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1
00:00:02,511 --> 00:00:05,213
Keisha was the first
girl I ever really cared about.
2
00:00:05,280 --> 00:00:07,414
Even though she never
really cared aut me.
3
00:00:07,480 --> 00:00:09,314
When I found out her family
was moving,
4
00:00:09,470 --> 00:00:11,180
I was sad to see her go.
5
00:00:11,247 --> 00:00:12,918
Hey,
where y'all moving to?
6
00:00:13,021 --> 00:00:14,655
We're going to this place
in California.
7
00:00:14,781 --> 00:00:16,613
It's supposed to be
really, really nice.
8
00:00:16,793 --> 00:00:18,280
Palm trees and lawns
9
00:00:18,583 --> 00:00:20,052
and no violence
and no crime.
10
00:00:20,325 --> 00:00:22,433
Well, what's it called?
Compton.
11
00:00:22,990 --> 00:00:24,985
I always wondered how that
worked out for them?
12
00:00:25,409 --> 00:00:26,587
Bust a cap in 'em!
13
00:00:26,689 --> 00:00:28,646
Get down, Keisha!
Get down, girl, get down!
14
00:00:29,508 --> 00:00:30,410
So, you miss Keisha?
15
00:00:30,518 --> 00:00:32,962
Do you mean do I miss being
rejected, ignored
16
00:00:33,006 --> 00:00:33,991
and humiliated?
17
00:00:34,035 --> 00:00:35,072
Yeah, sort of.
18
00:00:35,317 --> 00:00:37,290
Why don't you just hang out
with somebody else?
19
00:00:37,357 --> 00:00:38,890
I don't like anyone else.
20
00:00:39,415 --> 00:00:40,881
And nobody else liked me.
21
00:00:43,526 --> 00:00:44,562
Hey, who's that?
22
00:00:48,547 --> 00:00:49,541
That's just Yvette.
23
00:00:49,618 --> 00:00:51,023
She lives
around the corner.
24
00:00:51,615 --> 00:00:53,313
You know, she's
kind of cute.
25
00:00:54,715 --> 00:00:56,271
Man, you don't want
to mess with her.
26
00:00:56,355 --> 00:00:57,513
The first girl you ever like
27
00:00:57,587 --> 00:00:58,943
is always tough to get over.
28
00:00:59,015 --> 00:01:00,891
She holds a special place
in your heart.
29
00:01:01,188 --> 00:01:03,283
So I decided to lower
my standards.
30
00:01:03,656 --> 00:01:05,270
I heard she'll go out with anybody.
31
00:01:06,428 --> 00:01:07,460
Really?
32
00:01:07,918 --> 00:01:09,700
Now that's my kind of girl.
33
00:01:10,857 --> 00:01:12,921
2x01 - Everybody Hates Rejection
34
00:01:13,375 --> 00:01:16,751
Transcript: FRM team - Trad: Birdyben
Synchro et relecture: Sixe
35
00:01:42,476 --> 00:01:44,810
Since I didn't want to make
the same mistakes with Yvette
36
00:01:44,888 --> 00:01:47,280
that I made with Keisha,
I needed a different approach.
37
00:01:47,347 --> 00:01:48,511
What do you know about her?
38
00:01:48,595 --> 00:01:50,601
Nothing much.
Just that she's supposed to go out
39
00:01:50,648 --> 00:01:52,163
with a lot of different types of guys.
40
00:01:52,257 --> 00:01:53,253
Perfect.
41
00:01:53,555 --> 00:01:55,063
You should do something simple.
42
00:01:55,215 --> 00:01:56,713
Something you haven't tried before.
43
00:01:56,786 --> 00:01:58,662
I can't just walk up to her
and ask her out.
44
00:01:58,807 --> 00:01:59,830
Have you tried it?
45
00:02:00,296 --> 00:02:02,732
- Not yet.
- The worst she can say is no.
46
00:02:03,245 --> 00:02:05,312
- Okay then, let's try it.
- Try what?
47
00:02:05,617 --> 00:02:07,410
You'll be Yvette
and I'll ask you out.
48
00:02:07,575 --> 00:02:08,711
Brokeback Hallway.
49
00:02:08,855 --> 00:02:10,760
- Right here?
- It was your idea.
50
00:02:11,195 --> 00:02:12,363
You going to help me or not?
51
00:02:12,507 --> 00:02:13,743
Fine. Hurry up.
52
00:02:14,208 --> 00:02:15,413
Hey, Yvette.
53
00:02:15,988 --> 00:02:18,571
So, you want to go out
with me sometime...?
54
00:02:18,637 --> 00:02:20,190
No, you skinny black bum.
55
00:02:23,675 --> 00:02:25,683
I thought the worst
you could say was no.
56
00:02:25,765 --> 00:02:27,003
I was improvising.
57
00:02:27,097 --> 00:02:28,933
Well, you know, since you're
making stuff up
58
00:02:28,968 --> 00:02:30,161
couldn't you have said yes?
59
00:02:30,596 --> 00:02:32,013
He wasn't my type anyway.
60
00:02:32,896 --> 00:02:34,940
We had only been living
in Bed-Stuy for a year
61
00:02:35,007 --> 00:02:37,213
when the crime rate
started to go through the roof.
62
00:02:37,627 --> 00:02:39,633
In the late '90s,
they had the Internet boom,
63
00:02:40,085 --> 00:02:42,102
but in the '80s,
we had the crack boom.
64
00:02:42,448 --> 00:02:44,540
It used to take years
to become a junkie,
65
00:02:44,688 --> 00:02:47,310
but crack cut that down
to 37 minutes.
66
00:02:47,557 --> 00:02:48,593
Even on my block,
67
00:02:48,635 --> 00:02:50,530
things were starting
to get out of control.
68
00:02:50,756 --> 00:02:52,303
The muggers
were getting mugged.
69
00:02:52,548 --> 00:02:53,810
Let me hold a quarter.
70
00:02:55,536 --> 00:02:57,980
What's up, little man?
Let me hold a dollar right quick.
71
00:02:59,058 --> 00:03:00,312
I'll take that quarter, too.
72
00:03:00,378 --> 00:03:01,383
But...
73
00:03:02,845 --> 00:03:05,161
Our new next door neighbor
was Louise Clarkson.
74
00:03:05,355 --> 00:03:06,590
She hated our neighborhood,
75
00:03:06,648 --> 00:03:08,682
and was intent
on doing something about it.
76
00:03:08,786 --> 00:03:12,072
Well, I can see we're both very busy,
so I'll just get to the point.
77
00:03:12,416 --> 00:03:14,391
I'm starting a
neighborhood block watch.
78
00:03:14,948 --> 00:03:16,563
Why do we need a block watch?
79
00:03:17,348 --> 00:03:18,701
In case you haven't noticed,
80
00:03:18,726 --> 00:03:20,860
crime is running rampant
in this neighborhood.
81
00:03:20,987 --> 00:03:22,042
No, it's not.
82
00:03:22,117 --> 00:03:23,291
This block is fine.
83
00:03:23,368 --> 00:03:25,712
Burglaries are up,
assaults, murders.
84
00:03:26,417 --> 00:03:27,481
Is that fine?
85
00:03:27,797 --> 00:03:29,522
I don't know what block,
you've been on,
86
00:03:29,588 --> 00:03:32,592
but this block is okay,
but thank you for stopping by.
87
00:03:32,685 --> 00:03:35,460
Well, thank you.
Uh, something on your teeth.
88
00:03:35,715 --> 00:03:36,742
I'll see myself out.
89
00:03:36,816 --> 00:03:37,942
Okay.
90
00:03:38,016 --> 00:03:39,081
Love the couch.
91
00:03:42,256 --> 00:03:43,350
Neighborhood block watch.
92
00:03:43,437 --> 00:03:46,012
My mother didn't want to accept
that things were getting worse
93
00:03:46,186 --> 00:03:47,740
until someing happened to us.
94
00:03:47,978 --> 00:03:49,143
Rochelle!
95
00:03:49,338 --> 00:03:51,011
What? I'm in here.
96
00:03:51,308 --> 00:03:52,673
My truck got stolen!
97
00:03:52,816 --> 00:03:54,510
What?! Oh, no!
98
00:03:54,665 --> 00:03:56,073
I could get fired for this.
99
00:03:56,237 --> 00:03:57,841
Well, baby,
are you sure it's stolen?
100
00:03:57,886 --> 00:03:59,602
Maybe you just forgot
where you parked it.
101
00:03:59,706 --> 00:04:01,690
Rochelle, it's not keys,
it's a truck.
102
00:04:02,007 --> 00:04:03,600
Even if I forgot where I parked it,
103
00:04:03,736 --> 00:04:05,502
you can still see it,
'cause it's a truck!
104
00:04:05,586 --> 00:04:06,850
Well, don't get mad at me.
105
00:04:06,955 --> 00:04:08,380
You act like I stole it.
106
00:04:08,507 --> 00:04:10,800
That's it.
I'm starting a block watch.
107
00:04:11,135 --> 00:04:12,722
That sounds like a good idea.
108
00:04:13,078 --> 00:04:14,610
As soon as I finish this toe.
109
00:04:15,825 --> 00:04:17,910
My mother was a ghetto snob,
so to her,
110
00:04:17,997 --> 00:04:19,810
this wasn't just
a block watch meeting.
111
00:04:20,015 --> 00:04:21,883
It was a Rochelle watch meeting.
112
00:04:22,776 --> 00:04:23,780
What's all this?
113
00:04:24,035 --> 00:04:25,633
Food for the block watch meeting.
114
00:04:26,267 --> 00:04:28,963
You're supposed to be watching
the block, not feeding it.
115
00:04:29,038 --> 00:04:31,792
Julius, I can't invite people
over here without feeding them.
116
00:04:31,965 --> 00:04:33,992
People in my neighborhood
never got together
117
00:04:34,076 --> 00:04:35,340
without bringing food.
118
00:04:36,256 --> 00:04:39,313
Oh, I am so sorry
you got run over by a truck.
119
00:04:40,238 --> 00:04:41,460
But I brought you some ribs.
120
00:04:42,695 --> 00:04:44,771
My baby!
They killed my baby.
121
00:04:44,865 --> 00:04:46,693
I'm sorry about your baby.
122
00:04:47,448 --> 00:04:48,441
Catfish?
123
00:04:48,677 --> 00:04:52,402
And besides, how do you expect people
to fight crime when they're hungry?
124
00:04:52,905 --> 00:04:55,213
How do you expect me to
feed people when I'm broke?
125
00:04:55,547 --> 00:04:56,541
What you say?
126
00:04:57,785 --> 00:04:58,781
You smell smoke?
127
00:04:58,856 --> 00:05:00,553
Asking Greg out was one thing,
128
00:05:00,715 --> 00:05:02,551
but Yvette was a wholenother story.
129
00:05:02,617 --> 00:05:05,353
When you ask a girl out,
you've got to have your game together.
130
00:05:05,446 --> 00:05:07,982
Chris, look, a woman
got a lot of choices,
131
00:05:08,235 --> 00:05:11,352
so you got to show her something
that separates you from the other guys.
132
00:05:12,077 --> 00:05:15,733
Well, I've got the perfect thing
for you-- Drakkar Noir.
133
00:05:16,347 --> 00:05:17,641
Drives the ladies wild.
134
00:05:17,868 --> 00:05:18,871
Four dollars.
135
00:05:18,985 --> 00:05:20,521
You can't sell that in here.
136
00:05:21,105 --> 00:05:22,091
Why not?
137
00:05:22,155 --> 00:05:23,982
'Cause I'll break your other arm.
138
00:05:26,515 --> 00:05:28,010
Here, try this one.
139
00:05:32,348 --> 00:05:34,381
Yeah.
That's just five dollars.
140
00:05:34,695 --> 00:05:36,321
F...? What...? Five...?
141
00:05:40,278 --> 00:05:41,652
Here come your lady, young blood.
142
00:05:41,726 --> 00:05:42,992
- See you later, okay?
- Okay.
143
00:05:55,197 --> 00:05:56,621
You're Yvette, right?
144
00:05:56,780 --> 00:05:57,875
I'm Chris.
145
00:05:57,959 --> 00:05:59,917
Hi. What's that smell?
146
00:06:00,879 --> 00:06:02,156
That's my cologne.
147
00:06:02,657 --> 00:06:03,711
That's nice.
148
00:06:03,897 --> 00:06:04,863
Thanks.
149
00:06:04,936 --> 00:06:06,872
Well, you know,
I've seen you around the block
150
00:06:06,938 --> 00:06:08,680
and thought
you were kind of cute.
151
00:06:08,916 --> 00:06:10,012
Thank you.
152
00:06:10,116 --> 00:06:13,181
So, I was wondering if maybe
you can go out this weekend?
153
00:06:13,666 --> 00:06:14,661
Go out?
154
00:06:15,027 --> 00:06:18,141
- Yeah, to the movies or something.
- You paying?
155
00:06:18,266 --> 00:06:21,201
I've seen that look before.It usually led to this.
156
00:06:22,236 --> 00:06:25,760
Wait. What do you want
to go and do this for? Why?
157
00:06:27,426 --> 00:06:28,483
Okay.
158
00:06:28,755 --> 00:06:29,932
I said this...
159
00:06:30,636 --> 00:06:31,650
All right, then.
160
00:06:31,956 --> 00:06:33,261
but I felt like this:
161
00:06:40,687 --> 00:06:42,732
The toughest part about
getting a block watch
162
00:06:42,887 --> 00:06:44,951
was finding people
who had stuff worth watching.
163
00:06:45,057 --> 00:06:48,073
All right, now, the most important part
of the Block Watch program is
164
00:06:48,585 --> 00:06:50,133
communication.
165
00:06:50,406 --> 00:06:54,980
So if you see anything,
you have to file a report.
166
00:06:55,558 --> 00:06:58,970
Without information,
not a lot your local police can do.
167
00:06:59,137 --> 00:07:01,490
Okay, well,
what type of information?
168
00:07:01,925 --> 00:07:05,093
Like if you see somebody
stealing my couch, tell me.
169
00:07:05,936 --> 00:07:07,132
Excuse me.
170
00:07:07,426 --> 00:07:09,410
Translation--
"What you say, heifer?"
171
00:07:09,576 --> 00:07:11,191
- Excuse me? Excuse you.
- Who are you?
172
00:07:11,266 --> 00:07:12,741
Who are you? Oh, girl, that's Louise.
173
00:07:12,785 --> 00:07:14,810
- She just moved in next d...
- I beg your pardon.
174
00:07:14,858 --> 00:07:16,000
I'm sitting right here.
175
00:07:16,205 --> 00:07:17,293
I'm Louise.
176
00:07:17,366 --> 00:07:19,001
I just moved in next door,
177
00:07:19,238 --> 00:07:21,670
and this was my idea.
178
00:07:22,518 --> 00:07:25,442
By the way, in my old neighborhood,
we didn't have these problems.
179
00:07:25,548 --> 00:07:26,830
She told her.
180
00:07:27,128 --> 00:07:28,850
- Where are you from?
- Queens.
181
00:07:29,018 --> 00:07:31,301
Oh, Queens.
Very lovely there.
182
00:07:31,668 --> 00:07:32,783
Do you know the Jacobsons?
183
00:07:32,858 --> 00:07:34,531
- The black Jacobs?
- No the white ones.
184
00:07:34,638 --> 00:07:36,232
- The ones with the restaurant?
- Yeah.
185
00:07:36,295 --> 00:07:39,783
Excuse me, can we talk abo
this neighborod, Brooklyn?
186
00:07:40,048 --> 00:07:41,212
- All right.
- Touchy.
187
00:07:41,375 --> 00:07:44,962
Now, what's very important,
also, in the Block Watch program is,
188
00:07:45,048 --> 00:07:48,551
if you are away from your house
for any extended period of time...
189
00:07:48,848 --> 00:07:50,572
In Bed-Stuy, that's 12 minutes.
190
00:07:50,678 --> 00:07:53,210
...you must alert
the other Block Watch members.
191
00:07:53,378 --> 00:07:55,242
And they will watch your property.
192
00:07:55,556 --> 00:07:56,652
Correct.
193
00:07:56,915 --> 00:07:58,161
Nicely done.
194
00:07:59,517 --> 00:08:01,813
Like let's say one of you is
on your way to Florida...
195
00:08:02,778 --> 00:08:03,763
Florida?
196
00:08:03,848 --> 00:08:05,572
The closest my family came to Florida,
197
00:08:05,658 --> 00:08:07,691
was watching Esther Rolle
on Good Times.
198
00:08:07,758 --> 00:08:08,940
Now I get it.
199
00:08:09,047 --> 00:08:11,391
Then the rest of us
can watch out for their house.
200
00:08:11,516 --> 00:08:12,973
I'll take the night shift.
201
00:08:13,655 --> 00:08:17,631
All right. Another very important part
of a Block Watch program is...
202
00:08:17,808 --> 00:08:19,603
awareness, huh?
203
00:08:20,006 --> 00:08:21,873
And that's why you have these.
204
00:08:21,958 --> 00:08:24,941
These are stickers, and these
are gonna in your window.
205
00:08:25,205 --> 00:08:27,781
These stickers will be seen
by the offenders,
206
00:08:27,888 --> 00:08:30,460
and then they will be
less likely to offend.
207
00:08:30,686 --> 00:08:31,870
You mean steal?
208
00:08:31,898 --> 00:08:33,552
Correct. Nicely done.
209
00:08:33,778 --> 00:08:34,981
Well, why she get a button...?
210
00:08:35,028 --> 00:08:36,101
Stickers?
211
00:08:36,855 --> 00:08:39,752
You think that's gonna keep people
from coming into the house
212
00:08:39,805 --> 00:08:41,081
and hitting me over the head,
213
00:08:41,168 --> 00:08:42,690
'cause I got a sticker in the window?
214
00:08:43,416 --> 00:08:44,932
If she wasn't so damn evil,
215
00:08:44,975 --> 00:08:47,340
nobody would be trying
to hit her over the head.
216
00:08:47,685 --> 00:08:48,881
Excuse me?
217
00:08:48,995 --> 00:08:50,381
You're excused.
218
00:08:51,495 --> 00:08:54,141
All right, now, you need to elect
a Block Watch captain.
219
00:08:54,226 --> 00:08:55,762
Okay. All right.
220
00:08:57,578 --> 00:08:59,540
I think I should be the
Block Watch captain.
221
00:08:59,596 --> 00:09:00,581
And why is that?
222
00:09:00,646 --> 00:09:03,581
Well, because I'm the only one
on the block who doesn't need watching.
223
00:09:03,838 --> 00:09:05,903
No. It was my husband's truck
that got stolen.
224
00:09:06,005 --> 00:09:07,190
Yes, well, if you had done
225
00:09:07,236 --> 00:09:09,650
what I asked you to do,
which was start the neighborhood...
226
00:09:09,697 --> 00:09:12,063
See, the problem is,
you're new to the neighborhood, okay?
227
00:09:16,747 --> 00:09:17,833
Ladies, ladies,
228
00:09:17,898 --> 00:09:20,030
ladies,
ladies, ladies...
229
00:09:20,596 --> 00:09:22,242
Let's put it to a vote.
230
00:09:22,296 --> 00:09:23,892
- Please.
- Okay.
231
00:09:24,017 --> 00:09:25,730
- Who made the pie?
- I did.
232
00:09:25,808 --> 00:09:28,252
I nominate Rochelle to be
the first Block Watch captain.
233
00:09:28,377 --> 00:09:31,020
No. You cannot nominate
because she made some pie.
234
00:09:31,105 --> 00:09:32,492
- It's some good pie.
- Shut up.
235
00:09:32,796 --> 00:09:34,722
- All right, all in favor?
- You like my pie?
236
00:09:34,808 --> 00:09:36,670
Aye. The ayes have it.
237
00:09:36,956 --> 00:09:39,642
I... came up
with this idea.
238
00:09:39,967 --> 00:09:43,932
I don't see why I am not
the Block Watch captain.
239
00:09:43,977 --> 00:09:45,791
Because we voted,
and the pie lady won.
240
00:09:45,885 --> 00:09:46,941
Okay, fine.
241
00:09:47,027 --> 00:09:49,701
Now when you all come home
to your apartments,
242
00:09:49,797 --> 00:09:51,121
and there's nothing there
243
00:09:51,227 --> 00:09:53,311
except a pie,
we all know who to talk to--
244
00:09:53,395 --> 00:09:55,663
the Block Watch captain,
and we'll say,
245
00:09:55,726 --> 00:09:57,261
"Where were you,
Block Watch Captain?"
246
00:09:57,308 --> 00:09:58,961
She'll say,
"I've been making pie."
247
00:09:59,058 --> 00:10:00,302
I do not talk like that.
248
00:10:00,876 --> 00:10:02,551
Any questions, any questions?
249
00:10:02,655 --> 00:10:03,723
I have one.
250
00:10:03,817 --> 00:10:04,992
So, what type of places
251
00:10:05,036 --> 00:10:07,142
would you consider
to be the most vulnerable?
252
00:10:07,418 --> 00:10:10,290
Like, say an offender was gonna
break into somebody's house.
253
00:10:10,446 --> 00:10:11,852
Who would be the best victim?
254
00:10:11,955 --> 00:10:13,201
That's a very good question.
255
00:10:13,307 --> 00:10:14,441
No, it's not.
256
00:10:14,507 --> 00:10:16,822
You just break into a house
where nobody's home.
257
00:10:16,867 --> 00:10:17,883
That's right.
258
00:10:17,945 --> 00:10:18,992
Cool.
259
00:10:19,077 --> 00:10:20,183
I got to go.
260
00:10:23,127 --> 00:10:26,411
With a four second head start,
Jerome stole four stereos.
261
00:10:27,115 --> 00:10:29,653
My mother wasn't the only one
helping out the community.
262
00:10:29,755 --> 00:10:32,313
At school, Drew volunteered
to be a Patrol Boy,
263
00:10:32,466 --> 00:10:34,700
which is just a fancy name
for crossing guard.
264
00:10:34,818 --> 00:10:35,991
Okay, go.
265
00:10:40,496 --> 00:10:42,353
Hey, Drew, can you
help me cross?
266
00:10:42,426 --> 00:10:43,521
Sure.
267
00:10:44,446 --> 00:10:45,592
Thanks, Drew.
268
00:10:45,948 --> 00:10:48,383
If this had been me,
here's how it would have gone.
269
00:10:50,945 --> 00:10:53,373
Because I was going on a date
for the first time,
270
00:10:53,435 --> 00:10:55,131
everyone had a helpful suggestion.
271
00:10:55,175 --> 00:10:57,073
Be sure to compliment her
on her shoes.
272
00:10:57,136 --> 00:10:59,143
- Girls like that.
- Shoes, right.
273
00:10:59,618 --> 00:11:01,703
Tell her you got a job.
Girls like that more.
274
00:11:01,788 --> 00:11:02,980
Job, I got it.
275
00:11:03,067 --> 00:11:05,372
And hold a piece of gum under
your tongue and let it soak
276
00:11:05,405 --> 00:11:07,833
- so your breath won't stink.
- Okay, gum.
277
00:11:08,816 --> 00:11:11,042
Oh, yeah,
and if the movie is sad, don't cry.
278
00:11:11,106 --> 00:11:12,223
She'll think you're a punk.
279
00:11:12,306 --> 00:11:13,532
It's Footloose.
280
00:11:13,608 --> 00:11:14,843
I ain't gonna cry.
281
00:11:15,276 --> 00:11:16,992
Oh, baby, have a good time.
282
00:11:17,325 --> 00:11:18,552
But not too good a time,
283
00:11:18,656 --> 00:11:20,633
'cause you know I'm not raising
no babies.
284
00:11:21,125 --> 00:11:22,441
Enjoy yourself.
285
00:11:23,527 --> 00:11:26,260
This is half off on a soda
and box of Jujubes.
286
00:11:27,456 --> 00:11:28,643
Thanks.
287
00:11:29,327 --> 00:11:30,633
Oh, what the hell.
288
00:11:31,697 --> 00:11:33,572
Here's a coupon
for a free box of popcorn.
289
00:11:35,366 --> 00:11:37,801
The last time my father
gave man an extra coupon
290
00:11:37,885 --> 00:11:38,853
was when I gave him
291
00:11:38,915 --> 00:11:42,010
a get-one coupon,
get-one-coupon-free coupon.
292
00:11:42,327 --> 00:11:44,203
Have a good time.
You look good, man.
293
00:11:45,206 --> 00:11:46,453
That's my boy.
294
00:11:46,536 --> 00:11:50,020
Standing there waiting for Yvettewas one of the best feelings I'd had.
295
00:11:50,196 --> 00:11:51,491
But after 15 minutes,
296
00:11:51,526 --> 00:11:53,773
I thought,
"Maybe the buses are running late."
297
00:11:55,427 --> 00:11:58,303
After 30 minutes, I thought,
"Maybe the bus broke down."
298
00:12:00,785 --> 00:12:02,193
After an hour, I thought,
299
00:12:02,238 --> 00:12:03,913
"Maybe the bus got in an accident,
300
00:12:04,057 --> 00:12:06,692
"skidded through the guardrail,
exploded in midair,
301
00:12:06,845 --> 00:12:09,300
and ended up at the bottom
of the East River."
302
00:12:10,147 --> 00:12:11,603
After the movie was over,
303
00:12:11,685 --> 00:12:14,712
I thought, "Maybe
she never got on that bus at all."
304
00:12:15,688 --> 00:12:17,622
To this day, I can't make it
through Footloose
305
00:12:17,686 --> 00:12:19,002
without crying.
306
00:12:22,578 --> 00:12:23,881
That's a * man.
307
00:12:23,947 --> 00:12:25,113
Did she say what happened?
308
00:12:25,188 --> 00:12:26,513
I haven't heard from her.
309
00:12:26,586 --> 00:12:28,112
Why do girls do junk like that?
310
00:12:28,555 --> 00:12:29,932
I don't know what to tell you.
311
00:12:30,017 --> 00:12:32,402
Greg and I had the same
conversation last night
312
00:12:32,456 --> 00:12:34,292
and he still didn't know
what to tell me.
313
00:12:34,797 --> 00:12:35,941
That sucks.
314
00:12:36,238 --> 00:12:38,592
Man, I don't know how you
made it to school today.
315
00:12:38,875 --> 00:12:40,651
Stood up,
out there on the street,
316
00:12:40,826 --> 00:12:42,111
talk about embarrassing.
317
00:12:42,365 --> 00:12:43,841
If I were you,
I'd be so depressed,
318
00:12:43,917 --> 00:12:45,733
I'd be standing on top
of the Brooklyn Bridge
319
00:12:45,777 --> 00:12:47,883
with a hundred pounds of
rocks tied around my ankles
320
00:12:47,926 --> 00:12:49,583
and a bag of rats
wrapped around my head,
321
00:12:49,645 --> 00:12:51,433
- ready to jump...
- Okay, I get it.
322
00:12:52,685 --> 00:12:54,411
Forget about it, man.
You're a nice guy.
323
00:12:54,487 --> 00:12:57,312
Aren't you the same one
who called me a little black bum?
324
00:12:57,497 --> 00:12:59,561
Like I said,
I was improvising.
325
00:12:59,797 --> 00:13:02,202
If it makes you feel any better,
I would have shown up.
326
00:13:02,296 --> 00:13:03,542
That didn't mean anything.
327
00:13:03,645 --> 00:13:06,041
Greg once showed up at
a sneaker-string taste test.
328
00:13:11,447 --> 00:13:12,812
I'm watching you!
329
00:13:12,886 --> 00:13:15,112
Because my mother
was the Block Watch captain,
330
00:13:15,187 --> 00:13:16,911
if anything happened
in the neighborhood,
331
00:13:16,997 --> 00:13:18,911
Miss Louise made sure
she heard about it.
332
00:13:21,308 --> 00:13:23,110
They're spraying graffiti downstairs.
333
00:13:23,307 --> 00:13:24,603
I'll file a report.
334
00:13:25,136 --> 00:13:26,780
There's a mad dog chasing people!
335
00:13:26,848 --> 00:13:28,120
I'll file a report.
336
00:13:28,848 --> 00:13:30,080
Somebody stole my mail.
337
00:13:30,268 --> 00:13:31,382
I'll file a report.
338
00:13:31,986 --> 00:13:33,580
I can't find my glasses.
339
00:13:33,588 --> 00:13:34,930
I'll file a report.
340
00:13:35,698 --> 00:13:36,910
Larry and them coming.
341
00:13:37,465 --> 00:13:38,731
I'll file a report.
342
00:13:39,477 --> 00:13:41,172
Being stood up was bad enough,
343
00:13:41,305 --> 00:13:42,703
so I didn't want to tell anybody.
344
00:13:46,335 --> 00:13:48,842
Listen, you ever hear
of Whodini?
345
00:13:48,917 --> 00:13:50,511
Ecstasy and Jalil? Yeah.
346
00:13:50,585 --> 00:13:52,243
Yeah, I got a couple of tickets.
347
00:13:53,237 --> 00:13:55,563
I thought the show
was about the magician.
348
00:13:56,367 --> 00:13:58,123
- You want 'em?
- Yeah.
349
00:13:58,848 --> 00:14:00,161
Maybe you can take your girl.
350
00:14:00,266 --> 00:14:01,343
I don't think so.
351
00:14:01,417 --> 00:14:03,613
- Why not?
- She stood me up.
352
00:14:03,775 --> 00:14:06,142
I was standing outside
the theater for two hours
353
00:14:06,205 --> 00:14:07,280
and she never shed up.
354
00:14:07,365 --> 00:14:09,080
What?
You gonna let her treat you that way
355
00:14:09,148 --> 00:14:10,230
and get away with it?
356
00:14:10,315 --> 00:14:12,863
Listen, if I was you,
I'd go find that girl,
357
00:14:13,007 --> 00:14:16,211
take her by the hair and shake her
like an Etch-A-Sketch.
358
00:14:16,288 --> 00:14:17,670
Doc lives alone.
359
00:14:17,918 --> 00:14:19,442
She does owe me an explanation.
360
00:14:19,515 --> 00:14:20,711
Now you're talking.
361
00:14:21,926 --> 00:14:23,140
Well, here's your chance.
362
00:14:24,395 --> 00:14:25,583
Hey, Chris.
363
00:14:25,647 --> 00:14:28,673
Oh, hey,
what happened to you yesterday?
364
00:14:29,375 --> 00:14:31,841
That's right.
We were supposed to go see Footloose.
365
00:14:32,186 --> 00:14:33,272
I totally forgot.
366
00:14:33,357 --> 00:14:35,691
I didn't know it then,
but, for years to come,
367
00:14:35,737 --> 00:14:37,781
I dated an awful lot
of women with amnesia.
368
00:14:38,167 --> 00:14:40,082
Oh, that's right.
369
00:14:40,146 --> 00:14:41,910
We're supposed
to go to the prom together.
370
00:14:42,378 --> 00:14:43,461
I totally forgot.
371
00:14:43,546 --> 00:14:44,501
That's right.
372
00:14:44,578 --> 00:14:46,780
We were supposed to do something
for your birthday.
373
00:14:47,588 --> 00:14:48,550
Totally forgot.
374
00:14:48,637 --> 00:14:50,970
Oh, that's right.
I was supposed to give you a kidney.
375
00:14:51,047 --> 00:14:52,621
Boy, I forgot all about you.
376
00:14:53,147 --> 00:14:54,382
Until I got famous,
377
00:14:54,447 --> 00:14:56,711
I never met a woman
that could remember anything.
378
00:14:57,048 --> 00:14:59,182
So,
maybe we can go Saturday.
379
00:15:00,126 --> 00:15:01,230
This Saturday?
380
00:15:01,336 --> 00:15:03,182
I can't.
I have a piano lesson.
381
00:15:03,247 --> 00:15:04,343
Are you free Sunday?
382
00:15:04,767 --> 00:15:05,951
I have to go clean house.
383
00:15:07,166 --> 00:15:09,142
Too bad.
I got these Whodini tickets
384
00:15:09,215 --> 00:15:10,741
for Sunday afternoon
at the park.
385
00:15:11,146 --> 00:15:12,242
For real?
386
00:15:12,458 --> 00:15:13,453
Yeah, right here.
387
00:15:14,167 --> 00:15:15,370
You know what?
388
00:15:16,055 --> 00:15:17,581
Maybe I can go.
389
00:15:18,596 --> 00:15:20,690
So I'll see you Sunday then?
390
00:15:21,268 --> 00:15:22,282
All right.
391
00:15:22,508 --> 00:15:23,592
Sunday.
392
00:15:29,905 --> 00:15:31,021
What?
393
00:15:31,165 --> 00:15:33,082
That girl is not interested in you.
394
00:15:33,285 --> 00:15:34,823
She's interested
in your tickets.
395
00:15:36,936 --> 00:15:38,782
- Think so?
- She's an opportunist.
396
00:15:39,377 --> 00:15:41,780
She goes with whoever
has the best deal.
397
00:15:42,157 --> 00:15:43,512
She only agreed to go out with you
398
00:15:43,588 --> 00:15:45,563
because she didn't have
anything better to do.
399
00:15:45,628 --> 00:15:48,012
That's how I ended up
married for three years.
400
00:15:48,646 --> 00:15:49,942
I don't Yvette's like that.
401
00:15:50,307 --> 00:15:51,443
Want to make a bet?
402
00:15:53,957 --> 00:15:56,121
While I was trying
to get a girl's attention,
403
00:15:56,225 --> 00:15:58,373
girls were trying to get
Drew's attention.
404
00:15:59,125 --> 00:16:01,341
- I feel so safe with you here.
- Thanks.
405
00:16:01,587 --> 00:16:02,582
Drew,
406
00:16:02,647 --> 00:16:04,200
this is all for you.
407
00:16:05,638 --> 00:16:06,773
What are you doing?
408
00:16:08,285 --> 00:16:09,950
- Drew.
- Drew.
409
00:16:10,658 --> 00:16:11,811
Oh, man!
410
00:16:13,056 --> 00:16:15,041
Drew's corner was crawling
with more girls
411
00:16:15,088 --> 00:16:16,632
than Usher's garbage can.
412
00:16:16,736 --> 00:16:18,980
I didn't want to believe Doc
was right about Yvette,
413
00:16:19,197 --> 00:16:20,981
so I decided to see for myself.
414
00:16:21,357 --> 00:16:23,243
Hey, Yvette. Yeah, it's Chris.
415
00:16:23,485 --> 00:16:26,853
- Hi.
- Listen, about those tickets, yeah.
416
00:16:26,947 --> 00:16:29,121
- I found out they were fake.
- For real?
417
00:16:30,057 --> 00:16:32,033
But you know, we can
still go out to a movie.
418
00:16:32,197 --> 00:16:34,252
Yeah, I found out
there's this new movie...
419
00:16:35,698 --> 00:16:36,752
Hello?
420
00:16:45,885 --> 00:16:48,253
The number you have reached
has been disconnected.
421
00:16:49,458 --> 00:16:51,480
Maybe a bus crashed into her phone.
422
00:16:53,858 --> 00:16:55,080
Rochelle.
423
00:16:55,146 --> 00:16:56,112
Yes, Louise.
424
00:16:56,187 --> 00:16:57,890
- I need stickers.
- What?
425
00:16:57,947 --> 00:17:00,910
Stickers. I've been up
and down this block.
426
00:17:00,987 --> 00:17:03,293
I've looked in every window
and there are no stickers.
427
00:17:03,378 --> 00:17:05,883
How do we expect offenders
not to offend
428
00:17:05,947 --> 00:17:07,383
if there are no stickers?
429
00:17:07,445 --> 00:17:09,540
I'll get you
some stickers, Louise.
430
00:17:09,617 --> 00:17:10,583
Thank you.
431
00:17:11,698 --> 00:17:13,941
Baby, that's nine cent worth of tape.
432
00:17:14,858 --> 00:17:16,023
Hi, Julius.
433
00:17:16,555 --> 00:17:17,972
So sorry about your truck.
434
00:17:18,475 --> 00:17:20,572
I can't believe they stole it
right off the street.
435
00:17:20,636 --> 00:17:21,791
It was right here.
436
00:17:24,185 --> 00:17:26,111
- Right here?
- Right here.
437
00:17:26,648 --> 00:17:28,033
Next to the fire hydrant?
438
00:17:35,087 --> 00:17:36,623
They must have
just put that there.
439
00:17:36,706 --> 00:17:38,713
Well, it probably
wouldn't have happened
440
00:17:38,785 --> 00:17:40,371
if it had had a sticker on it.
441
00:17:44,008 --> 00:17:45,191
I like her.
442
00:17:47,046 --> 00:17:48,041
What?
443
00:17:49,365 --> 00:17:50,441
Matches...
444
00:17:51,486 --> 00:17:52,480
Hey, Chris.
445
00:17:52,528 --> 00:17:54,281
Hey, can I talk
to your for a minute?
446
00:17:54,345 --> 00:17:56,343
I hope she doesn't have
something better to do.
447
00:17:58,627 --> 00:17:59,692
What?
448
00:17:59,877 --> 00:18:02,581
How come you didn't tell me
you just didn't want to go out with me
449
00:18:02,646 --> 00:18:04,123
instead of dissing me like that?
450
00:18:04,328 --> 00:18:05,380
Like what?
451
00:18:05,485 --> 00:18:08,360
Like leaving me out in front
of the movie theater like a fool.
452
00:18:08,446 --> 00:18:10,610
Like saying you want to go
with me to go see Whodini
453
00:18:10,655 --> 00:18:11,742
then hanging up in my face?
454
00:18:11,815 --> 00:18:13,191
You said the tickets were fake.
455
00:18:13,257 --> 00:18:16,243
I thought you re going
because you wanted to go out with me.
456
00:18:16,575 --> 00:18:19,012
Why'd you even agree to go
out with me in the first place?
457
00:18:19,096 --> 00:18:21,000
Because I didn't have
anything better to do.
458
00:18:21,247 --> 00:18:22,381
Why didn't you say that?
459
00:18:23,345 --> 00:18:25,042
I was trying
not to hurt your feelings.
460
00:18:25,118 --> 00:18:27,013
Well, you know,
you really suck at that.
461
00:18:27,288 --> 00:18:29,320
Well,
what do you want me to do?
462
00:18:31,598 --> 00:18:34,452
You know what?
Nothing.
463
00:18:35,187 --> 00:18:37,202
I asked Yvette out
after I got famous.
464
00:18:37,255 --> 00:18:39,630
She stood me up and went out
with Chris Tucker.
465
00:18:40,038 --> 00:18:42,180
You handled that like a man, Chris.
466
00:18:43,068 --> 00:18:44,780
You still got those tickets?
467
00:18:45,147 --> 00:18:46,410
Yeah. Why?
468
00:18:46,598 --> 00:18:50,623
I got this young honey
on the line and she loves rap.
469
00:18:52,217 --> 00:18:53,362
Have fun.
470
00:18:53,986 --> 00:18:55,472
You know I will.
471
00:18:55,807 --> 00:18:58,522
Man, the first time I asked
a girl to go out with me
472
00:18:58,607 --> 00:18:59,970
and this happens.
473
00:19:00,187 --> 00:19:02,472
Hey, at least it ended better than this.
474
00:19:06,017 --> 00:19:08,613
After a week of being captain
of the Block Watch,
475
00:19:08,687 --> 00:19:10,942
my mother was going down with the ship.
476
00:19:11,018 --> 00:19:12,540
I heard a noise in my house.
477
00:19:12,645 --> 00:19:14,351
I heard a noise in my house, too,
478
00:19:14,435 --> 00:19:16,111
and it's you at my damn door!
479
00:19:17,075 --> 00:19:18,710
Well, you are
the Block Watch captain.
480
00:19:18,775 --> 00:19:21,403
No, no, I'm not.
You win! You win!
481
00:19:21,565 --> 00:19:24,243
Here, here, you want to be
the Block Watch captain,
482
00:19:24,318 --> 00:19:26,413
be the Block Watch captain.
483
00:19:26,487 --> 00:19:28,202
Well, only if you're
absolutely sure.
484
00:19:30,955 --> 00:19:33,103
Here's the rest of the piece of the pie!
485
00:19:36,066 --> 00:19:38,463
All right, we gonna see
who's watching the block now.
486
00:19:40,165 --> 00:19:41,442
What are you doing?
487
00:19:42,616 --> 00:19:44,013
I'm quitting the Patrol Boys.
488
00:19:44,247 --> 00:19:45,310
Why?
489
00:19:45,385 --> 00:19:46,720
Girls are crazy.
490
00:19:46,916 --> 00:19:49,792
No truer words have ever been spoken.
491
00:19:50,567 --> 00:19:52,513
After getting put down by Keisha
492
00:19:52,695 --> 00:19:54,041
and stood up by Yvette,
493
00:19:54,128 --> 00:19:56,822
I was through having crushes
on girls in the neighborhood,
494
00:19:57,046 --> 00:19:58,412
and I meant it.
495
00:19:58,488 --> 00:20:00,541
Oh, hi. You must be Chris.
496
00:20:00,706 --> 00:20:02,200
Uh, scratch that.
497
00:20:02,308 --> 00:20:04,780
Hey. Who are you?
498
00:20:05,045 --> 00:20:06,370
I'm Tasha.
499
00:20:08,516 --> 00:20:11,680
Stay away from my granddaughter,
you cockeyed hooligan.
500
00:20:12,806 --> 00:20:15,140
Turns out older women
didn't like me either.
501
00:20:15,218 --> 00:20:18,740
FRM Team / Birdyben / Sixe
37160
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