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1
00:00:10,030 --> 00:00:11,430
- PREVIOUSLY ON
CALIFORNICATION...
2
00:00:11,460 --> 00:00:13,200
- I AM RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF
A NASTY DIVORCE.
3
00:00:13,230 --> 00:00:15,600
- OH, YOU CAN PLAY HARD TO GET
ALL YOU LIKE, RUNKLE.
4
00:00:15,630 --> 00:00:18,770
BUT SUE COLLINI
ALWAYS GETS THE WEENIE.
5
00:00:18,800 --> 00:00:20,100
- HOW'S IT GOING,
PROFESSOR?
6
00:00:20,140 --> 00:00:21,570
- IN A WORD?
AWESOME.
7
00:00:21,610 --> 00:00:23,810
- LOOK, HANK,
I KNOW YOU'RE NOT EXACTLY
8
00:00:23,840 --> 00:00:27,080
WHAT ANYONE WOULD CALL
AN EDUCATION PROFESSIONAL.
9
00:00:27,110 --> 00:00:28,780
BUT MY WIFE WENT OUT
ON A LIMB FOR YOU.
10
00:00:28,810 --> 00:00:30,780
- [imitates Popeye]
11
00:00:30,810 --> 00:00:31,680
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF JACKIE?
12
00:00:31,720 --> 00:00:33,620
- YOU'RE OLD ENOUGH
TO BE HER FATHER.
13
00:00:33,650 --> 00:00:35,250
- YOU FIND ME IRRESISTIBLE?
14
00:00:35,290 --> 00:00:37,450
- HAS A WOMAN EVER PUNCHED YOU
IN THE FACE?
15
00:00:37,490 --> 00:00:38,520
- YOU KNOW WHAT?
YOU SHOULD USE ME.
16
00:00:38,560 --> 00:00:40,460
- REALLY?
- MM-HMM.
17
00:00:40,490 --> 00:00:42,390
THIS IS WHERE YOU WORK?
- YOU WANNA COME INSIDE?
18
00:00:42,430 --> 00:00:43,530
- WOULD THAT INVOLVE
SEEING YOU NAKED?
19
00:00:43,560 --> 00:00:46,130
- OH, MOST DEFINITELY.
- I THINK NOT.
20
00:00:46,160 --> 00:00:47,700
IN THE INTEREST
OF STUDENT-TEACHER RELATIONS.
21
00:00:47,730 --> 00:00:50,470
- WE'RE BEING ALL NORMAL
AND RESPONSIBLE, AND--
22
00:00:50,500 --> 00:00:51,600
- WHAT IF IN THE PROCESS,
23
00:00:51,640 --> 00:00:52,840
WE JUST KIND OF GET OVER
EACH OTHER?
24
00:00:52,870 --> 00:00:57,340
- WHAT IF YOU TELL ME
ABOUT OUR DAUGHTER?
25
00:00:57,370 --> 00:00:59,410
- WHO ARE YOU TEXTING?
- CHELSEA.
26
00:00:59,440 --> 00:01:02,310
TO TELL HER YOU'RE BEING
A TOTAL DICK RIGHT NOW.
27
00:01:04,650 --> 00:01:06,420
I FUCKING HATE YOU!
28
00:01:06,450 --> 00:01:09,450
- AND I FUCKING HATE YOU TOO,
YOU LITTLE SHIT!
29
00:01:15,530 --> 00:01:18,500
[Queens of the Stone Age's You
Got A Killer Scene There, Man]
30
00:01:18,530 --> 00:01:24,470
*
31
00:01:24,500 --> 00:01:26,770
- * DON'T WANNA
LOVE YOU NO MORE *
32
00:01:26,800 --> 00:01:30,140
* DON'T WANNA LOVE YOU LESS
33
00:01:30,170 --> 00:01:34,380
* I WANNA BE CRUSHED
BY YOUR SWEET CARESS *
34
00:01:34,410 --> 00:01:36,480
* WHAT'S THE FUCKIN'
DIFFERENCE *
35
00:01:36,510 --> 00:01:39,280
* WE ALL GONNA DIE
36
00:01:39,320 --> 00:01:41,520
- NO, NO, NO, NO.
YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THAT.
37
00:01:41,550 --> 00:01:44,550
NOT ON MY ACCOUNT.
38
00:01:44,590 --> 00:01:46,690
OH, WELL YOU SEE
THAT IS A PRIME EXAMPLE
39
00:01:46,720 --> 00:01:48,730
OF WHAT'S WRONG WITH
THE YOUNGER GENERATION TODAY.
40
00:01:48,760 --> 00:01:50,760
YOU LEAVE NOTHING
TO THE IMAGINATION.
41
00:01:50,790 --> 00:01:52,900
SO YOU'VE GOT YOURSELF
SOME BOOBS.
42
00:01:52,930 --> 00:01:55,470
*
43
00:01:55,500 --> 00:01:57,870
SOME NICE, BIG,
ROUND BOOBS.
44
00:01:57,900 --> 00:01:59,500
*
45
00:01:59,540 --> 00:02:01,510
EVERYBODY'S GOT 'EM.
46
00:02:01,540 --> 00:02:03,540
YOU KNOW,
NOTHING TO GET EXCITED ABOUT.
47
00:02:03,570 --> 00:02:06,310
*
48
00:02:06,340 --> 00:02:07,940
YOU KNOW, JUST...
49
00:02:07,980 --> 00:02:16,150
*
50
00:02:17,720 --> 00:02:21,630
- HANK?
51
00:02:21,660 --> 00:02:23,690
HANK.
52
00:02:23,730 --> 00:02:26,260
HANK.
53
00:02:26,300 --> 00:02:28,830
HANK MOODY.
- YES, FRAULEIN.
54
00:02:28,870 --> 00:02:30,970
- DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING
YOU'D CARE TO ADD?
55
00:02:31,000 --> 00:02:32,540
- ON THE SUBJECT OF?
56
00:02:32,570 --> 00:02:34,970
- ON THE SUBJECT OF THE SUBJECT
WE WERE JUST DISCUSSING.
57
00:02:35,000 --> 00:02:37,470
- OH, THAT SUBJECT.
58
00:02:37,510 --> 00:02:40,740
UM, LET ME THINK.
59
00:02:40,780 --> 00:02:41,810
NOT A THING. NOPE.
60
00:02:41,850 --> 00:02:43,810
WAIT, NO, THERE IS SOMETHING
I WOULD LIKE TO SAY.
61
00:02:43,850 --> 00:02:45,650
- EXCELLENT.
WE'RE ALL EARS.
62
00:02:45,680 --> 00:02:46,950
- DO YOU THINK THE LADIES
HAVE GONE TOO FAR
63
00:02:46,980 --> 00:02:48,820
WITH THE SEX-POSITIVE
FEMINISM?
64
00:02:48,850 --> 00:02:50,620
I MEAN, I KNOW THEY ALL SAY
THEY'RE DOWN
65
00:02:50,650 --> 00:02:54,290
WITH THE PORNOGRAPHY AND
THE SHAVED PUDENDA AND WHATNOT,
66
00:02:54,320 --> 00:02:56,690
BUT DO WE REALLY THINK THAT
THIS IS THE PATH TO LIBERATION?
67
00:02:56,730 --> 00:02:58,830
EZRA POUND.
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
68
00:02:58,860 --> 00:03:01,570
- I'M NOT SURE THIS IS
THE PROPER FORUM
69
00:03:01,600 --> 00:03:02,670
FOR SUCH A DISCUSSION, HANK.
70
00:03:02,700 --> 00:03:04,770
- WELL, YOU ASKED ME.
I'M JUST THINKING OUT LOUD.
71
00:03:04,800 --> 00:03:06,700
SPITBALL.
- OKAY, EVERYONE.
72
00:03:06,740 --> 00:03:08,370
THAT'LL DO IT FOR TODAY.
- ALREADY?
73
00:03:08,410 --> 00:03:09,510
- THANKS FOR COMING.
- GEEZ. MY LORD.
74
00:03:09,540 --> 00:03:10,710
- YEAH, SEE YOU ALL TONIGHT.
75
00:03:10,740 --> 00:03:12,540
YOU TOO, HANK.
CORRECT?
76
00:03:12,580 --> 00:03:14,710
- I'M SORRY?
- TONIGHT. MY HOUSE.
77
00:03:14,740 --> 00:03:17,610
ENGLISH DEPARTMENT FALL MIXER.
RING ANY BELLS?
78
00:03:17,650 --> 00:03:18,850
- NOT A ONE.
79
00:03:18,880 --> 00:03:20,480
- OH, IT'S JUST A LITTLE
GET TOGETHER WE HAVE
80
00:03:20,520 --> 00:03:22,550
AT THE START
OF EVERY SCHOOL YEAR.
81
00:03:22,590 --> 00:03:25,960
FACULTY, GRAD STUDENTS,
SOME WINE, SOME CHEESE.
82
00:03:25,990 --> 00:03:28,790
- WELL, THAT SOUNDS AWESOME
AND I'M STOKED,
83
00:03:28,830 --> 00:03:31,460
BUT ALAS, I'VE GOT PLANS
WITH THE SOUL-SUCKING VAMPIRE
84
00:03:31,500 --> 00:03:33,600
I CALL MY DAUGHTER TONIGHT,
SO I GOTTA TAKE A RAIN CHECK--
85
00:03:33,630 --> 00:03:35,300
- WELL NO, CHELSEA'S
ALREADY ASKED
86
00:03:35,330 --> 00:03:36,930
IF BECCA CAN SPEND THE NIGHT.
87
00:03:36,970 --> 00:03:38,570
- YES, BUT I THINK
SHE'LL CHANGE HER PLANS
88
00:03:38,600 --> 00:03:40,770
WHEN SHE HEARS WHAT
HER OLD MAN'S GOT ON TAP.
89
00:03:40,800 --> 00:03:42,440
BESIDES,
WINE GIVES ME A HEADACHE
90
00:03:42,470 --> 00:03:43,740
AND CHEESE MAKES ME FART,
A LOT.
91
00:03:43,770 --> 00:03:45,580
YOU DON'T WANT ME
STINKING UP THE PLACE.
92
00:03:45,610 --> 00:03:47,380
- NOW WHAT IF I SAID
93
00:03:47,410 --> 00:03:50,450
YOUR JOB DEPENDS ON IT,
HANK?
94
00:03:53,480 --> 00:03:55,350
- ARE YOU SEXUALLY HARASSING ME
RIGHT NOW?
95
00:03:55,390 --> 00:03:56,550
BECAUSE IF YOU ARE,
96
00:03:56,590 --> 00:03:59,360
I THINK I'M GONNA HAVE
TO REPORT YOU.
97
00:03:59,390 --> 00:04:02,590
FOR GIVING ME
A SERIOUS BONER.
98
00:04:02,630 --> 00:04:05,260
- GOOD TO KNOW.
SEE YOU AT 7:00.
99
00:04:09,830 --> 00:04:11,700
- NO MEANS NO, YOU KNOW.
100
00:04:11,740 --> 00:04:14,700
[upbeat music]
101
00:04:14,740 --> 00:04:22,680
*
102
00:04:54,740 --> 00:04:57,610
- THIS MAN IS RUINING MY LIFE.
103
00:04:57,650 --> 00:05:00,120
- BY MAKING IT
UNBEARABLY AWESOME.
104
00:05:00,150 --> 00:05:02,420
- SWEETIE, I'M NOT REALLY SURE
I UNDERSTAND
105
00:05:02,450 --> 00:05:03,590
WHAT THE PROBLEM IS.
106
00:05:03,620 --> 00:05:04,990
- HE'S DELUSIONAL.
107
00:05:05,020 --> 00:05:07,120
HE THINKS WE'RE GOING TO
HANG OUT AND BOND OR SOMETHING.
108
00:05:07,160 --> 00:05:11,800
- OKAY, HAND IT OVER.
THANK YOU.
109
00:05:11,830 --> 00:05:13,460
YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND, WOMAN.
I HAVE A PLAN.
110
00:05:13,500 --> 00:05:14,930
- YOU DO?
111
00:05:14,960 --> 00:05:16,530
- YES, IF WE NEVER LEAVE
THE HOUSE,
112
00:05:16,570 --> 00:05:18,440
NOTHING BAD CAN EVER HAPPEN.
113
00:05:18,470 --> 00:05:20,640
- RIGHT, 'CAUSE, LIKE,
YOUR PARENTS NEVER FUCK YOU UP.
114
00:05:20,670 --> 00:05:21,870
- NO, YOU SEE,
YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO FIND
115
00:05:21,910 --> 00:05:22,910
THAT LAST REMARK CHARMING.
116
00:05:22,940 --> 00:05:25,010
[phone chimes]
- HOLD--
117
00:05:25,040 --> 00:05:28,110
- HELLO? THIS THING ON?
118
00:05:28,140 --> 00:05:29,910
- YEAH, YEAH, YEAH,
HEY, UH,
119
00:05:29,950 --> 00:05:33,380
I'M HERE, I JUST, UM, MY BOSS
IS TRYING TO GET THROUGH.
120
00:05:33,420 --> 00:05:36,120
I'M--I'M LATE FOR A DINNER
WITH HIM AND SOME CLIENTS, SO.
121
00:05:36,150 --> 00:05:37,320
- WELL, DON'T GO.
JUST BLOW IT OFF.
122
00:05:37,350 --> 00:05:39,990
- PLEASE, WILL YOU TAKE CARE
OF THE BECCA THING, PLEASE?
123
00:05:40,020 --> 00:05:42,660
- YES. I WILL TAKE CARE OF IT.
124
00:05:42,690 --> 00:05:43,990
- BYE. BYE.
125
00:05:44,030 --> 00:05:46,460
- BECCA!
- YES, FATHER?
126
00:05:46,500 --> 00:05:48,000
- DON YOUR BEST FROCK.
127
00:05:48,030 --> 00:05:50,700
THE WINE AND CHEESE AWAITS.
128
00:05:53,440 --> 00:05:56,470
- YOU SEE THAT BATHROOM
OVER YONDER?
129
00:05:56,510 --> 00:05:59,110
- ONCE,
I TOOK EVERY CROOKED INCH
130
00:05:59,140 --> 00:06:01,980
JACKIE GLEASON
HAD TO OFFER IN THAT STALL.
131
00:06:02,010 --> 00:06:05,050
SIGNED KRISTOFFERSON
RIGHT HERE IN THIS BOOTH.
132
00:06:05,080 --> 00:06:09,420
YEAH, TIME THERE WAS
WHEN I WOULD GET WET
133
00:06:09,450 --> 00:06:10,550
OFF A GREAT SIGN.
134
00:06:10,590 --> 00:06:12,120
OH, THAT'S RIGHT.
135
00:06:12,160 --> 00:06:15,930
I'M TALKING DRIPPING,
FUCKING GANGES WET.
136
00:06:15,960 --> 00:06:17,060
- [clears throat]
137
00:06:17,090 --> 00:06:18,190
SPEAKING OF
THE GOOD OLD DAYS--
138
00:06:18,230 --> 00:06:19,630
- HEY, YEAH.
SUE COLLINI?
139
00:06:19,660 --> 00:06:20,730
- OVER THERE, SIR.
140
00:06:20,760 --> 00:06:23,670
- HEY, SPRINGFIELD.
GET YOUR TONED TUSH OVER HERE.
141
00:06:23,700 --> 00:06:26,170
- SORRY I'M LATE.
142
00:06:26,200 --> 00:06:28,540
SOME TARZANA HOUSEWIFE PAID A
GRAND TO SPEND THE DAY WITH ME.
143
00:06:28,570 --> 00:06:29,770
SHE WANTED TO MAKE OUT,
SO I DID HER A SOLID
144
00:06:29,810 --> 00:06:32,840
AND I ATE THAT BUTTERSCOTCH
FOR, LIKE, 45 MINUTES STRAIGHT.
145
00:06:32,880 --> 00:06:34,710
MM-HMM.
- RIGHT, RICK.
146
00:06:34,740 --> 00:06:38,010
THIS IS MY SUBORDINATE
AND PROSPECTIVE BOYTOY,
147
00:06:38,050 --> 00:06:39,580
CHARLES W. RUNKLE.
- PLEASURE.
148
00:06:39,620 --> 00:06:40,850
SUE AND I USED TO
SEE EACH OTHER, YOU KNOW.
149
00:06:40,880 --> 00:06:41,950
EARLY '80s.
150
00:06:41,990 --> 00:06:45,690
- RICK, IN WHAT UNIVERSE
IS FUCKING LIKE CHINCHILLAS
151
00:06:45,720 --> 00:06:47,660
AND BLOWING COKE UP
EACH OTHER'S ASSES
152
00:06:47,690 --> 00:06:49,660
"SEEING EACH OTHER"?
153
00:06:49,690 --> 00:06:51,090
- I'M A BIG FAN
OF YOUR OEUVRE, RICK.
154
00:06:51,130 --> 00:06:52,930
ALL OF IT.
155
00:06:52,960 --> 00:06:54,100
THE MUSIC, THE ACTING--
156
00:06:54,130 --> 00:06:55,770
- HEY, I'M FLATTERED.
157
00:06:55,800 --> 00:06:56,730
YOU KNOW,
LIKE I SAID ON THE PHONE,
158
00:06:56,770 --> 00:06:58,670
I MEAN, I'M NOT LOOKING
FOR REPRESENTATION.
159
00:06:58,700 --> 00:07:00,900
- OH, BULLSHIT.
160
00:07:00,940 --> 00:07:02,740
HOUSEWIVES IN TARZANA?
161
00:07:02,770 --> 00:07:05,010
RICK, DON'T TELL ME
THAT YOU DON'T WANNA
162
00:07:05,040 --> 00:07:06,910
RAWDOG THE TOP SHELF
LIKE YOU USED TO
163
00:07:06,940 --> 00:07:08,780
IN YOUR PRIME, HUH?
164
00:07:08,810 --> 00:07:11,050
- ALL DUE RESPECT, SUE,
LIFE JUST ISN'T ABOUT THE PUSSY.
165
00:07:11,080 --> 00:07:13,920
IT'S ABOUT FINDING YOUR PASSION
AND NEVER LETTING GO,
166
00:07:13,950 --> 00:07:16,020
AND THIS MAN HAS DONE
JUST THAT.
167
00:07:16,050 --> 00:07:17,620
- QUIT LICKING HIS SHAFT.
168
00:07:17,650 --> 00:07:20,620
HE'S ALWAYS BEEN A PRIME CUT
OF USDA BEEFCAKE,
169
00:07:20,660 --> 00:07:21,890
AND HE KNOWS IT.
170
00:07:21,930 --> 00:07:24,030
- SURE, THE LADIES LOVE HIM.
171
00:07:24,060 --> 00:07:25,660
SEPTEMBER 7, 2002,
172
00:07:25,700 --> 00:07:28,500
THE BEST SEX I EVER HAD
WITH MY WIFE.
173
00:07:28,530 --> 00:07:30,200
RICK SPRINGFIELD
AT THE UNIVERSAL AMPHITHEATER,
174
00:07:30,230 --> 00:07:33,540
WAS LIKE THREE SOLID HOURS
OF FOREPLAY, DUDE.
175
00:07:33,570 --> 00:07:36,540
EVERYTHING SHE WANTED
TO DO WITH HIM IN 1982
176
00:07:36,570 --> 00:07:38,880
BUT DIDN'T KNOW HOW,
SHE DID WITH ME REPEATEDLY
177
00:07:38,910 --> 00:07:40,010
AND I THANK YOU, SIR.
178
00:07:40,040 --> 00:07:41,550
- FAT LOT OF GOOD
THAT DOES ME.
179
00:07:41,580 --> 00:07:43,180
- OKAY, RUNKLE,
GET TO THE POINT.
180
00:07:43,210 --> 00:07:44,950
- FIRST,
WE GET YOU SOME INDIE CRED.
181
00:07:44,980 --> 00:07:48,890
LET'S FIND YOU YOUR
WRESTLER, LIKE MICKEY ROURKE.
182
00:07:48,920 --> 00:07:51,760
LET'S SEE YOU BLOW PEOPLE AWAY
WITH YOUR SERIOUS SIDE, HUH?
183
00:07:51,790 --> 00:07:54,560
GET AN OSCAR NOM
FOR PLAYING AN ADDICT,
184
00:07:54,590 --> 00:07:55,930
A CRIPPLE, A RETARD,
WHATEVER.
185
00:07:55,960 --> 00:07:58,230
THEN YOU GO INTO
EVERY OFFICE IN TOWN
186
00:07:58,260 --> 00:07:59,700
AND YOU HIT 'EM WITH
YOUR PASSION PROJECT.
187
00:07:59,730 --> 00:08:01,670
THAT'S HOW YOU GET IT DONE.
188
00:08:01,700 --> 00:08:03,530
AND HARRY GREENBERG AGENCY
ACTUALLY HAS THE MOJO
189
00:08:03,570 --> 00:08:04,800
TO MAKE SOMETHING
LIKE THAT HAPPEN?
190
00:08:04,830 --> 00:08:07,740
- FUCK NO.
YOU SUPPLY THE MOJO.
191
00:08:07,770 --> 00:08:10,170
WE TAKE CARE
OF EVERYTHING ELSE.
192
00:08:10,210 --> 00:08:13,280
- I LIKE THE SOUND OF THAT.
193
00:08:13,310 --> 00:08:17,880
CHURCH.
194
00:08:17,910 --> 00:08:19,580
- YOU'RE SCARING ME, SUE.
195
00:08:19,620 --> 00:08:21,920
DOES THAT MEAN YOU LIKE THAT?
196
00:08:21,950 --> 00:08:24,090
OH...
197
00:08:24,120 --> 00:08:26,220
[growls]
198
00:08:29,760 --> 00:08:31,560
AHH.
199
00:08:40,270 --> 00:08:43,640
- FINALLY.
GOD, WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG?
200
00:08:43,670 --> 00:08:44,770
WHAT UP, HANK?
201
00:08:44,810 --> 00:08:46,010
- BECCA, THIS IS
YOUR LAST CHANCE
202
00:08:46,040 --> 00:08:47,140
TO CHANGE YOUR MIND,
COME ON.
203
00:08:47,180 --> 00:08:48,780
- JUST DO ME ONE FAVOR.
204
00:08:48,810 --> 00:08:50,210
- ANYTHING, MY CHURLISH LOVE.
205
00:08:50,250 --> 00:08:52,350
- TRY NOT TO GET
TOO HAMMERED.
206
00:08:52,380 --> 00:08:55,150
DON'T PUT DADDY IN A CORNER.
207
00:08:55,180 --> 00:08:56,990
- OH, HANK.
YOU DON'T WANNA PARK THERE.
208
00:08:57,020 --> 00:08:59,120
DEAN HATES IT WHEN
YOU BLOCK THE ENTRANCE.
209
00:08:59,160 --> 00:09:01,120
- HMM, BIG DATE TONIGHT?
210
00:09:01,160 --> 00:09:03,030
- IS IT THAT OBVIOUS?
211
00:09:03,060 --> 00:09:05,290
- THAT DRESS COULD CURE
CANCER!
212
00:09:05,330 --> 00:09:06,860
- [laughs]
213
00:09:06,900 --> 00:09:08,970
- I THINK YOU SHOULD
FUCK HIM.
214
00:09:09,000 --> 00:09:10,000
YOU KNOW, IF HE AGREED
TO MEET YOU
215
00:09:10,030 --> 00:09:12,200
AT THIS SAD ASSEMBLY
OF TWO-BIT INTELLECTUALS,
216
00:09:12,240 --> 00:09:13,440
HE CLEARLY DIGS THE SHIT
OUT OF YOU.
217
00:09:13,470 --> 00:09:17,140
- WOW, YOU HAVE THE ABILITY
TO MAKE A SIMPLE COCKTAIL PARTY
218
00:09:17,170 --> 00:09:19,610
INTO THE WORST THING
THAT'S EVER HAPPENED TO YOU.
219
00:09:19,640 --> 00:09:21,310
- IT'S A GIFT, REALLY.
- THERE YOU ARE.
220
00:09:21,340 --> 00:09:22,910
DID YOU TWO COME TOGETHER?
221
00:09:22,950 --> 00:09:24,750
- NO.
WE JUST CAME IN TOGETHER.
222
00:09:24,780 --> 00:09:25,850
- OH, I SEE.
223
00:09:25,880 --> 00:09:27,920
- AND I ACTUALLY GET
MORE BARS OUTSIDE, EXCUSE ME.
224
00:09:29,350 --> 00:09:31,090
- DID YOU HAPPEN TO SEE WHERE
BECCA AND CHELSEA GOT OFF TO?
225
00:09:31,120 --> 00:09:33,220
- THEY'RE FINE. THEY WENT
STRAIGHT TO CHELSEA'S ROOM.
226
00:09:33,260 --> 00:09:34,190
- OH.
- COME IN, COME IN.
227
00:09:34,220 --> 00:09:36,360
I HAVE SO MANY PEOPLE
I WANT YOU TO MEET.
228
00:09:36,390 --> 00:09:38,160
- OH?
229
00:09:41,430 --> 00:09:44,130
- COME ON, BABY.
CELEBRATE WITH ME.
230
00:09:44,170 --> 00:09:46,400
- DON'T BABY ME, JACKASS.
NO.
231
00:09:46,440 --> 00:09:48,170
FUCK NO.
I GOT A DATE.
232
00:09:48,200 --> 00:09:50,670
- WELL, DROP THE ZERO
AND GET WITH THE HERO.
233
00:09:50,710 --> 00:09:51,780
I SIGNED A BIG FISH TODAY.
234
00:09:51,810 --> 00:09:53,710
- OH, WELL GOOD FOR YOU.
235
00:09:53,740 --> 00:09:55,210
MAYBE YOU CAN MOVE
THE FUCK OUT NOW.
236
00:09:55,240 --> 00:09:58,650
- RIGHT. WELL.
FORCE OF HABIT, I GUESS.
237
00:09:58,680 --> 00:10:00,280
EVERY TIME I SIGN A CLIENT,
238
00:10:00,320 --> 00:10:01,950
I JUST CAN'T HELP
BUT PICTURE THE TWO OF US
239
00:10:01,990 --> 00:10:03,690
WITH A BOTTLE OF BUBBLY.
240
00:10:03,720 --> 00:10:05,220
- WELL, THAT WAS THEN,
CHARLIE.
241
00:10:05,250 --> 00:10:08,930
- AND THIS IS NOW.
GOT IT.
242
00:10:08,960 --> 00:10:11,930
OKAY, WELL...
243
00:10:11,960 --> 00:10:13,160
HAVE A NICE DATE.
244
00:10:13,200 --> 00:10:15,670
- YEAH, THANKS.
245
00:10:20,840 --> 00:10:23,070
[distant car alarm blaring]
246
00:10:23,110 --> 00:10:24,410
- RUNKLE,
YOU WERE ON FIRE TODAY.
247
00:10:24,440 --> 00:10:28,440
I MEAN, THAT WAS SERIOUS
SWIFTY LAZAR SHIT.
248
00:10:28,480 --> 00:10:32,320
I'VE NEVER BEEN SO PROUD
AND SO WET...
249
00:10:32,350 --> 00:10:34,820
AT THE SAME TIME.
250
00:10:34,850 --> 00:10:37,850
COME ON.
251
00:10:42,890 --> 00:10:46,300
- THANK YOU.
252
00:10:46,330 --> 00:10:48,300
- HOW MANY JOBS DO YOU HAVE,
LADY?
253
00:10:48,330 --> 00:10:50,770
YOU GOT A PAPER ROUTE TOO?
254
00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:53,070
FILL THIS THING UP.
SCOTCH PREFERABLY.
255
00:10:53,100 --> 00:10:54,340
I'M COMING OFF
OF A LENGTHY CONVERSATION
256
00:10:54,370 --> 00:10:55,540
WITH A MAN
IN A SWEATER VEST.
257
00:10:55,570 --> 00:10:58,140
- DEAN KOONS KEEPS THE GOOD
STUFF LOCKED IN HIS OFFICE.
258
00:10:58,170 --> 00:10:59,840
- WHICH WOULD BE WHERE,
EXACTLY?
259
00:10:59,880 --> 00:11:01,110
- I CAN'T TELL YOU THAT.
260
00:11:01,140 --> 00:11:03,750
PEOPLE LIKE YOU MESS
WITH THE MASTER'S SHIT.
261
00:11:03,780 --> 00:11:05,350
PEOPLE LIKE ME
GET BLAMED FOR IT.
262
00:11:05,380 --> 00:11:07,080
- CLASS WARRIOR, ARE WE?
263
00:11:07,120 --> 00:11:09,390
- JUST A GIRL SAVING FOR
A RAINY DAY.
264
00:11:09,420 --> 00:11:12,260
YOU KNOW, THE TRUTH IS
I'M A PRETTY SHITTY BARTENDER.
265
00:11:12,290 --> 00:11:15,220
BUT I AM
A KICK ASS STRIPPER.
266
00:11:15,260 --> 00:11:17,460
THIS BOD IS THE TRUE GIFT
THAT GOD GAVE ME.
267
00:11:17,490 --> 00:11:19,200
- I AGREE, BUT I THINK YOU'RE
SELLING YOURSELF SHORT STILL.
268
00:11:19,230 --> 00:11:21,970
- WHAT, I'M TOO SMART
TO BE A STRIPPER?
269
00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:23,270
- SMART HAS NOTHING
TO DO WITH IT.
270
00:11:23,300 --> 00:11:24,800
I'M JUST THINKING
IN PRACTICAL TERMS.
271
00:11:24,830 --> 00:11:26,270
DOWN THE ROAD,
JOB OPPORTUNITIES
272
00:11:26,300 --> 00:11:28,740
TEND TO DWINDLE FOR THOSE
IN THE MORE NAKED PROFESSIONS,
273
00:11:28,770 --> 00:11:29,870
IF YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT
I'M SAYING.
274
00:11:29,910 --> 00:11:31,740
- MM.
275
00:11:31,780 --> 00:11:32,910
- TWO EMPTY GLASSES, JACKIE,
THANK YOU.
276
00:11:32,940 --> 00:11:34,040
- MM-HMM.
- I'M GOING TO OFFER OUR, UH,
277
00:11:34,080 --> 00:11:37,310
VISITING SCHOLAR FROM AMHERST
SOME OF MY '82 LA TOUR.
278
00:11:37,350 --> 00:11:38,350
- OOH.
- HEY.
279
00:11:38,380 --> 00:11:39,280
THAT'S NOT COOL,
DEAN KOONS.
280
00:11:39,320 --> 00:11:41,790
SEGREGATING YOUR GUESTS
INTO TWO CLASSES,
281
00:11:41,820 --> 00:11:43,790
OFFERING YOUR GOOD STUFF
ONLY TO A SELECT FEW.
282
00:11:43,820 --> 00:11:45,820
- WELL, WHEN YOU GET
YOUR GUGGENHEIM,
283
00:11:45,860 --> 00:11:47,220
WE CAN TALK ABOUT THAT.
- OH.
284
00:11:47,260 --> 00:11:48,930
- IN THE MEANTIME,
YOU ENJOY THAT GLASS
285
00:11:48,960 --> 00:11:50,930
OF VERY MIDDLING CAB.
286
00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:53,230
- ASSHOLE.
287
00:11:53,260 --> 00:11:56,470
[growling]
288
00:11:56,500 --> 00:11:58,070
[making explosion sounds]
289
00:11:58,100 --> 00:11:59,900
- THERE YOU ARE.
- OH.
290
00:11:59,940 --> 00:12:02,240
- I SEE YOU FOUND THE TOYS
IN THE ATTIC.
291
00:12:02,270 --> 00:12:04,810
- AH. WHAT, ARE YOU RUNNING
A MUSEUM HERE ON THE SIDE
292
00:12:04,840 --> 00:12:06,010
OR SOMETHING?
293
00:12:06,040 --> 00:12:07,210
- OH, IT'S JUST
HIS LITTLE HOBBY.
294
00:12:07,240 --> 00:12:08,910
BORES THE SHIT OUT OF ME,
ACTUALLY.
295
00:12:08,950 --> 00:12:11,050
I'M QUITE RELIEVED
TO CATCH YOU HERE ALONE.
296
00:12:11,080 --> 00:12:13,080
- YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT
THE SNOOPING?
297
00:12:13,120 --> 00:12:14,950
- SNOOP ALL YOU WANT.
298
00:12:14,980 --> 00:12:17,320
MY LIFE'S AN OPEN BOOK.
SADLY.
299
00:12:17,350 --> 00:12:20,190
BESIDES, BECCA MUST HAVE
TOLD YOU ALL ABOUT US BY NOW.
300
00:12:20,220 --> 00:12:22,130
- NO, SHE'S NOT MUCH ONE
FOR CHATTING.
301
00:12:22,160 --> 00:12:23,390
TEXTING, YES.
302
00:12:23,430 --> 00:12:25,130
TWITTERING, TWEETERING,
TWATTING,
303
00:12:25,160 --> 00:12:27,100
STARING SOLEMNLY
AT THE OLD MAN.
304
00:12:27,130 --> 00:12:28,360
- OH, PLEASE.
305
00:12:28,400 --> 00:12:30,230
YOU FATHERS HAVE IT EASY.
306
00:12:30,270 --> 00:12:32,840
MOST DAYS, I CAN BARELY GET
A CIVIL WORD OUT OF CHELSEA.
307
00:12:32,870 --> 00:12:34,840
AT LEAST BECCA STILL
TALKS ABOUT YOU
308
00:12:34,870 --> 00:12:36,570
WITH SOME SORT OF
TWISTED AFFECTION.
309
00:12:36,610 --> 00:12:39,810
- RE-BECCA? MY BECCA?
THAT DOESN'T SOUND LIKE HER.
310
00:12:39,840 --> 00:12:41,110
- NO, IT'S TRUE.
311
00:12:41,140 --> 00:12:42,210
WE HAD AN INTERESTING DISCUSSION
THE OTHER DAY
312
00:12:42,250 --> 00:12:44,910
ABOUT THE MORE SCATOLOGICAL
ELEMENTS IN YOUR WORK.
313
00:12:44,950 --> 00:12:46,180
AND SHE KNOWS QUITE A LOT
ABOUT RABELAIS.
314
00:12:46,220 --> 00:12:47,850
- YES, THAT'S ME.
I TAUGHT HER THAT SHIT.
315
00:12:47,880 --> 00:12:49,220
- YEAH, I FIGURED,
316
00:12:49,250 --> 00:12:50,490
WHEN SHE TOLD ME
ALL ABOUT
317
00:12:50,520 --> 00:12:51,920
HOW YOU GOT YOUR START
IN NEW YORK
318
00:12:51,960 --> 00:12:53,890
AND HOW YOU MET HER MOTHER.
- NO SHIT.
319
00:12:53,920 --> 00:12:55,990
- YEAH, I MEAN, SHE SEEMS
A LITTLE CONFUSED
320
00:12:56,030 --> 00:12:57,230
ABOUT THE ISSUE OF WHETHER
321
00:12:57,260 --> 00:12:59,200
YOU TWO ARE STILL TOGETHER
OR NOT.
322
00:12:59,230 --> 00:13:01,100
- [exhales]
AREN'T WE ALL.
323
00:13:01,130 --> 00:13:04,070
- OH, WELL,
THAT'S A SHAME.
324
00:13:04,100 --> 00:13:05,470
GOSH, I'D LOVE
TO FIX YOU UP SOMETIME.
325
00:13:05,500 --> 00:13:08,440
- UH, I APPRECIATE THAT,
BUT THAT'S A FOOL'S ERRAND.
326
00:13:08,470 --> 00:13:10,340
- OH, REALLY?
WHY IS THAT?
327
00:13:10,370 --> 00:13:12,140
- WELL, IT'S MY PURGATORY,
REALLY.
328
00:13:12,180 --> 00:13:14,180
DINNER, DRINKS, WHATEVER.
329
00:13:14,210 --> 00:13:15,410
NEVER REALLY
ALL THAT INTERESTED,
330
00:13:15,440 --> 00:13:18,110
BUT I FIND MYSELF TELLING HER
HOW BEAUTIFUL SHE IS ANYWAY.
331
00:13:18,150 --> 00:13:19,950
'CAUSE IT'S TRUE.
332
00:13:19,980 --> 00:13:21,520
ALL WOMEN ARE,
IN ONE WAY OR ANOTHER.
333
00:13:21,550 --> 00:13:23,590
YOU KNOW, THERE'S ALWAYS
SOMETHING ABOUT
334
00:13:23,620 --> 00:13:25,320
EVERY DAMN ONE OF YOU.
335
00:13:25,350 --> 00:13:28,490
THERE'S A SMILE,
A CURVE, A SECRET.
336
00:13:28,520 --> 00:13:31,090
YOU LADIES REALLY ARE
THE MOST AMAZING CREATURES.
337
00:13:31,130 --> 00:13:33,960
MY LIFE'S WORK.
338
00:13:34,000 --> 00:13:35,600
BUT THEN THERE'S
THE MORNING AFTER.
339
00:13:35,630 --> 00:13:37,100
THE HANGOVER,
340
00:13:37,130 --> 00:13:38,970
AND THE REALIZATION THAT
I'M NOT QUITE AS AVAILABLE
341
00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:40,270
AS I THOUGHT I WAS
THE NIGHT BEFORE.
342
00:13:40,300 --> 00:13:43,110
AND THEN SHE'S GONE.
343
00:13:43,140 --> 00:13:45,270
AND I'M HAUNTED BY
YET ANOTHER ROAD NOT TAKEN.
344
00:13:45,310 --> 00:13:48,610
- WOW.
345
00:13:48,640 --> 00:13:50,050
I'M IMPRESSED.
346
00:13:50,080 --> 00:13:52,120
YOU ACTUALLY DROPPED THE ACT
FOR A MOMENT
347
00:13:52,150 --> 00:13:53,350
AND SAID SOMETHING REAL.
348
00:13:53,380 --> 00:13:54,550
- YES, I DO THAT SOMETIMES.
349
00:13:54,580 --> 00:13:55,580
BUT YOU NEVER KNOW
WHEN IT'S COMING.
350
00:13:55,620 --> 00:13:56,750
YOU GOTTA STAY ON YOUR TOES.
351
00:13:56,790 --> 00:13:59,290
I'M LIKE A BOXER THAT BOBS
AND WEAVES LIKE MUHAMMAD ALI
352
00:13:59,320 --> 00:14:00,620
OR JOE FRAZIER
OR SUGAR RAY LEONARD.
353
00:14:00,660 --> 00:14:04,030
BASICALLY, I'M JUST LISTING
BOXERS YOU MIGHT HAVE--
354
00:14:06,530 --> 00:14:09,100
- OOPS.
355
00:14:09,130 --> 00:14:11,500
I'M SORRY.
356
00:14:11,530 --> 00:14:14,600
- THE PARTY'S DOWNSTAIRS,
ISN'T IT?
357
00:14:17,570 --> 00:14:19,380
- WOW.
- WOW.
358
00:14:19,410 --> 00:14:22,050
- I THINK YOU MIGHT BE
SELLING YOURSELF A LITTLE SHORT.
359
00:14:22,080 --> 00:14:25,010
WITH JUST THE TINIEST BIT
OF EFFORT,
360
00:14:25,050 --> 00:14:28,250
YOU COULD'VE HAD SOMEONE
MUCH YOUNGER
361
00:14:28,280 --> 00:14:30,250
AND MUCH HOTTER.
362
00:14:30,290 --> 00:14:33,560
BUT BETTER LUCK NEXT TIME,
TEACH.
363
00:14:36,030 --> 00:14:39,000
[piano quartet plays]
364
00:14:39,030 --> 00:14:43,000
*
365
00:14:43,030 --> 00:14:45,500
- WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU?
YOU LOOK FLUSHED.
366
00:14:45,530 --> 00:14:47,000
- WELL, MY VIRTUE
WAS JUST ASSAILED.
367
00:14:47,040 --> 00:14:50,170
IN A NOT ENTIRELY
UNPLEASANT MANNER, BUT STILL.
368
00:14:50,210 --> 00:14:52,110
LEAVING SO SOON?
369
00:14:52,140 --> 00:14:53,240
- YEAH.
370
00:14:53,280 --> 00:14:55,610
GIRL CAN ONLY TAKE SO MUCH
HUMILIATION IN ONE NIGHT.
371
00:14:55,640 --> 00:14:57,980
- OH, THE GENTLEMAN CALLER
NEVER CALLED, HUH?
372
00:14:58,010 --> 00:15:00,420
- NO, HE NEVER CALLED.
AND HE NEVER TEXTED.
373
00:15:00,450 --> 00:15:02,350
AND HE MADE AN ACTUAL PLAN
TO MEET ME HERE.
374
00:15:02,390 --> 00:15:04,120
AND, YOU KNOW,
HE SEEMED REALLY INTO IT
375
00:15:04,150 --> 00:15:05,350
ON THE FIRST TWO DATES.
376
00:15:05,390 --> 00:15:07,220
AND THEN,
HE JUST NEVER SHOWED.
377
00:15:07,260 --> 00:15:09,590
WHAT--GO AHEAD AND EXPLAIN THAT
TO ME, WOULD YOU?
378
00:15:09,630 --> 00:15:11,190
TAKE A SHOT,
YOU SAID YOU WOULD EXPLAIN IT
379
00:15:11,230 --> 00:15:13,230
AND, AND WHY?
380
00:15:13,260 --> 00:15:14,630
IT'S, LIKE, SO HARD TO MAKE
A PHONE CALL?
381
00:15:14,660 --> 00:15:15,970
- YOU SEEM TO FORGET THAT
382
00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:19,400
I'M NOT THE MAN
WHO STOOD YOU UP.
383
00:15:19,440 --> 00:15:22,610
AH, HERE'S WHERE HE KEEPS
THE GOOD STUFF.
384
00:15:22,640 --> 00:15:24,010
- ME!
385
00:15:24,040 --> 00:15:25,980
WE WERE TALKING ABOUT ME HERE.
386
00:15:26,010 --> 00:15:26,910
- OKAY.
387
00:15:26,940 --> 00:15:29,310
I'M GONNA SAY THIS ONCE
AND ONE TIME ONLY,
388
00:15:29,350 --> 00:15:31,510
SO LISTEN CLOSELY, OKAY?
389
00:15:31,550 --> 00:15:33,750
FUCK THE FIREMAN.
390
00:15:33,780 --> 00:15:35,480
- IF I RECALL,
THAT WAS THE SAME ADVICE
391
00:15:35,520 --> 00:15:36,620
YOU GAVE ME EARLIER
IN THE EVENING.
392
00:15:36,650 --> 00:15:38,150
- TOTALLY DIFFERENT CONTEXT.
393
00:15:38,190 --> 00:15:40,690
- SO THAT'S IT.
JUST FUCK HIM.
394
00:15:40,720 --> 00:15:41,690
THAT'S ALL YOU GOT.
395
00:15:41,720 --> 00:15:43,990
I--I GOTTA BE TOTALLY
LAID BACK ABOUT THIS.
396
00:15:44,030 --> 00:15:45,290
I'M NOT EVEN ALLOWED
TO BE PISSED OFF.
397
00:15:45,330 --> 00:15:46,600
- NO, YOU GET TO BE,
YOU GET TO BE PISSED OFF.
398
00:15:46,630 --> 00:15:48,630
BUT, UH, YOU KNOW,
399
00:15:48,660 --> 00:15:51,100
MAYBE IF YOU JUST RELAXED
FOR--WHOA--
400
00:15:51,130 --> 00:15:53,500
HALF A SECOND,
AND STOPPED LOOKING SO HARD
401
00:15:53,540 --> 00:15:54,500
FOR THE APPROPRIATE LIFE MATE,
402
00:15:54,540 --> 00:15:57,370
THEN YOU MIGHT WAKE UP
ONE MORNING NEXT TO ONE.
403
00:15:57,410 --> 00:16:00,210
- RIGHT.
'CAUSE IT'S JUST THAT EASY.
404
00:16:00,240 --> 00:16:01,240
- I DIDN'T SAY IT WAS EASY,
405
00:16:01,280 --> 00:16:02,750
BUT YOU'VE GOT A SERIOUS GAM
UP IN THE MATTER.
406
00:16:02,780 --> 00:16:06,350
- OH, YEAH.
HOW, HOW SO?
407
00:16:06,380 --> 00:16:09,190
- 'CAUSE YOU'RE SCARY SMART
AND YOU'RE CRAZY BEAUTIFUL.
408
00:16:09,220 --> 00:16:11,420
YOU'RE ALSO INCREDIBLY SEXUAL.
409
00:16:11,450 --> 00:16:14,120
SO THERE.
410
00:16:14,160 --> 00:16:15,790
- WHAT THE FUCK
ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
411
00:16:15,820 --> 00:16:17,260
I'M A TOTAL NERD.
412
00:16:17,290 --> 00:16:18,730
- TRUE THAT,
BUT YOU'RE A SEXY NERD.
413
00:16:18,760 --> 00:16:20,630
YOU KNOW, SOME WOMEN,
THEY JUST SHUT OFF
414
00:16:20,660 --> 00:16:22,670
THAT PART OF THEMSELVES
AND THEY EXPECT PRINCE CHARMING
415
00:16:22,700 --> 00:16:25,070
TO COME ALONG AND PRY OPEN
THEIR DUSTY OLD BEAVERS
416
00:16:25,100 --> 00:16:26,700
WITH THE JAWS OF LIFE,
OR SOME SHIT LIKE THAT.
417
00:16:26,740 --> 00:16:28,440
NOT YOU.
YOU'RE A GOOD TIMER.
418
00:16:28,470 --> 00:16:29,810
- [laughs]
- YEP.
419
00:16:29,840 --> 00:16:31,070
- MM-HMM.
420
00:16:31,110 --> 00:16:34,680
AND YOU'RE JUST
SAYING THIS, RIGHT?
421
00:16:34,710 --> 00:16:37,780
- WHICH--
WHAT, WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
422
00:16:37,810 --> 00:16:40,050
- WELL, YOU'RE SAYING
ALL THIS INCREDIBLY WEIRD
423
00:16:40,080 --> 00:16:42,550
BUT INCREDIBLY SWEET STUFF
ABOUT ME AND--
424
00:16:42,590 --> 00:16:43,750
- AH.
425
00:16:43,790 --> 00:16:45,120
- BUT THAT'S WHAT YOU DO,
RIGHT?
426
00:16:45,150 --> 00:16:46,320
THAT'S WHAT YOU DO
IN THE SITUATION WHEN
427
00:16:46,360 --> 00:16:47,660
YOU'RE TRYING TO MAKE ME
FEEL BETTER.
428
00:16:47,690 --> 00:16:51,130
- MM. YEAH.
WHICH IS BAD, WHY?
429
00:16:51,160 --> 00:16:52,600
- IT'S NOT NECESSARILY
A BAD THING.
430
00:16:52,630 --> 00:16:54,760
I JUST WONDER
IF YOU MEAN ANYTHING
431
00:16:54,800 --> 00:16:56,370
THAT'S COMING OUT
OF YOUR MOUTH.
432
00:16:56,400 --> 00:16:57,500
- I DON'T JUST SAY SHIT.
433
00:16:57,530 --> 00:16:59,300
I MEAN,
I DO TALK A LOT OF SHIT,
434
00:16:59,340 --> 00:17:03,610
BUT I GENERALLY MEAN WHAT I SAY
AND I SAY WHAT I MEAN.
435
00:17:03,640 --> 00:17:05,410
- MM-HMM.
436
00:17:05,440 --> 00:17:09,280
SO YOU SEE ME
AS A VIABLE CANDIDATE?
437
00:17:09,310 --> 00:17:10,680
- DEPENDS ON WHAT
YOU'RE RUNNING FOR.
438
00:17:10,710 --> 00:17:14,250
- DICK, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.
439
00:17:14,280 --> 00:17:16,620
- LOOK, IF--IF MY LOVE LIFE
WEREN'T AS COMPLICATED
440
00:17:16,650 --> 00:17:19,360
AS SOMETHING THAT IS...
441
00:17:19,390 --> 00:17:21,260
REALLY COMPLICATED
THAT I CAN'T THINK OF RIGHT NOW,
442
00:17:21,290 --> 00:17:23,460
I WOULD TOTALLY CHECK YOUR TEETH
AND TAKE YOU OUT FOR A RIDE.
443
00:17:23,490 --> 00:17:26,330
- GOD, I HATE YOU!
444
00:17:26,360 --> 00:17:29,730
- WHAT, YOU'RE A STRANGE BIRD.
WHY ARE YOU HATING ON ME?
445
00:17:29,770 --> 00:17:32,200
- 'CAUSE I REALLY THOUGHT YOU
WERE GONNA KISS ME JUST THEN.
446
00:17:32,240 --> 00:17:35,540
OH. THAT IS WEIRD.
THAT IS VERY WEIRD.
447
00:17:35,570 --> 00:17:36,540
- WHY?
448
00:17:36,570 --> 00:17:38,740
- 'CAUSE I WAS THINKING
THE EXACT SAME THING.
449
00:17:38,770 --> 00:17:40,680
- REALLY?
- WELL, NOT EXACTLY.
450
00:17:40,710 --> 00:17:41,580
I WAS THINKING ABOUT
WHAT IT MIGHT BE LIKE
451
00:17:41,610 --> 00:17:43,680
TO GO DOWN ON YOU
FOR THE FIRST TIME.
452
00:17:43,710 --> 00:17:44,810
IT'S KIND OF THE SAME THING,
ISN'T IT?
453
00:17:44,850 --> 00:17:47,280
- YOU'RE SUCH AN ASSHOLE.
454
00:17:47,320 --> 00:17:48,420
- * BOYS ARE BOYS
455
00:17:48,450 --> 00:17:51,350
* AND GIRLS ARE JOYS
456
00:17:51,390 --> 00:17:55,390
* TO YOU AND ME
THEY'RE MORE THAN TOYS *
457
00:17:55,420 --> 00:17:57,560
* GONNA FIND ONE,
SHE WON'T BE LONELY *
458
00:17:57,590 --> 00:17:59,800
* SHE'LL BE MINE,
MINE AND MINE ONLY *
459
00:17:59,830 --> 00:18:03,670
* AND WHEN I DO
IT WILL BE ALL RIGHT *
460
00:18:03,700 --> 00:18:04,870
* WEE-HOO
461
00:18:04,900 --> 00:18:08,670
- DO YOU FEEL IT YET?
462
00:18:08,700 --> 00:18:10,610
- NOPE.
463
00:18:10,640 --> 00:18:12,140
IS THAT NORMAL?
464
00:18:12,180 --> 00:18:13,480
- TOTALLY.
465
00:18:13,510 --> 00:18:15,680
MUSHROOMS TAKE A WHILE
TO HIT.
466
00:18:18,210 --> 00:18:21,650
WHAT'S THE CRAZIEST THING
YOU'VE EVER DONE?
467
00:18:21,680 --> 00:18:23,190
SEXUALLY.
468
00:18:23,220 --> 00:18:26,390
- LET'S PUT IT THIS WAY.
469
00:18:26,420 --> 00:18:27,820
MY FATHER WOULD BE THRILLED
470
00:18:27,860 --> 00:18:32,200
BY MY LACK OF EXPERIENCE
IN THE AREA.
471
00:18:32,230 --> 00:18:35,660
- WHAT ABOUT BLOW JOBS?
472
00:18:35,700 --> 00:18:37,670
- I TOUCHED ONE.
473
00:18:37,700 --> 00:18:39,300
KIND OF FREAKED ME OUT
HOW HARD IT GOT.
474
00:18:39,340 --> 00:18:40,640
- HMM.
475
00:18:40,670 --> 00:18:42,210
- YOU?
476
00:18:42,240 --> 00:18:44,710
- A BUNCH OF TIMES.
IT'S FUN.
477
00:18:44,740 --> 00:18:48,280
- WEREN'T YOU SCARED?
478
00:18:48,310 --> 00:18:50,280
- SURE. AT FIRST.
479
00:18:50,310 --> 00:18:51,950
BUT THEN YOU REALIZE
HOW MUCH POWER YOU HAVE
480
00:18:51,980 --> 00:18:54,550
OVER GUYS,
AND IT'S KIND OF EXCITING.
481
00:18:54,580 --> 00:18:57,790
- I'M SURE
I'D DO SOMETHING WRONG.
482
00:18:57,820 --> 00:18:59,590
- IT'S NOT LIKE
YOU'RE GONNA BREAK IT.
483
00:18:59,620 --> 00:19:02,430
I MEAN, AS LONG AS
YOU'RE CAREFUL WITH YOUR TEETH
484
00:19:02,460 --> 00:19:04,830
AND YOU REMEMBER
TO INCORPORATE THE BALLS,
485
00:19:04,860 --> 00:19:05,960
YOU CAN'T FUCK IT UP
TOO BAD.
486
00:19:05,990 --> 00:19:08,200
ASK ANY GUY,
HE'LL TELL YOU.
487
00:19:08,230 --> 00:19:10,700
- OKAY. GOOD TO KNOW.
488
00:19:10,730 --> 00:19:13,700
- DON'T WORRY.
WE'LL GET YOU LAID THIS YEAR.
489
00:19:13,740 --> 00:19:15,770
- NO RUSH.
490
00:19:15,800 --> 00:19:17,310
SOMETIMES I THINK
I'D BE HAPPY
491
00:19:17,340 --> 00:19:19,980
TO STAY A VIRGIN FOREVER.
492
00:19:20,010 --> 00:19:21,780
SEEMS LIKE
ONCE YOU GET LAID--
493
00:19:21,810 --> 00:19:24,950
- YOUR WHOLE LIFE
BASICALLY TURNS TO SHIT.
494
00:19:24,980 --> 00:19:26,820
I'VE HEARD THAT ONE BEFORE.
495
00:19:26,850 --> 00:19:28,250
COME ON, BECCA.
YOU'RE SLIPPING.
496
00:19:28,280 --> 00:19:29,820
I'VE DONE A LOT OF WORK
TO GET YOU OUT OF
497
00:19:29,850 --> 00:19:32,890
THAT GLOOMY FUCKIN' HEAD
OF YOURS.
498
00:19:32,920 --> 00:19:34,990
- THINK ABOUT IT.
499
00:19:35,020 --> 00:19:37,260
IF MY MOTHER AND FATHER
HADN'T BEEN SO QUICK
500
00:19:37,290 --> 00:19:40,730
TO FUCK EACH OTHER,
I WOULDN'T BE HERE RIGHT NOW.
501
00:19:40,760 --> 00:19:42,500
AND IF I WASN'T HERE
RIGHT NOW,
502
00:19:42,530 --> 00:19:43,930
I THINK THEY'D BE
A LOT HAPPIER.
503
00:19:43,970 --> 00:19:46,640
ESPECIALLY MY FATHER.
504
00:19:46,670 --> 00:19:47,970
- THAT'S REALLY SHITTY
505
00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:50,810
THAT HE MAKES YOU
FEEL THAT WAY, BECCA.
506
00:19:50,840 --> 00:19:55,740
- HE DOESN'T.
IT'S ME.
507
00:19:55,780 --> 00:19:57,780
[laughs]
508
00:19:57,810 --> 00:19:59,920
I JUST SEE THINGS.
509
00:19:59,950 --> 00:20:02,650
[laughs hysterically]
510
00:20:02,690 --> 00:20:04,450
IS THIS IT?
511
00:20:04,490 --> 00:20:05,720
[laughter continues]
- YEP.
512
00:20:05,750 --> 00:20:11,690
[both laughing]
513
00:20:11,730 --> 00:20:14,000
- OH, WOW.
514
00:20:14,030 --> 00:20:15,700
- I KNOW, RIGHT?
515
00:20:15,730 --> 00:20:17,400
- NO, NOT THAT.
- NO?
516
00:20:17,430 --> 00:20:19,670
- NO. I'M SUCH A SLUT.
517
00:20:19,700 --> 00:20:22,000
- IN THE BEST WAY POSSIBLE.
518
00:20:22,040 --> 00:20:24,610
- YOU'RE NOT, LIKE, GONNA LOSE
RESPECT FOR ME NOW, ARE YOU?
519
00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:27,680
- 8% AT THE MOST.
- [giggles]
520
00:20:27,710 --> 00:20:29,550
- HOLD ON.
JUST HEARD SOMEBODY.
521
00:20:29,580 --> 00:20:30,950
- SHIT.
522
00:20:30,980 --> 00:20:32,850
NO--AH!
- SHIT.
523
00:20:32,880 --> 00:20:35,680
GO, GO.
524
00:20:35,720 --> 00:20:38,450
- * WON'T YOU TREAT ME NICE
525
00:20:38,490 --> 00:20:42,960
* HEY, MY PEACH,
BLOW ON MY DICE *
526
00:20:42,990 --> 00:20:45,560
* GONNA SWING ON MY SWING
527
00:20:45,590 --> 00:20:46,630
AH.
528
00:20:46,660 --> 00:20:48,500
* DON'T YOU DARE
TREAT ME NICE *
529
00:20:48,530 --> 00:20:51,330
* 'CAUSE I'M A CHILD FOR YOU
530
00:20:51,370 --> 00:20:55,570
* BABY, I'M WILD FOR YOU
531
00:20:55,600 --> 00:20:56,610
* AND--
532
00:20:56,640 --> 00:20:59,610
[cell phone plays disco tune]
533
00:20:59,640 --> 00:21:03,980
*
534
00:21:04,010 --> 00:21:05,880
- OKAY, YOU CAUGHT ME.
- OH, JESUS!
535
00:21:05,910 --> 00:21:07,650
- WATCH THAT STUFF. HERE,
LET ME TAKE THAT OFF YOUR HANDS.
536
00:21:07,680 --> 00:21:09,620
[talking at once]
537
00:21:09,650 --> 00:21:11,720
- MOODY, FOR CHRIST'S SAKE.
DON'T HANDLE ME.
538
00:21:11,750 --> 00:21:13,660
PLEASE DON'T HANDLE ME.
539
00:21:13,690 --> 00:21:14,890
WHAT ARE YOU DOING
IN MY PRIVATE OFFICE?
540
00:21:14,920 --> 00:21:15,790
- CAME IN HERE
TO MAKE A PHONE CALL.
541
00:21:15,820 --> 00:21:17,990
- THAT WAS--
THAT WAS YOUR CELL PHONE?
542
00:21:18,030 --> 00:21:20,330
- YEAH.
I LIKE ME A '70s GROOVE.
543
00:21:20,360 --> 00:21:22,000
WHAT ABOUT THAT DITTY
YOU WERE SINGING
544
00:21:22,030 --> 00:21:23,330
WHEN YOU CAME IN HERE?
545
00:21:23,370 --> 00:21:25,830
MAY I INQUIRE ABOUT THAT?
546
00:21:25,870 --> 00:21:27,040
- THAT WAS AN OBSCURE CLASSIC.
547
00:21:27,070 --> 00:21:28,740
- WAS IT?
- YEAH, YEAH.
548
00:21:28,770 --> 00:21:31,570
- IS IT, UH, SOME DITTY
OF YOUR OWN INVENTION, PERHAPS?
549
00:21:31,610 --> 00:21:34,080
- NO, IT'S RIGHT OUT
OF THE GREAT AMERICAN SONGBOOK,
550
00:21:34,110 --> 00:21:35,210
FOR YOUR INFORMATION.
551
00:21:35,240 --> 00:21:36,280
IF YOU HAD A LITTLE MORE
CULTURE, YOU'D UNDERSTAND THAT.
552
00:21:36,310 --> 00:21:38,610
- MAYBE SOMETHING YOU
WOULD HAVE SUNG A CAPELLA
553
00:21:38,650 --> 00:21:40,420
WITH THE WHIFF N' POOFS?
554
00:21:40,450 --> 00:21:43,120
GAY MAN'S HEALTH CHOIR,
OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT?
555
00:21:43,150 --> 00:21:45,390
- HEY, YOU TWO.
PARTY'S IN THERE.
556
00:21:45,420 --> 00:21:46,890
- AH. YEAH.
557
00:21:46,920 --> 00:21:48,090
- YOU'RE NOT HAVING
ANY OF MY LOWLAND MALT.
558
00:21:48,120 --> 00:21:49,220
- I WOULDN'T DREAM OF IT
559
00:21:49,260 --> 00:21:51,360
BUT I WOULD LIKE SOME PRIVACY
TO MAKE A PHONE CALL.
560
00:21:51,390 --> 00:21:52,460
- NO.
- NO?
561
00:21:52,500 --> 00:21:54,500
- NO.
- WHAT DO YOU MEAN, NO?
562
00:21:54,530 --> 00:21:55,660
THAT'S NOT VERY POLITE.
563
00:21:55,700 --> 00:21:58,630
- WELL, MY HOUSE,
MY RULES.
564
00:22:02,410 --> 00:22:04,010
- WHAT'S GOTTEN INTO HIM?
565
00:22:04,040 --> 00:22:05,470
- IS THERE ANOTHER WAY
IN HERE?
566
00:22:05,510 --> 00:22:06,810
- WHY DO YOU WANT
MORE PRIVACY?
567
00:22:06,840 --> 00:22:08,740
- WELL, I JUST--
- LISTEN, HANK.
568
00:22:08,780 --> 00:22:11,680
ABOUT EARLIER, CAN WE JUST
FORGET WHAT HAPPENED?
569
00:22:11,710 --> 00:22:15,020
- OH, WELL, WE NEEDN'T
EVER SPEAK OF IT AGAIN.
570
00:22:15,050 --> 00:22:17,050
BUT ONE DOES NOT VERY EASILY
FORGET THE KISS
571
00:22:17,090 --> 00:22:18,850
OF A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN.
572
00:22:18,890 --> 00:22:21,020
THAT'S RIGHT. I SAID IT.
I MEANT IT.
573
00:22:21,060 --> 00:22:23,090
I'M HERE TO REPRESENT IT.
574
00:22:23,130 --> 00:22:27,130
I GOTTA RUN 'CAUSE THAT CHEESE
IS WORKING ON ME.
575
00:22:27,160 --> 00:22:30,930
[elevator dings]
576
00:22:33,100 --> 00:22:35,670
- AH.
577
00:22:35,700 --> 00:22:37,010
MM.
578
00:22:37,040 --> 00:22:39,880
[chuckles]
- OH, HI.
579
00:22:39,910 --> 00:22:42,480
I WAS LOOKING FOR CHARLIE.
580
00:22:42,510 --> 00:22:43,510
- HE'S GONE HOME FOR THE DAY.
581
00:22:43,550 --> 00:22:46,050
- OH. YOU MUST BE SUE.
582
00:22:46,080 --> 00:22:48,580
- YES. SUE COLLINI.
583
00:22:48,620 --> 00:22:50,620
- MARCY, THE EX.
584
00:22:50,650 --> 00:22:52,890
- AH.
- HE'S TOLD ME ALL ABOUT YOU.
585
00:22:52,920 --> 00:22:56,730
- OH.
586
00:22:56,760 --> 00:22:59,460
- OKAY, WELL,
IF YOU JUST TELL HIM
587
00:22:59,500 --> 00:23:00,660
THAT I WAS LOOKING FOR HIM,
588
00:23:00,700 --> 00:23:02,430
I WAS GONNA GIVE HIM
THIS BOTTLE OF--
589
00:23:02,470 --> 00:23:03,570
- [coughs]
590
00:23:03,600 --> 00:23:06,770
- [coughs]
591
00:23:06,800 --> 00:23:09,740
SMOKER'S COUGH.
LOVE THOSE MORE MENTHOLS.
592
00:23:09,770 --> 00:23:13,640
- CHARLIE.
593
00:23:13,680 --> 00:23:15,010
CHARLIE RUNKLE.
594
00:23:15,040 --> 00:23:16,680
- YES.
595
00:23:16,710 --> 00:23:17,850
- ARE YOU INSIDE THAT WOMAN?
596
00:23:17,880 --> 00:23:19,110
- I CAN EXPLAIN.
597
00:23:19,150 --> 00:23:21,550
- OH, JESUS CHRIST.
- MARCY.
598
00:23:21,580 --> 00:23:23,190
- MARCY, IT--
599
00:23:23,220 --> 00:23:25,720
- IT WAS NICE TO MEET YOU,
SUE.
600
00:23:25,750 --> 00:23:28,560
- MARCY, MARCY, DON'T GO.
MARCY.
601
00:23:28,590 --> 00:23:30,760
- OH, GOD, OKAY.
602
00:23:30,790 --> 00:23:34,500
LET'S JUST KEEP MY ASS
CLOSER TO THE GROUND, PLEASE.
603
00:23:34,530 --> 00:23:36,700
- THERE YOU GO.
- OKAY.
604
00:23:36,730 --> 00:23:40,140
REMIND ME TO NEVER
TAKE YOUR ADVICE AGAIN.
605
00:23:40,170 --> 00:23:42,040
- YOU'RE GONNA THANK ME WHEN
YOU'RE LIVING IN THE SUBURBS
606
00:23:42,070 --> 00:23:43,540
WITH THAT HOUSE
607
00:23:43,570 --> 00:23:45,870
WITH THE ATTACHED GARAGE
OF YOUR DREAMS.
608
00:23:45,910 --> 00:23:47,840
- [chuckles]
609
00:23:47,880 --> 00:23:49,240
- WOULD YOU LIKE A SMOKE?
610
00:23:49,280 --> 00:23:51,250
- NO, I'VE BROKEN
QUITE ENOUGH RULES
611
00:23:51,280 --> 00:23:53,520
FOR ONE NIGHT, THANK YOU.
612
00:23:53,550 --> 00:23:54,880
- SPEAKING OF WHICH, UH,
613
00:23:54,920 --> 00:23:58,490
PROBABLY WASN'T COOL OF ME
TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOU
614
00:23:58,520 --> 00:24:00,620
IN YOUR MOMENT OF WEAKNESS.
615
00:24:00,660 --> 00:24:01,520
- NO, IT WASN'T.
616
00:24:01,560 --> 00:24:04,490
BUT IN FAIRNESS, UH,
ALL OF MY MOMENTS
617
00:24:04,530 --> 00:24:05,990
ARE MOMENTS OF WEAKNESS NOW.
618
00:24:06,030 --> 00:24:07,260
- MM.
619
00:24:07,300 --> 00:24:11,930
- SO WHAT'S THE MATTER
WITH ME ANYWAY?
620
00:24:11,970 --> 00:24:14,140
- WELL, NOW THAT I'VE HAD
AN UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL VIEW,
621
00:24:14,170 --> 00:24:17,940
I WOULD HAVE
TO SAY NOTHING.
622
00:24:17,970 --> 00:24:19,270
- OH, COME ON,
THAT OLD CHESTNUT?
623
00:24:19,310 --> 00:24:20,840
- MM?
624
00:24:20,880 --> 00:24:23,950
- IT'S NOT ME, I JUST HAVEN'T
FOUND THE RIGHT GUY?
625
00:24:23,980 --> 00:24:25,780
OH, MY GOD.
- WHAT?
626
00:24:25,810 --> 00:24:27,750
- SHIT, HE'S HERE.
- HIM WHO?
627
00:24:27,780 --> 00:24:28,820
- THE FIRE DUDE.
628
00:24:28,850 --> 00:24:31,150
- WOW, THE BALLS ON THAT GUY,
THREE HOURS LATE.
629
00:24:31,190 --> 00:24:33,160
THEN AGAIN, YOU JUST HAD
ANOTHER DUDE INSIDE YOU
630
00:24:33,190 --> 00:24:34,520
TEN MINUTES AGO.
631
00:24:34,560 --> 00:24:36,220
- JILL.
- HEY, ROSS.
632
00:24:36,260 --> 00:24:38,860
- HEY.
- YOU MADE IT.
633
00:24:38,890 --> 00:24:40,630
- YEAH, YOU MUST REALLY
HATE ME RIGHT NOW.
634
00:24:40,660 --> 00:24:42,260
- SHE DOES.
635
00:24:42,300 --> 00:24:45,530
- UM, YEAH.
THAT'S NOT A LIE.
636
00:24:45,570 --> 00:24:47,040
I, UM--
[clears throat]
637
00:24:47,070 --> 00:24:48,170
THIS IS--
638
00:24:48,200 --> 00:24:51,310
- UH, THIS IS DR. HENRY MOODY.
I'M HER THESIS ADVISOR.
639
00:24:51,340 --> 00:24:52,810
IT'S NICE TO MEET YOU.
640
00:24:52,840 --> 00:24:54,240
I WAS BEGINNING TO THINK
THAT JILL MADE YOU UP,
641
00:24:54,280 --> 00:24:56,310
THAT YOU WERE A FIGMENT
OF HER IMAGINATION.
642
00:24:56,340 --> 00:24:58,710
- WELL, I'M HOPING
YOU'LL GIVE ME A CHANCE
643
00:24:58,750 --> 00:25:00,980
TO EXPLAIN, YOU KNOW,
UNLESS I'M TOO LATE.
644
00:25:01,020 --> 00:25:03,820
MAYBE I'VE--
MAYBE I MISSED MY CHANCE.
645
00:25:03,850 --> 00:25:05,290
- WELL, NORMALLY
SHE'S A REAL STICKLER
646
00:25:05,320 --> 00:25:06,890
FOR VERITIES
AND BALDERDASH,
647
00:25:06,920 --> 00:25:08,660
BUT IF YOU WERE OUT
SAVING LIVES,
648
00:25:08,690 --> 00:25:10,160
I THINK AN EXCEPTION
CAN BE MADE
649
00:25:10,190 --> 00:25:12,960
FOR A REAL LIFE FIRE DUDE.
DON'T YOU THINK?
650
00:25:13,000 --> 00:25:15,030
WHAT WERE YOU JUST SAYING,
YOU WANT ANOTHER FUCKING DRINK?
651
00:25:15,060 --> 00:25:16,970
- YES.
- JUST NOW. YOU WERE, RIGHT?
652
00:25:17,000 --> 00:25:19,900
- I WAS.
I--I NEED ANOTHER FUCKING DRINK.
653
00:25:19,940 --> 00:25:22,040
- YEAH.
AND SPRING FOR THE GOOD STUFF.
654
00:25:22,070 --> 00:25:24,310
GET THE TOP SHELF.
DON'T BE CHEAP.
655
00:25:24,340 --> 00:25:25,910
- SEE YOU IN CLASS,
PROFESSOR.
656
00:25:25,940 --> 00:25:28,710
- MM-HMM.
657
00:25:28,740 --> 00:25:30,050
- [giggling]
658
00:25:30,080 --> 00:25:31,180
THERE'S MY DAD.
659
00:25:31,210 --> 00:25:33,780
- HEY.
WHAT HAVE YOU TWO BEEN UP TO?
660
00:25:33,820 --> 00:25:35,320
LATE NIGHT SWIM,
MIDNIGHT TENNIS MATCH?
661
00:25:35,350 --> 00:25:39,020
- WE, UM, JUST WALKED DOWN
TO CAMPUS TO GET SOME PIZZA.
662
00:25:39,050 --> 00:25:41,120
- PIZZA?
663
00:25:41,160 --> 00:25:44,990
- YES, PIZZA.
- HMM.
664
00:25:45,030 --> 00:25:46,900
COME CLOSER.
- WHY?
665
00:25:46,930 --> 00:25:49,900
- I WANT TO SMELL YOU.
666
00:25:49,930 --> 00:25:55,300
[sniffing]
667
00:25:55,340 --> 00:25:58,010
YOU SMELL LIKE PIZZA.
668
00:25:58,040 --> 00:26:00,780
- BE CAREFUL,
DON'T GET TOO CLOSE.
669
00:26:00,810 --> 00:26:02,280
I FEEL A BURP COMING ON.
670
00:26:02,310 --> 00:26:05,080
- YOU WOULDN'T.
- I WOULD.
671
00:26:05,110 --> 00:26:08,250
AND REMEMBER, SOMETIMES BURPS
SMELL WORSE THAN FARTS.
672
00:26:08,280 --> 00:26:09,720
- IS THAT A THREAT?
673
00:26:09,750 --> 00:26:11,220
- YOU GUYS ARE SO GROSS.
674
00:26:11,250 --> 00:26:13,020
- WHAT, THERE'S NO BODILY
FUNCTIONS AT THE DEANERY?
675
00:26:13,060 --> 00:26:14,360
JUST CATERED AFFAIRS?
676
00:26:14,390 --> 00:26:16,960
- [laughs]
677
00:26:16,990 --> 00:26:20,200
HEY, DAD, DON'T PICK ME UP
TILL NOON TOMORROW, OKAY?
678
00:26:20,230 --> 00:26:21,900
- OKAY, SWEETIE.
679
00:26:21,930 --> 00:26:26,740
- [laughs]
680
00:26:26,770 --> 00:26:30,110
- VERY CHEERFUL.
VERY CHEERFUL.
681
00:26:31,340 --> 00:26:32,740
- * SHADOWS ARE FALLING
682
00:26:32,780 --> 00:26:36,910
- ONE NIGHT, FELIX.
THAT'S IT. ALL RIGHT?
683
00:26:36,950 --> 00:26:38,910
- UNDERSTOOD.
684
00:26:38,950 --> 00:26:40,180
- I JUST,
I CAN'T GO BACK THERE TONIGHT.
685
00:26:40,220 --> 00:26:43,120
I CAN'T FACE HER.
NOT AFTER THIS HUMILIATION.
686
00:26:43,150 --> 00:26:44,820
- REMIND ME AGAIN
HOW THIS HUMILIATION
687
00:26:44,850 --> 00:26:46,920
IS DIFFERENT
FROM ALL THE OTHERS.
688
00:26:46,960 --> 00:26:49,660
I'M GONNA NEED SOME EGGS
BENEDICT TOMORROW, BLUE MAN.
689
00:26:49,690 --> 00:26:50,490
- THAT I CAN DO.
690
00:26:50,530 --> 00:26:52,730
WHAT I CANNOT DO
IS RESIST THE ALLURE
691
00:26:52,760 --> 00:26:54,700
OF A POWERFUL WOMAN.
692
00:26:54,730 --> 00:26:57,830
- SO WE'RE 100% SURE
SHE'S 100% WOMAN, RIGHT?
693
00:26:57,870 --> 00:27:01,000
THE BALLS OF STEEL THING
IS JUST METAPHORICAL?
694
00:27:01,040 --> 00:27:04,440
- YOU KNOW
WHAT DID THE TRICK, HANK?
695
00:27:04,470 --> 00:27:07,140
WHAT SET ME OVER THE EDGE
AFTER WEEKS OF RESISTING,
696
00:27:07,180 --> 00:27:09,710
ONE TINY LITTLE COMPLIMENT
ABOUT MY AGENTING.
697
00:27:09,750 --> 00:27:11,110
THAT'S IT.
698
00:27:11,150 --> 00:27:12,310
THAT'S ALL IT TAKES
TO MAKE A MAN COME ACROSS.
699
00:27:12,350 --> 00:27:14,780
WE ARE NOT
COMPLICATED CREATURES.
700
00:27:14,820 --> 00:27:16,380
- DON'T BE SO HARD
ON YOURSELF.
701
00:27:16,420 --> 00:27:19,290
YOU WERE SEXUALLY
HARASSED TONIGHT.
702
00:27:19,320 --> 00:27:21,220
AS WAS I.
703
00:27:21,260 --> 00:27:24,060
NO MAN CAN WITHSTAND
THAT KIND OF PRESSURE.
704
00:27:24,090 --> 00:27:25,190
- YEAH, BUT DO YOU KNOW
WHERE I'D BE
705
00:27:25,230 --> 00:27:26,390
IF I'D BEEN JUST
A TINY BIT STRONGER?
706
00:27:26,430 --> 00:27:29,200
BACK IN THE PROMISED LAND.
707
00:27:29,230 --> 00:27:30,300
THE WHOLE PACKAGE, MAN.
708
00:27:30,330 --> 00:27:32,200
MY OWN HOUSE,
MY OWN BED,
709
00:27:32,230 --> 00:27:35,700
MY OWN WIFE.
710
00:27:35,740 --> 00:27:38,470
- NEXT YEAR,
MY HEBREW FRIEND.
711
00:27:38,510 --> 00:27:40,910
NEXT YEAR IN JERUSALEM.
712
00:27:40,940 --> 00:27:44,350
- * IT'S NOT DARK YET
713
00:27:44,380 --> 00:27:45,980
* BUT IT'S GETTING THERE
714
00:27:46,010 --> 00:27:53,990
*
715
00:28:09,340 --> 00:28:12,270
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