Original subtitles

Hey. Come on, get away from that car.

Come on, come on! Beat it.

Creeps.

- Hey, Eddie! - What do you want, Mr. Green?

What do I want? I'll tell you what I want. I want you to get a broom...

...and bash anybody who gets near my chariot, all right?

- Those punks again? - Give me the passkey.

I gotta rouse Sleeping Beauty upstairs.

Remember, they get near it, bash them.

Those no-good little bastards.

Ray! Ray! Come on. Come on, get your ass out of that sack.

Come on, come on, up and at them.

Hey, the day's half over. Let's go, let's go.

Raymond, time is money. Hey, hey.

Why don't you answer the box?

I left a half a dozen messages yesterday.

You think I got nothing better to do than ring you all day?

Raymond, we've got business to talk over.

- We got a summons from your wife. - Ex.

- Ex-wife. - One thousand dollars a month.

One, zero, zero, zero.

On top of that bad news, there's more bad news.

The first chapters of your novel have been returned by another publisher.

- That's only the fourth one. - It's the sixth, but who's counting.

The point is, there's no advance.

If you finish, we'll be able to sell it.

But that's not gonna happen today, right?

Hey, come on, you mothers, get away from that car.

- Up yours! - Son of a bitch.

All right, now for the good news.

- You got an offer of employment. - Not interested.

- You better be, buster. - Abner Procane, male, white, 65 years old.

Extremely wealthy, eccentric, lives on an estate in Holmby Hills.

He's had something stolen.

The thieves offered to return it for a potful of money.

You function strictly as a go-between.

- For which I'll get paid? - Ten thousand, cold cash.

And if we can finagle it a little bit, possibly even tax-free.

- Do I have to murder anybody? - As your lawyer, I would advise against it.

Look.

Please, your appointment's at 2:00. Be prompt for a change, huh?

I don't know why I feel this affection for you.

I mean, you sleep late, you don't pay me. I don't understand it.

St. Ives here.

What are the odds on the Rams-Dallas game?

Okay, 500.

Yeah, Rams.

- and the Cowboys call time. A play came in from the sidelines.

Staubach didn't like it, so he'll go talk it over with Tom Landry.

With the timeout, 8: 14 remaining before intermission...

... with the score: Dallas 7, Rams nothing.

Ray St. Ives for Abner Procane.

Timeout, 8: 10 left in the second quarter. Dallas 14, the Rams nothing.

Mr. St. Ives.

Please make yourself comfortable. Mr. Procane will be with you directly.

Oh, Mr. St. Ives? Do come in, come in.

That film, The Big Parade, is one of my favorite favorites.

Better days then, Mr. St. Ives.

- You are Mr. St. Ives? - Yes.

- Mr. Procane? - Abner Procane. Can I get you a drink?

- Yes, please. - What will you have?

A whiskey and soda, please.

Has Mr. Green informed you of my problem?

I wanted to hear about it from you.

Five brown leather-bound ledgers, 81/2-by-14...

...were removed from a safe in an upstairs office. A very tidy job.

- When did they contact you? - Friday.

- But he didn't speak with me. - Who talked to him?

I did.

The thief, or the man I spoke to, will call again this afternoon...

...with specific instructions as to the exchange.

He insisted you be here when he called and that you act as a go-between.

- I think that's the expression he used. - This is Janet Whistler.

- What else did he say? - He demanded $ 100,000.

Old money, mixed serial numbers.

How do you know I'm not in business with the thief?

Apart from the fact that you gamble excessively...

...your reputation is flawless.

Yes?

He's here.

St. Ives.

This is St. Ives.

Yes. Yes.

Yes, I got it.

Sounds okay. At a Laundromat, 2 a.m., come alone. It's the usual.

- Where's the money? - It's here.

Do you want me to come with you?

That's not necessary. I'm being well-paid for the risk.

You'll be sure to call us immediately afterwards?

Better than that. I'll be right here at your door.

Is that your Jaguar?

- Yeah, what about it? - The lights are on.

Sweet Jesus Christ! Hold it right there!

Now, don't move.

All right, spread yourself against the wall!

- I'm Detective Deal. He's Oller. - Officer Frann, sir.

- What's going on here, officer? - There's a stiff in the drier.

This guy was standing beside it when I walked in.

Well, you better call the meat wagon.

You, up against the wall.

- Jesus. - You know him, Ollie?

No. I think his neck's broke.

Here. See what's in the bag.

- What's your name? - Ray St. Ives.

- Where do you live? - Hotel Lido, on Wilcox.

Look at that. A whole pisspot full of money here.

- How much is in there? - I don't know. I ain't counted it.

- Well, count it. - There's 100,000.

What do you do?

- Retired. - Oh, yeah?

- Did you twist that guy's neck? - No.

Is that your money?

Well, let's just say I'm keeping it for somebody.

On my way home, I was driving past this all-night Laundromat.

We don't have one where I live, so I thought I'd drop in and have a look around.

I just walked in when the motorcycle cop showed up.

You always carry a hundred grand on evening drives?

A friend of mine, a little old lady, asked me to hang on to it.

You know, the banks are closed. She lives alone.

No record, huh? Okay, thanks.

You're entitled to call your lawyer if you want.

Why do I need a lawyer? You're asking questions, I'm answering.

Hello, Robbery? This is Detective Oller down at Homicide Central.

You guys have any big heists tonight, like maybe 100,000 bucks?

Okay, thanks.

No record, no robbery.

Jack Boykins, male, white, 43. Arrested 16 times, mostly for stealing.

Indicted eight times. Convicted twice. Did nine years in Folsom.

- Hey. - Hi, Charlie.

- How are you? - You know this guy, lieutenant?

What do you mean? Everybody knows St. Ives.

He's a bigtime columnist. Crime reporter.

Was, I mean. Now he's an author. He's writing a book.

How's the book coming?

- Not worth a shit. - Maybe you got a weak story.

- Yeah, I guess so. - Hey.

Found him walking around with 100,000 bucks in a bag.

- You didn't steal it, did you, Ray? - No, and I'm not that hard up.

Give him back his 100,000 bucks. Let him get out of here.

- See you later, Ray. - Thanks, Charlie.

- Aren't you gonna count it? - What for?

You wouldn't steal from a little old lady, would you?

Hey, Eddie, up and at them, up and at them.

- Time is money... - St. Ives.

...like Myron's always saying.

l... I must've dozed off.

- What can I do for you? - Put this in the safe...

...then give me the key.

There's nothing in the safe.

- I guess it's all right to give you the key. - Put that in.

This is St. Ives. The exchange, it got fouled up.

I'll talk to you about it later.

No, no, no. I'm gonna lock it up in a safe place.

Now lock it.

Give me the key.

Now go back to sleep.

I'd like to get even for yesterday.

Tonight, Vikings over the Colts.

No, not 500. Make it 50.

Thank God for Monday Night Football.

Mr. Procane sent me to find out what went wrong.

- All he had to do was call. - Oh, I asked him to send me.

Well, in that case, come on in.

- Like some coffee? - Fine.

Now, about last night.

I met up with a small-time thief named Boykins, in the Laundromat.

Someone you know?

Past tense.

When I saw him, he was bouncing around inside a drier with his head on backwards.

That's chicory coffee. Takes getting used to.

You can say that again.

If you're gonna sit there, I'll make the bed.

No, no. I like beds that have already been slept in. They're warmer.

I don't think you understand about Boykins. Or maybe I didn't make myself clear.

He was dead.

Was that all there was to it?

Maybe for you...

...but it was of some importance to Boykins.

We had another call this morning.

Another voice wanting ransom for the ledgers.

He also wanted you to act as a go-between.

He said he'd call tonight at 9:00 with instructions.

I'll be there.

Do you always live like this?

- In cheap hotels? - Yeah.

By choice?

Why else would anybody live in a cheap hotel?

- You don't like me, do you? - I don't like your questions.

As for you...

...you're tough, smart...

...and you've got a lot of great-looking bits and pieces.

I wondered when you'd notice.

It's a little early for me to notice.

Mornings are for getting over the nights.

You should come around in the afternoon.

- Well... - See you at 9:00.

Are you throwing me out?

No man in his right mind would throw you out.

It's just that afternoons are better.

- Afternoons are perfect. - I'll remember that.

Hey, Ray, what do you say?

- Hesh. - How about a little corned beef today?

Sounds good to me, but no fat. Give mine to Angie.

Boykins got his ticket punched last night.

- Yeah, that's right. - You was there.

- You got busted. - Come on over and sit down.

Hey, Rudy. Take over for a minute, will you?

Seen Boykins the last couple of days?

Yeah, he was in two nights ago with... what's-his-name.

That guy who always looks like death warmed over.

- Finley? - Yeah, that's the creep.

Two of them had their heads together for hours. Last time I saw Boykins.

- What time does Finley come around? - He comes in late, around 10:00.

Gary, get a mop and get out here! Where are you?

Hey, what's the matter with you?

You all right, lady?

- Hi, Ray, what's going on? - Hey, Seymour.

Nothing much. Sit down, sit down.

How's the book coming?

Gary, will you get out here with that mop?

Hey, Seymour.

You know a vest called Abner Procane, lives in Holmby Hills?

You want me to ask around?

Yeah, but quietly.

I got a car in the parking lot.

- I'm going this way. - Good night.

Good night, now.

- Well, you two dance well together. - Feel it?

Inside.

Twenty, 40, 50...

Fifty lousy bucks!

You ain't got no money, you pay with your ass!

You got the $50 for five minutes' work.

That adds up to $600 an hour. That's a lot of money.

What are you, some kind of wiseass?

Who put you nice, clean-cut boys up to this?

- Who do you work for? - You know, you talk too much!

We're gonna take you out, go-between.

Shit!

Cut him off!

- Mr. St. Ives. Just a moment, sir. - I know my way.

Mr. Procane has given explicit instructions that he's not to be dist...

Quiet, please, quiet.

- What is it? - This man insists on seeing Mr. Procane.

Mr. Procane can't be disturbed now.

- May I be of any assistance? - Who are you?

Properly I should ask that question. Who are you?

Mr. St. Ives. We're expecting him.

- Thank you, Horace. - Mr. St. Ives.

You're the man helping Abner regain his journals.

Yeah, something like that.

- Dr. Constable. - Do you mind waiting a few moments?

Abner's just on the last reel of Birth of a Nation.

What happened to you?

- Are you hurt? - No, not very much.

Show me your hand.

Please, Mr. St. Ives, please. Don't worry.

I was an MD before I became a psychiatrist.

Friction burn.

Come with me.

Why don't you wash your hand, Mr. St. Ives.

- Janet, could you get me some scissors? - In the drawer.

Yes, here are the scissors.

And now I need some gauze and a mild astringent.

Mild astringent. Mild astringent. Mild astringent...

Mild astringent.

Why don't you sit down, Mr. St. Ives.

Yes?

No, this is Procane.

Shall I or shall I not ask you how you came by these burns?

I missed the elevator and had to slide down.

Such impatience.

Now, this will sting a little.

Where did you say?

Yes, I'll give him the message.

What is this with Procane and the old movies?

Films really are dreams...

...especially old movies, and Abner loves them.

They're good dreams for Abner.

They're splendid, splendid therapy.

You can remove this bandage tomorrow, if you like.

I see you two have met.

Mr. St. Ives. A message.

Union Station, Wednesday, 10 a. m...

...men's room, first stall.

You're to bring the same Pan Am bag as before.

First it was a Laundromat, now a men's toilet.

Classy bunch of crooks. No imagination.

Or appreciation.

You've had an accident?

Goes with the territory.

Hey, where's Parisi?

- Who? - Johnny Parisi.

Tell him it's Ray St. Ives.

I don't know him.

I'll wait.

St. Ives.

Hi, Ray.

Come on in. I wanna show you something.

Looks just like any other car on the street.

Get in. I got a surprise.

The boys are real artists, aren't they?

Quarter-inch armor throughout. Quartz-glass windshield.

- Expensive? - Ray.

How can you put a price on personal safety?

I had to test it anyway.

You're right.

Personal safety's very important.

What's on your mind, Ray?

Stolen journals.

Who stole them? Who's got them?

Why are they so valuable?

And why is someone dead?

Maybe Albee Shippo can help.

Are you involved?

If I were, we wouldn't be talking.

- You called? - Yeah.

Come on in.

Like I said on the telephone, I don't do retail.

Everything here is strictly high-class art.

For instance, you wanna go into business for yourself...

...something you can do from your own home, I'm your man.

I'm interested in journals. Jack Boykins.

Wait a second. Wait a second.

Boykins was a thief! I had nothing to do with him.

- Who are you anyway? - I'm investigating the murder of Boykins.

- You're a cop. - Before Boykins was murdered, he said...

I don't care what he said!

Some guy runs off at the mouth. He gets bumped off.

Suddenly, an innocent man's in the shit house.

All right.

But if you can help me out...

Look, all I know is, some guy calls up...

...to see if I'm interested in journals. I said, no.

- Did you talk to anybody else after that? - Nobody!

Every time something happens, you cops jump on me!

This guy that called, what's his name?

Finley Cummings.

Finley Cummings.

Cummings wanted to know if I knew anybody interested in some journals...

...belonging to some guy living out in West L.A.

You remember anything else, give me a buzz.

- Sure, sure. - Ray St. Ives, Hotel Lido. Thanks again.

Hotel Lido. Hotel Lido.

You son of a bitch, you're no cop!

What did they do, put the precinct in the hotel?

I'm running a business here!

- What will it be, pal? - Give him some of that, Hesh.

The roast beef is very good today.

Relax, I'm paying.

Couple of knocks...

...some of the vegetables. You look tired, Finley.

I think you need some vitamins and minerals.

We almost forgot the beans. Give him some beans. You like beans?

Sure, everybody likes beans. Come on, Hesh, don't be a piker, more beans.

What else you got? Pie.

Give him a big slice of pie. Apple. Apple pie.

There we go. Now for something to drink. Tommy?

Nourishment's very important. We gotta be careful what we put in the old furnace.

- Ain't you hungry? - No, I had a big lunch.

But you go on. Dig in.

Something I wanted to talk to you about.

No, no, go on and eat.

- Just listen. I'll talk. - All right.

Food like that should be eaten hot.

What's on your mind?

Your health.

Go on, eat, please.

I think it's very possible the guy that killed Jack Boykins might try to kill you.

Correct me if I'm wrong.

You and Boykins stole some journals from a guy in West L.A., right?

Drink this. Something's stuck.

- Are you nuts or something? - I couldn't care less.

You and Boykins stole those journals.

You realized how valuable they were...

...and got rid of him to have the whole payoff yourself.

Or maybe after you and Boykins stole the journals, somebody else killed him.

Who told you this? Well, he's a liar.

I mean, Jackie Boykins was a friend of mine.

Where did you hear this?

It wasn't me that did it.

Jimmy Peskoe.

He's an old-time safe guy. He did the job.

He and Boykins?

Alone.

He didn't know what to do with the stuff. He sold it to Boykins.

Where does he live?

Ask Hesh. They're big buddies.

- Oh, yeah, happy birthday. - It's not my birthday.

It's not? What the hell did I buy you dinner for?

Hesh, where does Jimmy Peskoe live?

What do you want him for?

I have to give you my life story for a straight answer?

Hotel Teris.

Hey, Ray, how about that game last night? A 48-yarder with three seconds left.

They should've been that lucky last Sunday. Hey.

What about the guy Procane?

You know Mitchell Danton? When I mentioned the name Procane...

..."Pass," he says.

Thanks.

- You hear anything else, let me know. - Okay.

Jimmy Peskoe.

Never heard of him.

What room is he in?

Eight-nineteen.

Thanks.

Hey, Wally, who's the john?

Captain Kangaroo. Who cares?

Well, fancy meeting you here.

- How'd you get in here? - The door was open.

- You just walked in? - Yeah.

- Then you pushed him out the window? - No. Talk to the hotel clerk...

...or the girl in the lobby. - Oh, yeah.

There was a girl there. She smiled at you.

- Why did you come here? - Business.

- Anything to do with Boykins? - Yeah.

Every time we find a stiff, you're around. Why is that?

I guess I'm just lucky.

Don't be such a wise guy.

What was the connection between Boykins and Peskoe?

He stole something from my client, sold it to Boykins, who offered to sell it back.

You show up at the Laundromat with the dough.

Boykins is dead, and the merchandise is gone.

Now you know everything I do.

Hey, nobody said you could go nowhere.

The lieutenant wants to see you downstairs. Sit down here.

How'd you know that Peskoe was involved?

I asked around.

Then you came over and helped him out the window?

- Because he had what you wanted. - lf Peskoe killed Boykins...

...which I doubt, he would've had the merchandise.

If I pushed him out the window, then I'd have it. Where is it?

I got out of the elevator and I walked over to the desk...

...and I'm rapping with Wally here...

...and the guy takes his dive. I don't see it.

I live on six. He lived on eight.

And the guy who got on the elevator when you stepped off?

What about him?

How long after he got on did the body hit?

Couldn't have been more than a couple of seconds.

- How can you be...? - Why...?

How can you be so sure?

It only takes that long to get from the elevator to the desk.

- Thanks, miss. - You can ask Wally...

- You're off the hook, St. Ives. - What?

Yeah, his story checked. That whore downstairs.

Yeah, well, I don't care what the whore said.

I think you done it.

Jesus Christ, leave the man alone, will you?

And stop calling people whores.

Cops!

Jesus!

Screw.

First, $ 100,000 and a stiff in a Laundromat.

Now a guy squashed on the sidewalk.

What the hell are you doing?

Gathering material for a book.

Some book.

- How many chapters you got? - Six.

- Let me read them sometime. - Be happy to have you read them.

Thanks, Charlie.

Good night, lieutenant.

Mr. St. Ives.

Laundromat. The man in the drier.

- Oh, Officer...? - Frann.

- Well, just hello. - Oh, nice to see you.

- Hey, how did you know I was here? - I called Coles, and Hesh told me.

Show me clear from Sixth and Whitmore.

- Did you see who pushed him? - No.

- Did it have anything to do with the ledgers? - Yeah, I think so.

Your attention, please.

Now arriving on track seven, Pacific Streamliner, city of San Diego.

Passengers will depart through gate three.

Now arriving on track two, Super Chief for Chicago and Salt Lake City.

- Here, I'll save you a whole dime. - No, thanks. I'm waiting for this one.

Hey, fella, a stall's a stall.

See, I got this mental problem. I can't go unless it's the first one.

You've got a real bad problem there, don't you, sonny?

I tried to hurry.

I heard what you said about going only in this first stall.

I'm like that at home, except I can't go on the first floor. I go upstairs.

- We both have a problem. - Yeah.

Your attention, please.

Now boarding on track four...

... the Pacific Limited for Portland and Seattle.

Departure will be in 20 minutes.

Your attention, please. Now boarding on track four...

... the Pacific Limited for Portland and Seattle.

Departure will be in 20 minutes.

The journals.

So this time the connection was completed, Mr. St. Ives?

There they are. All five, 81/2-by-14, leather-bound.

He's read them.

Your life in crime, Mr. Procane, is fascinating.

"Exhilarating" is a better word.

Isn't it dangerous writing it down like that, as well as expensive?

Abner has worked for years in combinatorics and functional analysis.

He's totally dependant on writing.

He must keep a record.

It's compulsive.

Well, Mr. Procane.

There are four pages of your compulsion missing from those journals.

Relax, Abner. Relax. Come, please sit down.

Sit down, sit down. Sit down.

Close your eyes. Close your eyes. Think of something beautiful.

Never say things so bluntly. You might cause someone his heart attack.

Here, there's a tension right there. Right there.

No, no, no. Please, no.

They are missing.

The devil.

- The very devil! - It's all right.

But we still have to pay Mr. St. Ives his fee.

I'm afraid 10,000 won't be enough. I'll want something else.

Ten thousand? I think it's time for me to go.

- I insist that you stay. - Look, Abner, really, I have a cold.

I don't wanna get involved with your business. I'm not your lawyer.

- I may need you! - Abner, we have been through this before.

I don't want to be an accessory or a witness to any of your schemes.

Mr. St. Ives may wish to involve himself, but I do not.

Abner, dear. Janet, darling. I love you.

What do you want?

I'd like to get a look at those missing pages.

That's your dangerous compulsion.

I read your journals. You've never committed murder.

Not even a violent act.

Perish the thought.

Although, now I'm not so certain of the situation.

For the first time, there might be violence.

I can always duck.

Janet, welcome Mr. St. Ives as a new player to our game.

Ten thousand.

- Could I have a pineapple? - Yes, ma'am.

Place your bets, please.

Now, this last little caper of mine...

...is the simplest of all, Mr. St. Ives.

International Electronics is bribing the Arabs to buy their product.

My plan was to intercept the bribe money.

That plan was written on those last four pages of my journal...

...but please be assured, there has never been any gratuitous violence...

... in any of our encounters.

The result of detailed planning and meticulous execution.

Thank you, my dear.

However, the fact that those four pages are missing...

... means that the killer of Peskoe and Boykins...

May drop by on Friday night at our local drive-in for more than popcorn.

If you were in the drive-in with us...

...the risk would be reduced to an acceptable level.

Still in the game, Mr. St. Ives?

Yes, I'll hang around a while.

What's special about them?

They are the reason I brought you here tonight.

The one in the middle is Sheik Amani.

On his right is George McDuff, president of International Electronics.

On the other side is Marsh Chasman...

...vice president and controller.

They're discussing the service charge that International is willing to advance...

...to secure a contract of well over 100 million dollars.

They're the principals in the four missing pages.

How much will the charge be?

That is what they're negotiating at this moment.

But you may rest assured it'll be a very considerable figure.

A minimum of 4 million.

And this money will change hands at the drive-in Friday night.

Well, you must excuse me.

It's past my bedtime.

I'm sure Mr. St. Ives will take very good care of you, my dear.

- Which one is the inside man? - Chasman.

- Cost much? - Not very much.

You might say he was a bargain.

You are a very lucky hot dog.

Yeah, why is it when I win, I'm lucky, and when I lose, I'm stupid?

Forty-eight-yard field goal with three seconds left ain't lucky?

Hey, what about the paper?

I'll bring it back after I read it.

Mr. St. Ives?

Officer Frann.

You look different in civvies.

- Can I sit down? - Sit, sit.

I'm on my day off.

Oh, I thought maybe you might've been promoted.

- Oh, I'd like to be. - Well, that's nice. I wish you a lot of luck.

- I've got a friend down at Homicide. - What about him?

He let me look at the statement you gave to Oller and Deal.

- So? - It got me to thinking...

...that maybe you knew more about Boykins than you told them.

You trying to bust this case all by yourself?

That's right. I've never had a murder one on my beat.

Well, I'm glad things are picking up.

It can give me a chance to show what I can do.

Sound like you're trying to make detective.

Well, I don't wanna stay on motors.

- Think I can help? - Yesterday at Union Station...

...you entered the men's room...

...with a Pan Am flight bag containing $ 100,000.

A few minutes later, you walked out with a United flight bag...

...containing journals stolen from Abner Procane.

Jesus.

You've been a busy boy.

I believe Procane would pay for certain information.

- For example? - Who killed Peskoe and Boykins.

Why should he care? He got back the journals.

So far, two men have died...

...and $ 100,000 has exchanged hands for those journals.

My guess is you don't know what's in them.

But I do know who had them for three days.

- How much? - Twenty thousand dollars, cash.

You could end up like Boykins and Peskoe.

When can I have an answer?

He's meeting me at my hotel in an hour's time.

The question is, is the identification of the opposition worth $20,000 to you?

A peek at the other man's cards?

That's always worth an investment.

By all means, yes.

Janet, get the cash for Mr. St. Ives, please.

Now, let me give you a preview of our little play.

First scene, the drive-in theater.

Time, 7 p.m. tomorrow night.

- What's the movie? - Western double bill.

The switch coincides with the finest Hollywood stampede.

Oh, great, great. I hope it's good. In case we have nothing else to do.

Twenty thousand dollars. And now, gentlemen, if you don't mind, good night.

- You have a big night? - Cocktail party in Bel Air.

Then dinner in a beautiful restaurant.

- Good night. - Good night.

Nice bit, that, Mr. St. Ives, yes?

I wouldn't characterize her as a bit.

No, perhaps not. How would "dangerous" do?

I'm not that familiar with the lady.

I am.

Now, with you at the wheel of my car, we park here.

That's the exact spot.

Frann, Frann, who stabbed you?

Frann, Frann, who stabbed you?

Frann, Frann, who stabbed you?

- Hey, come on, get the hell out of the way. - All right.

- Thank you. - Right.

- Hello, St. Ives. - Hi.

- Is he still alive? - I don't know.

Lieutenant...

- Okay, thank you. - See you guys later.

Tell me, what was Officer Frann doing outside your hotel?

He was there to meet with me.

Well, what did he want?

Yesterday he saw me at the Union Station...

...where I was exchanging $ 100,000 for merchandise belonging to my client.

If he saw you at the station, he could've seen the guy you gave the money to.

- Maybe so. - Detective Oller.

- Yeah? - Telephone.

Excuse me.

Well, you know, according to Patrolman Bancroft's report here...

...it says that Officer Frann was seen talking to you as they were wheeling him in.

Yeah, but you couldn't understand a word he was saying. He was fading fast.

Lab report on the car. Negative.

Is there anything else you can tell us?

I found him, drove him here. That's all.

You know, so far, everybody connected with the stolen journals is dead.

- Who said anything about stolen journals? - Oh, come on, St. Ives.

Give us credit for some smarts.

- You know, you're the only one left. - I'm always careful.

Always careful.

- Any of you wanna talk to Dr. Winston? - How is Officer Frann?

- He just died. - Did he say anything?

If you have questions, ask Dr. Winston. He's available, but not for long.

He's got another operation in four minutes.

Need a lift?

- Hey, Charlie, what are you doing here? - I'm waiting for you.

You working on a new chapter for your book?

Look, I do need a ride home, but don't ask any questions.

Too many questions for the night.

Sure. We can just count out-of-state license plates.

That's a cruel thing to do to a cop. No questions.

- I'm clean, Charlie. - Maybe.

But you're pushing a bucket of shit around with a short stick.

That's a nice figure of speech.

And you could fall in the bucket, easy. Just like me.

- You, Charlie? I don't believe it. - Oh, teeter-totter, buddy. Teeter-totter.

I've thought about it, and so have you.

Like when you hustled crime exposures for the newspaper.

Expos�s.

Yeah. Well, the right kind of payoff here and there...

...and some stories might not have appeared.

You're right. I have thought about it, but if I fall in, I'll let you know.

Don't wait too long.

If you're in up to your ears, I might not be able to pull you out.

I'd depend on you, Charlie, anytime.

Yes?

You're in early from a big night out.

I have to get some rest for tomorrow.

- Where's Mr. Procane? He with you? - Not with me, no.

But I'll connect you.

- What is it? - It's St. Ives.

Yes, Mr. St. Ives. You have the information?

It didn't work out. I'll return the 20,000 tomorrow.

Good night.

St. Ives...

...can I help you?

That's all right. Go back to sleep.

Pistol in the fifth. You think he's ready to go?

I don't know about him, but I am. Give me my keys.

- Do you dream much, Mr. St. Ives? - Yes, I do.

Of course. Only stupid people don't dream.

Do you have good dreams?

- No. - Neither do I.

- You sure you won't have more coffee? - No, thanks.

I dream always of dying.

I dream mostly of being hungry.

- Were you ever hungry? - Now and then, yeah.

I've never been hungry, so how can I dream of that?

But then I've never died either.

So why should I dream of dying?

Dr. Constable explains it quite easily:

"Fear of impotence," he says.

Now, I can't quite make that connection.

Besides, I've always been impotent, so why should I fear it?

You know, Mr. St. Ives, I'm truly pleased that you blackmailed me.

That's what it was, wasn't it? Blackmailed into taking you into this...

...new venture of mine.

We could be friends, you know.

What makes you think so?

Because we're both essentially so very honest.

And now we must rest.

We leave promptly at 6:30.

Let me show you to the guest room.

It's afternoon.

You know something?

You're all right.

- Did you have any doubts? - That's what it's like these days.

You're all right.

Now that I've got you on my side, I have a question.

Go right ahead.

Briefly, your connection with Procane.

Well, I used to be a cop.

Nowhere, no time, did a cop ever look like you.

I was a special kind of cop.

That's how I met Procane.

And he made you a better offer, huh?

Yeah. That's it.

Briefly.

- Hello. - Everything's set.

We'll check the money, then it's on its way to the drive-in.

Wonderful.

I can't decide whether I'm feeling apprehension or anticipation.

- Perhaps a little of both. - You look nervous to me.

- Nonsense. He loves cloak-and-dagger stuff. - I really do.

Misterioso rigmarole.

Keeps you young!

Okay, my dear.

Nine-millimeter Oberndorfer. Really excellent.

- No, thanks. - Worried?

The usual nightmare, an early death after a long life in prison.

But we're a public company.

- lf our shareholders ever get ahold... - Relax. Times change.

You just worry about the cost overage on QT-20.

- Well, just be goddamn careful. - I've hired the best in the business.

- What's his name again? - Kluszewski.

- Wasn't he involved in Watergate? - No, that was Ulasciewicz.

All this Mickey Mouse cops and robbers.

- Why can't we just meet in a hotel? - Because this is the way they do things.

Here goes.

Time to go.

Pull in here.

There's Kluszewski, the moneyman.

In about 30 seconds, a blue Ford will park next to the moneyman's car.

That is the Arab go-between.

Now we wait until whoever took the plans steals the money.

Face masks.

They're following the plan exactly.

They're a little off. I allowed 25 seconds.

They took 45.

Get out!

Get out. Out.

Come on, the bag!

Let's have the bag over here.

Come on, the bag.

Let's see who they are.

That's Carl Oller and Frank Deal.

- The two cops? - Yeah.

We're almost a minute behind schedule.

Let's get out of here.

Let's all have a drink.

Mr. St. Ives, would you like to spend the night?

That's all right with me.

How did you know it was Oller and Deal?

Little things.

What little things?

Well, at the Laundromat, it wasn't just coincidence.

What?

Them dropping by like that.

That could happen.

- There was something else. - What?

The second phone call...

...the one that set up the exchange at Union Station.

The instructions were to use the same Pan Am bag.

Now how did he know it was a Pan Am bag unless he had seen it?

Who saw it? Oller and Deal.

What about the safecracker?

Peskoe? They killed him too.

They were on the scene too damn fast, just like at the Laundromat.

Then they killed the officer you were about to pay $20,000 to...

...for their names.

- Yes? - No.

- No? - No.

After I took Frann to the hospital, I called Deal.

He lives way over in Chatsworth. Oller was with him.

There's no way they could have killed Frann...

...driven to Chatsworth in time to answer my phone call.

That's devilish, Mr. St. Ives.

Then who did do poor Officer Frann in?

I don't know.

Who's there? Who's there?

Who is it?

John?

John?

Yes, Abner.

That's a very theatrical entrance.

What on earth are you doing there?

And what are you doing with that gun?

I'm going to kill you, Abner.

For this money?

For that money.

Old fellow, you can have the money.

Four million dollars, and it's all yours.

You don't need to kill me.

I must, Abner. I know how your mind works.

There would be no way to e...

Escape.

Sorry. My cold got worse.

- You too, Janet? - There's no other way.

Mr. St. Ives, are you in this with them?

I'm afraid I'm going down the tubes with you.

I'm sorry. I really am.

Poor little Janet here. What were you going to give her for her loyal support?

Not even 10 percent.

And I, what have I been paid all these years to listen to your mewling little troubles?

Your mewling little troubles drove me mad!

For nights, for hours, I had to listen to them.

And what did you pay me?

Compared to the millions you stack in your Swiss bank accounts...

...I have been paid in pennies.

I had no idea. I thought, John, I really believed...

That we were friends?

God knows I loved you, Abner.

And God knows I admired your devious intellect.

But this obsession of yours with money...

And that you always took other people to do the job for you...

...and then you did the job to them.

So I said to myself suddenly one night:

"Why him? Why not me?

Why don't I do the job to him?"

It was a Freudian revelation, Abner.

God knows I loved you.

But God knows I hate you now.

I caught your bullet!

You're just delaying matters, Mr. St. Ives.

Come out, Mr. St. Ives.

Come out.

There's no point in prolonging this, Mr. St. Ives.

No point at all. Come out.

St. Ives, it really didn't have to finish this way.

I'd much rather be partners with you than Dr. Constable.

It's really worked out beautifully. All that money and us.

I couldn't kill you, just as you couldn't kill me.

No, but Charlie could.

What the hell kept you, Charlie?

I had to break a goddamn window to get in the house.

You were supposed to leave the door unlatched.

Better put cuffs on that one.

We might have been good friends, Mr. St. Ives.

How disappointing.

Charlie, that's Procane.

He had a bad dream that came true.

The guy in the pool was his psychiatrist, named Constable.

Constable tried to trade him in for 4 million dollars.

Now, that one, did you know she was a cop?

Used to be a cop.

She's the one that stuck the ice pick in Frann, also for the 4 million.

That's the 4 million there, huh?

You never told me who that money belongs to.

Why, Charlie, it belongs to you if you want it.

The people it really belongs to would never admit they had ever seen it.

Why don't you take it?

Ah, Charlie.

It's expensive being honest.

It sure as shit is.

Look at that. Did you ever see a cop crying?

Sure, lots of times. Tears as big as raindrops.

Wow, Charlie, can I use that dialogue?

Be my guest.

- Officer? - Yes, ma'am?

Before you call the station, would you help me get off my wet things?

Good luck, Charlie.

Hey!

Hey, that's my car!

You can't steal my car. I'm a cop.

Oh, my God!

Shit!

Freeze!

OK! OK, you've got me.

Enjoying yourself, pervert?

Jesus, would you take it easy, Dick Tracy?

Move.

- Can I just ask you one question? - Yeah. What?

How come all cops have two-inch peckers?

Damn.

Yeah?

What time is it?

Where?

Yeah. I'll meet you there. OK, OK. I'll meet you there.

Jeez.

I like that wrinkled look. It's very sexy.

Next time go the whole way. Ask for less starch.

I had a hard night.

Don't talk to me about hard till you spend a night with Charlene. Total nympho.

She couldn't keep her hands off me. I was so sore, I thought it would fall off.

Jesus, Art, I don't wanna hear about your sex life.

- My head's killing me. - Too much firewater last night?

- You've been hitting it a little strong. - I've got everything under control, OK?

- What have we got here? - Her name's Teri Kaplan.

Teri Kaplan. Teri Kaplan?

- One of Anthony Vincenzo's girls? - That's her.

Hey, Sergeant. Think I've found something.

Give me a stick or a pen or something.

Anthony Alberto Vincenzo.

- Hey, Frank. How's the cocaine business? - I wouldn't know.

That's right. You're not a drug dealer, you're an importer.

And your brother's not a scum-sucking pimp. He's a talent agent.

This is my mother. Don't talk that way in front of my mother.

- Who the hell do you think you are? - I'll tell you.

I'm the man who's gonna arrest your brother for murder.

Haven't seen him.

When you do, tell him the smart thing to do is turn himself in.

This time we got him by the balls.

I'm sorry. I don't mean balls. I mean chandeliers.

We have him by the chandeliers.

You're interrupting our meal. Beat it.

Murphy. Let me ask you. You ever hear of Murphy's Law?

If anything can possibly go wrong, it will.

A lot of things could happen to you. You could get run over by a truck.

Your gas heater could blow up or you could lose a wheel on the freeway.

You gotta remember that.

The only law I know is Jack Murphy's Law.

That's very simple.

Don't fuck with Jack Murphy. You remember that.

Continental Coach Lines number 28 arriving ramp 16.

Ventura, Santa Paula, and Oxnard.

�ltima llamada. Continental Coach Lines servicio directo para San Francisco

sale de la salida n�mero siete.

Atenci�n, por favor.

El Sunliner Express destinaci�n San Diego

sale en 30 minutos de la salida n�mero cinco.

Attention, please. The Sunliner Express to San Diego

departs in 30 minutes from ramp five.

Mr Cameron?

Howdy.

- Where are the addresses? - Right here.

Had a little trouble with one of them. Ben Wilcove.

Seems he retired a few years ago,

moved up into the mountains a-ways.

Wasn't easy to find.

- But you found him? - Oh, yeah.

But like I say, it took a bit longer than I figured.

Uh, I'm gonna have to charge you a little more than we originally agreed on.

How much more?

With expenses and everything, let's say another two grand.

Go to hell.

Miss Freeman.

Miss Freeman.

Hey, do you want these addresses or not?

You can go to somebody else if you wanna.

But if these people were to find out you was looking for them,

I wonder how they'd feel about that.

You really are a slime, aren't ya?

No, ma'am. Just a private investigator.

Of course, some people would say that's the same thing.

All right. $2,000.

That'll be cash on delivery, if you don't mind.

- How about traveller's cheques? - That'd be all right.

Well, since you put it that way,

I guess we can forget about the extra expenses and all and just call it even.

- Nice doing business with you, ma'am. - Move a hair and I'll blow your head off.

Now, wait a minute. You can have my wallet.

- There's almost $100 in it. - I don't want your money.

All I want is for you to say "Ah".

- What do you mean? - You know. Like in a doctor's office.

- Do it. - Ah.

You can do better than that.

Make it bigger. Ahhh.

Ah-ah-ah-ah.

Perfect.

Hello.

- Jack Murphy? - Yeah.

Hello.

Hello? What the hell is this? Some kind of game?

Yes. And the game is just beginning.

I'm gonna kill you.

But first I'm gonna put you through hell.

Marie?

I thought her name was Charlene.

Charlene's history. Marie's the future.

Incredible imagination. I've been a cop 18 years. She knows words I've never heard.

Say, Murph. I like your tie. Specially the stains.

Looks like the sewer backed up again.

I was at Madame Tong's the other night. Saw your wife. Nice tits.

- Hey, lay it down. - Taste as good as they look?

Break it up, goddammit! Stop it!

- Ease up. - What the hell's wrong with you two?

Murphy! My office, now.

Let's go clean up.

- What was that all about? - It's something personal.

I don't understand you. Look at you. You're a mess.

You look like you just got out of that drunk tank.

You think you're the only man whose wife ever left him?

Over three quarters of the cops in the police force are divorced.

Maybe you think you can hide in a bottle?

You better get your act together, Jack, or you're gonna lose everything you got.

Ah.

Get the hell outta here.

Bingo. That was airport security.

A man matching Tony Vincenzo's description bought a ticket for Vegas.

His plane leaves in 20 minutes.

Attention, please. International Airlines flight 643 to Las Vegas

has been delayed 30 minutes.

Southwest Airlines flight 702...

Hold it!

Stay away from me or I'll blow her head off!

- Get back! Get back! - Freeze!

Get back! Get back!

Move it! I said move! Move it!

Move it! All right!

Tony!

- Watch it! - Somebody call it in?

- What happened here? - It's all under control.

- Over here! - This way, Sergeant!

Bambino!

Mamma. Mamma, the car's waiting.

He was a good boy.

A decent boy.

Your brother is dead.

- What are you gonna do about it? - I'll take care of it, Mamma.

I want that bastard cop dead. Do you hear me?

I want him crucified.

All right, fellas, put your hands together...

Yeah!

Over here! Over here! Yeah!

Next up on the stage, fellas, is a girl you're really gonna love.

Put your hands together and welcome Philly Flash.

Hi.

You got the notice?

Yeah.

- So now it's official? - I tried to call you.

Your phone's been disconnected.

I moved. I'm living with Carl. He's the manager of the club.

Jan, what are you doing here?

- Don't start. - Why do you work in a dump like this?

- I'm a dancer. - You call that dancing?

Yes. If you don't like it, don't come around.

$5.40.

Watch it, snot-rag!

Hey!

You can't come in here!

Come on out or I'll put a bullet through the door.

OK! OK, I'm coming.

Go ahead, camel-crotch. Shoot me.

Don't tempt me.

Ow! God, you snot-licking donkey fart!

- Get up. - I think I hurt my back.

Poor girl. Let me help you.

You stupid... Ow!

Jissom-breath. Scrotum-cheeks.

Bug-sucking booger.

You're gonna regret this.

Dinosaur dork.

Fuckbrains.

Hey. I wanna file a complaint against this scumbag cop here. Police brutality.

He assaulted me for no reason and then he tried to rape me.

Sounds like you got yourself a real live one.

Suck a doorknob, you homo.

She got any ID?

Get your hands off me, faggot!

Get this. Arabella.

- Arabella McGee. - Arabella.

- Cute. - Sit on it, slimeball.

- Have a nice day, Arabella. - Eat it, toe-jam. Monkey-vomit!

The dancing never stops here at Madame Tong's.

Let's put our hands together and welcome the sparkling, vivacious...

- Back again? - Yeah. Slumming.

Why don't you just go home and leave me alone?

I'm tired of you following me, spying on me.

You know what you look like up there? You look like a whore.

- You bastard! - OK, that's enough, now.

You got a problem? You're bothering my employees. Go and sleep it off.

Up there you look like a whore.

And your boyfriend here looks like a pimp.

- Sir, you observed the vehicle? - Yeah.

It was a grey Oldsmobile. Pretty new.

Maybe an '83 or an '84. Oh, the licence plate number.

It was 082 UCK.

- What the hell are you guys doing here? - You're under arrest, smart guy.

A dozen witnesses saw you arguing with your wife at Madame Tong's tonight.

And a witness saw you driving away from the scene of the shooting.

Ever occur to you that someone's trying to frame me?

Know what I think?

I think your wife left you, started dancing at a topless club,

showing off all her goodies to a bunch of horny lowlifes, and you hated it.

When you found out she was with someone else, you killed them.

Why don't you crawl back under your rock?

Come on, Jack. Come on. Let's face it. She was a slut.

It wasn't the first time you caught her in bed with somebody else.

How many guys was it then? Two? I'm surprised you didn't knock her off then.

Unless you enjoyed it.

Did you watch her doing it?

You know, Ed, I've been wondering something about you for a long time.

Why is it you never married? Never even saw you with a girl.

Is it because you're so ugly and because you have bad breath?

A lot of guys have bad breath, but they also have girls.

Maybe you don't like girls, huh?

And maybe that's why you two boys spend so much time together.

Whaddya know?

Ballistics identified your gun as the murder weapon.

You're going to jail, Jack. You know what happens to a cop in jail? Huh?

You're dead meat, pal. Dead meat.

Your arraignment is tomorrow. The DA'll probably go for second-degree.

But since you'd been drinking, we can make a case for diminished capacity.

Say you plead guilty to voluntary manslaughter.

We're talking maybe eight years,

which means you should be out in three to four.

Did it ever cross your mind that I'm innocent?

Frankly, no.

Sit down.

Must be your lucky day.

Well, if it isn't Sergeant Dickbrain.

I heard they arrested a cop. What did you do, rape a nun?

Listen, you're gonna have a great time in San Quentin cos they just love cops.

So how do you like lockup?

- Find yourself a girlfriend yet, hm? - Kiss my squirrel.

Come on, admit it. You're a dyke, right?

- Go jump a flagpole. - You know, I'm a cop.

I know everything that happens in women's detention.

Maybe the first time they hold you down, but you get to like it...

Kiss my pantihose, sperm bank.

I bet your girlfriend does that and you love it.

You fucking bastard!

Hey, you two, knock it off over there!

Come on, break it up! Break it up!

Come on, break it up! Break it up!

- What the hell are you doing? - Do what I tell you.

Get the keys out of the door. Quick! Come on!

You! Don't make a sound or I'll kill her.

Drop your gun and keys on the floor. Quick!

Come on! Come on! Hurry it!

Get in that cell.

Hurry it! Hurry it! Lock it.

Come on. Come on.

Help! Escaped prisoner! Help!

This is crazy. You'll get us both killed.

- You're never gonna get outta here. - Not by the front door, I won't.

The elevator.

Escaped prisoners in the elevator on their way down.

Why don't you just put the gun down?

You seem like a decent enough guy. You're just having an off day.

Besides, you don't wanna kill me. I'm actually a very nice person. I really am.

We got off on the wrong foot with me stealing your car, but that was a mistake.

By the way, you've got excellent taste in cars.

- Don't you ever shut up? - Go screw yourself, mutant.

- Watch your mouth. - Watch your asshole, asshole.

What is the matter with you guys up there? Can't keep a guy in lockup?

- What's going on? - Murphy's got a gun and a hostage.

Shit. They must have gotten off on another floor. Let's go.

That's it. I quit. I'm tired of you pushing me around, booger-bits. If you...

You can make this hard or make it easy. Which is it gonna be?

- OK. - I don't hear you.

- OK. - You were saying?

I said OK, you snot-sucking garbage dump.

A helicopter? Are you crazy?

- I was a crew chief on one during the war. - What the hell does that mean?

It means I can fly one of these things... a little.

Close that door.

- When was the last time you flew one? - 1964.

Oh, my God.

- I need to see your clearance. - This is my clearance. Back off.

Murphy! Put it down and get out!

Come on! Drop it!

Hold your fire, dammit!

Oh, Murphy, you fucking idiot!

I don't like heights. I don't like planes.

I don't like flying. And I especially don't like helicopters.

I think I'm gonna be sick.

On second thought, maybe not.

- Can we take that one up? - It's got engine trouble.

Get hold of the coastguard. I want another chopper, like, yesterday.

Hey, air-wolf, where the hell are we going?

- Oh, my God. What is it? - Damn! We're out of fuel!

What do you mean, we're out of fuel? We can't be out of fuel.

Oh, my God! We're out of fuel!

I don't wanna die! I don't wanna die!

- I don't wanna die. - Hang on, now. Hang on.

I don't wanna die. I don't wanna die. I don't...

I don't wanna die.

I don't wanna die. I don't wanna die. I don't wanna die. I don't wanna die.

Hey. We've already landed.

- Where are we? - On a barn.

A barn? I don't believe this is happening to me.

You know what this is? This is the worst day of my life.

You know why? Because of you, barf bag.

Hey, pubic hair, I'm talking to you!

I think we'd better get away before somebody spots this chopper.

Uh, no way, Jos�. I'm staying right here.

As long as we got these, where I go, you go.

Hello there!

Get the hell out of there! Let's go!

Look what the hell you've done to my barn! Who are you?

This guy's an escaped killer, the helicopter's stolen and I'm his hostage.

You stole a police helicopter? What do you think I am, stupid?

It happens to be true, jock-itch. Call the cops and let 'em know where we are.

Did you hear that, boys? All we gotta do is call the cops.

- While we're at it, let's call the governor. - And the president.

Look, penis envy, if you don't call the cops, I will!

They're not gonna call anybody.

Look at all this shit. This is a dope farm.

Hey! No kidding?

You guys grow marijuana?

Come on, let's light up a few joints and party.

This little girl wants to party.

- We should give the girl what she wants. - Oh, yes.

- Kiss my ass! - Get away from her.

You bastard!

- Hold this bitch down. - With pleasure.

Get off me, you fucking son of a bitch!

Want me to hurt you, baby? Want me to hurt you? Cos I'll hurt you.

No!

Nothing you can do about it. Just lay back and enjoy it.

Don't, you son of a bitch!

- Come on, baby. Come on. - No! Murphy!

Let's be friends. Cos I'm gonna give it to you like you ain't never had it before.

- Don't! - I want her second, Kelly.

Murphy! Don't! Get off, you...

Look, don't do it! Don't do it!

Don't do it, man. Please don't do it.

- Not having such a good time now? - Please, man, don't kill us. Please, man.

First one who sticks his head out the door gets it blown off.

OK, man. OK.

- Can you wire that truck? - Does the Pope shit in the woods?

Check this out. They left the keys.

Hello?

Anybody here?

Hello?

Murphy, come on. Murphy? Come on. Murphy, please.

Come on. Don't dump on me, you buffalo shit.

Hey, come on, Murphy.

Hey, come on, Murphy.

Hello?

I'm calling you a doctor.

Put that phone down.

Who are you?

There's a friend of yours in the other room and he's hurt.

- What's his name? - Murphy.

- Where did you learn stitches like that? - In the medical corps in Korea.

- He gonna be all right? - He's got himself a concussion.

He'll probably be OK in a couple of days or so.

He's going to have a hell of a headache, though.

I'm Ben Wilcove. You got a name?

Arabella McGee.

- You hungry, McGee? - Yeah.

- You a cop? - I used to be.

What happened?

I got shot in the back with a.22 by a 16-year-old kid.

- You don't like cops much, huh? - Not much.

I don't either.

- Morning. - Morning.

- How you feeling? - I've seen better days.

- Where's Ben? - Outside somewhere.

Hey. You shouldn't be drinking, you know.

Yeah, I know.

You always this friendly, huh?

Listen, kid. I know you don't like me.

Well, I don't like you.

I know you don't wanna be here and I don't want you to be here, so let's let it go.

Fine.

Ow! Dammit!

Here.

- What the hell is it? - It happens to be an omelette.

I thought maybe you'd like something for breakfast besides Jack Daniel's.

Jesus. If I was going to eat anything, it wouldn't be that garbage.

Fine, dog-snot. Don't eat it.

Wear it!

You know, Murphy, you have always been a stupid jerk,

but this time you are a particular kind of stupid jerk.

- What the hell are you talking about? - She just took off.

It's fine by me.

Murphy.

You're gonna need a gun, man.

- This gun looks familiar. - It should be.

It's my old backup piece and it saved my butt, man.

Maybe it can take care of yours.

Chances are I will need it.

No, you just get the bastard that framed you.

Take care, old friend.

Murph?

McGee?

Ugh!

- Hey! - Why don't you just go away?

You're a jinx. Every time you show up in my life, things go wrong.

First I get arrested, then I get railroaded into this jailbreak.

Why don't you just go away before an aeroplane falls on me or something?

I'm sorry. You're not a bad guy for a cop.

It's just that I don't wanna get involved in your problems. I got enough of my own.

And don't worry. When I turn myself in I won't tell the cops where you are.

Thanks. Now get in.

Get in.

I must have boogers for brains. What the hell am I doing here?

- Hey, pull over. I'm hungry. - I'm not.

Look, whisky-breath. Maybe all you need is a bottle. I want food.

You better take a look at this.

Terrific, huh? They think I'm your accomplice.

He was a pretty nice old guy, huh?

God, who would have killed him?

The same son of a bitch who killed my ex-wife.

- Frank Vincenzo. - Jesus.

Don't you ever make any friends?

- We're gonna split. Go. - Forget it, dog-piss!

The only way I get off the hook is if you do, cos the cops are looking for me.

So from now on, pal, where you go, I go.

You stay with me, you do what I tell you. Do you hear?

- How are you, Judge Kellerman? - Fine, thank you.

The chef recommends you try the breast of quail

stuffed with fresh dates, covered with raspberry vinegar sauce

- and sprinkled with roasted hazelnuts. - Sounds good.

- And a bottle of Veuve Clicquot. - Certainly.

Excuse me.

I know this is gonna sound very corny, but have we ever met?

- I don't know. Have we? - You seem so familiar to me.

I was about to have dessert. Would you join me?

I'd like that very much.

- Doesn't that feel good? - Oh, it feels wonderful!

- That feels so good! - How long's it been...

Well, I must say no one since you've given me a bath has ever given me a bath.

Oh, come, now! Certainly someone's given you a bath before.

Ooh, are you ticklish!

Ooh, tickle!

Right. I'll get back to you.

Hi, guys. I don't mean to bother you, but I got a flat tyre out there

and I was wondering if you could help me fix it.

- I'm freezing. - Come on inside.

Jack, you wanna fix the lady's tyre? OK?

The spare's in the back.

Well.

Nice place you got here. Bet you a lot of important people live here.

A few.

Bet you none of 'em are as good-looking as you are.

Any of these apartments empty?

We got a couple.

Why don't we go upstairs and take a look, huh?

I bet the view is fantastic.

Hey, Jack, I'm gonna take a little break.

Be back in about 20 minutes.

Nice bed! You know what? Pink really gets me hot.

Yeah? Me too.

You know what? I've never felt anything so small.

- Agh! - Murphy! Where the hell are you?

- What took you so long? - I didn't want to interrupt love in bloom.

Pepe's Pizza! You never had a piece like this!

- Hi. $9.75. - Nobody up here ordered pizza.

- Some guy named Guido. - You made a mistake. There's no Guido.

This is the penthouse? I got a large sausage and mushroom pizza for Guido.

- How did you get up here anyway? - The elevator, anchovy-breath.

The elevator don't come up here without a key.

It did for me.

All I know is somebody owes me $9.75. I'm not budging till I get paid.

I wouldn't if I didn't have to, pepperoni-breath.

Where's Vincenzo?

Yes.

Mm-hm.

Mm. Ooh.

I think I'm gonna like that. Mm.

Ooh, yeah.

Do it.

Mm. Do it now.

Mm.

Mm. Do it now.

Oh, baby.

- Do it. Mm... - Hey, hot pants.

If you know what's good for you, get out.

- Lock her in the bathroom. - Come on, Goldilocks.

You son of a bitch.

You killed my ex-wife and my best friend.

I don't know what you're talking about.

Then you had me framed for their murders.

You ought to be ashamed of yourself. Does your mother know what you do?

I didn't do it! I didn't do it!

No, you just paid someone else to do it.

- And I want his name. - I don't have a name.

You're crazy, Murphy. You're just crazy. You're really nuts.

We're gonna play a little roulette. One bullet left.

I want a name.

- Give me a name, Frank. - I...

You're running out of luck, Frank.

Help me! Danny! Ow!

Three left, Frank. Give me a name.

I don't have a name.

- A name. - I didn't hurt anybody.

I didn't kill anybody. I didn't.

I didn't. I didn't. I didn't.

- Two more left, Frank. - I didn't.

The chances are 50-50, Frank.

I hate to say it, but I think he's telling the truth.

The gun was empty, Frank.

- So much for your big play. Now what? - I don't know yet.

Great. We're wanted for murder, we've got a Mafia psycho who wants to bury us

and you're out of ideas? Thanks a lot, douche bag.

If you don't wanna hang around, go.

- Thanks for keeping my seat warm. - Murphy, you ain't worth shit,

but right now you're all I got.

Aw, shit, Jack.

You almost gave me a heart attack.

If I help you and the department finds out,

I could lose my badge, my pension, my career, and I owe up to here.

My life is on the line. Someone's framed me for three murders.

If I don't find out who, they'll put me away for a long time.

Come on, weenie roast. Help the guy out.

Butt out, sweetheart. Nobody's talking to you.

- Have a hernia, motor-mouth! - Why don't you park your tongue?

Why don't you pull on it? If you can find it.

Why don't the both of you shut up?

Jesus Christ! What is this, romper room?

Art, I've run out of options. You have to help me.

What do you want?

I want a list of homicide cases that Wilcove and I worked on.

Someone we put away for a lot of years. Got out in the last couple of months.

- To do that I gotta use the computer. - Yeah.

- Where will I get authorisation for that? - You'll find a way.

Oh, right. Thanks.

You're welcome, dildo-nose.

How much money do I pay you clowns to protect me?

What happens? Some cop waltzes in here, you don't do a goddamn thing about it.

Put the word on the street. $10,000 to anybody who knows where Murphy is.

I want him. You hear me?

And you better find him for me,

or there's gonna be four corpses floating in the goddamn marina!

What?

Nothing.

- Don't you have something to do? - No.

Damn.

What am I, a TV?

Maybe you want to look at me, but I don't want to look at you.

Who says I wanna look at you?

Sometimes I got a big mouth.

No comment.

- It's one of my faults. - You have faults?

- You ain't no charmer either, you know. - Oh, yeah?

Yeah.

Maybe.

- Wanna sandwich? - Sure.

- No mayonnaise. - How can you eat a sandwich without it?

- I don't like mayonnaise. - Everybody likes mayonnaise.

I don't like mayonnaise.

OK. No mayonnaise.

- How old are you, kid? - Why?

- Just wondering. - How long have I been stealing cars?

I know to you I'm just a lowlife.

The way I see it, being a thief is better than being a whore.

I never said you were a lowlife.

Eat your sandwich.

How old are you?

Too old.

For what?

You're not so bad. You stop the boozing, you'd look a lot better.

- Thanks. - I'm serious.

Besides... personally, I like 'em older.

Is that so?

- Is it true what they say about cops? - What?

That their... their guns are substitutes for their wangs.

- Don't you count on it. - Oh, yeah?

Prove it.

- Yeah? - I got three names for you.

- Shoot. - Remember a guy named Red LaSalle?

I don't think this is his style.

- Number two is Jerry Myers. - I remember him.

You tagged him for taking out a union leader. He swore he'd nail you.

- What about number three? - It's a real long shot.

This happened about ten years ago. Do you remember Joan Freeman?

They put her in Camarillo.

- Not any more. They cut her loose. - Jesus. Where is she now?

She's staying in one of those old downtown hotels called the Sunset.

Listen, Art. What was the judge's name at her trial?

Uh... Kellerman. Hear what happened to him? He fried himself.

Murphy? Are you still there?

Joan?

Joan?

- How have you been doing? - Pretty well.

No trouble adjusting to the outside world?

I don't think so. I feel pretty good about myself.

Good. How's the job working out?

Well, actually I decided not to take it.

- Why not? - Cos I got another job. A better job.

Terrific. Doing what?

In a way, you see, I owe it all to you.

You taught me I could do anything I wanted.

You taught me how to believe in myself.

Wonderful. So what's the job?

I'll show you.

What's this?

My job.

I don't understand. Who are these people?

The ones who sent me away.

You never should have let me out, you know.

I really am crazy.

Ugh!

The hotel is not responsible for the loss of personal valuables.

I'm talking almost $200, man.

Look, Helen Keller, read my lips.

The hotel is not responsible for the loss of personal valuables.

Oh, yeah? When it comes time to pay my rent, we'll see who's responsible.

Fucking schwarzer.

- Which room is Joan Freeman in? - Sorry, pal, the guest list is confidential.

- Can you count to five? - Sure.

- How would you like to try without teeth? - It's, uh, 604.

Yeah, this is Marty down at the Sunset.

What are we doing here?

Just looking.

Sounds like fun.

Murphy!

Could you come here?

- Come on, man, what room? - They're in 604.

Hey! Where's my money?

- Who's that stiff? - I don't know, but I gotta get to Malibu.

Malibu? Don't you think it's a little cold to go surfing?

Go!

Happened about ten years ago.

She had a boyfriend who worked as a security guard in the Bradbury Building.

She was down there visiting him one day and they got into an argument.

Then she flipped out, grabbed his gun and shot him.

By the time we got there, she was up on the roof with a hostage.

That's why she framed you.

She killed Wilcove cos he was your partner and you arrested her.

And Kellerman because he was the judge at the trial.

But who's this guy in Malibu?

Albert Skinner? He was the prosecutor.

Mr Skinner?

Nice digs.

This dude must have robbed a couple of banks, huh?

I'll take a look upstairs. If I see any bodies, I'll give a yell.

Mr Skinner?

Hey, Mr Skinner?

Hey!

Come out, come out, wherever you are!

Skinner?

McGee?

Arabella?

Arabella?

- Homicide. - Give me Art Penney.

- He isn't here. - Let me talk to the lieutenant.

- He's not here either. - Oh, damn. Who's this?

This is Sergeant Reineke. Who the hell is this?

Shit.

- Ed, it's Murphy. - Murphy, you son of a bitch.

- I know who killed Ben Wilcove. - Yeah, it was you, you bastard.

Shut up and pay attention.

I've been set up, framed by a woman. Her name's Joan Freeman.

You talk to Art. He knows who she is.

Have the lieutenant send some men to the Bradbury Building. She's on her way.

All right, I'll do that, but come on in, we'll talk about it.

I don't have time for this crap. The woman has a hostage.

Get hold of the lieutenant and I'll meet him down there.

Hey, Ed. What are you doing?

Fine. Fine.

- He's inside. - Go get him.

- Alone? - What are you, afraid of him?

- Murphy? - Up here.

- She's somewhere in the building. - Who? Your fairy godmother?

Hold it right there. Put your gun down.

- Where's the lieutenant? - He's at home watching TV.

Put it down!

You don't have to worry, Jack. I got a friend waiting for you outside.

Frankie Vincenzo wants to share some pasta with you.

You dirty bastard.

You're on the wrong side, Jack.

But it doesn't matter. You always were a loser anyway. Come on.

You're running out of friends, Murphy.

You better hurry!

We're waiting for you.

Where the fuck is he?

Maybe he ain't coming back.

Come on. Come on. Come on. Let's do it.

Who does he think he is? Cochise?

Find him!

Al? Al, did you get him?

Why don't you come up and get me yourself, Frank?

Remember what I told you about Murphy's Law?

Did you remember what I told you?

Don't fuck with Jack Murphy.

You're pretty good, Murphy. But not good enough.

It's time for your girlfriend to die.

Say bye-bye to the little bitch.

What took you so long, butt-crust?

No!

Now it's just you and me.

Do you really hate me now, Murphy?

Could you possibly hate me as much as I hate you?

Please... help me.

Help me. Please.

Help me, dammit!

Oh... You go to hell!

Ladies first.

Move 'em back! Move 'em back!

Move these people back.

Lift.

- You got it? - Yeah.

These go over your side.

Yeah, in the socket. DOA.

Hey, would you dinosaur dorks move it before I bleed to death?

- There it is. - Jesus Christ!

What are you grinning at, snot-rag?

Next time... Next time I get hold of a bar of soap,

I'm gonna wash out your mouth all the way down to the other end of your body.

Yeah, well, blow it out your ass, sperm count.

Guess I'll make that a case of soap.

LA's just a movie set, you're a flash in the pan

Sweat drips from your forehead while your foot's stuck in the sand

You're pushing 105 on the freeway cos you've got to get to nowhere

You see the flashing red in your rear-view but you don't care

Murphy's Law

If anything could possibly go wrong, it will

Hey

You wait in line to pay the fine but you're standing at the wrong window

Then she says "We close at five, so come back tomorrow"

You dodge the traffic, you fight the smog but the paper's in the mail

Somehow you knew all along that you would fail

Murphy's Law

It could happen to you

Murphy's Law

You better know what to do

Murphy said if anything could possibly go wrong

It will

You may be down and out, you may not have a friend

But there's something inside driving you, you never let the freeway end

You say when you're not looking, that's when things are found

But when everyone's out looking for you, it takes guts to turn around

Murphy's Law

Murphy's Law

Visiontext Subtitles: Gill Parrott

ENHOH