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1
00:00:03,434 --> 00:00:05,695
YO-O-O, JOE!
2
00:00:05,782 --> 00:00:08,391
♪ HE'LL FIGHT FOR FREEDOM
WHEREVER THERE'S TROUBLE ♪
3
00:00:08,478 --> 00:00:10,652
♪ G.I. JOE IS THERE
4
00:00:10,739 --> 00:00:13,652
♪ G.I. JOE,
A REAL AMERICAN HERO ♪
5
00:00:13,739 --> 00:00:16,086
♪ G.I. JOE IS THERE
6
00:00:16,173 --> 00:00:19,217
♪ IT'S G.I. JOE
AGAINST COBRA THE ENEMY ♪
7
00:00:19,304 --> 00:00:21,565
♪ FIGHTING TO SAVE THE DAY
8
00:00:21,652 --> 00:00:24,260
♪ HE NEVER GIVES UP,
HE'S ALWAYS THERE ♪
9
00:00:24,347 --> 00:00:27,260
♪ FIGHTING FOR FREEDOM
OVER LAND AND AIR ♪
10
00:00:27,347 --> 00:00:30,608
♪ G.I. JOE,
A REAL AMERICAN HERO ♪
11
00:00:30,695 --> 00:00:34,043
♪ G.I. JOE IS THERE
12
00:00:34,130 --> 00:00:36,173
G.I. JOE IS THE CODE NAME
13
00:00:36,260 --> 00:00:39,086
FOR AMERICA'S DARING, HIGHLY
TRAINED SPECIAL-MISSION FORCE.
14
00:00:39,173 --> 00:00:42,652
ITS PURPOSE -- TO DEFEND
HUMAN FREEDOM AGAINST COBRA,
15
00:00:42,739 --> 00:00:44,695
A RUTHLESS
TERRORIST ORGANIZATION
16
00:00:44,782 --> 00:00:47,043
DETERMINED TO RULE THE WORLD.
17
00:00:47,130 --> 00:00:48,347
♪ HE NEVER GIVES UP
18
00:00:48,434 --> 00:00:49,913
♪ HE'LL STAY
TILL THE FIGHT'S WON ♪
19
00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:51,956
♪ G.I. JOE WILL DARE
20
00:00:52,043 --> 00:00:55,130
♪ G.I. JOE,
A REAL AMERICAN HERO ♪
21
00:00:55,217 --> 00:01:00,000
♪ G.I. JOE
22
00:01:10,695 --> 00:01:12,565
[ ANIMAL CHITTERS ]
23
00:01:19,173 --> 00:01:21,347
DOESN'T LOOK LIKE MUCH
OF A COBRA BASE TO ME, DUKE.
24
00:01:21,434 --> 00:01:23,913
THE NERVE CENTER'S PROBABLY
UNDERGROUND, BEACH HEAD.
25
00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:25,173
WHO CARES WHERE
IT IS?
26
00:01:25,260 --> 00:01:27,173
I'M JUST GLAD TO BE
BACK IN ACTION.
27
00:01:27,260 --> 00:01:29,217
HEH. WHY DO PEOPLE
SAY "ACTION"
28
00:01:29,304 --> 00:01:30,739
WHEN THEY MEAN
"VIOLENCE"?
29
00:01:30,826 --> 00:01:33,173
OKAY. LET'S GO
HACKER HUNTIN'.
30
00:01:33,260 --> 00:01:35,739
HACKERS, HUH?
31
00:01:35,826 --> 00:01:38,826
KNEW A FAMILY NAMED, UH,
HACKER ONCE.
32
00:01:38,913 --> 00:01:40,565
PRETTY NICE PEOPLE.
33
00:01:40,652 --> 00:01:42,869
THESE HACKERS ARE
COBRA COMPUTER EXPERTS.
34
00:01:42,956 --> 00:01:45,000
DIDN'T YOU READ
THE INTELLIGENCE REPORT?
35
00:01:45,086 --> 00:01:47,391
I DON'T READ
INTELLIGENCE REPORTS.
36
00:01:47,478 --> 00:01:49,173
GETS ME RILED UP.
37
00:01:49,260 --> 00:01:51,000
Mainframe:
COBRA'S DOING SOMETHING
38
00:01:51,086 --> 00:01:53,043
WITH SOFTWARE AND DECODER BOXES.
39
00:01:53,130 --> 00:01:55,347
SO FAR, THIS IS TURNING OUT
TO BE AS SIMPLE
40
00:01:55,434 --> 00:01:57,869
AS PROGRAMMING IN BASIC.
41
00:02:01,391 --> 00:02:03,956
[ BEEPING ]
42
00:02:06,086 --> 00:02:08,608
INTRUDER ALERT!
CODE RED!
43
00:02:14,217 --> 00:02:16,000
Mainframe:
LOOKS LIKE COBRA'S RUNNING
44
00:02:16,086 --> 00:02:18,000
AN INTERNATIONAL
MAIL-ORDER BUSINESS.
45
00:02:18,086 --> 00:02:19,869
Beach Head:
HMPH. LIKE WHAT?
46
00:02:19,956 --> 00:02:22,000
THE SNAKE OF THE MONTH CLUB?
47
00:02:22,086 --> 00:02:23,304
[ DOORS OPEN ]
HEADS UP!
48
00:02:23,391 --> 00:02:24,695
SNAKE-PUSS IS ONTO US!
49
00:02:24,782 --> 00:02:26,521
VIPERS!
50
00:02:26,608 --> 00:02:27,782
[ LASER FIRE ]
51
00:02:29,869 --> 00:02:32,521
[ VIPERS GRUNTING, GROANING ]
52
00:02:33,608 --> 00:02:35,869
COME ON!
53
00:02:39,304 --> 00:02:40,391
YOU WON'T BELIEVE THIS.
54
00:02:40,478 --> 00:02:42,782
COBRA'S GONE INTO PAY TV.
55
00:02:42,869 --> 00:02:45,304
HERE'S ONE OF THE DECODER BOXES
I TOLD YOU ABOUT.
56
00:02:45,391 --> 00:02:47,217
HMM. THAT'S WEIRD.
57
00:02:47,304 --> 00:02:49,869
OKAY, MAINFRAME,
LET'S CHECK THIS OUT.
58
00:02:54,913 --> 00:02:56,217
COMPUTER PRINTOUTS?
59
00:02:56,304 --> 00:02:57,130
YEAH.
60
00:02:57,217 --> 00:02:58,956
REAL AMATEUR STUFF,
THOUGH.
61
00:02:59,043 --> 00:03:00,956
COME ON! TAKE IT WITH YOU!
62
00:03:06,434 --> 00:03:07,913
STAY BACK!
63
00:03:10,260 --> 00:03:14,521
Sci-Fi: 'PEARS YOU'VE GOT
PIRANHA PROBLEMS.
64
00:03:14,608 --> 00:03:19,260
WHEN I ASK A QUESTION,
I DEMAND AN ANSWER RIGHT NOW!
65
00:03:19,347 --> 00:03:21,913
WE SAID IN OUR REPORT...
...YOUR HIGHNESS...
66
00:03:22,000 --> 00:03:24,478
...A COMPUTER VIRUS...
...CAN BE AS DANGEROUS
67
00:03:24,565 --> 00:03:26,826
TO A COMPUTER...
...AS AN ORGANIC VIRUS IS...
68
00:03:26,913 --> 00:03:29,173
Both:
...TO THE HUMAN BODY.
69
00:03:29,260 --> 00:03:31,521
WE'VE PREPARED
A DEMONSTRATION.
70
00:03:33,521 --> 00:03:37,913
Mindbender: A VIRUS IS A PROGRAM
SECRETLY SLIPPED INTO A COMPUTER
71
00:03:38,000 --> 00:03:41,260
TO LIE THERE, DORMANT,
UNDETECTED,
72
00:03:41,347 --> 00:03:46,130
UNTIL ACTIVATED UNDER A SET
OF PREDETERMINED CONDITIONS...
73
00:03:46,217 --> 00:03:48,173
...WHEREUPON THE PROGRAM
REQUIRES MORE...
74
00:03:48,260 --> 00:03:50,304
...AND MORE...
...OF THE COMPUTER'S MEMORY...
75
00:03:50,391 --> 00:03:51,304
...AND POWER...
76
00:03:51,391 --> 00:03:53,043
Both:
...TO RUN IT.
77
00:03:53,130 --> 00:03:57,826
Mindbender:
UNTIL ALL THE MEMORY IS USED UP
78
00:03:57,913 --> 00:04:01,521
AND THE SYSTEM OVERLOADS.
79
00:04:01,608 --> 00:04:05,347
NOT ALL VIRUSES
CREATE SUCH DESTRUCTION,
80
00:04:05,434 --> 00:04:09,391
BUT AS YOU CAN SEE,
MINE DOES.
81
00:04:09,478 --> 00:04:11,956
[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
82
00:04:12,043 --> 00:04:14,217
AND THIS, DR. MINDBENDER,
83
00:04:14,304 --> 00:04:18,521
IS HOW YOU PROPOSE TO CRIPPLE
THE ENTIRE COMPUTER NETWORK
84
00:04:18,608 --> 00:04:21,173
OF THE INTERNATIONAL POLICE?
85
00:04:21,260 --> 00:04:23,304
IN LESS THAN 15 MINUTES,
86
00:04:23,391 --> 00:04:27,130
COBRA COULD PLUNGE THE FREE
WORLD'S LAW-ENFORCEMENT AGENCIES
87
00:04:27,217 --> 00:04:30,260
INTO UTTER CHAOS.
88
00:04:44,913 --> 00:04:46,956
FRAG THOSE CEILING SUPPORTS!
89
00:04:58,695 --> 00:05:00,391
[ GRUNTING ]
90
00:05:00,478 --> 00:05:02,608
YOU -- YOU KNOW I WON'T --
91
00:05:02,695 --> 00:05:05,173
WON'T TOUCH A WEAPON, SCI-FI.
92
00:05:05,260 --> 00:05:09,347
THIS AIN'T NO TIME TO BE SO
ALL-FIRED PRINCIPLED, LIFELINE.
93
00:05:09,434 --> 00:05:11,739
GRAB ON!
94
00:05:13,521 --> 00:05:15,043
WHY, LIFELINE,
95
00:05:15,130 --> 00:05:18,434
YOU'D DENY THEM CUTE LITTLE
CRITTERS JUST A TINY TASTE?
96
00:05:18,521 --> 00:05:19,956
[ CHUCKLES ]
97
00:05:20,043 --> 00:05:21,869
[ MACHINERY WHIRRING ]
LOOK!
98
00:05:24,043 --> 00:05:24,956
WHAT'S HAPPENING?
99
00:05:34,521 --> 00:05:37,217
WE'LL COME BACK FOR THEM.
BUT OUR FIRST PRIORITY
100
00:05:37,304 --> 00:05:39,695
IS GETTING THIS STUFF
BACK TO JOE HEADQUARTERS.
101
00:05:39,782 --> 00:05:43,043
SO MUCH FOR A ROUTINE
RECONNAISSANCE MISSION.
102
00:05:43,130 --> 00:05:44,000
HMM.
103
00:05:44,086 --> 00:05:46,086
HOW MUCH WILL THIS COST ME?
104
00:05:46,173 --> 00:05:47,521
ONLY A PITTANCE.
105
00:05:47,608 --> 00:05:50,695
A MERE $5 BILLION.
106
00:05:50,782 --> 00:05:52,347
$5 BILLION?!
107
00:05:52,434 --> 00:05:54,739
BY THE SERPENT GODS
OF THE NETHERWORLD!
108
00:05:54,826 --> 00:05:58,826
HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME
TO RAISE $5 BILLION?!
109
00:05:58,913 --> 00:06:00,695
WITH A TELETHON.
110
00:06:00,782 --> 00:06:02,913
A COBRATHON,
TO BE EXACT.
111
00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:07,304
THE TWINS OVERESTIMATED
THE COST AT $5 BILLION,
112
00:06:07,391 --> 00:06:08,739
YOUR EXCELLENCY.
113
00:06:08,826 --> 00:06:10,434
CRIMINALS EVERYWHERE
114
00:06:10,521 --> 00:06:13,565
WOULD CONTRIBUTE GENEROUSLY...
...TO SEE INTERPOL'S COMPUTERS
115
00:06:13,652 --> 00:06:14,956
WIPED OUT.
116
00:06:15,043 --> 00:06:19,130
WE'VE EVEN ARRANGED
SOME GUEST ENTERTAINMENT.
117
00:06:19,217 --> 00:06:21,086
[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
118
00:06:21,173 --> 00:06:23,739
HMM. INTERESTING.
119
00:06:23,826 --> 00:06:27,086
BUT WILL IT ACTUALLY COST
$5 BILLION?
120
00:06:27,173 --> 00:06:30,130
NO. IN FACT, THE COST IS FAR,
FAR LESS.
121
00:06:30,217 --> 00:06:33,434
BUT BY SETTING OUR PLEDGE GOAL
AT $5 BILLION,
122
00:06:33,521 --> 00:06:36,652
NOT ONLY WILL WE RECOUP
THE COST OF DEVELOPING THE VIRUS
123
00:06:36,739 --> 00:06:40,000
BUT WE'LL MAKE
A HUGE PROFIT BESIDES.
124
00:06:40,086 --> 00:06:41,478
EXCELLENT!
125
00:06:41,565 --> 00:06:44,347
ALL AGENTS OF COBRA
SHALL ASSIST YOU.
126
00:06:44,434 --> 00:06:46,782
THIS I COMMAND!
127
00:06:49,260 --> 00:06:51,347
UH, I-IT SHOULDN'T BE
TOO MUCH LONGER NOW, UH,
128
00:06:51,434 --> 00:06:52,695
GENERAL HAWK, SIR.
129
00:06:52,782 --> 00:06:54,000
DON'T GET FLUSTERED, SON.
130
00:06:54,086 --> 00:06:55,782
WE'RE ALL JOES HERE.
131
00:06:59,000 --> 00:07:00,434
AND KEEP THE PHONES BUSY,
132
00:07:00,521 --> 00:07:04,826
DARLINGS, AND THE NUMBERS
ON THE TOTE BOARD CLIMBING!
133
00:07:04,913 --> 00:07:08,695
WITH YOUR HELP,
THE FIRST ANNUAL COBRA TELETHON
134
00:07:08,782 --> 00:07:12,608
WILL REACH ITS $5 BILLION GOAL!
135
00:07:12,695 --> 00:07:13,826
TELETHON?
136
00:07:13,913 --> 00:07:16,304
WHAT IN THE NAME OF SAM HILL
IS THIS?
137
00:07:16,391 --> 00:07:17,739
BEATS ME, SIR.
138
00:07:17,826 --> 00:07:21,478
IT'S A ROGUE BROADCAST
NOT ON ANY ASSIGNED FREQUENCY.
139
00:07:21,565 --> 00:07:22,869
BUT WE ARE NOT HERE MERELY
140
00:07:22,956 --> 00:07:24,782
TO, UH, PICK YOUR POCKETS.
141
00:07:24,869 --> 00:07:28,478
WE ARE HERE TO PUT ON A SHOW,
DARLINGS!
142
00:07:28,565 --> 00:07:30,391
WHERE'S THIS COMING FROM,
SON?
143
00:07:30,478 --> 00:07:32,130
I'M TRYING TO GET A FIX,
SIR.
144
00:07:32,217 --> 00:07:34,478
...ELIMINATE THESE
FINE YOUNG SPECIMENS
145
00:07:34,565 --> 00:07:37,217
OF AMERICAN ELITE
ANTI-COBRA FORCE.
146
00:07:37,304 --> 00:07:39,521
YES, BUT ELIMINATE THEM
147
00:07:39,608 --> 00:07:42,086
IN THE MOST ENTERTAINING
MANNER POSSIBLE.
148
00:07:42,173 --> 00:07:45,130
SO, IN KEEPING
WITH OUR SURROUNDINGS,
149
00:07:45,217 --> 00:07:49,000
WE SHALL ALLOW A GAME OF CHANCE
TO DETERMINE THEIR FATES.
150
00:07:49,086 --> 00:07:50,347
DESTRO?
151
00:07:52,608 --> 00:07:54,391
Flint:
LIFELINE. SCI-FI!
152
00:07:54,478 --> 00:07:56,521
SO THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED
TO THEM.
153
00:07:56,608 --> 00:07:58,739
BUT WHERE ARE DUKE
AND THE OTHERS?
154
00:07:58,826 --> 00:08:01,043
SPIN THE WHEELS!
155
00:08:07,043 --> 00:08:11,000
ROUND AND ROUND AND ROUND
GO THE G.I. JOES!
156
00:08:11,086 --> 00:08:16,217
AND HOW THEY END UP,
NO ONE KNOWS...YET!
157
00:08:22,173 --> 00:08:25,565
DIAL TONE, GET THAT SIGNAL
BACK NOW!
158
00:08:40,608 --> 00:08:42,043
I CAN'T GET THE SIGNAL BACK.
159
00:08:42,130 --> 00:08:44,782
THE SCRAMBLER'S PROGRAMMED
TO CHANGE ITS CODE AT RANDOM.
160
00:08:44,869 --> 00:08:47,782
WE WERE JUST LUCKY TO UNSCRAMBLE
THE SIGNAL IN THE FIRST PLACE.
161
00:08:47,869 --> 00:08:50,260
WE NEED A COMPATIBLE
DECODER BOX.
162
00:08:50,347 --> 00:08:51,086
[ DOOR OPENS ]
163
00:08:51,173 --> 00:08:53,695
LIKE THIS ONE?
164
00:08:53,782 --> 00:08:55,217
WE'D HAVE GOTTEN HERE SOONER,
165
00:08:55,304 --> 00:08:58,347
BUT THE CARGO PLANE WE BORROWED
WASN'T BUILT FOR SPEED.
166
00:08:58,434 --> 00:09:01,086
WISH WE COULD HAVE SMUGGLED
OUT SCI-FI AND LIFELINE.
167
00:09:01,173 --> 00:09:02,434
THEY GOT CAUGHT.
168
00:09:02,521 --> 00:09:05,043
WE KNOW, AS DIAL TONE
WILL SHOW YOU.
169
00:09:06,913 --> 00:09:08,782
[ TELEPHONE RINGS ]
170
00:09:08,869 --> 00:09:12,173
THANK YOU FOR CALLING
COBRATHON.
171
00:09:12,260 --> 00:09:15,652
MAY I TAKE YOUR PLEDGE, PLEASE?
172
00:09:15,739 --> 00:09:16,869
THIS IS DEGRADING.
173
00:09:16,956 --> 00:09:20,173
FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE
JUST JOINED US --
174
00:09:20,260 --> 00:09:22,826
[ AUDIENCE BOOS, HISSES ]
175
00:09:22,913 --> 00:09:24,173
THAT ONE'S CHEATIN'!
176
00:09:24,260 --> 00:09:25,565
MAKE HIM PLAY THE GAME!
177
00:09:25,652 --> 00:09:27,260
[ BOOING CONTINUES ]
178
00:09:27,347 --> 00:09:30,260
WHAT?!
GUARDS! GUARDS!
179
00:09:30,347 --> 00:09:32,043
HE IS RUINING EVERYTHING!
180
00:09:40,478 --> 00:09:41,391
GO TO STANDBY!
181
00:09:41,478 --> 00:09:43,217
GO TO STANDBY!
182
00:09:46,739 --> 00:09:48,652
"PLEASE STAND BY"?
183
00:09:48,739 --> 00:09:49,739
WHAT HAPPENED?
184
00:09:49,826 --> 00:09:51,000
WHERE'S SCI-FI AND LIFELINE?
185
00:09:51,086 --> 00:09:52,695
PINPOINT THAT TRANSMISSION!
186
00:09:52,782 --> 00:09:54,913
WELL,
ACCORDING TO THE SATELLITE,
187
00:09:55,000 --> 00:09:56,869
COBRA'S SIGNAL
ORIGINATES IN NEVADA.
188
00:09:56,956 --> 00:09:59,086
I -- I CAN'T GET MORE SPECIFIC
THAN THAT.
189
00:09:59,173 --> 00:10:01,347
OF COURSE!
190
00:10:01,434 --> 00:10:04,347
THE BARONESS SAID, "IN KEEPING
WITH OUR SURROUNDINGS."
191
00:10:04,434 --> 00:10:06,869
I'LL BET THOSE SNAKES
ARE IN RENO OR LAS VEGAS.
192
00:10:06,956 --> 00:10:09,956
CHECK OUT EVERY TV STATION
AND STUDIO --
193
00:10:10,043 --> 00:10:12,173
ANYPLACE THAT TRANSMISSION
COULD BE COMING FROM.
194
00:10:12,260 --> 00:10:15,000
FIND IT, AND BRING BACK
SCI-FI AND LIFELINE.
195
00:10:16,826 --> 00:10:18,521
STOP IT, FOOL!
196
00:10:18,608 --> 00:10:21,956
DID YOU REALLY THINK
YOU COULD ESCAPE?!
197
00:10:22,043 --> 00:10:23,043
[ CHUCKLES ]
198
00:10:23,130 --> 00:10:26,782
SEEMED LIKE A GOOD IDEA
AT THE TIME.
199
00:10:26,869 --> 00:10:30,434
LAUGH WHILE YOU CAN,
G.I. JOKERS!
200
00:10:30,521 --> 00:10:33,521
TAKE THEM BACK TO THEIR CAGES
AND THEN CLEAN UP THIS MESS!
201
00:10:35,260 --> 00:10:36,826
OH, PLEASE,
202
00:10:36,913 --> 00:10:40,173
FORGIVE THE INTERRUPTION,
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.
203
00:10:40,260 --> 00:10:43,347
EVERYTHING IS NOW
UNDER CONTROL. HOWEVER,
204
00:10:43,434 --> 00:10:48,086
WE SHALL DETERMINE THE MANNER
OF THE JOES' CANCELATIONS
205
00:10:48,173 --> 00:10:52,391
LATER IN THE PROGRAM,
ONCE WE REPAIR THE WHEELS.
206
00:10:52,478 --> 00:10:54,826
BUT RIGHT NOW,
DESTRO WILL EXPLAIN,
207
00:10:54,913 --> 00:10:56,652
FOR THOSE WHO JUST JOINED US,
208
00:10:56,739 --> 00:10:59,478
THE MAIN OBJECTIVE
OF THIS TELETHON!
209
00:10:59,565 --> 00:11:04,130
UH, UH, THANK YOU,
LADIES AND GERMS!
210
00:11:04,217 --> 00:11:05,478
I, UH -- [ LAUGHS ]
211
00:11:05,565 --> 00:11:08,043
I JUST SLITHERED IN
FROM HEADQUARTERS, AND...
212
00:11:08,130 --> 00:11:09,521
[ CHUCKLES ]
213
00:11:09,608 --> 00:11:11,782
...BOY, DOES MY STOMACH HURT.
214
00:11:11,869 --> 00:11:13,826
[ LAUGHTER ]
215
00:11:13,913 --> 00:11:15,826
All:
VIVE LA COBRA!
216
00:11:15,913 --> 00:11:19,347
BUT, UH, SERIOUSLY, FOLKS,
A FUNNY THING HAPPENED TO ME
217
00:11:19,434 --> 00:11:21,739
ON THE WAY TO THE STUDIO.
218
00:11:21,826 --> 00:11:23,782
[ GROWLS ] NO!
219
00:11:23,869 --> 00:11:26,652
NO! I CANNOT CONTINUE
WITH THIS IDIOTIC DRIVEL!
220
00:11:26,739 --> 00:11:28,130
[ AUDIENCE SCREAMING ]
221
00:11:29,956 --> 00:11:31,434
AHH.
222
00:11:31,521 --> 00:11:33,130
THAT'S BETTER.
223
00:11:33,217 --> 00:11:34,000
[ CLEARS THROAT ]
224
00:11:34,086 --> 00:11:36,565
NOW, THEN, JOINING ME HERE
225
00:11:36,652 --> 00:11:39,347
IS THE MAN WHO DEVELOPED
THE COMPUTER VIRUS.
226
00:11:39,434 --> 00:11:40,826
COMPUTER VIRUS?
227
00:11:40,913 --> 00:11:43,043
DR. MINDBENDER!
228
00:11:43,130 --> 00:11:44,782
THANK YOU, DESTRO.
229
00:11:44,869 --> 00:11:46,000
AT THE EXACT MOMENT
230
00:11:46,086 --> 00:11:49,521
WHEN THIS TOTE BOARD
SHOWS $5 BILLION,
231
00:11:49,608 --> 00:11:53,434
COBRA'S HOST SYSTEM,
A MAINFRAME COMPUTER,
232
00:11:53,521 --> 00:11:56,869
PRESENTLY HIDDEN IN A REMOTE,
SECRET LOCATION,
233
00:11:56,956 --> 00:12:00,304
WILL AUTOMATICALLY
SEND A COMMAND, VIA MODEM,
234
00:12:00,391 --> 00:12:03,565
TO THE FBI's CENTRAL MAINFRAME.
235
00:12:03,652 --> 00:12:05,434
THAT COMMAND
WILL INSTRUCT
236
00:12:05,521 --> 00:12:10,652
THE FBI COMPUTER TO BEGIN
RUNNING THE VIRUS PROGRAM.
237
00:12:10,739 --> 00:12:14,652
THE RESULT --
CRITICAL OVERLOAD.
238
00:12:14,739 --> 00:12:18,130
WITHIN MINUTES
AFTER THE FBI SYSTEM OVERLOADS,
239
00:12:18,217 --> 00:12:20,260
THE COMPUTERS OF SCOTLAND YARD
240
00:12:20,347 --> 00:12:23,782
AND ALL OTHER INTERPOL AGENCIES
WILL EXPLODE!
241
00:12:29,217 --> 00:12:31,304
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
242
00:12:31,391 --> 00:12:35,739
THANKS TO YOUR GENEROUS
CONTRIBUTIONS...
243
00:12:35,826 --> 00:12:39,043
NOTHING -- I MEAN NOTHING --
CAN STOP A COMPUTER VIRUS
244
00:12:39,130 --> 00:12:40,347
ONCE IT GETS STARTED.
245
00:12:40,434 --> 00:12:43,782
WE CAN SEIZE CONTROL
OF THE WORLD'S GOVERNMENTS
246
00:12:43,869 --> 00:12:47,565
WHILE THEIR LAW-ENFORCEMENT
AGENCIES ARE INCAPACITATED.
247
00:12:47,652 --> 00:12:50,652
WE'VE GOT LESS THAN
A BILLION DOLLARS OF TIME
248
00:12:50,739 --> 00:12:52,130
TO FIND THAT STUDIO.
249
00:12:52,217 --> 00:12:53,869
AT THE RATE
THEY'RE RAKING IT IN,
250
00:12:53,956 --> 00:12:56,000
THAT'S ABOUT SIX HOURS AWAY.
251
00:12:59,086 --> 00:13:01,260
Woman:
HEY! G.I. JOE!
252
00:13:01,347 --> 00:13:05,260
GLADYS, IRENE, A REAL G.I. JOE!
253
00:13:05,347 --> 00:13:07,782
UH, MA'AM,
I'M ON A MISSION.
254
00:13:07,869 --> 00:13:10,260
BUT CAN WE JUST
GET YOUR AUTOGRAPH?
255
00:13:10,347 --> 00:13:12,782
LATER, SISTER.
HE'S GOT WORK TO DO.
256
00:13:12,869 --> 00:13:14,826
I'M SURPRISED AT YOU, DIAL TONE.
257
00:13:14,913 --> 00:13:16,826
GET A DATE ON YOUR OWN TIME.
258
00:13:16,913 --> 00:13:18,173
AW, FLINT...
259
00:13:18,260 --> 00:13:21,130
WELL, WHILE YOU GUYS WERE
ROMANCING THE LOCALS,
260
00:13:21,217 --> 00:13:23,913
I CHECKED THE CASINO'S STUDIO.
NOTHING.
261
00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:26,391
RELAX.
IT WON'T BE MUCH LONGER.
262
00:13:26,478 --> 00:13:30,217
BETTER NOT BE, 'CAUSE THERE
AREN'T MANY PLACES LEFT TO LOOK.
263
00:13:30,304 --> 00:13:33,869
JOES? HERE?
WHERE ARE THEY HEADED?
264
00:13:33,956 --> 00:13:36,826
THEY'RE ON THEIR WAY
TO THE COCONUT PALM --
265
00:13:36,913 --> 00:13:39,173
YOUR HOTEL, BARONESS.
266
00:13:39,260 --> 00:13:42,652
OH? WELL, YOU DREADNOKS
SAY YOU'RE TOUGH.
267
00:13:42,739 --> 00:13:45,652
THEN SHOW THOSE JOES
JUST HOW TOUGH.
268
00:13:45,739 --> 00:13:47,695
NO PROBLEM, BARONESS.
269
00:13:47,782 --> 00:13:52,695
WE GOT A FEW OLD DISPUTES
TO SETTLE WITH THEM.
270
00:13:52,782 --> 00:13:53,913
WHAT IF FLINT AND THE BOYS
271
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:55,869
CAN'T PUT A STOP
TO THIS TELETHON?
272
00:13:55,956 --> 00:13:58,869
THEN MAYBE WE'LL BE ABLE
TO FIND THEIR HOST COMPUTER
273
00:13:58,956 --> 00:14:00,782
AND DISABLE IT
BEFORE THE COBRATHON
274
00:14:00,869 --> 00:14:02,782
REACHES ITS PLEDGE GOAL.
HOW?
275
00:14:02,869 --> 00:14:05,565
THIS PRINTOUT BEACH HEAD
SWIPED IS THE SCRATCH WORK
276
00:14:05,652 --> 00:14:07,608
OF THE PROGRAMMERS
WHO DEVELOPED THE VIRUS.
277
00:14:07,695 --> 00:14:11,434
ITS LOG-ON PROGRAM MIGHT TELL US
WHERE THEIR COMPUTER IS HIDDEN
278
00:14:11,521 --> 00:14:13,043
IF I CAN CRACK THE CODE.
279
00:14:13,130 --> 00:14:16,391
WELL, FOR PETE'S SAKE,
MAINFRAME, GET CRACKING!
280
00:14:25,695 --> 00:14:27,521
HIT THE DIRT! LOOK OUT!
281
00:14:27,608 --> 00:14:28,304
Woman:
DUCK! RUN!
282
00:14:28,391 --> 00:14:30,347
LOOK OUT!
283
00:14:33,739 --> 00:14:37,000
I GUESS THIS MUST BE
THE PLACE!
284
00:14:51,521 --> 00:14:54,782
WHO ARE THESE GUYS?!
DREADNOKS!
285
00:14:54,869 --> 00:14:56,260
YEAH, KEEPIN' THEIR EYES PEELED
286
00:14:56,347 --> 00:14:59,217
FOR ANYTHING THAT
MIGHT DISTURB THE COBRATHON!
287
00:15:00,782 --> 00:15:02,565
ALL RIGHT!
288
00:15:05,695 --> 00:15:07,304
UNLESS I MISS MY GUESS,
289
00:15:07,391 --> 00:15:11,304
COBRATHON IS GOING ON
INSIDE THIS HOTEL.
290
00:15:11,391 --> 00:15:13,565
MOVE IT, MEN.
291
00:15:19,347 --> 00:15:21,478
[ SIREN WAILS ]
292
00:15:21,565 --> 00:15:23,608
ANOTHER BUDDING CRIMINAL
293
00:15:23,695 --> 00:15:26,260
CUT DOWN IN HIS PRIME
BY THE AUTHORITIES.
294
00:15:26,347 --> 00:15:28,260
WHAT COULD WE DO ABOUT IT,
ZARTAN?
295
00:15:28,347 --> 00:15:30,260
WE CAN DO A LOT,
THRASHER.
296
00:15:30,347 --> 00:15:32,217
YOUR DOLLARS CAN HELP
297
00:15:32,304 --> 00:15:34,782
STOP THIS SHAMELESS WASTE
OF FRESH YOUNG TALENT.
298
00:15:34,869 --> 00:15:37,695
YES, YOUR DOLLARS
CAN MAKE IT POSSIBLE
299
00:15:37,782 --> 00:15:41,043
FOR YOUNG MEN TO BE SENT
TO COBRA'S ELITE ACADEMY.
300
00:15:41,130 --> 00:15:44,347
NO TELLING HOW LONG WE'LL
HAVE THE ELEMENT OF SURPRISE.
301
00:15:44,434 --> 00:15:47,000
[ GRUNTING ]
302
00:15:59,652 --> 00:16:01,217
[ HORN HONKS ]
303
00:16:04,043 --> 00:16:07,478
HAWK TO MAINFRAME.
COME IN, MAINFRAME.
304
00:16:07,565 --> 00:16:08,739
GO AHEAD, HAWK.
305
00:16:08,826 --> 00:16:10,565
HAVE YOU FOUND OUT IF THE CODE
306
00:16:10,652 --> 00:16:12,913
REFERS TO ANY PARTICULAR
LOCATION?
307
00:16:13,000 --> 00:16:14,000
AFFIRMATIVE.
308
00:16:14,086 --> 00:16:15,739
IT MEANS "CLOUD CITY" --
309
00:16:15,826 --> 00:16:17,869
ANCIENT ANASAZI PUEBLOS
310
00:16:17,956 --> 00:16:19,956
THAT HAVE BEEN
ABANDONED FOR CENTURIES.
311
00:16:20,043 --> 00:16:23,260
WHY ELSE WOULD THERE BE
TELEPHONE LINES STRUNG TO THEM?
312
00:16:23,347 --> 00:16:26,173
UNLESS COBRA'S HOST COMPUTER
IS INSIDE OF ONE.
313
00:16:26,260 --> 00:16:28,826
YEAH, THOSE LINES MUST BE
FOR THE MODEM HOOKUP
314
00:16:28,913 --> 00:16:31,782
THAT INTERFACES
THEIR COMPUTER WITH THE FBI'S.
315
00:16:31,869 --> 00:16:33,913
UH-OH. HEADS UP, GUYS.
316
00:16:34,000 --> 00:16:36,130
NIGHT RAVENS AT 7 O'CLOCK HIGH.
317
00:17:13,130 --> 00:17:14,913
INCOMING! HUNT COVER!
318
00:17:21,304 --> 00:17:22,956
COME ON.
WE DON'T HAVE MUCH TIME.
319
00:17:25,565 --> 00:17:27,434
[ LASER FIRE ]
320
00:17:42,173 --> 00:17:43,260
AAH!
321
00:17:50,173 --> 00:17:52,391
FLINT -- GRAB!
322
00:17:54,043 --> 00:17:56,173
All:
Y-O-O-O, JOE!
323
00:17:57,913 --> 00:17:59,173
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
324
00:17:59,260 --> 00:18:02,347
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
I'M PLEASED TO ANNOUNCE
325
00:18:02,434 --> 00:18:03,956
THAT THE HIGHLIGHT OF OUR SHOW,
326
00:18:04,043 --> 00:18:06,782
AND THE FATE
OF THESE G.I. BLOKES
327
00:18:06,869 --> 00:18:09,347
HAS FINALLY BEEN DECIDED!
328
00:18:09,434 --> 00:18:14,826
SCI-FI'S LIFE IS GONNA BE STOLEN
BY A ONE-ARMED BANDIT.
329
00:18:19,695 --> 00:18:20,826
[ BELL RINGING ]
330
00:18:20,913 --> 00:18:23,260
WHEN SCI-FI HITS THE JACKPOT,
331
00:18:23,347 --> 00:18:28,608
HE REALLY LOSES,
AND EVENTUALLY, THE HOUSE WINS!
332
00:18:28,695 --> 00:18:30,347
[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
333
00:18:30,434 --> 00:18:36,304
AND NOW, A GAME OF CRAPS
WITH THE MASTER OF THE GAME --
334
00:18:36,391 --> 00:18:39,347
DR. MINDBENDER!
335
00:18:39,434 --> 00:18:42,652
AND I BROUGHT ALONG
MY OWN PAIR OF DICE.
336
00:18:48,086 --> 00:18:50,000
[ COBRAS HISSING ]
337
00:18:50,086 --> 00:18:51,347
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
338
00:18:53,260 --> 00:18:56,826
FLINT TO DUKE -- PROCEEDING
INSIDE THE HOTEL ON FOOT.
339
00:18:56,913 --> 00:18:58,869
ELEVATORS ARE TOO WELL-GUARDED.
340
00:18:58,956 --> 00:19:01,304
THEY'RE BROADCASTING
FROM THE HOTEL BALLROOM
341
00:19:01,391 --> 00:19:03,347
JUST BELOW OUR PRESENT LOCATION.
342
00:19:03,434 --> 00:19:04,695
WE READ YOU, FLINT.
343
00:19:04,782 --> 00:19:07,521
WE'VE SPOTTED A BATTLE ANDROID
TROOPER HERE,
344
00:19:07,608 --> 00:19:10,869
AND I GOT A MONTH'S PAY
THAT SAYS IT ISN'T A TOURIST.
345
00:19:12,217 --> 00:19:13,304
[ GRUNTS ]
346
00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:16,043
FIRE!
347
00:19:18,652 --> 00:19:20,391
[ ELECTRICITY CRACKLING ]
348
00:19:29,130 --> 00:19:30,260
Mainframe:
WHOA.
349
00:19:30,347 --> 00:19:33,086
IF I DIDN'T KNOW
WHAT THAT EQUIPMENT WAS FOR,
350
00:19:33,173 --> 00:19:35,739
I'D SAY THIS PLACE
WAS A HACKER'S PARADISE.
351
00:19:35,826 --> 00:19:37,304
NOW WHAT?
352
00:19:37,391 --> 00:19:40,130
I'M GONNA INTRODUCE
A LITTLE PROGRAM OF MY OWN
353
00:19:40,217 --> 00:19:42,695
INTO THE INFECTED SYSTEM,
YOU MIGHT SAY.
354
00:19:42,782 --> 00:19:45,956
IT'LL TURN THE VIRUS BACK HERE,
AND THE ONLY COMPUTER
355
00:19:46,043 --> 00:19:48,739
THAT WILL BE OVERLOADED
WILL BE THIS ONE.
356
00:19:48,826 --> 00:19:50,782
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
357
00:19:54,217 --> 00:19:55,478
[ COBRAS HISSING ]
358
00:19:55,565 --> 00:19:57,130
[ TELEPHONES RINGING ]
359
00:19:57,217 --> 00:19:58,086
[ LASER FIRE ]
360
00:19:58,173 --> 00:19:59,260
IT'S A RAID!
361
00:20:01,043 --> 00:20:02,478
Man:
GET OUT OF MY WAY!
362
00:20:02,565 --> 00:20:05,260
THAT'S RIGHT, COWARDS -- RUN!
363
00:20:08,739 --> 00:20:10,739
LET'S GET OUT OF HERE!
364
00:20:10,826 --> 00:20:12,652
[ GLASS SHATTERS ]
365
00:20:18,304 --> 00:20:21,521
BARONESS TO SERPENTOR --
RED ALERT!
366
00:20:21,608 --> 00:20:24,521
REPEAT -- RED ALERT!
367
00:20:24,608 --> 00:20:26,869
[ COBRAS HISSING ]
368
00:20:34,217 --> 00:20:37,173
THIS CO2 GAS
WILL PUT THOSE COBRAS ON ICE!
369
00:20:51,652 --> 00:20:55,217
[ BELL RINGS, ALARM BLARES ]
370
00:20:55,304 --> 00:20:58,043
DUKE, MAINFRAME,
WHAT'S HAPPENING?!
371
00:20:58,130 --> 00:21:00,043
WE'VE DONE WHAT WE CAN HERE,
FLINT.
372
00:21:00,130 --> 00:21:01,565
LET'S GET OUT OF HERE!
373
00:21:01,652 --> 00:21:03,695
WE'LL KNOW ANY SECOND NOW
IF IT WORKED!
374
00:21:08,043 --> 00:21:09,739
IT WORKED!
375
00:21:09,826 --> 00:21:11,130
[ BELL RINGS, ALARM BLARES ]
376
00:21:11,217 --> 00:21:13,913
[ SIGHS ] THE COBRA HONCHOS
GAVE US THE SLIP,
377
00:21:14,000 --> 00:21:17,217
BUT AT LEAST INTERPOL'S
COMPUTERS ARE SAFE.
378
00:21:17,304 --> 00:21:20,782
HEY, LOOK --
THE CAMERAS ARE STILL RUNNING.
379
00:21:20,869 --> 00:21:23,260
THINK MAYBE WE SHOULD GIVE
THE FOLKS AT HOME A SIGN-OFF
380
00:21:23,347 --> 00:21:25,695
SO THEY KNOW
THAT THE SHOW IS OVER?
381
00:21:25,782 --> 00:21:27,347
WHAT YOU GOT IN MIND,
DIAL TONE?
382
00:21:27,434 --> 00:21:28,565
HOW ABOUT THIS?
383
00:21:30,434 --> 00:21:32,347
I THINK THAT SAYS IT ALL,
DIAL TONE.
384
00:21:32,434 --> 00:21:34,304
I THINK THAT SAYS IT ALL.
27436
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