Original subtitles

DRE: I love that Junior and I are working together...

Hey, come on, son. Let's go.

...because our relationship hasn't always been great.

♪

First up is the throat chop.

- Bah! - [Chokes]

If that fails, always go for the groin.

- That's like the balls of the balls. - [Grunts]

But now I'm looking out for him in new ways.

I ordered wrong.

Yes, you did.

Don't worry. I got you.

Hey!

Ooh! Beets!

Notice how you hear Dennis Haysbert's voice

before you see him.

Studies have proven

that hearing a person before you see them

builds trust.

Man.

- Haysbert is the GOAT! - Mm-hmm.

[Chuckles]

We've been through some rough waters,

but I finally feel like we turned a corner.

Oh, hey. Hey, hey.

Pop that collar.

All right.

Dre and Junior.

Getting along.

- Mm-hmm. - [Laughs]

It's not gonna last.

Yep. They're doomed.

Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx www.addic7ed.com

♪

That morning, Junior and I hit up a prospective client

with the old Johnson shake and bake.

We were so in sync,

it was as natural as Colin Kaepernick's afro.

Mm-hmm.

We really like this direction.

I can't wait to hear the full pitch.

Mm.

I know from the social media side,

we're all really excited.

Hey, well, you know what? That was all Junior.

- [Chuckles] - He brought it home. [Pats back]

Well, I couldn't have brought it home

if you hadn't already built the house.

Okay. You know what, son?

Why don't you give them some more details

as you walk them out?

- You got it, big guy. - All right.

- Nice meeting you. - Nice to meet you.

- Thank you, guys. Thanks for coming. - Pleasure.

Ah.

Wasn't Junior great? We were a well-oiled machine!

Uh, yeah, Junior was good. He was good. But, um...

But what?

Well, you've been helping him a lot, Dre.

We've all noticed that you've been daddy-ing him.

What? Daddy-ing?

The boy is latched to your work teat, Dre.

No, he's not.

The boy is standing on his own.

I'm just supporting a colleague.

It is a slap in the face for all those people, like my son,

who worked their asses off to get here.

Where is Connor?

Uh, there was a cricket outside of his apartment door,

- so I gave him the day off. - Mm.

Anywho, look, you know how I love it

when we all attack Dre, like the time

that he accidentally told us that his wife out-earns him.

[Both laugh]

But, yes, you know, I got to give it to you, Dre.

It was a great pitch.

So, let's give it an hour,

and we'll follow up with the client.

Okay, you know, I think Junior should be the one to do that.

Of course you do.

Your teat is exposed, Dre.

Okay, you know what?

If you want him to follow up, that's fine,

but try not to be so flagrant with your daddy-ing, okay?

'Cause it's, um... it's unbecoming.

- [Cellphone chimes] - Oh, brother.

Now there are two crickets outside his door.

I got to save my little pumpkin.

Uh-huh.

A Bulbasaur?

Oh, I'm sorry. I don't know how that got in there.

Damn it, Jack. This is the Pomona tourney.

There's no messing around.

All the big hitters are gonna be there.

Do I look scared?

Jackachu pulled three new cards

that are gonna put us over the top.

[Sighs]

Jack?

A word?

[Sighs] Here.

Really?

What? Me and Mason play Pokémon all the time.

It's not a big deal.

Do you remember what happened to Elise Sanders?

She got caught with a doll in her locker

and went from the queen of the school

to a lonely person that uses Drake lyrics

in all of her Instagram captions.

I think she was just sad because her grandma died.

The only thing that died was her relevance.

It's eighth grade, friend.

The stakes are too high.

Choose wisely.

[Sighs]

Hey, Diane.

Do you play Pokémon?

I don't play anything.

Once we win Pomona, she'll respect me.

He...

Oh...

Mm.

Eh...

Pops, do you need something?

It's okay. You're working. I-I don't want to bother you.

Listen, I found Lynette's robe,

and I don't know what to do with it.

I thought I could give it to a homeless person

near where she lives.

That way, she'd see it every day.

I don't know. What do you think?

Well, uh...

I think this is a great opportunity

for you to find closure.

I mean, you could send the robe back with a note,

let her know that despite everything that happened,

you're the bigger person.

- Huh. - Mm-hmm.

- I didn't think of that. - Mm.

That way, I won't have to explain to my next lady

why the robe has an "L" on the front.

There you go.

- I knew I could trust you, Rainbow. - Ohh!

You're the only sensible one 'round here.

[Chuckles] Thank you.

I think I'm the only sensible one around here, too.

The next morning, it was still bothering me.

Was I really daddy-ing my son?

Hey, babe, it's not my fault

that Junior is thriving under my superior tutelage.

[Chuckles] I never favored him.

Yeah.

If anything, you have an unfortunate history

of tearing him down.

- Exactly. - Yes.

Okay? I am just his mentor, all right?

A guide as he climbs the ad ladder.

- Babe, he is a natural at this. - Okay.

- Oh. Hey. - Hey, sweetheart.

Son, you ready to go?

Actually, I'm gonna catch my own ride.

I set up a meeting with Marie at the coffee shop

next to the office to discuss a last-minute idea

to enhance the pitch for the CEO.

Oh. All right. Do your thing, then, son.

I'll see you at work.

- You see that, Bow? - Yeah, I see it.

A natural.

Together, with our powers combined,

we... we could go on to great things, babe.

Forget Stevens & Lido.

- Oh. - Anything is possible.

[Ragtime music plays]

♪

We're gonna sell so many kinds of meat.

That's how all your fantasies end.

With Bow's advice in my head,

I confidently brought Junior the tablet he had forgotten...

and a jacket because the forecast was a little chilly.

But when I arrived,

Junior was already doing his thing.

A thing I wish I had not seen.

♪

I had to confront Junior, but since we were at work,

I needed to tread lightly.

Junior, what is going on with you and Marie?

Oh. She really liked my idea.

Yeah, I know she liked it so much

that you were making out with her this morning.

- Oooh! - Oooh!

What the hell were you thinking,

kissing your client in public?

What?! You made out with Marie?

- My man! - [Chuckles]

What? You guys... You guys are cool with this?

I'm the one who told him to take Marie to my favorite date spot.

I like any place where you can pay in pennies.

You are just now starting your career,

and this is the type of thing that can give you a reputation.

- A reputation of gettin' that ass. - Get that ass!

Come on, Dad.

If this happened to Josh or Charlie,

you wouldn't have a problem with it.

Okay, first of all, this would have never happened to Josh.

Son, you have to learn how to keep your relationships

between you and your client professional.

What your father's trying to say is...

wrap that thing up.

I don't see any rule against dating clients.

Oh, thank God.

Otherwise, if there were,

this place would've been shut down a long time ago.

Son, the hell with a rulebook. It's stupid.

I'm telling you to break it off with her.

- Why? - Stop talking back!

I'm your father, and I say so.

Hold up. I'm old enough to make my own choices.

And we're fine. We're going to a Young Thug concert.

We're cool!

You're taking her to see the King of Slime?

Yup. And Ray J's gonna be handing out hot dogs there.

- But, son... - But nothing!

Just let me do my own thing.

Try being my boss and not my dad.

What about all our plans?

[Somber ragtime music plays]

♪

All that meat... gone to waste.

This is why I'm glad I never had a son.

Eustace!

♪

[Laughter]

Oh, man, Jack, the team's just not the same without you.

You know, you should come to a game.

Yeah.

Uh... cool.

Maybe.

Jackachu! We won!

Not now, Mason.

But half of these pocket monsters are yours.

No. No!

Charizard! No!

- Uh... - Pokémon?

W-What are you? 7?

[Whispering] Save yourself.

Yeah, are you some kind of baby?

Does your grandma still wash you in the sink?

Hey, I bet his favorite movie's "Detective Pikachu."

[Laughter]

We saw that opening night together.

Uh, yeah, right.

I was smoking cigarettes that night.

[Scoffs]

Congratulations, Jack.

You've run your first friendship through the garbage disposal.

Proud of you.

Ah.

Dre! That Townsend project is way over budget!

They are gonna have your ass!

[Sighs]

Sorry for the theatrics.

I-I just can't let the office know

that I'm... I'm here for some real talk.

Now, look... I saw what happened, okay?

You have to let Junior learn from his own mistakes.

What?

It's gonna be hard at first, but it'll be worth it.

Otherwise, your son's gonna turn out like Connor, okay?

I babied him for so long.

He's practically a house cat.

When I paid his college tuition,

he thanked me by presenting me with a dead bird.

Okay.

Junior and Connor are not the same.

It's not the actions of the son you need to worry about.

It's... It's those of the father.

Who knows how Connor would've turned out

if I had let him take his own SATs,

his own entrance exams or drug tests.

You're right.

It wouldn't hurt for me to back off.

And if Junior falls, he needs to pick himself back up.

Thank you.

Hey, you know...

on your own, you're kind of helpful.

- [Chuckles] - [Cellphone chimes]

Oh.

Oh, gosh.

Connor's at a toll booth, and he has no idea what to do.

Got to go down to Orange County real quick.

Hang in there, puddin'.

- Hey, Rainbow. - Hey.

I just wanted to thank you.

Ohhh!

Did you write the letter to Lynette?

Yep. Managed to say how I felt and not use one profanity.

As long as she can't read through my cross-outs.

- Hey, Pops! - Yeah.

[Clicks tongue] Good for you!

I might write letters to all the ladies I know.

- Okay. Okay. [Chuckles] - [Chuckles]

- Uh, hey, Mom? - Yeah?

Can I ask you something?

Only if you want great advice.

Okay.

Uh...

well...

the basketball team made fun of Mason,

- and I joined in. - Ohh.

I threw my friend under the bus so they would like me.

Does that make me a terrible person?

No!

You are not a terrible person.

Jack... you're in eighth grade now.

The stakes are high, and you're gonna need friends.

But if you want my advice, it's important that you...

Call Mason to apologize?

No.

Survive.

What?

Kids are ruthless in eighth grade.

It's not worth a slip-up, Jack. It's dog-eat-dog.

I remember when I was your age.

I ate chili cheese fries, and they did not sit well.

And then later that day in science class...

All I'll say is that my friend Michelle Stankowsky smelt it.

But it was I...

- No, Mom. - Yes, Jack.

It was I who dealt it.

And I let her take the fall.

And you've regretted it ever since, right?

No!

It was the best decision of my life, Jack.

You got to stay one step ahead!

You got to look out for number one, and that was me,

and I made it out alive.

I'm a doctor, and they still call her "Stank."

[Gasps] This story makes my stomach hurt.

Mine, too.

Wait.

I think I get what you're trying to do.

You're showing me the worst possible way to handle this

so I can see what I did wrong and make it right.

- Yep. - Mm-hmm.

That's exactly what I'm doing.

- [Inhales deeply] - Okay.

And you should apologize.

- Because it's the right thing to do. - Mm.

Mason is my friend, and I burned him for what?

A few minutes with the basketball team?

- [Inhales sharply] - Ugh.

I've got to make things right with the Marvelous Mr. Mason.

Yeah.

Oh, and what did Stank say when you apologized?

Mm?

Uh... uh...

I got to...

...go send an e-mail.

Oh.

Yeah.

Stevens' advice shook me.

I decided that it couldn't hurt to put up a boundary

to keep things professional with Junior.

Hey. You ready to knock this out of the box, son?

I mean "Junior."

Yeah, no. Uh... sure. I'm... I'm... I'm 100.

Hey. Come here for a second.

Are you okay?

- It's Marie. - Ah.

She didn't want to go to the Young Thug concert with me.

She doesn't want to hang out at all anymore.

I don't think I can do this, Dad.

Oh. Well, it's too bad nobody was there to warn you.

But we still need to close this account.

Dad, please...

So, now I'm your dad? Oh.

No, you wanted a boss, and you got a boss,

and your boss says, "Get in there and do your job."

Can't back out now.

Well, those are the numbers,

and if anything is ever a little off,

Charlie is skimming off the top.

[Laughter]

Why you snitchin', Dre?

Now to hear what we can do for your social media.

Junior.

Junior.

Uh, yes.

Yeah. Uh...

[Remote beeps]

Social media.

Social media can be a great thing,

like when you post a picture because you're excited

to go to a concert with a special someone.

But it can also be a bad thing...

when you have to delete that same picture

because that special someone rejected you.

Social media is...

- Social media is, uh... - Uh, Dre. No, no. Don't. Don't. Don't...

[Sighs]

You know what? Have a seat, Junior.

Uh, social media is just that...

social.

Uh, see, it's, uh, it's different.

Um... Facebook, hmm? Has all the faces.

- [Sighs] - [Chuckles]

Snapchat... [Snaps fingers]

You don't even have to snap to get that one started.

And, uh... a-and there's also Hotmail.

You've given us a lot to think about.

- Mm. - We'll be in touch.

Really?

[Chuckles] Well, they said they'll be in touch.

[Chuckles] We did it!

We are now in the mayo-nasty business.

♪

♪

Hey, Mason.

This is him?

Hi!

I've heard a lot about you.

Sasha is very protective.

I just wanted to say I'm sorry

for how I treated you in front of the team.

It was wrong.

Walk with me.

- Are you sure? - It's okay.

If you hurt him again, I'll hurt you.

Again, I'm sorry.

I loved "Detective Pikachu"!

Him wearing that little detective hat was hilarious.

Where did they find a hat that small?

It's CGI, Jack.

And you shunning me helped me find

a whole new group of people to play Pokémon with.

Girl people.

I want to play Pokémon with girl people.

Sorry, Jack. Gotta catch 'em all.

Mason's getting attention from girls?

Hmm. That doesn't make me feel anything at all.

I dealt with the fallout from the mayo pitch all day.

But I still couldn't laugh about it

by the time I told Bow.

So, you lost... a mayo account,

and you still think

that your job is as important as mine?

- Okay, this isn't funny, Bow. - Okay.

I don't know if I can balance

being Junior's dad and his boss at the same time.

Having him work there may be more trouble than it's worth.

No, Dre.

You can't throw this away.

You have what I have always wanted!

[Ragtime music plays]

♪

Back then... I could've been the first lady doctor.

That's how all your fantasies end.

- Look... Dre. - Hmm?

It's taken you this long to get to this place with Junior.

This is the best your relationship has ever been.

What? Are you gonna throw it away over one bad day?

Look, what if it's not just a bad day?

- What if it's a bad week? - So?

- What if it's a bad month? - So?

I don't know what to do, Bow. W-What would you do?

Oh! I am so glad that you asked!

- This is an easy one for me, Dre. - Mm-hmm?

- Talk to Junior! - [Sighs]

Figure this out!

Because I think he wants this to work out

just as badly as you do.

- You're right. - Mm-hmm.

That's... great advice.

Well, I know. I know.

And I do enjoy working with the boy.

Mm.

You know, kind of like...

when a dog is licking your face.

- What? - Sweet, yet disgusting.

♪

Hey!

There's my king of closure!

Ha ha!

Can I help you with anything else?

Hell no!

I'm not taking advice from you ever again.

Why? What happened?

Lynette got my package, and then she texted me to say

- that I came off sounding thirsty. - Oh.

Said I should've thrown the robe away

because she stole it from the Langham Hotel.

That explains the "L."

And she got the nerve to call me dramatic.

She got off a whole lot of emojis.

- Oh. - Really rubbed it in.

I feel worse now than I did when I found the robe.

Oh. Pops, I-I'm... I'm so sorry.

Well, you should be. You give terrible advice.

Now I got to go upload

shirtless pictures of myself on the Internet,

show people I'm not desperate.

Ah... Oh, I don't think that's a good i...

I don't want to hear it.

♪

Hey.

We need to talk.

I was expecting you.

So, am I fired?

No.

But I do have bad news.

I'm gonna always be your dad.

Why is that bad news?

Because I can't compartmentalize

being your father and being your boss,

and I know that's a problem for you.

No, Dad, stop. I'm the one who owes you an apology.

I realize now you weren't daddy-ing me.

- You were just looking out for me. - Mm.

I should've took your advice about Marie.

Yes, you should, because...

that meltdown was not a good look.

[Both laugh]

- Tell me about it. - Mm.

And I know I complain, but if I'm honest...

I love the perks of working with you.

- Mm. - I know that someone at my level

would never be allowed to pitch a client.

And the look on Josh's face when you gave me his fries?

- Mm-hmm. - I've never felt so powerful.

- [Chuckles] - And I will try to

respect our boundaries much better,

and if you fall, I'm gonna pick you up,

whether it's work or not.

Thanks, Dad.

[Both chuckle]

Now, I know we're at home,

but I got a work-related question.

Shoot.

Where does Charlie go when he says he's grabbing lunch

but he's gone for six hours?

[Chuckles]

Charlie has been trying to get on "The Price is Right"

for years now.

- Oh. - [Chuckles]

"Charlie Telphy! Come on down!"

[Both laugh]

Junior, your failed romance with the client

was just the wake-up call we needed

to update our code of conduct.

Now, does anybody have any requests before we finalize?

I want a waterbed for a desk.

Okay, Charlie, that doesn't fall under the code of conduct,

and you already have a waterbed.

I accidentally popped a hole in it

while making beats with my pencil.

- [Sighs] - Well, I want to codify

a rock-solid sexual harassment policy

so that everybody is super clear

about their rights in the workplace.

[Laughter]

CHARLIE: Good one, Junior.

Can we make it mandatory that when you have a birthday party,

you must invite all co-workers?

And can we change our dental plan

to include the installation and maintenance of grills?

I don't hear typing.

You s...

Type, little man.

♪♪