Original subtitles

Daddy needs to express some rage.

Where

are

the fucking dogs?

So, this week...

I'll be reacting to a trailer for a movie which I honestly thought came out

like a year ago.

Free Guy.

Apparently it's this August.

We also have a guest reactor this week.

Korg, who was not my first choice, but apparently everyone else was too busy

over on Disney+. Say hello, Korg.

Hello, Maid of Rocks. Thank you for having me, Paul. Sorry you're dead.

Jesus Christ.

Let's take a look.

My name is Guy.

Oh, he's named Guy, like the movie's title. That's pretty clever.

Is it?

I've got a best friend. This is the greatest cup of coffee of all time.

Uh-oh!

Mondays, am I right, Joe? You said it, Guy.

Let's just pause for a second and let everyone comment first.

Or this trailer gives away too much, or Ryan Reynolds is just me, which is super

insulting, by the way.

All done? And I work at the bank.

Everybody down!

I thought I had everything I needed.

But then I met her.

Oh, Jodie Comer. God, I love her so much. Oh, I hope they don't fridge her.

What's fridging? Well, it's the practice of killing off or hurting a female

character in order to motivate or torture the main character, also known

as Deadpool 2. Thank you for asking.

Ah, we call that bridging.

Everybody down on the ground.

Everybody except you.

Me?

There's something inside you, guy. We expected you to... Oh, it's a situation.

Put these on. Okay.

Fine, I do.

Oh, my God!

What are these, trick glasses or something?

It's about trick glasses. The glass tricker. This world, it's a video game.

You're not real.

Please, that man... I'm the guy responsible for this world. Any thoughts

on our villain, Korg? Uh, looks like he's got four arms.

And the two lower ones, they've got gloves on.

I like them.

You have a Disney Plus show, don't you, Faith?

Oh, God.

Trademark infringement. Doesn't that mean that nothing you do matters? I am

sitting here with my best friend trying to help him get through a tough time.

Now, if that's not real, I don't know what is.

I know this world.

Look at him go.

That little blue shirt.

Oh, his face is so punchable. Thanks, guys. I'm going to be the great guy.

Well, enjoy your lifetime supply of virginity.

Off you go.

This whole good guy routine is ruining the game.

Terminate him. Let's take a whitey to.

He seems quite nice, actually.

A rabbit.

Maybe this is the live-action thumper we all haven't been waiting for.

Jump! Jump!

Jump and catch the ball!

Aw, useless.

Body airbag.

Love it.

I can't die!

Something bad's going to be up. There we go.

Okay, this looks fun in a last days of Fox fire sale kind of

way. Not sure if it was worth diverting Canadian Cumberbatch's little mind away

from my next movie.

You know what? I'm going to give it four out of five avocados. Korg?

I was raised by avocados.

Oh, my God. Just kill me now.

Any tips on getting into the MCU there, Korg?

Have a dream.

Chase it.

Lose that dream.

Just sabotage all sorts of happiness in pursuit of that dream. Climb up to the

peaks of that mountain, and when you get to the top, land at the bottom and

realize you're never going to achieve that dream. And at that point...

Check your emails.

Maybe you'll get something from your agent saying Marvel wants to talk.

Yeah, I prefer Dark World.

Half a f***ing penny of you for this.