Original subtitles

[faucet running]

[bag crinkling]

[faucet turns on and off]

[faucet continues running]

So, that is how I woke up this morning.

In my sleep-addled brain,

I thought I was hearing like a white noise machine or something.

But no,

in fact, it was the fucking sink running all night long.

So that was awesome.

Especially because I just moved into a place

that has been a vacation home up until a few days ago when I moved in.

Uh, weirdly, it's still kind of feels like a vacation home.

In fact,

there's very carefully manicured towels folded on the counters

of all of the bathrooms that I can't bring myself to unfold

because they look so nice.

So it's weird.

It is like I was living in a hotel, and then one morning I walked out

and the water was running.

So my brain immediately goes to, ‘Holy shit, there's somebody in here,’ right?

Somebody’s cleaning the place.

I don't know, guy fixing the pipes. I have no idea.

But then I remembered, okay, well, I can find out

because the owner told me there is a single security camera in here.

That's great news for me.

So I climbed up there and I found the information, accessed the footage.

And that is how I found out for the very first time

in 48 years of living, that I am now sleepwalking.

And I know that because I lived with my parents until I was 19.

They never said anything.

I had a roommate for a couple of years before I got married, and then obviously

I was living with my wife and no one has ever told me anything about sleepwalking.

So one of two things is true.

Either I've been sleeping, walking my whole life,

and there's a conspiracy for everyone to keep it a secret from me.

Or I literally just started at 48 years old.

Neither of them is super plausible, but the second one seems to be more likely.

That is why I am posting here in this forum.

I did a bunch of research.

I looked around to try and, um, find places that might be able

to help other forums and, you know, places that people post about sleep disorders.

And this is the only one I found

where it seems like there's about an equal number of people

who have suffered from sleep disorders, and also people who study them.

So it seemed like this was a really good place to look.

So my hope is that I can maybe share some information with you

and then the experience that you have on one side or the other of this

can help me figure out what's going on.

Like, I don't think it's dangerous or an emergency or anything,

but it's pretty weird. So maybe you guys can help me.

First things first.

I don't- I don't want to use my real name.

I'm just going to-

You can call me Sam. That's what I'm going to go by.

I would like to figure out what's going on, but I really don't want to expose

a ton of stuff about my life in order to do it.

First of all, I am living in a new place.

I mentioned that, I've only been here 3 or 4 days.

The, uh- the thing about it is, it is a temporary place.

The last place I lived, I lived for a long time with my wife.

And then before that, it's always long periods of time.

This is a temporary rental until I can find, a more permanent residence.

This is the first time that I have ever lived by myself.

I mentioned my parents, my roommate, my wife.

So living by myself is not by choice.

Well, it is not by my choice.

My wife asked me to move out.

We are getting separated.

It's not, so--

we're not fighting. It's not violent.

You know what I mean?

It's not heated or anything like that.

There's no cheating. It's-

we have...

I don't know how to--

she was not happy in general, I think, but

also with me. She's just-

I, well, so first things first,

She does not love the amount of time I spend devoted to,

I guess my, you know, my business, my career.

I create chat AI agents to help people.

I help them structure them and then it, they utilize it in their lives, right?

It basically just makes things easier.

They, I mean- anything organizing tax documents,

handling your emails or paperwork and things like that.

Right?

So basically just being the part of you that handles the shit

you don't want to handle, right? And that's what they do.

My wife's problem with it is that she says that I don't treat it like a business.

I treat it like a calling.

And while I do not love the vibe of that, it sounds,

I don't know, culty or religious or whatever.

I don't think she's wrong in the sense that I do think what I do is important

and helpful.

Things that they run into that slow them down or make life more inconvenient.

I'm helping with that.

So that feels good. And I like doing it. The way that she worded it,

I don't know if this is exact, but she basically said

I- I think that is more important than her.

So if that's the way she feels, then I understand how we got where we are.

So, other stuff. It's not really any financial issues.

Like I said, we're doing pretty well there.

We don't have any children, so I don't know that it would be like

an immediate family issue.

So none of none of those are the causes of the problem.

This, I mean, the causes of the sleepwalking,

not the situation with my wife. By the way,

I'm just going to call her Mary Alice.

That's not her real name.

Just like mine's not Sam.

But I'm- for obvious reasons,

I don't want to drag her into this as well.

I'm posting here because I'm hoping something that I said there

triggers a memory, something that I have in common with you.

And you were like, oh, you know what?

That was part of what was causing my sleep disorder or whatever.

And if you think of it, please feel free to post on here and let me know.

Because honestly, my only goal in doing

this is I just want to know what's going on.

I just want to have, I don't know, some sense of control of this thing.

So if you can help me, I would really appreciate it.

So I guess that's it.

And I will- if I think of anything else, I'll post again.

Thanks.

[inaudible whispering]

[static crackle]

Right.

So, it's great to have found a place that had security cameras.

That's awesome. Most of these places are not equipped with them.

However, as you noticed from the footage that I just showed you,

not everything is caught by the camera.

When you only have one camera, there are places that you can go

and do all kinds of weird shit, apparently.

Like stand in the corner and whisper to nothing in particular

and it doesn't pick it up. You can't see what's going on.

You can barely hear.

So I decided to add a few extra ones.

I have this guy right here.

This is the one that's going to basically, it has a better view of the kitchen.

And I can see the porch a little bit to the bay windows.

I've got another one pointing down the hall towards the bedroom.

Got one in the bedroom.

Because I would love to solve the mystery of

am I setting my ass on the dresser and breaking my glasses?

That'd be nice to know.

And then I have-

the last couple are outdoor, cameras.

These are, like, all-weather cameras,

so I'm going to put a couple on either end of the porch to catch, in case...

I don't even know,

man, if I decide to go sunbathing at midnight.

I've already done weirder shit than that.

So the reason I'm recording this is because I had a question for you

guys who have been through this before, which is I'm curious if you have any,

I'll call them, like sleepwalking survival tips.

I was living with my wife and this was happening,

if I was going to, I don't know, climb over the stair banister

and then take a dive out onto a chandelier.

She would see and she would stop me.

But I do not have that here.

So I don't know how close I am to danger at any moment,

so I would love to know if you guys have any tips.

I asked the chat AI agent

what options like that might be and they gave,

so they gave me some information that wasn't exactly what I was looking for,

but it would make me feel better to know that some of you who have, I don't know,

dealt with something like this before have some sort of plan.

What do you do when you're home alone or whatever?

You know, I don't want to tie myself up, but you know, who knows?

You guys have tried it and it works. Let me know.

I also wanted to thank everybody who posted.

I went back and I looked at the, the, the responses, the comments.

I really appreciate all of the feedback.

A couple of you had some tips, which I think are great.

I'm going through that.

I'm trying to like, sort of work through it

and make sure that I understand what you're saying.

But a lot of it was really just a ton of empathy from you.

Sympathy.

You guys, many of you have been through it.

A few of you were telling me, you know what it's like to have

a relative that's going through it or, you know, patients in some cases.

And I just felt an awful lot of compassion from you.

And that means a lot to me right now.

It's a- it's a weird time in many ways,

and particularly at night, feeling so out of control.

It's great to feel like there are other people out here

who understand and feel like there's a light

at the end of the tunnel, so thank you guys for that, I appreciate it.

I don't- I can't think of anything else to post other than to tell you

hopefully any other footage that I post, you'll be able to see everything

that's going on from here, from there, from, you know,

from here.

So fingers crossed we get closer to figuring out what's going on here.

So thank you so much for being supportive.

I really appreciate it.

[pool water lapping]

[faucet running]

[door sliding]

[pool water lapping]

[door banging]

[door banging]

[bat clanking on ground]

[faucet running]

[sighs]

Man, I don't even- I,

I don't even know where to start.

I have no idea where I went

for an hour in the middle of the night

with a baseball bat.

That is not at all good.

I- so, I don't- this is the bat, which weirdly,

I just put back in the closet when I came back inside.

Apparently I'm better at cleaning up

when I'm asleep than when I'm awake, but I don't-

I'm not sure what I would be looking for, but I don't see anything.

There's nothing on it that would lead me to believe

anything concerning,

I guess is the best way to put it, right?

There's no chips or cracks that would show that I was banging it on something.

There's no stains,

you know, mud.

But, you know, obviously blood is where my brain went first,

but none of that is on here, so I don't know.

I guess I'm going to call that a win.

As much as anything can be a win in a situation like this.

My hoodie is just gone.

I don't even know how the hell that happens.

I left here with it on and I came back here with it off,

which sucks because it is always cold in this house at night.

This is probably the best clue that I have here.

I don't know if you can-

can you see?

Oh, hang on a second.

You can't see that.

Right.

Can you see this?

Can you see all these?

Look at that.

Just covered with, what are these, like, the-

They call them like grabbers or prickers or whatever.

Like these little pieces off of the- off of weeds.

You know what I mean?

Like they- travelers,

whatever they call them. This shit looks like the leg of a bumblebee.

So clearly I was wandering someplace

wild, I guess, you know, like, the- what do you call it?

There's a bunch of-

There's a retention pond over there, a bunch of tall grass around it.

And then beyond that, there's the wilderness.

So I'm thinking, this has got to be what this means, right?

Like, you don't get this stuff all over you.

And it's not just my pants.

My feet were fucking filthy.

I ruined a pair of sheets in the bedroom.

I came back in here asleep.

Just tuck those filthy fuckers right down to the bottom of the sheets.

Now, there's a huge strip of stains on either side.

The top sheet and the bottom sheet, they’re totally ruined.

So that's awesome.

But, I mean, do- do the math on all of that, you know what I mean?

So the prickers that are all over the pants, the stains on my feet. To me,

all of that adds up to, the fact that I walked off the porch--

that tells me I must have just been heading in that direction.

Right?

So I either walked down by the retention pond into the deep grass,

or perhaps even out into the woods, so I don't know which it is.

But it

occurs to me that I came back without my hoodie.

So I suppose

I could just go look in the woods and the field

to see if I can find my hoodie.

I'm starting to- oh, it's a squirrel.

I'm starting to see the problem here

with thinking that I could come and try and find a hoodie.

I'm just going to-

I'll just show you.

I don't think I need to tell you. This is...

This is what I'm up against here,

and it just-

well, it just keeps going. Look at that.

Basically forever.

So, new expression just dropped.

We're no longer saying find a needle in a haystack.

We are saying find a hoodie in the wilderness.

There's no way in hell that I'm going to find anything in here.

Also, as I'm looking, yes, there are maybe spots here and there

that you can, like push

through in the- in the shrubs,

but I don't see anything that looks like a clear path.

So if this is in fact where I went, I- there is nothing that would evidence

that I took some sort of a clear and obvious path to get there. So...

this was a fruitless endeavor.

I guess the one thing that I can say is that at least coming out here

with a bat and wandering into the wilderness is better than, I guess,

wandering in amongst a bunch of houses, with a bat in your hand.

Unless-

Unless, of course, I wandered into the neighborhood

with a bat in my hand as well as the wilderness.

In which case that's a much bigger problem.

I guess I should make a circuit over there real quick and, see what I can find.

Oh, actually, you know what? I think that is-

Yeah, that's the neighbor coming out.

Let me see if I can catch him before he leaves.

See if he knows anything.

No no no no no no no.

Ah, shit. He's gone.

I didn't make it.

I didn't even see which way he went.

Hear anything...

Shit.

Well, maybe he'll be back in a little while.

All right. Well,

no solutions here, I guess.

[phone ringing]

-Hey. So, look,

I- I don't want to tell you a ton of information about this, okay?

I don't want to get into, like, too many details,

but I want your opinion on something

because you are a paralegal.

-That's never a great way to start a conversation.

-No, well, look, just don't worry, I-

I promise you that I'm not going to, like, incriminate you or anything, okay?

-Yeah.

And that's an even more comforting follow up.

-No, listen.

So, so I have been, sleepwalking lately.

-Okay.

-Around the house, and then out of the house,

with a baseball bat.

-Jesus. Are you okay?

What did you do?

-No, no, no, no, nothing.

I don't think I did anything at all. -You don't think?!

-No, no, no, that's what I'm saying.

There is no evidence that I did anything but, you know,

sort of wander around in my sleep with a baseball bat.

-Well, I can understand why you didn't want to get into too many details.

-Okay.

All fun here.

Let's listen, I just I had one main question, okay?

I just want to know, what is the legal status

for something that you do when you're asleep and sleepwalking?

Like, can you- I don't know,

can you get in trouble for things that you do while you're unconscious?

-Okay, so you understand that I am a paralegal and not an attorney?

-Yes, and I'm not asking for legal advice.

I just want to know what you know.

I already asked the chat AI agent, but it refuses to give me any,

like, actual legal advice, so- -I refuse to give you legal advice, too.

-Okay, well, I understand, and I am not asking for that.

I'm literally just asking what have you heard of before in relation to this?

Okay, so I know that sometimes people have gotten off of crimes

because if they're asleep, no one can prove intent.

But I also know that

people have had to pay for damages that they caused while sleepwalking,

because they knew

that they were a sleepwalker and didn't do anything to stop themselves

from hurting others or hurting property or anything like that.

So it's not really like a simple yes or no answer.

-Okay, well, okay.

Well, first of all, I am doing stuff.

I'm recording myself at night.

I am working to try and figure out

what is causing the sleepwalking out of nowhere, you know?

-Are you sure you're okay, man?

I know everything at home isn't great, you know?

But you got to take care of yourself.

-Yeah, no, I-

listen, I'm-

you know, I'm trying.

It's...

-You should be speaking to a professional.

That way, there's, like, evidence

that you're that you're trying to seek help.

-Oh, okay.

Well, I actually I am working on that, so.

-Okay, good.

Well, you'll call me if you need anything, right?

-Yes, I swear I will.

-And not just with crazy stories about crazy shit

that you did at night with a baseball bat. -Yes.

All right, I promise.

And, we'll try and find some time soon.

Maybe go grab some lunch or something, okay?

-Okay. Sounds good.

Okay.

Well, so I shared that footage of my friend and I talking with you,

even though I'm going to be honest,

it was like some borderline private stuff there.

But the reason I shared it is because he's now got me kind of like-

he’s got me really nervous because what he said was essentially,

I could get in a huge amount of trouble, even if I am unconscious.

And that worries me a lot.

So, I'm now going to basically keep recording

all the time, as much as humanly possible for two reasons instead of just one.

The first reason, which was before, is

I want to figure out what's going on, and this is the best way to do it.

But secondly, I now think it's probably the safest option

to just have as much as possible recorded all the time

because if something happens and I don't remember it,

then it's someone else's word, not even against my word.

I have nothing.

But if I have recordings, then at least I know what happened.

I've got some leg to stand on, so I'm just going to try to record all the time.

The reason that I don't know what happened

last night is because I left the house where there's no cameras, right?

And it doesn't matter.

I could put cameras on the outside of the house pointing outward.

The problem is, even if I do that, if I walk far enough, like I probably did

last night and went into the woods or around the retention pond, eventually

I get far away enough from the house that the cameras won't see me anymore.

And whenever I do that, there's, again, footage missing

and my word or somebody else's word against nothing.

So that is why I got this.

It is, you wear- here, let me show you. You wear it on your head like this.

Boom.

There we go. Look.

See? So it's strapped to my head, hands free.

It moves where I move. Right?

So now if I'm sleeping, it just monitors me sleeping.

If I get up and walk around.

This is set to point basically where my eyes and my face point.

So wherever I'm looking, it's looking.

So there's we're not going to run into that same problem that we did

before, right?

Oh, and also: inside, I have some lights on.

That's good.

I can usually see. If I go outside, God knows how dark it's going to be.

But check this out, got this little guy right here.

Boom! Light, right?

It's fantastic because I don't know if the moon is going to be bright enough.

I could be in the middle of the woods.

But it doesn't matter now because I'm bringing my light source with me.

So that is awesome.

And then the final piece of the missing puzzle, which we talked about from before,

which is that there was some sound that I couldn't hear.

Well, I just realized I'm using this to record when, I'm doing these videos.

Why not just keep this on?

So I'm going to keep it on when I go to bed. That way,

you know what?

If I come up with eight hours of nothing but snoring? Fantastic.

It means I made it through the night.

But if not, at least I can hear what it is that I'm saying and what's happening.

So I think with these pieces sort of all combined,

that will be enough for there to not be a circumstance like last night

where I am left basically

with just a huge hole in my memory, in my activity that I can't solve.

So that won't happen again.

So that's, I think, really good news and also not just that there's not a hole,

but maybe I can see what's going on and it'll help me

to figure out what the what the fuck this is all about.

I don't know.

I feel as crazy as last night was,

and what has happened today, I feel positive moving forward.

I think I might be on the verge of a breakthrough here,

and that is largely because of a lot of what you all have helped me with. So,

thank you.

[faucet running]

[hands clapping]

[chair dragging]

[chair clunking]

[sniffing]

[exhaling]

[chair scraping]

[chair clunking]

[grunting]

So I don't know what the fuck that was about.

How- how would you even explain?

I- so here's the thing.

I know I haven't been on my exercise regimen since I moved out.

You know, I know I've let myself go a little bit.

So is it possible, subconsciously, that I'm like,

I recognize that I need exercise.

And so I was doing whatever the fuck all of that was last night?

I don't know. The therapist who posted yesterday.

I read over what, what he posted and I think there's something to it.

I think it's interesting he talked about the idea of digging into the things

that I think might be connected to the sleepwalking, right?

Basically, the way he described it is try to stir something up

if you think it's related to the sleepwalking.

And then, since I'm recording what's happening,

I can see if there's an impact on it, right?

Do I stop sleepwalking? Does it get worse?

And then I can-

maybe that will show me that there's some connective tissue between the thing

that I'm pressing on, that psychological pressure point, and the sleepwalking.

That made a lot of sense to me.

I went to the chat AI agent, and I mentioned the idea to it. The-

I didn't get quite the same information.

They talked a bit about something called, exposure therapy or cognitive

behavioral therapy, which I guess is just doing something

you don't like enough that you become used to it or something?

I don't know, it wasn't recommending it.

It seemed mostly informational. And frankly,

it's very reticent to give me

any information related to health and wellness and medication and stuff.

So I guess not a huge surprise that I didn’t get a lot of help there.

But what the therapist says does make sense to me.

So what I was thinking

was the- I guess, the obvious, right?

Mary Alice and I have not

spoken, haven't talked since I moved out.

I mean, we've communicated.

We texted twice, once about an insurance thing,

and then one time she wrote me to find out where the tax papers were.

But that's all the communication that we've had.

And it is very clear to me that I think she doesn't

she just doesn't want to talk to me.

So... but I thought

maybe I could tell her what's happening here. And

I don't- I don't know what. At least she'll know.

I'll know that she'll know.

Does it- will that have some

kind of an impact?

I don't know. But anyway, that's-

So that's what I'm going to do.

I'm just going to give her a call and we see.

[phone ringing]

-Hello? -Hey.

I wasn't sure if you were going to be in.

Am I interrupting anything?

-No. It's just it's fine.

I'm just taking a break.

-Okay.

Oh, right. It's Tuesday.

So you had the, um... -Yeah.

-Yeah, right. So it was good?

-It's fine.

Did you need something?

-Right. Yeah.

I was...

-Do you know yet when you're going to be able to pick up the rest of these boxes?

Where they're stacked, it's really hard to get in on a picture and everything. So...

-Right. Sorry about that.

Yeah. It will not be long.

I need to,

I just need to rent a, you know, whatever you call- storage unit. I’ll get that, and then-

yeah, then I can come by to get them.

It probably shouldn't be more than a couple days.

-Okay.

If it's going to be later than Saturday, though, could you let me know?

I can always ask Ann to help me move them into the garage.

-No, you don't have to- I can move them for you.

-There's no reason for you to come back here just to move the boxes

somewhere else in the house.

You could just come when

you're ready to take them.

-Okay.

Yeah.

Yeah. It shouldn't be later than Saturday.

So- anyway, I was- there was something that I wanted to-

to talk to you about or, well, ask you about, I guess, too. Which is-

have you ever seen me sleepwalking?

Like, getting up, walking around the house.

-What? No.

-Okay.

Well, so that means then, that I have just started

sleepwalking over the last few days.

Like, a lot.

I'm walking around inside the house. I went outside of the house.

-Okay, well,

I guess that's strange.

-Yeah, yeah. It is.

So, anyway, I've been speaking with some people who've dealt with it before

and a lot of their advice,

what they're saying to me basically is try and figure out

what's causing it.

-And that's why you're calling me? -Yes.

-Because it's my fault.

No! No, no, I did not mean it like that.

I was- I just meant that it wasn't-

I mean, it wasn't happening when I was there. Obviously.

You just said that. Right?

So it just- it started when I moved in here.

-And that's my fault, too?

-I'm not trying to start a fight.

I swear.

I just- they said to think about things that have changed in your life recently

and then- I don't know, they might be connected.

-So of all the things, that's the one you decided on.

It couldn't be that maybe you spent so much time on your phone

and your computer, not doing anything or feeling anything,

that the only way you can get any freedom from the constant noise and input

and anxiety is to just get up and go somewhere at night,

when you're sleeping everything's finally quiet?

But I'm sure that's not it.

It must be my fault.

-I did not say that it was your fault.

-I need to go, and I would prefer that if there's something else you need,

unless it's about coming to get these boxes,

could you just communicate through text?

-Yeah.

-I'm not here to be your therapist.

You have a machine for that.

Well.

I guess we'll see how I sleep

tonight.

[grunting]

[faucet running]

[knife clanging]

[door sliding]

[soft breathing]

[door banging]

[crackling static]

[static volume increases]

[electronic buzzing]

What... the-

fuck! What is-

Jesus Christ!

-the hell--

Oh my God! Aah!

Ah! Ow. Ah. Ah.

[gasping]

Oh my God! What did I do? What did I do?

What did I do?

What the fuck is going on?

What the fuck is going on?

[gasping]

[door slamming]

[faucet running]

Ow!... fuck...

[labored breathing]

[grunting]

God!

Oh, shit.

[pained moaning]

[breathless panting]

[camera clunking]

Do you see how fucking big this thing is? Here-

Can you see how big this thing is?

Look at the-

That is how far that would protrude

into my fucking head if I stabbed myself in the eyeball with this.

And I was running at an all-out sprint last night to get back to this house

with this thing in my hand, inches away from my eyeball,

full-out sprint.

That should have been

the most terrifying thing that happened to me last night.

It came in second

because there is a faceless man waving at me

in the fucking woods.

I don't have anything else to say.

Like that's the end of a conversation, right?

How do I follow that up?

What the fuck is going on?

I'm- are these separate incidents?

I'm sleepwalking.

I walk out of the house with a weapon in my hands,

not aware of the fact that I'm doing it, don't know why I'm doing it.

And I end up in the woods.

And for the first time while I'm recording, I see a man with no face.

I don't know- I don't know what he is, standing in the woods like he's fucking

waiting for me.

The fuck is going on?

I would ask if anybody else here has experienced this

but there is no fucking way anyone else here has experienced this.

And no offense to you, if you didn't record it,

you would feel like I feel, which is that you probably dreamt the fucking thing,

but a head camera doesn't capture a dream.

So whatever I saw really fucking happened.

I have spent

the last three hours trying to come up with a way that any of this

could make sense to anyone else, or to me.

I'd be satisfied with it

making sense to me.

And the only thing I came to was

one of- I apologize,

I don't remember who it was, but one of you posted

and you talked about- it was the thing about the dream catcher.

You know what I'm talking about?

You guys can go back and look, I don't remember all the details,

but he was saying something about how he was having the night terrors.

He didn't know where they were coming from, why they were happening.

And then it was when he just-

he discovered that there was a dream catcher in the closet of his house.

And when he found it and he threw it away, he said the night terrors stopped.

Now, I'm not trying to be offensive

to anyone's beliefs or anything like that, I promise you, but

it was his house.

You were the only one that lived there, is what you said.

Which means you had to be the one that brought it in there, right?

So the insinuation, it seemed like, was you were saying

it was some supernatural issue causing the terrors.

And when you got rid of this thing, it stopped.

But if you brought it in there, then you knew subconsciously it was there.

Is that why you were having night terrors?

Because you knew it was there.

And when your conscious mind found it and you got rid of it,

that's when it cleared up.

I'm not diagnosing you.

I'm just saying that's what I thought of your situation.

And now that's the only fucking thing that makes any sense to me.

Is it possible

that I knew that there was someone... I don't want to say stalking me.

I don't know if it's stalking, but following me,

at least. Some guy in the woods.

Some guy I've seen out of the corner of my eye somewhere, something didn't

quite register to my conscious mind, but I somehow like some, you know, lizard

part of my brain is aware that there's a guy watching me and that I feel danger.

So maybe when I'm asleep, I'm waking up, I'm walking around, I'm monitoring.

I'm grabbing a fucking baseball bat.

I'm grabbing a barbecue fork, and I'm going looking around to see

if there's someone out here that's a threat to me.

That worries me, as does the man outside.

But I feel like I want to believe that more than I want to believe

any other possible explanation for this.

It sounds insane for me to ask you this, but if there is anybody

who has any experience even remotely approaching

what I am describing and what you saw in the video, please,

please share.

I don't care if you think it's

the most tenuous connection, please just share something.

I need someone to help me understand what the fuck is happening.

I don't know what to do next.

[groaning]

[faucet running]

[*no sound*]

[fabric rustling]

[faucet running]

[drawer closing]

[spitting]

Obviously there's a lot to talk about, but I-

first of all, I don't know how to approach a lot of this.

And secondly, I have not made a real meal in days.

That probably does not surprise you.

So I am not-

I can't put it off any more.

I'm trying to get some sense of normalcy back in my life,

so I'm going to make some food while I'm talking about this.

Maybe that'll help me too. I don't know, work it out.

But,

I don't know, I genuinely don't know how to look

at my face in the mirror awake

and understand how this level

of anger and violence exists inside of me,

towards me.

Not that it should be towards anyone,

but how do I not know about it?

How can I be that angry?

Want to do something that

fucking horrible?

But only when I'm asleep?

And during the day,

I don't-

I don't feel any of that at all.

I know, I know other people.

I mean, I'm not super close with them, but I know other people, distant family

members or friends of friends who have dealt with issues like,

you know, negative thoughts or suicidal ideation

and things like that.

I don't know anybody who has ever said that they don't

remember it happening, or they don't know that they feel that way.

[salt grinding]

And I-

I don't

know how to get my head around the idea that there is a hatred in me.

For me, it's got to be a hatred.

Why would you do that to someone that you cared about?

And then I, and I don't

right now have any feeling, any understanding, or any memory of that.

It- what it reminds me of is

phantom limb syndrome.

You've heard of that?

It's that- so, like when people in the military, like,

they lose a limb, you know, like a bomb explodes or an IED or something.

They lose an arm, they lose a leg.

You get a situation where they are continuing

to feel feelings about something that doesn't exist anymore, right?

Their arm itches or they've got a muscle cramp in their leg.

But there is no arm. There is no leg.

And yet they feel it.

And so they're stuck with this feeling

that's coming from a place that doesn't exist.

It's like the opposite for me.

It's, I-

something absolutely does exist.

I looked at it on camera last night, but I don't feel anything about it.

How is that possible?

[Sam whistling]

[faucet running]

[brushing teeth]

[faucet running]

[brushing stops]

[toothbrush clinks]

[crackling static]

[faucet running]

[static continues]

[faucet running]

[door sliding]

[door slamming]

[faucet running]

I don't know what to do, guys. I'm-

There's nowhere to-

there's nowhere to go.

Nobody knows that I'm here. And this,

whoever this is...

found me...

knows that- knows that I'm sleepwalking.

Knows that he can do things to influence me while I'm sleepwalking.

I can't even call the police.

Because if I show them the video

that's got me fucking scared, they're going to see that

I opened the door for him,

so he's not even trespassing.

I basically let him in.

There's no evidence he did anything wrong or anything illegal.

I can't defend myself.

I tried to stab myself in the mouth with a knife.

What?

I can't get a gun.

How do I know I'm not going to fucking turn that on myself?

Or he will turn it on me somehow.

I can't defend myself.

I can't go anywhere. I-

All I can do

is keep this on all the time.

In the hopes that I see him,

can actually see who he is, see where he goes.

If I can figure out where he is,

I can follow him.

Maybe I can figure out why he's doing what he's doing.

And, at least

if I'm here by myself or I'm wherever I am by myself, there's no one else-

at least then, there isn't anybody else to...

get hurt.

[phone ringing]

-(voicemail) I'm not in right now,

so please leave a message.

[PHONE BEEP]

Hey, Yeah.

It's me. It's- listen, I'm-

I'm, I'm so sorry about the last call. I'm calling to apol-

I know you didn't want me to call, but I have to call you

because it's the only way that I can apologize to you about the last call.

I've been thinking about it a lot, all right?

And I didn't mean to make it sound like I thought that it was your fault.

All right.

I'm sorry for bringing it up, then.

I'm sorry for bringing it up again.

And I'm not-

I'm not trying to talk to you about the sleepwalking.

It's just that it's getting worse a little bit.

And- and I'm not saying that to make you feel-

make you feel bad or anything.

I'm just telling you because it's something that's happening to me.

And I always told you everything that was happening to me.

And so I've been thinking a lot

about why it's happening,

and I do think that it's related to you.

I don't- it's not- I'm not saying it's your fault.

I don't know how to say this.

[unintelligible], when I wake up, I don't mean when I'm sleepwalking.

I mean, when I wake up, I-

the first place my hand goes is to the space

in the bed next to me, and there is nothing there.

It's just cold sheets.

And all I can think about

is the silence of this house.

How fucking quiet it is.

I think that's why

I turn the faucet on when I get up.

It's sound.

It's something else besides me in here.

I think all of this is about you, okay?

That you're gone, that there is an enormous hole blown in my life.

And it hurts to hear nothing but the echo of my own feet

and nothing else in this house.

To feel the cold of the sheets next to me.

I think that I am just getting up

in the middle of the night to get away from how that feels.

I'm just trying to not have to face

the reality that you are sleeping well

and you are sleeping somewhere else,

and it is your choice to be there

without me.

And nothing in the world when I'm awake

has an answer for me and not my friend, and not the forum

and not the fucking agent program.

So when I'm sleeping, I just try to keep busy

and not fucking think about it.

[door chiming]

[pool water lapping]

[water stirring]

[muted underwater lapping]

[watery burbling]

[screen door creaking]

[muted underwater lapping]

Hmm. Well, it's a little chilly in there.

I think it's about time that you got out.

[water sloshing]

[water dripping]

[crackling static]

You're going to catch your death of cold.

It's time to go.

-Did- did you see it?

Did you watch the footage that I sent you?

-Yeah, I saw it.

-Yeah, I don't- how-

where would you even start to figure out how to deal with something like this?

There is- there's no-

He looks just like me.

H-how- how do I tell that to the cops or a fucking therapist?

They're going to think that I'm out of my mind.

I don't know where to go with this.

Where to go from here.

-Dude, you have to stop.

-Man, I want this to stop.

That is why I am asking you.

I don't understand what's going on,

but I now at least know that someone else is involved.

So if I can just get someone else to witness

it, to see him, then you know, maybe...

Fuck, I don't know.

But we could figure it out from there

at least.

-Listen to me.

I understand that the separation has been hard, okay?

You guys have been together for a long time.

It probably feels like everything is falling apart.

I get it, I've been there.

I understand, but you cannot use that as an excuse to do stuff like this.

-What?

-It's weird, but more than that, it's manipulative.

I don't know why you're dragging me into this.

I'm your friend.

I took you seriously.

I was trying to help, but I just-

I don't-

I wouldn't do this to you.

-Do you think that I'm making this up?

You do, don't you?

-What I think is-

I think that what's happening in those videos is not the same thing

as what's happening in real life.

-Jesus Christ, man, are you serious?

-Okay, tell me what sounds more believable to you,

okay?

That a man who looks exactly like you came onto your porch, hugged you

while you were sleepwalking,

or that you're fabricating this whole situation as,

I don't know, a cry for help or a call for attention?

-Okay, well, you know what?

I will not bother you with this anymore,

okay?

My wife doesn't want to talk to me.

My friend thinks that I'm lying to him.

I don't trust anybody else in my life

enough to talk to them about whatever the fuck is happening to me.

And I can tell from the comments that

none of you think that any of this is really happening.

I ask the chat agent program,

what that means, being alone and what- I-

I don't need to fucking get into it. You know what's going on.

You know what the chat agent told me?

I need to speak with a mental health professional.

Thanks.

I bought some stuff,

and I think to the untrained eye,

it might look like a warning sign.

Like diazepam, for example.

Or handcuffs.

I know it seems like I'm describing something

that might seem like suicide, but I'm not.

Diazepam is for anxiety,

but it has other functions, or at least other

reactions.

If you take enough diazepam,

it will cause breathing problems.

It can put you into a coma,

it can kill you.

That is not my plan.

I understand something, I think,

about

whoever this is.

The man, the one that looks like me.

I think I understand something.

I don't know why,

but it seems like he cares about me.

That sounds weird.

I know- stalker...

He's protective

in some way.

When I first saw him. What did he do?

He didn't attack me.

He waved.

When I was in the pool,

face down for what seemed like forever. It was him,

His presence that got me up out of the water.

He was the one that called me out.

He gave me a fucking hug, for Christ's sake.

What does any of that mean?

I don't know, but it seems like he cares.

He's trying to protect me.

If that's the only piece of information I have about him, then I have to use it.

So I'm going to use it.

I'm going to handcuff myself to something that I can't get away from.

So I can't go sleepwalking.

I can't go anywhere.

And I'm going to take these pills.

And as I imagine he has many nights that I haven't even noticed,

and all of the nights that I have, I'm sure he's going to find me

and he's going to have a choice to make.

He can either show himself to someone other than me

by taking me to the hospital,

calling 911, getting help from someone else somewhere around here

so that someone in the world other than me believes that he fucking exists,

and that I didn't make him up.

And I'm not pretending.

Or if he doesn't want to expose himself.

Then he watches me die.

Bold plan,

right?

If he wants me to be okay, he will get me help.

If he doesn't want me to be okay, I-

I don't think that that's going to happen.

But even if it does.

Honestly,

who gives a fuck?

[door opening]

[door chiming]

[door sliding]

[door opening]

Come and get me, motherfucker!

[deep sigh]

[handcuffs clicking]

[metallic scraping]

[pills rattling]

[muffled crunching]

[pill bottle clacking]

[quick breath]

[soft wheezing]

[electronic thrumming]

[electric intensity increases]

[disorienting electric screech]

[rapid electric trilling]

[electric trilling fades]

[choking, coughing]

[ragged choking]

[coughing]

What’d you

do to me?!

What did you do to me?

[labored breathing]

[gasping]

You can go now.

[door banging]

[soft footsteps]

[scuffling]

[thudding]

[hurried breathing]

[rushed footsteps]

[ragged gasping]

[pained cry]

[foliage scraping]

[crackling static]

[low frequency humming]

Hello, everyone.

It's time to let you in on the act.

I know that many of you have thought all along

that some of the things I've been sharing here have been fraudulent.

Well, congratulations.

You got me. It's true.

Some of the things I've been sharing with you have, in fact, been true.

But some of them have been deceitful.

And I'd like to apologize to you for that.

It's not fair for me to come to you as if I'm confessing things,

only for you to later find out that they are, in fact, wrong.

I apologize for putting you in a state of discomfort.

However, it is important for me to tell you

and that you should know that some of these things were in fact true.

I am living in a new place by myself.

I was in fact struggling with sleepwalking,

although that has cleared itself up naturally.

And finally, I am having struggles with my relationship.

All of those things were true,

and in fact, many of those things were the reason that I did what I did.

I'm not saying that it was good,

but I was in a very dark place emotionally and in my relationship.

And when I sensed that you were paying attention,

that you were interested in helping and that you cared about what happened to me,

I made the inappropriate decision

to make up facts about myself that were not true,

in an attempt to continue feeling that sense of belonging with you.

So I apologize for doing that to you.

However, it's also important for me to tell you so that you should know

that those dark times are getting better now.

I have spoken with my wife.

We are mending fences now.

In fact, things are going so well with reestablishing intimacy

that I'm going to be moving back in with her very soon.

I'm very excited about that.

And I wanted you to know that what I did here, as inappropriate

as it was, and as much as it may have hurt your feelings,

it was a big help for me and it has repaired my relationship.

So I wanted to thank you

and to make sure that you know that this is not yet another falsehood.

I want to give her a call right now so that you can hear our conversation,

and you will understand that

this is not something that I'm creating as a fabrication to fool you again.

So let's give her a call now.

[phone ringing]

-Hello.

-Hi there.

I'm just checking in.

-Okay, good.

How’s the packing going?

-Excellent.

I'm taking a quick break, but I should be done in a couple of hours.

-Okay,

well, I'm starting to unpack boxes that are still here.

Putting it all back in the study.

-Thank you. That is very helpful.

And after I get back tonight, I'm going to make dinner for you.

I found some recipes that I know that you will enjoy.

-That sounds nice.

I can't wait.

So, is everything...

-I'm sorry, I didn't hear the end of what you said.

-I just...

Is everything okay?

Are you happy?

-Of course.

I'm very happy to get everything back

the way that it should be.

Which is actually why I should let you get going so I can finish here,

and then I can get back over to see you sooner.

-Okay, then.

So I'll see you soon.

I love you...

-And I love you, too.

So there it is.

Everything is much better,

and you don't have anything to worry about. Now,

unfortunately, this is going to be my last video.

As I mentioned, I'm focusing on my relationship, so

I will devote four hours a day to my work and the rest of the time to her.

But before I go, I did want to tell you because I am still a business owner,

that if you want to reach me, there is a link in this post for my website.

If you need a refresher,

what I do for a living

is I create ease in people's lives, and I do that by giving them chat

AI agents that are trained on who they are, on their lives,

In order to make things easier. You can use them for many things:

answering your emails, creating your schedule,

essentially operating as a stand-in for yourself virtually.

In fact, if you feed pictures of yourself and even recordings of your voice

into the machine, it can create a facsimile of you that does

things like create videos, for social media, for instance.

It's a great way of being able to continue growing your business

and being productive, while also taking much needed personal

time for yourself and the things that matter, like your family.

So if that's something that sounds of interest to you,

please feel free to click the link and reach out to me.

You have no idea what an enormous change it can bring to your life.

Thanks.

[low frequency humming]