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1
00:02:44,279 --> 00:02:46,113
Hello?
2
00:02:53,738 --> 00:02:55,196
Hello!
3
00:03:40,780 --> 00:03:46,363
How many times did I have to defend my needs,
the ones I neglected all those years.
4
00:03:50,113 --> 00:03:52,071
First to myself...
5
00:03:52,279 --> 00:03:55,738
...because I thought that no one
could deal with it.
6
00:04:01,405 --> 00:04:07,571
I had gotten used to his vanilla sex and
assumed it was the standard way.
7
00:04:09,113 --> 00:04:11,405
I thought something was wrong with me...
8
00:04:12,363 --> 00:04:16,279
...because I was into other things
than other people.
9
00:04:34,988 --> 00:04:38,904
I can get ready and make plans...
10
00:04:39,446 --> 00:04:43,363
...while nobody is looking
or asking me why.
11
00:04:59,613 --> 00:05:05,154
If I don't give in to my urges
things will just get worse for me.
12
00:05:06,488 --> 00:05:09,405
It will all get more confusing.
13
00:05:49,321 --> 00:05:52,904
I remember the first time
I was invited to a party...
14
00:05:57,196 --> 00:06:01,946
It took more time to think up an alibi to
get out of the house then the party itself.
15
00:06:14,696 --> 00:06:18,155
The scent of my perfume he knows so well...
16
00:06:20,779 --> 00:06:23,904
Not for him and he wasn't supposed to know.
17
00:06:26,946 --> 00:06:29,196
I lied like a rug.
18
00:06:30,405 --> 00:06:32,821
That night I was soaring.
19
00:06:35,029 --> 00:06:41,196
I felt such overpowering love for
the orgy and all the men who wanted me...
20
00:06:44,280 --> 00:06:46,196
It brought tears to my eyes.
21
00:06:49,196 --> 00:06:54,530
One man even whispered to me:
If you want to go, just go.
22
00:06:54,904 --> 00:06:57,654
And he promised to take me home
like a gentleman.
23
00:06:57,863 --> 00:07:00,612
Sweet, but unnecessary.
24
00:07:02,155 --> 00:07:04,904
For days I wanted to cry and fuck.
25
00:07:06,654 --> 00:07:10,488
I think I'm good at crying and fucking.
26
00:07:11,238 --> 00:07:14,363
In lying and having a double life.
27
00:07:18,071 --> 00:07:21,447
And if you ask me if I want to stop...
28
00:07:23,488 --> 00:07:25,363
Well, no.
29
00:07:35,155 --> 00:07:36,363
Hello!
30
00:08:14,363 --> 00:08:16,779
Let me out!
31
00:10:20,529 --> 00:10:22,322
What time is it?
32
00:10:23,280 --> 00:10:24,654
Still early.
33
00:10:35,322 --> 00:10:38,654
What are you doing?
- Come on.
34
00:10:40,404 --> 00:10:41,696
A quicky.
35
00:10:43,071 --> 00:10:44,779
I have to shave.
36
00:10:48,363 --> 00:10:50,071
Another time okay?
37
00:10:59,238 --> 00:11:02,404
Why do you always pick such weird moments?
38
00:11:33,571 --> 00:11:36,362
I hope I'm getting a copy of this?
39
00:12:53,946 --> 00:12:55,404
Hi Gaya.
40
00:12:56,780 --> 00:12:58,571
No it's fine.
41
00:13:00,946 --> 00:13:02,613
Now?
42
00:13:04,362 --> 00:13:06,738
In the teachers' lounge he sits near me.
43
00:13:08,071 --> 00:13:10,821
He always has coffee with cream...
and a cheese sandwich.
44
00:13:12,279 --> 00:13:13,905
He's a math teacher.
45
00:13:13,946 --> 00:13:16,988
He has such lovely eyes, so warm.
46
00:13:17,362 --> 00:13:19,613
And obviously a big slide rule.
47
00:13:20,571 --> 00:13:22,072
Jeez, Stella.
48
00:13:22,155 --> 00:13:25,821
Heck, just go sit across from him
next time.
49
00:13:26,197 --> 00:13:28,696
Is he married?
- How would I know?
50
00:13:33,946 --> 00:13:37,113
Am I the only one here who gets a bit
tired of all this adulterous behavior?
51
00:13:38,529 --> 00:13:42,446
Jeez Lau. Let Quinty flirt a bit.
What difference does it make?
52
00:13:42,529 --> 00:13:43,780
I wasn't even flirting.
53
00:13:45,613 --> 00:13:48,738
Sweety... go ahead and enjoy it.
54
00:13:49,197 --> 00:13:51,696
What's wrong with a little attention?
55
00:13:58,321 --> 00:14:00,321
What choices are you planning to make?
56
00:14:02,196 --> 00:14:04,988
Choices, that's when you lose
friends and family.
57
00:14:06,863 --> 00:14:09,404
Yes, I understand what you mean,
but put that aside for now.
58
00:14:11,237 --> 00:14:14,321
Well, I would like...
59
00:14:15,529 --> 00:14:19,905
...to be liked. I want to be able to
share without being attached.
60
00:14:45,072 --> 00:14:47,780
Let me out of here!
61
00:15:08,321 --> 00:15:14,905
That conflict. I'd just had my first one
night stand and I was chatting online...
62
00:15:15,613 --> 00:15:21,947
But with each sound I went offline
because I was terrified to get caught.
63
00:15:22,196 --> 00:15:27,404
That Vincent would know.
Even when I was making small talk.
64
00:15:29,738 --> 00:15:34,947
Yet a week later I was off fucking
my brains out in a hotel room.
65
00:15:36,237 --> 00:15:39,905
So something overcame my fear
of getting caught.
66
00:15:40,863 --> 00:15:44,529
Maybe the fear is not about
your husband or over loss.
67
00:15:45,571 --> 00:15:50,613
Well what then? I was terrified
that Vincent would find out.
68
00:15:51,237 --> 00:15:54,529
Because he'd figure out what
you're doing... what you are.
69
00:15:54,988 --> 00:15:56,112
Yes.
70
00:15:58,363 --> 00:16:03,321
Maybe you were afraid of recognizing
it yourself? What you're doing.
71
00:16:51,863 --> 00:16:53,863
You're home early.
72
00:17:01,154 --> 00:17:04,111
I don't know what to say.
73
00:17:09,779 --> 00:17:11,446
Sweetie...
74
00:17:12,321 --> 00:17:17,530
I really want to promise you that this
won't happen again and that I'll change...
75
00:17:18,738 --> 00:17:20,488
But I can't.
76
00:17:22,404 --> 00:17:24,363
Fuck you Stella!
77
00:17:24,947 --> 00:17:27,363
What am I supposed to do?
78
00:17:29,112 --> 00:17:31,863
Pretend to be someone else?
Ignore my feelings?
79
00:17:31,947 --> 00:17:35,947
How about taking my feelings into account.
We swore to be faithful remember?
80
00:17:36,613 --> 00:17:39,822
Sweetie, I am faithful to you.
81
00:17:40,321 --> 00:17:45,404
I'm faithful in sharing my vulnerabilities
and my fears and my secrets.
82
00:17:47,446 --> 00:17:49,905
Apparently not all your secrets.
83
00:17:50,238 --> 00:17:52,696
No.
Not all of them.
84
00:17:58,279 --> 00:18:00,738
You don't even look at me anymore.
85
00:18:01,571 --> 00:18:04,029
Not the way you used to.
86
00:18:07,321 --> 00:18:10,029
How long has it been since we fucked?
87
00:18:10,113 --> 00:18:13,113
I mean really fucked?
88
00:18:14,780 --> 00:18:17,780
I feel like a caged bird.
89
00:18:25,738 --> 00:18:27,905
So that's it?
90
00:19:12,946 --> 00:19:14,780
Hey!
91
00:19:49,113 --> 00:19:51,029
Goddammit you asshole.
92
00:20:31,363 --> 00:20:34,613
Let me out Goddammit!
93
00:20:56,280 --> 00:21:00,321
Will you guys go to that opening next week?
Otherwise I'll die of boredom.
94
00:21:01,405 --> 00:21:04,321
Sure, as long as there are drinks.
- The other girls will come too.
95
00:21:04,363 --> 00:21:06,488
All our events are catered.
96
00:21:07,238 --> 00:21:09,988
Good concept. Eating and doing business.
97
00:21:10,530 --> 00:21:12,904
What's the main attraction?
98
00:21:14,238 --> 00:21:16,238
What's the punishment for
dropping your bread?
99
00:21:17,571 --> 00:21:19,571
Caning is so ancient Rome.
100
00:21:23,196 --> 00:21:24,196
His jacket?
101
00:21:24,363 --> 00:21:27,946
We have the Lady of Mogilev.
- Can you believe it?
102
00:21:28,321 --> 00:21:30,363
It's an icon from Russia.
103
00:21:30,737 --> 00:21:33,697
For years it was collecting dust
in moldy storage rooms...
104
00:21:34,029 --> 00:21:36,988
...and they had no money to
restore the museums.
105
00:21:37,821 --> 00:21:41,071
Since the Wall fell,
they were allowed to sell.
106
00:21:41,154 --> 00:21:44,363
Did you know the virgin Mary
was the most popular in Russian art?
107
00:21:44,405 --> 00:21:47,029
What's with that worship of virgins?
108
00:21:47,613 --> 00:21:50,238
You can't worship an Icon.
You can honor it.
109
00:21:50,280 --> 00:21:52,904
I didn't know you were in to art?
110
00:21:54,321 --> 00:21:58,821
They say that when an Icon stops being
honored, the gold begins to peel off.
111
00:22:03,154 --> 00:22:04,572
Are you sure?
112
00:22:05,029 --> 00:22:06,446
Yes.
113
00:22:07,321 --> 00:22:09,530
You are the only ones I thought of.
114
00:22:11,530 --> 00:22:15,113
The tension is killing Luca.
I've never seen him so nervous.
115
00:22:16,321 --> 00:22:17,530
And what about you?
116
00:22:18,029 --> 00:22:19,655
Scared to death.
117
00:22:20,113 --> 00:22:21,737
And excited!
118
00:22:23,904 --> 00:22:25,530
So what's next?
119
00:22:26,613 --> 00:22:30,071
Well it's regular sauna.
We'll get used to each other...
120
00:22:30,655 --> 00:22:34,113
...and take it from there.
121
00:22:35,446 --> 00:22:38,904
I won't force it.
Our friendship is too important.
122
00:22:49,113 --> 00:22:50,655
Thanks.
123
00:24:42,821 --> 00:24:45,280
I'm sorry but I can't do this.
124
00:24:51,863 --> 00:24:54,612
I'm so sorry.
125
00:25:04,030 --> 00:25:05,738
That's a real shame.
126
00:25:20,405 --> 00:25:22,571
When did you first feel caged?
127
00:25:22,863 --> 00:25:28,779
When I realized that Vincent wasn't
the man I thought he was.
128
00:25:30,738 --> 00:25:33,863
He'd fallen from his pedestal.
129
00:25:34,363 --> 00:25:37,821
That sounds harsh.
I don't mean it that way.
130
00:25:39,322 --> 00:25:42,779
But it made me think...
131
00:25:43,113 --> 00:25:45,696
...and it stirred up something in me.
132
00:25:47,030 --> 00:25:48,405
It was...
133
00:25:49,113 --> 00:25:51,571
Something warm from deep in my belly...
134
00:25:51,863 --> 00:25:55,612
And spreading lower.
I mean really physical.
135
00:25:56,696 --> 00:26:01,571
And I couldn't resist it or apologize
for it. This literally happened.
136
00:30:48,571 --> 00:30:50,155
Who are you?
137
00:30:53,237 --> 00:30:54,821
Christine.
138
00:30:55,738 --> 00:30:57,321
I'm Stella.
139
00:30:59,780 --> 00:31:02,946
Could you tell who brought you here?
Did you see him?
140
00:31:06,696 --> 00:31:08,571
I was in my car.
141
00:31:09,279 --> 00:31:11,488
I got out in front of my house...
142
00:31:16,946 --> 00:31:19,279
And after that I can't remember anything.
143
00:31:22,196 --> 00:31:23,571
Hello?
144
00:31:23,821 --> 00:31:25,404
That's useless.
145
00:31:27,154 --> 00:31:28,738
Who's doing this?
146
00:31:29,279 --> 00:31:30,863
No idea.
147
00:31:31,571 --> 00:31:33,154
I've got no idea.
148
00:31:34,780 --> 00:31:37,154
We need to find a way to get out of here.
149
00:31:44,404 --> 00:31:46,030
Maybe it's some kind of joke.
150
00:31:46,863 --> 00:31:49,696
A joke?
- Yes. Maybe?
151
00:31:50,279 --> 00:31:53,404
I've been here five days already.
This is definitely not a joke.
152
00:31:54,905 --> 00:31:56,112
Five?
153
00:32:24,488 --> 00:32:25,988
We need to wait.
154
00:32:26,529 --> 00:32:28,655
Wait for the right moment.
155
00:32:58,321 --> 00:33:00,446
We need to sleep in shifts.
156
00:33:02,905 --> 00:33:06,112
Last time he grabbed me in my sleep.
I don't want that to happen again.
157
00:33:15,238 --> 00:33:16,404
Wait!
158
00:33:16,905 --> 00:33:18,404
Holy shit!
159
00:33:32,696 --> 00:33:34,571
You've got a cell phone?
160
00:33:44,488 --> 00:33:46,363
Fuck.
- What?
161
00:33:46,947 --> 00:33:48,821
No signal of course.
162
00:34:17,612 --> 00:34:20,029
Of course he knew this would happen.
163
00:34:21,112 --> 00:34:24,822
He's mind fucking me.
- Please stop swearing.
164
00:34:29,029 --> 00:34:30,655
I'm so wound up.
165
00:34:32,863 --> 00:34:34,863
I couldn't possibly sleep right now.
166
00:34:38,154 --> 00:34:39,822
Go ahead and sleep.
167
00:34:40,822 --> 00:34:43,571
If something happens
you'd be the first to know.
168
00:34:54,696 --> 00:34:56,363
My English sucks.
169
00:35:09,530 --> 00:35:10,696
Fuck.
170
00:35:11,363 --> 00:35:13,279
I do talk a little Dutch.
171
00:35:16,404 --> 00:35:19,446
My brother in law has just
come over from Russia.
172
00:35:21,071 --> 00:35:24,405
My wife's lived here for years.
Every year he comes to visit.
173
00:35:24,738 --> 00:35:27,071
We thought this would be a fun night out.
174
00:35:33,696 --> 00:35:36,029
And you? Are you here
with your husband?
175
00:35:37,238 --> 00:35:40,904
If I was I wouldn't be standing
here talking to you.
176
00:35:41,321 --> 00:35:44,154
Oh? What's wrong with a
little friendly conversation?
177
00:35:44,238 --> 00:35:46,530
Nothing at all.
178
00:35:46,946 --> 00:35:49,238
But try explaining that to my husband.
179
00:35:49,446 --> 00:35:51,363
Yeah, and my wife.
180
00:35:52,154 --> 00:35:54,071
Where is she anyway?
181
00:35:54,321 --> 00:35:58,530
Why do we need permission from others
when things feel right?
182
00:36:01,113 --> 00:36:03,571
But that ends right here.
183
00:36:47,279 --> 00:36:49,113
You want it all.
184
00:36:49,363 --> 00:36:52,862
You want love and attention
from one person...
185
00:36:53,154 --> 00:36:56,655
...and sex and adventures
with all the others.
186
00:36:57,363 --> 00:37:00,154
Is that so bad?
Wicked?
187
00:37:01,196 --> 00:37:04,488
Am I a bad and wicked woman
and am I doomed?
188
00:37:04,655 --> 00:37:07,862
No, no. I'm not judging.
189
00:37:08,071 --> 00:37:10,530
I'm just observing.
190
00:37:11,613 --> 00:37:13,655
Maybe I'm too greedy.
191
00:37:14,988 --> 00:37:18,488
If I make love with someone I care about,
then I make love with him.
192
00:37:19,196 --> 00:37:22,697
If I have sex with a stranger
I have sex with myself.
193
00:37:24,321 --> 00:37:29,571
I use my body. I feel everything
and I conquer myself.
194
00:37:31,446 --> 00:37:35,530
My libaration is part sexual...
195
00:37:35,738 --> 00:37:38,571
...but is not just sex.
196
00:37:39,655 --> 00:37:42,488
It was like taking off a straitjacket.
197
00:37:43,988 --> 00:37:45,405
And when it came off...
198
00:37:45,988 --> 00:37:49,280
...instead a frightened girl a
strong woman appeared.
199
00:37:49,821 --> 00:37:52,446
A complete metamorphosis.
200
00:38:01,154 --> 00:38:03,113
Christine?
201
00:38:08,738 --> 00:38:10,697
Christine!
202
00:38:14,613 --> 00:38:16,697
Goddammit!
203
00:38:19,363 --> 00:38:21,862
Asshole. Son of a bitch!
204
00:38:43,613 --> 00:38:45,238
I've been thinking.
205
00:38:49,071 --> 00:38:53,655
I called John and I can stay
with him for a while.
206
00:41:26,196 --> 00:41:27,196
I...
207
00:41:28,196 --> 00:41:30,821
I noticed you on the SDD site.
208
00:41:32,696 --> 00:41:33,696
SDD?
209
00:41:35,029 --> 00:41:37,904
Nice photos.
Nice profile.
210
00:41:41,654 --> 00:41:44,988
How did you see the pictures.
You have to be a paying member...
211
00:41:45,488 --> 00:41:46,529
Yep.
212
00:41:48,738 --> 00:41:49,779
True.
213
00:41:50,321 --> 00:41:52,363
Et tu Judy?
214
00:41:56,238 --> 00:41:58,280
What's your name on SDD?
215
00:41:59,155 --> 00:42:00,821
Madelief 69.
216
00:42:02,238 --> 00:42:04,280
Not the year you're born is it?
217
00:42:08,196 --> 00:42:10,654
I'd be fun to get together sometime.
218
00:42:12,071 --> 00:42:13,946
Who knows?
219
00:42:15,405 --> 00:42:17,738
Judy, can you come in for a moment.
220
00:42:36,946 --> 00:42:39,280
Have a good weekend.
See you on Monday.
221
00:42:40,405 --> 00:42:43,571
Could you turn all the lights off when
you leave and don't forget the alarm.
222
00:42:43,779 --> 00:42:46,405
Will do. Have a good weekend.
223
00:42:59,196 --> 00:43:01,821
I've been thinking of you all day.
224
00:43:03,863 --> 00:43:05,613
And I want to confess something.
225
00:43:07,363 --> 00:43:08,363
Oh?
226
00:43:11,322 --> 00:43:13,946
I am a member of the site...
227
00:43:15,196 --> 00:43:17,405
...but I've never been to a club before.
228
00:43:18,322 --> 00:43:20,529
You want me to take you
with me sometime?
229
00:43:22,738 --> 00:43:23,904
Yes.
230
00:43:24,238 --> 00:43:26,446
I don't know if that's
such a good idea.
231
00:43:28,654 --> 00:43:31,405
We have to see each other
every day at work.
232
00:43:40,363 --> 00:43:42,738
Am I attractive enough?
233
00:43:43,779 --> 00:43:45,863
You are a beautiful woman.
234
00:43:46,654 --> 00:43:48,196
That's not the problem.
235
00:43:50,322 --> 00:43:52,404
Nobody has to know.
236
00:43:54,529 --> 00:43:56,071
I mean...
237
00:43:56,363 --> 00:43:59,071
...who would I tell anyway?
238
00:44:57,404 --> 00:45:00,113
I slept great.
239
00:45:02,155 --> 00:45:04,238
Not quite enough of course.
240
00:45:06,654 --> 00:45:08,155
Come...
241
00:45:09,488 --> 00:45:10,988
No.
242
00:45:14,197 --> 00:45:15,696
Is something wrong?
243
00:45:19,613 --> 00:45:21,863
No, but I think you should go.
244
00:45:22,030 --> 00:45:23,613
Jeez...
245
00:45:24,238 --> 00:45:26,488
Can I have a minute to wake up?
246
00:45:26,905 --> 00:45:28,155
Of course.
247
00:45:32,946 --> 00:45:35,197
The coffee is ready downstairs.
248
00:45:39,613 --> 00:45:41,529
Where do you want this to go?
249
00:45:43,280 --> 00:45:44,821
To go?
250
00:45:45,446 --> 00:45:47,362
With our relationship?
251
00:46:04,321 --> 00:46:07,113
Stella? Get in here!
252
00:46:08,238 --> 00:46:09,863
Of course.
253
00:46:15,988 --> 00:46:18,780
And shut that door.
254
00:47:10,321 --> 00:47:13,113
It's okay. You're back.
255
00:47:32,780 --> 00:47:33,946
It's okay.
256
00:47:34,780 --> 00:47:38,113
I'm fine. I'm fine.
257
00:47:41,196 --> 00:47:42,821
Just one more minute.
258
00:47:50,363 --> 00:47:51,988
He made me come.
259
00:47:53,488 --> 00:47:55,113
I didn't want to.
260
00:47:57,446 --> 00:47:59,072
I just...
261
00:48:00,363 --> 00:48:01,988
...stopped resisting.
262
00:48:07,154 --> 00:48:08,780
Goddamit.
263
00:48:11,154 --> 00:48:12,780
Oh, I'm sorry.
264
00:48:20,154 --> 00:48:23,404
And now all I can think about is those
stupid magazine surveys.
265
00:48:25,030 --> 00:48:28,279
"What's the most exciting place you did it?"
266
00:49:23,030 --> 00:49:24,655
No!
267
00:49:33,863 --> 00:49:35,488
Are you okay?
268
00:49:37,488 --> 00:49:39,112
No one is coming to help us.
269
00:49:40,071 --> 00:49:41,696
What?
270
00:49:43,655 --> 00:49:45,279
Why would you think that?
271
00:49:47,071 --> 00:49:49,196
My husband is definitely
looking for me.
272
00:49:55,905 --> 00:49:58,029
What's your husband's name?
273
00:49:59,530 --> 00:50:01,112
Vincent.
274
00:50:01,905 --> 00:50:04,029
And he doesn't miss you?
275
00:50:05,196 --> 00:50:06,571
No.
276
00:50:07,655 --> 00:50:09,780
I don't think so, no.
277
00:50:10,238 --> 00:50:14,613
Why is that?
You've been gone for days already.
278
00:50:17,530 --> 00:50:21,905
Things aren't going so great between us.
He's staying with a friend.
279
00:50:26,279 --> 00:50:28,029
Is he with someone else?
280
00:50:28,738 --> 00:50:30,112
No.
281
00:50:31,613 --> 00:50:32,988
Are you?
282
00:50:34,029 --> 00:50:35,404
No.
283
00:50:36,196 --> 00:50:37,571
Not really.
284
00:50:39,404 --> 00:50:40,780
Not really?
285
00:50:44,279 --> 00:50:47,446
Not with any ONE.
It's a long story.
286
00:50:54,488 --> 00:50:56,738
Is that why you broke up?
287
00:50:57,571 --> 00:51:00,238
What?
- Well what you just said.
288
00:51:01,238 --> 00:51:03,154
Not any ONE.
289
00:51:04,196 --> 00:51:06,238
You have lots of lovers?
290
00:51:07,112 --> 00:51:09,780
Lovers is a big word.
291
00:51:12,196 --> 00:51:13,822
Don't you feel guilty?
292
00:51:15,780 --> 00:51:18,613
There's nothing I can do about it.
I sure have tried.
293
00:51:20,488 --> 00:51:22,196
I couldn't do that.
294
00:51:23,238 --> 00:51:27,404
Let's talk about something else.
How do we get out of here for example.
295
00:51:27,655 --> 00:51:29,363
What do you suggest?
296
00:51:31,238 --> 00:51:34,154
We need to make sure that he's alone.
- Excuse me?
297
00:51:35,946 --> 00:51:39,363
I think he's not alone.
- Why would you think that?
298
00:51:41,238 --> 00:51:43,196
Just a feeling.
299
00:57:43,071 --> 00:57:44,280
Are you okay?
300
00:57:47,071 --> 00:57:48,779
Yeah, I think so.
301
00:57:51,863 --> 00:57:53,612
I put your clothes on for you.
302
00:57:54,988 --> 00:57:56,863
You were pretty out of it.
303
00:57:57,029 --> 00:57:58,946
He slipped me something.
304
00:58:00,612 --> 00:58:01,738
What?
305
00:58:02,696 --> 00:58:05,405
No idea.
It looked like G.
306
00:58:06,280 --> 00:58:07,405
G?
307
00:58:08,612 --> 00:58:11,113
GHB. The drug.
308
00:58:13,029 --> 00:58:15,530
How would you know?
309
00:58:31,863 --> 00:58:32,779
Hey...
310
00:58:36,612 --> 00:58:39,113
He said that I'm here because of you.
311
00:58:39,863 --> 00:58:41,488
Did he say something to you?
312
00:58:43,155 --> 00:58:44,280
Yes.
313
00:58:45,988 --> 00:58:48,696
He said: if you're wondering you're here...
314
00:58:48,821 --> 00:58:51,155
...try asking your little friend.
315
00:58:54,529 --> 00:58:57,238
If he doesn't talk to me
it must mean I know him.
316
00:59:00,529 --> 00:59:03,322
Can you think where
you've been lately?
317
00:59:05,196 --> 00:59:07,904
He's afraid I'll recognize him.
318
00:59:10,155 --> 00:59:11,654
Think.
319
00:59:13,863 --> 00:59:15,904
Maybe one of your dates?
320
00:59:18,821 --> 00:59:22,571
How many men have you fucked lately?
And then dumped?
321
00:59:23,363 --> 00:59:24,238
My God.
322
00:59:28,322 --> 00:59:31,155
Sure, now God is there to help you.
323
00:59:31,738 --> 00:59:33,238
Think!
324
00:59:35,030 --> 00:59:38,571
Have you made enemies somewhere?
Do you have stalkers?
325
00:59:39,821 --> 00:59:41,322
Think!
326
00:59:50,571 --> 00:59:52,405
You here?
- Yes.
327
00:59:54,280 --> 00:59:55,863
How's work?
328
00:59:57,071 --> 00:59:58,654
I miss you.
329
01:00:03,529 --> 01:00:08,738
It's not that I regret what we did,
but I think it's best if we leave it be.
330
01:00:10,238 --> 01:00:13,030
Just take some time to think about it.
331
01:00:14,113 --> 01:00:16,904
Well I don't think...
- Now that Vincent's gone...
332
01:00:17,571 --> 01:00:20,363
...I wanted to ask you if I
could come by tonight.
333
01:00:21,404 --> 01:00:23,529
I don't think that's a good idea.
334
01:00:25,946 --> 01:00:28,738
You can't just use me like this.
- Excuse me?
335
01:00:29,863 --> 01:00:34,196
Why don't you answer my text messages?
- Judy, let's not make...
336
01:00:34,280 --> 01:00:37,446
You used me and dumped me.
337
01:00:37,487 --> 01:00:40,738
If you really want to talk about it,
can we please do this somewhere else?
338
01:00:40,821 --> 01:00:44,071
You really hurt me.
- Right.
339
01:00:44,738 --> 01:00:47,196
I'm on my way to a birthday party.
340
01:00:54,738 --> 01:00:56,363
Goddamit.
341
01:00:57,155 --> 01:00:58,779
What?
342
01:00:58,863 --> 01:01:00,487
He took my wedding ring.
343
01:01:00,654 --> 01:01:03,113
I have people who care about me bitch!
344
01:01:03,322 --> 01:01:06,446
And now there's a man molesting me
because you've something to hide.
345
01:01:06,571 --> 01:01:08,197
Stop it!
346
01:01:08,362 --> 01:01:10,654
Do you think I want this?
347
01:01:20,071 --> 01:01:21,696
This is what he wants.
348
01:01:23,238 --> 01:01:26,487
He wants a front row seat for
seeing how we tear each other apart.
349
01:01:26,571 --> 01:01:29,113
You have to tell me more.
350
01:01:33,946 --> 01:01:35,571
I beg you.
351
01:01:39,696 --> 01:01:42,238
I don't think you want to hear
these things.
352
01:01:45,071 --> 01:01:47,613
I'll deal with it.
353
01:01:52,988 --> 01:01:54,863
Tell me about you.
354
01:01:57,654 --> 01:02:01,571
I'm a clean slate.
This must have something to do with you.
355
01:02:04,946 --> 01:02:07,529
How can you cheat on
your husband like that?
356
01:02:13,404 --> 01:02:15,988
Sex is exclusive.
357
01:02:17,030 --> 01:02:20,696
I get that in other ways.
Sex is just sex to me.
358
01:02:21,321 --> 01:02:23,696
What's more personal than sex?
359
01:02:25,488 --> 01:02:29,571
Your fears? Your inhibitions?
Your heartbreak.
360
01:02:32,030 --> 01:02:33,821
Your insecurities?
361
01:02:35,362 --> 01:02:37,155
Unconditional love.
362
01:02:40,238 --> 01:02:44,321
That's what me and my brother have.
We would do anything for each other.
363
01:02:45,571 --> 01:02:49,321
I've missed that bond because
my parents got divorced.
364
01:02:50,321 --> 01:02:52,279
When I was five years old.
365
01:02:53,571 --> 01:02:55,780
I didn't see my father anymore.
366
01:02:56,780 --> 01:02:59,821
He left the country.
Him and my brother.
367
01:03:00,238 --> 01:03:01,905
You never went to visit them?
368
01:03:02,071 --> 01:03:03,738
No I couldn't.
369
01:03:06,488 --> 01:03:08,863
It all comes back to childhood doesn't it?
370
01:03:10,654 --> 01:03:12,905
So it's all my father's fault as usual?
371
01:03:14,113 --> 01:03:18,113
Sweetie, my childhood was pretty easy.
372
01:03:23,279 --> 01:03:28,362
When a woman is sexually aggressive they think
she's traumatized or something's wrong with her.
373
01:03:29,613 --> 01:03:32,321
Men are studs, women are sluts.
374
01:03:34,696 --> 01:03:38,654
Why can't they just accept that
this is something I want?
375
01:03:45,863 --> 01:03:53,072
It feels right. I feel more alive,
I respect people and I have more energy.
376
01:03:54,905 --> 01:03:59,113
Maybe it's that behavior that's
causing all your problems.
377
01:04:00,072 --> 01:04:03,237
You can't interpret your promise
to God at your whim.
378
01:04:03,863 --> 01:04:07,030
Where is it written in the wedding vows
that I can't fuck other people?
379
01:04:07,446 --> 01:04:08,780
I beg your pardon?
380
01:04:08,946 --> 01:04:12,113
Loyalty is something different than
agreeing not seeing other people.
381
01:04:12,738 --> 01:04:15,321
And please stop lecturing me.
382
01:04:17,072 --> 01:04:21,654
They say when you're a grown up
you can do anything you want.
383
01:04:23,363 --> 01:04:25,446
Well I sure haven't noticed it.
384
01:04:25,654 --> 01:04:29,613
First my father tells me
what I can and can't do.
385
01:04:30,404 --> 01:04:33,237
Then the school controls my life.
386
01:04:34,321 --> 01:04:37,946
My boss, my friends with
their expectations.
387
01:04:38,196 --> 01:04:42,613
The plant that needs watering.
The fridge that needs it's weekly filling...
388
01:04:42,863 --> 01:04:47,237
...and finally Vincent who
gives me his bi weekly.
389
01:04:50,738 --> 01:04:56,154
But there once was a time
where I considered quitting.
390
01:04:57,113 --> 01:04:58,946
I mean quitting everything.
391
01:05:03,571 --> 01:05:07,196
And then there was that night
were everything changed.
392
01:05:09,529 --> 01:05:11,571
I was at a friends' house.
393
01:05:14,279 --> 01:05:17,988
We're playing trivial pursuit.
I won.
394
01:05:20,154 --> 01:05:24,988
I enjoyed the red wine for the first time
in years. And it even made me joyful.
395
01:05:26,571 --> 01:05:28,613
And on my way home...
396
01:05:29,696 --> 01:05:32,112
...suddenly a blizzard started.
397
01:05:32,947 --> 01:05:38,154
In the middle of the night on an
unlit highway, in the middle of nowhere.
398
01:05:40,321 --> 01:05:42,738
I made a game with myself.
399
01:05:45,237 --> 01:05:49,237
Drive unblinking into the snow
and hit something...
400
01:05:50,905 --> 01:05:54,363
...or focus and get myself safely home.
401
01:05:55,863 --> 01:05:57,780
I chose the latter.
402
01:05:58,988 --> 01:06:01,112
I turned the radio on and just drove.
403
01:06:02,404 --> 01:06:05,488
On the radio was a guest...
404
01:06:06,488 --> 01:06:10,529
...and he was also depressed
and he had survived it.
405
01:06:12,446 --> 01:06:14,279
He described exactly how I felt.
406
01:06:16,071 --> 01:06:18,863
And then they played my
kind of music and...
407
01:06:19,696 --> 01:06:23,154
...something peaceful settled
into to me that never left.
408
01:06:28,446 --> 01:06:31,905
I could do it.
I could choose.
409
01:06:32,947 --> 01:06:37,196
And after that night I didn't just
think about sex... I WAS sex.
410
01:06:38,112 --> 01:06:39,821
My body became a flower...
411
01:06:39,821 --> 01:06:43,613
...and I bloomed wider
than ever before.
412
01:06:43,780 --> 01:06:45,488
The game was on.
413
01:06:46,571 --> 01:06:48,655
First with men. Secret and fast.
414
01:06:50,279 --> 01:06:52,363
After that with a woman.
415
01:06:53,655 --> 01:06:55,738
A horny friend.
416
01:06:56,821 --> 01:06:58,905
Kisses and dirty talk.
417
01:07:00,029 --> 01:07:04,530
And after we attacked her husband
together there was no stopping me.
418
01:07:09,738 --> 01:07:15,863
What I feel now is worlds apart
from the way I felt in my cage.
419
01:07:18,863 --> 01:07:20,238
I caress my arm.
420
01:07:21,863 --> 01:07:25,279
I curl my toes from happiness.
I paint my nails...
421
01:07:28,446 --> 01:07:31,863
I shave everything
that can be smooth.
422
01:07:34,029 --> 01:07:39,279
And not for anyone else.
I do it because my body wants me.
423
01:07:39,404 --> 01:07:43,071
If I ride my bike I feel the seat
on my pussy. If I flirt...
424
01:07:43,238 --> 01:07:46,404
...the world winks at me back.
425
01:07:46,905 --> 01:07:51,863
My body is celebrating. 24 hours a day,
7 days per week, it just celebrates.
426
01:07:52,154 --> 01:07:58,822
I sent invitations for whoever wants to
join and I leave the door wide open.
427
01:07:58,946 --> 01:08:05,446
When I have sex there are no thoughts,
No father's voice telling me what to do...
428
01:08:05,571 --> 01:08:08,029
...or a boyfriend asking me what I like.
429
01:08:08,571 --> 01:08:11,028
This is just for me.
430
01:08:16,028 --> 01:08:17,905
And sometimes I feel guilty.
431
01:08:20,113 --> 01:08:21,571
Terribly guilty.
432
01:08:23,570 --> 01:08:27,113
In life you can run away from
everything exept yourself.
433
01:08:27,655 --> 01:08:29,655
Things can get back at you...
434
01:08:30,780 --> 01:08:33,946
...but in the end you're the one who
has to pay the price.
435
01:08:36,279 --> 01:08:39,446
So now I've become that
mythical creature...
436
01:08:41,445 --> 01:08:44,612
A woman that all men
fantasize about...
437
01:08:45,987 --> 01:08:48,321
...but think she doesn't exist.
438
01:08:50,445 --> 01:08:52,237
A unicorn.
439
01:09:17,154 --> 01:09:20,196
How can I explain this to people?
440
01:09:21,320 --> 01:09:22,654
What words can I use?
441
01:09:23,278 --> 01:09:29,154
It's just like going to a movie but I step
into the film and become part of it.
442
01:12:34,280 --> 01:12:35,655
Tell me...
443
01:12:35,946 --> 01:12:38,071
Did you enjoy the view?
444
01:12:38,488 --> 01:12:40,405
I still am.
445
01:12:43,280 --> 01:12:45,196
Can I have a Bitter Lemon?
446
01:12:52,737 --> 01:12:54,654
Where's your wife?
447
01:12:57,196 --> 01:12:59,113
I tied her up at home.
448
01:13:02,363 --> 01:13:04,280
Have you ever been tied up?
449
01:13:13,530 --> 01:13:15,696
You like to be in control don't you?
450
01:13:23,238 --> 01:13:25,654
Raymond. We need you.
451
01:13:27,029 --> 01:13:28,321
I'll be there.
452
01:13:34,946 --> 01:13:36,447
I'll be back.
453
01:14:53,488 --> 01:14:55,571
Exciting paintings.
454
01:15:10,447 --> 01:15:11,946
Two and a half.
455
01:15:13,529 --> 01:15:15,030
Cheers.
456
01:19:18,821 --> 01:19:21,529
We are not going to play with ourselves.
457
01:20:47,905 --> 01:20:49,072
Hey.
458
01:20:50,446 --> 01:20:52,030
What the hell are you doing?
459
01:20:53,196 --> 01:20:55,571
Much better like this.
- Asshole!
460
01:21:08,780 --> 01:21:11,655
Much better. Now I feel you.
Like this...
461
01:21:29,237 --> 01:21:30,613
Come on!
462
01:22:09,655 --> 01:22:13,571
I belong to the one in four women
who fantasizes about that.
463
01:22:14,655 --> 01:22:20,196
Thousands of women finger themselves
each night to their fantasy of forced sex.
464
01:22:21,696 --> 01:22:24,613
One attacker.
Two.
465
01:22:26,488 --> 01:22:28,196
Or five.
466
01:22:29,863 --> 01:22:35,655
Two between my legs, two in the hand
and one in the mouth.
467
01:22:38,863 --> 01:22:42,196
Isn't it great? Fantasizing is fine...
468
01:22:42,905 --> 01:22:45,947
...but when push comes to shove
the reality is different.
469
01:22:46,321 --> 01:22:48,196
That's logical isn't it?
470
01:22:50,780 --> 01:22:53,321
Then why do we have these fantasies?
471
01:22:53,446 --> 01:22:56,947
Why do we scream our heads off
if one is a bit rough with us...
472
01:22:57,655 --> 01:23:01,154
...but in our mind we can take on five.
473
01:23:03,071 --> 01:23:05,905
These are the things I wonder about.
474
01:23:09,613 --> 01:23:14,030
I decided right there I wouldn't let
one bad apple spoil my pleasures.
475
01:23:15,571 --> 01:23:19,029
I could've easily decide to
throw in the towel...
476
01:23:19,738 --> 01:23:22,696
...but instead I became
more self-confident.
477
01:23:23,905 --> 01:23:26,238
Do you think he's behind this?
478
01:23:27,738 --> 01:23:29,154
You know...
479
01:23:30,238 --> 01:23:34,696
...everyone that I know is busy fighting
to get back what they once had...
480
01:23:35,821 --> 01:23:39,488
I'm fighting for what I want to become.
481
01:23:51,863 --> 01:23:55,696
Whatever it is, I'm sorry.
I'm truly sorry.
482
01:23:56,488 --> 01:24:01,029
If I did anything wrong,
I'm sorry okay?
483
01:24:38,905 --> 01:24:40,196
Hello!
484
01:24:52,571 --> 01:24:54,780
He cut me.
485
01:25:03,279 --> 01:25:05,029
There were two of them.
486
01:25:06,863 --> 01:25:08,571
There was another guy.
487
01:25:24,822 --> 01:25:26,196
Are you in pain?
488
01:25:29,196 --> 01:25:30,238
Hey.
489
01:25:30,904 --> 01:25:32,029
Does it hurt?
490
01:25:32,154 --> 01:25:35,279
I think it's anesthetized.
I'm not sure.
491
01:25:39,946 --> 01:25:41,822
No anesthesia then.
492
01:26:13,780 --> 01:26:15,655
Goddammit!
493
01:26:19,822 --> 01:26:22,238
I'm starting to see what they are up to.
494
01:26:23,822 --> 01:26:26,238
Do you know "A clockwork orange"?
495
01:26:29,946 --> 01:26:33,154
A violent person is
bombarded with violent images...
496
01:26:33,446 --> 01:26:36,488
...so that even he can't
take it anymore.
497
01:26:38,029 --> 01:26:40,655
They are trying to destroy me.
498
01:26:42,613 --> 01:26:44,780
To destroy what I have.
499
01:26:45,780 --> 01:26:47,946
My freedom.
500
01:26:51,154 --> 01:26:53,738
I won't let all this take it
away from me.
501
01:26:54,071 --> 01:26:56,655
Suppose we get out of here tomorrow.
502
01:26:56,904 --> 01:26:59,488
Would you just pick up where you left off?
503
01:27:00,946 --> 01:27:03,530
Could you go off to a sex party again?
504
01:27:05,988 --> 01:27:08,571
I think I'd have some trouble with that.
505
01:27:12,321 --> 01:27:17,446
Just like I do you disconnect sex from the
feelings you have on that table.
506
01:27:19,655 --> 01:27:24,321
And the lust and the pleasure of sex...
507
01:27:25,446 --> 01:27:27,446
...get replaced by fear.
508
01:27:33,446 --> 01:27:36,530
So we need to replace all this
with something else...
509
01:27:37,530 --> 01:27:39,779
To get rid of the fear?
510
01:27:57,697 --> 01:27:59,321
What turns you on?
511
01:28:01,029 --> 01:28:02,446
Sorry?
512
01:28:02,862 --> 01:28:04,488
No don't apologize.
513
01:28:05,862 --> 01:28:07,280
Visualize it.
514
01:28:10,238 --> 01:28:11,363
I can't.
515
01:28:14,405 --> 01:28:17,655
Usually I can talk about
this stuff so easily...
516
01:28:19,405 --> 01:28:21,572
...but with you it's different.
517
01:28:22,321 --> 01:28:26,904
Oh... because I'm monogamous
you think I don't fantasize?
518
01:28:32,238 --> 01:28:34,154
I love control.
519
01:28:37,196 --> 01:28:41,196
I like to be on top so
I can control the rhythm.
520
01:28:46,280 --> 01:28:48,280
I love giving head.
521
01:28:49,113 --> 01:28:52,071
Because it gives me so much power.
522
01:28:54,280 --> 01:28:57,238
His whole manhood in my mouth.
523
01:29:00,280 --> 01:29:03,238
I love looking at myself.
- Really?
524
01:29:05,946 --> 01:29:10,821
Mirrors.
- Pictures? Video?
525
01:29:14,029 --> 01:29:15,988
That's hot.
526
01:29:19,154 --> 01:29:20,655
I...
527
01:29:23,779 --> 01:29:26,321
I've an exhibitionist streak.
528
01:29:30,405 --> 01:29:32,946
I go in public without my panties on.
529
01:29:33,321 --> 01:29:36,488
Really you'd do that?
- Yes.
530
01:29:39,613 --> 01:29:41,988
One time I was shopping with my friends...
531
01:29:42,696 --> 01:29:45,071
...and we went for a drink in a cafe.
532
01:29:47,155 --> 01:29:50,737
A guy at the bar and I found
ourselves staring at each other.
533
01:29:52,280 --> 01:29:55,405
His eye contact was so strong...
534
01:29:55,821 --> 01:29:58,946
...so horny and full of lust...
535
01:30:00,029 --> 01:30:02,488
I had to go to the ladies room.
536
01:30:02,946 --> 01:30:04,988
I had to make myself come.
537
01:30:05,280 --> 01:30:09,613
He came into the ladies room,
closed the door behind him...
538
01:30:11,071 --> 01:30:13,863
...and fucked me against the wall...
539
01:30:14,238 --> 01:30:16,321
...and without saying a
single word he left.
540
01:30:21,238 --> 01:30:24,071
What do you think is the most
beautiful thing about yourself?
541
01:30:27,029 --> 01:30:28,530
My ass.
542
01:30:29,280 --> 01:30:31,238
I think your breasts are.
543
01:30:33,779 --> 01:30:35,405
The way you carry yourself.
544
01:30:36,779 --> 01:30:38,321
Your scent.
545
01:30:49,113 --> 01:30:50,654
What are you doing?
546
01:30:52,612 --> 01:30:53,863
Visualizing.
547
01:31:18,612 --> 01:31:19,863
Sorry.
548
01:31:22,612 --> 01:31:23,863
Sorry.
549
01:31:31,571 --> 01:31:33,612
My husband left me.
550
01:31:36,113 --> 01:31:37,280
What?
551
01:31:39,196 --> 01:31:40,363
Damian.
552
01:31:43,529 --> 01:31:45,863
He cheated on me last month.
553
01:31:50,155 --> 01:31:52,488
And you're only telling me now.
554
01:31:52,779 --> 01:31:54,155
Why?
555
01:31:55,280 --> 01:31:58,654
He met someone else.
556
01:32:21,946 --> 01:32:23,904
First they betray you.
557
01:32:25,363 --> 01:32:30,654
Then they do what they please and
leave you behind as if it's all your fault.
558
01:32:33,071 --> 01:32:35,030
I hate that.
559
01:32:36,988 --> 01:32:38,863
That's not right.
560
01:32:43,571 --> 01:32:46,779
We're going to get out of here.
I won't last much longer.
561
01:32:49,696 --> 01:32:51,863
That betrayal.
562
01:32:54,196 --> 01:33:00,779
It has such a grip on all other emotions
that it chokes everything...
563
01:33:03,405 --> 01:33:05,988
...until everything is dead.
564
01:33:09,821 --> 01:33:11,738
Except the rage.
565
01:33:17,821 --> 01:33:21,113
I saw it when my parents got divorced.
566
01:33:35,738 --> 01:33:37,654
You're a unique woman.
567
01:37:01,571 --> 01:37:03,696
What did you do?
568
01:37:06,237 --> 01:37:08,321
What have you gotten me in to?
569
01:37:10,321 --> 01:37:13,571
I don't understand you.
You were supposed to break her.
570
01:37:13,905 --> 01:37:16,155
To teach Damian a lesson.
571
01:37:16,780 --> 01:37:18,654
Do you think I was joking?
572
01:37:21,613 --> 01:37:23,488
What the fuck!
573
01:37:30,446 --> 01:37:32,571
My God Christina what have you done?
574
01:37:34,446 --> 01:37:36,321
I can't do this.
- Shut up!
575
01:39:20,571 --> 01:39:24,363
Okay.
We've got to leave her behind.
576
01:39:24,780 --> 01:39:28,363
She still doesn't know anything.
Not who we are, not where we live.
577
01:39:38,655 --> 01:39:41,613
I'm going back tomorrow and
you're coming with me.
578
01:39:49,112 --> 01:39:53,071
Do you realize what you've destroyed?
579
01:39:59,988 --> 01:40:02,238
There's really something wrong with you.
580
01:40:17,821 --> 01:40:18,863
Good.
581
01:40:22,071 --> 01:40:24,863
We'll finish up and leave her behind.
582
01:40:30,571 --> 01:40:33,863
No one will come by and
it's up to her to get out.
583
01:40:34,738 --> 01:40:35,571
Meanwhile...
584
01:42:23,279 --> 01:42:25,113
Well...
585
01:42:25,696 --> 01:42:30,904
And if you, the Stella from now,
look at the Stella from a year ago...
586
01:42:31,655 --> 01:42:33,196
...what do you see?
587
01:42:35,071 --> 01:42:38,780
That now, like then...
588
01:42:40,530 --> 01:42:43,946
...she's alone and
probably always will be.
589
01:42:44,697 --> 01:42:49,904
That I had secrets then from myself,
but now only from other people.
590
01:42:51,655 --> 01:42:54,655
And I'd tell her that
symbioses doesn't exist.
591
01:42:56,029 --> 01:42:57,238
That...
592
01:42:58,613 --> 01:43:01,613
...she wants a connection
but she'll never get it.
593
01:43:01,946 --> 01:43:06,488
However painful this discovery is
and how liberating...
594
01:43:07,822 --> 01:43:12,363
but sacrifices have to be made
if you don't want to be alone.
595
01:43:19,029 --> 01:43:20,697
Thank you.
40554
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