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1
00:00:03,169 --> 00:00:05,620
Cheers is filmedbefore a live studio audience.
2
00:00:05,655 --> 00:00:07,956
WOODY:
Carla, you look spiffy.
3
00:00:07,990 --> 00:00:10,725
You going out tonight?
Yeah, Eddie and I
are catching a movie.
4
00:00:10,759 --> 00:00:12,110
This is his last night in town.
5
00:00:12,144 --> 00:00:14,446
He's going out on the road again
with the ice show.
6
00:00:14,480 --> 00:00:15,113
Uh-oh.
7
00:00:15,147 --> 00:00:16,665
What's that supposed to mean?
8
00:00:16,699 --> 00:00:18,099
Oh, nothing.
9
00:00:18,133 --> 00:00:20,718
Well, you know,
I get this image of, you know,
10
00:00:20,752 --> 00:00:22,820
chorus girls in skimpy costumes,
11
00:00:22,854 --> 00:00:24,205
you know,
skating around,
12
00:00:24,239 --> 00:00:26,507
lonely husband on the road,
far away
13
00:00:26,542 --> 00:00:28,710
from his, uh,
connubial connubials,
14
00:00:28,744 --> 00:00:30,511
if you know what I mean.
15
00:00:30,546 --> 00:00:32,097
Well,
16
00:00:32,131 --> 00:00:33,281
y-you're not worried?
17
00:00:33,315 --> 00:00:34,366
Not at all.
18
00:00:34,400 --> 00:00:35,666
I know my Eddie,
19
00:00:35,701 --> 00:00:37,752
and I trust him completely.
20
00:00:37,787 --> 00:00:40,889
He is the sweetest,
most faithful, loving husband in
21
00:00:40,923 --> 00:00:42,106
the whole world, and I
22
00:00:42,141 --> 00:00:43,859
thank God every day
he married me.
23
00:00:43,893 --> 00:00:45,994
If ever there
was a one-woman man,
24
00:00:46,028 --> 00:00:47,662
it's Eddie LeBec.
25
00:00:47,697 --> 00:00:49,197
Hey, Carla,
what movie you going to see?
26
00:00:49,231 --> 00:00:50,866
Fatal Attraction.
27
00:00:55,270 --> 00:00:58,940
( piano plays )
28
00:00:58,974 --> 00:01:01,542
� Making your way
in the world today �
29
00:01:01,577 --> 00:01:04,545
� Takes everything you've got
30
00:01:04,580 --> 00:01:07,381
� Taking a break
from all your worries �
31
00:01:07,416 --> 00:01:10,484
� Sure would help a lot
32
00:01:10,519 --> 00:01:16,024
� Wouldn't you like
to get away? �
33
00:01:16,058 --> 00:01:18,860
� Sometimes you want to go
34
00:01:18,895 --> 00:01:23,482
� Where everybody
knows your name �
35
00:01:23,516 --> 00:01:28,720
� And they're always glad
you came �
36
00:01:28,754 --> 00:01:30,722
� You want to be
where you can see �
37
00:01:30,756 --> 00:01:33,725
� Our troubles
are all the same �
38
00:01:33,759 --> 00:01:38,497
� You want to be where everybody
knows your name �
39
00:01:38,531 --> 00:01:41,633
� You want to go
where people know �
40
00:01:41,667 --> 00:01:43,768
� People are all the same
41
00:01:43,803 --> 00:01:48,339
� You want to go where
everybody knows your name. �
42
00:02:09,345 --> 00:02:10,945
Good evening, everyone.
43
00:02:10,979 --> 00:02:12,914
You'll be glad to know
I decided to take your advice
44
00:02:12,948 --> 00:02:15,083
and become more dynamic.
45
00:02:15,117 --> 00:02:18,469
I have just left a seminar
that has changed my life.
46
00:02:18,504 --> 00:02:20,004
In a few short hours,
47
00:02:20,039 --> 00:02:22,907
I have become the essence
of self assertiveness.
48
00:02:22,941 --> 00:02:23,891
Five.
49
00:02:23,926 --> 00:02:25,243
ALL:
Four,
50
00:02:25,277 --> 00:02:27,479
three, two, one!
51
00:02:27,513 --> 00:02:29,847
( cheering )
52
00:02:29,882 --> 00:02:32,516
What's going on here?
53
00:02:32,551 --> 00:02:34,652
What's going on?
54
00:02:34,687 --> 00:02:37,371
Hey, I run this place.
What's happening?
55
00:02:37,405 --> 00:02:39,690
( cheering continues )
56
00:02:39,725 --> 00:02:41,359
( whistling )
57
00:02:41,394 --> 00:02:42,394
NORM:
Yeah!
58
00:02:42,428 --> 00:02:43,862
If somebody doesn't tell me
59
00:02:43,896 --> 00:02:46,097
what's going on,
I am gonna start crying.
60
00:02:46,131 --> 00:02:47,399
SAM:
Aw,
61
00:02:47,433 --> 00:02:49,200
we're sorry. Uh, we didn't know
you were here.
62
00:02:49,234 --> 00:02:51,502
Today is our
anniversary.
63
00:02:51,537 --> 00:02:52,270
CLIFF:
This is the day,
two years ago
64
00:02:52,304 --> 00:02:53,554
where Cheers beat
65
00:02:53,589 --> 00:02:55,023
that scourge down the road,
66
00:02:55,057 --> 00:02:56,891
Gary's Old Town Tavern,
in bowling!
67
00:02:56,926 --> 00:02:58,926
( cheering, whooping )
68
00:02:58,961 --> 00:03:00,628
That's-That's
the big deal?
69
00:03:00,662 --> 00:03:02,196
It's the only time
we ever won anything.
70
00:03:02,231 --> 00:03:03,798
I take it that they've
beaten us at things.
71
00:03:03,833 --> 00:03:04,799
NORM:
At everything.
72
00:03:04,834 --> 00:03:06,935
Touch football, softball, darts,
73
00:03:06,969 --> 00:03:09,403
ugliest toes, you name it...
74
00:03:09,438 --> 00:03:11,940
I think the current
tally is 173 to one,
75
00:03:11,974 --> 00:03:14,809
but we are presently
on a winning streak.
76
00:03:14,844 --> 00:03:16,410
( cheering )
CARLA:
Yeah!
77
00:03:16,444 --> 00:03:17,879
We're number one!
78
00:03:17,913 --> 00:03:19,497
ALL:
We're number one!
79
00:03:19,531 --> 00:03:20,548
We're number one!
80
00:03:20,583 --> 00:03:22,450
MAN:
Yeah.
We're number one...!
81
00:03:22,485 --> 00:03:23,451
Sammy! Sammy!
82
00:03:23,486 --> 00:03:27,138
Isn't it about time
for the call?
83
00:03:27,172 --> 00:03:29,274
CLIFF:
Oh-ho!
84
00:03:29,308 --> 00:03:30,474
By golly,
yes, it is.
85
00:03:30,509 --> 00:03:32,010
Time to give
him a call?
86
00:03:32,044 --> 00:03:33,144
( bell ringing )
87
00:03:33,178 --> 00:03:35,079
Hear ye, hear ye.
88
00:03:35,114 --> 00:03:37,214
It's time
for the ceremonial call
89
00:03:37,249 --> 00:03:38,750
to Gary's!
The call!
90
00:03:38,784 --> 00:03:39,684
ALL:
The call!
91
00:03:39,718 --> 00:03:41,169
The call...!
92
00:03:42,204 --> 00:03:43,437
All right.
93
00:03:43,472 --> 00:03:46,274
Yeah!
94
00:03:46,308 --> 00:03:47,708
Hello, Gary.
95
00:03:47,743 --> 00:03:49,710
It's Sam Malone.
96
00:03:49,745 --> 00:03:52,646
Yeah, I was just calling
to say hi, see how you're doing.
97
00:03:52,681 --> 00:03:54,648
No. You know,
for the life of me,
98
00:03:54,683 --> 00:03:57,451
I-I can't think
of what brought you to mind.
99
00:03:57,486 --> 00:03:59,053
No, wait a minute, may...
100
00:03:59,088 --> 00:04:02,390
Maybe it was because
two years ago tonight,
101
00:04:02,424 --> 00:04:05,093
we waxed your heinie
in bowling!
102
00:04:05,127 --> 00:04:06,761
ALL:
Yeah!
103
00:04:06,795 --> 00:04:08,095
( blowing raspberry )
104
00:04:08,129 --> 00:04:09,464
No, no. Oh...
105
00:04:09,498 --> 00:04:11,466
The poor sap is begging
for a rematch.
106
00:04:11,500 --> 00:04:13,067
No.
No, no.
107
00:04:13,101 --> 00:04:14,135
I'm sorry, Gary, no.
108
00:04:14,169 --> 00:04:16,004
No, there'll be no rematch.
109
00:04:16,038 --> 00:04:20,141
The moment of victory
is frozen in time.
110
00:04:20,175 --> 00:04:21,609
That's right. Gar...
111
00:04:21,644 --> 00:04:23,011
Hello? Gary?
112
00:04:23,045 --> 00:04:24,245
( laughs )
113
00:04:24,279 --> 00:04:26,948
The guy is such a poor loser.
114
00:04:26,982 --> 00:04:27,732
Drinks on the house!
115
00:04:27,767 --> 00:04:28,883
( cheering and whistling )
116
00:04:28,917 --> 00:04:30,050
Carla, Carla,
117
00:04:30,085 --> 00:04:32,286
once more around
the bar, huh? Huh?
118
00:04:32,320 --> 00:04:33,554
All right.
119
00:04:33,589 --> 00:04:34,773
MEN:
We're number one!
120
00:04:34,807 --> 00:04:36,041
We're number one...!
121
00:04:36,075 --> 00:04:37,341
Hold it. Hold it!
122
00:04:37,376 --> 00:04:38,943
Where is the trophy?
123
00:04:38,978 --> 00:04:40,344
Who moved it?
What?
124
00:04:41,613 --> 00:04:42,964
Oh, come on.
125
00:04:42,998 --> 00:04:44,866
It's got to be around
here somewhere.
126
00:04:44,900 --> 00:04:46,017
SAM:
Hey, now listen,
127
00:04:46,051 --> 00:04:47,018
this is not funny.
128
00:04:47,052 --> 00:04:48,186
Where is the trophy?
129
00:04:48,220 --> 00:04:49,354
NORM:
Wa-hay-hay
130
00:04:49,388 --> 00:04:51,356
hait a minute.
131
00:04:51,390 --> 00:04:53,657
This smacks of Gary.
132
00:04:53,692 --> 00:04:54,992
Hey, you mean
he had a spy in here?
133
00:04:55,027 --> 00:04:56,027
Yeah, hey, that's right.
134
00:04:56,061 --> 00:04:57,661
Who was that guy
at the end of the bar
135
00:04:57,696 --> 00:04:58,729
drinking imported beer?
136
00:04:58,763 --> 00:05:00,031
Mm-hmm. Very suspicious.
137
00:05:00,065 --> 00:05:01,832
You know none of us
can afford that stuff.
138
00:05:01,867 --> 00:05:03,318
Let's storm
the place!
139
00:05:03,352 --> 00:05:04,752
( loud excited chatter )
140
00:05:04,787 --> 00:05:06,654
Wait, wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait.
141
00:05:06,688 --> 00:05:08,923
Come on, let's not turn this
into mob rule here.
142
00:05:08,957 --> 00:05:11,626
Just a couple of guys go over
and talk to him first. Come on.
143
00:05:11,660 --> 00:05:13,160
All right, Sam,
I think you
better take me
144
00:05:13,195 --> 00:05:14,729
because, uh,
they got to be
intimidated
145
00:05:14,763 --> 00:05:15,997
by the authority
of my uniform.
146
00:05:16,031 --> 00:05:17,231
SAM:
Uh...
147
00:05:17,265 --> 00:05:20,001
Actually, I think
I'll take Woody.
148
00:05:20,035 --> 00:05:21,603
You know, in case
there's some trouble,
149
00:05:21,637 --> 00:05:23,838
I'd like to have someone
young and strong around.
150
00:05:23,872 --> 00:05:24,906
Come on, Woody.
151
00:05:35,233 --> 00:05:36,684
( no audio )
152
00:05:37,686 --> 00:05:39,787
Good luck.
153
00:05:47,396 --> 00:05:48,413
( gasps )
154
00:05:48,447 --> 00:05:49,748
MAN:
Oh!
155
00:05:49,782 --> 00:05:51,583
Our trophy!
156
00:05:51,617 --> 00:05:52,717
CARLA:
Oh,
157
00:05:52,752 --> 00:05:54,501
Sam!
158
00:05:54,536 --> 00:05:55,569
What did you do to Gary?
159
00:05:55,604 --> 00:05:57,171
Did you punch him
right in the face?
160
00:05:57,206 --> 00:05:58,239
Uh, n-not exactly, no.
161
00:05:58,274 --> 00:05:59,407
( clears throat )
162
00:05:59,441 --> 00:06:00,575
He did ask out
a waitress.
163
00:06:00,609 --> 00:06:01,576
Hey.
164
00:06:01,610 --> 00:06:02,977
Sam.
165
00:06:03,011 --> 00:06:04,528
Hey.
166
00:06:04,563 --> 00:06:05,830
What are you all
167
00:06:05,864 --> 00:06:06,881
sitting around here
168
00:06:06,916 --> 00:06:08,683
like a bunch of wimps for?
169
00:06:08,717 --> 00:06:10,885
It's what wimps do.
170
00:06:15,924 --> 00:06:18,526
Let's go over to Gary's
and torch the place! Come on!
171
00:06:18,560 --> 00:06:20,528
Oh, no, no, come
on, whoa, whoa.
172
00:06:20,562 --> 00:06:22,597
There's got to be
a cooler way of
doing this now.
173
00:06:22,631 --> 00:06:24,331
We got to use
a little cunning.
174
00:06:24,366 --> 00:06:26,033
Yeah.
175
00:06:26,067 --> 00:06:27,802
Yeah, I'd like
to do something to Gary
176
00:06:27,836 --> 00:06:29,236
and make him
really miserable.
177
00:06:29,270 --> 00:06:31,372
Why don't you marry him?
178
00:06:33,042 --> 00:06:34,242
Why don't you?
179
00:06:34,276 --> 00:06:36,211
Why don't you?
Why don't you?
180
00:06:36,245 --> 00:06:36,927
You!
You!
181
00:06:36,962 --> 00:06:38,129
You!
You!
182
00:06:38,163 --> 00:06:39,831
That's it!
183
00:06:39,865 --> 00:06:41,149
I do not want
this thing
184
00:06:41,183 --> 00:06:42,516
getting out of hand.
185
00:06:42,551 --> 00:06:44,618
If this bar becomes
a high school locker room,
186
00:06:44,653 --> 00:06:46,421
my patronage,
other than the Bowery Boys,
187
00:06:46,455 --> 00:06:48,423
will disappear.
188
00:06:48,457 --> 00:06:49,657
FRASIER:
No, in this case,
189
00:06:49,691 --> 00:06:51,492
I'm afraid
I must agree with Rebecca.
190
00:06:51,526 --> 00:06:53,311
Thank you, Dr. Crane.
191
00:06:53,345 --> 00:06:54,512
FRASIER:
Well, it's-it's not
192
00:06:54,546 --> 00:06:55,779
for your dollar-grubbing,
193
00:06:55,814 --> 00:06:58,349
you know, front office,
kissy face reasons, but...
194
00:06:59,968 --> 00:07:01,252
...it's because
195
00:07:01,286 --> 00:07:02,820
revenge is never the answer.
196
00:07:02,854 --> 00:07:04,288
You see,
197
00:07:04,323 --> 00:07:06,857
a potentially unending cycle of
198
00:07:06,891 --> 00:07:07,775
juvenile retaliation
199
00:07:07,810 --> 00:07:09,844
can only
lead to a...
200
00:07:09,878 --> 00:07:11,996
well, a kind of
mob mentality,
201
00:07:12,031 --> 00:07:13,731
which will
ultimately result
202
00:07:13,765 --> 00:07:15,433
in a regrettable act.
203
00:07:15,467 --> 00:07:16,968
CLIFF:
Wait a minute, Doc.
204
00:07:17,002 --> 00:07:18,603
When Diane left you
at the altar,
205
00:07:18,637 --> 00:07:20,104
aren't you the guy
who enrolled her
206
00:07:20,138 --> 00:07:21,606
in every tape, book,
and record club
207
00:07:21,640 --> 00:07:22,874
known to mankind?
208
00:07:24,309 --> 00:07:25,977
Yes, but that
was different.
209
00:07:26,011 --> 00:07:27,545
The pompous witch
deserved it.
210
00:07:27,579 --> 00:07:28,980
SAM:
No,
211
00:07:29,014 --> 00:07:30,147
no, no, no, come on.
212
00:07:30,182 --> 00:07:32,016
We got to think
of something
213
00:07:32,050 --> 00:07:33,685
to get our pride back.
214
00:07:33,719 --> 00:07:34,919
Like what Sammy, huh?
Well...
215
00:07:34,953 --> 00:07:36,271
There is one thing
216
00:07:36,305 --> 00:07:38,572
you can beat
Gary's Old Town Tavern at.
217
00:07:38,607 --> 00:07:39,640
Oh, yeah? What's that?
218
00:07:39,674 --> 00:07:41,009
Maturity.
219
00:07:41,043 --> 00:07:43,077
( blowing raspberry,gibbering )
220
00:07:44,679 --> 00:07:46,680
( all makinggoofy, rude noises )
221
00:07:53,955 --> 00:07:55,823
( indistinct conversation )
222
00:08:02,831 --> 00:08:04,098
It's Al.
223
00:08:04,133 --> 00:08:07,168
Hey, Al, why aren't
you at Cheers?
224
00:08:07,202 --> 00:08:09,971
Holy mackerel,
this isn't Cheers?
225
00:08:12,190 --> 00:08:14,541
Uh-oh, Malone's back.
226
00:08:14,576 --> 00:08:15,827
And this time,
227
00:08:15,861 --> 00:08:17,695
he brought some muscle.
228
00:08:17,730 --> 00:08:20,448
PATRONS:
Ooh!
229
00:08:20,482 --> 00:08:22,150
Sammy, I-I can't go
through with this,
230
00:08:22,184 --> 00:08:24,052
not when this guy's
taking shots at me.
231
00:08:24,086 --> 00:08:25,553
No, no, that was a shot at me.
232
00:08:25,587 --> 00:08:26,787
You're right.
233
00:08:26,822 --> 00:08:28,122
Yeah.
Okay.
234
00:08:28,157 --> 00:08:29,857
Gary?
Mm-hmm.
235
00:08:29,891 --> 00:08:31,392
We're here in peace.
236
00:08:31,426 --> 00:08:33,778
Now we want
to let bygones be bygones,
237
00:08:33,812 --> 00:08:35,563
so we brought along
some champagne
238
00:08:35,597 --> 00:08:36,931
to bury the hatchet.
239
00:08:36,966 --> 00:08:38,632
What do you say, huh?
240
00:08:38,667 --> 00:08:39,733
Is that right?
241
00:08:39,767 --> 00:08:41,135
No tricks?
242
00:08:41,169 --> 00:08:42,503
No tricks.
243
00:08:42,537 --> 00:08:44,805
Wow, that's damn decent
of you, Malone.
244
00:08:44,840 --> 00:08:46,107
Milt, some glasses.
245
00:08:46,141 --> 00:08:47,608
I'll be honest with you.
246
00:08:47,642 --> 00:08:49,143
I mean, last
night at Cheers,
247
00:08:49,178 --> 00:08:51,212
all we could talk
about was revenge.
248
00:08:51,246 --> 00:08:53,347
That trophy meant
a great deal to us.
249
00:08:53,382 --> 00:08:54,716
But then, you
know, cooler heads,
250
00:08:54,750 --> 00:08:56,317
light of day and all
that kind of thing,
251
00:08:56,351 --> 00:08:58,652
we just...
well, we realized
252
00:08:58,687 --> 00:08:59,987
that to do
battle with you
253
00:09:00,022 --> 00:09:02,056
would just destroy
both of us.
254
00:09:02,090 --> 00:09:04,491
At least we have
the satisfaction of knowing
255
00:09:04,526 --> 00:09:07,428
that we, uh, we beat you
in one thing.
256
00:09:07,462 --> 00:09:09,096
Maturity.
257
00:09:09,131 --> 00:09:11,965
Oh, actually, I'm afraid
you came up short there, too.
258
00:09:12,000 --> 00:09:14,068
I just sent a dozen roses
over to Cheers
259
00:09:14,102 --> 00:09:15,336
with an apology note.
260
00:09:15,370 --> 00:09:17,571
Oh. Oh, well.
261
00:09:17,605 --> 00:09:19,240
Here's to Cheers.
262
00:09:19,274 --> 00:09:20,390
No, no, no.
263
00:09:20,425 --> 00:09:21,509
To Gary's.
264
00:09:21,543 --> 00:09:24,145
GARY:
Yeah, to Gary's! Yeah!
265
00:09:29,084 --> 00:09:32,653
( Carla laughing )
266
00:09:34,940 --> 00:09:36,791
Whoo! Gary, Gary,
I think maybe
267
00:09:36,825 --> 00:09:39,694
you ought to keep that
back window locked.
268
00:09:39,728 --> 00:09:42,096
You know, people
could sneak in here
and steal some of this
269
00:09:42,130 --> 00:09:43,014
fine crystal.
270
00:09:43,048 --> 00:09:44,398
( Carla laughs )
271
00:09:44,432 --> 00:09:45,666
SAM:
Come, my little
272
00:09:45,700 --> 00:09:47,585
vandal,
our job here is done.
273
00:09:47,619 --> 00:09:49,804
You know what gets me
about this, Malone?
274
00:09:49,838 --> 00:09:51,538
It's how weenie this stunt was.
275
00:09:51,573 --> 00:09:53,490
This is the best
you could come up with?
276
00:09:53,525 --> 00:09:55,259
I am embarrassed,
all right.
277
00:09:55,294 --> 00:09:57,195
Not for me, but for you.
278
00:09:57,229 --> 00:09:58,513
( crowd murmuring )
279
00:09:58,547 --> 00:09:59,813
MAN:
That's pretty small.
280
00:09:59,848 --> 00:10:01,482
Oh, yeah?
281
00:10:01,517 --> 00:10:03,484
I told you we should
have fixed his brakes.
282
00:10:03,519 --> 00:10:05,787
No, no...
283
00:10:05,821 --> 00:10:07,321
You think
I'm humiliated?
284
00:10:07,356 --> 00:10:08,489
I'm not humiliated.
285
00:10:08,523 --> 00:10:10,524
Pretty weenie.
286
00:10:15,663 --> 00:10:17,731
Now I'm humiliated.
287
00:10:23,071 --> 00:10:24,805
Then, after lunch,
I had a patient.
288
00:10:24,839 --> 00:10:26,307
Three separate
personalities,
289
00:10:26,341 --> 00:10:28,376
each one more boring
than the other.
290
00:10:28,410 --> 00:10:30,378
As a matter of fact,
he's the only one
291
00:10:30,412 --> 00:10:33,114
who can tell them apart.
292
00:10:33,148 --> 00:10:35,283
Now, Lilith, darling,
let's remember our caveat.
293
00:10:35,317 --> 00:10:36,250
No more shop talk.
294
00:10:36,284 --> 00:10:37,351
It's the weekend.
295
00:10:37,385 --> 00:10:38,518
It's time to engage
296
00:10:38,553 --> 00:10:40,004
in nice, normal
conversation.
297
00:10:40,038 --> 00:10:41,439
I'll, uh, get us
some drinks. Woody?
298
00:10:41,473 --> 00:10:44,175
Why do you have this obsession
with labeling everything?
299
00:10:44,209 --> 00:10:47,578
Normal, abnormal,
weekday, weekend.
300
00:10:47,612 --> 00:10:49,813
Well, darling, I was only trying
to create a certain...
301
00:10:49,848 --> 00:10:51,882
In other words,
control the conversation.
302
00:10:51,917 --> 00:10:53,684
That's rather compulsive,
isn't it?
303
00:10:53,718 --> 00:10:55,920
Well, how anal of you to notice.
304
00:10:57,956 --> 00:11:00,091
Oh, the whole world's anal
to you.
305
00:11:00,225 --> 00:11:02,643
Well, what say we, uh,
sleep in late tomorrow
306
00:11:02,677 --> 00:11:04,011
and have eggs Benedict?
307
00:11:04,045 --> 00:11:04,811
I love you.
308
00:11:12,587 --> 00:11:13,854
Pest control.
309
00:11:14,756 --> 00:11:16,023
Where should we start?
310
00:11:16,057 --> 00:11:17,875
Excuse me.
What's this about?
311
00:11:17,910 --> 00:11:19,210
Your rat problem.
312
00:11:19,244 --> 00:11:20,544
Rat problem?
313
00:11:20,578 --> 00:11:22,780
Aren't you the one that called
about a rat problem?
314
00:11:22,814 --> 00:11:24,481
No, of course not.
315
00:11:24,516 --> 00:11:26,750
No. We don't have rats.
316
00:11:26,785 --> 00:11:28,452
Well, that's
what we understand, ma'am.
317
00:11:28,486 --> 00:11:30,221
Rats in the building--
big gray ones.
318
00:11:30,255 --> 00:11:31,421
That's why we're here.
319
00:11:31,456 --> 00:11:32,790
Excuse...
Everybody hold on.
320
00:11:32,824 --> 00:11:34,091
There are no rats here.
321
00:11:34,126 --> 00:11:36,294
Oh, of course, Rebecca,
we believe you.
322
00:11:36,328 --> 00:11:38,812
If you should run across
any white ones, about yea big,
323
00:11:38,847 --> 00:11:41,749
I'd be happy to give you
four dollars apiece for them.
324
00:11:43,418 --> 00:11:44,585
What do you use them for?
325
00:11:44,619 --> 00:11:47,154
Snacks.
326
00:11:47,188 --> 00:11:49,623
REBECCA:
Everyone just stay
where you are.
327
00:11:49,658 --> 00:11:51,158
There are no rats.
328
00:11:51,192 --> 00:11:52,660
Free round of drinks
on the house.
329
00:11:52,694 --> 00:11:53,761
I wouldn't do that, ma'am.
330
00:11:53,795 --> 00:11:55,163
Those little buggers
might already
331
00:11:55,197 --> 00:11:56,464
have gotten into your beer.
332
00:11:56,498 --> 00:11:57,581
Whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa.
333
00:11:57,615 --> 00:11:59,716
I'll chance it.
334
00:11:59,751 --> 00:12:02,769
Sam, did you call anyone
about a rat problem?
335
00:12:02,804 --> 00:12:04,238
No, no.
We have a rat problem?
336
00:12:04,272 --> 00:12:05,472
Ew, God.
337
00:12:05,506 --> 00:12:06,707
I didn't call,
you didn't call.
338
00:12:06,741 --> 00:12:08,142
Who called?
339
00:12:08,176 --> 00:12:10,361
Gary.
Gary.
Gary.
340
00:12:10,863 --> 00:12:12,112
How did he know
341
00:12:12,147 --> 00:12:13,948
we have rats?
342
00:12:13,982 --> 00:12:15,950
Uh, look,
if you need us, uh...
343
00:12:15,984 --> 00:12:17,684
here's our card.
344
00:12:17,719 --> 00:12:20,154
( both laughing )
345
00:12:20,188 --> 00:12:22,039
Come again.
346
00:12:23,975 --> 00:12:26,710
"Now that's a stunt.
347
00:12:26,745 --> 00:12:29,413
Love, Gary."
348
00:12:29,448 --> 00:12:31,515
He's mine.
349
00:12:40,442 --> 00:12:42,343
( all laughing )
350
00:12:42,377 --> 00:12:43,677
Mess with us, huh?
351
00:12:43,711 --> 00:12:44,678
Wait till he finds
352
00:12:44,712 --> 00:12:46,997
the prune juice
in his Kahlua.
353
00:12:47,031 --> 00:12:48,699
Yeah, what about
the sneezing powder
354
00:12:48,733 --> 00:12:50,167
in the ventilation system, huh?
355
00:12:50,202 --> 00:12:51,702
That was the coup de ville, huh?
356
00:12:51,736 --> 00:12:53,904
PATRON:
Yeah, Gary's messed around
with the wrong guys.
357
00:12:53,938 --> 00:12:55,138
( all agreeing )
358
00:12:55,173 --> 00:12:57,274
I wish I was there to
see the stupid looks
359
00:12:57,309 --> 00:12:58,609
on their faces,
you know?
360
00:13:05,450 --> 00:13:07,201
Hey, hey, who's
the chrome dome?
361
00:13:09,020 --> 00:13:10,220
I don't know.
362
00:13:10,255 --> 00:13:11,455
I've never seen him before.
363
00:13:11,489 --> 00:13:13,657
Uh-huh.
364
00:13:13,691 --> 00:13:15,026
Afternoon.
365
00:13:15,060 --> 00:13:16,260
I'll have a draft.
366
00:13:16,295 --> 00:13:19,230
Excuse me there,
uh, pal of mine.
367
00:13:19,264 --> 00:13:20,531
Yeah?
368
00:13:20,565 --> 00:13:21,599
Eh, what exactly
369
00:13:21,633 --> 00:13:23,167
are you, uh,
doing in here?
370
00:13:23,201 --> 00:13:25,202
Getting a drink.
371
00:13:25,236 --> 00:13:26,470
Aha.
372
00:13:26,504 --> 00:13:27,170
So, uh, you're not
373
00:13:27,205 --> 00:13:28,639
from the neighborhood, are you?
374
00:13:28,673 --> 00:13:29,990
No, no, I'm from Framingham.
375
00:13:30,025 --> 00:13:31,625
Uh, my wife's at Mass General.
376
00:13:31,660 --> 00:13:33,260
She just had a double bypass,
377
00:13:33,294 --> 00:13:35,829
and I thought I'd
unwind a little with a drink.
378
00:13:35,864 --> 00:13:37,364
That okay?
379
00:13:39,801 --> 00:13:41,551
Sure.
380
00:13:44,055 --> 00:13:45,573
Let's shave his head
and put him on a bus!
381
00:13:45,607 --> 00:13:46,741
( all agreeing )
382
00:13:46,775 --> 00:13:48,092
Excuse me.
383
00:13:48,126 --> 00:13:49,226
On second thought,
384
00:13:49,261 --> 00:13:50,527
I think I'll check to see
385
00:13:50,561 --> 00:13:52,562
if they have a juice machine
in the ICU.
386
00:13:52,597 --> 00:13:53,730
CLIFF:
Yeah.
387
00:13:53,765 --> 00:13:54,932
You do that, pal.
388
00:13:54,966 --> 00:13:58,002
Hey, you tell Dr. Gary
the gang at Cheers says hello.
389
00:13:59,070 --> 00:13:59,937
Huh?
Right, huh?
390
00:14:00,055 --> 00:14:01,622
( chuckling ):
Okay. I don't know.
391
00:14:01,657 --> 00:14:03,791
What, does he think
we're idiots or something?
392
00:14:08,764 --> 00:14:09,931
Did anybody remember
393
00:14:09,965 --> 00:14:11,866
to grease the bar stools
over at Gary's?
394
00:14:11,900 --> 00:14:13,233
Oh yeah.
Yeah, I did.
395
00:14:13,268 --> 00:14:14,735
Woody, get this man
396
00:14:14,770 --> 00:14:15,919
his favorite.
397
00:14:15,953 --> 00:14:17,721
Hello, everyone.
398
00:14:17,756 --> 00:14:20,557
( booing )
Thank you, thank you.
399
00:14:20,592 --> 00:14:21,659
You're too kind.
400
00:14:21,693 --> 00:14:22,993
May I please see the manager?
401
00:14:23,027 --> 00:14:24,011
I'm the manager.
402
00:14:24,045 --> 00:14:24,912
Can I help you?
403
00:14:24,946 --> 00:14:26,513
Oh, so you're the manager.
404
00:14:26,547 --> 00:14:28,415
Finally something in this place
worth looking at.
405
00:14:28,449 --> 00:14:29,549
I'm, uh, Gary
406
00:14:29,584 --> 00:14:31,752
from the Old Town Tavern.
407
00:14:31,786 --> 00:14:32,987
Well, well, well.
408
00:14:33,021 --> 00:14:35,923
I never expected to see you
step foot in this bar.
409
00:14:35,957 --> 00:14:37,791
Now I can call
the exterminator.
410
00:14:37,825 --> 00:14:39,159
Oh, gee, I'm sorry
you feel that way.
411
00:14:39,194 --> 00:14:40,427
Although I can't
say I blame you.
412
00:14:40,461 --> 00:14:41,495
Things did...
413
00:14:41,529 --> 00:14:42,562
kind of get
out of hand,
414
00:14:42,597 --> 00:14:44,064
but hey, we're both
professionals here.
415
00:14:44,099 --> 00:14:46,100
Why don't we just
call this whole thing off
416
00:14:46,134 --> 00:14:47,701
before we lose
any more customers?
417
00:14:47,735 --> 00:14:49,603
Look, uh, I
have to admit,
418
00:14:49,637 --> 00:14:51,372
that when I first heard
that you personally
419
00:14:51,406 --> 00:14:52,706
authorized some
of these pranks,
420
00:14:52,740 --> 00:14:54,075
I was a little
ticked off myself.
421
00:14:54,109 --> 00:14:55,426
But now that
I've met you,
422
00:14:55,460 --> 00:14:57,261
why don't we call that
water under the bridge,
423
00:14:57,295 --> 00:15:00,714
and have a new era of
peaceful coexistence?
424
00:15:00,749 --> 00:15:03,050
Hmm?
425
00:15:03,084 --> 00:15:05,753
All right. Truce.
426
00:15:05,787 --> 00:15:07,020
Whoa, I feel like
427
00:15:07,055 --> 00:15:09,223
a giant weight
has been lifted
428
00:15:09,257 --> 00:15:10,624
from my shoulders.
429
00:15:12,693 --> 00:15:14,494
Do you mind
if I call you sometime
430
00:15:14,528 --> 00:15:16,747
and maybe we go out
for a cup of coffee?
431
00:15:16,782 --> 00:15:17,965
Sure, why not?
432
00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:20,901
I like coffee.
433
00:15:22,254 --> 00:15:25,456
Uh, see ya.
434
00:15:25,490 --> 00:15:26,457
How could
435
00:15:26,491 --> 00:15:27,691
you do that?
436
00:15:27,725 --> 00:15:29,693
How could I do what?
437
00:15:29,727 --> 00:15:32,329
After all that's
happened around here,
438
00:15:32,364 --> 00:15:34,798
you can go on a
date with that rat?
439
00:15:34,832 --> 00:15:37,468
Would you please
not say that word?
440
00:15:41,573 --> 00:15:44,641
I happen to think Gary
made a lot of sense.
441
00:15:44,676 --> 00:15:46,444
Besides, he's kind of cute.
442
00:15:46,478 --> 00:15:49,413
Cute?!
You think Gary's cute?
443
00:15:49,448 --> 00:15:51,648
Yeah, he's got
a real cool face
and a nice body.
444
00:15:51,683 --> 00:15:53,084
He looks kind of
like an athlete.
445
00:15:53,118 --> 00:15:54,318
Hey, what am I?
446
00:15:54,352 --> 00:15:56,320
Jealous.
447
00:15:59,107 --> 00:16:00,174
Excuse me.
448
00:16:00,208 --> 00:16:01,375
( bleating )
449
00:16:01,409 --> 00:16:03,643
( screams )
450
00:16:03,678 --> 00:16:06,080
There are sheep in my office!
451
00:16:06,114 --> 00:16:08,082
Whoa, sheep.
Ho-ho!
452
00:16:08,116 --> 00:16:11,618
You got to admire that, huh?
453
00:16:11,652 --> 00:16:13,887
I thought it
smelled like home.
454
00:16:16,157 --> 00:16:16,907
I'm gonna get him.
455
00:16:17,025 --> 00:16:18,425
I'm going to rip his head off.
456
00:16:18,459 --> 00:16:20,661
Aw, but he's so cute.
457
00:16:20,695 --> 00:16:21,929
And then I'm going
to tie him up,
458
00:16:21,963 --> 00:16:23,263
and I'm going
to take a lighter,
459
00:16:23,298 --> 00:16:25,465
and I'm going to torch him
from the tip of his toes
460
00:16:25,500 --> 00:16:26,600
to the top of his head.
461
00:16:26,634 --> 00:16:27,768
How come you never
462
00:16:27,803 --> 00:16:29,203
do stuff like
that to me?
463
00:16:29,237 --> 00:16:30,470
( scoffs )
464
00:16:30,505 --> 00:16:32,139
Don't worry about it.
Don't worry about it.
465
00:16:32,174 --> 00:16:33,273
It's all taken care of here.
466
00:16:33,308 --> 00:16:34,274
( whistles )
467
00:16:35,310 --> 00:16:37,511
SAM:
You all set?
468
00:16:37,545 --> 00:16:39,046
Yep.
469
00:16:40,431 --> 00:16:42,198
Tool box, check.
470
00:16:42,233 --> 00:16:44,401
Coaxial cable, check.
471
00:16:44,436 --> 00:16:47,070
VCR, check.
472
00:16:47,104 --> 00:16:48,238
Tape.
473
00:16:48,272 --> 00:16:49,473
Check.
474
00:16:49,507 --> 00:16:51,274
Good luck, babe.
475
00:16:51,309 --> 00:16:52,543
Carla?
476
00:16:52,577 --> 00:16:54,144
Carla?
477
00:16:54,178 --> 00:16:55,746
Carla?
478
00:16:55,780 --> 00:16:58,214
You're not going
to do anything
illegal, are you?
479
00:16:58,249 --> 00:17:01,067
What makes you say that?
480
00:17:10,078 --> 00:17:12,396
Ladies and gentlemen!
Ladies and gentlemen!
481
00:17:12,430 --> 00:17:15,416
Gary's Old Town Tavern
is once again proud to present
482
00:17:15,450 --> 00:17:17,384
the finest
in world-class boxing
483
00:17:17,419 --> 00:17:20,053
on the largest screen TV
available in any bar
484
00:17:20,087 --> 00:17:22,556
in the greater
Metropolitan Boston area!
485
00:17:22,590 --> 00:17:24,758
( cheering, whistling )
486
00:17:26,678 --> 00:17:27,695
Grab a drink,
487
00:17:27,813 --> 00:17:29,180
sit back, relax,
488
00:17:29,214 --> 00:17:31,081
and let the bloodletting begin!
489
00:17:31,116 --> 00:17:32,266
( patron whoops )
490
00:17:32,300 --> 00:17:33,400
TV ANNOUNCER:
All right.
491
00:17:33,435 --> 00:17:34,835
The months of waiting are over.
492
00:17:34,869 --> 00:17:36,103
We've heard all the hype,
493
00:17:36,137 --> 00:17:38,239
we know how many millions
are on the line.
494
00:17:38,273 --> 00:17:39,406
This is the big one.
495
00:17:39,441 --> 00:17:40,708
Here we go!
496
00:17:40,742 --> 00:17:41,842
( loud static burst )
497
00:17:41,876 --> 00:17:44,044
Good evening,
I'm Norm Peterson.
498
00:17:44,078 --> 00:17:46,380
And I'm Clifford C. Clavin.
499
00:17:47,448 --> 00:17:49,616
Welcome to an
evening of poetry.
500
00:17:49,651 --> 00:17:50,383
We're so glad that
501
00:17:50,418 --> 00:17:51,868
you've chosen to ignore
502
00:17:51,903 --> 00:17:52,853
the fisticuffs
they're watching
503
00:17:52,887 --> 00:17:54,204
over at Cheers right now,
504
00:17:54,239 --> 00:17:56,806
uh, three blocks down
and on your right,
505
00:17:56,841 --> 00:17:58,842
drinks half price if you
mention, "Gary sent me."
506
00:17:58,876 --> 00:18:00,510
Tapped into the cable.
507
00:18:00,544 --> 00:18:02,546
Instead, relax
with us and enjoy
508
00:18:02,580 --> 00:18:03,847
as we read and interpret
509
00:18:03,881 --> 00:18:06,850
the many works of
Dante Gabriel Rosetti,
510
00:18:06,884 --> 00:18:09,719
the famous 19th century
poet and fancy guy.
511
00:18:09,754 --> 00:18:10,704
Clifford?
512
00:18:10,738 --> 00:18:12,022
Norman...
513
00:18:12,056 --> 00:18:14,358
I'd like to start with
"The Ballad of the Dead Ladies."
514
00:18:14,392 --> 00:18:15,359
Ah.
515
00:18:15,393 --> 00:18:16,860
An excellent choice.
516
00:18:16,895 --> 00:18:18,929
It's written
in iambic pentathlon
517
00:18:18,963 --> 00:18:20,697
with, uh, rhyming couplets,
518
00:18:20,731 --> 00:18:22,499
every couple of couplets.
519
00:18:22,533 --> 00:18:25,502
"Tell me now,
in what hidden way
520
00:18:25,537 --> 00:18:28,338
"is Lady Flora
the lovely Roman?"
521
00:18:32,861 --> 00:18:34,844
NORM:
Oh, oh, oh.
522
00:18:34,879 --> 00:18:36,180
Hey, uh, Gary.
523
00:18:36,214 --> 00:18:37,348
( patrons laughing )
524
00:18:37,382 --> 00:18:38,682
NORM:
What's up, buddy?
525
00:18:38,716 --> 00:18:39,717
I want to know,
did you enjoy
526
00:18:39,835 --> 00:18:41,035
the, uh, fight
the other night?
527
00:18:41,069 --> 00:18:41,969
CLIFF:
Yeah.
528
00:18:42,003 --> 00:18:44,204
Who'd you bet on--
Shelley or Keats?
529
00:18:45,239 --> 00:18:46,340
You guys are great.
530
00:18:46,374 --> 00:18:48,575
I tell you,
I didn't know you had it ya.
531
00:18:48,609 --> 00:18:49,676
You know what?
532
00:18:49,710 --> 00:18:51,911
This is going to go down
in the annals of gags
533
00:18:51,946 --> 00:18:53,080
as one of the greatest.
534
00:18:53,114 --> 00:18:54,348
Here, give me
your hands, guys.
535
00:18:54,382 --> 00:18:55,915
I got something better
for you, though,
536
00:18:55,950 --> 00:18:58,218
than a trophy now.
537
00:18:58,252 --> 00:18:59,569
Come on, Gare.
No, no, no.
538
00:18:59,604 --> 00:19:00,670
On the level.
539
00:19:00,705 --> 00:19:02,539
No crossed fingers,
standing on both feet.
540
00:19:02,573 --> 00:19:06,043
I am a personal
friend of Wade Boggs.
541
00:19:06,077 --> 00:19:07,811
The Wade Boggs,
who was gonna come
over to my place,
542
00:19:07,845 --> 00:19:08,879
sign some
autographs,
543
00:19:08,913 --> 00:19:09,947
but I rerouted
him over here.
544
00:19:09,981 --> 00:19:11,548
He should be
here any minute.
545
00:19:11,583 --> 00:19:13,349
You take good
care of him, okay?
546
00:19:13,384 --> 00:19:14,801
You guys are the greatest.
547
00:19:14,835 --> 00:19:16,603
I didn't know you had it in you.
548
00:19:16,637 --> 00:19:19,339
( laughs )
Take care.
549
00:19:19,374 --> 00:19:20,674
Did you guys
hear that?
550
00:19:20,709 --> 00:19:22,376
Wade Boggs is
coming here.
551
00:19:22,410 --> 00:19:23,944
All right.
All right.
552
00:19:23,978 --> 00:19:25,095
Who's Wade Boggs?
553
00:19:25,129 --> 00:19:26,263
"Who's Wade Boggs?"!
554
00:19:26,297 --> 00:19:28,832
He's only the
greatest third baseman
555
00:19:28,866 --> 00:19:30,016
in Red Sox history.
556
00:19:30,051 --> 00:19:31,051
Guy's a pure hitter.
557
00:19:31,085 --> 00:19:33,253
He's only popped up six
times in five years.
558
00:19:33,287 --> 00:19:34,922
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
559
00:19:34,956 --> 00:19:37,191
I'm standing in a room
full of idiots.
560
00:19:37,225 --> 00:19:39,526
That's true.
What's your point?
561
00:19:40,862 --> 00:19:42,980
Gary's not gonna send
the real Wade Boggs
562
00:19:43,014 --> 00:19:44,114
over to see us.
563
00:19:44,148 --> 00:19:46,649
He's gonna get some guy
in a Wade Boggs suit,
564
00:19:46,684 --> 00:19:48,285
claiming to be Wade Boggs.
565
00:19:48,319 --> 00:19:50,554
We're all gonna slobber
all over him,
566
00:19:50,588 --> 00:19:53,056
buy him drinks,
beg him for autographs
567
00:19:53,090 --> 00:19:56,460
and Gary'll come in
and bust a gut laughing at us.
568
00:19:56,494 --> 00:19:58,095
( murmuring assent )
569
00:20:01,449 --> 00:20:03,166
Excuse me.
570
00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:05,002
Can I help you?
571
00:20:05,036 --> 00:20:06,402
Yeah, uh, Gary sent me over
572
00:20:06,437 --> 00:20:07,671
to sign some autographs.
573
00:20:07,705 --> 00:20:08,772
Hi, I'm Wade Boggs.
574
00:20:08,806 --> 00:20:09,840
Hi.
575
00:20:09,874 --> 00:20:11,441
Wade Boggs, huh?
576
00:20:11,475 --> 00:20:12,375
( Norm chuckles )
577
00:20:12,409 --> 00:20:14,160
Yeah, how you doing?
I'm Babe Ruth.
578
00:20:15,697 --> 00:20:18,632
Yeah, I'm his, uh,
good friend Dizzy Dean.
579
00:20:20,134 --> 00:20:22,168
And I'm Woody Boyd.
580
00:20:25,056 --> 00:20:26,856
Are you sure
that isn't Wade Boggs?
581
00:20:26,891 --> 00:20:28,625
I mean,
it really looks like him.
582
00:20:28,660 --> 00:20:29,759
Oh, Carla, come on.
583
00:20:29,794 --> 00:20:31,061
That's not Wade Boggs.
584
00:20:31,095 --> 00:20:33,863
Wade Boggs is a big,
strapping lad like myself.
585
00:20:35,032 --> 00:20:38,669
Uh, Mr., uh, Wade Boggs,
586
00:20:38,703 --> 00:20:40,170
what, uh...
587
00:20:40,205 --> 00:20:42,038
what are we batting these days?
588
00:20:42,073 --> 00:20:43,540
Something like .360, huh?
589
00:20:43,575 --> 00:20:45,442
.361.
NORM:
Oh.
590
00:20:45,476 --> 00:20:47,744
Well, welcome to Cheers,
Mr.--
591
00:20:47,778 --> 00:20:50,647
( gruff voice ):
Wade Boggs.
592
00:20:52,217 --> 00:20:55,018
I thought you folks
were, uh, Red Sox fans.
593
00:20:55,052 --> 00:20:57,487
Oh, yeah, we're,
we're Red Sox fans.
594
00:20:57,522 --> 00:21:00,357
( chuckling ):
Sure, Mr. Wade Boggs.
595
00:21:00,391 --> 00:21:02,125
As a matter
of fact, uh,
596
00:21:02,160 --> 00:21:04,594
we'd, uh, like to give you
a nice welcome
597
00:21:04,628 --> 00:21:06,696
that we give
all great sports stars
598
00:21:06,730 --> 00:21:08,565
that happen by to Cheers here.
599
00:21:08,599 --> 00:21:09,632
( Cliff laughs )
600
00:21:09,667 --> 00:21:11,401
Maybe I ought to
get out of here.
601
00:21:11,436 --> 00:21:12,235
Hurry, guys!
Let's get him!
602
00:21:12,270 --> 00:21:15,305
( all shouting )
603
00:21:23,698 --> 00:21:25,932
( shouting )
604
00:21:25,966 --> 00:21:27,467
( Carla laughing )
605
00:21:27,502 --> 00:21:30,170
Whoo-hoo!
606
00:21:30,204 --> 00:21:32,972
Man, that guy was
a lot quicker than he looked.
607
00:21:33,007 --> 00:21:34,073
Yeah. Let's, uh,
608
00:21:34,108 --> 00:21:35,942
check out this
guy's wallet.
609
00:21:35,976 --> 00:21:38,478
Find out who this
joker really was.
610
00:21:38,513 --> 00:21:39,580
Yeah, this, uh,
611
00:21:39,614 --> 00:21:42,349
this guy's name
was... Wade Boggs.
612
00:21:42,383 --> 00:21:46,219
Wait.
Wow, what a
coincidence.
613
00:21:46,253 --> 00:21:48,171
Well, I guess Gary went
to a lot of trouble
614
00:21:48,206 --> 00:21:49,873
to make up fake I.D.'s
for this guy and...
615
00:21:49,907 --> 00:21:52,042
credit cards and...
616
00:21:52,076 --> 00:21:55,045
photo of him with
Jim Rice and Dwight Evans.
617
00:21:56,680 --> 00:21:57,748
( groans )
618
00:21:57,782 --> 00:21:59,216
Oh, I'm sorry I'm late, guys.
619
00:21:59,250 --> 00:22:00,450
I had a rough night.
620
00:22:00,484 --> 00:22:02,352
I was out showing
Gary's steady chick
621
00:22:02,386 --> 00:22:03,519
the time of her life.
622
00:22:03,554 --> 00:22:04,554
( laughing )
623
00:22:04,588 --> 00:22:06,373
Whoo.
624
00:22:06,407 --> 00:22:08,291
Did I miss anything?
625
00:22:08,326 --> 00:22:09,993
No, no, just an average day.
626
00:22:10,027 --> 00:22:11,862
We refilled the pretzel bowls,
627
00:22:11,896 --> 00:22:14,665
played a little darts,
pantsed Wade Boggs,
628
00:22:14,699 --> 00:22:16,750
watched a little TV.
Wait, you did what?
629
00:22:16,784 --> 00:22:19,936
Oh, man, we thought it was
another one of Gary's tricks.
630
00:22:19,970 --> 00:22:22,072
So that's who was
running out there
631
00:22:22,106 --> 00:22:24,074
in his underwear in traffic.
632
00:22:24,108 --> 00:22:25,742
You know, you see...
633
00:22:25,776 --> 00:22:27,511
Gary has pulled off
the greatest,
634
00:22:27,545 --> 00:22:29,279
most ingenious
trick of them all.
635
00:22:29,314 --> 00:22:31,215
He's gotten us to get ourselves.
636
00:22:31,249 --> 00:22:32,432
CLIFF:
Frasier's right.
637
00:22:32,466 --> 00:22:34,067
We can't top this.
638
00:22:34,102 --> 00:22:35,668
Gary's beaten us.
639
00:22:35,703 --> 00:22:38,004
You know, it's really
rather Machiavellian.
640
00:22:38,038 --> 00:22:39,456
Hey.
641
00:22:39,490 --> 00:22:42,342
Come on, guys.
642
00:22:42,376 --> 00:22:44,861
So we've been humiliated
in every sport.
643
00:22:44,895 --> 00:22:46,179
We've still got something
644
00:22:46,213 --> 00:22:47,748
that Gary can't take away.
645
00:22:48,532 --> 00:22:49,983
Our pride?
646
00:22:50,017 --> 00:22:52,652
Hell, no.
We never had that.
647
00:22:52,687 --> 00:22:54,771
We have got
648
00:22:54,805 --> 00:22:57,540
the great
Wade Boggs' pants!
649
00:22:59,260 --> 00:23:01,828
Well, it's either
this or nothing.
650
00:23:05,850 --> 00:23:07,517
We're number one!
651
00:23:07,552 --> 00:23:09,486
ALL:
We're number one!
652
00:23:09,520 --> 00:23:11,488
We're number one!
653
00:23:11,522 --> 00:23:12,789
We're number one!
654
00:23:12,824 --> 00:23:14,357
We're number one!
655
00:23:14,392 --> 00:23:15,692
Hey!
We're number one!
656
00:23:15,727 --> 00:23:18,228
Pretty weenie.
59069
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