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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:49,968 --> 00:00:53,125 Hello, Alexander. It's Stuart. 2 00:00:53,821 --> 00:00:54,488 Hello, Stuart. 3 00:00:55,176 --> 00:01:01,723 You know, admitting I've had lots to drink and that, but I can't help reflect� 4 00:01:01,724 --> 00:01:04,300 I'm Alexander, the bloke in the glasses driving, 5 00:01:04,602 --> 00:01:07,063 not the mumbly one on the tape. That's Stuart. 6 00:01:10,348 --> 00:01:15,196 I got to know Stuart in 2000 and decided to write his biography. 7 00:01:16,343 --> 00:01:19,157 All my friends said it was mad. I mean, after all this man was unknown, 8 00:01:19,158 --> 00:01:22,506 he wasn't famous, not a celebrity, but the book turned out okay. 9 00:01:25,764 --> 00:01:28,647 Just wish Stuart could have been here to see it. 10 00:01:38,136 --> 00:01:41,316 I think it was the first ever biography of a homeless man. 11 00:01:41,889 --> 00:01:43,339 From birth to the present day. 12 00:02:50,708 --> 00:02:54,931 So, back in 2000 I was earning a bit of extra pocket money 13 00:02:54,983 --> 00:02:57,277 working as a fundraiser at Wintercomfort, 14 00:02:58,841 --> 00:03:03,742 which is a busy little day shelter in Cambridge, normally full of homeless people. 15 00:03:05,306 --> 00:03:09,790 Full, that is, until the morning that the police decided to raid the place. 16 00:03:09,894 --> 00:03:10,937 They've been arrested. 17 00:03:11,385 --> 00:03:13,335 All of them? 18 00:03:13,700 --> 00:03:14,899 What a good idea. 19 00:03:19,070 --> 00:03:22,302 Uh, no, no. It was, um, just my boss, Ruth, 20 00:03:22,355 --> 00:03:24,388 and um, her deputy, John. 21 00:03:25,034 --> 00:03:28,246 Some of the clients have been secretly dealing drugs on the premises 22 00:03:28,248 --> 00:03:31,244 but because Ruth and John ran the charity, they were held responsible. 23 00:03:32,000 --> 00:03:34,867 They've got evidence, on film. 24 00:03:36,379 --> 00:03:38,986 I was furious at the injustice of it. 25 00:03:41,593 --> 00:03:43,991 And, uh, then really, for the first time in my life 26 00:03:43,992 --> 00:03:47,015 I actually began to take a real and practical interest in the homeless. 27 00:03:47,223 --> 00:03:49,621 Fuck off, pisshead! 28 00:03:52,437 --> 00:03:55,252 I'd like to introduce to you Alexander Masters, 29 00:03:55,367 --> 00:03:59,027 a dedicated friend of the homeless himself, chairman of the campaign. 30 00:04:03,177 --> 00:04:05,262 Oh, we were convinced they'd never be convicted. 31 00:04:05,366 --> 00:04:09,850 I mean, if prisons can't control drugs then how could Ruth and John be expected to? 32 00:04:10,079 --> 00:04:14,124 As everyone knows, we're here this evening about Ruth Wyner and John� 33 00:04:14,125 --> 00:04:19,547 The judge, Justice Howarth, sent them down� �for five years, and four years. 34 00:04:19,870 --> 00:04:21,424 - Shame. - Thank you. 35 00:04:21,455 --> 00:04:23,822 - Fascist. - Thank you. 36 00:04:24,344 --> 00:04:27,107 But this is the crunch, what are we going to do about it? 37 00:04:28,514 --> 00:04:31,225 How is this campaign going to get Ruth and John out? 38 00:04:32,602 --> 00:04:33,728 - Yes? - We could send them books. 39 00:04:33,801 --> 00:04:36,022 Bunyan, he's good for prisons. 40 00:04:36,231 --> 00:04:39,651 Hardly. Miracle of the Rose, by Genet, if you must. 41 00:04:39,677 --> 00:04:44,155 Excuse me, this isn't gonna work. 42 00:04:44,989 --> 00:04:51,037 Sending them books, eh? It won't fit in the box. 43 00:04:52,184 --> 00:04:55,208 - Sorry? - The inmate's belongings. 44 00:04:58,753 --> 00:05:00,734 Everyone's got one. 45 00:05:01,037 --> 00:05:06,782 - Who is that? - No idea. They all look the same to me. 46 00:05:06,990 --> 00:05:11,422 �you're also allowed a piece of carpet what won't fit in your box, 47 00:05:12,725 --> 00:05:17,418 and a budgie or, or a canary, 48 00:05:18,147 --> 00:05:21,886 and obviously the cage is not going to fit in the box. 49 00:05:22,266 --> 00:05:26,906 But, it is Ruth and John what will suffer. 50 00:05:33,892 --> 00:05:41,191 All of them books, the screws will just chuck them out because they won't fit in your box. 51 00:05:42,025 --> 00:05:48,177 I'm not being funny, but you should really know about boxes if you're gonna have a campaign. 52 00:05:55,372 --> 00:06:00,064 Me name's Psycho, but you can call me Stuart, if you like. 53 00:06:00,481 --> 00:06:07,520 - Um, what's your address? - Umm... 2 Laurel Lane. 54 00:06:10,179 --> 00:06:19,511 Yeah, they help me: doctors, a couple clothes, outreach, sometimes lunch with two puddings. 55 00:06:19,876 --> 00:06:25,663 Yeah, they put it all on, those two. And the staff. 56 00:06:26,549 --> 00:06:32,180 I'm not being funny, yeah, but I am really grateful. 57 00:06:34,901 --> 00:06:38,540 - The other day I got a really [indiscernible]. - Oh, great. 58 00:06:42,190 --> 00:06:44,286 - Can I help? - Yeah, uh, yeah. 59 00:06:44,379 --> 00:06:46,882 That's how I first met Stuart Shorter. 60 00:06:47,403 --> 00:06:53,117 Street brawler, alcoholic, a heroin addict, sociopathic street raconteur with a fondness 61 00:06:53,118 --> 00:06:58,821 for what he called "little strips of silver". Knives, to you and me. 62 00:07:13,367 --> 00:07:17,903 - Thank you very much for agreeing to store these. - Oh, no problem. 63 00:07:25,879 --> 00:07:30,884 Mind the step. Oh, dear. Here you go, mate. 64 00:07:31,927 --> 00:07:36,254 Welcome to my humble abode. 65 00:07:36,411 --> 00:07:42,875 2 Laurel Lane. Well, they are laurels, aren't they? 66 00:07:45,795 --> 00:07:50,487 I only heard about the meeting this morning when I was picking up my breakfast. 67 00:07:54,137 --> 00:07:56,118 - Your address? - Mm-hm. 68 00:07:56,222 --> 00:08:02,687 A bad idea, number one, mate. You could get any old riff-raff showing up. Oh, dear, dear. 69 00:08:12,874 --> 00:08:14,261 Yes? 70 00:08:17,076 --> 00:08:17,911 It's you. 71 00:08:19,892 --> 00:08:22,186 I've addressed some envelopes. 72 00:08:27,973 --> 00:08:30,110 - Which, uh... - They alright? 73 00:08:31,987 --> 00:08:33,134 Horrible. 74 00:08:33,499 --> 00:08:39,547 I've had a blinding idea for the campaign. Yeah, get us on television and all. 75 00:08:40,006 --> 00:08:45,073 Not even violent, if we leave out the kidnapping. 76 00:08:51,486 --> 00:08:54,093 - Do you want to come in? - Oh, yes please. 77 00:08:54,249 --> 00:08:55,448 It's a bit wet out there. 78 00:08:56,804 --> 00:08:58,993 Ooh, that's nice. 79 00:09:17,032 --> 00:09:20,890 - How many sugars? - As many as you got, mate. 80 00:09:59,366 --> 00:10:00,930 H�hot. 81 00:10:06,352 --> 00:10:07,812 All them books. 82 00:10:10,940 --> 00:10:13,338 Have you read all of them? 83 00:10:13,599 --> 00:10:14,381 No. 84 00:10:14,798 --> 00:10:15,841 Half? 85 00:10:17,509 --> 00:10:19,073 Not exactly. 86 00:10:21,148 --> 00:10:24,808 The Hunting Wasp. 87 00:10:25,225 --> 00:10:28,666 A whole book about them little summer things. 88 00:10:33,671 --> 00:10:38,468 This one. What is this one about? 89 00:10:40,240 --> 00:10:41,492 The colour mauve. 90 00:10:47,445 --> 00:10:50,615 How do you fucking get away with this? 91 00:11:00,052 --> 00:11:04,431 Now, this blinding idea. 92 00:11:05,015 --> 00:11:06,725 Have you got a car? 93 00:11:08,081 --> 00:11:08,915 No. 94 00:11:09,123 --> 00:11:15,797 What do you like better: Volvo or VW? 95 00:11:19,863 --> 00:11:26,432 And then a few weeks later I had the idea about the book and started doing a little research. 96 00:11:27,058 --> 00:11:31,437 That boy has suffered. He deserves a book. 97 00:11:33,523 --> 00:11:35,504 You should write a book about me. 98 00:11:36,338 --> 00:11:38,424 Always such a caring boy. 99 00:11:39,049 --> 00:11:40,509 Happy-go-lucky little thing. 100 00:11:41,760 --> 00:11:44,576 Legs all over the show, bless him. 101 00:11:45,410 --> 00:11:48,224 Three months after that we carried out Stuart's blinding idea 102 00:11:48,225 --> 00:11:51,873 which was a sleep-over protest in front of the home office 103 00:11:51,874 --> 00:11:56,254 to persuade the then Home Secretary, Jack Straw, to release Ruth and John. 104 00:11:56,921 --> 00:11:59,799 Which was better than his first idea, which was to kidnap him. 105 00:12:01,259 --> 00:12:05,743 Stuart took care of our transport. Somehow. 106 00:12:06,472 --> 00:12:11,123 And on the way to London I read him the first few pages of my book idea. 107 00:12:11,582 --> 00:12:17,629 "Stuart Clive Shorter was a happy-go-lucky little boy, 'the most considerate of my children', marvels his mother." 108 00:12:17,932 --> 00:12:20,549 Bollocks! Boring! 109 00:12:21,060 --> 00:12:23,364 Why do you want to write this fucking book anyway? 110 00:12:24,198 --> 00:12:26,336 To make lots and lots and lots of money. 111 00:12:26,492 --> 00:12:29,881 Seriously? You think you can make money out of it? 112 00:12:30,455 --> 00:12:31,602 Could, maybe. 113 00:12:31,706 --> 00:12:33,479 Something as boring as that? 114 00:12:33,572 --> 00:12:36,242 Don't be so rude. Anyway, it's not my fault that you started out so dull. 115 00:12:38,796 --> 00:12:40,986 You got make it more exciting. 116 00:12:43,082 --> 00:12:49,119 Do it backwards. Like a murder mystery. Like a best-seller. 117 00:12:49,223 --> 00:12:52,341 You know, like what Tom Clancy writes. 118 00:12:52,352 --> 00:12:55,271 Yeah! How'd I get to be like this? 119 00:12:55,375 --> 00:12:57,930 What murdered the little boy I was? 120 00:12:59,640 --> 00:13:01,840 Make them nine-to-five sit up. 121 00:13:10,078 --> 00:13:16,073 I mean, you put ten socks in the washing machine and only seven come out. 122 00:13:16,334 --> 00:13:17,898 Where do they go? 123 00:13:18,419 --> 00:13:20,244 - Stuart? - I'll tell you another thing and all� 124 00:13:20,296 --> 00:13:22,580 - Stuart? � You take the machine apart and it ain't in it neither. 125 00:13:22,590 --> 00:13:23,622 - Stuart? - What? 126 00:13:23,633 --> 00:13:26,751 - What's this? - What? - This. 127 00:13:27,908 --> 00:13:32,079 That, Alexander, is a lice. 128 00:13:37,709 --> 00:13:41,724 The main place you get those is around your bollocks. 129 00:13:43,340 --> 00:13:46,990 That lice, that'll grow. 130 00:13:47,615 --> 00:13:57,000 Scabies are smaller and they go under the skin and live there, literally nibbling. 131 00:14:00,117 --> 00:14:05,341 It took five and a half hours for our convoy to do the 50 miles from Cambridge to London. 132 00:14:05,863 --> 00:14:08,469 Stuart would never drive above 30 miles an hour. 133 00:14:10,868 --> 00:14:13,474 Hey, Buckingham Palace. 134 00:14:14,830 --> 00:14:18,688 What a load of bollocks! Huh! 135 00:14:20,189 --> 00:14:21,868 Who needs a queen? 136 00:14:32,035 --> 00:14:35,893 - Oh, no, no, no, no. No, not like that. - What? 137 00:14:36,101 --> 00:14:40,376 Use this, right? Underneath, yeah? Here you are. 138 00:14:40,533 --> 00:14:44,756 You lose more heat that way than you do that way. 139 00:14:44,964 --> 00:14:49,229 Ruth and John need these: eyes on the back of their heads! 140 00:14:49,239 --> 00:14:51,116 End [indiscernible] police state now! 141 00:14:53,723 --> 00:14:55,913 People are being wrongfully imprisoned for working in a charity 142 00:14:55,914 --> 00:14:57,404 and doing nothing but trying to help the homeless. 143 00:15:00,084 --> 00:15:03,577 Charity workers in prison because of a miscarriage of� oh, fuck off. 144 00:15:18,592 --> 00:15:22,997 Charity workers in prison because of a miscarriage of justice. 145 00:15:23,004 --> 00:15:24,066 Okay, listen up, everyone! 146 00:15:24,796 --> 00:15:28,549 Okay, everyone! Listen up! Everyone, please. Quiet, please! 147 00:15:28,810 --> 00:15:31,365 Everyone, we need you to move this way, thank you. 148 00:15:31,625 --> 00:15:33,867 Wait a minute, hold on, hold on. Why? This is a peaceful protest. 149 00:15:34,076 --> 00:15:35,013 Yeah! Fucking why? 150 00:15:35,119 --> 00:15:38,141 You can't cross these brass flags if the Home Office doesn't want you to. 151 00:15:38,142 --> 00:15:39,184 That's social fucking fascism, that is! 152 00:15:39,185 --> 00:15:42,522 And then we must put a fence in behind you to ensure you're not trespassing 153 00:15:42,626 --> 00:15:47,214 and ones on either side to protect you. - What? 154 00:15:47,423 --> 00:15:52,730 From the public, sir. They might step on you. And a fence in front just in case 155 00:15:52,731 --> 00:15:55,196 during the night you roll onto the road and get run over. 156 00:15:55,217 --> 00:15:57,537 Oh, I see. So you mean to cage us in completely. 157 00:15:57,975 --> 00:16:01,478 I didn't say cage, sir, no. That was your word. 158 00:16:07,338 --> 00:16:09,215 Do prisoners really get wages? 159 00:16:11,509 --> 00:16:13,177 Yeah. 160 00:16:13,595 --> 00:16:15,471 You mean a lot like normal people? 161 00:16:15,680 --> 00:16:18,287 Yeah, make a fucking fortune. 162 00:16:18,808 --> 00:16:22,197 Millionaires coming out of the nick every week. 163 00:16:31,112 --> 00:16:33,197 You've been in a lot of prisons then? 164 00:16:33,396 --> 00:16:36,326 Have I? Fucking hell. 165 00:16:36,951 --> 00:16:38,515 How many? 166 00:16:38,932 --> 00:16:41,435 Well, um... 167 00:16:48,734 --> 00:16:54,573 Well, start off, when I was a nipper there was Send Detention Centre, 168 00:16:57,180 --> 00:16:59,839 Baintnow House, back to Send again, 169 00:17:01,663 --> 00:17:04,687 Eriestoke, Norwich, 170 00:17:05,834 --> 00:17:09,692 then I grew up and went to big boy prison. 171 00:17:12,768 --> 00:17:17,513 Whitemoor. Aw, now that's what I call a real prison. 172 00:17:17,533 --> 00:17:19,389 You got everything there, mate: 173 00:17:19,442 --> 00:17:30,651 terrorists, psychopaths, security threats, murderers, manslaughters, crazies... 174 00:17:30,745 --> 00:17:32,111 Which lot do you belong to? 175 00:17:35,864 --> 00:17:39,305 Crazies, really. Mm, yeah. 176 00:17:39,618 --> 00:17:43,580 Norwich, Whitemoor again. 177 00:17:45,249 --> 00:17:48,898 Grendon Underground. 178 00:17:50,567 --> 00:17:52,339 Thirty-one. 179 00:17:55,259 --> 00:17:57,553 I don't think I've missed any. 180 00:18:01,932 --> 00:18:05,373 Oh yes, I have actually! I've been to Leicester three times as well. 181 00:18:08,293 --> 00:18:10,482 Wayland was me last one. 182 00:18:17,260 --> 00:18:18,824 Good night. Sleep well. 183 00:18:18,928 --> 00:18:22,213 Thank you. Same to you. 184 00:18:22,630 --> 00:18:28,156 Oi, you. Since you got so much fucking time on your hands, yeah, 185 00:18:28,157 --> 00:18:34,100 answer this one: do you know how many people 186 00:18:34,101 --> 00:18:39,470 get killed by screws in prison every year? Murders. 187 00:18:39,574 --> 00:18:44,996 Oh, sorry, Gov. Excuse us, how was we supposed to know that bending him in half 188 00:18:44,997 --> 00:18:48,958 the wrong fucking way was bad for his health? 189 00:18:48,963 --> 00:18:54,161 It was only people like me what is really rotten, isn't it? Really bad. 190 00:18:54,172 --> 00:18:59,594 Beyond hope. You haven't got the faintest fucking clue, have you? Huh? 191 00:19:00,011 --> 00:19:04,338 - Yeah, all he said was "Good night". - You can fuck off and all you fucking geeky� 192 00:19:04,339 --> 00:19:12,106 - Oh, shut up yourself, Stuart. - You fucking wanking middle class cunt fuck, Alexander. 193 00:19:12,117 --> 00:19:18,675 You want to know how I became what I am? I'm giving you fucking answers! 194 00:19:20,240 --> 00:19:25,276 Why don't you write a book with no fucking answers, eh? 195 00:19:29,259 --> 00:19:33,795 Go on, you fuck off. You find your fucking answers. 196 00:19:50,113 --> 00:19:56,630 On a scale of anger, one to ten, I'm probably on four and Stuart's on eleven. 197 00:19:56,786 --> 00:19:59,445 You never can tell... 198 00:19:59,810 --> 00:20:03,356 how families have been down and they've been up then they've been down again. 199 00:20:03,357 --> 00:20:06,849 You just like Stuart, you know? 200 00:20:07,474 --> 00:20:10,915 Drugs, prison, being a beggar. 201 00:20:13,407 --> 00:20:14,148 Go on, go on. 202 00:20:24,210 --> 00:20:25,252 Yeah, mate. 203 00:20:25,826 --> 00:20:27,599 - Bastards! - Morning. 204 00:20:30,205 --> 00:20:31,404 Like the taste of piss, eh? 205 00:20:33,229 --> 00:20:35,106 You bastards. 206 00:20:35,325 --> 00:20:37,191 Someone smells nice. 207 00:20:38,756 --> 00:20:41,310 After three months of preparation. 208 00:20:43,500 --> 00:20:46,258 I mean, who's bloody stupid idea was it that we camp out over the weekend anyway, 209 00:20:46,263 --> 00:20:49,600 the one time Mr. Straw's not going to be there? 210 00:20:49,808 --> 00:20:51,659 - I bet it was yours. - Oh, fuck off. 211 00:21:00,079 --> 00:21:02,477 - Oh, I like this song. - This is a good song. 212 00:21:25,313 --> 00:21:27,867 Still, one blimey thing did come out of that weekend: 213 00:21:28,962 --> 00:21:31,829 Stuart's idea that his life should be written backwards. 214 00:21:43,039 --> 00:21:46,532 It was cutting me throat what done it. 215 00:21:47,262 --> 00:21:51,818 Put a beer glass into me neck. Just lost it. 216 00:21:59,722 --> 00:22:04,539 Sometimes you wouldn't believe how hard it is to fucking die. 217 00:22:06,030 --> 00:22:09,419 So, you got a council for that, because you tried to kill yourself? 218 00:22:10,201 --> 00:22:13,225 Works a trick for the old housing points, doesn't it? 219 00:22:13,277 --> 00:22:16,301 Whoosh! Straight to the top of the list. 220 00:22:18,543 --> 00:22:20,576 It's not all gone though. 221 00:22:20,587 --> 00:22:22,192 What's not all gone? 222 00:22:23,756 --> 00:22:25,842 The hatred. 223 00:22:26,572 --> 00:22:31,264 I got so many enemies. Up here, mate. 224 00:22:32,619 --> 00:22:35,487 Somebody's going to get hurt though, that's what scares me. 225 00:22:36,269 --> 00:22:38,041 When's this thing going to happen? 226 00:22:40,440 --> 00:22:42,838 I call it me "black mists". 227 00:22:43,568 --> 00:22:48,573 Next week? Next month? Next ten seconds? 228 00:23:16,309 --> 00:23:19,802 That is lovely bit of workmanship. 229 00:23:29,760 --> 00:23:33,149 That's value. That's value. 230 00:23:35,703 --> 00:23:41,125 Oh my God. This for the series. 231 00:23:56,557 --> 00:23:58,591 For my son. 232 00:24:01,041 --> 00:24:02,501 You've got a son!? 233 00:24:02,814 --> 00:24:07,506 Yeah. In Glasgow with his mum. 234 00:24:09,070 --> 00:24:11,677 Fourteen years of age to mind. 235 00:24:12,719 --> 00:24:15,535 Always out on the golf course, the little 'un. 236 00:24:23,251 --> 00:24:27,317 Not bad there, mate. Not better than Laurel Lane. 237 00:24:41,655 --> 00:24:45,064 Wine always smells like sick. 238 00:24:45,565 --> 00:24:47,807 Here, have a beer. 239 00:24:53,333 --> 00:24:54,960 Fancy something to eat? 240 00:25:28,994 --> 00:25:31,444 So why do you want to be a writer, then? 241 00:25:31,705 --> 00:25:36,188 Oh, I don't know, really. Bit like a disease, all my family's got it. 242 00:25:36,970 --> 00:25:38,847 Didn't want to be left out, did I? 243 00:25:39,160 --> 00:25:41,298 Nah. I know what you mean, mate. 244 00:25:41,975 --> 00:25:44,030 Me dad is a thief, 245 00:25:44,165 --> 00:25:46,563 and, um, me mum's a barmaid. 246 00:25:49,066 --> 00:25:51,620 What's the colour orange highlighter in your diary for? 247 00:25:52,298 --> 00:25:54,071 Family stuff. 248 00:25:57,324 --> 00:25:58,393 Yellow? 249 00:25:58,398 --> 00:25:59,754 Social. 250 00:26:06,740 --> 00:26:13,413 Now, uh, this book that you're writing about me, 251 00:26:15,238 --> 00:26:17,010 is it just to make your name? 252 00:26:18,157 --> 00:26:19,930 And yours. 253 00:26:23,371 --> 00:26:28,793 I've, uh, had an idea for a job, too. 254 00:26:30,878 --> 00:26:36,092 For the foreign businessman what doesn't have time to waste, 255 00:26:37,656 --> 00:26:39,220 what does he need? 256 00:26:41,306 --> 00:26:45,998 An office... in a van. 257 00:26:49,647 --> 00:26:51,232 It's lateral thinking, isn't it? 258 00:26:52,723 --> 00:26:56,925 Gets off the plane at Stansted, straight into the back of me van. 259 00:26:58,510 --> 00:27:00,231 That will have everything: 260 00:27:01,638 --> 00:27:04,714 good-looking bird what can do shorthand, 261 00:27:05,027 --> 00:27:12,848 fax, internet, wires all over the fucking gaff. It's brilliant. 262 00:27:13,650 --> 00:27:16,184 Red sauce or brown? 263 00:27:16,414 --> 00:27:19,000 Oh, yes please. I mean, uh, red. 264 00:27:19,052 --> 00:27:23,222 - What�What's� - Oh yeah, that fella upstairs 265 00:27:23,640 --> 00:27:30,521 is gonna make me a bed what folds up against the wall, like what James Bond has. 266 00:27:30,751 --> 00:27:34,441 - Ooh. - Yeah. It's got to have, um, 267 00:27:34,442 --> 00:27:40,558 springs and latches on the floor otherwise it's boing, boing, whoosh! 268 00:27:40,844 --> 00:27:42,825 Boing, boing, whoosh? 269 00:27:43,399 --> 00:27:49,030 You know what I mean, bird's not going to be too happy if she gets her face 270 00:27:49,031 --> 00:27:52,575 squeezed up against the plaster, is she? 271 00:27:54,295 --> 00:27:55,755 Hey. 272 00:28:00,291 --> 00:28:01,281 Sorry. 273 00:28:02,950 --> 00:28:07,850 Good stuff, that. You can use it with anything. 274 00:28:08,372 --> 00:28:17,756 See that right by the bed? This should be a huge stain where I overdosed there last week. 275 00:28:17,757 --> 00:28:25,577 And all the spilled cans and vomit. That cleaned it up really, really well, actually. 276 00:28:27,036 --> 00:28:36,264 But you want to, um, you want to leave it, uh, for about... about a week before you vacuum. 277 00:29:05,095 --> 00:29:06,242 Here you are, mate. 278 00:29:10,413 --> 00:29:13,035 Careful, yeah? It's a bit hot. 279 00:29:26,544 --> 00:29:29,338 I never asked you why you were in prison. 280 00:29:30,224 --> 00:29:35,177 The last time� Stupid things. 281 00:29:36,064 --> 00:29:41,173 Me mate, Smithy, well bubblegum chap, 282 00:29:41,486 --> 00:29:44,927 I'm not being funny, he's in the Guinness Book of Records. 283 00:29:46,908 --> 00:29:50,192 1983 edition, as it goes. 284 00:29:51,183 --> 00:29:54,415 Like brothers fighting the world. 285 00:29:55,875 --> 00:29:59,629 Respect, trust, and honour. 286 00:30:07,658 --> 00:30:08,909 Go, go, go, go, go! 287 00:30:10,942 --> 00:30:11,516 Right. 288 00:30:19,388 --> 00:30:20,535 Ow. 289 00:30:30,702 --> 00:30:35,811 - Oh, fuck. Did you get menthols? - Menthols? Fuck off. 290 00:30:35,915 --> 00:30:40,034 - She'll fucking kill me. She asked for menthols. - Well, give her the vodka. 291 00:30:40,044 --> 00:30:42,583 She don't want vodka, she wants menthols! 292 00:30:53,798 --> 00:30:55,622 Go, go, go, go, go! 293 00:30:55,727 --> 00:30:59,793 Aw, I don't believe it! These aren't fucking menthols either! 294 00:30:59,845 --> 00:31:03,411 They're just in a green packet. I've got ten packets of green cigarettes. 295 00:31:07,629 --> 00:31:09,282 Hurry up. 296 00:31:09,803 --> 00:31:11,367 25 quid, 60!? 297 00:31:12,827 --> 00:31:17,279 Women! They think they can boss you about in everything, don't they? 298 00:31:17,446 --> 00:31:22,837 And one day, Smithy got a tip-off. 299 00:31:27,112 --> 00:31:30,397 - 20,000 quid? - Just keeps it under the counter. 300 00:31:30,470 --> 00:31:32,326 Not a cop shop in 20 miles. 301 00:31:33,264 --> 00:31:37,748 Fucking� That's fucking irresponsible. 302 00:31:38,478 --> 00:31:40,459 No pride of ownership. 303 00:31:46,663 --> 00:31:47,862 Go, go, go, go, go! 304 00:31:52,554 --> 00:31:53,597 Right. 305 00:32:03,816 --> 00:32:09,707 Let's just say it was funny because as soon as we was sent down, 306 00:32:09,712 --> 00:32:13,513 Smithy's missus moved in with the fella what told us about the job. 307 00:32:14,973 --> 00:32:16,432 Five years. 308 00:32:19,143 --> 00:32:23,314 Pretty steep sentence. Were you armed? 309 00:32:23,315 --> 00:32:24,878 No. 310 00:32:31,187 --> 00:32:32,829 Only with a crowbar. 311 00:32:45,733 --> 00:32:49,643 Hey, Alexander? You wanna stay for tea? 312 00:32:50,425 --> 00:32:53,709 Me favourite, "convict curry". 313 00:32:54,178 --> 00:32:56,629 We used to make it in jail. 314 00:32:57,724 --> 00:32:59,809 Ooh, mushrooms! 315 00:33:13,385 --> 00:33:16,023 - What about the first time, then? - First time what? 316 00:33:17,222 --> 00:33:19,621 Well, that you were sentenced as an adult. 317 00:33:31,090 --> 00:33:37,868 I can't� I can't really talk about that, mate. 318 00:33:42,560 --> 00:33:47,044 But, I mean, robbing an empty post office is� 319 00:33:47,045 --> 00:33:55,281 Burgle. Rob people, burgle post offices. 320 00:33:55,458 --> 00:33:59,765 Yeah, but what I mean is it's hardly a Schedule 1 offence, is it? 321 00:34:00,026 --> 00:34:01,329 Of course not. 322 00:34:04,196 --> 00:34:06,021 Well, that's serious, isn't it? 323 00:34:20,150 --> 00:34:22,496 It wasn't kiddie fiddling. 324 00:34:29,847 --> 00:34:32,662 I didn't say that it was. 325 00:34:35,582 --> 00:34:37,146 It wasn't. 326 00:34:43,089 --> 00:34:45,383 We'll talk about it Thursday, yeah? 327 00:34:48,564 --> 00:34:50,649 Thursday afternoon. 328 00:34:56,332 --> 00:34:58,365 Another time, right? 329 00:35:52,899 --> 00:35:58,112 Then you mop with the bread. Mop up your juices. 330 00:36:11,511 --> 00:36:15,369 So, smash the window, break the steering wheel lock 331 00:36:15,370 --> 00:36:18,185 by turning the wheel in opposing directions. 332 00:36:18,549 --> 00:36:23,554 Yeah. And if the street is too public to use a brick... 333 00:36:23,607 --> 00:36:28,351 Slide stick. Remove the metal band from a pallet of bricks, reduce to eighteen inches, 334 00:36:28,352 --> 00:36:31,948 remove a notch from one side, insert into door panel. 335 00:36:33,293 --> 00:36:35,911 Ba-kow! I'm in the post office! Boot in the rubble! 336 00:36:35,963 --> 00:36:39,299 No, there's no point in ram-raiding a post office. 337 00:36:39,508 --> 00:36:42,167 - Why not? - Can't you not pay attention? 338 00:36:42,219 --> 00:36:47,860 There's no point in ram-raiding a fucking post office. There's never no money in the till, is there? 339 00:36:51,916 --> 00:36:53,272 Gone are them days. 340 00:36:54,419 --> 00:36:56,713 I forgot money. 341 00:37:00,284 --> 00:37:01,561 Here. 342 00:37:03,386 --> 00:37:07,140 No, no, no, no. I'll get a taxi, I'll stop at a bank on the way. 343 00:37:07,265 --> 00:37:10,226 No, honestly, take it. It's me beer money. 344 00:37:10,247 --> 00:37:13,073 You'll be doing me a favour. 345 00:37:13,187 --> 00:37:15,534 You'll be doing society a favour. 346 00:37:18,192 --> 00:37:20,930 And buy a fucking car. 347 00:37:21,049 --> 00:37:23,354 Get yourself a fucking license. 348 00:37:24,866 --> 00:37:26,221 Oh, I almost forgot. 349 00:37:26,743 --> 00:37:29,089 Here. Bought you this. 350 00:37:30,184 --> 00:37:32,165 Your black mists. 351 00:37:33,833 --> 00:37:36,231 Thought you could talk into it next time you're in one. 352 00:37:37,712 --> 00:37:39,255 You'll be okay? 353 00:37:40,194 --> 00:37:41,445 Call if you need any help. 354 00:37:42,696 --> 00:37:44,938 2am, 4am, anytime. 355 00:37:45,042 --> 00:37:48,848 Yeah, so you can bring a fucking camera? 356 00:37:52,393 --> 00:37:53,123 Oi! 357 00:37:58,441 --> 00:38:00,641 You're alright, Alexander. 358 00:38:20,129 --> 00:38:25,550 Often used to say to Stuart, "I wish I could just pick you up sometimes, 359 00:38:25,551 --> 00:38:30,202 turn you upside down and shake all the bad things out of your head, 360 00:38:30,244 --> 00:38:32,850 then put you back up the right way again." 361 00:38:34,597 --> 00:38:36,291 The change in him. 362 00:38:36,604 --> 00:38:38,377 We just couldn't understand it. 363 00:38:41,609 --> 00:38:44,226 And of course I would like to thank you all for coming here today 364 00:38:44,258 --> 00:38:48,126 to hear me talk about the campaign and the petition. 365 00:38:48,387 --> 00:38:53,235 Stuart and I gave nine or ten talks together about the campaign that spring 366 00:38:53,261 --> 00:38:57,354 in Burmingham, London, Oxford, and of course villages around Cambridge. 367 00:38:57,458 --> 00:38:58,501 Mr Stuart Clive Shorter. 368 00:38:58,658 --> 00:39:03,244 I'd speak first, and then Stuart would get up and knock the audience off its 369 00:39:03,245 --> 00:39:04,862 seats with the story of his life. 370 00:39:05,018 --> 00:39:14,037 A typical suicide attempt, just an unbearable sense of hatred, waste� 371 00:39:14,069 --> 00:39:17,270 "I am the nightmare you frighten your children with", he said. 372 00:39:17,280 --> 00:39:21,024 "The sort of person these two charity workers were trying to help to get off your streets." 373 00:39:21,649 --> 00:39:25,872 "We should have awarded Ruth and John medals instead of sending them to prison." 374 00:39:25,877 --> 00:39:33,015 �so I just twisted around and I emptied everything that remained into my right buttock. 375 00:39:33,020 --> 00:39:34,996 Stuart did two things for the campaign, really. 376 00:39:35,100 --> 00:39:37,811 He folded letters 377 00:39:38,124 --> 00:39:40,001 and he exposed his soul. 378 00:39:46,361 --> 00:39:47,508 That alright? 379 00:39:55,537 --> 00:39:57,936 - Exactly. So, if we write� - Oh, this is your name. 380 00:39:58,457 --> 00:40:00,542 If we solve the puzzle, do we solve you? 381 00:40:02,471 --> 00:40:05,756 He's just... He's just very, very interesting, you know? 382 00:40:05,757 --> 00:40:07,268 He tells me about a world I knew nothing about 383 00:40:07,283 --> 00:40:10,969 and... I... I just like him. 384 00:40:11,491 --> 00:40:17,747 It's absolutely extraordinary. He knows the exact day that he changed into a sociopath. 385 00:40:17,748 --> 00:40:19,832 Between 4pm and 5pm. The exact day! 386 00:40:20,667 --> 00:40:25,359 It's like knowing what was in Dr Jekyll's potion that turned him into Mr Hyde. 387 00:40:29,947 --> 00:40:33,596 This thing, Stuart's black mist, came that night. 388 00:40:34,952 --> 00:40:37,037 Apparently it started by a knife fight. 389 00:40:39,018 --> 00:40:41,781 The first I heard about it was a call a day later from his mother. 390 00:40:55,076 --> 00:40:56,327 At least there's no blood. 391 00:40:57,370 --> 00:40:59,090 Usually there is blood. 392 00:41:01,645 --> 00:41:03,418 Perhaps the cleaners have been 'round. 393 00:41:05,190 --> 00:41:06,389 Just for the blood. 394 00:41:17,181 --> 00:41:18,850 Campaign's helped him a lot, you know. 395 00:41:19,788 --> 00:41:21,092 Kept him straight. 396 00:41:21,738 --> 00:41:24,741 Ain't been this happy since he was a little boy. 397 00:41:34,282 --> 00:41:36,002 "Alexander only." 398 00:41:42,321 --> 00:41:50,861 Hello, Alexander. It's Stuart. You know, admitting I've had lots to drink and that, but 399 00:41:50,862 --> 00:41:53,676 I can't help reflect about� 400 00:41:56,638 --> 00:41:59,349 Stuart had been bailed to appear at Cambridge Magistrate's Court. 401 00:42:02,748 --> 00:42:04,833 I went with him for moral support. 402 00:42:21,308 --> 00:42:23,706 They don't look too upset to be here. 403 00:42:24,853 --> 00:42:28,190 Well, wait till they get to Crown Court, that's when it gets serious. 404 00:42:28,242 --> 00:42:30,380 Godspeed the day. 405 00:42:40,087 --> 00:42:41,641 Excuse me, you're about to fall off� 406 00:42:41,642 --> 00:42:42,579 Fuck off. 407 00:42:43,528 --> 00:42:45,811 Good lad, just say that to the nasty man with the wig and 408 00:42:45,812 --> 00:42:47,178 everything will be fine. 409 00:42:48,940 --> 00:42:54,675 Sometimes it takes so long you forget what your fucking crime was. 410 00:42:56,343 --> 00:43:00,931 Here, listen to this. It's the little 'un. 411 00:43:03,434 --> 00:43:08,074 If I don't know you, fuck off! I'm not in and I don't wanna talk to you! 412 00:43:10,211 --> 00:43:12,609 I didn't think it was like that. 413 00:43:13,965 --> 00:43:17,093 I was thinking maybe he should go to business school. 414 00:43:18,031 --> 00:43:20,013 But now I don't know. 415 00:43:21,055 --> 00:43:22,202 He ain't right. 416 00:43:23,349 --> 00:43:27,833 I've had to have words with him about the importance of politeness. 417 00:43:28,094 --> 00:43:29,293 He's fourteen. 418 00:43:29,595 --> 00:43:32,004 It really shocked me, to be honest. 419 00:43:34,402 --> 00:43:35,758 Mr Shorter? 420 00:43:37,009 --> 00:43:42,327 According to police statements they could smell smoking oil when they arrived on the scene. 421 00:43:43,182 --> 00:43:44,412 Chip fat. 422 00:43:53,067 --> 00:43:55,673 It was the anniversary of my brother's death. 423 00:43:59,636 --> 00:44:02,263 I wanted to burn the devil out of myself. 424 00:44:38,737 --> 00:44:42,599 The Magistrate's Court decided they couldn't handle the complexities of Stuart's case 425 00:44:42,600 --> 00:44:45,202 so they referred it to the Crown Court. 426 00:44:46,557 --> 00:44:49,321 Disgrace. Forty policemen and you still get bailed? 427 00:44:49,373 --> 00:44:51,281 Beats me why you hate the system. 428 00:44:53,856 --> 00:44:56,474 Well, my mum says she doesn't understand it neither. 429 00:44:59,591 --> 00:45:04,127 What did the barrister mean when he was talking about "attempted manslaughter"? 430 00:45:06,578 --> 00:45:10,331 I reckon I tried to cut my neighbour's head off with a bread knife. 431 00:45:11,009 --> 00:45:12,688 You didn't. Did you? 432 00:45:14,919 --> 00:45:16,692 Yeah. 433 00:45:20,550 --> 00:45:23,000 And if he hadn't have moved, I'd have got him too. 434 00:45:31,081 --> 00:45:34,731 So you called your neighbour who made your boing-boing-whoosh bed 435 00:45:34,732 --> 00:45:38,172 a poofter and then that's why he lost it? 436 00:45:38,902 --> 00:45:41,362 No, he thought that I called him a poofter. 437 00:45:41,368 --> 00:45:44,011 - And you did nothing of the sort? - No. 438 00:45:44,219 --> 00:45:46,096 Then what did you do? 439 00:45:46,200 --> 00:45:49,537 I just asked his friend if he was a poofter. 440 00:45:52,144 --> 00:45:54,438 It's not a joke, Alexander! 441 00:45:54,542 --> 00:45:57,748 - Well, I mean� - When my bell's up, I'm looking at life! 442 00:46:09,661 --> 00:46:11,215 I've lost my keys somewhere. 443 00:46:14,249 --> 00:46:18,629 So you didn't call your neighbour who made your boing-boing-whoosh bed a poofter. 444 00:46:20,401 --> 00:46:25,406 But what� What did his mate say when you called... 445 00:46:25,771 --> 00:46:27,909 What did his mate say when you asked him if he was a poofter? 446 00:46:29,994 --> 00:46:34,968 Just... said he suffered from premature ejaculation. 447 00:46:37,815 --> 00:46:40,943 Which I thought was quite interesting at the time 448 00:46:41,464 --> 00:46:45,426 because I suffer from the same complaint myself. 449 00:46:59,180 --> 00:47:02,631 Um, I'm going to see some friends in Norfolk next week. 450 00:47:02,944 --> 00:47:04,299 Come along. 451 00:47:04,612 --> 00:47:06,385 No, can't. 452 00:47:08,262 --> 00:47:12,380 You heard the Magistrate, I'm not allowed out of Cambridge until me trial. 453 00:47:20,044 --> 00:47:23,381 And another thing about washing machines, right, 454 00:47:23,537 --> 00:47:26,420 this fella on the TV, 455 00:47:26,947 --> 00:47:31,514 he put three of them washing machine inner bits together. 456 00:47:32,557 --> 00:47:35,059 Not even a concrete one. Nothing. 457 00:47:35,685 --> 00:47:38,813 And he said it was a sculpture. 458 00:47:43,140 --> 00:47:45,278 And somebody bought it! 459 00:47:46,321 --> 00:47:48,406 I'm not being funny, yeah? 460 00:47:49,240 --> 00:47:52,577 But there is a viable business opportunity there. 461 00:47:55,809 --> 00:47:57,582 Rent a barn. 462 00:47:58,520 --> 00:48:00,710 Lay out all the bits. 463 00:48:01,753 --> 00:48:05,006 And when you've had enough of washing machines, 464 00:48:06,288 --> 00:48:07,800 do fridges. 465 00:48:09,364 --> 00:48:13,222 You know, that's what really annoys me, Alexander. 466 00:48:13,233 --> 00:48:17,863 I'm always getting these great ideas, you know, about how to make money. 467 00:48:18,905 --> 00:48:21,773 People are always telling me that they're wrong, you know? 468 00:48:21,825 --> 00:48:23,858 I never get no encouragement. 469 00:48:25,162 --> 00:48:27,403 No encouragement at all. 470 00:48:31,678 --> 00:48:33,086 Can you hold the wheel? 471 00:48:36,579 --> 00:48:37,935 You want some? 472 00:48:38,769 --> 00:48:41,271 Uh, yes. Thank you. 473 00:48:41,376 --> 00:48:42,210 Save me some. 474 00:48:42,731 --> 00:48:44,113 I will. 475 00:48:48,664 --> 00:48:51,021 I think I've got a bit of a cold coming. 476 00:48:58,789 --> 00:49:00,874 Here, listen to this! 477 00:49:02,230 --> 00:49:04,472 I apologise for not being currently available. 478 00:49:04,474 --> 00:49:07,443 Be so kind as to leave your name and message. 479 00:49:11,406 --> 00:49:15,055 So, why don't you just get an ordinary job? 480 00:49:16,828 --> 00:49:19,852 - 9 to 5? - That's the one. 481 00:49:20,582 --> 00:49:24,127 Getting up in the morning, coming home late at night. 482 00:49:24,137 --> 00:49:25,159 On the nose. 483 00:49:25,169 --> 00:49:26,525 Full time. 484 00:49:29,027 --> 00:49:30,592 What, have you ever had one of those? 485 00:49:31,009 --> 00:49:32,573 - Nope. - Ohh. 486 00:49:35,492 --> 00:49:38,308 I've done a bit of valeting work for a friend of me brother's. 487 00:49:39,142 --> 00:49:40,602 And? 488 00:49:41,227 --> 00:49:43,000 I head-butted the bloke. 489 00:49:43,834 --> 00:49:46,336 Your version of putting your head down and getting on with it, I suppose. 490 00:49:46,441 --> 00:49:49,141 He tried to fiddle with me sister. 491 00:49:51,143 --> 00:49:54,782 And then later on, you know, ah s� I don't know. 492 00:49:56,451 --> 00:49:58,432 And now you don't know what? 493 00:50:01,664 --> 00:50:03,541 Nothing. Just later on 494 00:50:03,854 --> 00:50:06,878 my brother Gavvy killed himself. 495 00:50:08,650 --> 00:50:10,272 Well, you know don't have to say anything, Stuart. 496 00:50:13,134 --> 00:50:14,855 Talk about it another time. 497 00:50:17,096 --> 00:50:18,973 Yeah. Thanks. 498 00:50:25,334 --> 00:50:28,149 When the police found Gavvy they said he'd really suffered. 499 00:50:29,609 --> 00:50:33,415 The tablets he'd taken had eaten his kidneys and his liver away before he died. 500 00:50:33,743 --> 00:50:36,386 And he had been in absolute agony dying. 501 00:50:36,960 --> 00:50:38,159 And I'm glad. 502 00:50:39,212 --> 00:50:41,600 I'm glad my brother suffered. 503 00:50:48,586 --> 00:50:53,278 - Chainsaw carved mushrooms? - Fucking hell. 504 00:50:53,695 --> 00:50:55,072 What did they do to deserve that? 505 00:51:01,099 --> 00:51:04,748 Fucking nice little number you got going here, mate. 506 00:51:05,478 --> 00:51:07,876 You get many knob heads falling for it? 507 00:51:07,878 --> 00:51:09,857 Yeah, plenty. 508 00:51:39,992 --> 00:51:41,191 Oh wow. 509 00:51:42,416 --> 00:51:43,537 I'm James. Good to see you. 510 00:51:44,892 --> 00:51:46,561 Alexander's told me all about you. 511 00:51:48,021 --> 00:51:49,375 Reuben, yes? 512 00:51:49,376 --> 00:51:51,722 - I'm Dido. - Ah, you have a lovely house. 513 00:51:51,827 --> 00:51:53,547 - Hello, darling. - Hi, hi, hi. 514 00:51:53,729 --> 00:51:55,841 - Good to see you. - This is for you. 515 00:51:55,997 --> 00:51:56,884 Ooh, thank you. Lovely, mmm. 516 00:51:56,941 --> 00:52:00,053 Now, Alexander told you that I'm an alcoholic, hasn't he? 517 00:52:00,095 --> 00:52:05,147 I'm also a Schedule 1 offender and a thief, but I won't cause no trouble. 518 00:52:06,268 --> 00:52:08,875 May I have a tour of the estate, please? 519 00:52:09,813 --> 00:52:13,671 - Is that a pear tree? - Yeah. 520 00:52:15,548 --> 00:52:16,747 You can make cider out of that. 521 00:52:18,155 --> 00:52:19,521 And them apples, eh? 522 00:52:21,377 --> 00:52:24,879 Famous actors used to come here and play tennis, like Lawrence Olivier and� 523 00:52:24,880 --> 00:52:27,487 Lawrence Olivier? Really? Right there? 524 00:52:30,694 --> 00:52:32,544 21-Love! 525 00:52:32,857 --> 00:52:34,682 Hey! 526 00:52:34,734 --> 00:52:38,566 You ought to knock all of them trees down and build a go-kart course. 527 00:52:40,761 --> 00:52:43,675 If you fix this place up it would be really lovely here. 528 00:53:37,505 --> 00:53:40,633 Ooh, [indiscernible]. Very nice. 529 00:53:45,534 --> 00:53:48,349 Ooh, it's very tasty. Yeah. 530 00:53:51,582 --> 00:53:54,293 Fucking amazing here. 531 00:53:58,881 --> 00:54:00,758 Yeah, A-fucking-One. 532 00:54:06,180 --> 00:54:08,474 They're so false. 533 00:54:09,099 --> 00:54:10,976 False tits. 534 00:54:12,123 --> 00:54:16,815 Now, I prefer a bit of natural bounce myself. 535 00:54:18,275 --> 00:54:21,612 I mean, and if they're going to sag, they're going to sag, aren't they? 536 00:54:30,683 --> 00:54:32,508 I don't get it, Alexander. 537 00:54:32,873 --> 00:54:38,139 How come you're so interested in homeless people? 538 00:54:39,103 --> 00:54:42,414 I'm not. I was only working at Wintercomfort because the money was good. 539 00:54:43,092 --> 00:54:47,784 Nine quid an hour. And the hours, shift work. 540 00:54:48,409 --> 00:54:49,713 How long are these onions meant to cook? 541 00:54:52,580 --> 00:54:54,144 Till they feel satisfied. 542 00:54:57,533 --> 00:54:59,212 And then it meant I could write in the morning. 543 00:55:01,183 --> 00:55:03,007 Yeah, but why? 544 00:55:04,040 --> 00:55:07,177 Look, Stuart, if I was interested in you as a homeless person, 545 00:55:07,178 --> 00:55:09,837 I'd have been sacked for unprofessional conduct ages ago. 546 00:55:10,254 --> 00:55:12,965 - So? - So I like you as a friend, is that so bad? 547 00:55:18,127 --> 00:55:19,143 Fenugreek? 548 00:55:22,819 --> 00:55:25,582 It's a bit weird if you ask me. 549 00:55:26,760 --> 00:55:28,022 Couldn't agree more. 550 00:55:31,160 --> 00:55:36,426 �seven, eight. There's always somebody what won't want two. 551 00:55:43,308 --> 00:55:44,716 Yeah, but why? 552 00:55:46,488 --> 00:55:49,095 Because you're funny, intelligent, good company. 553 00:55:49,097 --> 00:55:52,119 What do you want, a fucking love letter? Now shut up and drink your freaking beer. 554 00:55:59,418 --> 00:56:00,565 Marvellous. 555 00:56:01,190 --> 00:56:03,589 - What was it again? - "Convict Curry". 556 00:56:15,893 --> 00:56:18,917 Hey Stuart, it's Thursday! You gotta tell! 557 00:56:19,125 --> 00:56:20,981 No, not now. 558 00:56:21,096 --> 00:56:22,775 Come on. A promise is a promise. 559 00:56:22,900 --> 00:56:25,767 Come on, you've talked to us about everything else. 560 00:56:26,215 --> 00:56:28,040 Give it a rest, Alexander. 561 00:56:30,595 --> 00:56:33,932 - You don't wanna know. - Stuart's first prison sentence. 562 00:56:33,932 --> 00:56:34,792 He'll only talk about it on a Thursday 563 00:56:34,870 --> 00:56:38,935 because he gets his dole money Wednesday afternoons, which means that 564 00:56:38,937 --> 00:56:43,003 if talking about it upsets him, he's still got enough heroin left to calm him down. 565 00:56:43,004 --> 00:56:44,150 Is that right? 566 00:56:48,394 --> 00:56:49,885 It was nothing. 567 00:56:51,449 --> 00:56:53,222 I was� 568 00:56:54,577 --> 00:56:56,663 I was in the pub one night. 569 00:56:57,914 --> 00:57:00,312 It was the little 'un's birthday. 570 00:57:03,753 --> 00:57:06,516 I was, I was in the pub celebrating. 571 00:57:07,715 --> 00:57:10,948 It was over ten years ago. 572 00:57:13,190 --> 00:57:15,431 This bloke says... 573 00:57:17,308 --> 00:57:18,872 It was just nastiness. 574 00:57:18,977 --> 00:57:19,602 Come on. 575 00:57:20,280 --> 00:57:22,730 Alexander, please. 576 00:57:23,252 --> 00:57:25,546 Look, Thursday's the day. 577 00:57:33,157 --> 00:57:35,243 So I come home. 578 00:57:43,272 --> 00:57:46,713 [Indiscernible] says, "you've been fucking [indiscernible]." 579 00:57:47,443 --> 00:57:48,798 You're drunk. 580 00:57:51,301 --> 00:57:53,595 If you want it, you gotta rape me. 581 00:58:00,737 --> 00:58:02,770 I'll fucking kill you, you cunt! 582 00:58:02,979 --> 00:58:04,960 Get out! 583 00:58:05,377 --> 00:58:07,556 You wanted a fucking baby! 584 00:58:12,363 --> 00:58:20,184 And I think then I realised that I had made a proper mess of it all, really. 585 00:58:20,392 --> 00:58:21,643 I'm fucking leaving. 586 00:58:22,999 --> 00:58:24,354 You fucking are now! 587 00:58:27,170 --> 00:58:29,985 Did you fuck around with me!? Yeah!? 588 00:58:33,635 --> 00:58:36,773 I'm a bit ashamed of that to be honest. 589 00:58:45,104 --> 00:58:50,506 Go on, fuck off! Fuck off, [indiscernible]. Oh, for fuck's sake. 590 00:58:50,735 --> 00:58:51,882 Go on, fuck off! 591 00:58:55,010 --> 00:58:56,209 Fucking hell! 592 00:58:56,522 --> 00:58:57,617 It's alright. 593 00:58:57,836 --> 00:58:58,972 Fuck off! 594 00:59:00,954 --> 00:59:03,873 So we sat around for a bit 595 00:59:05,959 --> 00:59:08,357 and decided we'd come out together. 596 00:59:13,570 --> 00:59:17,428 We're coming out now. We're together. 597 00:59:19,201 --> 00:59:20,504 I'm sorry. 598 00:59:23,580 --> 00:59:24,727 Go! Get him! 599 00:59:28,898 --> 00:59:30,462 Connie, just shoot the fucker! 600 00:59:34,633 --> 00:59:39,503 He just lost it. It's not Stuart. 601 00:59:41,776 --> 00:59:43,496 Move! Move! 602 01:00:46,059 --> 01:00:48,665 Lovely stay, Alexander. Thank you very much. 603 01:00:49,447 --> 01:00:51,220 I really enjoyed it. 604 01:00:55,944 --> 01:01:00,646 I was really surprised, Alexander, to be honest. 605 01:01:00,761 --> 01:01:05,010 I thought that middle class people had something wrong with them, you know? 606 01:01:05,166 --> 01:01:11,501 But they're just ordinary, aren't they? I was a bit shocked, to tell the truth. 607 01:01:15,880 --> 01:01:18,904 Over the next few months Stuart's trial for the attempted manslaughter 608 01:01:18,905 --> 01:01:22,866 of his not poofter, boing-boing-whoosh bed making neighbour was postponed once, 609 01:01:24,430 --> 01:01:25,682 twice, 610 01:01:27,767 --> 01:01:29,488 a third time, 611 01:01:30,426 --> 01:01:31,729 and then a fourth. 612 01:01:35,613 --> 01:01:40,269 He needed some cash so I gave him 250 quid for his car 613 01:01:40,280 --> 01:01:42,678 and I'm still waiting for the paperwork. 614 01:01:43,981 --> 01:01:46,953 Meanwhile, the campaign went from strength to strength. 615 01:01:47,526 --> 01:01:51,019 Newsletters, petitions, protests, even benefit gigs. 616 01:01:51,124 --> 01:01:54,825 And then it was Stuart's bright idea to go and see our local MP. 617 01:01:56,963 --> 01:01:58,527 Oh shit. 618 01:02:03,459 --> 01:02:06,139 I'm sorry, I'm just a bit nervous is all. 619 01:02:10,414 --> 01:02:12,291 Mr Shorter is not from Anne's constituency� 620 01:02:12,296 --> 01:02:16,764 I'm from Anne's constituency. I wish to take Stuart as my guest. 621 01:02:16,765 --> 01:02:17,921 Alexander... 622 01:02:17,922 --> 01:02:19,329 For that you'll have to make a new appointment. 623 01:02:19,330 --> 01:02:21,258 Oh, rubbish! She's got nothing else to do, has she? 624 01:02:22,040 --> 01:02:27,775 The council is not gonna have no emergency winter shelter for the homeless. 625 01:02:29,495 --> 01:02:32,206 And I'm frightened� 626 01:02:36,847 --> 01:02:40,757 In winter it's smack what keeps you fucking� 627 01:02:46,596 --> 01:02:48,056 I'm sorry. 628 01:02:49,724 --> 01:02:51,080 �keeps you warm. 629 01:02:52,226 --> 01:02:58,535 But this year there's going to be one more death a month, again. 630 01:03:00,464 --> 01:03:01,402 Why? 631 01:03:02,758 --> 01:03:04,061 Puppies. 632 01:03:05,365 --> 01:03:07,450 I'm not sure I follow you. 633 01:03:08,910 --> 01:03:10,474 On the streets. 634 01:03:13,602 --> 01:03:15,166 Pup�puppies. 635 01:03:21,579 --> 01:03:25,176 'Cause the homeless love their dogs, right? 636 01:03:26,532 --> 01:03:31,224 But the hostels only allow two to three places for pets. 637 01:03:31,849 --> 01:03:36,959 So, if there has been two new litters, 638 01:03:37,219 --> 01:03:40,242 then loads more people are gonna have dogs, aren't they? 639 01:03:40,243 --> 01:03:46,239 And therefore will be forced to sleep out. 640 01:03:46,447 --> 01:03:54,893 And hence... therefore... furthermore, more deaths. 641 01:03:59,898 --> 01:04:06,050 You see, on the street it's the little things that kill people. 642 01:04:15,252 --> 01:04:19,084 That Justice Howarth must hate the campaign's guts. Humiliation! 643 01:04:19,136 --> 01:04:22,890 Seven months after they were sent down Ruth and John� 644 01:04:22,891 --> 01:04:27,092 �have been released on bail after a high profile campaign by MPs 645 01:04:27,093 --> 01:04:30,250 and other homeless charities, they won the right to appeal against prison sentences 646 01:04:30,252 --> 01:04:32,327 four and five years. 647 01:04:32,337 --> 01:04:36,288 This was our first sight of Ruth Wyner and John Brock on the steps of the 648 01:04:36,289 --> 01:04:38,479 Royal Courts of Justice this morning. 649 01:04:38,583 --> 01:04:42,179 After seven months in jail, the so-called "Cambridge Two" have been released on 650 01:04:42,180 --> 01:04:46,455 unconditional bail and are now free to challenge their original convictions. 651 01:04:47,863 --> 01:04:49,636 I can't see if the light's on. 652 01:04:52,972 --> 01:04:56,308 Stuart, it's Alexander. Stop whatever illegal thing it is 653 01:04:56,309 --> 01:04:58,415 that you're doing and get down here! 654 01:05:12,575 --> 01:05:15,182 It's me muscular dystrophy. 655 01:05:17,163 --> 01:05:23,419 Humeroscapu... or something. Muscular dystrophy. 656 01:05:25,505 --> 01:05:28,789 It's a real gobstopper, I never learnt the name. 657 01:05:29,988 --> 01:05:31,970 What you don't know can't hurt you. 658 01:05:33,117 --> 01:05:40,936 I only came in to see the nurse because I wanted a cuddle and it spits too soon. 659 01:05:40,937 --> 01:05:42,709 Stuart! 660 01:05:43,700 --> 01:05:47,714 I thought maybe it's because of me muscular dystrophy. 661 01:05:48,444 --> 01:05:51,573 You know, 'cause your dick's a muscle, isn't it? 662 01:05:56,578 --> 01:05:58,871 It started on me ticker. 663 01:06:00,957 --> 01:06:06,275 They tried twice to put a pacemaker in me tit, 664 01:06:08,777 --> 01:06:13,574 but the veins just crumble 'cause of the amount of critic I've injected. 665 01:06:15,972 --> 01:06:18,474 Gotta laugh, haven't you? 666 01:06:33,802 --> 01:06:35,387 I can't believe he hadn't told you. 667 01:06:35,992 --> 01:06:38,484 He tells everyone. About everything. 668 01:06:38,547 --> 01:06:40,945 - Well, now, that's not true. - Mum, yes. 669 01:06:41,570 --> 01:06:44,646 That's his way of coping, isn't it? 670 01:06:44,751 --> 01:06:47,357 Twenty years. Non-stop. 671 01:06:48,296 --> 01:06:50,069 Ever since he first went on the streets. 672 01:06:50,590 --> 01:06:52,050 Twenty years? 673 01:06:52,623 --> 01:06:56,220 But I thought it was Gavvy's, um, his brother's suicide that made him homeless. 674 01:06:56,231 --> 01:06:58,097 Don't be stupid. 675 01:06:58,306 --> 01:07:01,330 Stuart had been on and off the streets since he was twelve. 676 01:07:01,434 --> 01:07:03,519 Then, all of a sudden, this little horror. 677 01:07:04,093 --> 01:07:06,491 Twelve years old, that's when it started. 678 01:07:07,690 --> 01:07:09,359 Gavvy had to run to fetch mum. 679 01:07:11,340 --> 01:07:13,112 Come, it's Stuart! 680 01:07:13,947 --> 01:07:16,605 Put me into care! You hear me!? 681 01:07:16,762 --> 01:07:19,160 Do it now otherwise I'll kill you! 682 01:07:19,264 --> 01:07:24,374 Put me into care now! I'll do the lot of you! Put me into care! 683 01:07:24,375 --> 01:07:27,606 I said, put me into care! 684 01:07:28,857 --> 01:07:30,526 In you get. Watch your head. 685 01:07:32,090 --> 01:07:34,019 He was taken into care that night. 686 01:07:34,790 --> 01:07:36,208 We didn't see him for three weeks. 687 01:07:36,417 --> 01:07:38,085 Another one for you, Mr Laverack. 688 01:07:38,242 --> 01:07:41,161 You're getting popular, he asked to come. 689 01:07:42,360 --> 01:07:45,259 Poor boy. Poor boy. 690 01:07:57,428 --> 01:07:59,304 Out of the frying pan into the fire. 691 01:07:59,513 --> 01:08:01,703 Well, we weren't the frying pan. 692 01:08:01,755 --> 01:08:03,058 You know what I mean. 693 01:08:03,997 --> 01:08:05,561 We just couldn't understand it. 694 01:08:06,916 --> 01:08:08,720 People said she ought to disown him. 695 01:08:10,044 --> 01:08:12,130 How can you wash your hands of your own child? 696 01:08:13,277 --> 01:08:14,945 He's my flesh and blood, I'd say. 697 01:08:16,196 --> 01:08:17,343 He's my son. 698 01:08:17,552 --> 01:08:19,689 I just wish I could do more. 699 01:08:22,453 --> 01:08:26,231 Working on the book after the end of the campaign, writing, rewriting, 700 01:08:26,232 --> 01:08:30,440 I realised then that I could never hope to justify or explain Stuart. 701 01:08:30,461 --> 01:08:33,537 And whatever had murdered his innocence had long ago ceased 702 01:08:33,538 --> 01:08:36,112 to be simple enough to sort out with words. 703 01:08:37,259 --> 01:08:39,814 All I could hope to do was to staple him to the page. 704 01:08:45,835 --> 01:08:47,895 - Hello? - It's in me tit. 705 01:08:48,207 --> 01:08:52,900 I'm at Papworth Heart Hospital. Come visit. 706 01:08:54,047 --> 01:08:59,041 Yeah, on your way, can you pop in to see me gran and grandpa? 707 01:08:59,052 --> 01:09:00,824 They've got a present for me. 708 01:09:01,033 --> 01:09:04,682 I told them it smells like sick but they don't listen. 709 01:09:13,858 --> 01:09:15,944 We haven't seen Stuart in years. 710 01:09:16,308 --> 01:09:17,820 Lots of years. 711 01:09:18,185 --> 01:09:22,096 Well, things haven't been very easy for him recently. 712 01:09:22,200 --> 01:09:24,911 His mother says it's the buses. 713 01:09:25,328 --> 01:09:27,153 They're not convenient. 714 01:09:33,461 --> 01:09:34,295 Stuart? 715 01:09:34,712 --> 01:09:39,300 - No. - Rory, his son. 716 01:09:46,703 --> 01:09:49,832 - Stuart. - No. 717 01:09:49,884 --> 01:09:51,813 Rex, his dad. 718 01:09:53,846 --> 01:09:56,192 A bad man, his real dad. 719 01:09:57,860 --> 01:09:59,633 Gypsies. 720 01:10:07,766 --> 01:10:09,017 Stuart? 721 01:10:09,122 --> 01:10:10,999 Gavvy, Stuey's brother. 722 01:10:11,311 --> 01:10:15,534 One day when Rex was beating our Judith real bad, 723 01:10:16,994 --> 01:10:18,923 Gavvy hit him over the head with a broom. 724 01:10:19,549 --> 01:10:21,113 He was only five. 725 01:10:23,303 --> 01:10:25,732 Rex moved out after that. 726 01:10:30,706 --> 01:10:32,635 I know why Stuart changed. 727 01:10:34,147 --> 01:10:36,754 Gavvy came 'round special to tell me. 728 01:10:38,318 --> 01:10:39,986 Promised I'd never tell. 729 01:10:43,323 --> 01:10:46,200 Three days later he committed suicide. 730 01:10:52,394 --> 01:10:54,302 To celebrate his getting better. 731 01:10:55,314 --> 01:10:57,123 Couldn't decide red or white. 732 01:10:57,264 --> 01:11:01,257 Tell him to come and see us. We've waited long enough. 733 01:11:02,300 --> 01:11:04,802 Can't wait forever. 734 01:11:24,979 --> 01:11:27,169 Oh, you fucking star. 735 01:11:43,487 --> 01:11:45,312 I almost died. 736 01:11:50,473 --> 01:11:53,184 How are Ruth and John? 737 01:11:53,554 --> 01:11:55,322 Not good. 738 01:11:57,543 --> 01:11:58,606 He can't work. 739 01:12:00,900 --> 01:12:02,360 Wife says he cries in his sleep. 740 01:12:07,678 --> 01:12:08,825 And Ruth? 741 01:12:09,138 --> 01:12:10,285 Got cancer. 742 01:12:14,143 --> 01:12:15,394 Bastards. 743 01:12:16,541 --> 01:12:19,043 Now do you see what I mean about the system? 744 01:12:19,262 --> 01:12:22,484 The system. It's the system that's going to keep her alive. 745 01:12:23,110 --> 01:12:27,698 It's the system that's just given you a �5,000 pacemaker for nothing. 746 01:12:28,845 --> 01:12:31,608 - Hello? - Excuse me guys, do either of you know where the toilet is? 747 01:12:31,869 --> 01:12:34,163 Uh, yeah, sure. I saw a sign that said down there on the left. 748 01:12:34,371 --> 01:12:35,622 Thanks, mate. 749 01:12:45,320 --> 01:12:46,727 Fucking hell. 750 01:12:47,457 --> 01:12:49,438 I need a cigarette. 751 01:12:51,576 --> 01:12:54,026 Yeah, the whole town's like it. 752 01:12:54,913 --> 01:12:56,998 All cripples. 753 01:12:58,145 --> 01:13:02,498 I spent six years in a school like this. 754 01:13:06,382 --> 01:13:09,302 Day I end up like that, eh, 755 01:13:09,615 --> 01:13:12,743 death day. 756 01:13:14,098 --> 01:13:15,558 Care was like this? 757 01:13:15,767 --> 01:13:18,373 No. Spagie school. 758 01:13:18,895 --> 01:13:22,336 They sent me because of my muscular dystrophy. 759 01:13:23,274 --> 01:13:26,507 Said I wasn't allowed to go to proper school. 760 01:13:26,559 --> 01:13:28,748 Well, it was the '70s. 761 01:13:29,113 --> 01:13:32,460 Funny thing, that. There was nothing wrong with me at that stage. 762 01:13:32,462 --> 01:13:36,934 I was just a bit uncoordinated, but you'd hardly notice. 763 01:13:39,019 --> 01:13:42,356 But they said since I was going to die a spag, 764 01:13:42,361 --> 01:13:45,328 I might as well get used to the idea. 765 01:13:47,934 --> 01:13:51,480 Before I was too spagie to understand, I suppose. 766 01:13:51,481 --> 01:13:52,262 Now all together. 767 01:13:53,617 --> 01:13:55,911 Douchebag! Douchebag! Douchebag! 768 01:13:59,143 --> 01:14:01,854 Gimpy! Oi, gimpy, come here! 769 01:14:02,584 --> 01:14:04,774 Where's your brother now? 770 01:14:07,365 --> 01:14:10,196 'Help me! Hold me! Love me!' 771 01:14:15,597 --> 01:14:17,808 We're coming to kill you. 772 01:14:31,676 --> 01:14:33,553 Did they kick the shit out of you? 773 01:14:33,970 --> 01:14:35,638 Every day, mate. 774 01:14:37,098 --> 01:14:39,809 Give 'em something to do after school. 775 01:14:42,103 --> 01:14:44,293 Then Gavvy would console me. 776 01:14:47,421 --> 01:14:51,696 Please, not Howarth. Please, not� 777 01:14:51,697 --> 01:14:55,345 Only one month out of Papworth, Stuart's day in court for 778 01:14:55,346 --> 01:14:57,744 attempting to cut off his neighbour's head finally arrived. 779 01:14:58,474 --> 01:15:00,653 We were dreading it would be Ruth and John's old judge. 780 01:15:00,663 --> 01:15:02,749 Oh fuck! 781 01:15:03,166 --> 01:15:05,460 All rise for Justice Howarth. 782 01:15:08,067 --> 01:15:10,725 At this point Stuart really was looking at being imprisoned for life. 783 01:15:15,678 --> 01:15:17,972 Court is now in session. 784 01:15:25,480 --> 01:15:29,807 This case concerns Stuart Clive Shorter. 785 01:15:32,570 --> 01:15:37,591 Affray, disorderly conduct, resisting arrest, 786 01:15:37,627 --> 01:15:40,860 an incident at the accused's flat. 787 01:15:55,823 --> 01:15:59,576 No. No, he just said the whole thing was nonsense. 788 01:16:00,515 --> 01:16:04,685 All that adding charges, taking them away, attempted murder, not� 789 01:16:04,686 --> 01:16:06,927 I don't know, I mean, what can I say? 790 01:16:06,980 --> 01:16:10,890 The lucky bastard got off on a series of technicalities. 791 01:16:11,098 --> 01:16:14,070 You know what Judge Howarth thinks about� 792 01:16:14,075 --> 01:16:17,824 Oh shit. Stuart, I'm so sorry. Are you alright? 793 01:16:18,137 --> 01:16:19,492 I'm so sorry. 794 01:16:22,724 --> 01:16:26,218 He's free! He's absolutely fucking free. 795 01:16:59,636 --> 01:17:01,305 Oh, you're disgusting. 796 01:17:05,684 --> 01:17:07,770 Wakey, wakey. 797 01:17:14,547 --> 01:17:19,031 Sun has got his hat on, mate. Sun has got his hat on, mate. 798 01:17:19,865 --> 01:17:21,690 Rise and shine! 799 01:17:21,877 --> 01:17:24,922 Now, I've got to try on a suit for me sister's wedding. 800 01:17:25,277 --> 01:17:27,372 Can you give me a lift? 801 01:17:38,321 --> 01:17:39,885 Have you listened to the tape? 802 01:17:57,611 --> 01:18:02,929 I was nine, Alexander, when it started. Nine. 803 01:18:05,014 --> 01:18:07,022 It was three years of abuse. 804 01:18:08,716 --> 01:18:10,749 My own brother. 805 01:18:16,067 --> 01:18:19,247 And then his mate joined in. 806 01:18:28,788 --> 01:18:34,127 That night, I ju� I couldn't, I couldn't take it no more, you know? 807 01:18:36,608 --> 01:18:38,089 They had done everything. 808 01:18:43,177 --> 01:18:46,097 There was nothing more they could do. 809 01:19:13,416 --> 01:19:17,430 - You got any more of these? - Yeah, backseat, I think. 810 01:19:18,630 --> 01:19:20,924 I think the reason mum still pampers him like she does 811 01:19:20,925 --> 01:19:24,000 is because she feels guilty about what Gavvy did. 812 01:19:24,573 --> 01:19:26,763 But he did the same to me. 813 01:19:28,817 --> 01:19:30,110 I'm the same as Stu. 814 01:19:30,131 --> 01:19:33,540 One minute, nice as pie; next minute, I'm a rattlesnake. 815 01:19:35,313 --> 01:19:39,484 How'd I get to be like this? What murdered the little boy I was? 816 01:19:39,485 --> 01:19:42,007 When the police found Gavvy, they said he'd really suffered. 817 01:19:45,479 --> 01:19:46,887 Legs all over the show. 818 01:19:48,190 --> 01:19:50,172 That boy has suffered. 819 01:19:51,475 --> 01:19:53,039 Happy-go-lucky little thing. 820 01:19:53,248 --> 01:19:55,333 Mr Laverack. 821 01:19:55,906 --> 01:19:58,357 - Poor boy. Poor boy. - Out of the frying pan into the fire. 822 01:19:58,358 --> 01:20:01,381 - Put me into care now! - Douchebag! Douchebag! 823 01:20:01,485 --> 01:20:05,395 - Douchebag! Douchebag! Douchebag! - We're coming to kill you. 824 01:20:05,551 --> 01:20:09,733 The tablets he'd taken had eaten his kidneys and his liver away before he died. 825 01:20:09,734 --> 01:20:12,329 Always such a caring boy. Happy-go-lucky little thing. 826 01:20:12,746 --> 01:20:14,727 And I'm glad. 827 01:20:14,936 --> 01:20:16,349 I'm glad Gavvy suffered. 828 01:20:25,389 --> 01:20:27,083 That's Gavvy. 829 01:20:31,697 --> 01:20:33,830 That's Gavvy and me. 830 01:20:39,857 --> 01:20:42,067 So he's what murdered the boy you were. 831 01:20:44,549 --> 01:20:47,510 - What made you change. - Ah, wasn't that. 832 01:20:50,388 --> 01:20:51,587 What was it then? 833 01:20:53,829 --> 01:21:00,294 So many people have had the same sort of childhood and experiences 834 01:21:00,295 --> 01:21:05,434 as what I have and they learn to accept and cope and live a very, 835 01:21:06,550 --> 01:21:10,403 in brackets, "normal and competitive life". 836 01:21:10,408 --> 01:21:13,432 I'm quite philosophical about that. 837 01:21:18,541 --> 01:21:21,148 If you had to change one thing about your life, what would it be? 838 01:21:21,669 --> 01:21:23,807 Well, how much is one thing? 839 01:21:24,797 --> 01:21:27,926 It's very easy to blame, isn't it? 840 01:21:29,594 --> 01:21:31,992 Me muscular dystrophy? 841 01:21:32,931 --> 01:21:34,599 Nonces? 842 01:21:35,224 --> 01:21:36,580 Gavvy? 843 01:21:38,353 --> 01:21:40,793 Honestly, it'd be easier to change me. 844 01:21:42,002 --> 01:21:43,358 One thing only. 845 01:21:51,491 --> 01:21:54,640 The day I discovered violence. 846 01:21:56,600 --> 01:21:58,581 Me step-father 847 01:21:58,790 --> 01:22:02,335 said if I didn't go out there and stick up for myself, 848 01:22:02,856 --> 01:22:04,942 he'd belt us once. 849 01:22:40,185 --> 01:22:43,105 Fucking fantastic. 850 01:22:47,171 --> 01:22:49,361 Weakling became strong. 851 01:22:50,821 --> 01:22:53,636 The day that I found violence 852 01:22:54,575 --> 01:22:57,651 I felt fifty times more strong. 853 01:22:59,684 --> 01:23:06,044 After you've been bullied and pushed about, called spastic, 854 01:23:06,097 --> 01:23:15,299 you learn that violence, and fear of violence, and madness, it scares people. 855 01:23:17,410 --> 01:23:22,624 I used to deliberately get myself in a rage. 856 01:23:22,832 --> 01:23:27,733 And after six months, I found I couldn't stop them. 857 01:23:28,046 --> 01:23:31,539 I wasn't making the madness up no more. 858 01:23:35,136 --> 01:23:37,639 You know what, Alexander? 859 01:23:40,350 --> 01:23:43,582 I don't know myself or [indiscernible]. 860 01:23:45,355 --> 01:23:46,606 Madness. 861 01:23:47,753 --> 01:23:52,132 Sometimes I think I'm the child of the devil. 862 01:23:53,123 --> 01:23:55,469 I let the devil in. 863 01:23:58,284 --> 01:24:00,578 Now I can't get him out. 864 01:24:02,247 --> 01:24:04,019 I tried... 865 01:24:04,540 --> 01:24:08,013 burning him out, and cutting him out, and... 866 01:24:10,484 --> 01:24:12,674 he don't take no notice. 867 01:24:13,404 --> 01:24:14,655 Why should he? 868 01:24:14,968 --> 01:24:17,809 He don't wanna be homeless. 869 01:24:30,087 --> 01:24:31,536 You know, there's still one question left. 870 01:24:31,557 --> 01:24:34,571 - What's that, mate? - Guess. 871 01:24:35,676 --> 01:24:37,751 We're writing the book backwards, 872 01:24:39,054 --> 01:24:42,182 so what's the last bit of information we need? 873 01:24:45,832 --> 01:24:47,604 What's your date of birth? 874 01:24:48,021 --> 01:24:50,107 Oh, right, yeah. 875 01:24:51,775 --> 01:24:54,518 I am Stuart Clive Shorter. 876 01:24:55,425 --> 01:25:01,942 I was born on the 19th of the 9th, 1968. 877 01:25:05,748 --> 01:25:07,937 So, you're... 878 01:25:08,876 --> 01:25:14,402 - You're 33. - I am 33. I'm getting older, as they say. 879 01:25:15,236 --> 01:25:22,587 And I have led a very controversial and unpleasant life. 880 01:25:25,017 --> 01:25:26,706 Oh, yeah. 881 01:25:28,791 --> 01:25:33,067 Eh? Best man or what, eh? 882 01:25:38,384 --> 01:25:40,783 It is gonna be grand. 883 01:26:05,182 --> 01:26:07,372 P�P�P�Peterborough, Cambridge� 884 01:26:10,187 --> 01:26:17,486 �on 96 and 95.7 FM. And 1026 AM. BBC Radio Cambridgeshire. 885 01:26:17,799 --> 01:26:19,050 The top story this hour� 886 01:26:27,183 --> 01:26:29,321 �near the French entrance to the channel tunnel. 887 01:26:29,373 --> 01:26:32,397 Police have now formally indentified the man who died after being hit 888 01:26:32,398 --> 01:26:35,108 by a train near Cambridge early this morning. 889 01:26:35,525 --> 01:26:38,663 He was Stuart Shorter, a 33-year-old from Waterbeach. 890 01:26:38,664 --> 01:26:43,866 The coroner has been informed and an inquest will take place at a date to be fixed. 891 01:26:56,379 --> 01:26:58,464 Judith? It's Alexander. 892 01:27:04,199 --> 01:27:07,953 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. 893 01:27:08,005 --> 01:27:10,007 Was it suicide? 894 01:27:10,873 --> 01:27:13,401 I don't know. He didn't leave a note. 895 01:27:14,731 --> 01:27:17,233 But then, suicides often don't. 896 01:27:18,484 --> 01:27:23,072 All I do know is that he stepped in front of the 11:15 Cambridge to Kings Lynn. 897 01:27:24,219 --> 01:27:28,703 �I have overcome the world, says the Lord. 898 01:27:28,859 --> 01:27:32,978 Since the Earthly life of Stuart has come to an end, 899 01:27:33,917 --> 01:27:36,836 we commit his body to be buried. 900 01:27:37,045 --> 01:27:41,215 Earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust. 901 01:27:41,320 --> 01:27:45,491 In sure and certain hope of the resurrection to eternal life. 902 01:27:45,595 --> 01:27:49,557 - To our Lord Jesus Christ, Amen. - Amen. 903 01:28:46,385 --> 01:28:48,992 Hello, Alexander. It's Stuart. 904 01:28:49,002 --> 01:28:50,973 Hello, Stuart. 905 01:28:51,077 --> 01:28:59,419 You know, admitting I've had lots to drink and that, but I can't help reflect about my brother 906 01:29:00,253 --> 01:29:02,443 and my brother's friend. 907 01:29:02,547 --> 01:29:04,632 And they didn't believe me. 908 01:29:05,675 --> 01:29:07,656 And they didn't care. 909 01:29:07,760 --> 01:29:09,324 The abuse. 910 01:29:09,846 --> 01:29:14,413 Being asked to do things that I wouldn't have thought possible that anyone 911 01:29:14,414 --> 01:29:17,385 could ask of an 11-year-old. 912 01:29:20,273 --> 01:29:29,657 I'm just head-butting, and head-butting, and head-butting, and head-butting. 913 01:29:29,814 --> 01:29:34,871 The more that you speak, the more they disbelieve. 914 01:29:35,914 --> 01:29:39,354 And nobody was listening to anything I had to say. 915 01:29:40,606 --> 01:29:43,202 When I've got my drink inside me 916 01:29:43,212 --> 01:29:48,739 I sit here having mad conversations with myself. 917 01:29:49,052 --> 01:29:51,877 Talking about mutilating myself, 918 01:29:52,962 --> 01:29:55,725 killing myself, 919 01:29:56,768 --> 01:29:59,896 tracking down those who are responsible. 920 01:30:00,939 --> 01:30:05,109 I want to just lay down and die. 921 01:30:07,195 --> 01:30:11,470 I feel so dirty, and fucking horrible 922 01:30:11,501 --> 01:30:15,849 and hating and attacking anyone I get close to. 923 01:30:17,153 --> 01:30:18,665 I just wish 924 01:30:20,229 --> 01:30:21,688 once 925 01:30:21,793 --> 01:30:25,964 there could be an escape from this madness. 926 01:30:40,561 --> 01:30:44,315 The book was finally published in April 2005. 927 01:30:48,173 --> 01:30:50,467 I think Stuart would have liked it. 74898

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