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- Synced and corrected by Firefly -
- www.addic7ed.com -
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[GROWLING]
3
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[GRUNTS]
4
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Whoa!
5
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Oh! We gotta stop this.
6
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If Gotham's destroyed we gotta move
7
00:00:30,097 --> 00:00:32,723
and there's no way I'm
living' in Metropolis.
8
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So do your plant control thingie
9
00:00:34,385 --> 00:00:35,733
and put an end to this.
10
00:00:35,735 --> 00:00:36,826
Yeah, you know what,
11
00:00:36,828 --> 00:00:38,506
you're really taking
the romance out of it
12
00:00:38,506 --> 00:00:40,440
when you just call it my
"plant control thingie".
13
00:00:40,440 --> 00:00:41,672
[BALLOON MAN SCREAMING]
14
00:00:41,674 --> 00:00:43,909
Hey buddy. Stop.
15
00:00:43,911 --> 00:00:45,077
[BALLOON MAN WHIMPERING]
16
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- [ROARING]
- Argh!
17
00:00:47,384 --> 00:00:50,315
[GROWLS AND ROARS]
18
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[NERVOUSLY] I... I can't control them.
19
00:00:52,330 --> 00:00:53,985
I've... They... They've mutated!
20
00:00:53,987 --> 00:00:55,781
Maybe they'll respond to heavy scolding?
21
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[YELLS] You are being
very disrespectful!
22
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- [GROWLING]
- Run.
23
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[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
24
00:01:06,867 --> 00:01:08,166
Look at that,
25
00:01:08,168 --> 00:01:10,758
Ivy has procured us a tree army.
26
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She can't control the plants.
27
00:01:12,250 --> 00:01:14,240
Yes, Harley. Hurrah!
28
00:01:14,242 --> 00:01:16,707
Uh, I don't think those
trees are on our side.
29
00:01:16,709 --> 00:01:17,776
Run!
30
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[ALL SCREAMING]
31
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[GROWLING AND ROARING]
32
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- [WHOOSHING]
- Argh!
33
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This is my favorite top. Dick!
34
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[GROANS] Ow!
35
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[GRUNTS]
36
00:01:32,126 --> 00:01:33,892
Sweet Roosevelt's ghost!
37
00:01:33,894 --> 00:01:35,326
Acupuncture works.
38
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I'm healed, baby!
39
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- [WHOOSHES]
- [GROANS]
40
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Ah. Easy come, easy go.
41
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Argh!
42
00:01:46,307 --> 00:01:48,907
Oh, I am slain!
43
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- Clayface, no!
- [GRUNTS]
44
00:01:51,510 --> 00:01:52,580
[GROANS]
45
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If thou be merciful... [GASPS]
46
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Open the tomb...
47
00:01:56,650 --> 00:01:58,650
And lay with...
48
00:01:58,652 --> 00:01:59,984
[WEAKLY] Juliet.
49
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[GROANING]
50
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[HARLEY GASPS]
51
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[EXCITEDLY] And scene!
52
00:02:07,894 --> 00:02:09,163
- [GRUNTS]
- [POISON IVY] Oh, my god!
53
00:02:09,163 --> 00:02:10,364
[DR. PSYCHO] That deserves a suicide.
54
00:02:10,364 --> 00:02:12,163
[TREE MONSTERS GROWLING]
55
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[PEOPLE SCREAMING IN TERROR]
56
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Sweet Jesus,
57
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the park's filled with murderous plants.
58
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[PEOPLE SCREAMING]
59
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Thank God we canceled Jazz Fest.
60
00:02:20,840 --> 00:02:23,375
The way I see it,
there's only one option.
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[LOUDLY] Bomb the damn place
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00:02:24,711 --> 00:02:25,776
to kingdom come.
63
00:02:25,778 --> 00:02:26,913
Jim...
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00:02:26,913 --> 00:02:28,048
there are innocent people there.
65
00:02:28,048 --> 00:02:29,183
Well, it's not our fault
66
00:02:29,183 --> 00:02:30,683
if they don't check their social and see
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Jazz Fest was canceled.
68
00:02:31,784 --> 00:02:33,168
You can't bomb the park.
69
00:02:33,170 --> 00:02:34,495
Of course we can. We have tanks.
70
00:02:34,497 --> 00:02:35,687
The taxpayers paid for 'em.
71
00:02:35,689 --> 00:02:37,955
Yep, Jazz Fest may have been canceled,
72
00:02:37,957 --> 00:02:40,358
but we can still give
the people a show, buddy.
73
00:02:40,360 --> 00:02:42,161
I need you to be
surgical about this, Jim.
74
00:02:42,163 --> 00:02:43,429
Be prudent.
75
00:02:43,431 --> 00:02:45,332
- I can't hold your hand...
- Why not?
76
00:02:45,332 --> 00:02:47,470
Because Scarecrow's
crop-dusting fear toxin
77
00:02:47,472 --> 00:02:48,900
around the perimeter of Gotham,
78
00:02:48,902 --> 00:02:51,146
forcing thousands of innocent
people towards the park.
79
00:02:51,148 --> 00:02:54,215
- That potato sack son of a bitch.
- I'll handle him.
80
00:02:54,217 --> 00:02:56,354
The Justice League is en route
to help us with the tree problem.
81
00:02:56,354 --> 00:02:59,745
- I just need you to evacuate the park.
- Got it.
82
00:02:59,747 --> 00:03:01,082
You know what would be a good way
83
00:03:01,084 --> 00:03:02,257
to get the people out of the park?
84
00:03:02,259 --> 00:03:03,658
No tanks.
85
00:03:03,660 --> 00:03:05,259
- [SIRENS WAILING]
- [SIGHS]
86
00:03:05,261 --> 00:03:08,630
- [THUDS]
- [ROARING]
87
00:03:08,632 --> 00:03:09,898
So, Commissioner Gordon,
88
00:03:09,900 --> 00:03:11,733
this situation seems dire.
89
00:03:11,735 --> 00:03:13,769
- Are we finally going to see those tanks
- _
90
00:03:13,771 --> 00:03:15,037
our taxpayers voted on?
91
00:03:15,039 --> 00:03:16,640
No. That wouldn't be...
92
00:03:16,640 --> 00:03:17,640
[MOCKINGLY] prudent.
93
00:03:17,640 --> 00:03:19,608
Oh, boo. Why?
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00:03:19,610 --> 00:03:20,844
To minimize loss of life
95
00:03:20,844 --> 00:03:22,644
because some jazz hippies
96
00:03:22,646 --> 00:03:24,446
can't read a goddamn email!
97
00:03:24,448 --> 00:03:26,381
Well, in this reporter's opinion
98
00:03:26,383 --> 00:03:27,416
it looks like we are...
99
00:03:27,418 --> 00:03:29,286
So fucked!
100
00:03:29,288 --> 00:03:31,051
- [ROARING]
- [SCREAMS]
101
00:03:31,053 --> 00:03:32,588
[GRUNTS]
102
00:03:32,590 --> 00:03:34,356
[BOTH GRUNTING]
103
00:03:34,358 --> 00:03:38,834
[GROWLING AND ROARING]
104
00:03:38,836 --> 00:03:40,828
Hey. Nice save, Jerk-off League!
105
00:03:40,830 --> 00:03:43,880
That's not our name at all.
106
00:03:48,472 --> 00:03:51,305
[TREE MONSTERS GROANING]
107
00:03:51,307 --> 00:03:55,411
[ROARING]
108
00:03:55,413 --> 00:03:57,949
Ugh, how does she pull
off those clunky bracelets?
109
00:03:57,949 --> 00:03:59,261
I know, it's like annoying.
110
00:03:59,263 --> 00:04:00,850
Well, hey you know, thanks for the help.
111
00:04:00,850 --> 00:04:02,517
Harley and crew will handle the rest.
112
00:04:02,519 --> 00:04:04,989
Um... Hey! Why am I tied up?
113
00:04:04,989 --> 00:04:06,723
Because you and your troublesome horde
114
00:04:06,723 --> 00:04:08,496
are behind this anarchy.
115
00:04:08,496 --> 00:04:10,525
What? Bullshit!
116
00:04:10,527 --> 00:04:11,660
Harley Quinn,
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00:04:11,662 --> 00:04:13,728
I declare you and your allies,
118
00:04:13,730 --> 00:04:16,263
including that elderly war criminal,
119
00:04:16,265 --> 00:04:17,832
to be banished to...
120
00:04:17,834 --> 00:04:19,066
[HESITANTLY] You wanna say it
121
00:04:19,068 --> 00:04:20,134
since it's your thing?
122
00:04:20,136 --> 00:04:21,244
Thanks, Diana.
123
00:04:21,246 --> 00:04:22,747
[LOUDLY] To the Phantom Zone!
124
00:04:22,749 --> 00:04:24,882
What? You gotta be shittin' me.
125
00:04:27,951 --> 00:04:30,386
[SY] Uh-oh, oh, I'm seeing' the light.
126
00:04:30,388 --> 00:04:31,721
Oh, my God!
127
00:04:31,723 --> 00:04:33,490
I didn't think I'd make it to Heaven
128
00:04:33,492 --> 00:04:34,891
after what I did in...
129
00:04:34,891 --> 00:04:36,124
Uh... Eh, well,
130
00:04:36,126 --> 00:04:37,526
everywhere, I guess.
131
00:04:37,528 --> 00:04:38,597
Mostly Asia.
132
00:04:38,597 --> 00:04:39,995
We didn't do any of this.
133
00:04:39,997 --> 00:04:41,129
They're tree monsters.
134
00:04:41,131 --> 00:04:42,491
She controls the trees.
135
00:04:42,493 --> 00:04:43,817
So...
136
00:04:43,819 --> 00:04:45,603
[HESITANTLY] Uh... You
want to say it this time?
137
00:04:45,603 --> 00:04:47,439
Sure. You're all going...
138
00:04:47,439 --> 00:04:48,973
- [BOTH CHOKING]
- ... to the Phantom Zone.
139
00:04:48,973 --> 00:04:50,807
[BOTH GRUNTING]
140
00:04:50,809 --> 00:04:53,944
- Now, Kal-El!
- [DEVICE BEEPS]
141
00:04:53,946 --> 00:04:57,514
[ALL SCREAMING]
142
00:04:57,516 --> 00:04:58,648
Harley!
143
00:04:58,650 --> 00:05:01,184
Make me tell the truth.
144
00:05:01,186 --> 00:05:02,907
Poison Ivy, did you do this?
145
00:05:02,909 --> 00:05:04,097
We didn't do it.
146
00:05:04,099 --> 00:05:05,799
We aren't responsible
for the tree monsters.
147
00:05:05,801 --> 00:05:07,158
I secretly watch NASCAR.
148
00:05:07,158 --> 00:05:08,243
I take long showers.
149
00:05:08,245 --> 00:05:10,492
I think paper straws are
stupid and get too soggy.
150
00:05:10,494 --> 00:05:12,093
I was excited for Jazz Fest.
151
00:05:12,095 --> 00:05:13,331
[MOANS PAINFULLY]
152
00:05:13,331 --> 00:05:16,499
Fine. I was very excited for Jazz Fest.
153
00:05:16,501 --> 00:05:20,168
[WIND BLOWING]
154
00:05:20,170 --> 00:05:21,471
- [ALL SCREAMING]
- [THUDDING]
155
00:05:21,473 --> 00:05:22,805
Oh, God!
156
00:05:22,807 --> 00:05:24,107
Someone take this off me.
157
00:05:24,109 --> 00:05:26,576
If you're not responsible for this,
158
00:05:26,578 --> 00:05:28,877
who is?
159
00:05:28,879 --> 00:05:32,081
Oh, no!
160
00:05:32,083 --> 00:05:34,416
[GRUNTING]
161
00:05:34,418 --> 00:05:37,353
[SCREAMS] No!
162
00:05:37,355 --> 00:05:39,088
[GRUNTS]
163
00:05:39,090 --> 00:05:40,288
[STRAINING]
164
00:05:40,290 --> 00:05:41,391
[QUEEN OF FABLES] Thirty years ago
165
00:05:41,393 --> 00:05:43,291
you cosplaying assholes
166
00:05:43,293 --> 00:05:44,661
trapped me in a book.
167
00:05:44,663 --> 00:05:48,064
Time to return the favor.
168
00:05:48,066 --> 00:05:49,399
[GRUNTS]
169
00:05:49,401 --> 00:05:51,199
[SCREAMS] You'll never get away with...
170
00:05:51,201 --> 00:05:52,836
Shut the hell up, sexy.
171
00:05:52,838 --> 00:05:54,470
- [GRUNTS]
- [SCREAMING]
172
00:05:54,472 --> 00:05:55,572
[QUEEN OF FABLES LAUGHS]
173
00:05:55,574 --> 00:05:56,740
Word of advice,
174
00:05:56,742 --> 00:05:59,440
do not smell Rapunzel's hair.
175
00:05:59,442 --> 00:06:01,677
Ain't no shower in that tower.
176
00:06:01,679 --> 00:06:03,547
[HARLEY] Queen! Oh, You
really saved the day.
177
00:06:03,547 --> 00:06:05,383
I guess not killin' ya
worked out pretty well.
178
00:06:05,383 --> 00:06:06,684
Not really.
179
00:06:06,684 --> 00:06:08,451
Quick question. Can any of you fly?
180
00:06:08,453 --> 00:06:10,052
- In a plane.
- Every night in my dreams.
181
00:06:10,054 --> 00:06:12,221
- [SY] Ha! outta diesel.
- No. I'm basically a rock.
182
00:06:12,223 --> 00:06:16,057
Good.
183
00:06:16,059 --> 00:06:19,161
[ALL SCREAMING]
184
00:06:19,163 --> 00:06:22,064
[LAUGHING MANIACALLY]
185
00:06:22,066 --> 00:06:25,134
Mama's having a productive day.
186
00:06:25,136 --> 00:06:28,170
[CACKLES]
187
00:06:28,172 --> 00:06:32,408
[ALL SCREAMING]
188
00:06:32,410 --> 00:06:35,545
[HARLEY] Ow!
189
00:06:35,547 --> 00:06:37,314
Holy mackerel, we're up high!
190
00:06:37,316 --> 00:06:40,083
I've never been this far
above sea level before.
191
00:06:40,085 --> 00:06:41,985
All right. Calm down,
calm down, don't panic.
192
00:06:41,987 --> 00:06:44,088
Here's a surefire trick to combat,
193
00:06:44,088 --> 00:06:45,223
uh, way-up-aphobia.
194
00:06:45,223 --> 00:06:48,391
Pick a spot in the
horizon and stare at it.
195
00:06:48,393 --> 00:06:49,795
Oh, wait, that's for sea sickness.
196
00:06:49,795 --> 00:06:51,093
What are we, on a cloud now?
197
00:06:51,095 --> 00:06:52,862
[SIGHS] Yeah. Looks
like Fables' teamed up
198
00:06:52,864 --> 00:06:54,199
with the Legion to kill us.
199
00:06:54,199 --> 00:06:55,734
God, she turned out to be a bad friend.
200
00:06:55,734 --> 00:06:57,403
Hey-hey, I'm already bored up here.
201
00:06:57,403 --> 00:06:59,603
Do your stupid plant thing
and get us the hell down. Okay?
202
00:06:59,603 --> 00:07:01,805
You know I can't control
fairy tale plants,
203
00:07:01,807 --> 00:07:02,872
you balding gremlin.
204
00:07:02,874 --> 00:07:04,740
How would I have know that?
205
00:07:04,742 --> 00:07:06,576
When would that have come up?
206
00:07:06,578 --> 00:07:09,079
Actually, Fables may
have done us a solid.
207
00:07:09,081 --> 00:07:13,516
Seems much safer up
here than down there.
208
00:07:13,518 --> 00:07:16,254
[GIANT] Fee fi fo...
209
00:07:16,254 --> 00:07:17,254
Ah, fuck me.
210
00:07:17,254 --> 00:07:18,557
[GIANT] ... fum.
211
00:07:18,557 --> 00:07:21,826
I smell the blood of small human scum.
212
00:07:21,826 --> 00:07:23,660
Okay, we need a way down. Now.
213
00:07:23,662 --> 00:07:25,461
I say we make like Jack,
214
00:07:25,463 --> 00:07:26,896
climb down the beanstalk,
215
00:07:26,898 --> 00:07:28,665
chop it down, kill the giant,
216
00:07:28,667 --> 00:07:30,268
French kiss Rapunzel. Done.
217
00:07:30,268 --> 00:07:32,836
keep your creepy bionic
hands off Rapunzel.
218
00:07:32,838 --> 00:07:34,854
[GIANT] I'll grind your bones
219
00:07:34,856 --> 00:07:37,107
to bake my bread!
220
00:07:37,109 --> 00:07:39,608
Come on! How the hell are
we gettin' off this thing?
221
00:07:39,610 --> 00:07:42,110
I know just what we need.
222
00:07:42,112 --> 00:07:43,545
An idea.
223
00:07:43,547 --> 00:07:45,314
Yes, who's got one?
224
00:07:45,316 --> 00:07:47,168
[SIGHS] Okay.
225
00:07:47,170 --> 00:07:48,418
I know who can help us.
226
00:07:48,420 --> 00:07:49,685
Sy, give me your phone.
227
00:07:49,687 --> 00:07:52,021
'Ey, wait, wait, wait, not so fast.
228
00:07:52,023 --> 00:07:53,589
- Give it.
- Is it a local call?
229
00:07:53,591 --> 00:07:57,225
Just fuckin' hand it over.
230
00:07:57,227 --> 00:07:59,295
[SNIFFS] Ugh!
231
00:07:59,297 --> 00:08:00,463
What do you think, Bill-doe?
232
00:08:00,465 --> 00:08:01,490
Any thoughts on this kite?
233
00:08:01,492 --> 00:08:03,450
I'm kinda stuck on
this last piece, like...
234
00:08:03,452 --> 00:08:05,703
Oh, check it out, my
girlfriend's calling.
235
00:08:05,703 --> 00:08:07,239
What up, babe?
236
00:08:07,239 --> 00:08:08,773
[WHISPERS] It's Ivy. It's my girlfriend.
237
00:08:08,773 --> 00:08:10,376
Yeah, no, I'm just designing a kite.
238
00:08:10,376 --> 00:08:12,509
Yeah, trying to put my own
little spin-a-roonie on it.
239
00:08:12,509 --> 00:08:14,911
Wha... What's that?
240
00:08:14,913 --> 00:08:16,713
I'll head right over!
241
00:08:16,715 --> 00:08:19,682
I... I love you.
242
00:08:19,684 --> 00:08:20,985
She didn't say it back.
243
00:08:20,985 --> 00:08:22,319
It's probably just bad reception.
244
00:08:22,321 --> 00:08:24,122
Plus, she probably didn't want to say it
245
00:08:24,122 --> 00:08:26,555
in front of her work friends.
246
00:08:26,557 --> 00:08:30,192
[GRUNTING]
247
00:08:30,194 --> 00:08:32,697
Wait, you have Kite
Man's number memorized?
248
00:08:32,697 --> 00:08:33,732
[LOUD FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]
249
00:08:33,732 --> 00:08:36,182
Oh, no, the giant's here.
250
00:08:41,606 --> 00:08:42,606
[ROARING]
251
00:08:42,607 --> 00:08:44,440
[ALL SCREAMING]
252
00:08:44,442 --> 00:08:45,741
[YELLS]
253
00:08:45,743 --> 00:08:46,867
[YELPS]
254
00:08:46,869 --> 00:08:48,202
You didn't... You didn't
answer my question.
255
00:08:48,204 --> 00:08:49,295
How do you know his number?
256
00:08:49,297 --> 00:08:50,320
Uh...
257
00:08:50,322 --> 00:08:52,615
How big do you think
that giant's dick is?
258
00:08:52,617 --> 00:08:53,850
I do want to talk about that,
259
00:08:53,852 --> 00:08:55,116
but answer my question.
260
00:08:55,118 --> 00:08:57,385
[STOMPING]
261
00:08:57,387 --> 00:09:00,325
[GIANT YELLS]
262
00:09:00,327 --> 00:09:03,949
Fine. I'm... I'm dating Kite Man.
263
00:09:03,951 --> 00:09:05,794
What? [GRUNTS]
264
00:09:05,796 --> 00:09:08,129
[SCREAMING]
265
00:09:08,131 --> 00:09:09,631
Ha! Got ya!
266
00:09:09,633 --> 00:09:11,636
You're dating Kite Man?
267
00:09:11,636 --> 00:09:14,068
Why?
268
00:09:14,070 --> 00:09:15,303
Uh...
269
00:09:15,305 --> 00:09:17,309
You... You love him?
270
00:09:17,309 --> 00:09:19,775
I haven't said, like,
"I love you" to him,
271
00:09:19,777 --> 00:09:22,745
but, yeah, I love him a little.
272
00:09:22,747 --> 00:09:24,582
How do we not know about this?
273
00:09:24,582 --> 00:09:25,615
[GIANT GRUNTS]
274
00:09:25,617 --> 00:09:27,019
Because you never asked.
275
00:09:27,019 --> 00:09:28,085
- I mean, It's like...
- [CACKLING]
276
00:09:28,085 --> 00:09:29,351
... if it's not about you...
277
00:09:29,353 --> 00:09:30,454
you're not interested.
278
00:09:30,454 --> 00:09:31,656
I wasn't even trying very hard
279
00:09:31,656 --> 00:09:32,656
to keep it a secret.
280
00:09:32,656 --> 00:09:33,755
I kept coming home,
281
00:09:33,757 --> 00:09:34,923
reeking of kite,
282
00:09:34,925 --> 00:09:36,259
leaves in my hair.
283
00:09:36,261 --> 00:09:38,061
Didn't you ever think that was weird?
284
00:09:38,063 --> 00:09:40,763
You seriously didn't know, Quinn?
285
00:09:40,765 --> 00:09:43,999
Show of hands for
everybody who knew. Bingo.
286
00:09:44,001 --> 00:09:45,404
[CLAYFACE SCREAMS]
287
00:09:45,404 --> 00:09:46,737
- [SY] Oy vey!
- [KING SHARK] Watch your hand!
288
00:09:46,737 --> 00:09:49,504
[LAUGHS MALICIOUSLY]
289
00:09:49,506 --> 00:09:53,300
[GROANS]
290
00:09:53,302 --> 00:09:54,344
Ho!
291
00:09:54,344 --> 00:09:55,577
[ALL] Kite Man!
292
00:09:55,579 --> 00:09:56,637
Oh, yeah.
293
00:09:56,639 --> 00:09:58,183
I tossed a hot sauce packet at him
294
00:09:58,183 --> 00:09:59,916
that I found inside my pants.
295
00:09:59,918 --> 00:10:01,317
It's Sriracha.
296
00:10:01,319 --> 00:10:02,350
[ALL SCREAMING]
297
00:10:02,352 --> 00:10:03,352
Our fave, babe.
298
00:10:03,353 --> 00:10:04,723
[SCREAMING CONTINUES]
299
00:10:04,723 --> 00:10:05,723
I gotcha.
300
00:10:05,723 --> 00:10:09,658
[ALL SCREAMING]
301
00:10:09,660 --> 00:10:12,528
- Ah!
- [KITE MAN] Ha!
302
00:10:12,530 --> 00:10:16,231
[SCREAMING]
303
00:10:16,233 --> 00:10:19,368
[SCREAMING]
304
00:10:19,370 --> 00:10:22,408
[SCREAMING]
305
00:10:22,410 --> 00:10:25,408
[SCREAMING]
306
00:10:25,410 --> 00:10:26,875
- [THUDS]
- [GRUNTS]
307
00:10:26,877 --> 00:10:28,144
Thanks, babe.
308
00:10:28,146 --> 00:10:30,413
I never got the kite thing until now,
309
00:10:30,415 --> 00:10:33,184
but it is quite majestic.
310
00:10:33,184 --> 00:10:35,386
[KITE MAN] Uh. Might want
to hold on tight there, gang.
311
00:10:35,386 --> 00:10:38,721
Looks like your crew's
packing a few extra lbs.
312
00:10:38,723 --> 00:10:39,855
Not you, babe.
313
00:10:39,857 --> 00:10:42,857
You look bangin'. As per ushe.
314
00:10:46,264 --> 00:10:50,432
[YELLING]
315
00:10:50,434 --> 00:10:52,469
- [GROANS]
- [GRUNTS]
316
00:10:52,469 --> 00:10:53,469
Ugh!
317
00:10:53,469 --> 00:10:54,770
[MOANING PASSIONATELY]
318
00:10:54,772 --> 00:10:56,005
Thanks for the ride, babe.
319
00:10:56,007 --> 00:10:57,974
Babe, anytime.
320
00:10:57,976 --> 00:10:59,842
- Ugh!
- Oh, sick.
321
00:10:59,844 --> 00:11:01,510
I can't get hold of the Justice League.
322
00:11:01,512 --> 00:11:02,812
But I found Scarecrow... wait.
323
00:11:02,814 --> 00:11:04,014
Are you wearing a helmet?
324
00:11:04,016 --> 00:11:05,682
Are you on a tank?
325
00:11:05,684 --> 00:11:06,783
[SCOFFS] No,
326
00:11:06,785 --> 00:11:09,385
I'm... riding my skateboard.
327
00:11:09,387 --> 00:11:11,955
- What?
- The situation's gotten more dire, all right?
328
00:11:11,957 --> 00:11:15,591
Desperate times call for... tanks.
329
00:11:15,593 --> 00:11:19,998
- [LAUGHING]
- Argh!
330
00:11:20,000 --> 00:11:22,264
Men... and Cheryl,
331
00:11:22,266 --> 00:11:25,634
let's remind these trees
what they're good for,
332
00:11:25,636 --> 00:11:27,403
letting a dog piss all over...
333
00:11:27,405 --> 00:11:29,272
[KNOCKING]
334
00:11:29,274 --> 00:11:31,475
Hey, Gordo. Love the helmet.
335
00:11:31,477 --> 00:11:34,910
But I think it'd look better on me.
336
00:11:34,912 --> 00:11:37,612
[MUFFLED MUMBLING]
337
00:11:43,521 --> 00:11:45,989
Anyone have a Class
B commercial license?
338
00:11:45,991 --> 00:11:48,725
Dude! You look so good
popping out of a tank.
339
00:11:48,727 --> 00:11:51,948
It's mostly the helmet. [CHUCKLES]
340
00:11:51,950 --> 00:11:53,765
[HARLEY] Scarecrow and
those Legion of Doom Dicks
341
00:11:53,765 --> 00:11:55,298
were behind this from the start.
342
00:11:55,300 --> 00:11:57,734
And screw Fables for joining 'em.
343
00:11:57,736 --> 00:11:59,905
I hereby tender my resignation.
344
00:11:59,905 --> 00:12:01,971
I hope it's effective immediately
345
00:12:01,973 --> 00:12:04,473
because I am squished.
346
00:12:08,112 --> 00:12:09,413
[CLAYFACE] Good Lord!
347
00:12:09,415 --> 00:12:11,681
This tank shoots invisible missiles.
348
00:12:11,683 --> 00:12:13,082
What miraculous tech.
349
00:12:13,084 --> 00:12:14,716
I didn't press the button.
350
00:12:14,718 --> 00:12:16,919
Someone else just blew it up.
351
00:12:16,921 --> 00:12:18,122
But who?
352
00:12:22,293 --> 00:12:23,793
[RATTLING]
353
00:12:32,002 --> 00:12:34,336
[CACKLING]
354
00:12:34,338 --> 00:12:35,404
What?
355
00:12:35,406 --> 00:12:37,545
The Joker actually
built that stupid tower
356
00:12:37,547 --> 00:12:39,575
to take over Gotham?
357
00:12:39,577 --> 00:12:41,078
Although, he did use my idea
358
00:12:41,078 --> 00:12:42,232
to have it pop out of the ground.
359
00:12:42,234 --> 00:12:44,458
Um... Yay?
360
00:12:44,460 --> 00:12:46,549
Citizens of Gotham,
361
00:12:46,551 --> 00:12:49,418
the Legion of Doom used
to stand for something.
362
00:12:49,420 --> 00:12:51,955
Now, it's not standing at all!
363
00:12:51,957 --> 00:12:54,113
[LAUGHS MANIACALLY]
364
00:12:54,115 --> 00:12:55,253
You can't see them,
365
00:12:55,255 --> 00:12:57,210
but that joke killed
with the camera crew,
366
00:12:57,212 --> 00:12:59,162
and they're the toughest
audience to make laugh
367
00:12:59,164 --> 00:13:01,197
and they see this shit everyday. Anyway.
368
00:13:01,199 --> 00:13:03,832
The Legion of Doom used
to stand for something,
369
00:13:03,834 --> 00:13:05,402
top tier evil.
370
00:13:05,404 --> 00:13:08,604
But now, they'll let in any, say...
371
00:13:08,606 --> 00:13:09,938
second-rate clown
372
00:13:09,940 --> 00:13:11,541
with a cheap dye job.
373
00:13:11,543 --> 00:13:13,176
- [LAUGHS MANIACALLY]
- How dare he.
374
00:13:13,178 --> 00:13:15,979
I go to a very high-end salon weekly.
375
00:13:15,981 --> 00:13:17,580
Harls, I've seen you neck deep
376
00:13:17,582 --> 00:13:18,847
in six different bottles
377
00:13:18,849 --> 00:13:21,053
of that bullshit you
buy at the drugstore.
378
00:13:21,053 --> 00:13:22,253
Damn it, I forgot you were here.
379
00:13:22,253 --> 00:13:24,187
The Legion is no more.
380
00:13:24,189 --> 00:13:26,489
Gotham, you deserve better,
381
00:13:26,491 --> 00:13:27,823
someone with vision,
382
00:13:27,825 --> 00:13:29,761
someone who speaks French,
383
00:13:29,761 --> 00:13:32,828
moi, of course.
384
00:13:32,830 --> 00:13:37,633
[LAUGHS MANIACALLY]
385
00:13:37,635 --> 00:13:38,934
I'm calling it!
386
00:13:38,936 --> 00:13:41,671
RIP, Gotham City,
387
00:13:41,673 --> 00:13:44,639
time of death...
388
00:13:44,641 --> 00:13:46,076
Right now!
389
00:13:46,078 --> 00:13:48,811
[SIREN BLARING IN DISTANCE]
390
00:13:48,813 --> 00:13:50,514
[LAUGHING MANIACALLY]
391
00:13:50,516 --> 00:13:52,349
Oh. He's going down.
392
00:13:52,351 --> 00:13:53,950
All right, everybody back in the tank.
393
00:13:53,952 --> 00:13:56,352
If you need to pee, now's your chance.
394
00:13:56,354 --> 00:13:59,054
[LOUDLY] I want you
war-crazed lunatics...
395
00:13:59,056 --> 00:14:00,423
[SOFTLY] ... and Cheryl,
396
00:14:00,425 --> 00:14:02,490
[LOUDLY] to unleash
holy hell on that tower.
397
00:14:02,492 --> 00:14:04,561
Unleashing, sir.
398
00:14:04,563 --> 00:14:06,629
- [GROWLING]
- [TANK COP SCREAMING]
399
00:14:06,631 --> 00:14:09,032
[SCREAMING]
400
00:14:09,034 --> 00:14:10,533
What the fuck!
401
00:14:10,535 --> 00:14:14,037
[ALL SCREAMING]
402
00:14:14,039 --> 00:14:15,605
Uh. I hate to be a downer,
403
00:14:15,607 --> 00:14:18,874
but we are completely
and utterly screwed.
404
00:14:18,876 --> 00:14:20,976
Oh, I wore that well.
405
00:14:20,978 --> 00:14:23,178
Hmm. Maybe I don't hate being a downer.
406
00:14:23,180 --> 00:14:25,950
Ooh, maybe I shouldn't
feel so much pressure
407
00:14:25,950 --> 00:14:28,402
to put a positive spin on things.
408
00:14:30,222 --> 00:14:32,022
Well, I think we fucked up
409
00:14:32,022 --> 00:14:34,657
everyone that needed it.
410
00:14:34,659 --> 00:14:35,825
[SPITS]
411
00:14:35,827 --> 00:14:37,092
What is this weak-ass drink?
412
00:14:37,094 --> 00:14:38,494
This one of your jokes?
413
00:14:38,496 --> 00:14:39,629
It's 1:30,
414
00:14:39,631 --> 00:14:42,367
I'm not getting fucked
up on a Wednesday.
415
00:14:42,367 --> 00:14:43,401
[YELLS] And by the way...
416
00:14:43,401 --> 00:14:45,033
why is Harley still alive?
417
00:14:45,035 --> 00:14:46,470
You said you took care of them!
418
00:14:46,472 --> 00:14:48,270
I threw 'em on top of a beanstalk.
419
00:14:48,272 --> 00:14:50,005
"Took care of" means kill them.
420
00:14:50,007 --> 00:14:51,941
Not beanstalk them!
421
00:14:51,943 --> 00:14:53,208
I was trying to kill them,
422
00:14:53,210 --> 00:14:55,312
just in a fun and cinematic way.
423
00:14:55,314 --> 00:14:57,513
That big-dicked giant kills everything.
424
00:14:57,515 --> 00:14:58,780
Apparently not!
425
00:14:58,782 --> 00:14:59,883
You joined me,
426
00:14:59,883 --> 00:15:01,283
because you said you wanted to be
427
00:15:01,285 --> 00:15:02,920
on the winning team.
428
00:15:02,920 --> 00:15:06,089
Well, we can't win until they're dead.
429
00:15:06,091 --> 00:15:09,426
Fine. I'll kill 'em normal.
430
00:15:09,428 --> 00:15:11,260
- With the Justice League missing
- _
431
00:15:11,262 --> 00:15:13,363
and no sign of Batman,
432
00:15:13,365 --> 00:15:17,499
we're all just pawns in the
hands of a murderous psychopath.
433
00:15:17,501 --> 00:15:20,269
[INAUDIBLE]
434
00:15:20,271 --> 00:15:23,440
And what better hands to be in?
435
00:15:23,442 --> 00:15:25,408
They're firm, they're strong,
436
00:15:25,410 --> 00:15:28,047
and they're covered
in soft, soft gloves.
437
00:15:28,049 --> 00:15:29,837
In other news,
438
00:15:29,839 --> 00:15:34,417
are hideous scars on your
face actually awesome?
439
00:15:34,419 --> 00:15:35,619
And yet, they're only
440
00:15:35,621 --> 00:15:37,820
the second most evil news network.
441
00:15:37,822 --> 00:15:39,022
Right guys?
442
00:15:39,024 --> 00:15:40,391
- Anyone?
- We gotta get those trees
443
00:15:40,391 --> 00:15:41,959
away from the tower
so we can stop Joker.
444
00:15:41,959 --> 00:15:44,717
Perhaps, I could take on
the role of an arborist
445
00:15:44,719 --> 00:15:47,897
and slowly trim them back to death.
446
00:15:47,899 --> 00:15:49,331
It could take years,
447
00:15:49,333 --> 00:15:51,801
but this green-thumbed plant enthusiast
448
00:15:51,803 --> 00:15:53,436
is up to the challenge!
449
00:15:53,438 --> 00:15:54,738
Yeah, okay, you know what,
450
00:15:54,740 --> 00:15:56,938
I'm gonna go and draw the trees away
451
00:15:56,940 --> 00:15:58,307
from the tower.
452
00:15:58,309 --> 00:16:00,710
Ive, be, uh, you know, careful and shit.
453
00:16:00,712 --> 00:16:02,879
You too. And shit.
454
00:16:02,881 --> 00:16:03,946
Come on, babe.
455
00:16:03,948 --> 00:16:07,115
Let's go mow that lawn.
456
00:16:07,117 --> 00:16:09,085
So this guy really does it for you?
457
00:16:09,087 --> 00:16:10,452
You know, one-on-one...
458
00:16:10,454 --> 00:16:11,953
[HESITANTLY] he... He...
459
00:16:11,955 --> 00:16:14,057
Uh... [SIGHS]
460
00:16:14,059 --> 00:16:16,458
Uh, fuck you, Psycho! I don't know.
461
00:16:16,460 --> 00:16:19,962
[SOFT HAPPY MUSIC PLAYS]
462
00:16:19,964 --> 00:16:21,264
[PANTING]
463
00:16:21,266 --> 00:16:22,499
Are you okay?
464
00:16:22,501 --> 00:16:24,799
Kite Man doesn't run a lot. [GASPING]
465
00:16:24,801 --> 00:16:26,437
Uses kites, mostly. Phew!
466
00:16:26,439 --> 00:16:28,703
This water made the plants huge,
467
00:16:28,705 --> 00:16:30,275
and I am part plant.
468
00:16:30,275 --> 00:16:32,030
So, it could have the same effect on me.
469
00:16:32,032 --> 00:16:34,376
I know I can't stop you from doing this,
470
00:16:34,378 --> 00:16:35,644
so in case it kills you
471
00:16:35,646 --> 00:16:37,281
or gives you really bad diarrhea...
472
00:16:37,281 --> 00:16:38,950
- Um...
- ... I couldn't live with myself,
473
00:16:38,952 --> 00:16:41,218
- if I didn't ask you...
- Wait, what are you...
474
00:16:41,218 --> 00:16:42,318
... this special question.
475
00:16:42,320 --> 00:16:43,620
[POISON IVY] Oh, dear.
476
00:16:43,622 --> 00:16:47,323
Will you do me the honor of making me...
477
00:16:47,325 --> 00:16:48,758
- Mr...
- There's no box.
478
00:16:48,760 --> 00:16:50,592
... Poison Ivy?
479
00:16:50,594 --> 00:16:53,797
Um... Uh...
480
00:16:53,799 --> 00:16:55,331
[STUTTERING] You know what, let's...
481
00:16:55,333 --> 00:16:56,499
Let's circle back on this?
482
00:16:56,501 --> 00:16:58,634
Just maybe after the apocalypse?
483
00:16:58,636 --> 00:16:59,869
Right?
484
00:16:59,871 --> 00:17:01,138
[KISSES]
485
00:17:01,140 --> 00:17:02,839
[SIGHS SOFTLY]
486
00:17:02,841 --> 00:17:04,639
Not a no.
487
00:17:04,641 --> 00:17:06,292
Hell, yeah!
488
00:17:27,845 --> 00:17:29,334
All right, guys.
489
00:17:29,336 --> 00:17:30,960
Look, I know none of this is your fault.
490
00:17:30,962 --> 00:17:33,017
And I'm sorry for what I'm about to do.
491
00:17:33,019 --> 00:17:35,138
I promise I'll plant,
like, so many of you
492
00:17:35,140 --> 00:17:36,238
once this is over. Okay?
493
00:17:36,240 --> 00:17:37,740
[GROWLING]
494
00:17:42,612 --> 00:17:45,215
[GROANS]
495
00:17:45,217 --> 00:17:46,416
[GRUNTS]
496
00:17:46,418 --> 00:17:48,551
[TREE MONSTER GRUNTS]
497
00:17:48,553 --> 00:17:49,886
Sorry.
498
00:17:49,888 --> 00:17:52,054
[TREE MONSTER GROANS]
499
00:17:52,056 --> 00:17:54,415
[ROARS]
500
00:17:54,417 --> 00:17:55,526
Oh!
501
00:17:55,526 --> 00:17:57,260
God, it was just a kid.
502
00:17:57,262 --> 00:18:00,862
[TREE MONSTERS GROWLING]
503
00:18:04,869 --> 00:18:09,472
[HARLEY] Come on!
504
00:18:09,474 --> 00:18:12,542
Got time for one last bedtime story?
505
00:18:12,544 --> 00:18:14,511
Why would you work for Joker?
506
00:18:14,513 --> 00:18:15,945
'Cause unlike you,
507
00:18:15,947 --> 00:18:18,313
he's a real evil son of a bitch.
508
00:18:18,315 --> 00:18:20,449
Well, I'm evil enough
to bash your head in.
509
00:18:20,451 --> 00:18:22,852
Tell that shit to my grandma.
510
00:18:25,524 --> 00:18:29,091
My, what big eyes she has!
511
00:18:29,093 --> 00:18:31,329
[ROARING]
512
00:18:31,329 --> 00:18:32,329
Wait a minute!
513
00:18:32,330 --> 00:18:34,363
That's no grandmother!
514
00:18:34,365 --> 00:18:38,133
[GROWLING]
515
00:18:38,135 --> 00:18:40,168
[GRUNTS] Sorry!
516
00:18:40,170 --> 00:18:42,071
Ah, sorry!
517
00:18:42,073 --> 00:18:43,273
[GROANS]
518
00:18:48,513 --> 00:18:49,612
[TREE MONSTER SCREECHES]
519
00:18:49,614 --> 00:18:51,214
Ah, sorry for that too!
520
00:18:51,216 --> 00:18:55,784
[YELPING]
521
00:18:55,786 --> 00:18:57,052
I have an idea!
522
00:18:57,054 --> 00:18:59,088
[ROARS]
523
00:18:59,090 --> 00:19:00,122
[GASPS]
524
00:19:00,124 --> 00:19:01,357
Oy! Bubby,
525
00:19:01,359 --> 00:19:02,757
it is I,
526
00:19:02,759 --> 00:19:03,926
Grandfather Wolf.
527
00:19:03,928 --> 00:19:04,960
Okay.
528
00:19:04,962 --> 00:19:06,698
First, that's a male wolf...
529
00:19:06,698 --> 00:19:08,279
- [GROWLING]
- ... dressed like an elderly
530
00:19:08,281 --> 00:19:09,431
human female.
531
00:19:09,433 --> 00:19:11,033
Second, why is your wolf Jewish?
532
00:19:11,035 --> 00:19:12,368
- I took a swing.
- [GROWLING]
533
00:19:12,370 --> 00:19:16,906
Stop with this meshugenah nonsense!
534
00:19:16,908 --> 00:19:18,308
[SCREAMS]
535
00:19:18,310 --> 00:19:21,043
- [SCREAMING]
- I'll handle this.
536
00:19:21,045 --> 00:19:23,245
[WOLF GRUNTS]
537
00:19:23,247 --> 00:19:25,148
[GROWLING]
538
00:19:25,150 --> 00:19:26,248
- [GRUNTS]
- [GROWLS]
539
00:19:26,250 --> 00:19:27,382
Ow!
540
00:19:27,384 --> 00:19:28,950
Oh! Argh!
541
00:19:28,952 --> 00:19:30,687
[SCREAMING]
542
00:19:30,689 --> 00:19:33,389
- [SNARLING]
- [GRUNTS]
543
00:19:33,391 --> 00:19:34,890
We're back on top.
544
00:19:34,892 --> 00:19:37,494
No more sucking dick
under bridges for you.
545
00:19:37,496 --> 00:19:41,588
Well, I mean, unless
you're into that shit.
546
00:19:41,590 --> 00:19:42,831
Come here.
547
00:19:42,833 --> 00:19:44,199
Good boy, Grandma.
548
00:19:44,201 --> 00:19:45,568
Took you long enough.
549
00:19:45,570 --> 00:19:47,437
Did you bring Mama Harley's head?
550
00:19:47,439 --> 00:19:49,081
Let me see the head!
551
00:19:51,842 --> 00:19:53,941
Hiya, Queenie.
552
00:19:57,914 --> 00:19:58,981
Hmm. Props.
553
00:19:58,983 --> 00:20:02,051
[GRUNTS]
554
00:20:02,053 --> 00:20:04,454
Ah, shit...
555
00:20:04,456 --> 00:20:05,889
Oh, my god!
556
00:20:05,891 --> 00:20:07,823
I did not know her head would pop off.
557
00:20:07,825 --> 00:20:10,694
How did you manage to hollow
out the innards of that beast?
558
00:20:10,696 --> 00:20:12,795
Well, a lot of people ask me
559
00:20:12,797 --> 00:20:15,966
who would win between
a wolf and a shark.
560
00:20:15,968 --> 00:20:17,502
It's a shark.
561
00:20:17,504 --> 00:20:21,837
[MENACING MUSIC PLAYS]
562
00:20:21,839 --> 00:20:23,339
[DR. PSYCHO] Wow!
563
00:20:23,341 --> 00:20:24,608
Okay.
564
00:20:24,610 --> 00:20:27,141
- Hey.
- Whoa! Ive! You look great.
565
00:20:27,141 --> 00:20:28,141
Oh. You think?
566
00:20:28,141 --> 00:20:29,312
I didn't go too big or...
567
00:20:29,314 --> 00:20:30,783
No way. you're pulling it off!
568
00:20:30,783 --> 00:20:32,350
I mean, honestly, you
could've gone bigger.
569
00:20:32,350 --> 00:20:33,617
- Really?
- Thirty bucks
570
00:20:33,619 --> 00:20:35,918
if you put me in your pocket.
571
00:20:35,920 --> 00:20:37,986
What? I got a type! You knew this.
572
00:20:37,988 --> 00:20:40,091
[ROARING]
573
00:20:40,091 --> 00:20:41,091
[HARLEY SCREAMS]
574
00:20:41,092 --> 00:20:43,493
[GROWLING]
575
00:20:43,495 --> 00:20:46,620
[POISON IVY] Ahhh!
576
00:20:46,622 --> 00:20:47,599
[GRUNTS]
577
00:20:47,599 --> 00:20:48,733
- [SCREAMING]
- Gotcha!
578
00:20:48,735 --> 00:20:50,600
Thanks, Ive!
579
00:20:50,602 --> 00:20:52,035
Wow. You risked your life
580
00:20:52,035 --> 00:20:53,572
and killed trees for us.
581
00:20:53,572 --> 00:20:55,574
And I thought you didn't
love anything more than trees.
582
00:20:55,574 --> 00:20:56,840
Yeah, well, you know,
583
00:20:56,842 --> 00:20:59,175
I guess there are a
handful of exceptions.
584
00:20:59,177 --> 00:21:00,409
I'm so sorry.
585
00:21:00,411 --> 00:21:01,677
I'm not great at having people
586
00:21:01,679 --> 00:21:03,479
who are actually good to me in my life.
587
00:21:03,481 --> 00:21:05,247
Same. Most people are trash.
588
00:21:05,249 --> 00:21:06,750
I promise I'll do better,
589
00:21:06,752 --> 00:21:09,319
if you're willing' to give me a shot.
590
00:21:09,321 --> 00:21:10,386
[INHALES]
591
00:21:10,388 --> 00:21:11,422
Wouldn't it be messed up
592
00:21:11,422 --> 00:21:12,522
if I ate you right now?
593
00:21:12,524 --> 00:21:15,995
[BOTH LAUGHING]
594
00:21:15,995 --> 00:21:16,995
[METAL WHOOSHES]
595
00:21:16,995 --> 00:21:18,060
[GROANS]
596
00:21:18,062 --> 00:21:21,097
[GASPS] Ive!
597
00:21:21,099 --> 00:21:23,949
[LAUGHS MANIACALLY]
598
00:21:31,776 --> 00:21:33,074
[GROANS]
599
00:21:33,076 --> 00:21:34,127
[MOANS]
600
00:21:39,083 --> 00:21:40,315
Keep your eyes open, Ive!
601
00:21:40,317 --> 00:21:41,685
Don't leave me!
602
00:21:41,687 --> 00:21:44,219
We still got so much ass kicking' to do!
603
00:21:44,221 --> 00:21:46,389
[BREATHLESS] Harley...
604
00:21:46,391 --> 00:21:47,790
I can't...
605
00:21:47,792 --> 00:21:49,024
[GASPS]
606
00:21:49,026 --> 00:21:50,826
[SHUDDERING]
607
00:22:00,037 --> 00:22:02,972
[SOBBING]
608
00:22:02,974 --> 00:22:06,108
[CACKLING] Oops.
609
00:22:06,110 --> 00:22:07,275
[SCREAMS]
610
00:22:07,277 --> 00:22:11,027
[JOKER LAUGHS MANIACALLY]
611
00:22:15,186 --> 00:22:19,085
[JOKER CONTINUES TO LAUGH]
612
00:22:25,129 --> 00:22:27,231
[SAD MUSIC PLAYING]
39734
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