Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:11,315 --> 00:00:12,621
Ah.
2
00:00:15,493 --> 00:00:16,842
That's a sandwich.
3
00:00:19,541 --> 00:00:21,760
Hi, J.T.
Hey, Lilly.
What's up?
4
00:00:21,847 --> 00:00:27,592
I just wanted
you to know
5
00:00:27,679 --> 00:00:28,941
Well, thank you.
6
00:00:29,029 --> 00:00:30,465
And, because
you're my favorite,
7
00:00:30,552 --> 00:00:33,772
you don't have to get me
anything for my birthday.
8
00:00:33,859 --> 00:00:36,775
Aw, come on.
I gotta get you something.
9
00:00:36,862 --> 00:00:40,301
Well, okay.
You can get me a sticker.
10
00:00:40,388 --> 00:00:43,826
'Cause Al's getting me
something really good.
11
00:00:43,913 --> 00:00:46,220
Oh, really?
What's Al getting you?
12
00:00:46,307 --> 00:00:49,005
Barbie's Malibu
Dream House.
13
00:00:51,573 --> 00:00:53,749
Well, if Al's
getting you that,
14
00:00:53,836 --> 00:00:56,099
then, uh, your best brother's
gonna get you
15
00:00:56,186 --> 00:00:58,536
the best birthday present
you've ever seen.
16
00:00:58,623 --> 00:01:00,625
I'm registered
at Toys "R" Us.
17
00:01:02,323 --> 00:01:07,415
On my way.
18
00:01:07,502 --> 00:01:08,459
Yes!
19
00:01:11,984 --> 00:01:13,899
Oh, Karen...
20
00:01:33,354 --> 00:01:37,575
Carol, have you
seen my bathrobe?
21
00:01:37,662 --> 00:01:39,186
The white
terry-cloth one?
22
00:01:39,273 --> 00:01:41,710
Yeah. I can't
find it anywhere.
23
00:01:42,841 --> 00:01:45,453
Morning,
Mr. L, Mrs. L.
24
00:01:45,540 --> 00:01:47,368
Good morning, baby.
25
00:01:47,455 --> 00:01:50,371
Mmm. Man, I love
living right next door.
26
00:01:50,458 --> 00:01:52,068
What do you want
for breakfast,
sweetheart?
27
00:01:52,155 --> 00:01:54,114
Oh, no breakfast
for me, thanks.
I already ate.
28
00:01:55,332 --> 00:01:56,377
Oh, uh, by the way,
29
00:01:56,464 --> 00:01:58,248
you're out of eggs,
bacon, milk,
30
00:01:58,335 --> 00:02:00,772
orange juice, uh,
cottage cheese,
31
00:02:00,859 --> 00:02:04,124
fruit, and, uh,
yeah, potatoes.
32
00:02:05,995 --> 00:02:09,216
Rich,
that's my bathrobe.
33
00:02:09,303 --> 00:02:12,393
Yeah, I know.
It's nice and toasty, too.
34
00:02:12,480 --> 00:02:14,046
Had I seen that one...
35
00:02:16,745 --> 00:02:18,790
Uh, you don't mind that
I borrowed this, do you?
36
00:02:18,877 --> 00:02:20,531
Yes, I do.
Now take it off.
37
00:02:24,100 --> 00:02:25,319
I'd rather not.
38
00:02:25,406 --> 00:02:27,408
I want you
to take it off now.
39
00:02:28,887 --> 00:02:30,802
Okay,
but I'm au naturel.
40
00:02:30,889 --> 00:02:32,152
Oh, jeez.
41
00:02:33,457 --> 00:02:34,980
Keep it on.
42
00:02:35,067 --> 00:02:36,591
When you're done with it,
burn it.
43
00:02:38,897 --> 00:02:40,116
I don't want any
breakfast now, honey.
44
00:02:40,203 --> 00:02:41,422
I'm not hungry.
45
00:02:43,598 --> 00:02:45,904
Oh, by the way, Dana,
I hope you're not
busy on Saturday,
46
00:02:45,991 --> 00:02:47,036
'cause I could really
use some help
47
00:02:47,123 --> 00:02:48,777
with Lilly's
birthday party.
48
00:02:48,864 --> 00:02:50,170
What do you need
help for?
49
00:02:50,257 --> 00:02:51,910
Just let the
little brats
run around,
50
00:02:51,997 --> 00:02:56,088
stuff 'em
full of cake,
51
00:02:56,176 --> 00:02:58,569
Oh, I see. So you think
handling a birthday party
52
00:02:58,656 --> 00:03:01,006
with 16 little
six-year-olds is easy?
53
00:03:01,093 --> 00:03:03,531
Are you kidding?
54
00:03:03,618 --> 00:03:06,577
All you need to do
is let them know
who's the boss.
55
00:03:06,664 --> 00:03:10,451
Oh. Oh, I would like
to see you put your money
where your mouth is.
56
00:03:10,538 --> 00:03:13,541
Fifty bucks says
that you can't run
Lilly's birthday party
57
00:03:13,628 --> 00:03:15,586
without begging for help.
58
00:03:15,673 --> 00:03:20,809
[SCOFFS]
You're on.
59
00:03:20,896 --> 00:03:22,158
I can vouch for that.
60
00:03:24,029 --> 00:03:26,293
I'm usually the one
who does the begging.
61
00:03:28,338 --> 00:03:30,775
You know what?
I don't want
any breakfast either.
62
00:03:37,260 --> 00:03:39,088
[CHEERING ON TV]
Yes!
That's my first win.
63
00:03:39,175 --> 00:03:42,700
Hey, hey. Guys.
Ugh.
64
00:03:42,787 --> 00:03:47,401
Guys, could you
please keep it down?
65
00:03:47,488 --> 00:03:49,794
Let me save you some time.
You don't got one.
66
00:03:53,885 --> 00:03:55,539
[SPEAKS FRENCH]
67
00:03:55,626 --> 00:03:59,151
Hey, Jean-Luc.
Hey, Jean-Luc.
68
00:03:59,239 --> 00:04:01,719
Karen, I want to thank you
for lending me this tape.
69
00:04:01,806 --> 00:04:04,374
Uh, after
carefully reviewing it,
70
00:04:04,461 --> 00:04:06,333
I'm happy to say
that I was right.
71
00:04:06,420 --> 00:04:09,814
I do in fact
have buns of steel.
72
00:04:09,901 --> 00:04:14,993
Now then,
who would like to guess
what I am doing this Saturday?
73
00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:16,691
Using your butt
as a wrecking ball?
[LAUGHS]
74
00:04:18,127 --> 00:04:19,520
No.
75
00:04:19,607 --> 00:04:23,524
This Saturday,
I, Jean-Luc Rieupeyroux,
76
00:04:23,611 --> 00:04:26,701
will be cutting the hair of
somebody so incredibly famous
77
00:04:26,788 --> 00:04:28,006
that when you find out
who it is,
78
00:04:28,093 --> 00:04:29,399
you will all die.
79
00:04:29,486 --> 00:04:31,749
Who is it?
I cannot tell you.
80
00:04:31,836 --> 00:04:33,447
My client has
sworn me to secrecy.
81
00:04:33,534 --> 00:04:36,319
There is nothing
you can say or do
82
00:04:36,406 --> 00:04:39,148
that will make me
divulge the identity
83
00:04:39,235 --> 00:04:41,672
of my incredibly
famous client.
84
00:04:41,759 --> 00:04:45,067
Unless, of course, you happen
to figure out who it is
85
00:04:45,154 --> 00:04:47,417
by flipping through
this celebrity magazine
86
00:04:47,504 --> 00:04:49,941
and sneaking a peek
at his or her picture.
87
00:04:50,028 --> 00:04:51,421
In which case,
it's not my fault.
88
00:04:51,508 --> 00:04:53,771
It's just
a little thing...
89
00:04:53,858 --> 00:04:55,207
Is it Dennis Rodman?
90
00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:57,775
Nope. He has his hair cut
at 31 Flavors.
91
00:04:59,864 --> 00:05:04,216
Oh, is it
Michelle Pfeiffer?
92
00:05:04,304 --> 00:05:06,044
Get real.
She's married.
93
00:05:06,131 --> 00:05:12,529
And it's a shame too,
94
00:05:12,616 --> 00:05:14,749
Oh, look,
it's the Baywatchbabes.
95
00:05:14,836 --> 00:05:16,228
Is it one of them?
96
00:05:16,316 --> 00:05:20,537
That's not Baywatch.
97
00:05:20,624 --> 00:05:24,933
Get some glasses.
98
00:05:25,020 --> 00:05:26,456
This is somebody so big
99
00:05:26,543 --> 00:05:28,284
that they have
only one name.
100
00:05:30,895 --> 00:05:31,896
Sting.
No.
101
00:05:31,983 --> 00:05:33,071
Cher.
No.
102
00:05:33,158 --> 00:05:34,682
Gandhi?
103
00:05:37,772 --> 00:05:38,903
No.
104
00:05:38,990 --> 00:05:40,514
He's dead and he's bald.
105
00:05:42,254 --> 00:05:43,560
I give you one more hint.
106
00:05:43,647 --> 00:05:45,736
This person
has the only one name,
107
00:05:45,823 --> 00:05:47,216
and it begin
with the letter F.
108
00:05:48,652 --> 00:05:49,784
Flipper.
109
00:05:52,134 --> 00:05:54,484
Yes, that's right, Brendan.
It's Flipper.
110
00:05:54,571 --> 00:05:56,878
I'm going to cut
Flipper's hair.
111
00:05:56,965 --> 00:05:59,359
I'm going to dive
right into that tank,
112
00:05:59,446 --> 00:06:02,274
and I'm gonna put some
dippity-do on his dorsal fin.
113
00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:05,016
Yes, that's what I--
All right, this group
is never gonna figure it out.
114
00:06:05,103 --> 00:06:07,628
It's hopeless.
Unless, of course,
115
00:06:07,715 --> 00:06:10,457
you happen to show up
at my apartment this Saturday
116
00:06:10,544 --> 00:06:13,242
at exactly 2:00 p.m.
117
00:06:13,329 --> 00:06:16,245
where I will be
cutting this incredibly
famous person's hair
118
00:06:16,332 --> 00:06:18,073
who has only one name
that begin with
the letter F.
119
00:06:18,160 --> 00:06:19,248
That's Saturday, 2:00 p.m.,
120
00:06:19,335 --> 00:06:20,641
Jean-Luc Rieupeyroux,
121
00:06:20,728 --> 00:06:21,946
one word,
begins with the letter F,
122
00:06:22,033 --> 00:06:23,513
but you didn't
hear it from me.
123
00:06:25,210 --> 00:06:27,256
And people say
I can't keep a secret.
124
00:06:27,822 --> 00:06:28,866
Ha!
125
00:06:37,309 --> 00:06:38,789
[CHILDREN CLAMORING]
126
00:06:44,752 --> 00:06:45,970
Oh, hello, boys.
127
00:06:46,057 --> 00:06:47,363
Hi, Mrs. Lambert.
128
00:06:47,450 --> 00:06:49,931
Hi, Carol.
I'm sorry we're late,
129
00:06:50,018 --> 00:06:52,150
but the boys
had a little problem.
130
00:06:52,237 --> 00:06:55,545
See, Brian stuck
a peanut up his nose,
131
00:06:55,632 --> 00:06:58,592
and Ryan tried to get it out
with a Dustbuster.
132
00:07:00,376 --> 00:07:05,294
It worked.
133
00:07:05,381 --> 00:07:06,948
A marble?
[LAUGHS]
134
00:07:07,035 --> 00:07:08,515
Well, it's okay.
We're just
getting started.
135
00:07:08,602 --> 00:07:09,646
Come on in.
Come on in.
136
00:07:11,996 --> 00:07:14,869
Well, I'm gonna be
next door getting coffee
if you need me.
137
00:07:14,956 --> 00:07:16,479
Well, I
won't be here.
138
00:07:16,566 --> 00:07:20,657
My daughter Dana
thinks it's easy
139
00:07:20,744 --> 00:07:22,398
so she'll be running
this whole thing for me.
140
00:07:22,485 --> 00:07:23,965
Hi.
Hi.
141
00:07:24,052 --> 00:07:26,750
Did you ever
run a children's
birthday party before?
142
00:07:28,491 --> 00:07:30,754
[CHUCKLES] Do you get
migraine headaches?
143
00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:34,584
[LAUGHS]
You will.
144
00:07:36,064 --> 00:07:37,631
Well, Dana,
I'll be next door
145
00:07:37,718 --> 00:07:40,677
having some coffee
with Frank,
146
00:07:40,764 --> 00:07:42,636
it'll cost you 50 bucks.
[LAUGHS]
147
00:07:46,117 --> 00:07:49,817
Oh, wow.
[LAUGHS]
148
00:07:49,904 --> 00:07:51,862
[GASPS] A ball pit!
Whoo!
149
00:07:51,949 --> 00:07:53,168
Rich.
Rich! Hey!
150
00:07:53,255 --> 00:07:54,952
Rich.
151
00:07:55,039 --> 00:07:56,214
Dive! Dive!
152
00:07:56,301 --> 00:07:57,477
Rich.
153
00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:02,046
You are not a guest.
154
00:08:02,133 --> 00:08:05,093
You are here to help me
with the party.
155
00:08:05,180 --> 00:08:06,921
Do I get cake?
If you're good.
156
00:08:07,008 --> 00:08:08,966
Ooh, you're strict.
I like that.
157
00:08:09,053 --> 00:08:10,577
Get out.
158
00:08:10,664 --> 00:08:13,710
ALL: [CHANTING]
We want tokens!
We want tokens!
159
00:08:13,797 --> 00:08:15,973
DANA: Okay!
All right. All right.
160
00:08:16,060 --> 00:08:17,975
Everybody,
quiet down.
161
00:08:18,062 --> 00:08:19,411
All right, how many--
162
00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:20,935
We want...
163
00:08:22,850 --> 00:08:25,940
ALL:
We want tokens!
We want tokens!
164
00:08:26,027 --> 00:08:27,594
[BLOWS WHISTLE]
165
00:08:27,681 --> 00:08:29,944
All right,
fun time is over.
166
00:08:30,031 --> 00:08:32,076
It is time
to start the party.
167
00:08:32,163 --> 00:08:33,904
Here are the rules.
168
00:08:33,991 --> 00:08:38,082
No running,
no yelling,
no hitting.
169
00:08:38,169 --> 00:08:39,388
Lady, lady, lady.
170
00:08:39,475 --> 00:08:41,651
DANA: What?
He licked me.
171
00:08:42,870 --> 00:08:44,698
No licking.
172
00:08:44,785 --> 00:08:48,092
How are we supposed
to have ice cream
if we can't lick?
173
00:08:50,530 --> 00:08:52,575
Okay, you can
lick ice cream.
174
00:08:52,662 --> 00:08:54,403
Can we lick the pizza?
175
00:08:56,100 --> 00:08:58,320
You can lick food,
but not a person.
176
00:08:58,407 --> 00:09:01,366
What if we lick somebody
by accident?
177
00:09:02,977 --> 00:09:05,414
Can we just move on
from this whole licking thing?
178
00:09:05,501 --> 00:09:07,155
When do we
get to play?
179
00:09:07,242 --> 00:09:08,504
ALL:
Yeah!
180
00:09:08,591 --> 00:09:10,680
Hey, play on
your own time.
181
00:09:10,767 --> 00:09:12,029
This is a party.
182
00:09:12,116 --> 00:09:14,031
ALL:
Boo!
183
00:09:14,118 --> 00:09:16,599
You're ruining
my party!
184
00:09:18,079 --> 00:09:20,124
Honey, uh,
you know, uh,
185
00:09:20,211 --> 00:09:23,171
might wanna lighten up
with this whole
Nazi thing. [CHUCKLES]
186
00:09:23,258 --> 00:09:24,738
I mean, I find it
very attractive,
187
00:09:24,825 --> 00:09:27,436
but I don't think
the kids are digging it.
188
00:09:27,523 --> 00:09:29,438
Listen,
kids respect an adult
189
00:09:29,525 --> 00:09:32,833
who is not afraid
to lay down the law, okay?
190
00:09:32,920 --> 00:09:34,269
All right,
one more rule.
191
00:09:34,356 --> 00:09:36,576
No throwing food.
192
00:09:40,231 --> 00:09:41,363
[CHILDREN LAUGHING]
193
00:09:43,626 --> 00:09:47,021
Hey, kids.
I'm Possum Dave.
194
00:09:47,108 --> 00:09:48,413
Obviously.
195
00:09:48,500 --> 00:09:50,546
For the next
five minutes,
196
00:09:50,633 --> 00:09:52,548
all games are free!
197
00:09:52,635 --> 00:09:54,855
[ALL CHEER]
198
00:09:54,942 --> 00:09:56,639
Wait a minute!
[BLOWS WHISTLE]
199
00:09:56,726 --> 00:09:59,163
Get back here! Hey!
I'm in charge here.
200
00:09:59,250 --> 00:10:00,774
Listen to me!
201
00:10:00,861 --> 00:10:02,427
[CHILDREN CLAMORING]
202
00:10:09,478 --> 00:10:11,611
DANA:
All right, stop it.
203
00:10:11,698 --> 00:10:13,264
Stop it.
That's enough.
204
00:10:13,351 --> 00:10:15,919
All right.
All right, enough.
Enough now. Serious.
205
00:10:16,006 --> 00:10:17,529
Rich!
Rich, help me.
206
00:10:17,617 --> 00:10:20,315
Get me out of here.
207
00:10:20,402 --> 00:10:22,534
Back. Back--
ooh. Away!
208
00:10:22,622 --> 00:10:23,623
Away! Hey!
209
00:10:23,710 --> 00:10:26,582
[GROANING]
Hey! Hey!
210
00:10:26,669 --> 00:10:28,628
Look! Look!
Free tokens.
211
00:10:28,715 --> 00:10:30,107
Free! Free!
212
00:10:30,194 --> 00:10:32,283
Away! Away!
213
00:10:32,370 --> 00:10:34,416
What? Oh, honey,
let me help you.
214
00:10:34,503 --> 00:10:35,896
Let me help you, honey.
215
00:10:35,983 --> 00:10:37,811
I got you. I got you.
216
00:10:37,898 --> 00:10:40,204
All right. Okay.
217
00:10:40,291 --> 00:10:41,771
You okay? You--
218
00:10:45,166 --> 00:10:48,343
I'll--I'll accept that
as an accident.
219
00:10:54,566 --> 00:10:55,872
Where were you?
220
00:10:55,959 --> 00:10:59,049
Oh. [CHUCKLES]
221
00:10:59,136 --> 00:11:00,747
and they both
missed target.
222
00:11:00,834 --> 00:11:05,752
[LAUGHS]
223
00:11:05,839 --> 00:11:07,623
Great. So I'm out here
fighting for my life,
224
00:11:07,710 --> 00:11:09,364
and you're worried
about your socks?
225
00:11:09,451 --> 00:11:11,061
Honey, they're just
having a little fun.
226
00:11:11,148 --> 00:11:13,281
Besides,
I thought you said
babysitting wasn't hard.
227
00:11:13,368 --> 00:11:14,935
Well, maybe
it wouldn't be
228
00:11:15,022 --> 00:11:16,284
if you were
out here helping me
229
00:11:16,371 --> 00:11:17,851
instead of playing
with the kids.
230
00:11:17,938 --> 00:11:19,679
Lady!
231
00:11:19,766 --> 00:11:21,855
More tokens.
More tokens.
More tokens...
232
00:11:21,942 --> 00:11:23,987
Be quiet. I'm having
a conversation, okay?
233
00:11:24,074 --> 00:11:26,990
You know, maybe the kids
wouldn't be so wild
234
00:11:27,077 --> 00:11:29,166
if you were a little bit
more nurturing.
235
00:11:29,253 --> 00:11:32,256
What do you mean
I'm not nurturing?
236
00:11:32,343 --> 00:11:34,389
Oh, pipe down now,
you little twerp.
237
00:11:37,871 --> 00:11:39,089
Oh, how cute.
238
00:11:39,176 --> 00:11:40,917
A couple of kids
are playing tug of war...
239
00:11:41,004 --> 00:11:42,397
With your jacket.
240
00:11:43,050 --> 00:11:44,268
Hey.
241
00:11:44,355 --> 00:11:46,531
Put that down.
Drop it!
242
00:11:49,360 --> 00:11:51,623
Ryan, where are
you going?
243
00:11:51,711 --> 00:11:55,453
I want my mommy.
That whistle lady's mean.
244
00:11:55,540 --> 00:12:00,067
The whistle lady?
245
00:12:00,154 --> 00:12:02,417
No, she's yelling
at the guy I peed on.
246
00:12:04,375 --> 00:12:05,594
You peed on a guy?
247
00:12:06,769 --> 00:12:09,206
Frank,
we can't have kids
248
00:12:09,293 --> 00:12:10,294
Let's go in there
and take over.
249
00:12:10,381 --> 00:12:12,775
Uh, honey,
wait a minute.
250
00:12:12,862 --> 00:12:15,909
If Dana doesn't know
that Ryan's out here,
251
00:12:15,996 --> 00:12:17,867
we could let her
sweat a little.
252
00:12:21,175 --> 00:12:23,873
How about I take you
inside to your mom
253
00:12:23,960 --> 00:12:25,483
and we'll let
Mrs. Lambert
254
00:12:25,570 --> 00:12:28,443
go in there and torture
the mean whistle lady?
255
00:12:28,530 --> 00:12:30,053
Yeah.
Yeah.
256
00:12:31,185 --> 00:12:33,013
Yeah.
Yeah!
257
00:12:37,713 --> 00:12:38,932
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
258
00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:41,891
Hey, Jean-Luc.
259
00:12:41,978 --> 00:12:43,110
Hey.
260
00:12:43,197 --> 00:12:44,807
Oh. Oh.
261
00:12:44,894 --> 00:12:47,549
[SPEAKS FRENCH]
262
00:12:47,636 --> 00:12:51,422
waiting for a famous
celebrity client
at exactly 2:00 p.m.?
263
00:12:51,509 --> 00:12:53,120
Uh, you told us.
264
00:12:53,207 --> 00:12:54,991
Well, never mind.
265
00:12:55,078 --> 00:12:56,993
Since you're here,
you may as well meet
266
00:12:57,080 --> 00:12:59,256
my incredibly famous
celebrity client
267
00:12:59,343 --> 00:13:02,216
who has only one name
which begin with
the letter F.
268
00:13:02,303 --> 00:13:04,653
Well, J.T. thinks
he knows who the
mystery client is.
269
00:13:04,740 --> 00:13:07,134
It's Frederique, right?
The underwear model, right?
270
00:13:07,221 --> 00:13:08,875
Come on, say it's her.
Please, please, please.
271
00:13:10,572 --> 00:13:12,313
He's a little worked up
over this.
272
00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:14,837
That's why I decided
to come along.
273
00:13:14,924 --> 00:13:17,013
Sam, you know I'm
totally devoted to you,
274
00:13:17,100 --> 00:13:19,973
but the human body
is God's finest work of art.
275
00:13:20,060 --> 00:13:22,453
I mean, can't I
enjoy a masterpiece
when I see one?
276
00:13:22,540 --> 00:13:25,282
Uh, J.T., did I mention that
this masterpiece is a guy?
277
00:13:25,369 --> 00:13:27,197
That's sick.
Let's get out of here.
Come on, Sam.
278
00:13:27,284 --> 00:13:29,417
Oh, wait a minute.
279
00:13:29,504 --> 00:13:32,159
Jean-Luc, is your client
a good-looking guy?
280
00:13:32,246 --> 00:13:34,814
Well, he has the body
of a Greek statue.
281
00:13:34,901 --> 00:13:37,599
Well, hey, J.T.
has the body of a statue.
282
00:13:37,686 --> 00:13:38,687
Buddha.
283
00:13:40,341 --> 00:13:42,038
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
284
00:13:42,125 --> 00:13:44,301
Okay, everybody
just act naturally.
285
00:13:46,564 --> 00:13:48,175
If it's Famous Amos,
286
00:13:48,262 --> 00:13:49,785
I hope
he brought cookies.
287
00:13:59,969 --> 00:14:02,493
Oh, my God.
It's Fabio.
288
00:14:02,580 --> 00:14:04,321
Bonjour, mon ami.
Hey, bonjour,Jean-Luc.
289
00:14:04,408 --> 00:14:05,975
[BOTH SPEAK ITALIAN]
290
00:14:06,062 --> 00:14:08,369
[SIGHS]
Isn't he gorgeous?
291
00:14:08,456 --> 00:14:10,937
Well, to tell you the truth,
I'm really not that impressed.
292
00:14:11,024 --> 00:14:13,940
Can you please
take my jacket?
293
00:14:14,027 --> 00:14:15,550
Sure.
294
00:14:15,637 --> 00:14:19,032
Okay.
Now I'm impressed.
295
00:14:19,119 --> 00:14:21,295
Fabio,
I'd like you to meet
some of my friend.
296
00:14:21,382 --> 00:14:23,775
Uh, somehow they found out
that you were
going to be here,
297
00:14:23,863 --> 00:14:26,778
and they just couldn't,
uh, pass up the opportunity
298
00:14:26,866 --> 00:14:29,651
to meet a world-famous
celebrity like yourself.
299
00:14:29,738 --> 00:14:31,218
Well,
who could blame them?
300
00:14:33,829 --> 00:14:35,309
It's a pleasure...
301
00:14:36,701 --> 00:14:38,007
To meet...
302
00:14:39,269 --> 00:14:40,401
You.
303
00:14:43,360 --> 00:14:45,188
Uh, Fabio,
would you like
to sit in a chair?
304
00:14:45,275 --> 00:14:46,363
Sure.
Why not?
305
00:14:49,627 --> 00:14:53,893
I don't get it.
306
00:14:53,980 --> 00:14:55,503
A body and a job.
307
00:14:57,679 --> 00:14:58,941
My God.
308
00:14:59,028 --> 00:15:01,944
That is one
massive Italian.
309
00:15:08,733 --> 00:15:12,824
Uh, I have over 500
of your novels, Mr. Fabio.
310
00:15:14,870 --> 00:15:16,480
To tell you the truth,
I didn't write
all those novels.
311
00:15:16,567 --> 00:15:18,352
I just posed
for the covers.
312
00:15:18,439 --> 00:15:20,267
Oh, that's okay.
I don't read them.
313
00:15:20,354 --> 00:15:22,530
I just look at
your picture. [LAUGHS]
314
00:15:22,617 --> 00:15:24,662
Don't worry, honey.
I still make the money.
315
00:15:26,838 --> 00:15:28,753
Okay, I'm ready
to begin.
316
00:15:28,840 --> 00:15:30,886
Everybody,
stand back.
317
00:15:30,973 --> 00:15:33,845
I, Jean-Luc Rieupeyroux,
318
00:15:33,933 --> 00:15:35,499
am about to
get a vision.
319
00:15:36,718 --> 00:15:39,373
Yes,
I'm seeing the vision.
320
00:15:39,460 --> 00:15:41,636
I'm seeing
the perfection,
321
00:15:41,723 --> 00:15:44,291
and I know exactly
how to achieve it.
322
00:15:44,378 --> 00:15:47,772
Get ready for the total
hair-styling experience
323
00:15:47,859 --> 00:15:50,688
and complete
grooming makeover.
324
00:16:00,481 --> 00:16:02,091
Yes! Voila.
325
00:16:02,178 --> 00:16:05,529
Fini!You are perfect once again.
326
00:16:05,616 --> 00:16:07,096
See you again
in six months.
327
00:16:09,055 --> 00:16:10,230
I want
that hair.
328
00:16:10,317 --> 00:16:11,318
No,
it's mine!
329
00:16:11,405 --> 00:16:15,975
Not if I
can help it.
330
00:16:16,062 --> 00:16:19,369
I have a package of my hair
just for this occasion.
331
00:16:19,456 --> 00:16:20,980
For each of you.
332
00:16:21,937 --> 00:16:22,938
Here we go.
333
00:16:23,025 --> 00:16:24,984
[GASPING]
334
00:16:27,116 --> 00:16:29,205
So how do you like
your new haircut?
335
00:16:29,292 --> 00:16:31,077
Jean-Luc,
you are a genius.
336
00:16:31,164 --> 00:16:32,556
No, come on.
You are a genius.
337
00:16:32,643 --> 00:16:33,688
No, no, no, you are.
338
00:16:33,775 --> 00:16:36,996
Come on!
You are a genius.
339
00:16:37,083 --> 00:16:38,606
Okay, I'm a genius.
340
00:16:39,650 --> 00:16:40,825
And I'm Fabio.
341
00:16:45,569 --> 00:16:46,614
KIDS: [CHANTING]
We want cake!
We want cake!
342
00:16:46,701 --> 00:16:49,704
DANA:
Okay. Okay.
343
00:16:49,791 --> 00:16:51,271
All right.
Okay, all right.
344
00:16:51,358 --> 00:16:57,625
Everybody, sit down,
345
00:16:57,712 --> 00:16:59,496
Hey, I caught
a couple more of 'em.
346
00:16:59,583 --> 00:17:01,020
Found 'em breaking into
the token machine
347
00:17:01,107 --> 00:17:02,325
with a screwdriver.
348
00:17:03,761 --> 00:17:06,025
Ooh, that was
a good one, too.
349
00:17:07,983 --> 00:17:10,333
Hi, Dana.
How's it going?
350
00:17:10,420 --> 00:17:12,901
Great.
It's going just great.
Right, kids?
351
00:17:12,988 --> 00:17:16,209
KIDS: Boo!
352
00:17:16,296 --> 00:17:18,341
Gee, Rich.
Maybe we should
take a head count
353
00:17:18,428 --> 00:17:20,343
so we know how many pieces
of cake to cut, huh?
354
00:17:20,430 --> 00:17:22,084
You got it.
Two, four, six, eight,
355
00:17:22,171 --> 00:17:25,522
ten, 12, 14, 15 kids.
356
00:17:25,609 --> 00:17:27,611
No. No, that's impossible.
357
00:17:27,698 --> 00:17:29,222
We're supposed
to have 16.
358
00:17:30,832 --> 00:17:32,355
God, Rich.
I think we lost a kid.
359
00:17:32,442 --> 00:17:34,662
You lost a kid?
360
00:17:34,749 --> 00:17:37,056
Well, we still got
15 out of 16.
361
00:17:37,143 --> 00:17:38,840
That's good enough
for an A, isn't it?
362
00:17:38,927 --> 00:17:40,885
Rich, these are kids.
Not a spelling test.
363
00:17:40,972 --> 00:17:44,759
We... We need
all of 'em.
364
00:17:44,846 --> 00:17:48,023
ALL: [CHANTING]
We want cake!
We want cake!
365
00:17:48,850 --> 00:17:50,808
Ryan! Ryan!
366
00:17:50,895 --> 00:17:52,897
Whichever one you are,
where are you?
367
00:17:52,984 --> 00:17:55,813
Gee, Dana, you sound
kind of frazzled.
368
00:17:55,900 --> 00:18:00,818
Frazzled?
I'm going insane.
369
00:18:00,905 --> 00:18:04,083
God, I wish somebody could
just make 'em be quiet.
370
00:18:04,170 --> 00:18:08,217
Hey, five tokens
to the kid who can
keep quiet the longest.
371
00:18:10,611 --> 00:18:13,440
Ryan. Ryan.
372
00:18:13,527 --> 00:18:15,355
It's time
for the cake.
373
00:18:15,442 --> 00:18:16,878
Come out.
374
00:18:18,271 --> 00:18:19,707
Mom,
I need your help.
375
00:18:19,794 --> 00:18:21,491
I'm begging.
376
00:18:21,578 --> 00:18:23,537
Begging?
You owe me 50 bucks.
377
00:18:23,624 --> 00:18:25,669
Who cares about the bet?
I lost a kid.
378
00:18:25,756 --> 00:18:27,628
Oh, you mean
Ryan, the other twin?
379
00:18:27,715 --> 00:18:28,846
Yes.
380
00:18:28,933 --> 00:18:30,587
Oh, he's okay.
381
00:18:30,674 --> 00:18:37,333
We found him outside,
382
00:18:37,420 --> 00:18:42,338
You mean you knew
he was safe
383
00:18:42,425 --> 00:18:44,601
Yeah.
It was really fun.
384
00:18:46,386 --> 00:18:47,474
I can't believe that.
385
00:18:47,561 --> 00:18:48,779
How could you
do that to me?
386
00:18:48,866 --> 00:18:51,173
Oh. Oh, excuse me
just a minute.
387
00:18:51,260 --> 00:18:53,001
Weren't you the one
who said,
388
00:18:53,088 --> 00:18:56,657
"Why do you need help,
389
00:18:56,744 --> 00:18:59,225
"all you need to do
is let 'em know who's boss"?
390
00:18:59,312 --> 00:19:02,271
Okay, fine,
so I underestimated
how hard it is
391
00:19:02,358 --> 00:19:03,838
to be in charge
of something like this.
392
00:19:03,925 --> 00:19:05,318
Well, everyone does,
you know.
393
00:19:05,405 --> 00:19:09,322
Unless you've
had a kid,
394
00:19:09,409 --> 00:19:11,454
Mothers get no credit
for this work,
395
00:19:11,541 --> 00:19:14,240
and it is the single
most important job
396
00:19:14,327 --> 00:19:15,676
we have as adults.
397
00:19:17,156 --> 00:19:18,592
You're right.
398
00:19:18,679 --> 00:19:19,941
I don't give you
enough credit.
399
00:19:20,028 --> 00:19:21,725
I mean,
with seven of us,
400
00:19:21,812 --> 00:19:24,119
I have no idea how
you can handle that.
401
00:19:28,341 --> 00:19:30,256
You'll do just fine
when you have your own kids.
402
00:19:32,519 --> 00:19:36,914
Why?
403
00:19:37,001 --> 00:19:41,745
Oh, don't do that.
404
00:19:41,832 --> 00:19:45,096
Okay, kids, it's time
to sing the birthday song.
405
00:19:45,184 --> 00:19:48,839
ALL:
♪ Happy birthday to you
406
00:19:48,926 --> 00:19:52,191
♪ Happy birthday to you
407
00:19:52,278 --> 00:19:56,151
♪ Happy birthday, dear Lilly
408
00:19:56,238 --> 00:19:59,589
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
409
00:19:59,676 --> 00:20:01,417
Okay, Lilly,
make a wish.
410
00:20:01,504 --> 00:20:04,464
I wish Dana
would lighten up.
411
00:20:04,551 --> 00:20:06,379
[ALL CHEER]
412
00:20:12,123 --> 00:20:17,999
"And so...
413
00:20:18,086 --> 00:20:21,089
"they gaze into
each other's eyes,
414
00:20:23,265 --> 00:20:26,529
"knowing that the fire
of their passion
415
00:20:28,662 --> 00:20:31,447
"would burn on
throughout their lives...
416
00:20:32,666 --> 00:20:36,191
"Forever... And ever.
417
00:20:37,627 --> 00:20:39,890
"And ever."
418
00:20:40,674 --> 00:20:42,241
That's the end.
419
00:20:43,416 --> 00:20:45,592
That was so romantic.
420
00:20:45,679 --> 00:20:46,984
Read it again.
421
00:20:49,073 --> 00:20:50,814
I'm sorry, ladies,
but I have to go
422
00:20:50,901 --> 00:20:53,077
or I'll miss my flight.
423
00:20:53,164 --> 00:20:56,690
Oh, can you wait
just a minute?
424
00:20:56,777 --> 00:20:57,778
Sure.
Okay.
425
00:20:59,519 --> 00:21:01,390
I don't have
any of your books.
426
00:21:01,477 --> 00:21:03,566
I'll just go get my
pillow for you to sign.
427
00:21:03,653 --> 00:21:05,133
Okay.
428
00:21:16,579 --> 00:21:18,277
Hi. I'm Fabio.
429
00:21:25,675 --> 00:21:28,330
Oh, my God.
I'm hallucinating.
430
00:21:28,417 --> 00:21:31,333
No, you're not.
Honestly, I am Fabio.
431
00:21:31,420 --> 00:21:34,815
[SCOFFS] Yeah, right,
and I'm Aretha Franklin,
queen of soul.
29941
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
