"I'm old and penniless"

"But why can't I do it?"

"There must be something I can still do"

You seem troubled

You don't look happy lately

I'm worried

Something has happened to me I don't know how to tell you

Too much has happened

Forget about what happened in the past

It's good that you're back

I can't be the same anymore

Do you understand?

How can you pretend that nothing has happened?

I've changed. Can't you see?

It's because I care about you

You knew about it, right?

I can't give you what you want

I'm not the kind of woman you want

Are you in love with someone else?

Is there anything in this home

that you still care?

Of course there is. I

I'm in love with a girl

I know it

She's the one that you went to visit in Macau

I checked

It doesn't matter She's your friend in high school, right?

I saw her a few days ago She knows that you're fine

I know that

something happened to you in the past

I know about it

But you're all right now It's not a problem anymore

I've never changed

I'm a lesbian. I still am

You shouldn't check on me

And you shouldn't bother my friend

She's not the one. It's another girl

Why did you say that?

I went to see her for your own good

Don't blame yourself for what she did

She didn't become a nun because of you

I've asked her. She said

she didn't like studying anymore

And that her destiny is with Buddha

It has nothing to do with you

I did it because of you

You had boyfriends before

Don't insist that you're a lesbian

You are certainly not! Why

How did you know so much?

I was doing it for

For me?

Leave me alone

Ah Wu, here's you bun

You still remember?

The surface won't fall off

You taught me when I was young

You take this one

I'll get another one

Afraid of getting fat?

Your mother never tried this

It's been so many years

You are 30 already

Just give it to me if you don't want it

You are back

Ming

I want to talk to you

I took Ting Ting to Mom's place

She said she could take care of her tonight

There's something I really need to discuss

There was cheese and lemon flavor at the shop

I know you like both It was a hard decision

I finally picked the cheese

Isn't it beautiful?

Ming

I really want to say

It doesn't matter what I do

You won't care

You bring your daughter to meet your lover everyday

What does this mean?

In fact, today is our

You're a good man. I don't want to lie to you

You shouldn't lie to yourself either

Let's

Let's get a div

I won't let you mention that word

Never

This won't do either of us any good

Who am I? What do you take me for?

I can't compare to a woman?

As long as you don't mention divorce

you can do whatever you want

I won't interfere

I remember. Today is our anniversary

But that's no use

I'm sorry

"Over 800 staff and students"

"from the Hong Kong University"

"asked the ISU"

"and Human Rights Watch"

"to condemn the China Government for allowing military action"

"against the students"

Ting Ting, be a good girl

Ting Ting, be a good girl. Finish this

I want you to look at the title of this unit

and with another student

I would like you to tell me what you think it means

I want you to think about the following

What are the responsibilities of a journalist?

Something wrong?

How are you?

I must've gotten a cold

from fooling around with a girl naked

I just need some sleep

You fool! How can you still joke about it?

I got all the lyrics wrong this afternoon

But someone still gave me 200 dollars tips

It's a pity I didn't sing tonight

Maybe there are scouts looking for singers

Silly

Who are you?

I'm Yip

I'm Ming

Ho Yuk Ming

Hello

Is Ming at the office today?

I'm sorry

I'm not sure

Thank you. Bye

Hello? Jin

Haven't seen you for a long time, Flavia

Jin. I'll be back

It's me who can't live without you

Let me go! I'll be back

Do you want more?

Full already?

There's a lot left. Take some more

I know Ming has come to see you. I'm sorry

It doesn't matter. He came because he cares about you

It takes a lot of courage

I fell in love with a girl

But I need to know one thing

I'm afraid I may make the same mistake again

I know you would ask

I just didn't think it'll take you this long

to find your courage

It's better for me to explain it So that I can clear my mind

Everyone thought I became a nun to escape or for revenge

You must've thought the same

That's why you've been blaming yourself and can't forgive yourself

And coming to see me all the time

to see if I am living well

I was out of line that time

I moved out suddenly and had a boyfriend

I was so desperate when you left

But I knew you were doing it for your mother

She was forcing you. I didn't want to do the same thing to you

Jin, so why did you become a nun?

I moved back to the school residence afterwards

I've been trying to find you

I finally found your brother after graduation

He told me you're in Macau

When I got here, you were already a nun

I left not just because of you

I was so confused

I couldn't stay in Hong Kong any longer

I went to Paris alone that year

I found some friends who shared the same ideals

and took part in their commune

But then I discovered that ideal and reality don't mix

I'd no choice but to leave

Then I wandered Europe on my own

I've been beaten and robbed

Even

I was suffering from all kinds of diseases

Ever since I was small

I've never been able to attain inner peace

Not even when I was with you

Then I met a nun in London

She saved me

For the first time

I felt peaceful

She brought me back to Macau later

And I knew immediately this is my path

So it's all scripted?

You don't blame me?

Only you can untie your own knot

Go back. Don't come here again

I know you'll never do anything to hurt me

Where have you been these few days?

One cannot retract what one has said

I'm giving you one last chance

Do you want a divorce? Or do you want Ting Ting?

I want both

Okay. Divorce!

But I'll never give up Ting Ting

Me too

You've got that woman Isn't that enough?

You'd better leave

It was my fault

But I'll not give up

We'll go see a lawyer after you recover

Is it really worth it?

Let me show you something

There's a kiss that I've not tasted

There are candles waiting to be lit

If love is too bitter, add some sugar

It's alright even if the guitar is broken

To hug someone

To kiss someone

The best is yet to come

You can't avoid a mistake

To have doesn't mean to hold

Even if happiness can end

Pain will not last forever

If loneliness is unbearable

Then life will never be easy

There's a time for laughter and a time for tears

To hug someone

To kiss someone

The best is yet to come

Flavia is a kind of butterfly

You're not a butterfly if you can't fly

If you don't want to get involved

If you keep holding up a fist

There's no way we can hold hands

For the sake of peace and quiet

Isolate your emotion and numb your feelings

Cause it's unbearable

There'll always be uncompromising wounds

Some regrets you'll never let go

The harder you try to forget

The longer the rift will stay

(Were not we having tears in our eyes)

(through the passing of time?)

To kiss someone

The best is yet to come

The best is yet to come

Why did you throw away my slippers?

Hey! How's your fever?

Don't change the subject

I'm asking you, why did you throw away my slippers?

I accidentally lost one of them

So I simply threw out the other one as well