All language subtitles for Orange Is The New Black S02E12 It Was The Change (1080p x265 Joy)

[ Gate Closes ]

[ Woman ]
♪ The animals, the animals ♪

♪ Trapped, trapped, trapped
till the cage is full ♪

♪ The cage is full
The day is new ♪

♪ And everyone is waiting,
waiting on you ♪

♪ And you've got time ♪

♪ Think of all the roads ♪

♪ Think of all their crossings ♪

♪ Taking steps is easy ♪

♪ Standing still is hard ♪

♪ Remember all their faces ♪

♪ Remember all their voices ♪

♪ Everything is different ♪

♪ The second time around ♪

[ Gate Closes, Lock Clicks ]

♪ And you've got time ♪

♪ And you've got time ♪♪

[ Gate Closes, Lock Clicks ]

- [ Raining ]
- [ Thunder Rumbling ]

It was an honest mistake.
She was trying to help.

A little more help and I'll be dead.

She hates wearing her glasses.

Says it makes her nose look big.

You want to assassinate someone,
vision is a basic requirement.

It's like step one, pick a person to kill.

Step two, kill that person.

She won't last a month in the SHU.

This is a royal fuckup, girls.

Vee is going to know that she is the target.

The whole family is in danger.

Unless, we use it to our advantage.

She doesn't know it was a mistake.

We tell her it's a warning shot.

Don't fuck with Red.

Or a 79-year-old woman will
shank someone you never met.

[ Frieda ]
That's how scary you are.

Stab a stranger in the kidney
just to send a message.

If I was this Vee person,
I'd think twice about pissing you off.

It's what Taslitz would want.

Taslitz got us into this situation.

We're not doubling down on that nonsense.

We need to explain what happened peacefully.

- A parley.
- Parley?

What are we, pirates?

Well, one of us does have an octopus tattoo.

[ Sophia ]
Taping windows is not a good idea.

[ Wanda ]
It's in the emergency manual.

[ Ford ]
Bad news, Hurricane Wanda.

You've been downgraded to a tropical storm.

Hilarious.

The weatherman said
you're getting wider though.

You could flatten a few trees
when your ass hits land.

Okay, Steve Harvey. We get it.

Last time we had leaks
in Room 4 and in Intake and in the pharmacy.

[ Sighs ] They did
some patchwork over the summer...

but I am not optimistic
about what's happening up there.

- This place needs a new roof.
- Yeah, Fig is all over that.

Don't worry. She's also getting us an
espresso bar and a swimming pool.

[ Woman On PA, indistinct ]

Ripped By mstoll

[ Coughs ]

[ Whirring ]

[ Vacuum Off ]

So much for learning your lesson, huh?

- What lesson is that? - I don't know,
associating with the criminal element.

Girl, I am the criminal element,
and so are you last time I checked.

- You know what I mean.
- Man, don't start this again.

- Yo, she got you thrown in the SHU.
- That wasn't her.

That was this place coming down on me like
it's done before, and it'll do it again.

[ Man On PA, indistinct ]

Somethings gonna fuck you, you know?

The system, the man, Vee.

Can't do nothin' about it.

At least Vee gives you back 10%.

She took my friend.

And you gonna fight her forever?

Stop making things so hard for yourself.

[ Vacuum Whirring ]

[ Woman On PA, indistinct ]

You all right, Chapman?

Yeah.

- Yeah.
- Get to talk to your lawyer?

I talked to one of his partners.
He said that there's, um-

He said that there's
nothing that they can do.

He said prisoners get
transferred all the time.

We got, like, 30 girls up
from Pensacola last year...

when they had that tuberculosis scare.

This isn't that.
This is Fig fucking me personally.

She's hated me ever since
that stupid radio show.

Mmm.

But you-you got connections.

Now, you can fight this.
You got furlough.

I got furlough,
and it's biting me in the ass.

Healy said that there's nothing he can do.

He can't ask for any more special favors
because it would look inappropriate.

She buried me on that list with,
like, a dozen other people.

Ruiz has a new baby.

I'm gonna miss you...
'cause you're a decent person-

Do you know what the worst part of it is?
Telling my family...

and realizing that they actually sounded
kind of relieved...

like they weren't gonna have
to spend hours coming to visit me anymore...

like they finally got their weekends back.

I mean, you should have heard my mother.

She sounded practically cheerful.

“Well...

you only have eight months.

It's not like that's forever.”

Eight months is forever.

It's like the less time you got...

the slower it goes.

All right. I gotta go.

Hey, Morello.

You know, you were the first person that was
nice to me when I got here.

I was really scared.

You made me feel like it was gonna be okay.

Well...

I am gonna remember that you said that...

for my bad days.

[ Woman On PA ]
Early workers, report to storm detail-

What's that supposed to be?

It's a black flag.

International symbol for parley.

And what are we, pirates?

[ Sighs ]
I don't banter. I'm an envoy.

[ Whispers ]
The greenhouse.

After work.

I'll take two chicken noodles
and a, uh, Neosporin.

Fuck you.

[ Fig ]
Nice socks.

Thanks.

I-I'd like to alert you to a couple of line
items that feel a little wonky.

Okay.

For instance, we've got 80 grand here
allocated to Fitzcore for the bathroom repair...

but I thought that was included
in the fee we paid earlier...

for unspecified plumbing services.

This is a much more extensive job.

Right. I get that.

But I feel like there's
some overlap happening.

You're doing great work, Hoffman.

Thanks.

So, I think we should dig into this.

Listen, my husband is having
a fund-raiser tonight.

Why don't you come as my guest, have a
couple cocktails? The wife will love it.

I- I'm pretty sure Tiki Barber
is gonna be there.

How's it going?

What, me? Oh.

Uh, I'm doing okay.
I mean, thanks for asking.

You know, it's actually
not possible for you to ignore me forever.

[ Thunder Rumbles ]

He moved.

I'm sorry. I'm not following.

The baby. He moved.

When? Like now? Now?

This morning, and again after lunch.

- He's really in there.
- [ Chuckles ]

Can I-

Can't feel nothin' on the outside.
He's too small.

[ Mouths Word ]

You're calling it a “he.”

My right boob is larger than the other one.

Gloria says that means he's a boy, and...

I also keep craving salty stuff.

I- You know, I always wanted a boy, like-

[ Man On PA ]
Attention officers, the observation report-

when I pictured it.

H-How do you feel about, um...

Frank as a- as a name?

Frank? Like a hot dog?

Ah, never mind.

[ Woman On Radio ]
Five. We're closing in five.

It could be a girl, I guess.

Yeah.

Yeah, I guess.

Oh, shit.

I seem to recall you saying
that she wasn't going to be a problem.

H-How do you know it was even her?

A child does childish things.

That little broomstick
just cost me serious money.

Who's gonna pay me back?
You?

- Look, I got no part in this.
- But you took responsibility.

You think she'd be in here
trashing my shit if it wasn't for you?

- What are you gonna do to her?
- I'm a businesswoman.

I'm gonna do...

whatever it takes to neutralize the risk.

Don't get crazy, Vee.

She could have an accident.
That's one option.

What's gonna happen then?

The whole place goes on lockdown,
the COs tossin' everything.

That's bad for business.

So what's option two?

Take away her incentive
to fight me, which is you.

I can't have you around here anymore.

But I'm your girl.

I've been loyal to you from day one.

- Ask anyone.
- I know that.

You see,
this whole thing with your friend...

it is bringing me down,
it's attracting attention...

and I can't have it anymore.

I'll talk to her.
I'll tell her to stay away from-

Here, look at this mess. Look at this mess.

She left this for anyone to see.

Now what would have happened if a CO had
come in here before me? Huh?

She would rather have you go to the fuckin'
SHU than see you working for me.

I'm sorry, Taystee.

You said you would protect me.

You said it was me and you together.

I'm sure we'll see each other around.

Yo, who wants hot wings?
[ Laughs ]

Oh, why do you eat that shit?

You know it's a scam to sell off
the trash of the chicken?

Delicious trash.

They used to cut the wings off
and throw them away. Did you know that?

Then somebody figured out
if you smother them in sauce...

you could talk people
into thinking that they were good.

You ever notice-

Girl, you ever notice...

that they don't never put buffalo sauce on
no other chicken parts?

Somebody got up
on the wrong side of the bed.

Yo, hang up the GTA and get in here. RJ!

Thought you were gonna get Thai. You know,
that curry soup with the noodles I like.

We had this conversation.

You said that you didn't trust a man who
wore flip-flops while he cooks.

I'm tired, I guess.
I haven't been sleeping lately.

I told you it was pizza, man.

You worried about somethin'?

[ Chuckles ]
I sell smack.

I'm always worried.

Besides,
my mattress is too hot.

You sure you ain't sick?

No, I'm not sick. Get outta here.

- I never get sick.
- You ain't sick, Vee. You're just old.

I had an aunt who was always
yelling and sweating.

Couldn't remember a damn thing.

Turned out, it was the change.

Oh, my God.

I-I'm too young for that shit.

- I thought I had more time.
- Hey, take it easy now.

Oh, I am 50 years old.

What the fuck have I done with my life?

I should have rent-to-own.
I should have got me a man.

Well, you got us.

How 'bout you put off losing your mind until
you get a good night's sleep...

and then you'll see how you feel then.

Okay, we all know Trance says the first dumb
thing that come to his mind.

Shit, I don't even believe you 50.

You still as fine
as the first day I met you.

[Laughs]
You so full of shit.

You always the smoothest
bullshitter in this house.

I'm serious, Vee.

If you wasn't practically
my mom, I don't know what might happen.

[ Laughing ]

Oh, boy, you better get out of here.

[ RJ Clears Throat ]

You have to talk to her like all the time.

There's all these studies that say that if-

if you don't talk to the baby...

they end up like fucked
by the time they're five.

[ Crying ]
Talk to her.

- [ Baby Cries ]
- Sing to her.

You gotta promise me, okay?

[ Crying ]
You'll read to her while I'm in Virginia.

[ Sniffles ]
All right? I know you don't like to talk...

but you gotta do it for her.

Ah, you hear me, baby girl?

Huh? I'm talking to you.

That's right. I'm talking to you.

You grab daddy's face,
and you make him say shit...

so that you don't end up like me.

Oh, this something new?

You're supposed to keep your hips up.

- Keeps the sperm in.
- [ Chuckles ]

- [ Thunder Rumbles ]
- You should start getting ready.

Hoffman's onto us.

No “onto us” but...

suspicious.

Ah, we're bulletproof on his end.

Just don't make any mistakes.

I don't wanna do this anymore.

It was fun at first,
but now I'm not sleeping.

- [ Sighs ]
- If I got caught, can you imagine?

Jesus, babe, you're getting cold feet now?

You know,
you gotta play dirty if you want to win.

Rowley gets in office,
he drives the whole state off a cliff.

[ Fig ]
I get it.

This is my career we're talking about.

And my career?

[ Sighs ]

Look, you know I totally support you, babe,
in every way.

But you're assistant warden in a prison.

This is the senate.

Think of the doors it will open.

[ Sighs ]

And maybe you'll get pregnant, right?
Who knows?

I held up my end of the deal.

Now you hold up yours.

[ Water Bubbling ]

- [ Water Flowing ]
- What the hell?

Think about it, Vee.

Do you really think
I'd do something so stupid?

No, you're not stupid.

Just pathetic.

To send an old fool to do a job
that you're afraid to do.

That old fool did exactly what
she was supposed to.

Send a warning.

- Fuck with me, I fuck back.
- Really?

'Cause you know what
the message that I got was?

You want a war.

[ Chuckles ]
Except you bungled the first shot.

If she wanted to kill you,
you'd be dead.

Do you- Do you want to go?

You know the sad part is...

I was actually gonna share this with you,
for old time's sake.

But now my feelings are hurt,
so I'm just gonna take it.

Oh, well, I hope you enjoy it.

If your people can find
the other end, of course.

In the woods, in the middle of nowhere.
[ Chuckling ]

How's your son? Yuri, right?

Can you guess how many
Yuri Reznikovs there are...

in a two-hour driving radius of Litchfield?

Come on, guess.

- You're full of shit.
- There's only one.

2364 Kenwood Road.

Or is it 2346? I don't remember.

But my boys tell me it's very nice.

Green house, white trim.

[ Alarm Ringing ]

You touch my son, I touch you.

Every bruise, every mark the same.

You gonna fight me yourself, Red...

or are you gonna send
your little army of midgets...

crones to do it for you, huh?

Norma, you might want to talk some sense
into your friend here.

Remind her of the last time that
she fucked with me.

Broken ribs.
[ Wheezing ]

Punctured lung.
[ Wheezing ]

You're proud of that, are you?

- We were friends.
- We were never friends.

[ Spits ]

You'll regret that.

[ Door Closes ]

What is this? A tea party?

What are you even doing out here?

[ Crazy Eyes ]
We heard the alarm.

It's not the lie-down-on-the-ground alarm.

It's the weather-related-emergency alarm.

Let's go. Get back to the building.

And remind me to give you all shots.

Let's go.

How's your wife?

Eh, she's stressed about the kid.

School wants to hold him back.
She takes that shit personal.

Yeah. Well, maybe you should
take her someplace, you know? Florida.

And who'd look out for my pal Vee?

Tip her off to the action?
Round up her competition?

Your dedication is heartwarming.

We're as close as can be, right?
Till the money runs out.

[ Police Radio Chatter ]

Oh, by the way, we busted
a couple of supply guys across the bridge.

They're bringing in this
cheap shit from India.

Took down the whole setup-
books, cash, everything.

New York's finest.

Your boy RJ was on their drop list.

Same address. I checked.

You ask me, he's going
into business for himself.

Keep it moving,
everyone. Nice and calm, we all stay dry.

Hey, how is rain coming out the toilet?
Can you explain me that?

It's not rain. It's the lake.

The sewer pipes are open,
the lake overflows...

groundwater comes up through all the pipes.

If it come down to swimming,
I'm-a save myself.

I will stand on a bitch's head.

[ Woman On PA ]
Dorm A, C and F, report to the cafeteria.

[ Chattering ]

Wet-Nap? What the fuck am I supposed
to do with this, eat it?

Probably tastes better than this.

Butter pecan, and it's from,
like, two years ago.

We get donations.

You're killing us, Wanda.

Come on. We'll go over there.

You bring your cot?

Could be a long night.
Got anything to help me get through it?

Get away from me,
kibble head. I am not in the mood.

Pretty sure that this qualifies
as unsafe working conditions.

Oh, yeah,
I'm sure OSHA's gonna be all over it.

[ Electrical Buzzing ]

I don't know anything about generators.

The generator's on the roof. Have to get the
pumps working so they'll push fuel up there.

Also, I don't know anything about pumps.

Hey, that's what he said.

Ah, come on, I can't make one stupid joke
before I die from drowning and/or electrocution?

- [ Luschek ] Incoming.
- [ Nicky ] Ah, man.

At least it's dead. Think of his brothers
heading upstairs to get dry.

Okay, so tanks, pumps.
[ Clears Throat ]

- Let's get going. - Oh, man, how come
nobody told me these things were down here?

I-I could have been cornering
the prison-hooch market.

Look at this.
They got taps built-in and everything.

[ Man On Radio, indistinct ]

Uh, Luschek?

There's nothing in here.

What the fuck?

Both empty?

Fig again. Am I right?

[ Electricity Buzzing ]

[ Nicky ]
Now what?

Threesome?

[ Chattering ]

So the irony is that Foucault's
analysis of power structures...

ends up being an argument against the
institutions of social inequality.

We talk about this all the time in the locker
room. I don't know why this is so difficult.

[ Laughs ] So then Jason says, “Let me
talk to her.” I know, right?

But he will not be swayed,
so I put him on...

and he sits there on
the phone with her for 20 minutes.

I counted. Just listens
to her whole story...

about the building permits and
the whole thing with the snakes...

and I do not know how he does it, but I
swear to God, at the end of that conversation...

she writes him a check for $30.

And that's when I knew,
this man belongs in Albany.

- Sorry, I-I need her for a minute.
- Oh, I'm so sorry.

Excuse me. It's good to see you.

Thank you, God. If I have
to tell that story one more time-

Joe Caputo again.

- This makes call number six.
- It's like having children.

I swear, can't Mama have one night out?

I guess I should call him back.

Fitzcore just got here.

Oh. Good, we need this guy to pony up.

Bob.

So glad you made it.

Randy, Michelle,
I'm so sorry about the rain.

I'm disappointed, Natalie.
I thought for sure you'd figure out...

how to put the weather off
until after tonight.

- I could do it right now, but it'd cost you extra.
- [ Laughs ]

I'm not complaining about the storm.
Trust me.

It's like money falling from the sky.

I'm guessing that prison of yours is gonna
need some very expensive repairs.

I am guessing you're right.

- Lobster slider?
- Yes, please.

- [ Chattering ]
- [ Thunder Rumbling ]

This way.

Ah. Here.

We keep the fence between us,
but we can all see each other. No surprises.

You think she's gonna jump you tonight...

in front of five COs and 200 witnesses?

This is not a sane person
we are dealing with.

Oh, man.

I mean, the spirit is willing
and everything like that...

but we got a serious problem in terms of
weight class, you know what I'm saying?

We don't have the muscle,
so we've got to be smarter.

Great, we'll challenge them
to a sudoku contest.

Watch your tone, Gina.

I want eyes on her all night.

She doesn't move without us
knowing about it. Sleep in shifts.

If you go somewhere, take a body.

We supposed to be fightin' them?

[Scoffs]
'Cause that's the Lollipop Guild over there.

I don't know. Red's bringing
all kinds of shit from the outside.

I hear she got a Taser
hidden away for just in case.

Where exactly you think she hiding it?
In her coochie?

Taser would fit right in there.

Red's not a fighter. She's a schemer.

She makes a move,
it'll take us a week to figure out it's her.

Keep your eyes open.

Don't talk to anyone that isn't us.

All right, listen up!

This building's pipes
are now compromised by water...

meaning there is absolutely
no working plumbing whatsoever.

[ All ]
Ah!

So for the time being...

you're gonna answer nature's call
in the honey bucket.

- [ Woman ] Are you serious?
- [ All ] Ah, man.

Four others like it down the hallway.

You check with the CO at the door...

you do your business,
you put the lid back on.

Once it's halfway full,
last person dumps it outside.

- [ All ] Oh!
- Brings it back.

What if you gotta number two?

You don't. Keep it clenched, ladies.

Don't be the one to ruin it for everybody.

[ Brook ]
This is so great in a way, you know?

No separate dorms. No walls between us.

Like we're all just women
having the shared experience of deprivation.

Like the hunger strike but bigger.

Oh, my God,
we should totally have a sing-along.

♪ I hate the world today ♪

♪ You're so good to me, I know,
but I can't change ♪

♪ Tried to tell you, but you look at me
like maybe I'm an angel underneath ♪

Boop, boop, boop.
♪ Innocent and sweet ♪

♪ Yesterday I cried ♪

- ♪ Must have been relieved to
see the softer side ♪ - [ Laughs ]

♪ I can understand
how you'd be so confused ♪

- ♪ I don't envy you ♪
- Nutmeg.

- Nutmeg.
- ♪ I'm a little bit of everything ♪

♪ All rolled into one ♪

- Nutmeg!
- Bing-fucking-go.

♪ I'm a child, I'm a mother,
I'm a sinner, I'm a saint ♪

- ♪ I do not feel ashamed ♪♪
- Whoa.

- [ Coughs ]
- [ Snickers ]

- How much we got to eat to get gibbled?
- I don't know. A lot.

- Hey, Mr. Healy.
- Hey.

- How are you?
- Good. How are you?

- Good. Do you have any snacks?
- Sure. Sure. Come on.

- Take a seat in the trauma counseling center.
- [ Laughs ]

So, is the storm scaring you?

Making you feel out of control?

Not at all. I just feel, like, hungry,
like, for some snacks.

Yeah.

We got some snack food here.

- Oh, yes! Thank you.
- You're welcome.

You want some water?
It's-It's important to hydrate.

No, no, no, no. There's this whole bucket
situation that I'm trying to avoid.

Um, hey...

is it- is it okay
if I take a few of these for my neighbor?

'Cause she's a lesbian.

I just want to, like, distract her.

Wh-Which lesbian is that?

With the fat stomach and the haircut.

Black?
She's, like, the worst one.

No, she's white. You know
you can't say that shit around here.

- Trust me.
- No. No, no, no.

You're talking about Boo.

“Black” is her last name.

You should stay away from her.

You think I can't handle myself?

I will say this. She's got some sick, like,
tattoos, like her ink.

- Have you seen it?
- That's how they get you.

Being cool, doing cool things...

and before you know it,
you're part of their agenda.

- What?
- [ Drawer Opening ]

You know, you should read this book.

It's called The End of Men.

In it, they talk about how
pretty soon men are gonna become irrelevant.

Now women are more educated, they're gonna make
more money and pretty much run everything.

- Really?
-Mmm.

Well, then, who would,
like, be the president?

Exactly.

It's the lesbians
that started this whole thing.

They're making babies out of a tube.

That's why they're walking around all the
time like they're better.

Waiting for us to go obsolete.

That's what they're doing.

No offense, but, uh...

men being in charge
has never done me any good.

Well, are you eating free cookies?

- Yes. - You should think about
that before you get ideas.

[ All ]
♪ You say ♪

♪ I only hear what I want to ♪

♪ I don't listen hard ♪

♪ I don't pay attention to the
distance that you're running ♪

♪ To anyone, anywhere ♪

♪ I don't understand
if you really care ♪

♪ I'm only hearing negative ♪

♪ No, no, no, no ♪

- ♪ So I turned the radio on ♪
- [ Laughs ]

- ♪ I turned the radio up and this woman
was singing my song ♪ - [ Laughing ]

♪ The lover's in love
and the other's run away ♪

♪ The lover is crying
'cause the other won't stay ♪

- Boo! - ♪ Some of us hover when
we're weeping for the other ♪

♪ Who was dying
since the day they were born ♪

♪ Well, this is not that
I think that I'm throwing, but I'm thrown ♪

[ Knocking ]

- [ Knocking Continues ]
- Yo, hold the fuck on.

Who the fuck is this?

[ Sighs ]

I've been hearing some very troubling shit
on the street about you, my young friend.

- Come on, Vee, it's late.
- [ Chuckles ] Damn.

You got some nice shit up in here.

- Is that a new TV?
- What if it is?

Yeah? I don't remember handing you
this kind of cash.

- Got a friend that hooks me up.
- A friend, huh?

'Cause what I hear-

that you been going into business
for yourself on the sly.

My customers.

My corners.

Yo, look, Vee,
I've been running for you a long time.

Right? You took me out of foster
and raised me from a kid.

But I'm grown now.

It's time for me to go out on my own.

So you want to compete with me
on my own fucking turf, you motherfucker!

Come on, now, Vee!
Think I'm gonna play you hard like that?

Look, I'm sorry, okay?
I should have told you.

I guess I was kind of scared.

You know, but how's this?

I-I'll give you a percentage.

Whatever you want. Look, I ain't trying
to game you, Vee, I swear.

It hurts me you even thinking I would.

Come on now.

Okay.

Shit. Okay.

[ Chuckles ]

Oh, goddamn, I must be going soft.

'Cause you always were my favorite.

- Yeah, I kind of got that feeling.
- Yeah.

Ever since you were a little boy.

But you're a man now.

[ Sighs ]
Yes, I am.

A man who loves his mama.

[ Thunder Rumbling ]

[ Crying ]

Hey.

You know...

I'm being transferred too.

So at least we'll know each other.

We don't know each other.

I know. I just meant
at least we'll both be from the same place.

[ Scoffs ]

And I can see why you wouldn't
give a shit about that.

How much time do you have?

- Six years.
- Fuck.

I saw you with your boyfriend.

Seems like he loves you a lot, huh?

Fuck him.

[ Crying ]

I'm gonna come home finally...

my baby will be in the first grade calling
some other puta “Mommy.”

Men can't help it.

They're weak.

Okay. Bam. Bam.

- [ Groans ]
- [ Chuckles ]

- Hey
- Hmm?

How's this whole “agenda” thing work?

I got a lot of those. Specify.

The-The gay agenda to take over the world.

Okay.

First of all, keep your voice down.

This shit is top secret.

Are you gonna let all the men die out?

Oh, fuck, no. We need slaves.

You know, bookkeeping, janitorial,
fetch-and-carry, that kind of shit.

Yeah. What about for sex?

'Cause I know I like how they
smell kind of funky...

and they're big
and they have dicks and all that.

Well...

maybe.

But when you're done,
you got to toss them away like trash.

I mean, the whole point of this is chicks
digging each other and being in charge.

Let's say I want to join, right?

Okay, let's say that.

[ Woman On Radio ] All available staff
please report to the main west room.

Would I have to do anything disgusting
against the word of God?

You know?

I'm talking about eating pussy,
if you catch my drift.

Yeah, I hear you.

And that is a big part of it.
I'm not gonna lie.

But since you have these
religious convictions...

eh, probably give you an exemption.

- I mean, we're not unreasonable.
- Really?

- Mm-hmm.
- That'd be great.

Of course, you're still gonna have
to go through the initiation.

- Yeah, I figured.
- Yeah.

Fuck, marry, kill.

Caputo, Bennett, O'Neill.

Shit, that's easy, girl.
I'd love to get me a piece of that Bennett.

- Ooh.
- Even with the stumpy stump?

Girl, that's when the shit gets interesting.

It's dudes like that think
they doing you a favor.

- Mm-hmm.
- I'd fuck Caputo.

- [ Crazy Eyes ] Mmm. Huh.
- Yeah. I like me a mustache.

Tickles in a good way. Oh.

And he always be looking so sad.

Bet he work extra hard.

[ Moaning ]

[ All Laughing ]

[ Woman ]
Yep.

[ Taystee ]
Yo, I got one.

Fuck, marry, kill.

The Huxtables.

You know,
we're kind of busy right now.

Y'all ain't even gonna talk to me?

She said she'd move me back to sales.

- I didn't even do nothing.
- We're busy.

[ Sighs ]
There's too many people in here.

[ Breathes Deeply ]
It's making the air feel weird.

- Just mostly farts.
- No.

It's like I can't breathe.

[ Breathes Deeply ]

[ Panting ]

I can't breathe.

[ Panting ]
My baby can't breathe.

- Turn on the lights.
- There's no lights. It's gonna be okay.

- I gotta get out of here. I gotta get out of here.
- Shh!

- I can't breathe.
- Shh!

- I can't breathe!
- Shh! Shh! It's okay.

You picked up.

I guess 11 is my lucky number.

Why are you calling?

Because it's pitch black...

and people are pissing in buckets...

and when I say “people,”
I'm also talking about me.

The electric gate won't open...

there's a river running through
the fucking laundry-

The roads are washed out.
What do you expect me to do right now?

- Do I hear light jazz?
- Yes, you do, Joe.

Because I am at a cocktail party
on the Upper West Side...

drinking Sazeracs with the New York Giants.

Is that what you wanted to hear?

I am sorry,
but you're gonna have to ride this shit out.

We will talk about it in the morning.

Oh, I guarantee we're gonna talk about it.

We are gonna talk about
how your shitty excuse for management...

has fucked me for the last fucking time.

You think you could do a better job?

'Cause if we look at the evidence from, say,
the last few weeks-

I'm saying that maybe
someone who came up a different path...

from warden's secretary...

who kissed ass and gave neck massages...

might have remembered
to order diesel for the backup genny.

Okay.

So we will be discussing
the future of your career with the DOC...

when I get back, but for now, I need you
to suck it the fuck up...

ride this out, stop crying...

- and stop calling me.
- [ Beeps]

H-H-Hello?

Five minutes left for the silent auction!

Think of a happy place. Someplace nice, like
a beautiful beach or, like, a mountain.

Does she like beaches or mountains?

- [ Panting ]
- She likes the comic book store on Morris Park.

Okay, yeah. So comics.
There's comics everywhere.

A sea of comics as far as your eye can see.

A cocoon of comic books.
They're comforting you.

- On your feet, Diaz.
- [ Crying, Panting ]

- Hey, come on, man, she's not doing well.
- I said get up.

Do you really
have to be a dick right now?

- Jumping jacks. Twenty. Go.
- I can't.

Are you defying an officer?

Do it.

[ Crying, Panting ]

One, two, three-

You gonna do something?

I'm gonna get Caputo.

- Out loud.
- Six, seven, eight...

nine-

Keep breathin'. Count your breaths.

[ Breathing Slows ]
Yeah, okay.

[ Breathing Normally ]

Incoming.

- Can I help?
- It's PB&J. I feel like I got this.

You're putting the jelly
too close to the edges.

You got to even it out, or it leaks.

I-Is this happening?

- What do you want?
- Nothing.

Practically nothing.

You've got the keys to the knife cage?

Just drop them on the ground,
find them again later.

It's an easy mistake.

It's for self-defense.

And when a knife comes up missing, what do
you think's gonna happen to me?

“Oh, she lost the keys...

so let's go easy on her ass.”

She's going to kill me, Mendoza.

In front of the whole prison?
Man, you are paranoid as shit.

Fine. Forget the knife.

Just give me something sharp.

The cheese grater.

You used to be something.
You know that, Red?

Now you lost your damn mind.

And it's sad.

She don't need to fight you.

'Cause she already won.

[ Snoring ]

Miss Rosa?

Oh, geez. Uh, hey. Hey.

- I'm not dead yet-
- [ Sighs ]

If that's what's itching you.

No. No. I thought that-

I mean, I know it's not looking so good.

It's not the dying that's the bad part.

It's that I gotta do it here, you know?

The last thing I'm gonna see
is you assholes.

You scared me for a minute there.

What's gonna happen when she's born?

Um...

probably let
your mom's family take her.

I can go see her sometimes.

And then what?

You gonna tell her you're her daddy?

But she needs to keep her mouth shut...

because everybody thinks
that she has a different daddy?

And that daddy's in jail
because he put his dick in Mommy.

But be cool.

I should never have given you
that gum, should I?

You did a lot of stupid things.

And so did I. It was both of us.

But it doesn't matter anymore.

We have to do what's best for the kid.

Which is what?

Confess.

- And go to prison?
- Yeah.

Go to prison. Do your time.

I'll tell them I love you.

We'll both get out in a few years.

We're done with this place.

We're a family.

Or...

walk away.

I won't blame you.

Get a fresh start.

It's like this never happened.

This whole mess is on Mendez.

My baby won't grow up confused.

You think I'm the kind of man that
walks away from my kid?

Dummy.

You got a chance right now
to go back in time.

If someone gave that to me...

I would sure as hell be thinking about it.

Do you ever think about
why we wear clothes all the time?

Like, really think about it?

I feel trapped inside my face.

We got three inches of water in the bunks.

And now the water's coming
in under the library door.

- Yo, what about the books?
- What about 'em?

They'll get ruined.

Yo, that shit's worth money.
You know how pissed they'd be upstairs?

Go on. Get 'em up on a high shelf.
I'll check on you in a few.

And- And take a buddy.

You.

Yeah,
you know the library. Go with her.

And pull the expensive stuff first.

[ Yoga ]
Roll up.

Ooh.
[ Exhales ]

Stress goes right to the spine.

How's Sister?

Still in Medical...

being force-fed presumably.

- She makes me ashamed of myself.
- It is not her.

It's Fig again.

Who does that to an old lady?

They always win one way or another.

And if they can't...

they just transfer us away.

I'm so scared.

It's so cold on the plane.

And the men, they just stare.

Then you get off, and you're in this place
where you don't know anyone.

I spent five months at Alderson.

Was it like here?

It was awesome.

I mean, as far as being deprived of your
personal freedom and civil liberties goes.

They had a crafts shop
and a volleyball team.

I had Martha Stewart's old bunk.

[ Rat Squeaking ]

This place is bullshit.

[ Raining, Thunder Rumbles ]

[ Shouts ]

[ Choking ]

You got more balls than I thought.

Who's pathetic now?

Oh!

- [ Grunting ]
- [ Gasping ]

[ Choking, Coughs ]

- [ Grunting ]
- [ Gasping ]

Oh, God!

All right. All right.

[ Sighing, Gasping ]

This place is getting to me.

Oh, yeah.

You just tried to strangle me
with plastic wrap...

so that you can sell mascara in jail.

[ Laughing, Crying ]

Oh.

This is stupid.

- Fuck.
- Take what you want.

What do I care? What am I trying to prove?

You keep yours,
I'll keep mine, all right?

We've got enough
fucking hell in here already.

Truce.

Truce.

Couldn't try to kill me someplace drier?

[ Panting ]

Oh, God.

Oh, you know what I want right now?

- What?
- Oh, God, a Bomb Pop.

Oh.
[ Laughs ]

I need a fucking Popsicle.

Red, white and blue. Very patriotic.

- You feeling patriotic now?
- Uh-huh.

Come on, now, remember what I taught you-
always treat your lady like a queen.

You go get it for me...

I might let you do that last thing again.

- ♪♪ [ Hip-hop ]
- ♪ Messing with the wrong kids, Michael ♪

♪ It ain't Jackson ♪

- Fuck.
- Go on now.

♪ Laws of attraction
For future generation's information ♪

♪ The black one ♪

♪ Move the crowd like a Buddha cloud
The purple ♪

♪ Puff, puff, pass
round the circle ♪

- [ Vee ] Thank you, baby.
- Yeah.

♪ The computer's down
Urkel ♪

♪ Emcee a show via Wi-Fi ♪

♪ And paid way before
we wrap it up like tie-dye ♪

Mmm.

♪ He had the eye of the tiger ♪

♪ Do the math like a fry guy ♪

♪ Just made a baby home
Make dome ♪

♪ Check left
Some folks ancestor home wreck ♪

♪ With blown backs
These lesser known facts thwart evil ♪

♪ You got no reason
Like short people ♪

♪ No offense On the
street It turned glass ♪

♪ On his lucky rat's paw
in the trapdoor ♪!

[ Beeping ]

♪ Logic to keep your mind
in the project ♪

♪ Drop the check
His job is to chop neck ♪

What's up, RJ?

I ain't done nothin', man.
I'm just going to get ice cream.

- That's it.
- Catch.

- The fuck?
- I got a runner on the steps at McMullen Park.

African-American male,
early 20s, armed and aggressive.

- Request backup.
- Oh, no. Please don't do this, man.

- Please, Officer, don't.
- [ Radio, Indistinct ]

You gonna help or just stand there
creepin' me out?

Fuck you.

So what's Vee gonna do to me?

She ain't gonna do nothing to you.

[ Scoffs ]
Right.

She threw me out.

That's what you wanted, ain't it?

You win.

The only person that ever looked out for me
in my entire life- You got her back to turn.

The only person?

Fuck you.

You ruined everything.

You- You couldn't just be my friend.

You gotta-
You gotta go turn it wrong.

- You gotta- wanna take off my clothes.
- Oh, God.

- When did I ever say a word to you about-
- You said-

You said plenty of words.

You couldn't let me have
one damn thing to myself.

She's not a good person, Taystee.

I don't care.

You fucked up my life.

[ Scoffs ]
I'm done.

Oh, you just gonna walk away now too?

Get the-
[ Grunts ]

[ Crying ]

Hey.

[ Both Crying ]

Oh, my God. Oh, God.

- Oh, God.
- [Crying Continues]

I'm sorry, P.

- I'm sorry.
- I know.

- I'm sorry.
- I know. I know.

[ Crying Continues ]

[ Snoring ]

[ Gasps ]

[ Gasps ]

You want to explain?

- ♪♪ [ Light Jazz ]
- [ Chattering ]

[ Sighs ]

[ Groans ]

- [ Thud ]
- Oh!

Oh!

[ Woman ]
♪ Wrap my heart in cellophane ♪

♪ Keep it dry ♪

♪ When it rains ♪

♪ And maybe that way ♪

♪ I'll keep it safe from you ♪

♪ Masquerading ♪

♪ I watch the shadows play ♪

♪ On your opaque face ♪

♪ But sparks fly
from your cobalt eyes ♪

♪ And I can see through
your disguises ♪

♪ Wrap our hearts
in cellophane ♪

♪ Keep them dry ♪

♪ When it rains ♪

♪ And maybe that way ♪

♪ We 'll keep them safe ♪♪

♪♪ [ Vocalizing ]

♪♪ [ Ends ]

Ripped By mstoll