Original subtitles

YO-O-O, JOE!

♪ HE'LL FIGHT FOR FREEDOM WHEREVER THERE'S TROUBLE ♪

♪ G.I. JOE IS THERE

♪ G.I. JOE, A REAL AMERICAN HERO ♪

♪ G.I. JOE IS THERE

♪ IT'S G.I. JOE AGAINST COBRA THE ENEMY ♪

♪ FIGHTING TO SAVE THE DAY

♪ HE NEVER GIVES UP, HE'S ALWAYS THERE ♪

♪ FIGHTING FOR FREEDOM OVER LAND AND AIR ♪

♪ G.I. JOE, A REAL AMERICAN HERO ♪

♪ G.I. JOE IS THERE

G.I. JOE IS THE CODE NAME

FOR AMERICA'S DARING, HIGHLY TRAINED SPECIAL-MISSION FORCE.

ITS PURPOSE -- TO DEFEND HUMAN FREEDOM AGAINST COBRA,

A RUTHLESS TERRORIST ORGANIZATION

DETERMINED TO RULE THE WORLD.

♪ HE NEVER GIVES UP

♪ HE'LL STAY TILL THE FIGHT'S WON ♪

♪ G.I. JOE WILL DARE

♪ G.I. JOE, A REAL AMERICAN HERO ♪

♪ G.I. JOE

[ SQUAWKS ]

POLLY BORED TO TEARS!

[ SQUAWKS ]

SPEAK FOR YOURSELF, POLLY.

I'M ENJOYING THE RELAXATION.

I'M WITH THE PARROT. I COULD STAND

A LITTLE COBRA HEAD-KNOCKING.

WHY DON'T I DIVE TO FIND THAT MISSING SPACE PROBE

INSTEAD OF THOSE ROBOT SUBS?

NEGATORY ON THAT, WET SUIT.

SEALS MAY BE TOUGH, BUT THEY CAN'T HANDLE ANTIMATTER,

AND THIS MUCH COULD POWER CALIFORNIA FOR A MONTH.

OR, IN THE WRONG HANDS, LEAVE IT A BARREN WASTELAND.

[ COBRA COMMANDER LAUGHS EVILLY ]

"WRONG HANDS," HE SAYS.

[ LAUGHS ]

COBRA SUBS ANGER, REVENGE, AND DAGGER, ATTACK!

Shipwreck: COBRA'S SUBMARINES!

TELL ME SOMETHING I DON'T KNOW!

HOW'D THEY SPOT US?

THIS MISSION IS TOP-SECRET!

NOT ANYMORE, BIG GUY.

NOW WE'RE TALKING ACTION!

YAHOO!

KEEP FIRING!

ANNIHILATE THEM!

THE BEST WE CAN DO IS SLOW THEM DOWN.

I'LL REPROGRAM THE REMOTE SUBS.

All: [ SCREAMING ]

THOSE ROBOT SUBS ARE EVERYWHERE!

[ LAUGHING ]

AVAST, YE SCURVY SWABS!

[ LAUGHS ]

WE DID IT!

HOLD ON TO YOUR HAT, SHIPWRECK -- THEY'LL BE BACK.

TORPEDO, FIX THE RADIO AND CALL DUKE FOR HELP.

WE MUST GAIN ACCESS TO THE JOES' NEW COMPUTER CENTER

AND PLACE THEIR ROBOT SUBMARINES UNDER COBRA CONTROL.

ONLY I CAN GAIN THAT ACCESS FOR YOU.

DON'T SPEAK SO QUICKLY, BROTHER ZARTAN.

THE JOES HAVE A FILE ON YOU A MILE LONG.

I CAN SNEAK IN AND OUT BEFORE THEY SUSPECT A THING.

I DON'T CARE WHICH OF YOU DOES THE TASK!

JUST GET CONTROL OF THOSE SUBS!

NOW, JUST TAKE IT EASY.

WE'RE WALKING THIS GUARD POST, NOT RUNNING IT.

[ OWL HOOTING ]

I CAN'T WAIT TO GET BACK TO ANTARCTICA.

NICE, FRESH SNOW.

PENGUINS, GLACIERS, SUB-ZERO WEATHER.

HEY!

WHAT THE BLOODY BLUE BLAZES ARE YOU SHOOTING AT?

[ ENGINE ROARS ]

I AIN'T NEVER SEEN ANYBODY MOVE THAT FAST!

THAT'S 'CAUSE YOU NEVER SAW ME SHOOTING AT THEM.

WELL, ZANDAR, YOU FAILED SO QUICKLY?

[ BREATHING HEAVILY ]

ONLY -- ONLY TEMPORARILY.

I'LL TRY AGAIN TOMORROW.

HEY, HOW ABOUT GIVING ME A SHOT AT THEM JOES?

THEY WON'T KNOW WHAT HIT THEM.

YOU WOULDN'T STAND A CHANCE.

YOU DIDN'T DO SO HOT YOURSELF.

WHY, WITH THE RIGHT FORGED PAPERS,

I'LL BE IN AND OUT BEFORE THEY KNOW

I CHANGED THE SUBMARINE COMPUTER CODES.

[ HEELS CLICKING ]

SERGEANT CAROL WHEEDLER,

COMPUTER SPECIALIST, REPORTING FOR DUTY.

MY ORDERS.

CLEARED FOR SECRET ACCESS ONLY.

OKAY, WELCOME ABOARD, SOLDIER.

CRIPES! BLEW A CIRCUIT!

UNGH!

JUST WHAT I NEED -- MORE TROUBLE.

[ HEELS CLICKING ]

[ CLEARS THROAT ]

EXCUSE ME. I HEAR YOU.

SIT DOWN AND SHUT UP.

I'LL BE WITH YOU WHEN I'M GOOD AND READY.

OH. HI.

THE HANDLE'S MAINFRAME, AND YOU'RE...

SERGEANT CAROL WHEEDLER.

I'M ASSIGNED TO AID IN THE INSTALLATION

OF SECRET COMPUTER EQUIPMENT.

[ LAUGHS ]

HANG LOOSE ON THE MILITARY RIGMAROLE.

YOU'RE WORKING WITH ME NOW.

LET'S GO SOMEWHERE AND TALK

SO I CAN FILL YOU IN ON THE BIG PICTURE.

I THINK I'VE GOT THE BIG PICTURE.

AND IF IT INCLUDES MAKING A PASS AT ME,

I'LL HAVE YOU UP ON HARASSMENT CHARGES

FASTER THAN YOU CAN SPIT.

SHEESH, YOU SOUND LIKE MY EX-WIFE.

Shipwreck: HANG ON, WET SUIT.

I THINK THERE'S SOMETHING UP AHEAD.

THAT'S THE SPACE PROBE, ALL RIGHT.

WE FOUND IT!

HEY, ALL RIGHT, WET SUIT! GOOD EYES!

YOU DID IT!

NOW TO BRING IT UP.

COME ON. COME ON!

AH, SWELL! WHEN YOU REPROGRAMMED

THE ROBOT SUBS TO ATTACK COBRA,

YOU MUST HAVE ERASED THE RECOVERY PROGRAM.

THEY'RE STUCK DOWN THERE.

CONTACT DUKE AND TELL HIM

WE NEED COMPUTER HELP, FAST!

ZARTAN, DO YOU RECEIVE?

WHAT'S THE HOLDUP?

MAINFRAME -- HE WON'T GIVE ME ANY BREATHING ROOM.

THEN STOP HIS BREATHING.

WILCO AND OUT.

NOW, THE S-78 BOARD CONNECTS TO THE COMMON GROUND.

ACCORDING TO THE SCHEMATIC, NOW,

WE PATCH THE R.O.N. LEADS INTO THE 232.

HEY, WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?!

CAROL! [ GRUNTS ]

YOU SAVED ME.

NOBODY EVER RISKED HIS LIFE FOR ME BEFORE.

COULDN'T LET YOU GET SQUISHED THE FIRST DAY ON THE JOB.

BEACH HEAD WOULD HAVE MY HIDE.

IN A WAY, I'M GLAD IT HAPPENED.

IT GIVES ME A CHANCE

TO APOLOGIZE FOR MY BEHAVIOR EARLIER.

WELL, MAYBE I WAS HASTY.

NO, YOU WEREN'T.

I WANTED TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.

BUT YOU'RE TOO DECENT A LADY TO TREAT LIKE THAT.

WELL, THAT'S THE NICEST THING ANYONE'S EVER SAID TO ME.

HOW ABOUT DINNER -- NO STRINGS, NO FUNNY BUSINESS --

JUST TO GET TO KNOW EACH OTHER BETTER?

WELL...

OKAY.

IS THE ANTIMATTER SPACE PROBE IN COBRA'S POSSESSION?

UH, NOT EXACTLY.

THEN GET IT... AT ONCE!

"AT ONCE," "AT ONCE."

EVERYTHING WITH HIM IS "AT ONCE."

ZARTAN, HAVE YOU GAINED CONTROL OF THE ROBOT SUBS?

NO.

I MUST HAVE CONTROL

OF THE JOES' SUBS AT ONCE!

BUT, OF COURSE, COBRA COMMANDER.

WE ALWAYS DO THE IMPOSSIBLE AT ONCE.

HEY, MAINFRAME, WHO'S THE FOX?

THE FOX'S NAME IS SERGEANT CAROL WHEEDLER,

AND SHE HAS VERY SHARP TEETH.

SOME PEOPLE JUST CAN'T TAKE A COMPLIMENT.

I CALL.

INSIDE STRAIGHT. HUH?!

[ CHUCKLES ] FIRST TIME I'VE EVER SEEN LEATHERNECK

AT A LOSS FOR WORDS.

YOU'RE ALL RIGHT, CAROL. YOU HANDLED THAT REAL WELL.

GOOD EVENING, SIR. MA'AM.

WE WAS EXPECTING SOME FISH TONIGHT,

BUT IT LOOKS LIKE THE BOAT'S A LITTLE LATE.

AND SPEAKING OF LATE,

AIN'T YOU GOT BETTER THINGS TO DO

THAN CAROUSING PAST YOUR BEDTIME, LITTLE DARLING?

YOU'RE WAY OUT OF LINE, BUSTER.

SHUT UP!

YOU DIRTBAG, YOU BUSTED MY FLUSH!

HEY, IT'S -- IT'S ZARTAN!

YOU PLANNING ON GOING SOMEWHERE?

[ CRACKING ]

DREADNOKS!

COME ON, SISTER.

HEY, WE MAKE QUITE A TEAM!

[ WHISTLES ]

ALL RIGHT, DREADNOKS!

BLOW THIS JOINT!

THE ROOF!

SHE'S GONNA COLLAPSE!

LET'S HOPE OUR LITTLE VISIT ENCOURAGES ZARANA

TO SPEED UP HER MISSION.

[ CRYING ] RUINED!

EVERYTHING RUINED!

[ SOBBING ]

NOW I'M REALLY MAD.

ZARTAN JUST WRECKED MY FAVORITE EATING SPOT.

WHAT'S THE PROBLEM, SHIPWRECK?

IT AIN'T A PROBLEM YET, DEEP SIX.

EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE, I GET A BLIP

JUST OUT OF SONAR RANGE.

MIGHT BE A WHALE, OR MIGHT BE A COBRA SUB.

I'LL RADIO DUKE AND FIND OUT WHEN OUR SUBS WILL BE READY.

SO, AFTER I GOT BACK FROM 'NAM, I KNOCKED AROUND A BIT

BEFORE ENDING UP IN SILICON VALLEY.

BLAST IT, MAINFRAME, WHERE'VE YOU BEEN?!

JUST OFF POST.

COBRA'S SNOOPING AROUND THE SPACE PROBE AGAIN.

GET THOSE ROBOT SUBS REPROGRAMMED!

WELL, CAN'T IT WAIT?

NO, RIGHT NOW!

I WANT THAT SPACE PROBE ON THE SURFACE

WHEN THE CARRIER GETS THERE IN THE MORNING.

COME ON, CAROL.

HOLD IT, MAINFRAME. YOU HAVE TOP-SECRET CLEARANCE,

BUT SHE ONLY HAS SECRET.

BACK OFF, BEACH HEAD.

SHE'S WITH ME!

MAINFRAME, PLEASE.

REGULATIONS STATE --

HANG REGULATIONS!

I GOT TO GET THOSE SUBS REPROGRAMMED.

EITHER LET ME IN OR TELL DUKE WHY NOT.

BLAST DUKE AND HIS RULE-BENDING.

ALL RIGHT, GO ON.

IMPRESSIVE.

THANKS, CAROL. BUILT IT MYSELF.

ALL WE HAVE HERE IS A MINOR GLITCH.

PUT A NEW BOARD IN, OUR PROBLEMS ARE SOLVED.

HMM, JUST A LOOSE BOLT ON THE CHASSIS HERE --

AH, JUST WHAT I NEEDED.

THERE WE GO.

YEAH, THAT SHOULD DO IT.

ONE SMALL SCREW'S LOOSE.

THANKS.

THERE, THAT SHOULD PUT THE SUBS

BACK IN SYNC WITH THE REMOTE CONTROLLERS.

DEEP SIX AND THE OTHERS CAN RAISE THE SPACE PROBE NOW.

HELLO, THERE.

I WAS TOLD BEING ON THE JOE TEAM WAS EXCITING,

BUT I HAD NO IDEA HOW EXCITING.

PLEASE...THE LIGHTS.

[ SCREAMS ]

[ SIGHS ]

SORRY, MAINFRAME,

BUT DUTY COMES FIRST... UNFORTUNATELY.

[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]

ZARANA'S CUT THE POWER.

THAT'S OUR SIGNAL!

[ ENGINES ROAR ]

[ ALARM BLARING ]

ARE THE SUBS REPROGRAMMED?

OF COURSE. LET'S GO!

EXCELLENT.

UNGH. C-CAROL!

SAY BYE-BYE TO YOUR BOYFRIEND.

AFTER THE EXPLOSION,

HE'LL BE NOTHING BUT A FOND MEMORY!

[ ALARM BLARING ]

[ GUNFIRE ]

HALT! HALT!

YOU DID WELL, ZARANA -- OR SHOULD I CALL YOU "DELILAH"?

[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]

AAH!

ZARTAN!

[ BLARING CONTINUES ]

[ DOORS SLAM ]

NO!

CAROL!

[ SIGHS ]

THE NAME'S ZARANA, NOT CAROL.

WAIT A MINUTE.

YOU ZAPPED ME!

I HAD A JOB TO DO, BUT I CAME BACK FOR YOU.

NOW WE'RE EVEN.

MAINFRAME, WHAT WAS THAT EXPLOSION?

SABOTEUR.

SHE GOT AWAY, THROUGH THAT HOLE.

YO-O-O, JOE!

THANKS, AGAIN.

LEAVE BEFORE I COMPLETELY REGAIN MY SENSES.

[ SONAR PINGING ]

IS MAINFRAME'S PROGRAM WORKING, WET SUIT?

BRING 'EM UP! BRING 'EM UP!

[ SQUAWKS ]

WE'RE GONNA FIND OUT.

All: HEY, HEY!

ALL RIGHT, WE'LL BE HOME BY TOMORROW.

Wet Suit: YEP, THE HARD PART'S OVER.

SMOOTH SAILING FROM HERE ON IN.

Serpentor: THEY MUST NEVER GET THAT SPACE PROBE

BACK TO THEIR HEADQUARTERS.

THE MINUTE SPECK OF ANTIMATTER RECOVERED FROM DEEP SPACE

IS ENOUGH TO TIP THE SCALES OF CONFLICT IN THEIR FAVOR.

ZARANA HAS PLACED THE ROBOT SUBS IN OUR CONTROL.

IF COBRA CAN'T HAVE THE ANTIMATTER...

NO ONE WILL.

WHAT'S HAPPENING?!

WHAT WAS THAT?!

OUR SUBS.

MAINFRAME MUST HAVE FOULED UP THEIR PROGRAMMING.

CLIMB ON!

THEY'LL HOIST US ABOARD!

SHIFT ATTACK TO THE CARRIER!

TAKE A DEEP BREATH, MAN -- DEEP BREATH.

MAINFRAME, ADMIRAL LEDGER

REPORTS THE ROBOT SUBS ARE ATTACKING THE CARRIER.

ATTACKING?

GIVE THE MAN A BREAK, DUKE.

HE'S SUFFERING FROM NEUROLOGICAL SHOCK.

NO, I GOT TO THINK.

BLAST. I SHOULD'VE GUESSED.

ZARANA REPROGRAMMED THE SUBS.

COBRA CONTROLS THEM NOW.

WE CAN'T DEPRESS OUR ANTIAIRCRAFT WEAPONS

ENOUGH TO FIRE AT THE SUBS.

WHY NOT SCRAMBLE THOSE CONQUESTS?

UNLEASH THE FIREBATS!

WE'VE BEEN HIT!

SILENCE THEIR GUNS!

Duke: TAKE COVER!

AAH! POLLY WANTS A NEW LINE OF WORK!

Duke: DON'T LET THEM GET THAT PROBE!

HOLD YOUR FIRE!

HIT THE PROBE, AND THE ANTIMATTER

WILL BLOW US ALL TO KINGDOM COME!

THEY'VE GOT THE ANTIMATTER!

THAT'S NOT OUR ONLY PROBLEM.

THE ROBOT SUBS ARE CHOMPING THROUGH THE HULL!

Man: THE JOES' ANTIAIRCRAFT FIRE DAMAGED OUR LIFT POWER.

WE'RE GOING TO CRASH!

Cobra Commander: NOT IF WE USE THE ANTIMATTER TO SUPPLY ENERGY.

IF COBRA THINKS THAT'S ALL THE FIREPOWER WE GOT...

[ CHUCKLES ] THEY'RE IN FOR ONE HECK OF A SHOCK.

SHOOT THEM DOWN!

IT'S NOT WORKING. RUN!

TAKE THAT, YOU BILGE RATS!

ABANDON SHIP! ABANDON SHIP!

SWIM FOR THE BATTLE PLATFORM!

CRIPES. THERE GOES THE ANTIMATTER.

ALL UNITS, RETURN TO BASE!

NOW, THAT'S WHAT YOU CALL YOUR REAL BIG-BUDGET,

SPECTACULAR FINISH.

SO, WE LOST.

NO, IT WAS A DRAW.

JOE AND COBRA BOTH LOST A CARRIER,

AND NEITHER OF US GOT THE ANTIMATTER.

AND IT'S ALL MY FAULT.

DON'T BLAME YOURSELF.

ZARANA FOOLED BEACH HEAD, MYSELF, EVERYBODY.

YEAH, TELL ME ABOUT IT.

HEY, ZARANA, I'VE BEEN THINKING --

MAYBE YOU OUGHT TO QUIT THE DREADNOKS,

GO MARRY THAT WIMP, GET A HOUSE IN THE SUBURBS, HAVE KIDS.

[ LAUGHTER ]

All: AAH!