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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,613 --> 00:00:05,444 - Isn't it beautiful? - Yeah. 2 00:00:05,693 --> 00:00:08,446 - It's kind of old. - I think it's perfect. 3 00:00:08,693 --> 00:00:11,048 I can't wait to take lessons again. 4 00:00:11,293 --> 00:00:16,321 - Can you play anything now? - "Heart and Soul" and "Chopsticks." 5 00:00:16,773 --> 00:00:17,728 Oh! 6 00:00:17,933 --> 00:00:20,322 Wait, wait, wait. Let's see... 7 00:00:21,773 --> 00:00:27,086 Good night, my someone Good night 8 00:00:27,333 --> 00:00:32,248 That's from The Music Man. My mom sang that to us all the time. 9 00:00:32,453 --> 00:00:37,607 Sleep tight, my someone Sleep tight 10 00:00:37,813 --> 00:00:40,407 My lo... Lo... L... 11 00:00:40,653 --> 00:00:41,722 Lo... 12 00:00:41,933 --> 00:00:45,323 - I can never get that note right. - Tell me about it. 13 00:00:47,453 --> 00:00:51,969 True love can be whispered 14 00:00:52,213 --> 00:00:56,331 From heart to heart 15 00:00:56,533 --> 00:01:00,526 When lovers are parted 16 00:01:00,733 --> 00:01:03,531 They say 17 00:01:03,973 --> 00:01:07,568 But I must depend... 18 00:01:07,813 --> 00:01:13,126 ... on a wish and a star 19 00:01:13,573 --> 00:01:17,805 As long as my heart... 20 00:01:18,053 --> 00:01:24,083 ... doesn 't know who you are 21 00:01:26,093 --> 00:01:28,129 This is a sad song. 22 00:01:28,813 --> 00:01:33,682 It's about a lady who's got nobody, so she sings to an imaginary someone. 23 00:01:33,933 --> 00:01:36,527 - It's about a lady who's... - Just like us. 24 00:01:37,773 --> 00:01:41,129 - I hate pianos. - Maybe I can sell it. 25 00:01:44,453 --> 00:01:45,727 VONDA SINGS: I've been down this road 26 00:01:45,933 --> 00:01:48,731 The Promise 27 00:01:48,933 --> 00:01:52,482 Walking the line That's painted by pride 28 00:01:52,693 --> 00:01:54,968 And I have made mistakes in my life 29 00:01:55,213 --> 00:01:58,888 That I just can 't hide 30 00:01:59,493 --> 00:02:02,087 Oh, I believe I am ready 31 00:02:02,333 --> 00:02:06,042 For what love has to bring 32 00:02:07,213 --> 00:02:10,444 I got myself together 33 00:02:11,133 --> 00:02:13,806 Now I'm ready to sing 34 00:02:14,053 --> 00:02:17,204 I've been searching my soul tonight 35 00:02:17,453 --> 00:02:20,763 I know there's so much more to life 36 00:02:21,653 --> 00:02:24,725 Now I know I can shine a light 37 00:02:24,973 --> 00:02:27,931 To find my way back home 38 00:02:28,173 --> 00:02:32,610 Oh, baby, yeah 39 00:02:32,853 --> 00:02:34,332 Oh, yeah 40 00:02:39,533 --> 00:02:42,809 Get an injunction so they can't sell ice cream? 41 00:02:43,053 --> 00:02:45,362 How can I attach the real estate? 42 00:02:45,573 --> 00:02:49,202 They don't expect to win, just that we be aggressive. 43 00:02:49,413 --> 00:02:54,203 Aggressive we'll be. Harry Pippin's opposing, so be ready when he comes. 44 00:02:54,413 --> 00:02:56,051 - Who's Harry Pippin? - Fat. 45 00:02:56,253 --> 00:03:00,212 Moves like continental drift. They move his case to the top. 46 00:03:00,413 --> 00:03:03,325 - What do you mean? - Because of his condition... 47 00:03:03,533 --> 00:03:06,331 ...the judges don't punish him for being late. 48 00:03:06,533 --> 00:03:10,526 He comes in arguing his case, so when he enters, you jump in. 49 00:03:10,773 --> 00:03:12,331 - Thank you. - Pleasure. 50 00:03:12,533 --> 00:03:13,488 [JOHN HUMS] 51 00:03:17,733 --> 00:03:21,521 New client, Sandra Winchell, F.O.W. I promised we'd help. 52 00:03:21,733 --> 00:03:23,928 - What's F.O. W? RICHARD: Friend of Whipper. 53 00:03:24,133 --> 00:03:27,921 Arrested for prostitution. A conviction means jail. 54 00:03:28,173 --> 00:03:30,733 John, you've visited the subject matter... 55 00:03:30,933 --> 00:03:34,721 The Whip has cracked. Conjugals could be at stake. 56 00:03:36,533 --> 00:03:38,205 - I'll meet with her. - Great. 57 00:03:38,413 --> 00:03:40,404 I'd like you to second chair. 58 00:03:40,613 --> 00:03:43,889 That prudism you waft could benefit us. Teamwork. 59 00:03:44,093 --> 00:03:45,321 - Richard! - The glitch: 60 00:03:45,533 --> 00:03:48,127 She fired her old lawyer. Trial's today. 61 00:03:48,333 --> 00:03:52,042 - What? - New counsel, you'll get a continuance. 62 00:03:52,253 --> 00:03:56,804 - Can't John file for it? - I don't do criminal motion practice. 63 00:03:57,013 --> 00:03:59,049 - Why not? RICHARD: You'll be there anyway... 64 00:03:59,253 --> 00:04:01,130 ...on the ice cream case... Whoa. Whoa. 65 00:04:02,693 --> 00:04:03,921 Hi. 66 00:04:08,413 --> 00:04:11,132 - What have you got for me today? - Hi. 67 00:04:11,573 --> 00:04:13,006 Oh, please. 68 00:04:15,653 --> 00:04:19,362 She almost asked me a question. I said, "Don't spoil it." 69 00:04:19,573 --> 00:04:23,930 - I want no audio attached to her. - What year is this? 70 00:04:24,373 --> 00:04:26,648 - This is not a time for words. - Not a time for words? 71 00:04:26,853 --> 00:04:30,562 Give them law degrees, dress them up, but in the end? 72 00:04:30,773 --> 00:04:33,162 - Neanderthals! - Come on, Ally. 73 00:04:33,373 --> 00:04:36,012 You can't blame us for looking at that. 74 00:04:36,213 --> 00:04:39,444 Can't blame you for looking...? For acting like...? 75 00:04:39,653 --> 00:04:41,723 Are they playing a prank on me? 76 00:04:41,933 --> 00:04:46,927 That is nature at its best out there. Richard Kiley should narrate her. 77 00:04:47,133 --> 00:04:50,011 She's stupid, and soon gravity will get her. 78 00:04:50,213 --> 00:04:55,128 Come on, boys club. Free that hooker. 79 00:04:57,733 --> 00:04:59,086 RENEE: I get vice cases. 80 00:04:59,293 --> 00:05:02,205 I've convicted your client. Have you met her? 81 00:05:02,413 --> 00:05:06,008 No, but she's Whipper's friend. So will you agree to the continuance? 82 00:05:06,213 --> 00:05:07,328 Yes, yeah. 83 00:05:07,533 --> 00:05:10,252 I have to wait here till my ice cream case... 84 00:05:10,453 --> 00:05:11,681 I will cover you. 85 00:05:11,893 --> 00:05:14,407 No likelihood of success on the merits. 86 00:05:14,613 --> 00:05:18,003 Court has affidavits, financial statements. 87 00:05:18,213 --> 00:05:23,412 - My client can satisfy any judgment. - That's Pippin, my ice cream case. 88 00:05:23,733 --> 00:05:25,849 Ally McBeal for the plaintiff! 89 00:05:26,053 --> 00:05:29,011 In 15 years of law I haven't been so shocked. 90 00:05:29,213 --> 00:05:32,205 - I'm denying the plaintiff's motion. - Thank you. 91 00:05:32,853 --> 00:05:36,084 Move for costs, attorney's fees and sanctions... 92 00:05:36,293 --> 00:05:41,128 ...abuse of process, frivolous prosecution, Rule 11. 93 00:05:41,333 --> 00:05:43,722 - It's shocking. - You lose on that. 94 00:05:43,933 --> 00:05:46,288 - Sorry to hear that, Your Honor. - But... 95 00:05:46,493 --> 00:05:49,132 The defendant is far from judgment-proof. 96 00:05:49,333 --> 00:05:53,326 I can't attach property no matter the merits. We're done. 97 00:05:55,613 --> 00:05:58,252 Ally McBeal, counsel for the plaintiff. 98 00:05:58,453 --> 00:06:00,364 - Nice to meet you. - I was hoping... 99 00:06:00,573 --> 00:06:04,486 ...we could settle. It's silly, two ice cream chains fighting. 100 00:06:04,693 --> 00:06:07,765 We want your guy to not call his store Mike's. 101 00:06:07,973 --> 00:06:09,804 - That's his name. - I understand... 102 00:06:10,013 --> 00:06:14,404 ...but he sold the franchise as Mike's and calls his new chain Mike's. 103 00:06:14,613 --> 00:06:18,652 What my client feels he paid for is the trademark name Mike's. 104 00:06:18,853 --> 00:06:21,321 You see, that asset is devalued if... 105 00:06:21,533 --> 00:06:26,482 Are you all right? Mr. Pippin? Oh, my God, Mr. Pippin! 106 00:06:48,013 --> 00:06:50,925 ALLY: Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 107 00:06:51,173 --> 00:06:54,324 - Somebody call 911! MAN: I've got a cell phone. 108 00:06:54,573 --> 00:06:55,926 ALLY: Oh, God. 109 00:06:57,093 --> 00:06:58,924 MAN: Did he hit his head? 110 00:07:10,813 --> 00:07:13,532 Oh, God. Okay, here we go. 111 00:07:19,573 --> 00:07:24,727 Come on, Mr. Pippin, come on! Breathe, just breathe! 112 00:07:24,933 --> 00:07:27,322 Okay, okay. 113 00:07:31,813 --> 00:07:34,566 WOMAN: He's breathing! MAN: Check his pulse. 114 00:07:41,733 --> 00:07:43,086 You saved his life. 115 00:07:43,293 --> 00:07:47,172 Not before he ate a Spanish omelet. God, the onions! 116 00:07:47,413 --> 00:07:51,326 - Is my skin breaking out? - Not yet. Are you okay? 117 00:07:51,773 --> 00:07:53,126 - Yeah. - We'd better go. 118 00:07:53,333 --> 00:07:57,121 Our prostitution case is up in two minutes. Are you okay? 119 00:07:57,333 --> 00:07:58,448 - Fine. - Okay. 120 00:07:58,693 --> 00:08:02,527 23222, Commonwealth vs. Sandra Winchell. 121 00:08:02,733 --> 00:08:05,486 In as much as I've just been retained... 122 00:08:05,693 --> 00:08:10,130 ...I request additional time to prepare my defense. 123 00:08:11,093 --> 00:08:14,165 - Excuse me? - I know a stall when I see one. 124 00:08:14,373 --> 00:08:18,048 - The D.A. Doesn't oppose continuance. - I didn't ask. 125 00:08:18,253 --> 00:08:22,326 That the D.A. Is for it is a reason for me to be against it. 126 00:08:22,533 --> 00:08:23,522 I just got... 127 00:08:23,733 --> 00:08:26,884 She should've fired her lawyer before voir dire. 128 00:08:27,093 --> 00:08:30,369 We have a jury. She had three prior continuances. 129 00:08:30,573 --> 00:08:33,531 - It says "no further continuances." - Your Honor... 130 00:08:33,733 --> 00:08:35,086 Shush! 131 00:08:35,813 --> 00:08:37,326 Shush? 132 00:08:37,573 --> 00:08:39,245 Say "ready for trial"... 133 00:08:39,453 --> 00:08:42,331 ...or I schedule it in a year and revoke bail. 134 00:08:42,533 --> 00:08:45,923 - You can't do that! - Ready for trial or no bail. 135 00:08:46,213 --> 00:08:49,171 - In the interest of justice... - I didn't ask. 136 00:08:49,413 --> 00:08:51,085 Ready or not? 137 00:08:53,813 --> 00:08:55,041 Ready. 138 00:08:55,413 --> 00:08:56,926 Today? 139 00:08:57,333 --> 00:09:01,929 She's had it continued up the wazoo, and the judge finally had enough. 140 00:09:06,373 --> 00:09:07,852 This troubles me. 141 00:09:08,093 --> 00:09:12,006 Otherwise he'd revoke bail and have it continued for a year. 142 00:09:12,213 --> 00:09:13,931 We were kind of stuck. 143 00:09:17,373 --> 00:09:19,523 You have any ideas? 144 00:09:26,893 --> 00:09:28,724 Have I bored you? 145 00:09:34,213 --> 00:09:36,852 - Let's proceed. - With the trial? 146 00:09:37,893 --> 00:09:38,689 Yes. 147 00:09:38,893 --> 00:09:40,326 - Today? - Yes. 148 00:09:41,173 --> 00:09:43,733 ALLY: Because you're insane? - Yes. 149 00:09:45,093 --> 00:09:48,608 I'll go gather myself. 150 00:09:52,453 --> 00:09:54,683 - Ms. McBeal? - Yeah. 151 00:09:54,893 --> 00:09:59,091 I'm Angela Tharp, Harry Pippin's fianc�e. 152 00:09:59,693 --> 00:10:02,161 Oh! Oh, hey. 153 00:10:02,373 --> 00:10:04,250 - Is he okay? - He's fine. 154 00:10:04,493 --> 00:10:07,166 It wasn't a heart attack, just angina. 155 00:10:07,453 --> 00:10:11,128 And we're getting married on Friday and, well... 156 00:10:11,853 --> 00:10:14,128 ...the doctor thinks it was nerves. 157 00:10:14,813 --> 00:10:18,806 - That's fantastic. He's okay? - Yes, thanks to you. 158 00:10:19,053 --> 00:10:23,524 He did lose oxygen, so if you hadn't have been there... 159 00:10:24,613 --> 00:10:27,332 I just came to tell you how grateful I am. 160 00:10:27,693 --> 00:10:31,368 - I'm just glad that I could help. - Oh, you've helped. 161 00:10:31,613 --> 00:10:33,126 He's... 162 00:10:34,413 --> 00:10:37,485 He's the best thing that ever happened to me. 163 00:10:37,733 --> 00:10:42,932 Well, I think I'm here because you kind of saved my life too. 164 00:10:43,813 --> 00:10:45,690 That's sweet. 165 00:10:46,573 --> 00:10:49,531 - Can I give you a hug? - Sure. 166 00:10:52,093 --> 00:10:53,162 [ALLY'S SPINE CRACKS] 167 00:10:53,373 --> 00:10:57,844 - Oh, my God, I've broken you! - No, I'm fine. 168 00:10:58,213 --> 00:11:01,603 - I feel terrible! - No, I pop out of alignment easily. 169 00:11:01,813 --> 00:11:04,725 - It's me, it's me. - Actually, I can fix that. 170 00:11:04,933 --> 00:11:07,766 I'm not a chiropractor, but I work for one. 171 00:11:07,973 --> 00:11:10,612 I think I'm really okay. 172 00:11:10,813 --> 00:11:14,089 - It's right down here by the L-5. - I'm really... 173 00:11:14,973 --> 00:11:16,531 ...okay. 174 00:11:17,293 --> 00:11:20,012 - Better? - Yeah, yeah, much. 175 00:11:20,533 --> 00:11:22,125 Thanks. 176 00:11:24,973 --> 00:11:27,328 I'm just gonna sit... 177 00:11:29,213 --> 00:11:31,522 ...here for a second. 178 00:11:31,973 --> 00:11:33,247 On the floor? 179 00:11:33,493 --> 00:11:35,927 Yeah, I love the floor. 180 00:11:41,733 --> 00:11:44,327 - Will you come to the wedding? - Sure. 181 00:11:45,133 --> 00:11:47,772 Great. It's Friday, 6:00. 182 00:11:48,333 --> 00:11:49,448 Great. 183 00:11:49,773 --> 00:11:51,286 See you then. 184 00:11:51,893 --> 00:11:53,167 See you then. 185 00:11:53,533 --> 00:11:54,932 Bye. 186 00:11:57,973 --> 00:12:01,329 ALLY: Somebody's bound to come in here and help me up. 187 00:12:03,093 --> 00:12:08,213 - Shouldn't you be at the courthouse? - I don't know how to defend this case. 188 00:12:08,413 --> 00:12:11,052 - Vigorously. - Thank you, I'm clear now. 189 00:12:11,293 --> 00:12:14,922 - I can't even find John! - It's a question of burden of... 190 00:12:17,773 --> 00:12:18,922 Proof. 191 00:12:20,013 --> 00:12:21,002 WOMAN: Thanks. 192 00:12:21,213 --> 00:12:23,329 - Do you have anything? - Just this. 193 00:12:40,133 --> 00:12:43,762 She can really increase the blood flow, can't she? 194 00:12:44,013 --> 00:12:45,526 Don't you... 195 00:12:47,013 --> 00:12:48,332 What? 196 00:12:48,933 --> 00:12:53,643 The date cost $ 1000. Anything on top of the escort would be more. 197 00:12:53,853 --> 00:12:56,925 What do you mean, "On top of the escort"? 198 00:12:57,573 --> 00:13:01,930 - Sex. Sex was more. - Did you pay more, Dr. Carpenter? 199 00:13:02,213 --> 00:13:06,923 Yes, we agreed upon $ 700 for missionary intercourse. 200 00:13:07,133 --> 00:13:08,691 And did the two of you... 201 00:13:09,333 --> 00:13:14,407 We began to. Then Special Agent Mackleroy entered and intervened. 202 00:13:14,973 --> 00:13:16,770 - You were arrested? - I was. 203 00:13:17,013 --> 00:13:21,928 Dr. Carpenter, your relations with the defendant, it was sex for a fee? 204 00:13:22,173 --> 00:13:24,004 - That's correct. - You're clear? 205 00:13:24,213 --> 00:13:27,523 I have the receipt. I deduct it for stress therapy. 206 00:13:27,893 --> 00:13:30,327 I see. Thank you, sir. 207 00:13:39,413 --> 00:13:41,131 Mr. Cage? 208 00:14:14,613 --> 00:14:17,411 My name is John Cage. How do you do, sir? 209 00:14:18,013 --> 00:14:19,048 Hi. 210 00:14:25,013 --> 00:14:27,322 I have no questions, Your Honor. 211 00:14:43,293 --> 00:14:46,410 I fell into your open arms 212 00:14:46,653 --> 00:14:48,928 And I didn 't stand a chance 213 00:14:49,133 --> 00:14:51,089 Now listen, honey 214 00:14:51,333 --> 00:14:52,812 GEORGIA: No cross? - Nothing. 215 00:14:53,013 --> 00:14:56,244 He introduces himself to the client and sits down! 216 00:14:56,453 --> 00:14:58,171 - Is he a kook? - I don't know. 217 00:14:58,373 --> 00:15:01,524 He pours water. He unbuttons... 218 00:15:01,933 --> 00:15:03,571 - Never mind. - What? 219 00:15:03,773 --> 00:15:06,492 It's about the case and you are the enemy. 220 00:15:07,013 --> 00:15:10,722 You're talking about Cage, I bet. He's a kook. 221 00:15:11,293 --> 00:15:12,282 Ally. 222 00:15:13,213 --> 00:15:16,444 Harry, what are you doing out of the hospital? 223 00:15:16,653 --> 00:15:20,532 They released me. Your office said I could find you here. 224 00:15:21,773 --> 00:15:26,324 - What's the matter? - Could we talk in private? 225 00:15:27,333 --> 00:15:29,130 Maybe upstairs? 226 00:15:42,973 --> 00:15:45,362 Something is the matter, isn't it? 227 00:15:47,693 --> 00:15:52,892 One of my strengths as a trial lawyer is I can size people up fast. 228 00:15:53,213 --> 00:15:55,329 I got a feeling about you. 229 00:15:56,293 --> 00:16:00,081 - What are you saying? - I'm saying that... 230 00:16:00,293 --> 00:16:04,923 ...in addition to being beautiful, I can tell you are compassionate. 231 00:16:06,613 --> 00:16:09,605 And however remote the odds... 232 00:16:09,853 --> 00:16:13,129 ...you can't win a raffle if you don't buy a ticket. 233 00:16:15,413 --> 00:16:17,131 What are you saying? 234 00:16:17,813 --> 00:16:21,169 Do you think a person such as yourself... 235 00:16:21,373 --> 00:16:25,127 ...could ever become interested in a person such as myself? 236 00:16:26,733 --> 00:16:31,932 Well, absolutely a person like me could like somebody like you. 237 00:16:32,213 --> 00:16:34,044 Absolutely. 238 00:16:34,333 --> 00:16:37,530 Do you think you could ever be interested in me? 239 00:16:38,253 --> 00:16:43,407 Well, um... Harry... Um... 240 00:16:45,693 --> 00:16:47,923 Angela's a friend of mine. 241 00:16:48,893 --> 00:16:51,453 What I mean is I've met her. 242 00:16:51,653 --> 00:16:54,087 What I mean is you're marrying her Friday. 243 00:16:54,613 --> 00:16:57,002 Yeah, I've come to reconsider that. 244 00:16:57,573 --> 00:16:59,006 Because of me? 245 00:17:00,213 --> 00:17:02,932 - I never had a kiss like that before. - Oh, Harry, I... 246 00:17:04,013 --> 00:17:06,322 Don't get me wrong. I love Angela. 247 00:17:07,133 --> 00:17:08,532 It's... 248 00:17:09,293 --> 00:17:10,885 It's just... 249 00:17:12,613 --> 00:17:15,002 It's not a romantic love. 250 00:17:15,813 --> 00:17:18,611 We're good friends with limited options. 251 00:17:19,093 --> 00:17:20,970 She's not in love with you? 252 00:17:21,173 --> 00:17:25,769 Actually, she is. It's one of the reasons I... 253 00:17:25,973 --> 00:17:29,852 It's nice to have someone who loves you. It's comfort, but... 254 00:17:30,053 --> 00:17:32,851 No, but what? Comfort is good. 255 00:17:33,773 --> 00:17:36,765 I'm not asking you to declare yourself, but... 256 00:17:37,013 --> 00:17:41,723 ...if you think you might have the slightest inclination... 257 00:17:41,933 --> 00:17:47,132 ...just to go out on a date to see if there's a scintilla of a chance. 258 00:17:51,413 --> 00:17:53,973 I don't see the possibility. 259 00:17:58,013 --> 00:17:58,809 Okay. 260 00:18:02,613 --> 00:18:07,129 Like I said, you can't win the raffle if you don't buy a ticket. 261 00:18:09,773 --> 00:18:11,331 I'll be leaving now. 262 00:18:12,133 --> 00:18:16,046 And I'll be out of the room momentarily. 263 00:18:17,053 --> 00:18:17,849 Okay. 264 00:18:34,973 --> 00:18:36,804 You had to be honest. 265 00:18:37,013 --> 00:18:38,731 - Really? - What would you do? 266 00:18:38,933 --> 00:18:42,403 Have him cancel his wedding, take him out to be nice? 267 00:18:42,613 --> 00:18:46,401 - You should have seen him sag. - Can I ask you something? 268 00:18:46,613 --> 00:18:49,764 Why did you dismiss the idea of dating him? 269 00:18:50,013 --> 00:18:52,322 Well, he's... 270 00:18:54,373 --> 00:18:59,367 - I just didn't think he was my type. - You ruled him out instantly on looks. 271 00:18:59,573 --> 00:19:01,689 - That's not true. - How is it not? 272 00:19:01,893 --> 00:19:04,123 - You don't know him! - I knew enough. 273 00:19:04,333 --> 00:19:05,607 I knew he was... 274 00:19:06,813 --> 00:19:08,610 ...in questionable health. 275 00:19:08,813 --> 00:19:12,089 I get nervous around people with heart conditions. 276 00:19:12,293 --> 00:19:16,844 Why do you lie to me? Let's just admit the truth. 277 00:19:17,093 --> 00:19:20,972 You eliminated with an eye-blink on looks alone! 278 00:19:21,213 --> 00:19:24,330 That is not... It just isn't that simple. 279 00:19:26,133 --> 00:19:29,250 The thought of the two of us on a date... 280 00:19:29,933 --> 00:19:32,731 ALLY: You get a vision of how the date might go. 281 00:19:32,973 --> 00:19:38,127 Then you say yes or no, and I just couldn 't picture the two of us. 282 00:19:43,933 --> 00:19:45,525 The sad thing is... 283 00:19:45,773 --> 00:19:50,403 ...in a movie, we'd both be rooting for the gal to date the guy. 284 00:19:53,813 --> 00:19:59,012 I used to be a lawyer. I worked in a downtown firm for six years. 285 00:19:59,213 --> 00:20:01,602 - Which firm, ma'am? - Cubbings and Gil. 286 00:20:01,813 --> 00:20:05,010 - You left to join the escort business? - Yes. 287 00:20:05,213 --> 00:20:07,807 And the reason for your career change? 288 00:20:08,173 --> 00:20:12,325 I couldn't meet any interesting men, at least not single men. 289 00:20:12,533 --> 00:20:16,606 The best ones, the most interesting, they were all married. 290 00:20:16,813 --> 00:20:19,452 - They were asking me out. - The married men? 291 00:20:19,653 --> 00:20:22,042 I should say they were asking me in. 292 00:20:22,253 --> 00:20:25,290 And this impelled a change in your vocation? 293 00:20:25,973 --> 00:20:29,170 - In an odd way, yes. - Could you elaborate? 294 00:20:29,413 --> 00:20:33,770 Well, married men, good men, were always hitting on me. 295 00:20:33,973 --> 00:20:38,410 Every male friendship I've had, whether it be a love for Dickens... 296 00:20:38,613 --> 00:20:43,562 ...the symphony, similar upbringings, whatever the basis for friendship... 297 00:20:43,773 --> 00:20:48,130 ...they've almost always ended in the men wanting to sleep with me. 298 00:20:48,573 --> 00:20:51,690 This drove you to the escort service? 299 00:20:51,893 --> 00:20:56,842 I concluded man as a species isn't suitable for long-term partnership. 300 00:20:57,053 --> 00:20:58,725 Objection! 301 00:21:03,773 --> 00:21:07,083 - Withdrawn. - No. The objection is sustained. 302 00:21:07,373 --> 00:21:09,603 I'm trying to make sense of this. 303 00:21:10,773 --> 00:21:13,845 You hate men, so you became a call girl? 304 00:21:14,053 --> 00:21:17,284 I became cynical of long-term relationships. 305 00:21:17,493 --> 00:21:20,610 Men stayed interested for finite periods of time... 306 00:21:20,813 --> 00:21:23,725 ...so I chose to engage in finite relationships. 307 00:21:23,933 --> 00:21:26,493 I need to make a living, so I get paid. 308 00:21:26,693 --> 00:21:29,161 What kind of message does this send? 309 00:21:29,373 --> 00:21:33,002 I'm not trying to send any message. I've been discreet. 310 00:21:33,213 --> 00:21:37,365 - You only know because of my arrest. - Let's be fair here... 311 00:21:37,573 --> 00:21:40,007 ...you hardly lead a noble life. 312 00:21:40,213 --> 00:21:44,923 No. And I've never disappointed anyone pretending to be noble. 313 00:21:45,613 --> 00:21:47,012 See the star witness? 314 00:21:47,213 --> 00:21:51,491 Doctor, community-minded, on the school committee, soccer coach. 315 00:21:51,693 --> 00:21:56,813 He's noble. He also pays me with his VISA to earn frequent flyer miles. 316 00:21:57,013 --> 00:22:00,608 One might say you trapped him with your feminine wiles. 317 00:22:00,813 --> 00:22:04,488 Sure. But I didn't slither up to him wearing perfume. 318 00:22:04,813 --> 00:22:07,725 He found me in the yellow pages. 319 00:22:10,733 --> 00:22:14,567 Sorry. The Commonwealth sees the humor. 320 00:22:16,813 --> 00:22:18,326 ALLY: I don 't. 321 00:22:21,333 --> 00:22:24,769 First time I saw a lawyer object to her witness. 322 00:22:24,973 --> 00:22:29,091 Shut up. The things she said about men and relationships... 323 00:22:29,293 --> 00:22:31,932 ...you think a jury could buy that? 324 00:22:32,133 --> 00:22:34,931 You objected because we almost buy into it. 325 00:22:35,133 --> 00:22:38,648 - We do not! - Do we meet interesting, single men? 326 00:22:38,853 --> 00:22:41,890 We're lawyers. All we meet are male attorneys. 327 00:22:42,093 --> 00:22:46,609 And that is a pathetic breed. And I have yet to meet... 328 00:22:49,893 --> 00:22:50,689 John. 329 00:22:51,773 --> 00:22:53,286 Here is the exception. 330 00:22:53,493 --> 00:22:56,212 Why are you lunching with the D.A.? 331 00:22:56,413 --> 00:23:00,167 - Renee and I live together. - It's come to that. No men. 332 00:23:01,373 --> 00:23:06,401 We're in the middle of trial. It's inappropriate to lunch with the D.A. 333 00:23:10,733 --> 00:23:11,529 Ally. 334 00:23:12,213 --> 00:23:15,011 Harry Pippin is making his approach. 335 00:23:24,693 --> 00:23:26,206 What brings you here? 336 00:23:27,493 --> 00:23:30,405 Just thought I'd pop in and say hi. 337 00:23:31,813 --> 00:23:33,371 I talked to my client. 338 00:23:33,853 --> 00:23:37,084 They'll change the name of the ice cream franchise... 339 00:23:37,293 --> 00:23:42,208 ...if your client is willing to waive the anti-compete clause in Cambridge. 340 00:23:42,693 --> 00:23:46,606 Well, that sounds like we could make it work. 341 00:23:47,293 --> 00:23:49,409 - Great. - Great. 342 00:23:50,973 --> 00:23:53,009 ELAINE: Door. Snappish. 343 00:23:53,293 --> 00:23:54,612 So, um... 344 00:23:57,373 --> 00:23:58,647 Anything else? 345 00:23:59,693 --> 00:24:03,163 I came to apologize for the time that I came before. 346 00:24:03,373 --> 00:24:06,490 - That's okay. - And I know Angela was here. 347 00:24:09,053 --> 00:24:12,887 I feel like I put you on and in a spot, and it wasn't fair. 348 00:24:13,093 --> 00:24:17,006 Oh, it's okay. I was flattered. 349 00:24:20,293 --> 00:24:21,169 Look, Ally... 350 00:24:22,613 --> 00:24:26,322 Don't take this the wrong way. I'm not courting you but... 351 00:24:26,853 --> 00:24:28,286 But what? 352 00:24:29,893 --> 00:24:33,249 You know how I get a feeling about people? 353 00:24:33,453 --> 00:24:37,002 I get the sense that you're kind of the romantic type. 354 00:24:37,213 --> 00:24:39,773 - Well... - I'm not going your way with this. 355 00:24:39,973 --> 00:24:43,966 You don't have to be concerned. I just came for some advice. 356 00:24:44,173 --> 00:24:47,006 - Your advice. - Okay. 357 00:24:48,613 --> 00:24:51,810 You know what I said earlier about Angela? 358 00:24:52,133 --> 00:24:55,762 I do love her. Very much. 359 00:24:55,973 --> 00:24:59,204 She'll be a great mother, and I want kids. 360 00:24:59,413 --> 00:25:03,008 But it's like love out of appreciation. 361 00:25:03,213 --> 00:25:04,931 And maybe convenience. 362 00:25:06,693 --> 00:25:09,605 She's never made my heart bounce. 363 00:25:10,573 --> 00:25:13,804 And sexually, I don't even think of her during... 364 00:25:14,613 --> 00:25:17,810 I guess what I'm trying to ask you is... 365 00:25:18,173 --> 00:25:22,371 ...do you think it's wrong for a person to marry another person... 366 00:25:22,573 --> 00:25:27,249 ...not because she's the one, but because she's the only? 367 00:25:29,613 --> 00:25:33,606 You know I can't tell you whether you should marry Angela. 368 00:25:39,093 --> 00:25:42,403 You know, I just got this piano. 369 00:25:44,293 --> 00:25:48,923 And sometimes I sing the song called, "Goodnight, My Someone." 370 00:25:49,173 --> 00:25:51,403 And it's about... 371 00:25:51,773 --> 00:25:55,812 Basically it's a love song to somebody that you've never met... 372 00:25:56,013 --> 00:25:58,811 ...but you know is out there. 373 00:25:59,373 --> 00:26:04,288 I mean, we make so few promises to ourselves as we grow up. 374 00:26:04,493 --> 00:26:09,692 One of them is that we walk down the aisle with somebody we love. 375 00:26:12,413 --> 00:26:14,802 Somebody who does... 376 00:26:15,453 --> 00:26:18,206 ...make your heart bounce, I guess. 377 00:26:18,973 --> 00:26:22,966 There are some promises that I think we just have to keep. 378 00:26:33,893 --> 00:26:37,772 I come to you because you're the designated sensitive male. 379 00:26:37,973 --> 00:26:40,692 - I beg your pardon? - The mail-room girl. 380 00:26:40,893 --> 00:26:44,442 The one who saunters about with her ample bosom? 381 00:26:44,653 --> 00:26:48,532 - What about her? - The women don't like the gawk-fest. 382 00:26:48,733 --> 00:26:50,724 We feel her continued presence... 383 00:26:50,933 --> 00:26:55,449 ...together with the reactions, add to a hostile working environment. 384 00:26:55,653 --> 00:26:57,689 We sure don't want to file, but... 385 00:26:57,893 --> 00:27:01,852 It's probably best she doesn't make deliveries here anymore. 386 00:27:02,053 --> 00:27:03,088 Whoa, whoa! 387 00:27:04,453 --> 00:27:09,208 As the designated sensitive male, maybe you should speak to Richard. 388 00:27:13,253 --> 00:27:17,007 This isn't about the mating habits of the male species. 389 00:27:17,213 --> 00:27:19,647 It's about, "Did she break the law?" 390 00:27:19,853 --> 00:27:22,970 The law says sex for money is a crime. 391 00:27:23,173 --> 00:27:25,528 Sitting over there is a prostitute. 392 00:27:25,973 --> 00:27:28,009 Proud and rich, I grant you. 393 00:27:28,213 --> 00:27:32,684 But still a person who gives sex for a fee. 394 00:27:33,853 --> 00:27:37,448 That's a crime. You all know it. 395 00:27:44,293 --> 00:27:46,204 Mr. Cage? 396 00:28:19,013 --> 00:28:21,891 Hypocrisy troubles me greatly. 397 00:28:24,293 --> 00:28:29,083 Today's biggest film actresses make upwards of $ 10 million per picture. 398 00:28:29,293 --> 00:28:34,048 They only rise to that level if they'll simulate sex acts on film. 399 00:28:34,293 --> 00:28:38,605 I say simulate. That's merely for the intercourse. 400 00:28:38,813 --> 00:28:42,488 Kissing, nibbling on nipples, tongues in ears and mouths... 401 00:28:42,693 --> 00:28:46,686 ...groping of breasts and thighs, hands on penises, groins... 402 00:28:46,893 --> 00:28:51,011 ...that's real. That's actually going on. 403 00:28:52,773 --> 00:28:57,403 These actresses may say they do it for some redeeming social value. 404 00:28:58,093 --> 00:29:00,402 Well, that and a million bucks. 405 00:29:02,773 --> 00:29:05,207 It happens at lesser levels. 406 00:29:06,413 --> 00:29:10,247 Women employees sometimes gratify their male superiors... 407 00:29:10,453 --> 00:29:13,843 ...in hopes that a promotion ensues. It's not noble... 408 00:29:14,053 --> 00:29:17,602 ...but it happens. Sometimes. 409 00:29:17,813 --> 00:29:19,804 We don't jail them. 410 00:29:20,133 --> 00:29:23,682 Many women don't consider a man marriage material... 411 00:29:23,893 --> 00:29:27,681 ...unless his income's in a certain bracket. It happens. 412 00:29:27,893 --> 00:29:31,602 Women marry for money. We don't jail them. 413 00:29:33,573 --> 00:29:36,212 The truth is... 414 00:29:36,413 --> 00:29:40,565 ...sex has always been a currency for women. Always. 415 00:29:42,253 --> 00:29:46,531 Though often at a quid pro-blurry-quo, my client was honest. 416 00:29:46,813 --> 00:29:50,931 She told the truth. To that man and to you. 417 00:30:03,093 --> 00:30:07,723 I apologize. Hypocrisy always gives me such pause. 418 00:30:10,493 --> 00:30:12,609 Let's all take a moment. 419 00:30:27,853 --> 00:30:29,650 It's not that you didn't... 420 00:30:29,853 --> 00:30:33,482 Holding all thoughts till the verdict lends perspective. 421 00:30:33,893 --> 00:30:36,009 Perspective bogs me down. 422 00:30:40,013 --> 00:30:43,972 Do you personally subscribe to everything in your closing? 423 00:30:44,773 --> 00:30:48,083 You mean about hypocrisy giving me pause? 424 00:30:48,653 --> 00:30:53,807 No, no. About how acceptable it is for women to use sex as currency. 425 00:30:54,413 --> 00:30:57,246 - Did I say "acceptable"? - Yes. 426 00:30:59,253 --> 00:31:04,088 You basically argued that a little prostitution, "What's the big deal?" 427 00:31:04,293 --> 00:31:09,003 And at some level, all women sell sex to get ahead. 428 00:31:09,213 --> 00:31:12,091 If you probe both yourself and the situation... 429 00:31:12,293 --> 00:31:15,046 ...there's a reason I argued that. - Which is? 430 00:31:15,813 --> 00:31:17,292 I was paid to. 431 00:31:22,093 --> 00:31:23,492 That was a Fishism. 432 00:31:26,973 --> 00:31:30,170 - Excuse me. - Angela. 433 00:31:30,573 --> 00:31:32,803 He called off the wedding. 434 00:31:34,293 --> 00:31:38,411 - He did? - What you said made an impression. 435 00:31:39,693 --> 00:31:43,606 He decided he should hold out for the woman of his dreams. 436 00:31:46,853 --> 00:31:52,052 I am the last person who should be giving advice of the heart to anybody. 437 00:31:52,253 --> 00:31:57,281 Look at me. I am a strong career girl who feels empty without a man. 438 00:31:57,493 --> 00:32:02,009 The National Organization for Women has a contract out on my head. 439 00:32:03,173 --> 00:32:06,927 But, see, I am defending a prostitute with arguments like: 440 00:32:07,133 --> 00:32:10,011 "Sex is more currency than love these days." 441 00:32:10,213 --> 00:32:12,773 I see friends getting married because... 442 00:32:13,213 --> 00:32:16,683 ...they're good companions and they have the same ideas... 443 00:32:16,893 --> 00:32:22,092 ...about public versus private school issues, and I just can't buy it! 444 00:32:23,373 --> 00:32:27,810 Harry should marry somebody... 445 00:32:29,413 --> 00:32:32,450 ...who he loves more than life. 446 00:32:32,653 --> 00:32:37,169 And you deserve to be with somebody who loves you like that. 447 00:32:37,453 --> 00:32:41,810 People like me and Harry, we don't get the partners of our dreams. 448 00:32:43,213 --> 00:32:45,408 Harry asked me... 449 00:32:45,853 --> 00:32:48,447 ...if he should marry somebody... 450 00:32:48,653 --> 00:32:52,248 ...not because she's the one, but because she's the only... 451 00:32:52,453 --> 00:32:56,924 Do you think there's someone out there wanting to take care of him? 452 00:32:58,573 --> 00:33:02,771 Sometimes, when you hold out for everything... 453 00:33:02,973 --> 00:33:05,203 ...you walk away with nothing. 454 00:33:05,653 --> 00:33:10,010 Remember that the next time a fat man asks you for advice. 455 00:33:17,973 --> 00:33:20,282 ALLY: Why can 't I give advice to whoever? 456 00:33:20,493 --> 00:33:23,610 I mean, I obviously have love all figured out. 457 00:33:51,533 --> 00:33:54,127 When you feel that you 458 00:33:57,053 --> 00:34:00,011 I don't know what else you could have done. 459 00:34:00,253 --> 00:34:05,452 Maybe I have encouraged him to hold out for the illusion of marriage... 460 00:34:05,813 --> 00:34:08,486 ...and the reality is he could end up alone. 461 00:34:08,693 --> 00:34:10,172 If he doesn't love her... 462 00:34:10,373 --> 00:34:13,604 He does. She just doesn't make his heart bounce. 463 00:34:13,813 --> 00:34:15,963 It should. Not all the time... 464 00:34:16,173 --> 00:34:21,372 ...but at least on your wedding day. His heart should do a hop, right? 465 00:34:23,973 --> 00:34:27,522 Just as the lonely 466 00:34:33,733 --> 00:34:35,883 Pretty quick verdict, actually. 467 00:34:36,093 --> 00:34:40,291 Johnny, great closing yesterday. Passing out any questionnaires? 468 00:34:40,493 --> 00:34:43,087 - That was uncalled for. - See you in there. 469 00:34:43,293 --> 00:34:46,490 I know you've had some trouble with our defense... 470 00:34:46,693 --> 00:34:51,813 You're doing what you have to. Could you excuse me a second? 471 00:34:54,493 --> 00:34:59,408 What's going on? You're not quoting him off-season rates, are you? 472 00:34:59,653 --> 00:35:04,408 - I beg your pardon? - Could you excuse us, please? 473 00:35:04,613 --> 00:35:08,492 What were you discussing? You call off your wedding and now... 474 00:35:10,813 --> 00:35:13,407 - I think you should marry Angela. - Really? 475 00:35:13,613 --> 00:35:17,367 Companionship and trust. Those are real things. 476 00:35:17,973 --> 00:35:19,406 What about my heart? 477 00:35:21,213 --> 00:35:22,248 Yeah. 478 00:35:23,093 --> 00:35:25,209 I was thinking... 479 00:35:26,093 --> 00:35:29,608 ...and sometimes the worst thing for somebody's heart... 480 00:35:30,293 --> 00:35:32,409 ...could be Ioneliness. 481 00:35:34,053 --> 00:35:37,250 Last night I was thinking about all of my friends... 482 00:35:37,453 --> 00:35:42,607 ...who I thought might be right for you. I'm ashamed to say this... 483 00:35:44,213 --> 00:35:47,011 ...but none of my friends would go out with you. 484 00:35:49,093 --> 00:35:51,243 Because of my heft? 485 00:35:53,213 --> 00:35:54,202 Yeah. 486 00:35:55,373 --> 00:35:56,886 Probably. 487 00:35:57,893 --> 00:36:01,681 So you think I should settle for Angela? 488 00:36:03,293 --> 00:36:06,649 I don't think you should think of it as settling. 489 00:36:06,853 --> 00:36:10,607 Not if you want a family and partnership. 490 00:36:10,973 --> 00:36:16,001 Sometimes, we gotta look at our choices and just make the best one. 491 00:36:17,573 --> 00:36:20,167 And Angela, she's a good girl. 492 00:36:22,413 --> 00:36:23,209 Yeah. 493 00:36:25,093 --> 00:36:26,208 She is. 494 00:36:28,373 --> 00:36:32,810 And promises that we make ourselves when we're kids... 495 00:36:34,293 --> 00:36:35,567 Stupid anyway. 496 00:36:45,253 --> 00:36:46,811 [JOHN HUMS] 497 00:36:52,693 --> 00:36:54,365 I apologize. 498 00:36:54,573 --> 00:36:57,007 Has the jury reached its verdict? 499 00:36:57,813 --> 00:37:00,122 - We have, Your Honor. - What say you? 500 00:37:00,333 --> 00:37:03,405 We find the defendant not guilty. 501 00:37:05,213 --> 00:37:08,683 JUDGE: Thank you for your time and service. Adjourned. 502 00:37:08,893 --> 00:37:11,407 Thank you so much. 503 00:37:11,693 --> 00:37:16,050 Thanks for sitting here in apparent support. I'm sure it helped. 504 00:37:16,253 --> 00:37:18,847 It was apparent, Sandra. 505 00:37:19,093 --> 00:37:22,130 My outlook's just a little different from yours. 506 00:37:22,373 --> 00:37:25,649 I know. And I envy you. 507 00:37:27,893 --> 00:37:29,121 I really do. 508 00:37:38,053 --> 00:37:40,203 - You lost? - We won. 509 00:37:47,373 --> 00:37:51,685 - What are you doing? - After each case, I gather thoughts. 510 00:37:51,893 --> 00:37:55,727 Great news. Harry and Angela are back on. Friday night. 511 00:37:55,933 --> 00:37:57,446 - Great. - Angela called. 512 00:37:57,653 --> 00:38:01,566 You played Cupid so she'd like you there. Don't wear white. 513 00:38:01,853 --> 00:38:03,127 Thank you. 514 00:38:06,413 --> 00:38:10,611 - I resent this side of the door. - Do you want to know my thoughts? 515 00:38:10,813 --> 00:38:15,091 The world's in trouble. We laugh at people for seeking romance. 516 00:38:15,293 --> 00:38:19,809 We laud hookers under the guise of autonomy. Shall I write it down? 517 00:38:20,053 --> 00:38:21,122 [HUMS] 518 00:38:22,773 --> 00:38:26,004 Why do you do that... thing? 519 00:38:26,413 --> 00:38:30,804 I stutter. I did as a child, anyway. I controlled it with music. 520 00:38:31,013 --> 00:38:35,882 I'd sing "John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt. His name is my name too." 521 00:38:36,733 --> 00:38:37,609 Yeah. 522 00:38:38,773 --> 00:38:42,891 I sing to myself to control my stutter if I feel nervous. 523 00:38:43,093 --> 00:38:47,530 And sometimes a refrain just kind of pops out. Anyway. 524 00:38:48,613 --> 00:38:52,970 I didn't come to collect your thoughts. I came to give you mine. 525 00:38:53,173 --> 00:38:57,007 Criminal law requires that criminal lawyers play a game. 526 00:38:57,213 --> 00:39:00,489 I know. You needn't apologize for the system... 527 00:39:00,693 --> 00:39:03,412 ...or for your little performance. I get it. 528 00:39:03,613 --> 00:39:06,810 I did not come in here to apologize. I came... 529 00:39:09,893 --> 00:39:13,203 The world is no longer a romantic place. 530 00:39:13,573 --> 00:39:16,849 Some of its people still are, however. 531 00:39:17,093 --> 00:39:19,607 And therein lies the promise. 532 00:39:24,493 --> 00:39:27,212 Don't let the world win, Ally McBeal. 533 00:39:34,453 --> 00:39:36,603 That's what I came in to say. 534 00:39:40,253 --> 00:39:43,006 He's a strange little biscuit, isn't he? 535 00:41:14,093 --> 00:41:15,162 OLD LADY: You Stinker! 536 00:41:16,533 --> 00:41:17,522 Subtitles by SDI Media Group 537 00:41:17,693 --> 00:41:18,682 [ENGLISH SDH] 43114

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