Original subtitles

Take a look overhead, hey there, there goes a Spiderman.

In the chill of night, at the scene of a crime, like a street of lights,

he arrives just in time.

Spiderman, Spiderman, friendly neighborhood Spiderman, well-contained.

He's ignored, action is his reward to him.

Life is a great big hang up, wherever there's a hang up,

you'll find a Spiderman.

My spider senses are tingling, there's something wrong up there in Jameson's office.

Who's in here, show yourself.

Nobody.

Wonder whatever or whoever it was, wanted at Jameson's desk.

What's this?

Mr. J. Jonah Jameson, if you want the biggest news scoop of the year,

be at the Mark Renee Art Gallery at midnight.

The door will be open, come alone.

Son, Dr. Noah Boddy, Noah Boddy.

Nobody, that's it, nobody.

Spiderman had better be on hand to see that old J.J.J. doesn't get himself in trouble.

Miss Brand, do you know anything about this note from Dr. Noah Boddy?

No, Mr. Jameson, nobody's been through my office.

I mean, there's been no body, that is, I don't know anything about it.

Well, no one can say that J. Jonah Jameson isn't the newspaperman.

First, last, then always.

And if there's a scoop to be had, I'll be at the Mark Renee Gallery to get it.

Nearly midnight, wonder when the action starts.

Two minutes to go.

Where's that Dr. Boddy with my scoop?

Police.

In exactly one minute, the Mark Renee Gallery will be robbed of a famous painting, Leaves of Glass.

Leaves of Glass? Why, that's worth $100,000.

Uh-oh, trouble.

This must be my scoop.

Okay, mister, we were tipped you'd try to steal that painting.

What painting?

The one under your arm.

I've been framed. This is an outrage.

And I know who's behind all this, that web-headed weasel, Spider-Man.

Why, bless his flathead, I'm still his favorite subject.

Where are you, Parker? Visiting your boss?

Nope, bailing him out.

Good. You know, he's more trouble than all the other prisoners put together.

Now, I'll get even with that wall-crawling menace if it's the last thing I do.

I'll challenge him to come out in the open.

I'll say, "I, J. Jonah Jameson,"

challenge said Spider-Man to meet me at any place of his choice.

Spider-Man getting credit for humiliating Jameson.

I'll show them. With this machine to keep me invisible,

I have the power to force Jameson to retract his statements,

ridiculing my theories of invisibility.

And I think I can use Spider-Man to bait Jameson again.

Oh, Spider-Man, why, you, you, you, you, you bet your webbed head I'll be there.

That was Spider-Man?

It was. And he's agreed to sign a statement of apology.

Where does this historic meeting take place?

Ten o'clock tonight. Stephanie's jewelry store.

That's a strange time and place.

You mean, you think he won't show up?

Oh, no, I'm sure he will.

Well, Spider-Man, I'm here. Where are you?

Right here. And if I were you...

I always knew you were a coward.

Hear those sirens, J.J.? They're coming after you.

Don't say I didn't warn you.

Not you again.

Get Spider-Man. He's behind that curtain.

What are you trying to pull, Jameson?

Offhand, I say Joe Robbery.

It was Spider-Man, I tell you. I saw him with my own eyes.

Okay, Jameson, let's go.

All right, Doctor, nobody. I know you're here.

At last, Spider-Man, we meet, if you'll pardon the pun, face to face.

The chair.

Must leave you now, Spider-Man, but we shall meet again.

I have something to discuss with Mr. J. Jonah Jameson.

If I ever get my hands on that costume-quad Spider-Man, I'll break every web in his body.

You're free on battle, Jameson.

Well, it's about time that lazy kid showed up.

Tell me, Parker, what makes an upstanding citizen like Jameson turn to crime?

Nobody knows the answer to that.

Jameson here, in the press room.

Okay, I'll be right down.

Wait till you see the little surprise I have for you, Mr. Jameson.

What he's doing down here.

All right, where's the trouble?

Say, what is this?

This is where you're going to eke your words for ridiculing my fear of invisibility.

Help! Stop!

It's Jameson, brother. I'll bet my website's tangling with Dr. Noah Foddy.

Spider-Man, I knew you were in on this.

You said we'd meet again, nobody. Now show yourself.

It's too late, Spider-Man. I will now use my theory only for evil.

There he goes.

You did that on purpose.

You have a talent for getting in the way.

I'll get you for this, Spider-Man.

Just like catching fish in a bowl.

Oops, the big one got away.

So, that's where my fish went.

I'm beginning to materialize, and that will never do with Spider-Man around.

Watch the birdie. I will destroy you.

This should switch things.

Thanks for putting yourself on the spot, nobody.

I'd better turn this off before the net becomes invisible.

Jameson framed by this invisible menace.

Compliments of your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man.

I can't see anything. How do we know he's here?

Spidey's never goofed yet.

Listen to this.

Dear sir, I have a theory to transport my body by thought transference.

Oh, brother.

Remember Dr. Noah Boddy's theory and how you scoffed at him?

Take a letter, Miss Brandt. Tell the writer of the letter.

I believe him. I believe him.

This is the source of the world featuring the "Ginjameer Ruby".

The "Ginjameer Ruby".

That's the ruby donated by the Maharaja of "Ginjameer".

Something tells me that slinky solo means trouble.

Now, that's a new approach.

This time, I'll call the tune.

Music may have charm, but this is too much.

That pitch pipe may move webs, but it doesn't move me.

It will, O costume gun. It will.

What a good websnappers.

That's got to be the trick of the week.

And he got away with the ruby.

No doubt about it. Only Spider-Man could have stolen that ruby.

And now the Maharaja arrives on his yacht and refuses to see anybody until the ruby is found.

It's up to you, Parker. I want pics of the yacht, the Maharaja, and the ruby.

But the ruby was stolen.

I don't want excuses. I want pictures.

But Mr. Jameson, no one can board a ship without the captain's permission.

I don't care how Parker gets the pictures, Miss Brandt. Just get them.

Yes, sir.

Better keep out of sight of the welcoming committee.

Talk about floating palaces.

Either the ginger mere ruby has a twin or a vast number.

Oops.

Time for a disappearing act, boys.

It seems I've heard that song before.

Hey, how about turning off that hornpipe?

Put this interloper in the brig.

We'll let the Maharaja decide his fate.

Well, I got aboard, but this isn't quite the way I planned it.

The little spider worked and worked to make himself a tool, I hope.

Sounds like the peerless potentate's got company.

As soon as Mrs. Van Gier's Sapphire, the star of ginger mere is aboard,

we cast off and leave these foreign fools.

Oops. There go my spider senses.

After him, don't let him escape.

Sure, guns are too noisy. My pets will take care of him.

Now put that pie piper up to him.

Crocodiles. But they're no illusion. They're for real.

Police patrol. We can't afford to be suspected.

That's the best song he's played yet.

Ahoy there.

Thanks, fellas.

The harbor is no place for a midnight swim, Spider-Man.

You can say that again.

There's something fishy about that, Maharaja, but I can't quite put my finger on it.

Why would he steal a ruby that already belongs to him?

If I can get to Mrs. Van Gier's Star Sapphire before the faker does,

my signal device may lead me to the answer.

It's so nice of the Daily Bugle to take an interest in my little bauble

and to send such a charming young man to take pictures of it.

With the Maharaja of Gingerbeer here to attend the jeweler's convention,

the paper thought it would be good publicity,

especially as the proceeds go to your favorite charity.

Do you mind if I rearrange the setting?

Not at all, young man.

I understand the Star of Gingerbeer was a present from the Maharaja himself.

Yes, such a nice man, so kind and friendly.

This is so exciting.

It may get even more exciting.

Unless my hunch is wrong, the faker will make a grab for that sapphire tonight.

My sapphire! My beautiful sapphire!

Spider-Man! Oh, you're too late!

Are you all right?

Yes, but that wicked little man took my sapphire.

As soon as I free you, call the police and send them to the Maharaja's yacht.

I will not embarrass the Maharaja by sending the police.

After all, he gave it to me.

Maybe he's an East Indian giver, but if you want your sapphire back,

Mrs. VanMeer, you'd better send them.

If I follow the flute, I may not need my homing di--

Yow! Talk about hot meat!

From now on, I'll stick to my old tried-and-true Spidey device.

It looks like nobody's home but us Maharajas.

He must have hurt me.

Hello there, I'm your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man.

Just thought I'd drop by and pick up that sapphire.

It will snap my webs.

That's what's been bugging me.

He's a dummy.

You are quite right, Spider-Man.

I arranged for the real Maharaja to help me.

I arranged for the real Maharaja to have a little engine trouble with his yacht.

He should be arriving sometime tomorrow.

But by then, we shall be gone with the jewels of great price.

And the famous Spider-Man will also be among the missing.

Yipes! Ouch!

If I don't get off these nails, my feet will be Swiss cheese.

What?

The flute won't work for you, Spider-Man.

Who needs a flute?

Looks like Mrs. Van Bier sent the police after all.

Try and toot your way out of this.

Fiendish faker, fettered by your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man.

Well, Spider-Man did it again.

A fake Maharaja and a phony faker.

Does that mean Peter won't get his bonus?

Bonus?

I sent him after pictures of the Maharaja, not a dummy.

Bonus indeed.

Which reminds me, where is that lazy kid?

He's never around when you want him.

Spider-Man, Spider-Man, does whatever a spider can.

Spins a web, any size, catch his feet, just like flies, look out.

Here comes the Spider-Man.

Is he strong? Listen, Doug, he's got radio, active blood.

He's got radio, active blood.

Spider-Man, Spider-Man, Spider-Man, Spider-Man.

He's got radio, active blood.

Can you swing from a thread?

Take a look overhead.

Hey there, there goes a Spider-Man.

In the chill of night, at the scene of a crime, like a street of lights, he arrives just in time.

Spider-Man, Spider-Man, friendly neighborhood Spider-Man.

Well contained, he's ignored, action is his reward to him.

Life is a great big hang up, wherever there's a hang up, you'll find a Spider-Man.