Original subtitles

-I heard you can find my key. -Is this Booker?

I know your boyfriend wasn't there that night.

And I know who was.

I got the whole damn bloodbath recorded on a drone.

-[gunshot] -I need my inheritance.

Find it, and I'm your star witness.

-We should try again. -Royce offered me his sperm.

[Raqueeba] We are done treasure hunting

like we the Ghetto Goonies.

[Diarra] There's $100 million out there.

We need to tear down that wall.

I have been consulting with the top experts on my bus ride.

I got a line on some evidence that exonerates Chris.

Oh, my God, they're breaking into my shop!

Three huge boxes of single-donor virgin hair.

It's like somebody knew that they was here.

[Diarra] Why is it so sparse?

It's all Keke's fault. Pastor's ex-wife.

The revolution has to be funded.

Now you moving shit for the Vanguard?

-[Bailey] Om. -[Danger] Well, I can walk.

-I was about to head back. -Hop in.

You just entered into a contract.

You're going to find out who killed my nephew.

[Diarra] Where the fuck is my shooter, TikTok?

Don't let Booker see it.

He's skittish enough, and we need him.

Check the bathroom. Check upstairs.

-[Raqueeba] Booker. -Booker!

-Hands, hands, hands, hands! -Help! Help!

♪dramatic music playing♪

[Diarra] Confession:

getting in over your head is way easier than it looks.

You recognize this place?

It's where we buried that dead guy for you.

What the fuck? Stop, Om!

If I go out, I'm taking one of you with me.

-[Bailey] Stop! -[Danger] Back the fuck up.

-Put the gun down. -Back the fuck up.

Give us a minute. Go.

Jesus!

What happened?

We were good.

We've been good.

Sacred energy exchange and all that.

All right, it was a few pumps.

Let's not turn this shit into Romeo and Juliet.

Nice, Om.

You get that from the Bhagavad Gita?

For the last time, I had a balloon payment on the farm.

I needed cash.

My brother said he knew somebody in the Vanguard,

and they would help.

That's it. I'm being honest.

No, honesty is about consistency

between what goes through your brain,

what comes out your mouth, and what you do.

You know what I didn't do?

Ask any questions about the dead guy laying here

when Rory and Dirk brought you to me.

I helped you out because I had an instinct about who you were.

-But I did check up on you. -There it is.

Not a threat, just straight up blackmail.

No. I am trying to protect you.

I'm starting to get the feeling that

you don't even know what that's like.

Let me make it plain.

There's a price on your head from somebody named Pump.

You go back to Detroit, Kelvin...

it's a death sentence.

♪melancholic music playing♪

♪Spinnin' round and round♪

♪From sunup to sundown♪

♪Hanging on to your every word♪

♪Word♪

♪Hey, where you going so fast♪

♪How could I think this could last♪

♪Had me believin'♪

♪Believin'♪

[door clicks closed]

[Danger sighs]

[gun thuds]

You were right.

I'm not used to anybody really having my back.

Thank you.

♪♪♪

It's okay.

♪And I ain't comin, comin' back♪

♪Back to your arms...♪

Tell me you like it.

Tell me you like it.

I like it.

I like it.

♪...was wild and free♪

♪Now once upon a time is out the door♪

[crickets chirping]

What you thinking about?

[Danger] You say you checked up on me.

So you probably already know

what the streets used to call me.

They called me Danger.

Well, I don't know Danger.

But I know Om.

Danger never planted seeds.

He was a destroyer.

He took care of shit.

-Bay, these militia dudes-- -Don't worry about them.

I'm almost free. They just need one last favor.

-What kind of favor? -You never know with these guys.

Last year, they were digging holes on my property

-looking for treasure. -[Danger laughs]

-I'm not playing. -Bullshit.

Treasure. [laughs]

Could be anything.

Look, I've been on the other end of this.

It's never no last favor.

It's like breaking a horse.

They keep riding you till they own your ass.

There's only one way out from under there.

Leverage.

♪dramatic music playing♪

He was trapped.

There's no way that he could have lumbered his big ass

up out of here without either one of us knowing.

I'm texting, he is on his way. Sh...

[Diarra] He's got to be in here.

Turned out, Booker left me a goodbye note...

on the back of Cartier's very threatening note.

"See you cut another deal.

I'm not about to go down for your man.

Call my bro when you got my treasure."

Fuck.

He's gone.

No sign of him along the canals.

[Diarra] Booker and his drone footage

had slipped through my fingers.

Da-- damn!

Raqueeba, I thought I asked you to hide that.

I did.

I hid the note and the pickaxe

inside of the Fruity Pebbles box.

Fruity Pebbles?

Everybody loves Fruity Pebbles.

You hide shit in shredded wheat.

Think.

So let me get this straight.

Cartier's psycho ass wants a lead that we don't have.

Our only witness is in the wind.

And Chris said, "We need to talk."

Oh. Oh, dear God.

-Ooh. -Okay, okay.

I-- I feel like we're taking a turn.

-[Diarra groans] -So what? So what?

You need to talk. Sometimes you have to talk.

Anybody who says we need to talk while you're already talking

-is trying to dump you. -Not necessarily.

Oh, she definitely being dumped.

Okay, so now I got to get this nigga out of jail

so I can fucking kill him.

But aren't you mulling over Royce's sperm offer anyway?

He don't know that.

Okay, listen, if we're breaking up...

it has to be face to face while he's free.

Dee, he's giving you an out.

But I can't-- I can't take an out.

It was my idea to go into that Coney.

If he's in limbo, I'm in limbo.

Don't y'all get that?

And what am I supposed to tell people?

That I got dumped by a nigga in jail?

[grunts] I'm too pretty.

Cuz, you almost sounded really noble.

-Then you just kept on talking. -Okay, okay, okay, listen.

So we find the gold somehow,

and-- and-- and Booker will have to show back up.

And he talk about, "I've already processed that look." How?

I still got a hickey from this man on my left thigh.

How he already done processed the look?

Ew, what? Hickeys are so embarrassing.

Especially at our age.

Or any age, really.

He was wearing a turtleneck in the summertime.

That was the first time I wondered

if Ron's old ass had a hickey.

[Booker] Ron said, "Trust me."

And then I catch him on the phone

trying to sell it from up underneath me.

I know how to keep everybody going.

Go straight to hell with all them hussies.

So I guess them old chicks don't mind embarrassing themselves.

[Diarra] But who was Ron's girlfriend?

I thought, "What if Booker hadn't been the only one

with a secret girlfriend who had an interest in antiques?

And I figured, Ron's might have been

the one woman who recently told me a bold-faced lie.

Records show

Duncan Duckett was an established business owner

in Paradise Valley.

Devoted family man. Prominent deacon.

[Diarra] Who killed these two?

[Booker] Some old lady in a mask.

Came in through the back.

[Cartier] You looking for a bitch-ass nigga

or a female.

[Booker echoing] Some old lady in a mask.

Complimentary snow globe.

[Diarra] I just needed something to connect them.

Find my armoire.

[Diarra] This early bird special Bonnie and Clyde,

set me up from the beginning.

My dumb ass went into the belly of the beast asking for help.

Of course, she threw me off the scent of the treasure.

We might not need Booker's footage.

I know who the Coney Killer is.

[knocking on door]

-Open up. -[knocking on door]

Open this door.

Open up. I know you did it.

Damn, your booty call outfit could use work.

This ain't no booty call, you sick-ass freak.

You know, I was taking a bath, right?

And I was trying to talk myself out of confronting you,

but my best friend has no impulse control

and is rubbing off on me.

I'm-- I'm lost. Like, what are you looking for?

What are you looking for? Negro, my hair.

Yeah. You stole my Chinese hair.

-Your hair? -Yeah.

Why would I help you get it out of customs to steal it?

Right? It's the perfect alibi.

Yo, I just came home from a concert.

Cut the whole band.

Well, I can get them on the phone if you want.

What, you want to check my place?

I do.

See, I thought you was half normal.

But you out your fucking mind.

-Females in Detroit. -[door shuts closed]

[Aja grunts]

Shit. Damn.

[cell phone chimes]

♪tense music playing♪

[Ron] This Diarra girl, she found Deonte.

She ought to be able to find that damn armoire.

For the last time, it is not an armoire.

And she better be quick.

Your nephew is selling it.

And he is clever.

He's advertising it on Reddit.

I expect we're going to have competition.

When negroes find out

there is gold underneath the city,

it is gonna be chaos.

I should probably be at that auction.

They will see that Mac Daddy,

Errol Flynn shit coming from a mile away.

Come on now.

Booker will not see this coming at all.

-[Ron laughs] -[Erma clicks tongue]

You gonna give an old man a hickey?

And that is why he was wearing a turtleneck in the summertime.

Bam.

So you think he fucking whoever pen we got?

Like, am I fucking BIC? I don't-- I don't get it.

And old people really out here sucking necks?

Well, friend, old people doing everything we doing,

just slower and with more breaks.

They ain't doing what we doing. [laughs]

Put a finger in it. Ah.

Make sure you find out if he fucks goats.

He knew way too much about it.

[Tea] Ooh.

All right, y'all, So museum lady's put me to sleep

on many a field trip.

-Are we sure she's a killer? -She gotta be working Ron.

Think about this. She the history expert.

She know about all the antiques.

Uh-uh, Ron was the one who came in,

"My desk, my desk," desperate for his shit back.

So he sends me and Chris after it.

But they also had a plan B.

Erma crashing the Coney auction.

No, Ron chasing pussy?

Factual, I'll give you that, right?

Trying to kill his own nephew? Nah.

Yeah, we think the Erma lady the real villain.

We? We think?

Okay, tell me three things about Mac

that don't have to do with his dick.

-Go. -I know plenty.

-Okay. -Um...

-I work at the plant. -You work at the plant.

-I got a dog. -You got a dog?

-That's what I thought. -Um, friend,

maybe we should get back

to trying to find this $100 million.

Because with my weave-napping, I'm 60K in the hole.

Excuse me, do any of y'all remember us

hitting a brick wall?

And all of y'all said that the fat lady was singing.

Yeah, I don't really hear her no more.

I mean, you got us going to church.

Maybe we all got a little more faith.

So are y'all trying to say

that we actually are the Ghetto Goonies?

I'm not claiming we're ghetto, but...

[Diarra] Once folks got the idea of $100 mil in their brain,

it was harder than they thought to let it go.

I got Sela's tuition,

and I always wanted to go on the Tom Joyner cruise.

I called off work this week.

Shit, I thought we was finna get paid.

I can't afford to keep eating here.

[Diarra] The church was a dead end.

And without Booker's drone,

we needed someone who could finger Erma,

someone who might have done it already,

slower, and with more breaks.

We needed Ron.

Y'all, Mac, you need to order light.

Like a teeny tiny bird, look at the appetizers.

Because we need to focus on this case.

And our suspects, I think that Ron is hiding out at Erma's.

Or he's her prisoner.

What makes you think he's the victim?

Nah, Ron got some issues. He's victim-like.

[Diarra] I was starting to realize

why Ron was stricken with gold fever, too.

I checked the strip club, casino, the track.

You mean he's a drunk with a gambling problem.

If he's an addict, he can be controlled easily.

I got a crackhead uncle who will do anything for $5.

So maybe we get Ron to flip on Erma.

-And go to the cops. -We got to find him first.

Yeah, but what about the treasure, though, Dee?

Aja, first we get Chris out.

Free Chris. Remember him?

Your cousin, my boyfriend.

Then we can focus on the treasure.

Jesus.

Shit, he could sit in the county for a couple hundred million.

[Aja] Crazy.

♪suspenseful music playing♪

Hey. Check out my event this week.

Oh.

I wasn't interested in his event.

But I realized if I was going to take Erma down,

I needed to get on her social calendar.

♪upbeat music playing♪

I knew I needed to stop confronting bad guys head on.

But we needed to find Ron fast.

And I was sure he was hiding somewhere inside this house.

We just had to get inside.

So we all got into position for the Garden Party-play.

♪♪♪

The Preservation Council gathered every month

to pat themselves on the back

for protecting Detroit's historical sites

and to preview their museum's fancy collection.

Rich people eating cheese always think

they're saving the goddamn world.

- Oh! [laughs] - Oh. [laughs] Whoops.

-[sighs] Erma Beaumont. -Miss Brickland.

Yes.

I didn't realize that you were

on the Preservation Council's VIP list.

I'm not.

Sorry for crashing this rousing shindig.

A couple notes.

Maybe you should get one of those jazz singers

that makes all the ugly faces.

You know, ba-da, ba-da-da-da-da-da-da, ba-ba-ba.

I don't know why they always do that.

-But I can never look away. -Mm.

I am entertaining.

So please, my dear, go enjoy yourself.

-Mingle. -You bring a date?

Because I hear dating over a certain age can be murder.

And at your age, I imagine

it's like shooting fish in a barrel.

[Diarra] I was starting to get the sense

that this bitch was taunting me.

You know, there's a video of the Coney Killings.

Maybe some of your guests might want to see it.

It might really liven things up.

Why don't we go talk in the house?

Oh, why don't we?

♪tense music playing♪

-Um, excuse me. -Ma'am?

Could you please tell me where the bathroom is?

I don't know if it's over here or not.

-No, it's in here. -Oh, excuse me.

[Erma] This way.

So...

you live here alone?

I prefer things over people.

I know that's awful to say.

But things are perfect

in a way that we can never be.

[clears throat] This way.

♪♪♪

I'm sure I don't know what the fuck you're talking about,

but I would love to see that video.

I don't have it.

It's someplace safe.

So who's boosting who?

Nigga, are you serious?

-What do you think? Come on. -Oh, I'm boosting you?

-Yes. -Oh, so you're the bottom.

Nigga, what did I tell you about that bullshit?

You know one of the great benefits of getting older?

Yes, the men stop flirting,

but the world begins to underestimate you.

They think, "Aw, there goes

that cute, harmless old Black lady.

Lucky for you, I don't think that.

But you have underestimated me.

I have seasoned to a flavor

that you can't even imagine.

[Diarra] There it was.

Confirmation Ron was here. Maybe upstairs...

You have no idea what I'm capable of.

-[metallic thudding] -[Diarra] ...or down.

-You see anything? -Hold on.

-Oh, hey. -I don't see nobody.

We were just leaving.

You don't have that video tape.

Your friends are being thrown out as we speak.

[Erma clicks tongue]

Oh, yeah, that's a really nice...

-suit color. -No!

Ron! It's me, it's Diarra.

She's playing you. Can you hear me?

I need your help. I need you to testify.

Ron!

-Go get her. -[Diarra] I need your help.

Ron! [panting]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

Ow! You mint chip mother--

Believe it or not, this was all part of the plan.

--Fucker!

[militia guy] He tried to put cement on the pontoon.

[laughter]

-Don't ever fish with him. -Hey, boys.

-Bailey! -How you doing?

-Oh, you know. -What you up to?

-Playing euchre. -Ooh, I got next.

♪suspenseful music playing♪

[sighs] This shit just might work.

[Diarra] As we expected, Erma locked every door and window.

I need you to testify! Ron!

Ron!

But the bitch had actually underestimated me.

[lock beeps]

-[camera shutter clicking] -Leverage like a motherfucker.

I got your ass.

[Diarra] Ron?

It's Diarra.

Oh, come on, Erma, what the fuck?

♪♪♪

No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.

[keypad clacking]

[distorted] Hello?

What?

Oh, this bitch is crazy.

[distorted] Oh, this bitch is crazy.

[panting]

♪somber music playing♪

How has she been a step behind me this whole time?

A dark shadow nipping at my heels,

anticipating my every move.

[paper rustling]

What the fuck is this shit?

[camera shutter clicks]

[Diarra] "I'm asking for additional funding

for a special project which will yield

a windfall beyond imagining."

No shit, bitch.

Finally, an antique I recognized,

a landline.

[phone beeping]

[phone ringing]

Y'all hear that?

I didn't hear nothing.

[Danger breathing deeply]

♪dramatic music playing♪

[Abigail] Who the hell left the phone off the hook?

[militia guy] I don't know. Probably Rudy.

-Hello? -[Diarra breathing shakily]

Hello?

-[distorted] Hello? -Collector.

We got everything we can out of him.

Did you find anything?

Did you find it?

Hello?

[Diarra] Erma's weird-ass council

had someone hunting the treasure.

[clattering]

And there was no way the Ghetto Goonies

would let them get there first.

-[footsteps approaching] -[lock beeps]

[Erma] What, another hold up at the port?

[sighs]

I got clients in Luxembourg waiting.

You know...

Why don't you just pay customs more?

Um, hold on.

♪tense music playing♪

[gun clicks]

She was here.

Yep.

No.

Let her cook.

Yeah, we'll kill her after she finds my gold.

[door creaks]

[militia guy] Hey!

[militia guy 2] What the hell was that?

What the fuck are you doing?

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, it's cool.

He's with me. He's with me.

You said you needed more muscle around here.

Meet Om.

[Diarra] In chess, moving two pieces at once

is called castling.

We know Erma's going for the gold.

So to catch her, we need to get there first.

[Aja] Right, because if she get 100 mil,

she might disappear forever.

[Tea] So we run two plays at once.

-I like it. -[switch clicks]

♪Let me kiss myself♪

♪Tell the truth, I don't need nobody else...♪

[host] All right, all right, all right.

Five minutes till showtime, everyone.

♪...my egos♪ ♪Let me kiss myself, myself♪

♪Tell the truth, let me kiss myself...♪

[Diarra] We'd struck out finding Ron,

so if I was gonna run two plays at once,

I needed someone who knew not just about games,

but sports.

♪[indistinct lyrics]♪

You smell good.

Thank you. So do you.

Thanks.

You're out of favors.

So this is a date.

I ordered the crab cakes.

You could call it whatever you want

as long as you found something.

-What's that? -You know what?

Eat first. Come on.

[Diarra laughs]

-Mmm. -How about that?

-[Diarra] Mmm. -Mmm.

-That is really good. -Hmm.

[Diarra] I'd been racing against the clock to free Chris.

Hadn't had a single moment to feel human.

Pre-ordered the margarita.

-Oh. -Drink.

-Oh, I'm drinking. -Drinking.

Mmm.

So...

you find something or not, Frederick?

The first move of castling,

dig up dirt on Erma.

Did you find anything to use to make a case against her.

Didn't find much on Erma Beaumont...

-Okay. -...But I did find something

on Erma Roy.

-[Diarra] Oh! -Straight up con woman.

Arrested for solicitation in the Cadillac Hotel in '73.

In '75, walked out of a Woolworth wearing a muumuu

with a TV between her legs.

-Wait, what? -Right.

What kind of bionic thigh muscles does this bitch have?

Her jacket goes on and on.

This is a hell of a rap sheet.

Oh, you look pretty.

You look handsome.

Your arms are very sexy and it's distracting.

So, Erma Roy was a booster and a hoe, huh?

Right. Finally married an antiques dealer.

Now he's a dead antiques dealer.

Gee, I wonder how that happened.

And she, uh, inherited his whole collection.

I'm sensing you still see me as a brother with no bed frame.

You know, I got a bed frame now.

I don't want to hear about your bed frame.

-West Elm. -I don't care.

I want to hear about why an antiques enthusiast

might have a shit ton of custom certificates.

Well, custom certs are government issue.

So they could have been counterfeit.

You know, the paper did

-a story on this last year. -Mm-hmm?

Art and antiques wash more money than the cartel.

[Erma] I got clients in Luxembourg waiting.

[Diarra] It was dawning on me

that Erma's stuffy preservation council

could have been a front for her international money laundering,

a business she might have learned

from her dearly departed husband.

You want to hear a secret?

Yes.

This dingbat is the Coney Killer.

So, all of this is about freeing Deonte?

Yes. She's my suspect.

Does that mean you and Mr. Alias are going the distance?

It means...

I can't break up with a man in jail.

[host] I'm looking for a Royce and Diarra.

Can a Royce and Diarra please...

Yo, what the fuck is this?

You were absolutely right, Royce.

This is a date.

And the second move of castling,

put my other piece in position to beat Erma to the gold.

We'd hit a wall at Trinity Rose,

but our gold fever drove us to hatch

another mission impossible.

The Pastor Trap.

Wait, I should go back.

[Tea] This is Keke. That's our target.

[Wanda] The pastor's ex-wife.

She abandoned Trinity when they split.

Lots of folks ain't been back since.

Wait, hold on. Let me get this straight.

So, we are sure that Dunc's clue is under the church?

Yes. Maybe even the whole treasure,

'cause think about it.

What's a better hiding spot for gold

than under the watchful eye of Jesus?

-Hell yeah. -So, you think

if we get this Keke lady and the pastor back together,

then she'll perform at Trinity?

And her gospel belt

will help bring in the missing congregation.

So, the church service will be so loud

that we can bust down that wall and get that treasure.

-Yes! -Oh, this is simple as hell.

-I like it. -It's a Pastor Trap.

It's like a parent trap, but it's the pastors.

All right, so-- so how do we start?

All right, y'all. So, this is our arena.

[host] Welcome to Crash & Yearn.

[Diarra] Public dating had become quite the thing

with the downtown hipsters.

Watching singles mingle was more entertaining

than any blood sport.

[host] Normally, we do first dates.

So, this one is a bit unusual

because Diarra and Royce have dated before.

[audience whooping and applauding]

Why the fuck am I up here?

I will explain it all later.

I need you to play along. Be romantic.

Let's do it.

[Royce] My dental hygienist is out there!

So what?

Keke Thompson. I'm the manager.

-I'm the one that emailed you. -Yes!

[Diarra] We offer Keke an opportunity

to headline a fake gospel residency.

So, tell me about this "Jesus Lounge".

You two seem kind of skittish.

Are you sure you wanna give this another shot?

[Diarra] I was sure.

And I paid this bozo 100 bucks to ensure one.

100%. I mean, the dating scene in the D is trash.

You know, it is heinous, barren, and ghetto.

So, you know, we decided we might wanna try

spinning the block. [laughs]

We need to inception Keke.

Plant the idea in her head that it's okay

-to spin the block. -How we gonna do that?

Look, I don't spin the block under any circumstances.

You gotta open her head up.

Like the Matrix, screw the little thing in the back,

put the idea in, hope it stick.

Or, we could use power of suggestion.

I wasn't thinking about ice cream

until I saw that truck.

Yeah, but how are we supposed to plant an idea

inside her head without her realizing it?

[all] Hmm.

-Keke Thompson. -Yes.

Hi! I used to go to Trinity Rose.

Girl, it has not been the same without you.

-[both laugh] -You know that.

Check out my new mixtape, Spin the Block.

Available on iTunes.

Okay, here, take that LP.

Get y'all one, two, Spin the Block.

Here you go, Spin the Block.

I'll have the Spin the Block.

It's real good.

Oh! Uh, I'll have a white Zin.

We need more than the power of suggestion.

This is a mature Christian couple.

Like, we need to dig deeper.

Find out what the real issues were.

Four years of marriage ended over four songs.

-Oh! -His ass is so stubborn.

He had me singing the same four songs the same way

every communion.

A 100-year-old set list.

I mean, I ain't gotta tell you, girl.

-You went to Trinity. -Yeah, I know,

it was like real repetitive.

But that seems like such a small thing to end a marriage over.

Yeah. It was so small,

it made me realize how little he thought of me.

I mean, he couldn't move one inch?

Couldn't value my contribution?

-Girl, fuck that. -Ooh!

♪I hate him♪

Hate list is long. Cheers to the hate!

-Cheers. -[Aja sighs]

[Aja] This is gonna be harder than we thought.

It might all come down to you and Royce.

The only reason why I joined you up here

was to get some damn answers.

Now I asked you a direct question,

and you playing games.

I'm not playing games.

I'm taking the idea of spinning the block very seriously.

Look, I asked her to go half on a baby,

and she won't give me an answer.

[Diarra] Somehow, in setting a trap for Keke,

I'd put myself in the hot seat.

Diarra, where are we at with that?

Okay, can you just... shh. Excuse me, excuse me.

What are you doing?

I said romantic, not real.

Answer me or I'm getting off this stage.

You ain't getting off this stage.

-Watch me. -Okay, honestly...

You know what? It's too pragmatic.

It's almost too modern.

It's like the cutest babies,

they come from hot, sweaty sex, you know?

Not boring baby business deals.

So let's make hot, sweaty sex.

-Ah, I'm too old for-- -[crowd cheering]

Hey, hey, shut up. Y'all, stop.

I'm too old for that.

I do need to be pragmatic.

Okay, now you're talking out both sides of your face, Dee.

I don't feel like you see me or anything that I want.

I feel like you just want to put a baby in me.

I do want to put a baby in you.

[audience whooping, laughing]

Goddamn, I love this shit.

Look, I'm willing to go half on the baby...

but keeping it a buck, the whole baby mama thing

seems kind of stressful.

I want all of you.

Even though I'm learning,

that's gonna be a-- a fuckin' lot.

End of the day...

I just want to come home to my family...

and fucking snuggle.

-Now you. -[Diarra chuckles]

What do you want?

I want that,

and I need my relationship to be pragmatic...

and sweaty.

Two things, same time.

[Royce] I'll raise you one.

I know your mind.

I know your heart.

I know your body.

[audience oohing]

Let me take care of all three things.

Same time.

[Diarra] Thing was,

I loved a king who understood the holy trinity.

So date me...

slow down...

see me,

and date me.

Done.

[Diarra] And that's how Royce restored my faith

that even in our fucked up world

two people could create a perfect one.

[host] Okay, so you feel like giving Royce a kiss?

Yes?

[audience member] Yes, yes, yes.

-[host] Or no? -[audience member] Yes.

-Yes. -[host] Yes? Or no?

Hell yeah.

[audience cheering and applauding]

[crowd cheering]

I guess familiar penis has its advantages.

Can I refill your drink?

I'll have a Spin the Block.

Two Spin the Blocks, please.

♪Thinking about you all day♪

♪Love me, thinking about you...♪

He's always been the worst person in the group.

-You're lying. -By far.

-Best dancer. -Uh-uh.

Well...

Thanks for driving me home.

-[phone chimes] -No problem.

Oh, God, it's Tea.

Okay, moment of truth. I'm so scared.

Here we go.

[Tea] She's at the pastor's.

They argued, he groveled,

and now they're becoming one flesh, so to speak.

Oh!

[Tea] I might be going to hell for these pics.

Okay. Oh.

Wow.

-[Royce] Damn. -[Diarra] Very flexible pair.

Okay, we gotta celebrate.

-We got to. -One drink.

-All right. -One drink?

-Yes. Okay. -Yes, yes, yes, yes.

Um, how'd you know he'd take her back?

Oh, I sent Pastor Cecil on the date from hell.

Suck on my titties, you bald motherfucker.

Bark like a dog.

And, you know, he was still wearing his wedding ring

on Sunday, so I figured he was still just a little bit sprung.

Hey, you be careful with my complimentary snow globe.

Just cause they bumpin' bellies don't mean they back together.

Oh, they getting back together.

I inceptioned the shit out of this.

-[chuckles] -Okay. [clears throat]

How much of tonight was real?

All of it.

But you see that bench right there?

Chris picked out those pillows.

And I got a whole row of his gym shoes lying in my bedroom.

This is his house.

-I can't. -Nah, I get it.

I get it. I get it. Yeah.

-Gotta take it slow, right? -Yes.

And, I mean, I-- I wasn't really trying to hit anyway.

I just drove you home to be nice.

Nobody does anything just to be nice.

Complimentary snow globe.

[Diarra] How has she been one step behind me this whole time?

In order to understand the map,

we need to understand the man who made it.

[Mac] The dead guy, Tommy's gun.

[Diarra] His name was Duncan Duckett.

[woman] They say the stars

don't even come out at night in Brightmoor.

[Diarra] I'm not scared of Brightmoor.

I'm gonna need you to take that drone footage to the cops.

-[Raqueeba] Booker! -Booker!

You don't have that video tape.

[Diarra] Our only witness is in the wind.

It was almost as if she were in the room with us.

-Maybe I'll-- -Shh.

Turned out I had a bug up my ass.

[mouthing words silently]

[Mac] What is this?

Man, who is this smart lobster looking-ass nigga?

[mouthing words silently]

And that's all we would say to each other that night.

[Mac] That's what these women do.

Soon as you go to jail, a muscle nigga in the crib.

[Ron breathing heavily]

Your girl, Diarra, she came through.

I told you.

The treasure is at Trinity Rose.

I told you, she could do it.

If I get my treasure tomorrow,

all your debts will be cleared.

And you can go free.

And my cut?

What-- what about my cut?

You're my backup plan if the rednecks fuck up.

And you will convince-- look at me,

you will convince Diarra to trust you, yeah?

Trust me, yes, yeah.

But I still get my cut, girl.

I sacrificed a lot.

I earned that gold.

[screaming]

[Ron whimpers]

I think you need just a little bit more time

with your old friend.

Oh, no, no, Erma. Don't--

Look, listen to me. You will take what I give you

and you will be grateful for it.

Okay?

Now, be a good boy, Ronald.

And fetch Mama her prize.

[Ron] I'm not fetching you anything.

-You what? -I'm not fetching you anything!

[groaning in pain]

No!

[applause]

[upbeat gospel music playing]

♪Show up♪

♪He will show up on time♪

♪Show up♪

♪Show up♪

[Diarra] The return of Keke to Trinity Rose

spread like the gospel.

Okay, Tea, keep your eyes peeled for Erma.

On it.

[Diarra] Erma's bug told us

we might be expecting company.

With all that joyful noise,

no one paid close attention to us...

unless we wanted them to.

Oh, I don't feel too good. I...

[retching]

[Diarra] First, we kept Sister Wanda occupied.

Somebody get a mop!

I just saw some delinquents

spray painting in the parking lot.

Get 'em, brother.

God bless you.

♪Show up♪

♪♪♪

♪Show up♪

♪Show up♪

♪Show up♪

♪Show up♪

♪Show up♪

[audience cheering and applauding]

Trinity was passed on to me from my father.

And some days, I felt the weight of that calling on my life.

But God reminded me that my wife

also has a calling on her life.

And I must be as obedient to hers as she's been to mine.

So we break tradition.

Today, Keke will sing...

whatever the hell the spirit moves her to sing.

[Cecil] The Incomparable...

Keke Thompson!

[audience applauding]

[tense music playing]

[Diarra coughing]

♪♪♪

♪This little light of mine♪

♪I'm gonna let it shine♪

♪Let it shine♪

[Mac] This is crazy.

[Diarra] I know.

[Mac] Yeah, let's bust this shit down.

Hold on, wait, wait, wait.

I think this is like a puzzle.

So...

[machinery rattling]

[screaming]

-[Diarra] Oh! -[screaming]

-Shit! -The fuck did you just do?

I'm sorry, it's booby trapped.

I must've pressed the wrong brick.

[screaming]

♪I know some of y'all are tired of the same old♪

♪Same old, same old thing♪

♪[indistinct lyrics]♪

♪[indistinct lyrics]♪

-Okay, I gotta pull it out. -[muttering weakly]

Okay? So just breathe.

I'mma do it on three, okay?

-Alright, let's do it on three. -Okay.

-One. -One.

-Just breathe. -Two.

-Two. -[Mac screaming]

-See anything suspicious? -Yeah.

First Lady of Holy Redemption. Wearing my Chinese hair

Oh, so we finna jump this church lady?

Nah, nah. Let her make it.

She one of Mary's clients.

Probably the only lady in the D that got my bundles

before they got stolen.

I would've definitely bought some.

I know God got a plan, but I don't know what it is.

♪Ezekiel saw the wheel♪

Look, F-Mob's here.

Jesus, where's Erma?

♪ Ezekiel saw the wheel♪

♪Way up [way up]♪

♪Way up [way up]♪

[music playing faintly]

[Diarra] I knew Erma would show up to make a play for that gold.

So I might've mentioned to Cartier

that the Coney Killer would be in the building.

And as expected, he sent soldiers.

So you just wounding niggas left and right, huh?

You not gonna let that go, huh?

No, girl, I'm not.

Look, I shouldn't have invited Royce back to the house, but I--

shit, I've got gold fever and baby fever,

and I'm, you know, I'm-- shit, I'm feverish.

It's making me crazy.

Please don't say anything to Chris.

Well, I already told Chris.

He hung himself in his cell last night.

You know what?

You going straight to hell.

Look, Dee, you dating the muscle arm nigga...

before you break up with cuz,

it's just you doing shit in a fucked up order.

Your cousin is trying to break up with me.

Okay, did he tell you that? Wait, stop.

Hold on, go back. What did you just say?

I said he hung himself in his cell.

Not that.

After that, what did you say?

That you doing shit in a fucked up order.

In a fucked up order.

We need to do this in the right order.

Hold on.

Hang in there, okay?

So Dunc wanted his sons to become masons first,

then men of God, and then get the treasure.

So the right order-- the right order is crucial.

-So what's the order? -It's something

he would have wanted them to learn in church

to keep them from winding up like Cain and Abel.

♪Way up in the middle of the air♪

She is really killing it up there.

-[Mac] She is. -God.

Them hymns go crazy.

Hymns-- [gasps]

Oh, shit.

[Diarra and Mac] The same four songs.

Okay, I get it, I get it.

This one is "Wade In The Water".

"Ezekiel Saw The Wheel".

It must correspond to the original hymn order.

-You still have the program? -Yeah.

[Diarra] Wait, wait, wait. Wait, just take a breath, okay?

[Diarra groans]

So the first one is "This Little Light Of Mine".

It's gotta be-- it's gotta be the candle flame, right?

-Don't just be pressing stuff. -I gotta press it.

-Oh, my God. -Okay, one, two,

oh, fuck, three.

-[heavy clunk] -[gasps, grunts]

[machinery whirring]

[sighs, laughs]

Oh, shit.

Okay, okay, that worked.

What's the next one?

♪Amazing grace♪

♪How sweet the sound♪

[vocalizing]

You all right, baby?

-Yeah. -Good.

That's Miss Buford's daughter.

[Raqueeba] Oh.

That buss down got her acting brand new.

She acting high as a Georgia Pine.

She is.

-But her hair look good. -Yeah, she slay.

"Ezekiel Saw The Wheel".

Here we go. [grunts]

[machinery whirrs, thumps]

Okay, we're good. Okay.

And this one's gotta be "Amazing Grace", right?

I don't know, Dee.

I don't speak damn "negro-glyphics."

I don't know what that shit say.

[machinery whirring]

[Diarra gasps]

[Diarra gasps]

-[whoops] -[whooping echoes]

Mac-- Oh, whoa, boo, love.

Come on, come on. Okay, tell Raqueeba

she's gotta take you to the hospital

and-- and Tea, tell Tea to come down here.

-Okay, ready? -It's all right,

I handled that shit like a G.

Like a straight gangster.

Come on, baby, you gotta get up though.

Ready? On three, one.

-[groaning] -Two.

Come on, y'all, let's sing!

Woo!

♪Jesus went my way♪

♪Jesus went my way♪

♪You been good to me♪

♪You been good to me♪

♪Jesus went my way♪

♪Jesus went my way♪

♪Jesus went my way♪

Blair, Michigan?

♪You're looking good, church, good♪

♪Showing up good enough to me♪

♪You're looking good, church, good♪

♪Showing up good enough to me♪

♪You're looking good, church, good♪

♪Showing up good enough to me♪

-[zapping] -[Tea groans]

♪Good, showing up good enough to me♪

[gospel music fades]

[tense music playing]

♪♪♪

♪I can hold you tight♪

♪All day and night♪

[mysterious music playing]

I told you I needed my armoire back.

Ron, after all this...

can we at least agree that it's a goddamn desk?

-[scoffs] -I'm disappointed in you.

You really got me with the whole family heirloom thing.

I was in a bit of a gambling hole.

And Erma's deep money laundering pockets got you out, huh?

She bought my debt,

and then I figured that the desk...

-Thank you. -...Would be my way

to pay her back.

So what, you just...

you let Erma walk me and Chris into a nightmare?

She's a killer.

Don't have to worry about her anymore.

What is that supposed to mean?

The blood on his shirt said they weren't Bonnie and Clyde.

This was a deal gone bad.

[Ron groaning]

-You want more of that? -[Ron] No.

All right, then, you gonna go back in the box?

[Ron growls]

Ah!

[labored breathing]

[yelps]

[screaming triumphantly]

Chris is martyring himself.

I need you to go to the cops and tell them about Erma.

Yeah, sure. I need the scroll.

[scoffs]

I'm not giving you shit, Ron.

I knew where the treasure was a long time ago.

Oh yeah, yeah, but Dunc,

oh, he's a crafty son of a bitch.

I knew I had to play along with it.

-Whoa, whoa. -[gate creaking]

- [Ron] Let me handle this. -[Diarra] Oh, my God.

[Ron] These militia folk are dangerous.

-[Diarra] What is this? -[Ron] I work for the Collector.

So just let me take care of this.

You guys, ma'am, back off.

I don't take orders from spooks.

Hello?

[Diarra] I realized we'd spoken before.

She was Erma's hired muscle.

You know, I think you might be wrong about that.

Give us what you found. Now.

You have three seconds.

I'm not giving you shit.

I don't even like this motherfucker. Shoot him.

-One. -Tell her something, damn it!

Fuck you, Ron.

You're the one who got us into this shit.

-Two. -Shoot him!

I don't give a fuck! Shoot him.

-[indistinct] -Okay, okay.

Shit, okay. Calm down.

Here, just take the scroll. It's-- go to--

-Go to Union Trust! -Here you go.

It's an old bank.

It's probably a safety deposit box.

Knowing Dunc, I guess it's number two.

Thanks a hundred million.

-[gunshot] -[Diarra screaming]

[breathing heavily]

Close this shit up.

I don't want them to find 'em till it smells.

Slippery little cunt wants to die in a tomb? Fine.

[Diarra] Like I said,

getting in over your head is easier than it looks.

[Abigail whistling "Dixie"]

-[heavy door slams shut] -[whistling continues]