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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,669 --> 00:00:05,130 It's gonna be sunny and 75 this week. 2 00:00:05,213 --> 00:00:08,049 - [Amanda continues indistinctly] - Jim, hurry, Amanda's doing the weather. 3 00:00:08,133 --> 00:00:09,509 She does that every weekend. 4 00:00:09,592 --> 00:00:12,929 The Cowboys play every weekend. You manage to watch them. 5 00:00:13,013 --> 00:00:16,182 Well, when Mandy has a chance at the Super Bowl, I'll tune in. 6 00:00:16,766 --> 00:00:20,770 Hey, I'm tryin' to listen to my wife. Sometimes she quizzes me. 7 00:00:21,855 --> 00:00:24,107 Thanks, y'all, for watchin' and writin'. 8 00:00:24,190 --> 00:00:27,277 Keep those letters comin', except for you, Bruce from Texarkana. 9 00:00:27,360 --> 00:00:29,487 You will never see my feet, Bruce. Stop asking. 10 00:00:30,363 --> 00:00:31,489 So, Merry Christmas 11 00:00:31,573 --> 00:00:33,491 and from the bottom of my heart, 12 00:00:33,575 --> 00:00:35,493 I am happy to fill in around here 13 00:00:35,577 --> 00:00:38,747 if anyone gets sick or, God forbid, has a death in the family. 14 00:00:39,456 --> 00:00:40,457 Smooth. 15 00:00:40,957 --> 00:00:44,711 Speaking of Christmas, have you talked to your mother? 16 00:00:45,879 --> 00:00:48,673 I'm just trying to figure out our plans and how to make things perfect, 17 00:00:48,757 --> 00:00:50,425 but whatever you want's fine by me. 18 00:00:50,800 --> 00:00:52,677 And the smooth keeps coming. 19 00:00:53,386 --> 00:00:56,222 Of course, your mom got CeeCee on Christmas last year, 20 00:00:56,306 --> 00:01:00,435 so seems like it's our turn, but I don't wanna be difficult. 21 00:01:00,518 --> 00:01:01,770 That's her job. 22 00:01:03,063 --> 00:01:04,147 I'll talk to her. 23 00:01:04,230 --> 00:01:05,607 No rush. 24 00:01:05,690 --> 00:01:08,234 I just need to let Santa know 25 00:01:08,318 --> 00:01:10,820 if he should be making an appearance here. 26 00:01:10,904 --> 00:01:14,282 Well, the Cowboys are playing on Christmas, so Santa's busy. 27 00:01:14,407 --> 00:01:16,826 If CeeCee's gonna be here, Santa's gonna be here. 28 00:01:18,119 --> 00:01:21,706 It's OK, I'm sure Santa can be in a lot of places at once. 29 00:01:21,790 --> 00:01:25,126 But my granddaughter can't, so pick. 30 00:01:26,044 --> 00:01:27,545 [theme music playing] 31 00:01:52,403 --> 00:01:53,404 [switch clicks] 32 00:01:58,993 --> 00:02:01,246 - Hey, I was thinkin'. - Oh, boy. 33 00:02:01,329 --> 00:02:04,916 Hear me out. I know Mr. McAllister always closed the week of Christmas, 34 00:02:04,999 --> 00:02:06,709 but what if we stayed open? 35 00:02:07,669 --> 00:02:09,754 You want us to work on Christmas? 36 00:02:09,838 --> 00:02:13,466 It's not crazy. Think of all the Jewish people who might need tires. 37 00:02:14,217 --> 00:02:17,220 How many Jewish people do you think are in Medford, Texas? 38 00:02:17,846 --> 00:02:20,223 I know there'd be a lot more if they could buy tires during Christmas. 39 00:02:20,849 --> 00:02:23,393 No, not a chance. I need some time off. 40 00:02:23,476 --> 00:02:24,936 Hear ya loud and clear. 41 00:02:26,896 --> 00:02:30,483 Although, Fagenbacher's gonna be closed, so we'd be the only game in town. 42 00:02:30,567 --> 00:02:33,194 [sighs] Are you gonna keep badgering me until I say yes? 43 00:02:33,278 --> 00:02:36,030 - Of course not. I'll drop it. - Thanks. 44 00:02:37,323 --> 00:02:38,867 It's just we're in so much debt. 45 00:02:39,784 --> 00:02:40,952 Come on, dude. 46 00:02:41,161 --> 00:02:42,745 I'm thinkin' about you. 47 00:02:42,829 --> 00:02:45,582 And all those Jewish people with flat tires. 48 00:02:52,922 --> 00:02:54,716 You missed a good sermon this morning. 49 00:02:54,799 --> 00:02:58,344 Pastor Jeff is always on fire during the holidays. 50 00:02:58,428 --> 00:03:02,140 Remember that candlelight service when his sleeve actually caught on fire? 51 00:03:03,266 --> 00:03:05,643 I know he almost died, but that was funny. 52 00:03:07,353 --> 00:03:08,354 I need some money. 53 00:03:08,438 --> 00:03:10,148 Aren't you gonna say hi to your brother? 54 00:03:10,231 --> 00:03:12,192 Hi. Forty bucks should do it. 55 00:03:12,942 --> 00:03:14,986 I am not giving you $40. 56 00:03:15,069 --> 00:03:16,613 But I have to buy a new bathing suit. 57 00:03:16,696 --> 00:03:18,281 You have a perfectly good one. 58 00:03:18,364 --> 00:03:19,449 That's a one-piece. 59 00:03:19,657 --> 00:03:21,409 What's wrong with a one-piece? 60 00:03:21,492 --> 00:03:23,453 Everyone in California wears bikinis. 61 00:03:23,536 --> 00:03:25,747 Well, everyone in California's going to hell, 62 00:03:25,830 --> 00:03:28,041 that's why God gave them earthquakes. 63 00:03:29,959 --> 00:03:31,794 - Well, what's all this about California? - [sighs] 64 00:03:32,670 --> 00:03:35,757 I told Sheldon that we would visit him for Christmas. 65 00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:36,841 Oh. 66 00:03:37,300 --> 00:03:40,929 And I was hoping that you and Mandy and CeeCee might join us. 67 00:03:41,679 --> 00:03:44,557 That's real nice, but I don't think we can. 68 00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:47,310 You don't have to be around Sheldon the whole time. 69 00:03:48,144 --> 00:03:51,856 That ain't why. I mean, it ain't ain't why. 70 00:03:51,940 --> 00:03:56,236 Well, I bet CeeCee would love to go on one of those buses 71 00:03:56,319 --> 00:03:57,695 and see where the stars live. 72 00:03:57,779 --> 00:03:59,155 She's two years old. 73 00:03:59,697 --> 00:04:02,033 Well, maybe Barney's on that tour. 74 00:04:02,951 --> 00:04:05,495 Look, I just can't take the time off work. 75 00:04:06,079 --> 00:04:07,080 I understand. 76 00:04:07,622 --> 00:04:09,582 I knew it was a long shot. 77 00:04:10,583 --> 00:04:11,834 You'll still have a good time. 78 00:04:11,918 --> 00:04:13,670 You'll get to meet all of Sheldon's friends. 79 00:04:13,753 --> 00:04:16,506 That's so sweet. You think Sheldon has friends. 80 00:04:22,929 --> 00:04:24,597 - Jim? - [Jim] In here. 81 00:04:25,014 --> 00:04:26,349 What are you doing? 82 00:04:26,432 --> 00:04:28,601 Taking a bubble bath. What do you think I'm doin'? 83 00:04:29,644 --> 00:04:31,813 Well, hurry up, I've got something to tell you. 84 00:04:32,188 --> 00:04:33,731 [stutters] All right, hold on. 85 00:04:34,399 --> 00:04:35,650 [toilet flushes] 86 00:04:37,735 --> 00:04:38,820 [flushing stops] 87 00:04:42,740 --> 00:04:43,783 [door opens] 88 00:04:44,492 --> 00:04:45,660 What? 89 00:04:46,160 --> 00:04:49,205 Mary's going to visit Sheldon. We've got CeeCee all to ourselves. 90 00:04:49,914 --> 00:04:51,833 You interrupted my business for that? 91 00:04:52,458 --> 00:04:54,627 - Sorry, I was just excited. - Oh... 92 00:04:54,711 --> 00:04:56,754 You're right, honey, it is exciting. 93 00:04:56,838 --> 00:04:58,506 Now if you'll excuse me. 94 00:04:59,340 --> 00:05:01,592 Why don't we ever go away for the holidays? 95 00:05:02,302 --> 00:05:04,178 It's one of life's little mysteries. 96 00:05:05,638 --> 00:05:06,723 We're retired. 97 00:05:07,265 --> 00:05:09,142 We've got more money than Mary. 98 00:05:09,642 --> 00:05:13,896 Why does she get to go away on vacation when we're stuck sitting at home? 99 00:05:14,689 --> 00:05:16,316 You were just so happy. 100 00:05:16,983 --> 00:05:19,902 And you were just on the toilet. Things change. 101 00:05:20,570 --> 00:05:22,822 Why don't we take the whole family to the beach? 102 00:05:22,905 --> 00:05:24,198 Stay at a fancy hotel. 103 00:05:24,282 --> 00:05:26,701 It could be our Christmas gift to everyone. 104 00:05:26,784 --> 00:05:28,745 All right. Let me think about it. 105 00:05:30,955 --> 00:05:32,582 There's Fort Lauderdale. 106 00:05:33,708 --> 00:05:34,751 Or we can do Miami. 107 00:05:34,834 --> 00:05:36,169 I'm thinkin'. Go away! 108 00:05:41,382 --> 00:05:44,010 So, we really wanna be careful about not going overboard with gifts 109 00:05:44,093 --> 00:05:46,554 - for CeeCee this year. - We don't want her gettin' spoiled. 110 00:05:46,637 --> 00:05:48,431 - Like Mandy? - Hey! 111 00:05:49,015 --> 00:05:50,391 But yeah. 112 00:05:51,434 --> 00:05:53,061 Well, actually, 113 00:05:53,770 --> 00:05:56,647 we wanted to talk to y'all about your gifts. 114 00:05:56,731 --> 00:05:58,941 Aww, you don't have to get us anything. 115 00:05:59,025 --> 00:06:00,360 That doesn't apply to you. 116 00:06:01,486 --> 00:06:03,446 You said we didn't need to do gifts this year. 117 00:06:03,529 --> 00:06:06,574 Yeah, I say it, but you love me so much, you do it anyway. That's how this works. 118 00:06:07,492 --> 00:06:09,035 - Tell them, Jim. - [sighs] 119 00:06:09,702 --> 00:06:12,663 Your mother and I are taking y'all to Miami for Christmas. 120 00:06:12,747 --> 00:06:14,707 To a resort right on the beach! 121 00:06:16,793 --> 00:06:18,628 - That's so nice. - Wow! 122 00:06:18,711 --> 00:06:20,588 But we always have Christmas here. 123 00:06:20,671 --> 00:06:21,506 Jim? 124 00:06:22,882 --> 00:06:25,009 I've been informed that this'll be better. 125 00:06:25,718 --> 00:06:27,845 Don't you wanna try something different? 126 00:06:27,929 --> 00:06:29,055 Different? 127 00:06:29,472 --> 00:06:31,349 It's like you don't even know me. 128 00:06:32,100 --> 00:06:33,893 You two wanna go, right? 129 00:06:34,352 --> 00:06:36,854 Actually, I was gonna keep the store open for the holidays. 130 00:06:36,938 --> 00:06:39,148 Yeah, and I need to be available to fill in at the station. 131 00:06:39,732 --> 00:06:41,234 What is wrong with you people? 132 00:06:41,317 --> 00:06:43,861 We're trying to take you on a free vacation. 133 00:06:43,945 --> 00:06:46,572 [chuckles sarcastically] Free for them, not for me. 134 00:06:47,782 --> 00:06:50,410 Seems like you're the only one that really wants to go, Mom. 135 00:06:50,493 --> 00:06:53,413 [scoffs] That is not true. Jim. 136 00:06:53,496 --> 00:06:54,831 Oh, come on! 137 00:07:00,878 --> 00:07:03,798 [clicks tongue] Are we being selfish? 138 00:07:04,257 --> 00:07:05,675 'Cause we'd rather make money 139 00:07:05,758 --> 00:07:08,302 than sit on a beach and drink booze out of a coconut. 140 00:07:08,386 --> 00:07:09,887 I don't think so. 141 00:07:11,013 --> 00:07:13,808 Well, I gotta tell you, I'm having second thoughts. 142 00:07:13,891 --> 00:07:15,101 Seriously? 143 00:07:15,852 --> 00:07:17,812 Yeah, I mean, the station's probably not gonna call me in. 144 00:07:17,895 --> 00:07:19,188 We should go. 145 00:07:19,272 --> 00:07:23,484 Besides, I think I'd like to see my husband on a beach in a bathing suit 146 00:07:23,568 --> 00:07:25,403 and, I'm praying to God, not cowboy boots. 147 00:07:27,780 --> 00:07:30,074 I wouldn't wear my boots on the beach. [scoffs] 148 00:07:30,158 --> 00:07:31,451 Maybe by the pool. 149 00:07:32,994 --> 00:07:35,872 Well, just think about how cute CeeCee would be playing in the sand. 150 00:07:35,955 --> 00:07:37,707 How's that different than playin' in a sandbox? 151 00:07:37,790 --> 00:07:39,876 'Cause I'll be next to her getting a tan. 152 00:07:41,169 --> 00:07:43,754 Come on. You work all week. I work on the weekends. 153 00:07:43,838 --> 00:07:46,257 We never really get any real family time. 154 00:07:48,968 --> 00:07:51,804 - You know what? Let's do it. - [gasps] Yay. 155 00:07:53,764 --> 00:07:56,058 Ooh, I'm gonna have to get a bikini wax. 156 00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:57,435 Maybe I should get one. 157 00:07:58,728 --> 00:07:59,896 Oh, sweetheart, 158 00:07:59,979 --> 00:08:01,481 you'd cry like a baby. 159 00:08:06,611 --> 00:08:08,905 Come on, Ruben, don't be mad. 160 00:08:08,988 --> 00:08:11,949 I canceled my plans 'cause you convinced me it was a good idea 161 00:08:12,033 --> 00:08:13,117 to keep the store open. 162 00:08:13,201 --> 00:08:14,744 It is a good idea! 163 00:08:15,203 --> 00:08:16,746 I just won't be here for it. 164 00:08:17,872 --> 00:08:20,166 So, I'm supposed to work while you go on vacation? 165 00:08:20,249 --> 00:08:22,585 How about this? How about I just make it up to you 166 00:08:22,668 --> 00:08:23,961 and I'll work on the next holiday. 167 00:08:24,837 --> 00:08:26,339 So what, like Valentine's Day? 168 00:08:26,422 --> 00:08:28,132 No, Valentine's Day ain't gonna work. 169 00:08:29,759 --> 00:08:32,720 Maybe I'll just close the store. Join my family in Mexico. 170 00:08:32,845 --> 00:08:34,222 I thought you're Puerto Rican. 171 00:08:34,597 --> 00:08:37,642 I am. They're vacationing in Mexico. 172 00:08:38,351 --> 00:08:40,061 You can see why that was confusing. 173 00:08:43,773 --> 00:08:46,526 So, I know I said I was gonna be available to fill in, 174 00:08:46,609 --> 00:08:48,945 but my plans changed and I'm gonna be... 175 00:08:50,112 --> 00:08:51,364 Oh, she is. 176 00:08:52,490 --> 00:08:54,200 Oh, no. 177 00:08:55,910 --> 00:08:57,995 Well, how long would you need me? 178 00:08:58,746 --> 00:09:00,206 Oh, boy. You know, I just... 179 00:09:00,289 --> 00:09:03,417 I made so many promises to so many... Let me call you back. 180 00:09:06,921 --> 00:09:09,298 [indistinct TV chatter] 181 00:09:09,382 --> 00:09:10,508 Hey, Daddy. 182 00:09:11,592 --> 00:09:12,718 What's up? 183 00:09:12,802 --> 00:09:17,223 Well, I was just... I was thinking about the trip and how excited I am. 184 00:09:18,057 --> 00:09:19,267 Uh-huh. 185 00:09:20,643 --> 00:09:23,396 You know, speaking of exciting things, the station called 186 00:09:23,479 --> 00:09:25,982 and the weeknight weathergirl got lice from her kid. 187 00:09:26,399 --> 00:09:27,608 Yuck. 188 00:09:27,692 --> 00:09:30,027 Yeah. It's a bad case, they may have to shave her head. 189 00:09:30,987 --> 00:09:32,780 Are you tryin' to say you're not comin' to Miami? 190 00:09:32,863 --> 00:09:34,657 No, no, no, of course not. 191 00:09:34,740 --> 00:09:38,452 I was just wondering if maybe we could leave two days later. 192 00:09:38,536 --> 00:09:40,162 Well, everything's already booked. 193 00:09:40,246 --> 00:09:44,375 Yeah, I know, and I wouldn't ask, but this is really important to my career. 194 00:09:45,459 --> 00:09:47,295 This could be your gift to me. 195 00:09:48,546 --> 00:09:51,340 The trip is my gift to you. 196 00:09:52,091 --> 00:09:53,759 No, no, your trip 197 00:09:53,843 --> 00:09:55,344 is the gift for everybody. 198 00:09:55,428 --> 00:09:58,723 This could be your special gift to me. 199 00:10:00,433 --> 00:10:03,811 Do you understand how expensive it'll be to rebook everything on Christmas? 200 00:10:03,894 --> 00:10:06,731 Yes, I know. That's why it would be so special. 201 00:10:11,944 --> 00:10:12,987 Hey. 202 00:10:13,070 --> 00:10:16,282 Hey, um, did you talk to Ruben yet? 203 00:10:16,365 --> 00:10:19,327 Yep, he wasn't happy about it, but I let him know it's Christmas 204 00:10:19,410 --> 00:10:20,745 and my family comes first. 205 00:10:20,828 --> 00:10:21,954 Great. 206 00:10:22,747 --> 00:10:28,252 So, uh, hey, listen, how would you feel about leaving two days later? 207 00:10:28,336 --> 00:10:29,170 Why? 208 00:10:29,253 --> 00:10:32,506 So I can go to work and make us some money. 209 00:10:32,965 --> 00:10:35,343 But I was gonna work and make us some money. 210 00:10:35,426 --> 00:10:37,595 Aww. Well, now you don't have to. Merry Christmas. 211 00:10:38,554 --> 00:10:40,514 Mandy, what is goin' on? 212 00:10:40,598 --> 00:10:44,518 OK. Um, the station called and they need me to fill in. 213 00:10:44,602 --> 00:10:46,604 You were the one yappin' about family time. 214 00:10:46,687 --> 00:10:51,233 I know, but if I do the weeknight weather, the next step is weekend anchor, 215 00:10:51,317 --> 00:10:53,361 which puts me in spittin' distance of weeknight anchor 216 00:10:53,444 --> 00:10:55,029 and that's basically how Oprah got started, 217 00:10:55,112 --> 00:10:56,906 and don't you want your wife to be Oprah? 218 00:10:58,115 --> 00:11:00,910 What about me? Don't you want me to be the Oprah of tires? 219 00:11:01,869 --> 00:11:03,162 That makes no sense. 220 00:11:03,537 --> 00:11:06,040 Well, there ain't no famous tire guy to compare to. 221 00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:09,710 All right. Fine. If you want me to give up 222 00:11:09,794 --> 00:11:12,797 on this huge opportunity for two extra days of family time, 223 00:11:12,880 --> 00:11:13,964 then I'll do it. 224 00:11:14,048 --> 00:11:16,258 - Great. - [scoffs] I'm not doing it. 225 00:11:19,136 --> 00:11:20,262 Michelin Man. 226 00:11:20,346 --> 00:11:22,306 I could be the next Michelin Man! 227 00:11:29,188 --> 00:11:31,482 I can't believe you gave in to her. 228 00:11:31,899 --> 00:11:33,484 This is so like you. 229 00:11:34,026 --> 00:11:36,028 Then it shouldn't be hard to believe. 230 00:11:37,154 --> 00:11:38,656 And how much money did it cost 231 00:11:38,739 --> 00:11:39,740 to change those tickets? 232 00:11:39,824 --> 00:11:42,201 Oh, it's Christmas, Audrey, it's not about the money. 233 00:11:42,284 --> 00:11:43,202 So, a lot. 234 00:11:43,285 --> 00:11:44,829 A shocking amount. 235 00:11:46,288 --> 00:11:49,542 I can't even remember why we wanted to do this. 236 00:11:50,084 --> 00:11:51,794 [scoffs] We? 237 00:11:53,587 --> 00:11:55,548 There's no we, this is all you! 238 00:11:55,631 --> 00:11:57,758 Don't you raise your voice at me. 239 00:11:57,842 --> 00:12:00,469 I was on the toilet mindin' my own business! 240 00:12:02,638 --> 00:12:03,639 Excuse me. 241 00:12:04,098 --> 00:12:06,976 When you fight, it's the children who suffer. 242 00:12:09,437 --> 00:12:10,479 Remember that. 243 00:12:16,110 --> 00:12:18,529 [telephone ringing] 244 00:12:19,947 --> 00:12:23,284 McAllister Auto. We never tire of takin' care of your tires. 245 00:12:24,076 --> 00:12:26,036 Your sister is driving me crazy. 246 00:12:26,287 --> 00:12:28,748 Somethin' she never tires of, am I right? 247 00:12:29,915 --> 00:12:33,127 Not in the mood, Georgie. I am at my wits' end. 248 00:12:33,627 --> 00:12:36,380 - So am I. - Missy, get off the phone. 249 00:12:36,922 --> 00:12:39,008 OK. Click. 250 00:12:39,592 --> 00:12:42,094 I know you just made the click noise with your mouth. 251 00:12:42,470 --> 00:12:43,763 What is goin' on? 252 00:12:43,846 --> 00:12:46,640 [sighs] Can your sister stay with you for Christmas? 253 00:12:47,099 --> 00:12:48,517 What happened to California? 254 00:12:48,601 --> 00:12:52,813 She wants me to spend the whole week in some hellhole called Pasadena. 255 00:12:53,272 --> 00:12:55,733 Sheldon is excited to show us his school. 256 00:12:55,816 --> 00:12:57,276 It's nowhere near a beach. 257 00:12:57,359 --> 00:12:58,986 [sighs] So, can she? 258 00:12:59,612 --> 00:13:03,115 I wish she could, but I'm goin' to Miami 259 00:13:03,199 --> 00:13:05,034 - with the McAllisters. - Really? 260 00:13:05,409 --> 00:13:08,037 Because when I asked you if you wanted to come to California, 261 00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:09,455 you said you had to work. 262 00:13:09,997 --> 00:13:12,124 Um, click. 263 00:13:12,374 --> 00:13:13,793 George Marshall Cooper. 264 00:13:14,168 --> 00:13:17,004 I didn't plan it, it was their gift to us. 265 00:13:17,129 --> 00:13:18,631 They're payin' for the whole thing. 266 00:13:18,714 --> 00:13:20,966 Oh. Well, because they have money, 267 00:13:21,050 --> 00:13:23,552 they get to spend Christmas with my granddaughter. 268 00:13:23,636 --> 00:13:26,180 Wait, you're going to the beach? Take me with you, 269 00:13:26,263 --> 00:13:27,223 please. 270 00:13:27,306 --> 00:13:29,725 I'm sorry. It's not my place to invite you. 271 00:13:29,809 --> 00:13:31,143 Well, there you go, Missy. 272 00:13:31,227 --> 00:13:33,729 Your brother picked his rich new family over us. 273 00:13:34,688 --> 00:13:36,899 - That ain't what's happenin'. - [tearfully] It's just 274 00:13:36,982 --> 00:13:40,361 ever since Dad died, I've been having such a hard time 275 00:13:40,444 --> 00:13:41,779 - and the holidays make it... - Cut that out. 276 00:13:43,280 --> 00:13:44,406 So hard to be an orphan. 277 00:13:44,490 --> 00:13:47,326 You are not an orphan. I am still alive! 278 00:13:52,331 --> 00:13:55,876 So, it looks like that storm front is gonna move off to the west 279 00:13:55,960 --> 00:13:58,712 leaving us with unseasonably warm Christmas. 280 00:13:58,796 --> 00:14:00,631 So, instead of milk and cookies, 281 00:14:00,714 --> 00:14:03,676 maybe leave Santa some sunscreen and a Speedo. 282 00:14:04,969 --> 00:14:06,053 And before I sign off, 283 00:14:06,178 --> 00:14:10,015 I just wanna wish everyone a safe and happy holiday. 284 00:14:10,349 --> 00:14:12,351 If only she were that nice in real life. 285 00:14:15,104 --> 00:14:16,105 Hey, y'all. 286 00:14:17,106 --> 00:14:18,524 You just missed Amanda. 287 00:14:18,816 --> 00:14:20,943 Let me guess, gonna be sunny and warm? 288 00:14:21,026 --> 00:14:24,947 Outside. In here, it's been a bit chilly. 289 00:14:25,573 --> 00:14:26,699 Oh, stop it. 290 00:14:26,782 --> 00:14:28,158 And cranky. 291 00:14:29,451 --> 00:14:32,329 [chuckles nervously] Anyways... 292 00:14:33,831 --> 00:14:35,875 I was wonderin' if I could ask a huge favor about the trip. 293 00:14:36,250 --> 00:14:38,210 I'm not changin' it again. 294 00:14:38,294 --> 00:14:42,590 No changes. It's just my sister's being a real pain in the ass to my mom. 295 00:14:42,965 --> 00:14:44,842 And I thought maybe she could go with us. 296 00:14:45,217 --> 00:14:49,096 You wanna bring an angry teenage girl on our family trip? 297 00:14:49,221 --> 00:14:51,348 Sounds like she'll fit right in. 298 00:14:52,892 --> 00:14:54,727 She's only rude to my mom. 299 00:14:54,810 --> 00:14:57,813 She's actually really sweet and responsible. 300 00:14:58,272 --> 00:15:02,151 Well, then, maybe she can babysit CeeCee when we go out to dinner. 301 00:15:02,234 --> 00:15:04,028 No, I ain't leavin' my daughter alone with her. 302 00:15:05,821 --> 00:15:08,490 ["It's The Most Wonderful Time of the Year" by Andy Williams playing] 303 00:15:11,827 --> 00:15:16,332 ♪ It's the most wonderful time of the year ♪ 304 00:15:16,415 --> 00:15:18,042 We're gonna miss our flight. 305 00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:20,252 I told you we should've left earlier. 306 00:15:20,336 --> 00:15:21,879 Should've left two days earlier. 307 00:15:22,338 --> 00:15:24,048 Oh, so, the traffic is my fault? 308 00:15:24,131 --> 00:15:26,383 We'd already be on the beach if it wasn't for your career. 309 00:15:26,467 --> 00:15:28,969 Well, someone has to pay off all the debt you put us in. 310 00:15:29,053 --> 00:15:31,972 So, is the hotel on the beach, near the beach, what are we talkin'? 311 00:15:32,056 --> 00:15:34,224 - Right on the beach. - Sweet. 312 00:15:34,308 --> 00:15:35,601 If we get there. 313 00:15:36,852 --> 00:15:38,979 And that debt is because I'm buildin' a future for our family. 314 00:15:39,063 --> 00:15:40,481 What do you think I'm doing? 315 00:15:40,564 --> 00:15:43,400 Can you keep it down? I can't hear the Christmas music. 316 00:15:43,484 --> 00:15:46,153 It's the most wonderful time of the year. You happy? 317 00:15:47,988 --> 00:15:51,075 - So, what's the drinkin' age in Florida? - You're not drinkin'. 318 00:15:51,158 --> 00:15:53,410 Well, I am, a lot. 319 00:15:53,494 --> 00:15:55,913 At least that Christmas tradition isn't getting ruined. 320 00:15:57,665 --> 00:15:59,375 All right, that is enough! 321 00:15:59,458 --> 00:16:02,169 We paid a lot of money to take you on a wonderful trip, 322 00:16:02,294 --> 00:16:04,338 so we're gonna stop our bitching 323 00:16:04,421 --> 00:16:06,840 and have a magical family Christmas we'll remember forever. 324 00:16:07,091 --> 00:16:09,385 Now, shut up and be grateful! 325 00:16:10,886 --> 00:16:11,887 I'm grateful. 326 00:16:12,304 --> 00:16:15,015 Thank you, Missy. You are a doll. 327 00:16:15,099 --> 00:16:16,100 Thanks. 328 00:16:17,059 --> 00:16:18,852 I don't know why my mom hates you. 329 00:16:21,021 --> 00:16:22,856 [thunder rumbling] 330 00:16:24,233 --> 00:16:26,235 You said the storm front was headin' west. 331 00:16:26,860 --> 00:16:28,737 Aww, you watched. 332 00:16:29,446 --> 00:16:31,281 My hair's gonna frizz. 333 00:16:31,365 --> 00:16:33,867 Maybe we should make a run for the hotel. 334 00:16:33,951 --> 00:16:35,369 It'll pass. 335 00:16:35,452 --> 00:16:36,745 [thunder rumbling] 336 00:16:36,829 --> 00:16:38,998 Still better than Christmas with Sheldon. 337 00:16:42,876 --> 00:16:46,755 [plays "The Twelve Days of Christmas" tune] 338 00:16:46,839 --> 00:16:51,301 ♪ On the worst day of Christmas My parents gave to me ♪ 339 00:16:51,385 --> 00:16:54,596 ♪ A trip to Miami ♪ 340 00:16:55,931 --> 00:16:59,018 ♪ We all sat in traffic The plane ran out of peanuts ♪ 341 00:16:59,101 --> 00:17:00,978 ♪ They lost Mom's luggage ♪ 342 00:17:01,061 --> 00:17:02,646 ♪ Didn't check in 'til midnight ♪ 343 00:17:02,730 --> 00:17:04,356 ♪ Then it started raining ♪ 344 00:17:04,440 --> 00:17:06,066 ♪ Dad ran in flip-flops ♪ 345 00:17:06,150 --> 00:17:07,735 ♪ He fell and it was funny ♪ 346 00:17:09,903 --> 00:17:13,282 ♪ The hotel bar served Missy liquor ♪ 347 00:17:14,867 --> 00:17:16,535 ♪ She threw up in the bushes ♪ 348 00:17:16,618 --> 00:17:19,580 ♪ Georgie got a cold Mandy got lice ♪ 349 00:17:19,663 --> 00:17:23,917 ♪ But I got to watch you Which was nice ♪ 350 00:17:29,882 --> 00:17:33,260 [narrator] Back in Medford, Ruben said, "Screw this!" 351 00:17:33,385 --> 00:17:34,845 He closed the store 352 00:17:34,928 --> 00:17:38,474 and joined his Puerto Rican family in Mexico. 353 00:17:38,557 --> 00:17:43,187 Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho! Merry Christmas, y'all. 354 00:17:43,270 --> 00:17:45,606 Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho! 355 00:17:48,609 --> 00:17:50,319 [theme music playing] 27488