All language subtitles for Magnum.Dopus.The.Maki-RARBG

♪♪

♪♪

Man: And later on,
when this guy comes up here,

she has a gun
that does not fire.

We're not using weapons.

It doesn't have any bullets.

Uh... here we go and,

when I tell you, when I cue you,

I want everyone
to clap big, guys.

Here we go. And...

♪♪

Hey!

♪♪

So, "Jay and Silent Bob Reboot"

came about after years
of Jason Mewes going like,

"We should do another Jay
and Silent Bob movie,"

and I was like,
"You're out of your mind."

Like, "I can't believe
we got away with that once."

You know, I had had issues
with trust about Jason

because he'd fallen down
the drug hole so many times,

so that was a reason why,
whenever he'd be like,

"Let's do another Jay
and Silent Bob,"

I was like,
"You know, that's cool,"

'cause inside, I was like...
I...

It was hard to make the last one

'cause he was still kind of

using and stuff like that

before we started
shooting the movie

and, first, you had
to get him off drugs

and then go make the flick

and constantly watch him
and worry that he was...

What was he getting up to
when he wasn't on set?

But after hanging out with him

while we were making the podcast
for as long as we have

and traveling the world
and shit like that,

I got to know him
in a different way

and trust him implicitly,
like with my life.

And so we had tried to make
"Clerks III"

and that kind of didn't happen,

and then, we tried to make
"Mallrats 2,"

and that didn't happen.

"Clerks," I don't own.

We sold it many years ago
to Miramax.

"Mallrats," I don't own.
Universal owns it.

So I can't do anything
with those,

unless they say I can.

It was very frustrating.

Couldn't play with my own toys.

Then, I remembered, you know,
we own "Jay and Silent Bob."

You don't have to ask anybody
for permission to do that.

If you wanna make
a "Jay and Silent Bob" movie,

you can go right now
and you can do it.

He had been clean for so long
and like, you know,

it just sounded fun like
as I rolled it over in my head.

I was like, "What if we did like

'Jay and Silent Bob Reboot'?"

And we would've,

but then I had a heart attack.

Hey, man. It's me.
And I'm fine, kinda.

I had a heart attack...
A massive heart attack...

And very nearly died
the other night, Sunday night.

I was doing two shows,
which we were shooting

for a comedy special
and, after the first show,

which was great, two hours,
and I was like, "Oh, shit.

Like we got one more show.
This is gonna be great."

I started feeling nauseous.

I was the first one
he called when he came

out of the cath lab

and it was 3:00 in the morning.

The phone rang and I figured,
"Well, okay.

Kevin would call at that hour,"
or my daughter.

And
I picked it up

and I said, "Hey, Kev.
What are you doing at this hour?

I'm just cleaning the house."

I was doing something, anyhow.

He said, "Ma,
I knew you'd be up.

I gotta tell you something."

He said, "We're twins."

I said, "No. You're my son.

I'm your mother." And he said,

"No. We're twins.

I just had an LAD
opening up with a stent.

He says, "I was 99% blocked,
like you were."

I go, "What? Wait a minute.
Is this a joke at 3:00

in the morning, Kevin?
I don't find this one funny."

Growing up, I lost a lot
of important people to me,

but I was younger,
but, thank goodness,

knock on wood,
it honestly has been

many, many, many, many years
since I've lost someone

and had to deal with loss.

I don't know.
I like freaked out.

I remember freaking out
on the way there

and then I tried to calm down
and be supportive.

And he goes, "Mom, I swear."

He said, "I just got off

the cath lab, you know, gurney

and the doctor was
very successful, thank God."

Man, when I heard about it,
it was just unbelievable.

I mean, I just kept thinking
like, "This just can't be true.

This can't have happened."

And there was that sense
of like, "Holy shit.

One of my friends almost died?"

Like you don't really
think about that.

And then you're like,
"Oh, yeah. That's right.

We're old."

And he always tells me

that there was a moment

where he didn't know
if he was gonna make it

and, in that moment,
he felt very peaceful,

like he had done most
everything that he wanted

and his life was so
wonderful and beautiful,

he wouldn't really want it
any other way,

but he's been wanting to make
this film for so long that,

if there was one thing
that he could go back and do,

it would be this film.

Because, you know,
when you almost die and shit,

you're like, "No more like,
'We'll get to it.'"

It's like, "We gotta go,
now, because time is...

You don't know when your time's
fucking up and shit."

It was clearly such a vulnerable
moment in our family.

He could have told me
that he wanted to

do a sequel to "Tusk" and I
would've said yes.

It kind of, in many ways, like
was the impetus to live around.

I'm not saying like I lived

to make
"Jay and Silent Bob Reboot,"

but, when we went back
into the movie,

like post-heart attack,

the movie took
a different shape.

Once he had recovered,

which, he recovered

farmore quickly than I did,

I guess he really wanted
to take a look at his life.

It kept changing.
I kept rewriting.

I kept adding things
and leaning into the feels.

A year to the day
of Kevin's heart attack,

February 25th, was the day
that principal shooting started

and, to the day, one year later,
we were shooting it.

♪♪

Here we are, man! Day 1!

Oh, my Lord! It took so long
to get here, man,

including
a near-death experience,

but we're here to shoot day 1.

Today, we're gonna spend
the day at the mall.

We start
"Jay and Silent Bob Reboot"

by heading back to "Mallrats"
country with Jason Lee.

Brodie has now graduated.

Secret Stash used to be
in Red Bank.

He's now moved it into the mall,

which he always loved
and whatnot,

even though the mall
is slowly dying.

So there's a little
bit of story there

and then we set up
our main story

for what happens
in "Jay and Silent Bob Reboot,"

man, so I can't wait!

This is me
taking all my old toys

out of the attic
and playing with 'em.

Jason Lee, one of my favorite
toys to play with.

I cannot wait
to see what happens.

♪♪

The mall books...
Man: Mention to the

- including...
- art department...

Mention to Nathan.

The whole history.

'Cause it's like
I'll look at the movie,

"That's my life, bro."

I should've...

Like I loved...

I saw this and I was like,
"Have it!"

♪♪

Just a quick thank you
from the bottom of my heart

and the top of my head
and everywhere else.

It's gonna be 21 days
of shooting,

over the course of which,
hopefully,

I will learn everybody's
name and stuff.

Never fail to come up to me
if you have a question.

It's some dopey shit that I sat
in a room two years ago

and was like, "Wouldn't
that be fucking funny?"

And here we are.

Let's hope it is fucking funny.

I love you all.

Let's rehearse.

I lovethe smell of commerce

in the morning.
- Yeah!

Jason Lee hadn't acted
in a red-hot minute...

Four years, he said...
When he came to play,

but, you know, it was like
riding a bike or, rather,

for Jason Lee,
like riding a skateboard.

He got right back on and was
crushing it and stuff like that.

This is... It's been a while.

I haven't been on a set
in a while

'cause I've been on a little
bit of a hiatus

and so to jump
right back into it

with all the Kevin Smith
dialogue,

it felt like shooting
"Mallrats" all over again

because I was new at that time.

I was a newcomer.
So there's a little bit

of sort of dialogue
choreography, in a way.

But it ultimately fits
his world and his characters

and the rhythm of it,
so you go with it

and, when it works...

When you get it right
and it works,

it makes sense
why it's that way.

This is my only day,
so fuck you guys!

Hear that.

Ocho for the win.

Ocho for the win.
- I'm number 8

on the call sheet.
I demand respect.

Honestly, I'm excited
to be back with Kevin.

It's been a long time.

And I hadn't worked with Jay
since before I can remember.

I mean, it's been
a long, long time.

I'm just happy he's
alive, certainly,

and survived that ordeal

and that he's back
on a set in a mall

and I was a part of it.

Kind of a cool
full-circle thing,

25 years later,
after "Mallrats" was made.

Being in the comic book store
with Jason Lee again

was fantastic.

Listening to his inflections
was pitch-perfect.

It was like 1995 and 2001
and 1997 all over again.

I worked with Jason Lee a lot.

Can I just please
give it up for the man

without whose gracious
patience and talent

we wouldn't have gotten
through this day?!

Jason Lee, everybody!

♪♪

Hey, man. So this is day 2.

Clearly, I'm in costume.

I don't dress like this
all the time.

I used to. But, now,
I only put on the coat

and the fake long hair
when we're on a movie set

and, clearly,
we're on a movie set.

Look at this!
Look at all the money!

There's a crane,
for heaven's sakes!

Moviemaking is exactly like
when you're a kid,

and you make pretend, just
with lotsmore money for toys.

God bless you. And disease.

Riddledwith disease as well.

Nothing compares to this, man,

the making pretend
while growing up and whatnot.

Emily, come on in.

Do what you need to do.

I didn't know
you were on camera.

Emily does my... Say hello.

- Hi.
- She does my hair and makeup.

She... What is it, grooming? Grooming.

She's the one who put this
fake hair on me.

This hair is attached
to the hat,

so you can like
take it off and put it on.

I don't have to deal
with extensions

or anything like that.

So low-tech.

We figured this out
on "Clerks II"

'cause Jeff Anderson
wanted a little ducktail.

He didn't want long hair,
so we just sewed the hair

into the back of his hat,
so every time he'd put it on,

boom, he had
somewhat longish hair.

So I was always dreaming like,
"If we ever did

Silent Bob again, I would do
that," and we did it.

This is the show
where dreams come true

and my dreams are to sew hair
into the back of a baseball cap.

In any event, welcome to day 2.

♪♪

- Oh, my god.
- Wait, can I go back?

I missed my butt.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh, please.
You see it every day.

I know. For some of us,
it's a rare treat.

♪♪

So, what we got going on
in this scene is

Jay finds out that his kid,
in the movie,

who is my kid, in real life,
is getting into a van

with what he thinks is
an unsavory character,

so he goes over to the van,
pulls the dude out,

and beats the shit out of him.

Thisis so close
to the real Jason Mewes,

who has his own daughter
who's, what, 31/2, almost 4?

- Yeah.
- This is the preview

of what's gonna happen
when shestarts dating.

Hopefully, she never dates,
but if she does,

yes, hopefully, without
the physical violence

because I don't wanna
go to jail.

But, hopefully my stare

with be enough to keep 'em away.

Let me see that stare.
Give the camera the stare.

So there's some 15-year-old punk
showed up at your front door,

and he's like, "Eh!
What about them doughnuts?"

What do you say?
- The guy behind the camera,

for example...

- Look at 'im.
- He seems like a creepy,

unsavory guy.
- Give 'im the look.

Give 'im the look.

That ain't gonna do it.

That guy's going for your
daughter, regardless.

You gotta...
You might need a gun.

You here to see my daughter?

♪♪

So, my character, her name
is Millennium Faulken

and she is the daughter
of Justice and Jay.

She's just super tough
and kind of refuses

to take any shit,
which I really dig.

It was interesting for me
because, you know,

just knowing her,
growing up, personally

and just seeing her
as an actress, that was amazing.

Her playing my daughter
and the relationship

we had as actors and characters,
it was surreal,

I guess I could say is the word.

Again, even though she didn't
grow up around Jay,

I feel like,
just by virtue of genetics,

like how I am somehow
exactly like my dad sometimes,

I think she does
definitely have moments

where Jay shines
out of her.

♪♪

Whole preproduction of two years
leading up to making the movie,

it was like,
"We have to shoot in Jersey,

at least for the
Quick Stop sequence."

I'm not saying we gotta shoot
the whole movie there,

but like Quick Stop
is Quick Stop.

You can't duplicate that shit
anywhere in the world.

Like people would know,
so, we gotta go back there.

The locations department showed
me a picture of this building

that Nate,
the production designer,

who did such a great job,
put a few Quick Stop signs on

and I was like, "Well, wow.

That does kinda look
like Quick Stop.

That's fucked up.
How close can we get?"

Woman: Thank you.

♪♪

Good morning.

Isn't that amazing?

This, what stands
behind us, represents

not only an engineering marvel,

but a set decorative marvel,
a production design marvel,

and standing beside me
is production designer Nate.

Say hi, Nate.
- Hey.

Now, Nate, for my money,
should win an Academy Award.

I forgot that we work
in the movie business

and anythingcan be replicated,
literally anything!

I mean, you coulda
greenscreened this motherfucker

and did it in post...

...but Nate went
out with Ashley,

our production designer.

They found a building
that was soQuick Stop-like

that they were able
to do this, man,

and, now, they skinned
the fuck out of it

and created the block of stores,
man, and I fucking cried, Nate!

When I... They got footage.

I talked about... I looked out.
I just got so emotional.

I was like, "This is the crux

of everything
that I became in life."

I'm gonna cry again,
thinking about it.

Two people in the world
who you could never fool,

me and the other guy
whose whole life

is tied into this building,
Brian O'Halloran,

and Brian O'Halloran
pulled up and was like,

"It's a fucking clone."

Like, we were just going,
"This is uncanny!" Like...

And, again, we all work
in the movie business,

so there should be like
some sort of like,

"Yeah.
I mean, you can replicate.

They do it all the time,"
but this one,

it's like somebody
replicated my heart.

This guy, this guy took...

Here, in fucking Louisiana,

he replicated the most banal
real estate in New Jersey,

that is the most important
real estate to me.

♪♪

One of the interesting things
about a Kevin Smith set is

he is just a creative maestro

and I just like to feel
like the triangle

in the back of the orchestra,
that he points at

at that crucial moment and says,

"Nervous Cop."

"Ting-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g!"

And... action!

Oh, shit!

♪♪

Oh! I'm not even supposed
to be here today!

Alright. The reason why my name
is Captain Daniel Steele is

one of the executive
producers on the show

knew me back in the day

and she knew me as a guy
that loved Hootie & the Blowfish

and loved to read
Danielle Steel novels.

And it's because, deep down
in my heart...

I'm a very sensitive

police officer
that believes in love.

This is the Leonardo
Police Department!

You're under arrest

for suspicion
of drug trafficking!

Drop your plants, now!

So, here we are
in front of Quick Stop,

doing a sequence that I wrote,

not for "Jay
and Silent Bob Reboot,"

but originally for "Clerks III."

We were supposed to do this
at the opening for "Clerks III,"

so that means I wrote this...
Let me see.

If two years ago was
"Jay and Silent Bob Reboot,"

four or five years ago,
at this point.

So seeing it come
to life finally

is like a dream come true.
It was fucking crazy,

watching him run out
and do the tuck.

The whole movie is like
a greatest hits album,

so we pulled back every gag
that ever fucking worked.

Hello, young man.

Thank you, guys. We're wrapped.

I have to sit
and you have to tell me.

- We're wrapped. We're wrapped.
- We're wrapped, everybody!

Great job!

Now, hold on! Hold on!

While we're all here,
shouldn't we take

a group picture shot
in front of the Quick Stop?

- Yeah.
- Yeah!

- Group shot.
- Cast and crew picture

in front of the Quick Stop!

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

This is day 4, man,
and on day 4 and 5,

we're going to be on a stage,
a soundstage.

Now, when you think,
"soundstage," you're like,

"Hollywood soundstage."

But Louisiana, like Vancouver,

where I go do "Flash"
and "Supergirl" sometimes,

so much production happening
here, they don't have...

Like all the soundstages
are taken,

so they just convert
old warehouse spaces

into soundstages,

so today we're gonna be
on one of those soundstages,

shooting some greenscreen
stuff, movie magic.

Let's go check it out.

♪♪

Oh! Hey, there, boss.

All your different styles
of glasses you have.

'Cause Kevin used
to wear glasses

with just glass,
like no prescription.

No, no, no.

I would not wear them.
- Hey, John.

How do these look?

We're putting these in now.

I gotta say, though...

You look like you should
run a studio

in the '70s.

I don't know.

'Cause I think
I might need glasses.

♪♪

Man: I was like, "Whoa, whoa."

I jump back

Cut!

And as soon as you see the flame

come out, blow it out.

Blow in, blow out.
Blow in, blow out.

Now. Yeah, exactly.

That's it. That's it.

Yeah, you just don't
inhale it, ever.

Yeah. It's so weird.
- I'll need... Ugghh!

Kevin: Weird day.

The kid had to light a joint...

A "fake joint"...
Much to my chagrin,

in the scene and blow smoke,

but she never really smoked
before, she says,

and, based on what I saw,
I think that's the case.

So, oddly enough,

Jason had to teach her to smoke.

Took nearly 20 years, but,

he finally taught
my kid how to smoke.

I don't know how
to feel about that.

Not proud.

But it was when we turned
around on Treshelle,

that was when I was like,
"Oh, my God.

This scene is fucking magic."

She is just so the light.

She's so wonderful.

She turned and smiled
into that camera and stuff

and, you know, she's kind of the
girl Silent Bob in our picture,

so maybe that's why
I feel very affectionate

toward the character
and the performance

and the actress giving
the performance.

But that warmed my heart today.

I know we're making
a comedy and, you know,

we're supposed to be
making people laugh and shit,

but movie magic is movie magic
and, when she turned into her,

you know, close-up, looking back
from the front of the car,

that was truly movie magic, man.

Holy shit! That's weed!

That's right.

- Where'd you get it?
- From her.

Where'd sheget it?!

Sopi lives on a commune
in Oregon

where deaf people grow
the best weed in the West.

Deaf people know how
to grow weed?

Man:
What's it like
working with Jay?

I love that...

I don't know if I should say
the n-word... motherfucker.

Or fatherfucker.

We were laughing about that, so.

He is so dope.

He is so fun. Like he...

In the morning, he comes
into the makeup trailer

and he's like singing songs.
It's just...

He's like a big brother
that you're just like,

"You keep being you, Jay."

I think he's... I mean,
he's so incredibly talented.

One of the worst things
an actor can do can be like,

"Oh, the coverage is not me.
I'm gonna go."

Jay, however,
is constantly always like,

"Where do I need to be for you?

What can I give you?"
And then he's giving it 100%

every time, whether or not
he's on the camera,

and he makes it so fun.

I mean, really, there's no
end to the madness.

Literally every day,
he's doing something so funny,

I'm losing my mind.

Fucking writers.

- That motherfucker, man.
- It's no good.

If only he had spell-check. Neg!

- Man.
- That's what's going on?

We're taking Chickity China
the Chinese chicken

to go see
that Bluntman bullshit?

Oh! What?!

♪ What, what in the butt? ♪

♪ What, what in the... ♪Man: Kevin.

Oh.

Uh, that's it.
We have no more work left today.

We've shot everything
we could possibly shoot.

Have a fantastic
Mardi Gras weekend.

Get real fucked up. Whoo!

Come back to work on Monday
for one day.

We take Tuesday off,
get fucked up again.

Then come back to work
for a half week

of Wednesday to Friday, man.

I lovemy NOLA crew.

Thank you so much
from the bottom of my heart.

♪♪

Hey, hey, guys! Hey, guys!

Thank you! That's a wrap!

Good night!
- Whoo!

So, you know, Kevin,
one of his favorite parts

of making a movie is editing it

and he literally starts

as soon as he has footage,
while we're shooting.

And how I like to work is,

when I'm making
the fucking flick,

I cut together as much as I can

every night,

so that I can show people

what the movie looks like,

so they can be... You know.

I know what it looks like
in my head, but,

the job, as such, is you're
always trying

to explain to people,
"This is what I want.

This is what I look for."

It's easier to just be like,
"Here! Look what you did!

This is what... We did it!"

So, he started editing
in New Orleans

and would bring
the footage to tape,

as he does pretty much
on every movie.

Didn't sleep.

He was too excited.

It's always just
such a mystery to me.

He shoots for, what?
12 hours, 15 hours a day,

comes home,
and sits down and edits,

I think,
until his head hits the desk.

And he'll sleep
for maybe two hours

and then get up and shoot again.

It is inhuman.

Like I don't know
how he does it,

but that's just the way
that he operates.

And that's really beneficial

because people are
self-correcting animals, right?

So if you show someone
a scene, you know,

whether the actor or the fucking
gaffer or the costume designer

or the production designer
or fucking DP,

they're gonna look at that clip
in a different way than you are.

I'm looking at the overall,
the God seat, going like,

"This is the movie!
This totally works."

They're looking
at that sequence going like,

"Oh, man. I could've made
that light hotter.

Today, if I get another chance,
I'm gonna do...

Different scene,
but I'm gonna fucking...

I'm gonna correct that.
I'm gonna make that better."

That's great. You guys
are doing a great job...

- Aw.
- ...ladies and gentlemen.

I like the movie you're making
very much,

much better than the one
I had in my head and heart

when I was
about to start this flick.

You guys know what you're
doing, thankfully.

But, yeah, it's been great.

It was a great weekend,

but I didn't see
the light of day at all.

♪♪

♪♪

I wanna take a picture of us.

Totally should. Yeah.

- Oh, yeah.
- You know what? We're gonna take

a lotta pictures, about 24%.

So, today, we're in court.

They're doing the big courtroom
scene with Jay and Silent Bob.

Lots of cameos and whatnot,
actors, actresses,

coming in for the day
to be in the movie

and then fuck off forever
and stuff like that.

One of those is an actress
who is also a producer.

Tell 'em your name.
- Jordan.

I'm not an actress.
- Yes, you are, today.

Jordan is going to lead
Jay and Silent Bob into court,

but it's also meta enjoyable
for me and Jay and Silent Bob

because that's what Jordan
does all day in real life.

She's a cop
who escorts Jay and Silent Bob

everywhere they need to go.

I try to keep them on the
straight and narrow.

♪♪

And action.
- Docket number 38,

Hollywood Motion Picture
Company B!

Jay and Silent Bob.

Because he's
editing in his mind,

I mean, he's editing
as we're shooting,

so he knows the pieces he needs,

but he also encourages
improvisation

and keeps it very open.

So it's a very fertile
environment for comedy,

I think, because he's
very encouraging and playful

and, you know, he has what
my favorite directors have,

which is just that like
sense of play,

like a kid in the sandbox,
you know?

It's so loose and laid-back,

yet, you know,

he runs a tight ship.

I was a junior in high school.

We were all obsessed
with "Clerks."

I mean, you know, Kevin said,
"Come on out

and let's reboot this movie
and come do something."

It was like
I didn't even read it.

It was like... I was, "Yes!
Okay. Let's go."

One thing, he's like the most
positive like athletic coach.

He like gives you
pep talks before every setup.

It's really positive
and sweet in that way

and you also know he knows
exactlywhat he wants,

so you're just like fully trust
that, which is so nice.

Kevin: Hey, everybody!

Happy Mardi Gras, man.

Enjoy the day off!

You guys earned it.
Incredible...

Man: Get shit-faced!

- Whoo!
- Yeah!

♪♪

We're gonna take one picture
before you go.

My good man!

Time to kick back,
drink some beers,

and smoke some weed!
- Yeah!

Man: Kevin.

♪♪

You got that? Yeah. I'm ready.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

When we get inside,

we're gonna say hi to everybody
and take pics and stuff.

Sorry we started as quickly
as we did this morning,

but they're doing
a visual effect

to make it look like we've
got 1,000 people and stuff.

So far, it looks fantastic.

You are allso fucking
beautiful, man,

so creative and shit like that.

Thank you for coming down.

We'll be talking
throughout the entire day,

but it'll be easier
when we're inside,

so I'll see you guys there.

See you guys inside
in a couple minutes!

Woman: Thank you!

♪♪

♪♪

Alright, man.

So this is the big exterior
of Chronic-Con day.

Chronic-Con takes up
a good portion of our shoot.

In Chronic-Con, as you can see,
it's a sea of me.

Like, basically, our world

is based on the
"Bluntman and Chronic,"

which means you get to have
a sea of Jay and Silent Bobs,

a sea of Bluntman and Chronics,
anything played in that movie.

Now, they're not referencing

"Jay and Silent Bob"
Jay and Silent Bob.

They're referencing
Biggs and Van Der Beek.

See how meta and weird it gets?

So this whole Chronic-Con,
man, is like

Jay came into my trailer
this morning and was like,

"Everyone fucking
looks like us,"

and he was delighted by that.

Thank you guys, very, very much.

Can't thank you enough,
ladies and gentlemen, man!

Thank you for making the trip.

I know I'm gonna see some of you

in a few days as well.

Everyone got on camera.

Y'all look fucking good, man.

Like it means
the absolute world.

If you need anything
from me in the future,

I owe you one and shit.

Anything but money is yours.

But what we can do is,
if you guys are going in

for lunch,
I'll pop in there with Jay

and we'll say goodbye
to everybody, man.

Thanks for being here.
I'll see ya later.

♪♪

Please, no posting
of pictures...

If you wanna post
a picture of me and you,

that's totally fine,
but nothing that you saw today

- Not in costume.
- Or anything.

- What?
- Not in costume?

Yeah, I'm not even
in the costume.

- They're also in costume.
- I mean...

- Is that cool?
- I think it...

Honestly, I think it's okay.

Like everyone knew we were doing

Jay and Bob.
- Okay.

So, yeah, but try to like

keep spoilery shit
off the Internet.

Alright. So you have
your cellphones ready,

hand them to me,
I'm gonna bang it,

and then you're gonna go
that way.

So we'll keep moving this way.

I'll join you on the floor.
Here we go.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

This is reason enough
for me to go back.

Alright. I'll see you
out there, kids.

♪ Hey ♪ - ♪ Whoo... ♪

- ♪ We ride hard, hard ♪
- ♪... whee! ♪

You got a blunt?

Got weed, n-word?

We back at it again, n-word!

Holy shit, Silent Bob! Look!

It's Method and Red!

How do myself and Redman
play into this reboot

of "Silent Jay and Bob"?

You heard how I said it?

I said, "Silent Jay and Bob."

- "Silent Jay and Bob"?
- Yeah, "Silent Bob and Jay."

Well, okay. The way me
and Redman play
into it is

something happens
to Jay's character

and Bob's character,

where they're slipped something

and they slip into this haze,

so to speak,
into this dreamland...

Yeah, where we happen to be

at the moment.

You still rolling? Bitches!

Don't snooch the cooch!

No! No! No!

I did Juilliard, dammit!

No! No!

We will not be doing this scene

until I get my smoke.

I want my smoke!

So we... It was like, you know,

we went in there and did
what we had to do

and he was... appreciated it

and he loved it
and we was outta there.

It wasn't we had to shoot
eight or nine

different times.
He got what he wanted.

The energy was good
on the set, most of all.

Everyone from the...
'Cause Red and Meth,

we believe in treating
our kings like pawns...

- Yeah.
- ...pawns like kings,

so when we walk on a set,
we try to bring

a good energy and I believe that
- All the time.

A good energy on the set
will execute a great movie,

- Infectious.
- At the end of the day.

Well, I have
two phrases I like...

"Moving on.

It's a wrap."

That's when you know you got it.

- And "That line, again?"
- Which one?

No, that's another
line you like.

You said it real smooth,
like you're used
to it and shit.

It was just like, when you...

- Oh, "Line"?
- Yeah, "Line!"

- "Line!"
- I gotta use that.

- You gotta use that?
- I gotta use that.

"Line!"
- See, I've been on a couple

of sets and, you know...
- "Line!

I forgot. Line!"

Yeah. That's all you do.
You just scream out, "Line!"

They'll feed it to you
and then you reset...

- Reset.
- ...and go back at it.

Mm-hmm.

♪♪

Kevin: Okay. Now we go to work.

Good morning, everybody.

♪♪

How are you, Captain?

Gorgeous shots we set up
for you, motherfucker.

- So ready.
- Are ya?

- Good morning everybody.
- Get that fucking thing

outta my face.

Welcome back to the end
of week 2.

So good.

So, take a look.

- Looking.
- This just fell off the truck

here, so we'll adjust.

So, let's take a look.

This is your big 9-wide.

Ooh! That looks mean and cool.

And then, this would be later.

I've just gotta pan
some of the lights off

after we're done with this,
so it doesn't look

too bright
towards the camera
because in theory...

Man, this movie's the gift
that keeps on giving.

Alright, big man,

you distract these racist fucks

while I hotbox in this
fucking berserker.

♪ Berserker! ♪

Oh, you did nice lean in the

- Oh, cool.
- Window, on the dash.

That looks...
- Hang in there, Jay.

It'll be okay, Jay.
It's gonna be okay.

Thanks, baby. You know that?

I hope so. I hope so.

♪ Berserker ♪

♪♪

Hey, Chris.

I'm gonna yell "Chris"
once you start walking.

Alright. Go.

♪♪

We all here?

Who the fuck are you?!

I'm going, anyway.

Let's talk about
something important!

Today is
International Women's Day.

This movie doesn't exist,
we don't have a fucking job,

without the women
who are the people

that produce the movie, man.

Give it up for the international
women on our crew.

Woman: Thank you!

Then, give it up

for our international women
sitting right up in the truck.

Give it up for the girls!

The only reason
we all got jobs tonight is

'cause Liz, Tracey, Jordan,
they've put in their hard time

and effort over the course
of two fucking years

to find the loot
to make this happen, man,

so we get to be here tonight
on the strength

of female empowerment,
thank fucking Christ.

That's the best commercial
for inclusivity

I could think of, man.

So, I thank these ladies
and all the women

in our business from the bottom
of my heart, man.

I get to tell my goofy little
stories because of you guys.

I like to think of myself
as a very powerful individual,

but this man could not
get shit done by himself.

I thank you ladies
for doing it for me.

Let's make a movie,
ladies and gentlemen.

Well, that's not
going anywhere, Josh.

Yeah, that hat is
completely inappropriate.

That hat is really
outta context.

♪♪

Alright, so, tonight was
the second time

I got to work
with the great Chris Jericho.

The first time was in Florida
a couple months back,

on this horror anthology

I'm doing with the kids
in Sarasota

at the Ringling School,
called "Kilroy Was Here."

It reminded me
of the Method and Red shoot,

a shoot from last night.

Going into that night
on "Kilroy,"

you were the X-factor
'cause I was like,

"Well, I've done everything
else, but I've never worked

with Chris.
What will that be like?"

And Chris like hit the ground
fucking running,

so we brought him back and he
made the scene even better

by virtue of the fact that,
when we told 'im,

"Hey, man, you're gonna play
the Klan leader"...

And what's so like ironic
is like Chris is like one

of the sweetest guys
in the world.

Number one, he's raised well.

Number two,
he's raised Canadian.

So even though, of course,
the wrestling personality,

you were both sides, right,
good guy, bad guy?

Well, yeah, but you're
playing a part.

You're playing
a character in that.

And that's one thing I love
about working with you,

the two times we've done it
so far, is that it's not like

"Okay, Chris is gonna be
the bouncer,"

or, "Chris is gonna be
the assassin," whatever.

It's like fun parts.
You do stuff to show

other elements of yourself

as a performer, as an actor, so.

It all comes
from the same place.

Whether you're performing
in wrestling

or whether you're
a Shakespearean actor,

whether you're doing a movie,

you have to commit to it
and connect.

Man, you crushed it tonight.

And that sweetness is Jericho.

There it is. -

This is important.

We don't want anyone
getting hurt

or stressed out, whatsoever.

Any other questions from anybody

about what we're doing? Anyone?

No question, but two statements.

Can I go?

Number one, man,
give it up for the boys

who are taking the shit for us,
ladies and gentlemen.

Many thanks.

Number 2, Eddie had
the joke of the day.

Say it out loud, Eddie.

Shit's about to hit the Klan.

"The shit's
about to hit the Klan."

Well done.

♪♪

♪♪

Alright.

Hey, guys. Have a great week.

Thank you very much.

And that's a picture wrap
on Chris Jericho!

♪♪

You know what's weird?

Is to make
a View Askewniverse movie

in a post-Marvel world
'cause the last time

I was making these movies,
I was the only one

that had a cinematic universe,
you know what I'm saying?

I mean, they made movies
with sequels and shit like that,

but like a universe
where it's like

this movie has a different
title from this movie,

but these characters
know each other

and these characters come
into this movie

and shit like that.
We were able to do that

across a couple different
companies, like Miramax.

Universal had "Mallrats."

Later on, the Weinstein Company
and stuff.

So, you know,
it's the first time

I went back to play
with my movie universe

since Marvel defined,
for most people,

what a movie universe is.

I built my entire life
on the backs...

I sounded like
Matthew McConaughey...

Life!

I built my entire life
on the backs

of these fictional characters

and so to be able to pull 'em
out and play with them again

and put them all
in one movie and stuff?

And at one point,
somebody was like,

"Oh, like
it's like your 'Avengers, '"

and I was like, "No,

'The Avengers' is their 'Jay
and Silent Bob Strike Back.'"

♪♪

We found it, kids.

We're inthe Blunt Cave.
This is crazy.

I thought we'd be doing this
pretty much just greenscreen,

but Nate built a piece
of the Blunt Cave

to interact with,
so it's literally just like

"Jay and Silent Bob
Strike Back."

We got a Blunt Cave again.

So today is greenscreen day
in the Blunt Cave.

It's a four-person scene,

but only one
of the performers is here.

Thankfully, that performer
is the great Melissa Benoist

from "Supergirl,"
and she's used to, on that show,

I know for a fact,
'cause I've seen it,

so it was awesome
when I saw her this morning.

They brought her in very early

to like try on the costume
and shit.

Like I think
she had a 5:00 am pickup

and it's like maybe 9:30
or 10:00 now and stuff,

so she's been waiting
around a minute.

I mean, it was adorable.

She goes, "I don't have
to act like Jay, do I?"

I was like, "You do whatever
you want in that role."

So we're gonna play
in the Blunt Cave today,

day 1 of 2.

Kevin was telling me

apparently, you're
very good at this, so...

We have the right person
for today.

- Alright.
- Whatever we can do to help.

- Thank you.
- Alright. Here we go.

Here we go.
This'll be the first one.

First one of the day!

Lend this fine actress
your energy,

ladies and gentlemen.

- Here we go.
- And... action!

♪♪

Bluntma-a-a-a-a-n!

♪♪

Oh, she just turned her body.

Kevin Smith is quite possibly

the best person in the
industry to work with

because his sets are different

than any set
you will everwalk on.

It's... Music's playing

and everyone's clapping
between every take.

He's so supportive
and encouraging and like

literally the sweetest,
biggest softie you'll ever meet

and he just wants
everyone to have fun,

so that just innately
brings out the best in people.

I didn't even mean to do that.

♪♪

♪♪

Welcome back
to a View Askewniverse picture,

Rosario Dawson!

♪♪

Alright, so, this is
day 5, 6... 6, 7?

No, 6. No, 11. Fuck.
- He can count.

I know. Math? No good.

English? Pretty good.

Eleven... Day 11

on "Jay and Silent Bob Reboot."

It took us 11 fucking
days to get to this.

Rosario is here.

How has it been to be back
in View Askewland?

Incredible.

I love you. I missed you.

I'm sorry I couldn't
bring my daughter,

so we could have playdates.

I think it's so funny
that we're all grown-ups now

and still up to shenanigans.

And... action. Action.

Jussie!

Hey.

I'm massaging a fake person
in front of me.

No, I'm just enjoying.

I don't know why
I'm like fake...

You should've brought some,
then we could show!

Can you?

Look, man!
Shannon's back. Say hi.

- Hi!
- See, it wasn't really a sequel.

We're not quite sure
what the movie is.

It's called "Jay
and Silent Bob Reboot,"

and that's more of a joke
and a play on like,

you know, make fun
of reboots and stuff,

but, technically, this movie's
what they call a requel,

which is a reboot
and a sequel at the same time,

which is kind of what
"Force Awakens" was.

But erase all that
modern-day terminology.

It did not feel like a sequel

until yesterday,
when Shannon came on set

and suddenly it was like
"Oh, shit!

This is literally part 2."

What does it feel
like to be back?

Amazing! So much fun

and I'm so grateful
you included me.

How could I not, man?

We literally couldn't move
forward on the story

without the mom
and you're the mom

and it's also like
the nice idea of like,

"I've watched that movie
for years," and it was like,

"That relationship
would never fucking work,"

so we get to say, "Of course
it didn't fucking work,"

but like something came
from it and shit.

But, Shannon's doing
the Lord's work, man.

Like, fucking...
We had to bring her

out of Africa because...
Literally out of Africa

because she's over there
doing the noble shit.

Tell 'em what you do.

I'm living in South Africa
right now,

working on my foundation,

the Shannon Elizabeth
Foundation,

and we're doing
initiatives to help

with the poaching crisis
and help change laws

and help buy some like land
to protect the land

and uplift the
surrounding community

and build a lodge

and we're about to come out
with Rhino Review,

which will be one of our
first big initiatives.

I fucking nearly cried when you
just told that story again,

but fucking, doesn't that make
you ashamed that you're like,

"We want Justice back
in the movie"?

You stopping this woman
from saving an elephant,

you pricks,
'cause of your nostalgia,

'cause of your sentimentality.

"Oh, we need Justice back."

Let this poor woman
go back to Africa

and rescue the big fucking
five, you pricks.

You're doing the Lord's work.

Thank you.

Come on. Fucking anybody saving
fucking elephants and rhinos?

What have you done
with your day?

Jerked off. Am I right?

Me too.

Yay!

My wife!

Give it up for Rosario!

She's getting out of here, man.

♪♪

Thank you, everybody!

It was great to sweat
with all of you.

She's a mess.

♪♪

She's killed squirrels, dude.

- What?!
- No!

She's killed three
squirrels, yeah.

- Well, here?
- Oh.

- Take it back.
- Put that dog down.

Woman:
She licked her mouth
right as you said that.

Look! Look! It's you.

Look! Look!

She's like, "I don't care."

♪♪

Dano...

I walked from this movie

with the most important
life lesson...

On the best jobs,
you actually grow as a person.

- Yes.
- Dano has a wonderful...

I don't know
if he intentionally did it.

- Mm-hmm.
- But, anytime I'd jump

out of my manager bag,

Dano had
this wonderful way of...

He goes, "Nobody's saying no."
- Yeah, no.

I'm not... Listen, Kevin.
- "I'm not saying no."

Kevin, I'm not saying no to you,

but I need to explain...
- Not just the sentiment,

but the arm touch
that made me go, "Oh, my god.

I am behaving
like a child, aren't I?"

'Cause only a child is like,
"What do you mean, we can't?!"

And he's like,
"I'm not saying no."

There are 9 days left to our
show and we started with 21,

so, obviously, we're at less
than half at this point.

I can do math, simple math.
And simple math tells me

that it's all slipping
away very quickly,

as it does every day
in life and whatnot.

"Like sands
through the hourglass,

these are the days
of our lives."

My mother used to watch
that soap opera.

But it's almost fucking done.

And I realize
there have been times,

as we've been making the movie,

where, through stress
of production or whatever,

that perhaps you've seen me jump
out of my manager bag.

If you ever saw me get testy

with the man without whom
we're not standing here,

the guy without whom I don't get

to make this journey,
in the first place,

the guy who said funny shit
to me when he was 16 years old

and I was like, "I could build
an entire fucking career

on that and shit,"

then, if I'm being testy
to that guy,

then who the fuck am I?

So, it's not a big deal...

It's not like people
came up to me and said like,

"You should fucking say shit,"
but, I got a conscience

and as I sat there
cutting footage,

I see a version
of myself sometimes

that I'd prefer not to be,
particularly when it comes

to my fucking good friend
Jason Mewes.

So I just want to take a moment

to apologize to Jason
for any time

that I ever got short
with him and stuff like that.

That's not the person he is
to me and, sadly, it's...

You know, you learn some shit
about yourself in production

and what I learned
is that, under stress,

I will target the people
who are closest to me,

thinking like they can take it.

There's no reason in the world
he should take it.

I wouldn't be here without him.
So, I'm sorry, bro.

Now you make a speech!

♪♪

So, Brian's back and we're
doing Brian in multiple roles.

So he starts the movie
as Dante Hicks with a Van Dyke.

A lot of people are like,
"Goatee!"

It's not a fucking goatee.
It's a Van Dyke.

Then, he comes back
as Grant Hicks,

the TV news journalist
from "Dogma,"

hence, all he has to do is
shave this part, the Van Dyke,

and turn it into a mustache.

Then, he will shave it
a third time

and take the mustache
completely off

and he'll be playing
Brian O'Halloran at the con.

What is it like to be
the new Walt Flanagan,

the new Lon Chaney
of the 21st century?

Well, I gotta say that,

when I first read
the whole script

and saw the roles
that were out there,

I'm like, "
This is a perfect chance

to bring in every Hicks
that ever lived!"

- This is the movie for it, man.
- Right.

You know, there's so much
going on in this,

like me playing three roles
will be a blink in the eye,

compared to what else
is going on in this film.

And will absolutely
be delightful

for like true fans who are like,
"There's Brian!"

There's Brian! There's Brian!"

Man, so it's totally
worth doing it,

and Brian's cool
about coming back

'cause we shot Dante
and the exterior Quick Stop,

like week 1
or something like that.

So here we are in week 3
and he's back for this

and then you're back in week 4
for the con, man.

He's with us three of the four
weeks we're shooting.

♪♪

Is that too much,
or is that cool?

- No, you wanna see
that it's blowing.
- Oh, my God!

You look like you fucking
looked 10 years ago.

It's...

- Oh, you're doing slow-motion
on the whole dance?
- Eddie?

- Oh, wow. Okay.
- Yeah. What do you got?

♪♪

♪♪

Kevin: Beautiful. I'm happy.

Shannon came all the way
from Africa

and fucking crushed it.
Give it up for Shannon.

And there's somebody
whose performance

was eerily convincing
as he got railed from behind.

Give it up for Jason Mewes.

And give it up for the dirty
little cuck who watched,

Brian O'Halloran, man.

♪♪

So today is airport day.

Look, this is the airport
in New Orleans.

If you were to come in
for Mardi Gras

or any other reason, man...
There's lots of reasons

to come to New Orleans,
not just Mardi Gras.

But like let's say you were
a college kid and you're like,

"Oh, I'm gonna get fucked up
at Mardi Gras,"

you come in this airport.

This ain't movie magic.

This is a real airport, man.

We flew in here
to make the movie

and, now, we get to make
the movie here at the airport.

So incredibly weird
to be at the airport

with no travel agenda
whatsoever, man.

We're gonna shoot
some funny fucking shit.

♪♪

I'll get back there.

Bye!

Guy!

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

Yeah? Fuck your airplane!

Alright. Bye-bye.

Bye, y'all.

Go fuck yourself.

Do it again under my breath.

Let me do it one more time.

Those things, I kind of made up.

The great Molly Shannon!

♪♪

♪♪

Wow.

♪♪

Here we are at Mooby's,

an eatery that absolutely
exists in the real world.

It was once a beignet place.

Now, it serves fake burgers,
all because of this man.

You crushed on movies.

- Thank you, sir.
- How do you feel?

I feel like I did it.

I'm eating it.
- That's damn skippy.

Now, there are
three big showpieces

that you had to worry about
this whole movie...

The Quick Stop,
which you crushed.

This, which you crushed.

All that's left is Chronic-Con.

How do you feel about that?

I feel like I'm gonna
lose some sleep, still.

♪♪

Cigarettes?

We weren't smoking
cigarettes, man.

We were smoking that weed!

You're smoking marijuana?

Oh! You guys are so brave!

Once again, you got busted
by the cops, so.

I haven't tried weed
my whole life.

"You guys are so brave."

Kevin really hangs out.

He like really is around,
as opposed to just disappearing

behind a screen
or a tent or something.

He's just there, which is great.

So the vibe is fantastic.

Now, what if the vibe was bad?

I would go like this. I'd go,

"It's, um,
very interesting and...

sometimes we feed
off the tension."

That's how I would present it.

I'd spin it into a positive,
but that's what I would say.

Working with Jay...
Because I know Kevin,

I was a little starstruck

because I see Jay
as such a real character

that, watching him, I'm always
like, "Is that guy real?"

'Cause just his style, the way
he talks and stuff,

I'm like, "Is that accent real?"

So, meeting him...
I've never met him before...

I was a little starstruck.

It was like seeing a unicorn
or something.

I was like, "Wow.
That's the actual guy,"

and his hair really is long,

which is another weird thing,
where I'm like,

"That must be a wig,"
and it was not a wig.

Two cameras. A-mark.

B-mark.

Somebody out here yell
"action" for me, too,

so Kevin can hear it.

And then...

'Cause you're wasting
him so far away.

You know what I'm saying?
- We got a pitch, real quick.

- Got a little pitch.
- Mandel's got a pitch.

Eventually, take it right up
to the window.

Go right up to the window,
so you're like,

"Help me, help me."
- And then, just before he's

about to pound, you guys
grab him after that.

You could be screaming
the whole time.

We'll just be oblivious.

- So no running...
- Start there.

Yeah, you could totally
start there,

but eventually head up there.

Turn around and go this way.

What the hell?!

He was like, "Why don't you
have him run up to the window?"

I was like, "Well,
because I'm stupid."

And so that worked out
very nicely.

Thank you.

♪♪

Hey, before we get going, man,

welcome to the family
Kate Micucci,

ladies and gentlemen!

It's a great time. There's a lot
of cheering that happens.

There's a lotta like,
"Here we go!

Let's give it up
for like so-and-so."

Like, you get pumped up
in a way that like,

before you have every take,

you're like feeling like
a million bucks,

and that's kind of special.

Unh-unh.

You did not just offer me
your old-man dick!

Okay, fine!

Whip it out! Come on!

I wanna show you a magic trick

where I take one cock
and make two dicks!

Miss McKenzie!

What the fuck is going on here?

This old fool
just eggplanted me!

I'm 47, and I have
no idea what that means.

One of my favorite moments
of "Reboot"

was being able
to give Silent Bob

his first on-screen kiss,
as Miss McKenzie,

so,

that was funny.

So, tonight, we made history

on the set
of "Jay and Silent Bob Reboot."

I've been playing
this character for 25 years.

Silent Bob has never
had an on-screen kiss,

with the exception of the...
Where are you going?

Get the fuck in here.
- I didn't know that
you were shooting.

I like...
- We were waiting

- I didn't see the microphone.
- For you.

We set it up so you could

dramatically enter and shit.

Married to the world's
worst filmmaker.

- Amateur!
- Total amateur, am I right?

I'm just kidding.
I wasn't talking about Jen.

He was yelling at me
to come outside.

I didn't know that...
- May I go back to my piece?

- No.
- Silent Bob

never had an on-screen kiss.

Once, Suzanne the orangutan
kissed him,

at the end of "Jay
and Silent Bob Strike Back."

And, if you watch the face
of the actor

playing the character Silent Bob

when that orangutan goes in
for the kiss...

Sheer terror.

No performance.

Tonight was the exact same thing

because Silent Bob
had his first on-screen kiss

with a human being
and it was sheer terror.

It was almost
the same expression.

But the good news is
the kiss was with her,

so I've had tons
of fucking practice, man.

My wife, Jennifer. Say hello.

- Hello.
- So Jen comes back...

Okay, well, why were you scared

about the on-screen
kiss with me?

The beat was played with...
Just shut the fuck up.

Oh, my God.
You're ruining everything.

Stand here and just look pretty.

Fuck. -

You stand here
and just look pretty.

- Anyway.
- Knock that cap off your head

- Don't do it.
- And see what happens.

The hair comes with it.

Don't do it.

Tonight, we kissed.
Although, now,

I'm fucking starting to have
regrets and second feelings...

I don't wanna... So fucking...

Anyway, we kissed.
- I have a question.

Come on in.

I see there's a question
from the audience.

Yes, young stranger.

Do you feel like it was
more terrifying

getting ready to do
your first on-screen kiss

with a lady, being your wife,

or watching your wife

make out with someone else?

'Cause I think
it was more horrifying,

the latter. Is that correct?

Did I say it right, the latter?

So what, because she made out

with Brian O'Halloran
in "Clerks"?

Yeah, it upset me to see that.

Even though it was acting,
it was acting,

but, you know,
I didn't wanna see that.

I don't... So wait, the root
of your question is what?

Would I rather watch her
make out with Brian O'Halloran

or make out with myself?

The answer is...
- No. What was more terrifying?

What was more terrifying,
your first kiss?

You said you were terrified.
- Why was I...

There was no... I was terrified
when I had to kiss the orangutan

'cause I thought it was
gonna eat my face,

but here I wasn't
terrified at all.

I've got 20 years' practice

macking on this
fine piece of woman.

Oh.

So, yeah, it was like
it was typecasting.

There was no acting, whatsoever.

They said, "Action,"
and I wasn't acting.

It was all real.

He was no vegan
in that situation.

End of story.
- No vegan?

Yeah, he was kissing

- Hey.
- Girls.

- You wanted to go someplace
- Girls?

so fucking dirty - Girls?

- And you forgot my wife
- Girls?!

- Was standing right there.
- I forgot #MeMewes.

Yeah. Fuck.

♪♪

Alright, Fred, here we go.
Thank you for waiting.

Alright, everybody,
Fred Armisen on the roof!

♪♪

Chris, stand by.
Ready? Here we go.

Now, this upper hand
is holding some scalding-hot

hater! tots!

It's the end of week 3, man.

Three weeks into this bitch
and, now, it's all fucking over.

I have so much footage
I could cut.

We've now shot more
of the movie than not

and all that's left
is the third act, man.

All next week, and then,
a few days after that,

we'll be doing the Chronic-Con.

So, this is it, man.

I'm eating it.

♪♪

Playing with our continuity,
you know, was...

We'd play pretty strict,
and then fast and loose.

People would always come to me
and, "What about this?"

I'm like, "No, no, no.
That happened to these people."

Like, somebody at Chronic-Con

was carrying a copy
of "Mallrats"

and, you know, I saw it
in the frame and I was like,

"No. 'Mallrats'
is the story of their lives.

'Mallrats' can't happen here."

You know, since Kevin Smith
is a character in the movie,

that complicates things
even more 'cause it's like,

well, we all know Kevin Smith
made "Mallrats,"

but in the world of View Askew,

in the View Askewniverse,
Kevin Smith didn't.

♪♪

♪♪

- Alright. Now...
- Folks, we're about to take

a look at the future, man.

Give it up for the folks
we're gonna spend

the first part
of the morning with.

Diedrich Bader's here, man!

Returning royalty from "Jay
and Silent Bob Strike Back."

And then behind him, out that
door, there's Keith Coogan.

- What?!
- Keith Coogan's here, man.

And, of course, as always,
Jason Mewes.

Alright. So.

Right?

I've been on a bunch
of cult movies

and it's really fun
to be a part of that

because people that love it
truly love it.

It's really genuine and sweet
and it's a lovely thing

because here's the thing
about Kevin.

Everything that he does
really comes from his heart.

He's a genuinely nice person
and so,

when he talks about cons

and about people
that come to Comic-Con,

it comes from a place
of real love and respect

and it's not to make fun
of these people,

but it's to have fun with them.

Jay and Silent Bob
are still so appealing

because they are the everyman
and every fan can crawl in

and be like Jay and Silent Bob
because they don't understand

that they're the heroes
of the piece.

Still got it!

I know. I know.

Hilarious.

♪♪

This is a panel room
at Blunt-Con, man.

Like I've sat on many a panel
over my professional career

as Kevin Smith and this is
what it looks like, so,

in "Jay and Silent Bob
Strike Back,"

we took you into one part
of my world,

which was moviemaking,
so we went to Miramax Studios

and busted in on various
movies getting made.

In "Jay and Silent Bob Reboot,"

we enter my other world,
which is con world.

The first "Jay and Silent Bob,"

I remember we did it in L.A.

I remembered it was
one afternoon.

One afternoon.

And I must say,

based on the amount of time

it took to shoot that movie,
the response...

Versus the response.

The ratio of work
to response is... Yeah.

It's the most outsized

of any project I've ever done.

I get a lotta
"Jay and Silent Bob"
as well.

- Same. Same.
- Yeah. It's pretty crazy.

I mean, Kevin has the best
fans in the world, right?

Like the most dedicated,

will go see anything he does.

They love him. It's amazing.

Best fans in the world,
except for my fans.

Love you.

My fans suck because

any fan of mine must be
a complete moron, so...

I've been literally
waiting for them to do

a "Jay and Silent Bob"
reboot for 13 years.

I was like,
"They're never going to,"

but I've just basically
been waiting

for the phone to ring,
for this reason.

- Just kept his schedule clear.
- Clear.

Man: Oh!

♪♪

Kevin:
They came allthe way
from fucking New Jersey, man.

Give it up for Bryan,
Walt, Ming, and Mike.

Why is Hollywood so infatuated

with the reboot thing,
the remake?

I personally think it boils
down to two things...

One, money, just easy money...
- Okay.

...and two, there are
no original ideas anymore.

There were never
any original ideas, but...

No, I think that's the answer

that everybody likes to give

and bash Hollywood.

Everybody's always
bashing Hollywood.

Poor Hollywood, right?
What did they ever do?

I think it's genius that
he's taking the reboot

into his own hands
and kind of mocking it.

Yeah. As only Kevin Smith can...

- Yeah.
- ...which is kind of awesome.

♪♪

Mark!

♪♪

♪♪

So, in the flick,
we got to do a "Clerks" scene

and bring everybody back
for a "Clerks" panel

at Chronic-Con and it was
surreal and wonderful

because, 26 years
after we made that movie,

here we all are,
making another movie.

It's kinda nuts and stuff.
So it was great

and it was one of the only
special effects shots

in the entire movie,
which is ironic

because the first movie
was made for like 27 grand.

The shot of the "Clerks"
crew in this movie

cost more than "Clerks" cost.

♪♪

Okay, so this is Chronic-Con,
which is...

The idea is that, in the movie,

"Bluntman and Chronic"
was a real movie back in 2001,

built a small fan base,

and resulted in this
Chronic-Con.

A bunch of fans put on
a convention based

around love of this old movie.

But how we got
to Chronic-Con was more...

It wasn't my first idea.

Originally, Jay and Silent Bob

were headed to Comic-Con,
in San Diego,

and then I started thinking
about it logically

and I was like, "I can't get
the licenses for 'Batman, '

'Spiderman, ' 'Wonder Woman, '"

blah blah blah, anything,
you know, 'Avatar, '

anything you would
like to see at a real con."

If you go
to San Diego Comic-Con,

you see a bunch of fucking IP,
intellectual property,

and I couldn't pull that off,
so I started thinking like,

"Well, if I can't get,
like, licenses for everything,

how can I do a con?"

I said, "You got some.

You own some IP.

You know,
why don't you use yours?"

So, suddenly, it shifted

to Chronic-Con
instead of Comic-Con

and, suddenly, the plot of the
movie shifted along with it

and stuff, so necessity being
the mother of invention,

I didn't do all this
'cause I'm like,

"I just wanna walk into a room
filled with thousands of me."

No. We're only doing this

because this is ultimately,
ironically enough, cheaper.

That is fucking phenomenal.

Look at that. Show that.

Look at this!

Fuck, I love that, man.

That's amazing.

All sorts of variations

of Jays and Silent Bobs

and whatnot, so it's kooky.

♪♪

- Morning.
- Shit.

♪♪

And this is not?

Yeah.

- And this is also not?
- This is also not.

Fuck that take. Fuck it!

Fudge this.
Too much information.

The camera loves you, Jay.

♪♪

This time around, you know,

I think, if people had shown up

and we just kind of
gave them the show

that we told them we were
making, which was like,

"They go to Hollywood
to stop the movie, again,"

it would've been,
you know, disappointing.

I think people would've
been like, "Oh. Oh.

It is actually the same movie.

I thought you were
joking around."

Instead, we kinda
give them something...

We give them the feels.

♪♪

♪♪

I love laughing,
don't get me wrong,

but to feel shit?
That's everything.

Like not just feel happy
through laughter,

but just to feel something
that's quasi-real,

something that pulls
your fucking heartstrings,

the kind of shit that makes
you scream out during,

you know, an "Avengers" movie
or something like that.

That's where my head is,
these days.

Um,

I don't know
a lotta stuff, okay?

But I do know this, is

you're a great fucking kid

and some asshole

really missed out

on being your dad.

♪♪

Thanks.

♪♪

Woman: Oh, my God, you guys.

That's wonderful.

What a great scene.

To be able to pull that off

with those fucking characters,

that's a fucking magic trick.

They'll never give me
an award for that

and I don't give a shit 'cause
that's what fucking matters.

You're very, very great
at your job, Mewes.

Wow.

Oh, my God.

"Oh, that's good.
That almost made me cry,"

and I was like,
"What good writing,"

and I remembered I wrote it.

- Wow.
- Yeah, right? Yeah?

- Welcome to my life.
- I need to step away from that.

Not all of us are in the new
Quentin Tarantino movie.

Some of us have to seek for our
glory where we can find it.

Hey, sir. You get plenty
of compliments.

Let's settle down, now.

I don't think Tarantino
shot a scene

with two other Tarantinos
walking around in costume.

Well, this is only
his ninth film.

Give him to the tenth.
- Marker!

♪♪

Alright, guys.
Let's get going, please.

Pictures next.

♪♪

As sort of an inside joke
to those who know,

I play a character called
Ted Underhill

and the boys steal
my credit card number

to use throughout the
remainder of the film, so,

you'll only see me
for a short time,

but I live on
throughout the film.

My first pet was Bingo!

I don't know. 7 inches!

Alright.

Yeah, I'll hold.

Cut.

After Kevin's heart attack,

I think everyone is
just so happy

to be working with him again
and to be around him again

and it's such
a joyous experience

and, such a great victory lap
for two great characters

from Kevin's films
to come back in this way,

so, just that he asked me
to be part of it is huge.

That is a picture wrap
on Ralph Garman...

- Yay!
- ...ladies and gentlemen!

Let's slide that speed
over about like 3 feet?

♪♪

- What time is it?
- 2:35.

2:35?! What a horrible thing
to do to an actor,

but if there is anyactor
who can handle it,

it's Dan Fogler.

Give it up for him,
ladies and gentlemen.

Bee!

Bee bee!

Ooh!

Security!

And cut. Give it up for Dan.

Arm is...

Like when I was growing up,
I couldn't...

I couldn't wear my hat backwards

and a long trench coat
without people saying,

"Hey, Silent Bob!"
You know?

And I was like, "Hey, no!
I'm me!" You know?

But he was such a huge
influence on my childhood,

so it's so cool to just be
here working with him.

Ladies and gentlemen, that's
a picture wrap on Dan Fogler!

Give it up for 'im!

♪♪

I'm proud of you.

Ooh!

Chronic-Con finished, done.

We shot here at the Hilton
for 3 days.

It looked amazing, looked real.

Everyone's cosplay was
fucking astounding,

creative, wonderful and stuff.

It's just good times, man.

Like, this is a big sequence
in the movie

that leads into
our final sequence,

which we start tomorrow,
but glorious, man.

Life has a lot of pros and cons,

but Chronic-Con,
pun intended, is very pro.

♪♪

A-buh-buh-buh-buh, buh-buh.

Right now, we're about
to shoot with Tommy Chong,

which is a real honor
for those of us

who grew up watching
those movies, but Tommy is 80,

so we may be moving
at a different pace.

Let's all look out
for him and stuff.

We've got to make sure
we hand the world back an icon

unscathed and stuff.

Give it up for Tommy Chong!

♪♪

He's right.

You can't take chances
with an old guy.

Man: Who's old?

It's kind of good you're
not using the real shit.

Or else it would be...
It would be one take.

One and done.

Here we go. And action.

Smells like this reboot...
went up in smoke.

♪♪

♪♪

We just finished
with Tommy Chong.

I might just be finished myself.

We paid "oh-mage,"
homage, if you will,

to the man who laid the track

upon which our
stoner-movie engine travels.

That guy did it first.

♪♪

♪♪

Jay: Oh, you made him mad.

He's mad now!

♪ Na, da-da-da,
and the night and da ♪

Unh!

Welcome to the show!

Returning royalty from

"Jay and Silent Bob
Strike Back."

Joe Reitman's here, man!

♪♪

Kevin: Okay.

Man: "Reboot" stepping up.

Two cameras, A mark.

Kevin: Dress, then wig, Alice,

and then whip
the hair back and forth,

as one of
Will Smith's kids told us.

Action!

I am secret agent from Russia!

Kevin: It is like
5:00 in the morning,

and Alice is being
tasked to act.

It's been ridiculous.
Give it up for Alice.

Take us there, Alice.

Jay: I'm saying I'm your father.

Did you know this shit?

Nyet.

That was good.

♪♪

♪♪

Okay. so we're at Chronic-Con,

and Chronic-Con
is a pop-culture convention,

and so if you're
talking pop culture,

you need to talk to somebody
who knows about pop culture.

I've turned to the co-host
of celebrated podcast

"Fatman Beyond," Marc Bernardin.

Hey. What's up?

Coming out to act like...

Tell them who you're
playing in the movie.

I'm playing a sleeping person.

Named?

Marc Bernardin.

Marc came this far
to play himself.

Isn't that amazing, man?

He's literally in the audience

as Marc Bernardin.

And so we actu...
We get to advertise

our podcast
because we know a guy.

We got this on camera.

Pretty sweet.

Don't have to get
any clearances.

None whatsoever. Excellent.

Free ad, man.
Juice us up a little bit.

What does it feel like
to come out

and fuck around in a movie?

It feels kind of surreal
but super cool.

I'm gonna stretch
my acting chops.

I haven't done much
since my years

studying under Stella Adler,
but I figured, like...

I'll bring it for you,
the high heat.

It's all about
sense memory, man.

Or is it muscle memory?

I think the Stella Adler method
is all about muscle memory.

It's like... ch-ch!

Type fuckin' pull guns.

Man: Holy shit!

The guy that's not Kevin Smith
just got fisted!

Man #2: And he
didn't even use lubricant!

And cut! Give it up for the boy!

♪♪

That's it.

So it's basically three moves,
four moves.

Back fist, get the stick,
hit a guy,

look over here, hit a guy,

turn around back-to-back,
and then a slapshot... tch!

You're gonna back-fist this guy.

Boom! Okay?

He's gonna fly
out of frame there.

Here comes Mr. Guy here.

You're gonna go... wham! Okay?

Right when you do that,
you see Jay,

and you guys are gonna go
back-to-back... aha!

And action!

Unh!

Three, two, one, boom!

Here we go. Ready, and action!

♪♪

That joint you gave me
really came in handy.

Whatever you do, don't tell
your mom I gave you weed!

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

Kevin: Oh, yes.

Oh, that's so awesome.

This is why we did the movie.

Look at this shit,
ladies and gentlemen.

Give it up for Team Kurtzman.

Man: And background action.

Man #2: Ready!

Man: And action!

♪♪

Post or something,
but they were like,

"We can't give any of that..."

No, this is totally
awesome..."stuff just right now.

It's secret until
the movie comes out."

Right, no.
That's totally awesome.

Thank you so much, man. Of course, brother.

Happy birthday, brother. Thank you.

Man:
Can you hold it up
for the camera?

Yeah, yeah. Yes.

See what it says?

"Thanks for keeping us
all awake, my man."

Bleep.

Jay:
I missed picture wrap again?

Dude, I had Josh outside,
asking him something,

and I missed it all.

You didn't see the picture wrap?

No, it's my fault, dude.

I had him outside.

Beautiful speech I gave.

"That's a picture wrap
on the girls, girls, girls."

You hear screaming
and all this stuff.

Big speech from daddy
and the director,

but I missed it all.

Not only did I miss it,

I made the guy
behind the camera miss it,

filming it, having it.

I'm sorry.
And, by the way, "Daddy"?

That's... That's... That's him.

I don't go around telling people
to call me Daddy on set.

But, yes, because of this
Lloyd, he took that Lloyd,

and we missed
the beautiful picture wrap.

That was perhaps the most poetic
I've ever been in my life.

No, I'm actually glad.

I referred to the kid
as Batman Junior,

and my wife was like,
"That's what you went with?"

And now I just double hit it.

Fuck. What an idiot.
Anyway, let's back on him.

He pulled the camera away,
and we missed the girls' wrap.

So the girls' wrap, this is
the last night of the girl gang,

and as you can see,
this fucking kid's a mess.

Apparently, we just raised her
in a room

full of pillows and clouds
because look at that.

Shut up!

Look at that.

You know me.
Like, I cry at Marvel stuff

and whatnot, but...

You cry... you just cried
like 5 minutes ago.

♪♪

Aww!

♪♪

Woman: "Best Dad in the Galaxy."

Man: What's, uh...
How do we... How do we...

How do we do this?
Door's locked.

He runs in, tries to shake it,
can't get out, two...

Go in the driveway
and drag him away.

Everyone's going.

♪♪

Hopefully,
we've all gotten, like,

the emotional stuff
out of the way,

the real emotional stuff,
so we can shoot

the fake emotional stuff,
as we head into the scene.

But a lot of people here
who I deeply love today

added to the cast, man.

Of course,
we're gonna be carried,

as always, by Christ himself.

Give it up for Jason Mewes.

This person is the only reason

that I know that I could be
a writer when I was a kid.

I found some writing she had
done and said, "What's this?"

And she said,
"I'm writing a book."

And I said, "What do you mean?"

And she's like, "I'm writing
a story about me and my friends.

We go on an adventure."

And I'd never heard that before.

I was like, "You can't
just write a book.

You've got to ask the fucking
government or some shit."

And she was like, "No,
anybody can write anything.

You know, if you want
to write one day, you can."

And it took me a little while,

and one day I started
writing and stuff.

So I don't get here without her,
and she was in "Chasing Amy"

and allows me to kind of
continue the story

that we told
at the end of the movie.

This scene is basically a sequel
to "Chasing Amy,"

as close as we'll ever get, man,

and it happens, ironically,
in the middle of a fucking

"Jay and Silent Bob" picture.

But my sister came back.

Give it up for Virginia.

We don't get to tell this story
in this scene at all whatsoever

if I don't meet this
other person, man,

and I told her this morning.

I was like, all these trucks

came to this parking lot
in New Orleans,

and a lot of people
jumped on planes,

and a lot of people
rearranged their lives

because her and I met years ago.

That's what a powerful,
impactful person she was.

I did some of the greatest
fucking things

I'll ever do in my career,

some of the greatest art
I ever made with these cats,

and "Chasing Amy"
begins and ends, really,

with Joey Adams. Joey.

And this, I fucking...

I just lost it this morning
and wept in a man's arms,

and it felt so fucking good,
and I asked him questions

about where I am in life
and stuff like that.

Sometimes it's important
to give yourself

over to something
far more powerful than you,

and I did that when I got
to hug somebody

I hadn't hugged in a long time,

and I was just
so fucking relieved,

so glad,
every tear spent was about,

"I missed you. I just wanted
to come fucking play,"

and we're getting
to do that today.

And not only
did he fucking come out,

which until I walked
in the trailer,

I was like,
"We're being punked."

Not only that,
but, like, he came to play.

In rehearsal, he just spit out
eight pages

of the fucking biggest
tongue-twisting dialogue

on the planet,

almost like it was
a test of our friendship,

but he was like,
"I fucking passed."

Ladies and gentlemen,
give it up for Ben Affleck.

Alright.

We ain't done this in 23 years.

Let's try it again.

"Chasing Amy" was the movie
that kind of saved my career,

and also I made it
with those kids,

with Joey, Jason, and Ben,
kids that I met on "Mallrats"

and stuff, and this was like us
doing it down in the dirt,

250,000 grand.

I believed in them.

Like, the studio wanted
other people,

but I was like, "We'll take
less money to do it like this.

This is an important part of
who I am, of my mythos."

You know, Kevin was the first
person to offer me,

like, a lead role,

you know, to sort of like
believe in me for a movie

that was actually
gonna be distributed

and that someone was gonna do
and really leveraged

a lot of his personal
credibility believing in me

just because he had met me
on "Mallrats,"

and we had kind of made friends.

And he wrote this
beautiful script,

and he just called me
and offered it to me.

It was the first time I didn't
have to audition for a movie.

It was the first time
I really felt like a director,

you know, really believed in me
and took a chance on me,

and I've always been grateful
to him for that.

I mean, I feel like Kevin's film
is different than a lot of...

I think a lot of remakes
are sometimes just because

"The film was successful,
and let's make another."

But with Kevin's film, it feels,

not to sound too,
like, literary,

but, like, very Faulkner-esque
in the sense

that he's created
this world and this...

I kind of think of it
as a county,

but it's like New Jersey
and these people from there,

and, you know, they've gone
in and out of all his works.

So for him to want to do this
reboot is more than just like,

"Let's make another
'Jay and Silent Bob.'"

It's like, "Let's bring my
entire body of work,

you know, into one film."

To play with those characters
again and be like,

"What are they doing now?"
oh, my god, I was in heaven.

Ben: You know, Kevin has always
written like...

Even though some of these
"Jay and Bob" movies

can be just,
like, sort of broad or funnier

or slapstickier, or like,
as he said,

dick and fart jokes, you know,
he has a deceptive kind of...

All that belies
a sort of deep feeling

that comes out in his writing,
so I think it was natural

that he would write
about having children,

since obviously he's done such
a great job raising his own.

Kevin: And action.

She wants to know
who daddy's talking to.

Hi, little pink sugar heart.

Say hello to daddy's friends,
the kind of men you're going

to have to learn to stay away
from when you get older.

That's Jay,
and that's Silent Bob.

Yeah. Well, what did you say?

I said these are the kind
of guys you're gonna

have to learn to stay away
from when you get older.

This is daddy's friend Jay
and daddy's friend Silent...

I have to stay them away
when I get older?

Why?

Well, I'll explain that
to you when,

you know, when
the appropriate time comes,

but for now, boys,
this is our daughter Amy.

Say hello to Jay and Silent Bob.

Hi, Jay and Silent Bob.

Hi, pretty.

I saw you in the movie,
and you were so awesome.

I want to see...
You want me to do it, too?

Is that good?

And then we come over here.

Thank you so much.

Alright, guys,
I'm turning into a pumpkin.

I just want to say
thank you very much.

Man: Thank you very much.

This is the man
who gave me my start,

my whole career,
my whole new world.

"Good Will Hunting,"
"Chasing Amy,"

I wouldn't have them
without him.

Thank you, Kevin.
I appreciate it.

Thank you, all.
It was a pleasure.

Give it up for Ben!

That's a picture
wrap on Ben Affleck!

That's a picture
wrap on Virginia... Oh, fuck.

I was gonna call you Smith...

Virginia Sheridan!
Well done, everybody.

Thank you.

Oh! Mwah!

And that is a picture wrap
on Joey Lauren Adams,

ladies and gentlemen.

♪♪

♪♪

Whoo! Whoo!

♪♪

Before we go,
thank you, everybody,

from the bottom of my heart.

This movie
is fucking phenomenal.

I can't believe we made it
in 21 days, but we did,

and I got the footage
to prove it.

Looks fucking phenomenal.

Everyone did a fantastic job.

I fought coming down to
Louisiana because I was like,

"It can't possibly look like
everything we need it to look."

Not only did it look like
everything we needed to look,

but this crew was
fucking phenomenal.

You're all welcome on any show
I do in the future, man.

Y'all brought talent,
proficiency,

heart to the project, man.

You've put your all into it
and stuff, so I thank you, man.

It's been an overwhelming
21 days.

It's been a very emotionally
overwhelming day,

but I'm relatively sure that we
got everything we needed, man.

That was weird.

I had to work 25 years
to get a day like that, man.

That's a real legacy day,
and you were all here for it,

one of the greatest days I ever
had on a movie set in my life,

working with my kids again, man.

I was so fucking proud.

I can't even relate what it was.

One thing for them to be good
in the movie, that's fine,

but they came
so fucking prepared.

We're done.

Like, we could have been
sitting there

for another 3 fucking hours,
but everyone was on point.

The cast knew all their lines.

Fuckin' crew was ready
to shoot the shit out of it,

and we did it, man.

I am just the guy that's like,
"I want to do a bunch of shit.

This would be fun.
This would be fun."

It takes very capable,
smart people

to make that happen, man,
and in my case,

I was backed by the smartest
and the most capable.

Give it up for Tracy,
Liz, and Jordan.

It's weird, the things
that you care about

the older you get, man,
in a straight collar,

and fucking hair was,
like, hid on the movie.

I never had to worry
about the performances.

I never had to worry about
how the movie played out

or how it looked
and stuff like that

because when you get
to this part in life,

like, we're all in the game.

We've been here
for a while, man.

If you can run on a show,
you're already a Jedi.

You're already super
fucking talented,

more so than most in the fucking
world and stuff like that,

so to collect this many Jedis
in one place and whatnot,

trying to make a show
is thrilling.

I didn't have to worry
about baseline things

because everyone took care
of their own jobs

and, like,
over-fucking-delivered.

Like, it's weird to be a dude
in a room

sitting there smoking weed
and being like,

"This would be cool,"

and you go from this thing
where you start by yourself,

and then slowly, it becomes this
group of people that believe,

a congregation, and you put up
a fucking cathedral,

and then you're done,
and you walk away,

and it lives there
for the rest of your lives,

and people walk by it
and talk about it,

and you go, "Hey, remember
when you built that?"

And you're like, "Yeah,
I'll never forget building

this fucking cathedral.
It's beautiful.

It's the best one I ever built."

That has everything to do with
everybody here, so thank you.

Let's finish this.

♪♪

So, after 21 very long,

packed days
of trying to make it,

trying to get everything done
in the 12, 13,

once 15 hours...

there's nothing left to shoot.

We're done.

It's a wrap on Louisiana.

It went too fucking fast.

And... I...

It was a different experience
than I thought I would have.

I thought
it would be fun and easy.

And...

Mm.

It was fun,

and, all things considered,
it was easy.

But I... I love this movie

because this
is where I found out

how much I still care
about the job, and...

that was nice to know.

Yeah, man, I learned a lot,

and it's weird to say,
25 years into the job.

I learned Mewes is a better
actor than I thought,

and I thought
he was pretty good.

I learned that, like,
people can still surprise you.

I learned sometimes it's as
simple as fucking reaching out.

I learned that I like working
with my kid, but I knew that.

I learned that I like playing
with my characters.

You know, again, I don't blame
anybody, but, like,

I'd done so many
of those movies,

and then people would be like,

"You do too many
of those movies.

Oh, it's another like
Kevin Smith movie,

where everything's
connected and shit."

And so after a while, you know,
I did it for 12 years,

and then I put it down,
and, God, did I miss it.

That's all I have in this world.

Those are mine.

Those characters are mine,

so it was awesome
to open up the box

and pull out all the toys

and set 'em up and play
with my kid and be like,

"This is what I used to do
before you were born.

This guy would go here,
and this girl would go here,

and they would say
this shit to each other,

and then,
these cats over here..."

It's fun. It's beautiful.

And now we got
the movie to show for it, man,

and it's, like, so weird to say,

because I wouldn't imagine
this going in,

but, seriously, one of the best
fucking flicks

I've ever made.

And the lesson in that is,
I leaned into me.

I just... I did me.

At one point, I was like,
"Oh, I shouldn't do me anymore.

I should do somebody else."

That's "Jersey Girl,"
"Zach and Miri Make a Porno."

Well, now I'm just gonna do me,

which sounds very masturbatory.

That is pretty much the case.

But... I'm doing me.

♪♪

♪♪

Again with two men and a dream.

One man and a dream.
He, for years, was like,

"We should do another
'Jay and Silent Bob' movie."

I'm like,
"No, we're lucky we did one,"

and then one day, I was like,

"The boy is right,"
so here we are.

You made a beautiful movie.
A beautiful movie.

Say something.

The movie is definitely
like he said.

Reading it on the pages,
I was like, "This is beautiful,"

but then seeing it,
'cause he's already cut stuff

and then working with Harley,
and like he said, I teared up.

I don't know. I'm super excited.

I wanted to pull him aside
and say thanks.

Again, I'm horrible
talking on the camera

when it comes to sharing
and baring my heart.

Should have played Silent Bob.

Again, I can talk
and tell funny stories,

but when it comes
to speaking my heart, it's hard.

But, again, I love Kevin,

and I'm so happy
we got to do this.

I'm like blown away we're done,

and I wanted to come and say,
"Everyone,

that is a fucking wrap on
'Jay and Silent Bob Reboot, '"

and I love this guy,
and I'm gonna hug him.

I'm gonna kiss him,
and you're gonna see it,

and Josh is gonna
slowly push out and edit.

But what the great thing is,

guys,
I don't mean to say this again,

but on the other side
of the camera,

Josh wouldn't be here
or have his fucking wife

if it also wasn't for
'Jay and Silent Bob'

or this guy. Thank you.

He ain't wrong.

Alright, guys. Thank you, man.

That's a wrap for
"Jay and Silent Bob Reboot."

I love you.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

And action camera.

Action, Matt.

Hi. Remember me?

I'm Loki, the angel of death,
from "Dogma."

Uh... well, I think
he's mellowed a little bit.

He used to just
give you line readings.

Like, he wrote
in a very particular voice.

Like, I would honor, like,

every comma
and exclamation point,

whereas Ben was a little more

fast and loose
with his dialogue.

And action.

G'day. I'm Chris Hemsworth,

and, uh, well,
I've been paid to welcome you

to the 10th Annual
Hollywood Chronic-Con.

I listen
to Kevin Smith's podcasts

when he reviews movies
to kind of steal what he says

and use them
in my own interviews

to sound a little bit
more intelligent

and educated
on the comic book world

and filmmaking in general.

Thanks, Kevin.