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Welcome back to Play Of The Week,
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where each week a new play
is performed live in front
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of a studio audience here in Cornley
and broadcast to the nation.
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I am Chris Bean...the director!
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Last week, you joined us
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00:00:27,880 --> 00:00:30,520
for our thrilling, unlicensed sequel
to War Horse,
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entitled More Horse.
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I'd like to thank all those
who wrote in with their complaints.
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The criticisms offered
were as artistically sound
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00:00:38,360 --> 00:00:40,200
as they were personally abusive.
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Needless to say, I will never again
be performing my Jamaican accent.
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So, tonight's piece
is a period romance.
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The actors are prepared,
the stage is set.
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Please enjoy Harper's Locket!
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CLONK!
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Bravo, Celeste!
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I always say you can get the measure
of a girl by seeing how well
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she swings a mallet.
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And I always say you can get
the measure of a man by seeing
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how often he insists
upon measuring ladies.
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Now, now, Celeste, be nice
to your fiance. Your turn, Edwin.
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CLONK!
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I don't know how you made that shot.
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There's a storm coming.
I can feel it in the air.
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Celeste! The sun is shining
and the sparrows are in flight.
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LOUD SQUAWKING
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How tranquil it is.
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Sparrows are so beautiful.
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I only wish they'd stay still
long enough for me to paint them.
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Go. Go.
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SQUAWKING
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Emily, how is your painting
coming along?
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It's very nearly finished, Father.
Well, I can't wait to see it.
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Where is your butler
with that lemonade?
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I asked him for it ten minutes ago.
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00:02:21,400 --> 00:02:23,000
If he was my man, I'd...
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If he was my man,
I'd have him flogged.
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Really, Edwin! I'd never dream
of harming a member of my staff.
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I grow weary of this game.
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Oh, just worried I'll win.
She's a coward, eh, Edwin?
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BANG!
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Excuse me.
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She certainly is a coward.
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But that shall all have to change
when we're married.
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Father, please can we go outside?
Not until we've had our lemonade.
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Ah! Here comes Smythe now.
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Thank you, Smythe.
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Delicious.
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Did Mrs Hargreaves make it?
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Did you? Bravo. Wonderful.
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Shake my hand.
Don't shake my hand, in fact.
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Just, er, open the wine cellar,
will you?
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In fact, don't. It's unlocked.
On your way. What a good man.
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I made the lemonade!
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Thank you.
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Shall we go inside? But we haven't
seen Emily's painting yet.
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Oh, yes, Emily. Do show us
your latest masterpiece.
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Oh, Emily, it's marvellous.
It is the very likeness of us.
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And you've included a frog.
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Yes. It's the only thing
I know how to paint.
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What a talent.
Let's head inside. Mm.
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Celeste?
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Cele...?
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Ohhh, come on!
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Celeste, aren't you coming in?
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I'm sorry, Father.
Celeste!
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You seem most distra...
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..most distracted this afternoon.
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Do I?
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What do you think of Edwin?
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He is a fine gentleman.
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And a splendid match.
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He seems very keen on you. I'm sure
you'll be most happy with him.
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And he with my dowry.
Please, Celeste!
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You know I'm not long
for this world...
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00:04:32,080 --> 00:04:33,920
TERRIBLE COUGHING FIT
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..weak and drawn.
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EVEN WORSE COUGHING FIT
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This wicked illness grips tighter
upon my lungs each day.
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FEEBLE COUGH
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Please, Papa, you must rest.
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But if you drive away the baron,
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who shall care for you
after I've passed?
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I shall care for myself.
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Don't be ridiculous.
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COUGHING FIT
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I wish to marry for love.
You must marry sensibly, Celeste.
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Love will naturally follow.
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Oh, please, Father!
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Oh, please, Father!
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00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:22,480
CUCKOO CLOCK CHIMES THE HOUR
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00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:26,800
Time to take one of your pills.
Thank you.
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My dear, noble papa.
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I'll see you inside.
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Mmff mff.
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PIANO PLAYS
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Mid pleasures and palaces
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Though we may roam
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Be it ever so humble
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There's no place like home
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ALL: Home, home
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Sweet, sweet home
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There's no place like home
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There's no place like home.
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PIANO STOPS
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Emily, I do wish you'd play
more often. Thanks, Father.
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Mother always used to say
practice makes perfect.
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PIANO STARTS
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..sweet home
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There's no place like home
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There's no place like home.
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PIANO STOPS
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Emily, I do wish you'd play
more often.
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Mother always used to say...
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PIANO STARTS
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..sweet home
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BANGING AND CRASHING
There's no place like home
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PIANO SLOWS DOWN
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There's nooooo...
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..plaaaaace liiiiike...
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..hoooooooooooome.
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PIANO STOPS
Beautiful!
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Emily, I do wish
you'd play more often.
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Mother always used to say...
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PIANO STARTS
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Emily, please, stop practising!
Yes, I'd like to stop practising!
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We'd all like you
to stop practising!
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You must stop practising!
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00:07:31,960 --> 00:07:33,240
PIANO STOPS
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CAT MEOWS
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CAT YOWLS
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MEOWING ECHOES
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Emily...
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..I do wish you'd play more often.
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Yes. Mother always used to say
practice makes perfect.
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Well, not in this case.
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00:08:05,120 --> 00:08:08,400
Where's Celeste? Oh, she's sitting
a while longer in the garden.
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00:08:08,400 --> 00:08:10,400
Oh, yes, it's almost four.
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She'll be waiting for Harper
to come back from riding.
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00:08:13,040 --> 00:08:17,080
Harper? Our stable boy. Celeste
really is obsessed with horses.
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Mm. Horses...
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Harper!
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Hello, Harper.
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Hello, Harper!
Oh!
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Good afternoon, Miss Fennick.
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And hello, Treacle.
How are you, girl?
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Neigh.
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00:09:07,000 --> 00:09:08,960
Why don't you join us
for supper, Harper?
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00:09:08,960 --> 00:09:12,520
The thistles must not grow
amongst the fine roses, miss.
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00:09:12,520 --> 00:09:17,000
Oh, Harper, I do so admire
how you see the world...
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..so simple...
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..so pure...
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..so gentle.
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00:09:32,400 --> 00:09:34,080
I ain't nothing special, miss.
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I brought some oats from the pantry
for your friend here.
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Eat up, Treacle!
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VACUUM WHIRS
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Agh! Agh!
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VACUUM OFF
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She was hungry.
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Neigh!
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Harper?
Miss Fennick?
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THUNDER CRASHES
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Get back indoors, Miss Fennick.
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You don't want
to get caught in the rain.
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Goodbye, Harper.
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Come on, girl.
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Clop-clip, clop-clip.
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"Clip-clop."
Oh, are we both horses?
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Ah, Celeste.
Edwin.
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I meant every word. Please, stop.
I must have you, Emily.
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Edwin, it's over!
You're marrying my sister!
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A marriage of convenience! My father
wants a dowry, yours a title.
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Nothing more.
Oh, Edwin!
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CAT MEOWS INSIDE PIANO
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Meowww...wwwoh, Edwin!
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You must listen to what I'm saying.
But I don't want to hurt you.
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BANG!
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00:10:48,880 --> 00:10:50,640
Excuse me.
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00:10:51,880 --> 00:10:56,680
But Father is ill, and if he were
to find out about you and I, I...
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00:10:56,680 --> 00:10:58,960
..I fear he could not
stand the shock.
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00:10:58,960 --> 00:11:01,320
Then you ought not
to break it off with me.
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00:11:01,320 --> 00:11:04,200
If you do, I'll see
your father learns everything.
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I don't understand what you mean.
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Kiss me!
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00:11:08,360 --> 00:11:09,520
No, Edwin!
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00:11:09,520 --> 00:11:10,640
Ooh!
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00:11:11,840 --> 00:11:14,320
Emily! Emily, come back!
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00:11:14,320 --> 00:11:16,120
Emily!
SHE STRAINS
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00:11:16,120 --> 00:11:18,840
Emily! Emily!
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Stable boy!
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00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:28,080
Stable boy! Oh! Sir. You didn't see
anything just now, did you?
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00:11:28,080 --> 00:11:30,520
Nothing at all, sir.
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00:11:30,520 --> 00:11:32,720
What a charming animal.
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00:11:36,160 --> 00:11:39,760
That's a nice locket you've got
there. It belonged to my mother.
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00:11:39,760 --> 00:11:44,320
Of course. I didn't imagine
you could afford such fine things.
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00:11:44,320 --> 00:11:45,720
I could...
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00:11:45,720 --> 00:11:47,120
..help you with that.
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00:11:50,120 --> 00:11:51,640
Take this.
200
00:11:51,640 --> 00:11:53,040
No!
201
00:11:55,440 --> 00:11:56,920
Take this.
202
00:11:56,920 --> 00:11:58,200
No!
203
00:12:00,040 --> 00:12:01,800
Take this...
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00:12:04,880 --> 00:12:06,240
No!
205
00:12:08,480 --> 00:12:10,360
Take this.
QUIETLY: Don't take it.
206
00:12:12,560 --> 00:12:14,680
No, I couldn't possibly, sir!
207
00:12:16,840 --> 00:12:18,360
No, no.
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00:12:19,880 --> 00:12:21,640
I insist.
209
00:12:24,160 --> 00:12:25,560
No!
210
00:12:25,560 --> 00:12:27,400
I insist!
211
00:12:27,400 --> 00:12:29,480
Do I take it?
No!
212
00:12:29,480 --> 00:12:31,520
You're a horse! You've got nothing
to spend it on.
213
00:12:31,520 --> 00:12:32,840
Apples.
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00:12:32,840 --> 00:12:35,320
Horses don't buy apples!
They would if they had money.
215
00:12:35,320 --> 00:12:38,240
Shut up! Take it!
216
00:12:38,240 --> 00:12:40,000
There's a good chap.
217
00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:42,240
MACHINE WHIRS
218
00:12:44,800 --> 00:12:46,480
WHIRRING STOPS
219
00:12:48,720 --> 00:12:50,480
Come on, girl.
220
00:12:50,480 --> 00:12:51,720
Oh!
221
00:12:51,720 --> 00:12:53,440
Whinny!
222
00:12:55,240 --> 00:12:58,880
Canter, canter.
Clop, clop, clop, clop...
223
00:13:00,400 --> 00:13:02,360
Smythe?
224
00:13:07,840 --> 00:13:09,640
Sir?
225
00:13:09,640 --> 00:13:11,720
Fetch Mr Fennick, would you?
Sir.
226
00:13:11,720 --> 00:13:15,040
I'll be damned if a stable boy's
going to cost me my dowry.
227
00:13:15,040 --> 00:13:16,920
Edwin?
228
00:13:16,920 --> 00:13:18,120
Ah, Mr Fennick!
229
00:13:18,120 --> 00:13:20,040
May I speak with you privately?
Of course.
230
00:13:20,040 --> 00:13:22,720
Step out, will you, Smythe?
Yes, sir.
231
00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:28,560
It's rather unfortunate.
232
00:13:28,560 --> 00:13:31,560
I left my wallet
on the dining table just now,
233
00:13:31,560 --> 00:13:35,720
and when I came back, I found
a pound note missing. Good Lord!
234
00:13:35,720 --> 00:13:38,880
And I hate to say it,
but I saw your man Harper
235
00:13:38,880 --> 00:13:41,120
leave pretty sharpish
when I came in. Harper?
236
00:13:41,120 --> 00:13:44,960
A thief? Thank heavens
Smythe didn't hear you say that.
237
00:13:46,520 --> 00:13:50,240
He is like a father to that boy.
As I say, rather unfortunate.
238
00:13:50,240 --> 00:13:53,240
I'll send for him now.
Smythe, come in here, will you?
239
00:13:56,200 --> 00:13:58,120
Sir?
Smythe!
240
00:13:59,320 --> 00:14:01,920
Go and fetch Harper from the
stables, will you? Of course, sir.
241
00:14:01,920 --> 00:14:04,480
Yes. I need to have a word with him.
Sorry about all this, Edw...
242
00:14:18,560 --> 00:14:21,240
So sorry about all this, Edwin.
Oh, no, not at all.
243
00:14:21,240 --> 00:14:24,040
It's hardly your fault.
Well, it's jolly decent of you.
244
00:14:24,040 --> 00:14:26,960
Mr Fennick, you wanted to see me,
sir? There you are, Harper!
245
00:14:26,960 --> 00:14:29,880
Smythe, wait inside, would you?
As you wish, sir.
246
00:14:29,880 --> 00:14:32,240
I'd rather you didn't
hear this. Now...
247
00:14:32,240 --> 00:14:34,640
BANGING AND CRASHING
Turn out your...
248
00:14:39,440 --> 00:14:42,320
HE SINGS A VERY HIGH NOTE
249
00:14:51,920 --> 00:14:54,720
Turn out your pockets, Harper.
What's this about, sir?
250
00:14:54,720 --> 00:14:57,080
Don't play the fool with me.
What do you mean?
251
00:14:57,080 --> 00:14:59,160
We all know you've taken
the baron's money.
252
00:14:59,160 --> 00:15:01,680
I've done no such thing!
Then how do you explain...
253
00:15:01,680 --> 00:15:03,240
..this...
254
00:15:03,240 --> 00:15:04,280
..bubble gum?
255
00:15:06,320 --> 00:15:09,520
How do you explain this bubble gum?
256
00:15:09,520 --> 00:15:11,760
This hasn't been invented yet!
257
00:15:13,840 --> 00:15:16,480
But also, how do you explain this...
258
00:15:16,480 --> 00:15:18,640
..handful of milk sachets?
259
00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:22,920
You're not supposed to take these
from the canteen!
260
00:15:22,920 --> 00:15:26,040
But also, how do you explain this...
261
00:15:26,040 --> 00:15:28,520
..Dr Frog script?
"Enter Dr Frog.
262
00:15:28,520 --> 00:15:31,160
"'Look at these medical reports.
They're ribbeting.'"
263
00:15:31,160 --> 00:15:33,760
Did you write this? This is dross!
264
00:15:35,320 --> 00:15:37,760
Thank you. Where's the money?
Oh! Yes.
265
00:15:38,720 --> 00:15:40,880
Not your contemporary money!
The money in the play!
266
00:15:40,880 --> 00:15:42,160
Oh! Oh!
267
00:15:42,160 --> 00:15:44,280
Then how do you explain this...
268
00:15:44,280 --> 00:15:46,800
..one-pound note?
269
00:15:49,040 --> 00:15:51,280
Mr Graves insisted
I take it from him, sir.
270
00:15:51,280 --> 00:15:54,200
I did nothing of the sort,
you common thief!
271
00:15:54,200 --> 00:15:57,160
What's going on? It pains me greatly
to do this, Harper,
272
00:15:57,160 --> 00:15:59,280
but you're relieved of your post.
273
00:16:01,080 --> 00:16:03,520
STUDIO AUDIENCE: Awww!
274
00:16:06,680 --> 00:16:09,200
Awww!
275
00:16:10,760 --> 00:16:13,280
Awww!
276
00:16:15,840 --> 00:16:17,600
Awww!
277
00:16:20,160 --> 00:16:22,160
Harper, this is awful.
278
00:16:22,160 --> 00:16:26,800
Oh! Yes. Here. Take my locket
as a token of my love.
279
00:16:26,800 --> 00:16:29,320
SHE GASPS
Oh! When everyone sleeps tonight,
280
00:16:29,320 --> 00:16:31,400
meet me here, and, like the swallows
281
00:16:31,400 --> 00:16:35,200
heading south for warmer climes, we
too shall fly and start a new life.
282
00:16:35,200 --> 00:16:38,920
Oh, Harper! But now go!
283
00:16:38,920 --> 00:16:40,720
THUNDER CRASHES
284
00:16:44,240 --> 00:16:47,360
Bray!
Until tonight, my love.
285
00:16:47,360 --> 00:16:48,720
HARPER CLICKS TONGUE
286
00:16:48,720 --> 00:16:50,560
RIPPING
287
00:17:05,560 --> 00:17:08,200
Whinny! Whinny!
288
00:17:14,120 --> 00:17:17,000
Time to take your pill, Father.
Ah! I suppose.
289
00:17:24,880 --> 00:17:26,560
Ah-ha-ha!
290
00:17:35,960 --> 00:17:37,320
Feeling better, Father?
291
00:17:37,320 --> 00:17:38,760
Mush bether.
292
00:17:41,080 --> 00:17:42,760
CLANGER HITS FLOOR
293
00:17:42,760 --> 00:17:44,560
Ling-a-ling-a-ling...
294
00:17:44,560 --> 00:17:48,560
Dinner is served.
Thank you, Mrs Hargreaves.
295
00:17:55,040 --> 00:17:56,280
Thank you, Smythe.
296
00:17:56,280 --> 00:17:59,320
THUNDER CRASHES
I was right. A storm IS coming.
297
00:17:59,320 --> 00:18:01,600
RAIN POURS DOWN
298
00:18:06,360 --> 00:18:09,800
Come, Papa, you must take your seat
at the head of the table.
299
00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:24,960
I do love this spot.
300
00:18:24,960 --> 00:18:29,560
What a treat it is to be dining
with family and family-to-be.
301
00:18:29,560 --> 00:18:32,440
But, Celeste,
why do you look so sad?
302
00:18:32,440 --> 00:18:36,480
I was just thinking of poor Harper.
The rain is really coming down now.
303
00:18:36,480 --> 00:18:39,200
Yes. I'd hate to be out in this.
304
00:18:39,200 --> 00:18:41,280
It's no less than he deserves.
305
00:18:42,280 --> 00:18:46,120
Chef's finest roast vegetables.
306
00:18:46,120 --> 00:18:49,560
THUD
Oh! Doesn't that look good?
307
00:18:50,680 --> 00:18:52,200
And...
308
00:18:52,200 --> 00:18:54,120
..the gravy.
309
00:18:56,400 --> 00:18:58,000
Looks delicious.
310
00:19:02,560 --> 00:19:04,120
I'll just fetch the wine.
311
00:19:05,720 --> 00:19:08,040
Forgive me.
For such a happy occasion,
312
00:19:08,040 --> 00:19:11,520
there are more tears in my eyes
than I anticipated.
313
00:19:11,520 --> 00:19:14,040
For now, we must toast to Celeste,
314
00:19:14,040 --> 00:19:17,560
until now a Fennick
and soon to be a brand-new Graves.
315
00:19:17,560 --> 00:19:20,160
Water, Mr Fennick?
No, thank you! I've plenty.
316
00:19:21,240 --> 00:19:25,760
Thank you, Bernard,
for welcoming me into your family.
317
00:19:25,760 --> 00:19:29,200
Thank you, Emily, for the warmth
you have shown me.
318
00:19:29,200 --> 00:19:32,680
And, of course, Celeste, my love...
BANGING AND CRASHING
319
00:19:32,680 --> 00:19:36,720
..I cannot wait to share
the rest of my life with you.
320
00:19:36,720 --> 00:19:40,440
Now, please, raise your glasses
to my daughter Celeste.
321
00:19:40,440 --> 00:19:42,640
BANGING
322
00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:46,000
But of course, it would not be right
to toast my daughter without...
323
00:19:46,000 --> 00:19:47,600
HAMMERING
..toasting my new son.
324
00:19:47,600 --> 00:19:50,720
Let us drink as well
to Baron Edwin Graves...
325
00:19:50,720 --> 00:19:53,120
If it's not one thing, it's another!
HAMMERING GETS LOUDER
326
00:19:53,120 --> 00:19:55,120
..TO BARON EDWIN GRAVES,
327
00:19:55,120 --> 00:19:56,800
THE NEWEST MEMBER OF
328
00:19:56,800 --> 00:19:58,640
THE FAMILY!!!
329
00:19:58,640 --> 00:20:00,400
HAMMERING STOPS
Of the family.
330
00:20:00,400 --> 00:20:01,880
Fixed it!
331
00:20:01,880 --> 00:20:03,880
Thank you!
332
00:20:03,880 --> 00:20:06,040
ALL: Cheers.
333
00:20:06,040 --> 00:20:07,480
CRASH!
334
00:20:07,480 --> 00:20:09,560
Sorry!
335
00:20:11,280 --> 00:20:13,280
What a wonderful sentiment, Father.
336
00:20:13,280 --> 00:20:18,200
My darling, what an unusual locket.
Wherever did you get it?
337
00:20:18,200 --> 00:20:19,680
I don't know. Erm...
338
00:20:19,680 --> 00:20:23,040
I've had it for years.
Is that so? It was Mother's.
339
00:20:23,040 --> 00:20:25,320
Your mother's locket was silver.
340
00:20:25,320 --> 00:20:27,080
I'm sure you're mistaken, Father.
341
00:20:27,080 --> 00:20:29,960
How's your food?
A little dry.
342
00:20:29,960 --> 00:20:34,040
Oh, Father, don't start yet.
We must say grace. Ah, of course.
343
00:20:34,040 --> 00:20:35,520
Dear Lord...
344
00:20:35,520 --> 00:20:37,440
Oh, dear Lord!
345
00:20:37,440 --> 00:20:40,200
..bless this food unto us...
and us to your service.
346
00:20:40,200 --> 00:20:43,520
Protect us from harm and keep us
safe in your kingdom. Amen!
347
00:20:43,520 --> 00:20:45,320
ALL: Amen!
348
00:20:47,200 --> 00:20:49,600
Marvellous. Let's tuck in.
349
00:20:53,080 --> 00:20:56,360
Emily? Would you pass
the horseradish?
350
00:21:02,520 --> 00:21:04,760
Celeste, don't slouch.
351
00:21:08,680 --> 00:21:13,240
You really must try some of
this cranberry sauce. Yes, Father.
352
00:21:28,680 --> 00:21:30,720
THEY WHIMPER
353
00:21:37,600 --> 00:21:39,840
LOUD BANGING AND CRASHING
354
00:21:39,840 --> 00:21:41,960
I, FOR ONE, AM VERY GLAD
TO BE HERE WITH YOU ALL!
355
00:21:41,960 --> 00:21:43,680
AND EVERYTHING IS SIMPLY DELICIOUS!
356
00:21:43,680 --> 00:21:45,280
WHERE'S SMYTHE WITH THAT RUMP?
357
00:21:45,280 --> 00:21:47,400
SMYTHE! SMYTHE!
SMYTHE!
358
00:21:48,840 --> 00:21:51,840
SMYTHE!
SMYTHE!
359
00:22:00,080 --> 00:22:01,800
PIANO PLAYS BEAUTIFULLY
360
00:22:01,800 --> 00:22:03,080
..home
361
00:22:03,080 --> 00:22:07,160
ALL: There's no place like home.
362
00:22:07,160 --> 00:22:08,720
PIANO STOPS
363
00:22:17,640 --> 00:22:19,560
Oh, good, the rain's stopped.
364
00:22:21,640 --> 00:22:24,840
Emily, my dear, when will we be
seeing you marry, I wonder?
365
00:22:25,880 --> 00:22:27,040
I...
366
00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:30,640
..have no intention of marrying
any time soon, Father.
367
00:22:30,640 --> 00:22:32,720
So young to have
sworn off men already.
368
00:22:32,720 --> 00:22:33,840
HE CHUCKLES
369
00:22:33,840 --> 00:22:36,320
Indeed I have, Father.
370
00:22:36,320 --> 00:22:38,520
My little experience of gentlemen
has taught me
371
00:22:38,520 --> 00:22:41,880
to...find them...quite beastly.
372
00:22:50,200 --> 00:22:52,040
Father...
373
00:22:54,120 --> 00:22:55,880
..would you carve the rump?
374
00:23:06,080 --> 00:23:09,760
Please, allow me
to season it first, sir.
375
00:23:16,520 --> 00:23:19,840
And I'll, er, just...
376
00:23:19,840 --> 00:23:22,360
..check that it is cooked through.
377
00:23:26,040 --> 00:23:29,840
We will... We'll take it as read
that that's fine to eat,
378
00:23:29,840 --> 00:23:31,800
although we will not eat that.
379
00:23:34,200 --> 00:23:36,160
I quite agree with you, Emily.
380
00:23:36,160 --> 00:23:41,120
There are some gentlemen who are
barely men and anything but gentle.
381
00:23:41,120 --> 00:23:44,000
I can't stand
another moment of this!
382
00:23:44,000 --> 00:23:46,040
Sitting inside, all cosy and warm,
383
00:23:46,040 --> 00:23:48,000
and all the while,
you are lying to us!
384
00:23:48,000 --> 00:23:50,480
I don't know what you mean!
Don't play the fool.
385
00:23:50,480 --> 00:23:53,000
You're wearing Harper's locket.
386
00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:56,200
THUNDER CRASHES
387
00:23:56,200 --> 00:24:00,040
Your daughter is planning to
run away with a common stable boy.
388
00:24:00,040 --> 00:24:01,680
Is this true, Celeste?!
389
00:24:01,680 --> 00:24:04,240
It is, Father. I love him.
390
00:24:04,240 --> 00:24:05,800
And I love her.
391
00:24:05,800 --> 00:24:08,040
This is too much
for my fragile lungs.
392
00:24:08,040 --> 00:24:10,320
QUICK COUGHING FIT
393
00:24:10,320 --> 00:24:14,080
Have you no shame? You're one
to talk! It's time to come clean.
394
00:24:14,080 --> 00:24:17,160
Emily, please! Edwin and I
have been having a liaison.
395
00:24:17,160 --> 00:24:19,040
Oh, my heart!
396
00:24:21,040 --> 00:24:22,680
Can you ever forgive me, Celeste?
397
00:24:22,680 --> 00:24:26,160
My love, it's time.
We must flee this cruel house.
398
00:24:26,160 --> 00:24:29,240
You'll not be going anywhere
without your horse.
399
00:24:29,240 --> 00:24:31,400
THEY GASP
400
00:24:32,440 --> 00:24:33,760
Action!
401
00:24:37,400 --> 00:24:40,600
You're right, we probably
could have used less.
402
00:24:40,600 --> 00:24:43,600
Treacle! Treacle! No!
403
00:24:45,320 --> 00:24:47,200
STUDIO AUDIENCE: Awww!
404
00:24:47,200 --> 00:24:50,680
Oh, Edwin, how could you?
Now that the horse is dead,
405
00:24:50,680 --> 00:24:54,000
it's time to put the dog
out of its misery.
406
00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:55,480
SHE GASPS
407
00:25:00,160 --> 00:25:01,800
BANG!
408
00:25:03,600 --> 00:25:05,560
Celeste, no!
409
00:25:05,560 --> 00:25:07,240
Edwin!
410
00:25:13,080 --> 00:25:15,200
ARGH!
411
00:25:17,720 --> 00:25:20,280
Celeste? Oh, dear Celeste,
don't die.
412
00:25:20,280 --> 00:25:23,000
Celeste knew there was
a terrible storm coming.
413
00:25:23,000 --> 00:25:26,160
Look how happy we were
just a few hours ago...
414
00:25:27,520 --> 00:25:30,560
..playing croquet
without a care in the world.
415
00:25:30,560 --> 00:25:32,560
A frog was there.
416
00:25:32,560 --> 00:25:34,320
SHE GASPS
417
00:25:34,320 --> 00:25:36,480
Celeste, you're alive!
How?
418
00:25:39,880 --> 00:25:42,320
Harper's locket!
THUNDER CRASHES
419
00:25:42,320 --> 00:25:43,360
Thank God!
420
00:25:44,680 --> 00:25:46,440
But what about Treacle?
421
00:25:46,440 --> 00:25:47,480
Treacle! Treacle!
422
00:25:47,480 --> 00:25:51,320
She's alive!
She's going to be all right!
423
00:25:51,320 --> 00:25:54,200
VACUUM WHIRS
No, Treacle! Treacle, no!
424
00:25:54,200 --> 00:25:55,520
HE CRIES OUT
425
00:25:55,520 --> 00:25:57,760
Treacle! Treacle! Agh!
426
00:26:00,840 --> 00:26:02,520
VACUUM STOPS
427
00:26:02,520 --> 00:26:04,280
Bray, bray!
428
00:26:06,000 --> 00:26:09,800
Father, I am so sorry
to have caused you such pain.
429
00:26:09,800 --> 00:26:14,520
My darling girl, all I ever wanted
was for you to be happy.
430
00:26:14,520 --> 00:26:18,120
If Harper makes you happy,
then you have my blessing.
431
00:26:18,120 --> 00:26:22,160
Be he pauper or prince, he will be
part of our family. Thank you, sir.
432
00:26:23,120 --> 00:26:26,280
No, no.
STUDIO AUDIENCE: Awwwww!
433
00:26:26,280 --> 00:26:28,920
Where's Smythe?
Smythe, you must hear of this!
434
00:26:31,440 --> 00:26:33,160
STUDIO AUDIENCE CHEERS AND APPLAUDS
435
00:26:33,160 --> 00:26:34,240
Sir, I...
436
00:26:38,840 --> 00:26:40,680
Indeed.
437
00:26:41,720 --> 00:26:44,520
Emily, are you all right?
Of course.
438
00:26:44,520 --> 00:26:49,040
Edwin was a frightful man who preyed
upon me in my young..."naivete".
439
00:26:49,040 --> 00:26:50,680
BANG!
440
00:26:54,320 --> 00:26:55,800
Excuse me...
441
00:26:57,520 --> 00:27:00,840
I'm so sorry to have inflicted
that dreadful man upon you.
442
00:27:00,840 --> 00:27:02,080
Well, I say...
443
00:27:03,400 --> 00:27:04,760
..good riddance to him.
444
00:27:06,200 --> 00:27:07,840
THUD!
445
00:27:18,800 --> 00:27:21,640
Look, everyone,
the clouds are clearing.
446
00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:25,240
The storm has passed.
BIRDSONG
447
00:27:27,160 --> 00:27:28,960
Harper?
448
00:27:28,960 --> 00:27:31,080
Perhaps you'd like
to join us inside.
449
00:27:32,320 --> 00:27:33,880
Thank you, sir.
450
00:27:36,240 --> 00:27:41,000
I feel as though an awful weight
has been lifted off my lungs.
451
00:27:41,000 --> 00:27:44,440
Emily, perhaps you'd play
that song for us again.
452
00:27:44,440 --> 00:27:47,080
Of course, Father!
PIANO PLAYS
453
00:27:47,080 --> 00:27:51,080
Sweet, sweet home
ALL: There's no...
454
00:27:51,080 --> 00:27:54,200
MEOWING
..place like home
455
00:27:54,200 --> 00:27:57,520
There's no place like home.
456
00:27:57,520 --> 00:28:00,240
EMILY SHRIEKS, CAT YOWLS
457
00:28:00,290 --> 00:28:04,840
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