Original subtitles

Subtitles by explosiveskull www.OpenSubtitles.org

What?

Down. Down.

No, no! Don't tase me!

Uh, I thought maybe they were important leggings?

Uh...

all right, I'm gonna...

Yeah?

You're stupid.

I'm gonna give y'all a couple minutes to talk.

I'll be right there.

Oh. Wow, you are wearing next to nothing.

I-Is that one of the guys from your gay dodgeball team?

No. That is Shep,

Kate's ex-fiancé,

the first one.

Shep, the Georgia one.

- Yeah. - Okay.

He's not, in your opinion,

in any way, physically attractive, right?

Yeah.

I don't think so.

I'm... I'm sorry.

Um...

it's just it's a really strange time.

Is that why you didn't come last night?

It's not like you.

I shouldn't have stood you up.

I shouldn't have done that. I just...

Swoosh.

Hey. I'm Shep.

Cool.

Why can't he drink? It's Saturday.

There is the Michael I know and love.

Yep.

Okay.

Yay.

Okay. Part three.

Is this...

Wigminton! Fuck, yes!

What's wigminton?

Wigminton is my fucking jam, is what it is.

Okay, it's when, uh, muscular gay guys get together

and prove that they are gay by putting on wigs,

but also that they're not too gay by playing sports.

It's fucking badass. Oh, my God. Thank you.

Can I play? I'd love to play, if that's allowed.

I know the rules

of your community can be very specific.

We'd be honored if you would play with us.

Let the games begin!

Argh!

Jesus Christ.

'm not trying to intimidate you, dawg,

but I was the Wii Tennis champ at my bunk

at Camp B'nai Shalom.

Come on. It's noon.

I did Google it, and I found it. AA.com.

Okay, who wants to play first?

Blondes verse brunettes?

Ooh, ooh, deaf against hearing.

I can be on both teams.

And break!

So you're like a gym guy?

Ah, no, I don't really work out.

I just lift a lot of boxes and stuff.

Oh, cool. So this is, like, natural then?

Judge, referee,

king of the world.

Okay, king,

so what are we playing for?

Love it.

Boom!

This is what bonding looks like.

Like what?

Happy? Fun?

Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine with it.

Oh, good. Okay.

This is gonna be a fun day.

It's a little weird and overwhelming, huh, all the signing?

Sometimes. I understand some.

How long you in town for?

Good question. I don't know.

I came to surprise Kate,

and then she stood me up last night.

Oh, really? Oh.

Oh, that's... that's rough, man.

- I'm sorry. - Yeah.

We had this amazing morning,

and then, all of a sudden, she flakes on dinner.

Ucch. Well, guy to guy, um, it just sounds

like she's not feeling you, you know?

I mean, what was amazing about the other morning,

you were saying, specifically?

Ooh! You're scoring on yourself.

Come on. Let me score on you.

Your friends seem nice.

Like I said...

it's just been a really strange time.

If it's a no,

you can just tell me no.

What if it's a "I don't know"?

I'm... I'm gonna get some water.

I'm thirsty. Are you thirsty?

I am in the finals.

Proud of me?

And I am getting along with Kate today.

Whoo!

Okay. Just one second.

Just hold on. Okay.

I'm four points from the singles championship.

Just root for me.

Hey, hey.

Okay. Whatever.

Keep going.

What about the singles?

Babe?

Nice.

Ah. Funny.

Okay. Okay, not funny.

Stop.

Yeah, I see you, too.

Uhh. Off.

Last round, guys.

Hey.

What, me?

Okay. Uh, never have I ever eaten sushi.

Uh...

Oh, fuck this.

No, no. Wait.

Wait. Wait. Wait.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

You don't know how sorry I am.

When did you sleep with him?

Was it before or after you slept with me?

I fucked up, okay?

I really... I fucked up.

What happened to you, Kate?

I hate you.

You're not making any fucking sense!

Stop! Stop!

Look at me. Stop. Hey, hey.

Hey. Hey.

You're okay.

Stop.

Wha...

Yeah. Uh...

i-it's really great to see you.

It's been a long time. I-I know.

Hey!

Stop. Michael.

Stop.

It's... Stop. It's all right. Please.

Enough with the fucking gun.

All right, stop.

Come here.

Everybody just back up.

Hey, hey, hey. Come here, okay?

We just go inside.

You've gotta stop.

Okay, stop.

Ryan, just stop!

What? What?

You've been enabling him this whole time.

Are you fucking joking?

- No. - Oh, my God.

You helped create this whole fucking mess!

Not you, okay? The situation.

It's not you.

- Look at him. - I see him.

- Just look at him. - Please stop. Please.

Come on.

Just stop!

I'm...

Mikey, I-I'm sorry.

I-I didn't mean for this to happen.

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