Original subtitles

("Good Ol' Boys" by The Apple Bros. playing)

JACK: Hey, hey, hey.

I don't mean to sound like a broken record

- but... - Could I work faster?

Yeah, that'd be a good idea.

I'm not gonna be able to shake this guy. We're carrying

too much weight here.

Hey, careful with that, hoss.

That's a road flare.

Not anymore.

♪ Since the day they was born ♪

♪ Come on and straighten the curves... ♪

- Jack, pop the hood. - Pop the hood?

Are you messing with me right now?

Fine.

I'm not sure how

not seeing the road's gonna help us, man.

Here.

Wedge that in the hood hinge.

Wait a minute, is this a...?

Bomb. Yes.

Great.

(tires screech)

MacGYVER: Open the sunroof.

So how does this make us go faster?

It doesn't.

This does.

Cars, like people, need energy to move.

And cars, like people,

get a lot of that energy from oxygen.

When oxygen-rich air is sucked into an engine,

it turns into energy through combustion,

which drives the pistons,

which turns the... long story short: the more air

the more power.

(Jack whoops)

(laughs)

Yeah!

♪ ♪

- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans - -- www.Addic7ed.com --

JACK: So, that stuff you put in the back,

it's not gonna dissolve through the plastic and...

Don't worry. It's not gonna spill.

Okay, I was gonna say explode,

so I'm glad to hear that.

I didn't sign the damage waiver

on this pregnant roller skate.

Oh, yeah.

That's why we should've taken your car.

No way, man, you know the rules in my car.

No food, no drink,

no dirty-ass feet up on the dash

and definitely no dangerous chemicals

sloshing around in the back.

Jack, come on, breathe, man.

We're going away for some R & R.

You got to let the tension go.

You let the tension go, Bozer.

This car's in my name, dude.

And please, for the last time,

get that water bottle off that leather seat.

BOZER: It's leatherette.

My aunt's cat could do his business all over this seat

and it would clean up with one Bounty.

Okay, first of all, gross.

Second, who rents a minivan?

Oh, wait, old people. Never mind.

Hey, for your information,

the minivan is the workhorse

of the middle class.

Besides...

this was the last rental

on the whole damn lot.

And in lime green?

(exaggerated gasp) I'm shocked.

Mac, you don't happen

to have any duct tape, you know, for the word hole?

- Hey. - No, and even if I did,

she's not wrong.

Oh, thanks a lot. Thanks.

RILEY: You were right, Mac.

It's pretty up here.

Yeah.

Mission City has its charms.

If you admit it has its charms, then why haven't we been back?

We've been busy.

BOZER: Not that busy.

All right? Mr. Ericson's

been asking you to come speak to his class

for five years now

and every year you turn him down,

even though I say we should go.

Yeah, well, you were right.

I think getting away is gonna be good for all of us.

Yeah, it will.

Psyched to see what's changed in the old hood,

grab a bite from Burger Nirvana...

maybe, uh, see what Darlene Martin's up to.

- JACK: You never told me about Darlene. - BOZER: Hey...

Darlene was the prettiest girl in school

and Mac's chem lab partner.

He had a huge crush on her.

Huge.

Yeah, and then I lost a bet,

Bozer made me ask her to prom.

You helped Mac get a prom date?

That's nice of you.

It would've been...

- but Darlene Martin shot Mac down cold. - No, I...

- It was very disrespectful. - I didn't even want to go to prom.

- What? I didn't even... - (Jack and Bozer laughing)

There was a live shuttle launch on TV that night.

- I wanted to see where we... - No, no, no, wait a minute.

Just back up now. Back up.

You lost a bet so you were forced

to ask a hot chick to the prom?

You and I had a very different

high school experience, my friend.

And how was your high school experience, Miss Davis?

I imagine you broke a lot of hearts.

Well, actually, no.

I spent most of my time

teaching myself how to hack

- military-grade encryption. - JACK: Oh... my God.

I'm in a car full of nerds.

Who rented this minivan again?

- BOZER: Mm. - Really?

Hey...

Well, you won't have to hack anything this weekend

and I must say, it's, um,

it's nice seeing your face without a screen in front of it.

Mission City Junior High.

No one would ever believe that two secret agents

used to walk these halls.

Whoa, whoa.

Bit generous calling yourself an agent.

You haven't even started yet...

but you got the secret part right.

You mention anything about the Phoenix,

Thorton'll make you disappear.

Mac!

Hey! You know, these teachers

here, they had a running bet.

Will Angus MacGyver

ever come back?

Only took me five years to win.

- It's great to see you, Mac. - (chuckles)

You too, Mr. Ericson.

Oh, Mr. Ericson? Please.

I think you're old enough now to call me Arthur.

Yeah, seems a little weird,

but okay...

Arthur, I'd like you to meet

some of my think tank coworkers.

- This is Jack Dalton. - Hey, Jack.

- This is Riley Davis. - Riley.

- Hi. - And, uh, I think

you remember Bozer.

Wilt Bozer, oh, my God.

The only graduate

that didn't include a quote about himself in the yearbook.

Well, that's because you vetoed the one I submitted.

"Most Likely to Conceive" was unanimously rejected

for being in poor taste.

Glad to see you haven't changed.

Ideas.

Conceive ideas.

I'm a misunderstood genius.

Okay, fair warning, Mac,

some of the faculty still haven't forgiven you

- for the, uh, incident. - (chuckles)

Mis...

Arthur, that was 14 years ago.

And why are they only mad at me?

Bozer was there, too.

Clearly, they know I was

only there to lend you moral support.

(school bell rings)

Oh, wow, will you look at that, late for class.

(laughing): Some things never change.

ERICSON: ...and so he went from MIT to the army,

where he worked as an EOD tech disarming bombs overseas.

- (students murmuring) - And now he's working with a think tank

Solving problems facing our future.

They're all yours, Mac.

Uh... (clears throat)

Hi. I'm, uh, Mac.

So, science.

Think we can all agree that it is...

Well, there's nothing more interesting.

Am I right?

Yes.

Mr. Ericson said you built an in-line

four-cylinder engine in sixth grade. Is that true?

I did. I wanted to make it a V-6,

but I just couldn't find all the parts.

So if you cracked a cylinder, would you fix it

with pinning technique or use the furnace weld?

The real issue is microfractures in the metallic crystal lattice.

You can't get rid of them... That's why a furnace weld

is preferable over a cold technique like pinning.

Especially when considering excessive heating

under high compression.

I prefer

a tungsten inert gas weld

on... aluminum.

(MacGyver smacks lips)

But we can talk about that after class.

For now, let's focus on something fun.

Who likes to watch things blow up?

KIDS: Me! Me!

Ah...

And this... this is where

I first met Mac.

We were in the fifth grade.

He was getting his butt kicked by Donnie Sandoz,

this big ugly dude from the wrestling team.

- Mac was bullied? - When you got

a first name like Angus, yeah, you're pretty much running

for your life all through high school.

Things got better after we met.

Well, actually, things got better

after I broke Donnie's nose.

Oh. Good for you.

- Attaboy. - I also got suspended for two weeks.

But Mac would come over every day after school with my homework,

and from there, a great friendship was born.

Any chance the location

- of "the incident" is on this tour? - Yeah,

Mac and I pinky-swore never to speak about that again.

Moving along, then,

hey, let me show you the gym

where Mac made lightning indoors.

You know we're not

leaving Mission City till we get details

- on this incident, right? - Oh, yeah.

MacGYVER: Now you add soap

to the hydrogen peroxide-food coloring mixture.

The soap bubbles

are what trap the oxygen.

Now dump the watery yeast in,

and the immediate result is

a very powerful exothermic reaction.

(students gasping, exclaiming)

MacGYVER: It's called elephant toothpaste.

It's a perfect example of a rapid chemical reaction.

ERICSON: Wow. Thank you, Mac.

Thanks for that amazing demonstration.

(students cheer)

(school bell rings)

That was great. The kids loved it.

If you get tired of that think tank,

you got a knack for teaching.

Thanks. That means a lot coming from you.

When I'm done cleaning up this mess, we're gonna go

to Burger Nirvana, if you want to join.

Oh, I would, but... you know, I always keep the lab open

for the students after school.

You remember.

How could I forget? I practically lived here.

(quietly): Hey, you got a smart one over there.

Oh. Valerie Lawson. Yeah.

She's the brightest kid I've ev...

well, I've ever had since you.

She devours everything I throw at her.

Chemistry, biology, physics, you name it.

Yeah, she was blowing me away with her questions earlier.

Yeah. Well, I don't know.

Something wrong?

Well, something's going on with her.

Her grades starting dropping a couple of months ago.

That reminds me.

- After your... - After my dad left.

Yeah.

And she's from a single-parent home, too.

Lately, this very inquisitive young lady

has become very, very quiet.

Talking to you today, that's the most

I've heard her speak in weeks.

(sighs)

Nice work.

Where'd you get the servos from?

An RC car?

DVD players. But...

I'm still trying to increase their range of...

Motion?

Did you try to adjust

the feedback potentiometers?

I tried that, but I lost so much precision

it basically negated the increase in torque.

Well...

what about down here?

Let's just try this out...

Can I help you?

Hey, uh, I'm afraid this is school property.

I'm gonna have to ask...

(Valerie screams)

(groans)

Give us the girl and you won't get hurt.

MacGYVER: I know what you're thinking...

This isn't gonna be a fair fight.

There's only two of them,

and I'm in a science lab.

Where do you think you're going?

(grunts)

VALERIE (screaming): No! Stop! Please, stop!

Mac! (screams)

(grunts)

(electrical buzzing)

(groans)

I don't know who the hell you are.

But if you or anyone else call the cops,

then the girl's dead.

Okay. That's good. We'll talk to you in a little bit.

Well, Riley and Bozer

got Mr. Ericson to the E.R. He's gonna be fine.

So, did these guys say what they wanted with the girl?

Just... not to tell the cops.

Okay. Well, Riley's getting into the school security system,

see if we can get some footage of the kidnappers.

Once we have that,

we'll hunt these guys down and find Valerie.

(knocking on door)

MAN (distant): Yeah?

Mr. Lawson?

What do you want?

We're here about your daughter, Valerie. Can you open up?

(birds chirping)

LAWSON: They, uh...

called me at work. Just... told me to come home and wait.

Wait for what?

I don't know. Just... wait.

Any idea who these guys were, or why they'd want to take Valerie?

No.

No idea.

You, uh...

raced rally car, I see, huh?

LAWSON: Oh. (clears throat)

Well, yeah... A long time ago.

I, uh... I was working my way up through open wheel,

when, uh...

when Kelli got sick.

I realized I... I was all Val had left,

so, uh... I don't know, it just...

it started feeling a little too dangerous, you know?

That explains why she knows so much about cars.

Yeah.

Mr. Lawson, do you have any enemies?

Do you owe anyone money?

Look, I don't know who you guys are,

but these people said no cops.

Well, actually, we're the people you call

- when they say "no cops". - Yeah, that may be so,

but, uh... I really don't think they want me having any help.

You may have put Val in more danger just by being here.

I-I think the best thing to do is for you guys just to leave

and-and let me handle this.

Yes, sir.

(exhales)

That's cow pies, man.

That's a big old pile of cow patties.

That dude's in on it.

- Kidnapping his own daughter? - Yeah.

I don't think so, but there is something he's not telling us.

So, how do we get him talking?

♪ ♪

I actually have an idea.

But I'm sure you're not gonna like it.

I don't like liars.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, hey, can we talk

about this for a minute, bud?

I'm responsible for all the damages, remember?

Okay.

So...

Your "bank account"

or missing kid.

All right.

(MacGyver grunts)

(grunts)

JACK: Well, since you just cost me my deposit, you may as well

go ahead and tell me what you're making here.

Well, I'm taking advantage of Maxwell's theory

of electromagnetism and its relation to light particles.

Conversational English, please.

Well... (clears throat)

...I'm gonna take the laser from the CD player,

bounce it off that window,

reflect it into this photocell

to create a remote listening device.

It'll turn the vibrations into sound.

That way we can just hang back

and still hear what's going on inside.

Probably could have done that without ripping out the dash.

(radio static)

LAWSON: I'm glad you're okay, Arthur.

I appreciate you calling.

But, look, I have to keep this line open.

Uh, I know, but they said not to tell the police or...

Look, I'll call the minute I know anything.

All right? I-I promise.

I don't know.

Maybe the thing he's not telling us

is just that he's terrified.

Well, you heard the man. If they're calling to negotiate,

that means that Valerie's still alive.

- Right. - Figure all we have to do

is wait for that phone call,

it'll probably lead us to where they're holding her.

No big deal.

I know another way in.

You and Mac used to break in here a lot?

All the time.

Wow.

You guys were real juvenile delinquents.

Uh, says the girl who was in prison.

We weren't delinquents, all right?

Come on, this is Mac we're talking about.

Guy's always been a Boy Scout.

A Boy Scout who partakes in breaking and entering.

We were breaking in so he could do more experiments after hours.

Sure, sometimes his curiosity got out of hand, all right?

But it was your typical run-of-the-mill science nerd trouble.

With occasional police involvement.

(laughing): Okay, our way in is just up here.

There's a skylight that doesn't lock, all right?

So Mac and I, we used to climb this tree to get to the roof,

- and then, you know, we would be up... - Bozer.

Huh?

(sighs) They, uh...

must've cut the tree down.

Damn... That was a nice tree.

All right. No worries, all right?

Stay calm, I got this.

All right, all I have to do is, uh, time my jump,

grab that crack up there, uh, pull myself up,

swing a leg over, and, uh,

we should be good, you know.

Some would call me a cougar.

Guess I learned a few things watching Mac these last few months.

Yeah.

Then I'll, uh, have to keep an extra close eye on you.

So I can, you know, learn all this spy stuff.

Okay.

How long will it take you to get...

- I'm in. - Oh.

Damn.

BOZER: Look. These idiots parked their cars

right in front of the school.

Can you zoom in on their license plate?

Best I can do is a partial plate on one of the cars.

Even if I can hack the DMV on this fossil,

it could take days to ID these guys.

May not need the DMV when you got the B-O-Z.

You're kinda supposed to do the cool thing first,

then give yourself props.

My bad, my bad.

First mission.

It's not a mission.

It's kind of a mission.

Okay, I'm gonna just do that cool thing now.

(camera shutter clicks)

(radio static)

You know, I used to believe you

when you would say you were too busy to come home,

but now I'm starting to realize Bozer was right.

You avoid it completely.

That's why you never even talk about it.

Just 'cause you never shut up

- about Texas doesn't mean... - Hey, hey, hey.

...that I have to be proud of where I'm from.

That's called Lone Star pride, all right?

And Texas is a state, not a town.

It did use to be its own country,

but don't get me sidetracked.

I know what it's like to have mixed feelings about a place.

All right?

Look, is coming home really that bad?

No. No, it's not bad,

it's just... It's complicated.

Oh, yeah.

I get it, you like to live like a shark.

Oh, yeah, yeah. Always...

swimming straight forward,

never looking back, and that's cool, man.

Sharks are cool.

But even if a shark could make a choice...

I mean, if it had a brain

that was developed enough to make a conscious decision,

I don't know the science behind it...

But if it could choose between swimming forward,

all the time, or stop

and taking a moment to reflect.

You want to bail out of this metaphor, don't you?

(laughing): Hey, what I'm saying is,

it's okay to step back,

reflect, look at the past,

come home, and let it remind you

what it is that makes you you.

Even if it's complicated.

(scoffs)

You know, in spite of yourself,

I think I understand what you're saying,

and you're right.

(phone rings)

JACK: Yeah. Hey, guys.

Hey.

I got a lead on the kidnappers.

You pulled a plate from security cams and hacked the DMV?

Actually, no...

You don't need the DMV when you got the B-O-Z.

Did I do it right that time?

No, because now you're just repeating yourself.

MacGYVER: Guys. Kidnapped little girl here.

Oh, right. Sorry, Mac.

So I noticed the kidnappers' cars were all tricked out,

a lot of aftermarket parts.

So I thought, Mission City's not that big,

somebody has to know who does that kind of work.

So I called Justin Wright.

Jus-Justin Wright?

The kid who stole my sneakers and threw them off the bus?

Yeah, he's a lawyer now, totally mellowed out.

A-And to be fair, you did incinerate his moped.

Anyway, Justin was always into cars, so I called him up,

and he said there's only one guy in town

who does that kind of customization.

A former race car driver turned mechanic.

Frank Lawson.

Bingo.

He knows who took his daughter.

Which means he knows how to find her.

There he is.

- Hey. Hey! - (engine revving)

I'm starting to get the feeling this guy's in way over his head.

Yeah, yeah. Guy tore out of here in quite the hurry.

We were hoping maybe you could hack a satellite,

ping his GPS, something like that.

Yeah.

All right, thanks.

So Riley confirmed

that Lawson didn't get any calls on his landline.

She's checking right now

to see if he got any texts on his cell from the kidnappers.

What? You got something here?

Hybrid tread patterns.

So he's got tires that are made for pavement and off-roading.

And...

see the way his tires gripped the road right there?

Even after he fishtailed?

He's got special suspension.

Okay, so he's looking to go fast over uneven terrain.

JACK: Why is that, you think?

Look at what came off his tire.

You look like that's important,

but I'm just seeing a clump of mud there, brah.

Red clay, also called ultisol.

Mainly found in the southeast, but we do have a couple

of deposits up here in NorCal.

My grandfather used to tell me stories

about how bootleggers used that old logging road

to smuggle goods during Prohibition.

About an hour drive from here.

Ex-race car driver, car's tricked out for off-roading.

You think he's doing some smuggling?

So you never finished telling me

what was so complicated about you coming home.

It's hard for me to come up here

because...

(sighs) I just feel guilty.

"Guilty"? Guilty for what?

(sighs)

Guilty because I have so many good memories of this place.

Memories of my dad, memories of my grandfather.

Moving in with Bozer.

But... (clears throat)

Mission City is always gonna be the place

where I lost my mom.

Hmm.

Eh, it just feels wrong being happy in this place.

Yeah.

I pretty much went through the same thing

with my old man.

For years after he died, I was miserable.

Couldn't go anywhere near that GTO.

All the times we spent working on it,

all the road trips we had together.

Just avoided it.

And then one day I'm sitting there staring at it,

and I could've sworn I heard his voice say,

"Boy, we rebuild that old thing

just to let it sit there and collect rust like that?"

So I took it out for a spin,

and I'm pretty sure he was riding shotgun,

'cause I got really happy,

like really happy for the first time in years.

And I know that's all he ever wanted

was for me to be happy.

And, you know, I never met your mother

and I don't know your situation, but I am sure

that she would want you to be happy,

no matter

where you are, no matter what you're doing.

Know what I mean?

Yeah.

I think I do.

(ringtone playing)

Great.

Wait, what do we say?

What do we tell our by-the-book boss

about the off-the-books operation we're running

while we're supposed to be

on vacation? I would plead the fifth

on that one, boss.

Well, she's gonna find out, and she's gonna be mad.

Oh, so what? She's always mad at me. Shoot.

I put a living room suite in the doghouse, man.

(both chuckle)

(phone rings)

Who's that?

Thornton's been blowing up my phone.

- I haven't answered yet, but she... - Well, hello, Director Thornton.

I'm fine,

thank you.

Uh, the team? Which team?

Oh, that team.

Oh, yeah, yeah. They're good. I mean,

we're-we're good. H-How are you?

Peachy, Wilt. We have another op coming up

in 48 hours.

Another op?

48 hours?

Yes.

That's why I need everybody back by then.

But right now, I need to find out

why no one's answering my calls.

Um, I'm not sure why no one's answering your calls.

I-I mean, I-I do.

Uh, we're at the movies. Fun fact,

same theater where I showed my first short film.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So e-everyone's in airplane mode.

I-I'm a... I'm a stickler

for cinema etiquette.

Then why are you not in airplane mode?

Uh... I'm not in the movie?

You're not?

No. I'm, uh...

I went for a walk. I went for a walk.

I-I got a lot on my mind.

You know, I'm still trying to wrap my head around

my-my best friend being a super spy

a-and Jack and-an,

you know, my girlfriend being a part of the crew.

And so, y... so, you know,

I'm just outside, you know, processing.

I th... And I think my re... My reception's ba...

Whew.

That was a good cover story, right?

No.

That was a "I'm up to something, please look into it" story.

So there's room for improvement?

If Thornton wasn't suspicious before, she sure is now.

Yeah, well, we're just gonna have to deal with her later.

Right now, we need to focus on finding Valerie.

Jack, slow down.

That's him.

What's he doing?

Let's go ask him.

Hey!

Hey! Hang on a second now.

Lawson, don't do it. Hey!

We just want to talk to you.

(tires screech)

What are you doing? I was trying to stop him.

Yeah. I was actually stopping him.

Where's Valerie?

You killed her. You know that? Now I'm stuck.

- You both just killed my little girl. - What are you talking about?

What is going on?

Mac, he's got a lot of money back here.

Look, I want to help you find your daughter,

but you got to tell me what's going on here.

I lied to you both.

I-I know why they kidnapped Valerie.

Why?

A few years ago, the-the guys that took Val,

they-they came to me and asked me to do some driving for them.

So this isn't a ransom payment.

You're smuggling drug money for these guys?

Business at my shop was terrible.

The bank was about to foreclose on my house.

I didn't even know how I was gonna put food on the table.

So-so I took the job.

Pick up money from this spot, drive it across state lines.

It's, it's pretty simple.

And the money they paid me, it kept us alive.

You said you knew why they took her.

Because last week, I quit.

The cops are onto these guys.

The roads are crawling with patrols and checkpoints.

I already lost my wife.

I don't have any other family.

If I get arrested, then Valerie's gonna be left

with no one.

I'm guessing they wouldn't take no for an answer.

So they took Valerie instead, right?

An hour ago, they texted me and they said if I make one more run

for them that they would meet me at the end with Val.

Exchange her for the money.

Now that my car's ruined, I...

I can't make the run.

If I don't make the run, then my daughter's as good as dead.

They're-they're gonna kill my little girl.

We won't let that happen.

We're gonna drive for you.

(strained): So, how long till you're supposed to meet the guys

who took Valerie?

About an hour.

But it takes at least that long to get

to the meet point. They said that if I'm not on time,

they're gonna kill her.

Look, but I-I don't know how you're gonna get there

in that thing. I mean, you got a minivan with-with no traps,

no mods for off-road terrain. If you're gonna get there in time,

you got to be fast, really fast.

Even one cop tries to stop you guys, it's over

We're not gonna outrun the cops.

We're gonna avoid 'em completely.

Hey, Bozer,

I need you to make me an antenna array

for a radio direction-finding system.

Make a who to the what, now?

Don't worry, I'll walk you through the whole thing.

Do you still remember how to get into the band hall?

♪ ♪

All right, okay, okay, okay.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

(grunts)

All right, I'm coming.

I'm going, I'm going.

All right, okay.

All right, slow down! Slow down!

MacGYVER: Not that long ago, Bozer and I were in

Mr. Ericson's class, the same class Valerie is taking now,

learning all about radio waves.

Turns out, with a couple of D.I.Y. antennas

and some fairly simple math,

you can pinpoint the source of any radio transmission.

In this case, the police band radios will tell us

where the cops are.

(panting)

Okay. Guess this finally answers the question

I always used to ask Mr. Ericson,

when are we ever gonna use this stuff in real life?

(chuckles) Okay, Mac.

Now we just got to overlay your cell phone's

GPS signal onto our map and...

Voila.

(indistinct police transmission)

Looks like they got five-O coming right at them.

Jack, take your next left now.

(tires screech)

(indistinct radio transmission)

Cop didn't call anything in.

I don't think he saw you.

Looks like you're in the clear for now.

Yeah!

(both chuckle)

Hey, this might actually work.

But to aid us in our cause,

I think we need some driving tunes.

(rock music playing)

♪ All the villagers were peaceful and happy ♪

♪ So humble in their own divide ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Get you inside, scratching my hid... ♪

BOZER: 30 minutes to the meet, guys,

and you've left the cops in your rearview.

Looks like smooth sailing all the way.

♪ All little people gonna run in the house ♪

(siren wailing)

JACK: Yeah, I'm not sure

where you're getting your nautical info,

Bozer, but this does not count as smooth sailing.

The antenna array only locates cops who are using their radios.

This guy must've had his off.

Then I guess we're just gonna have to outrun him. Hang on.

Jack, you said it yourself, this is a minivan.

Then you better turn it into a maxivan, pronto.

Let's go!

♪ Oh, but you're so pretty ♪

(grunts)

If he calls his buddies, they're screwed.

Dispatch, this is Lincoln-5. I'm in pursuit.

I'm southbound on 44

in pursuit of...

(static crackling)

Dispatch!

(static crackling)

What'd you do?

Jammed their radio signals.

BOZER: Badass.

♪ Where you think you're safe ♪

♪ I'm hungry, I won't hesitate ♪

♪ All little people gonna run in the house ♪

♪ Oh, they'll run in the house ♪

♪ All little people gonna run in the house ♪

♪ All little people gonna run in the house ♪

♪ All little people gonna go run back inside ♪

♪ All little people gonna run the house ♪

(engine revving)

(laughs)

Yeah!

♪ Running ♪

♪ I'm running. ♪

(birds chirping)

Okay, get out.

What?

These guys are expecting one driver.

We're gonna give 'em one driver. Get out.

You sure about this?

No, not really, but this way,

if something goes wrong, you get to swoop in

and save a damsel in distress.

(sighs)

Hey.

What's that for?

This? Oh.

I don't know yet.

(chuckles) Right.

Hi, Valerie.

Hi.

Now I'm sure you boys have a lot of questions...

I can understand that, but all that matters right now is...

I brought your money.

Who the hell are you?

Don't worry about it.

Where's Frank?

These are two of the questions I was referring to.

Frank ain't gonna make it. I'm here in his place.

And just to be clear, this was not the vehicle I requested.

So,

there it is.

All of it.

Y'all want your money or not?

We'll take the money... but you can tell Frank

that we're gonna hang onto his little girl.

And if he ever wants

daddy-daughter time, he's gonna keep driving for us

permanently.

We own him.

Oh, okay.

Come and get it.

MacGYVER: Delta commandos, like Jack,

are trained to use loud sounds

to distract and disorient their enemies during combat.

And while the guys we're facing are definitely dangerous,

it's a safe bet they don't have the same training.

So if I can do something loud enough

to make any normal person flinch, these guys will.

As for Jack, well, he's the furthest thing from normal.

(explosive pop)

(grunting)

Get in there!

Hey!

Let's go.

(grunting)

Jack, call Bozer. Tell him you need to meet me at the lab.

Lab?

- Bozer knows! - Okay.

(both panting)

We're almost there, I promise.

(insects trilling and chirping)

You know how to climb a rope?

Yeah. Mr. Willis makes us do it

in gym class all the time. I mean, I hate it, but

I can do it.

Mr. Willis is still teaching?

Yeah.

(panting)

(sighs)

(door squeaks shut)

Well, welcome to the lab.

Cool.

Hopefully, these solar lights still work.

Yeah, you'll be safe here.

You sure?

Oh, yeah. No one can see us from the road,

and nobody in the whole world knows about this place,

except for me and my best friend.

We built it together.

After my mom died.

Mine did, too.

Yeah, I know.

(sighs)

After she died, I felt like my whole world fell apart.

I needed a place where I could

put things back together again.

After she passed, I felt like I'd never be safe again.

But this place...

this place made me feel safe.

And it's why I brought you here.

I need you to stay here, okay?

I'm gonna be back, I promise.

But...

I have to make sure these guys

don't bother you and your dad again,

and I can't do that if you're with me.

That's why I need you to stay here.

Hey, um, while I'm gone,

I want you to be my lookout.

It's the telescope I made.

I think it actually still works.

Just make sure to check for spiders.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Look... I know you're scared.

I would be, too.

It's all gonna be okay.

I promise.

And if you need me...

...just blow the whistle.

(engine humming outside)

(vehicle sputters, stops)

Okay.

After I leave, pull the rope up and stay quiet, okay?

(insects chirping and trilling)

Yikes!

Looks like you just bought yourself a minivan.

Yeah, turns out they put air filters on these things

for a reason. Who knew, right?

Good job back there, man.

So, where's the little girl at?

She's safe in the lab.

It's a tree house.

Yeah.

Bozer told me all about it. You two are adorable.

But listen, I got a feeling

these guys aren't too far behind me now.

And even if you can whip up a new set of intake valves

for this rassle castle, this thing

ain't gonna make it very far.

You do know that these punks

are never gonna leave these people alone, never.

Yeah. They're gonna follow Valerie and her dad

until something bad happens.

So either we move our skinny butts down here to Mission City

and start protecting these Lawsons full-time, or...

Or we come out with a plan.

Yeah. And Bozer's assured me that the Calvary's on its way,

but I don't think they're gonna make it here in time, so

what do you want to do here?

Give 'em what they want.

There.

Load up the cash. Let's get out of here.

- You sure this is gonna work? - Mostly.

- Mostly?! - Well, the speed of a chemical reaction

Is constant no matter how much

reactant is used. I just don't know if I left my ringer on.

- Your ringer might not be on? - About to find out.

(phone ringing)

Is that a phone?

What the hell is that?

(whooshing)

(tires squealing, whooshing)

(sighs)

Yeah. My man Geekachu does it again.

- What?! - (distant sirens wailing)

Yeah, if you were a Pokémon character,

that's what I'd call you. That or Nerdasaur.

I get it.

(sirens wailing)

What about Brainmander? Is he one of 'em?

Guys, I brought the cavalry.

(whoops, laughs)

Hey, Mac, did you know Donnie Sandoz became a cop?

Donnie.

Long time.

This is Donnie? Bully Donnie?

(garbled radio transmission)

I'm gonna have to punch a cop in the face then.

You have the right to remain silent. Anything...

BOZER: Hey, hey, Donnie, Donnie.

Come on, man. The real bad dudes are over there.

Maybe, but until I find out for sure,

everyone's going to jail.

Turn around, Angus.

JACK: Are you serious,

- man? - Bozer, Valerie's at the Lab.

We're on it, Mac.

Now this... (groans)

This feels like home.

So this is what happens when you go home for a relaxing weekend?

Oh, it was relaxing.

We just weren't expecting to break up a dangerous

- drug-smuggling ring, but... - Things happen.

- Mm-hmm. - THORNTON: With you two, something

Always happens.

BOZER: Uh,

you can thank Director Thornton for clearing up

your little misunderstanding with the police.

And making sure there were no charges

against Valerie's father.

It's amazing what this woman can do with a cold stare.

See what I mean?

Have the police found the rest of the gang yet?

Five-O's rounding up the last of them now.

Let me be clear. Next time something like this happens,

you call me. Bozer shouldn't be the only one answering my calls.

You've been sucking up, bro?

Does being a super spy and saving the day

always feel this good?

RILEY: Honestly?

I'm just amazed we're all still alive.

So, you think Mission City will

be seeing you again anytime soon?

Actually, if Mr. Ericson agrees, I was thinking about

making talking to his eighth graders an annual thing.

JACK: Oh, that's really sweet.

But I ain't chaperoning the next one, man.

You can get yourself killed down here.

Is that SUV from the rental place right by the office?

- Yeah, and there's a dozen more like it. - Really?

I got an invoice for that minivan you totaled.

Phoenix won't be paying for it. That's on you, Jack.

Yeah, we can talk about that. Let me drive the SUV.

Please?

Sweet.

Hey, I just need to make one stop first.

Yeah, all right.

Whoa. Whoa.

We're not going anywhere

until someone fills us in on the incident.

Yeah, I totally forgot about that. What happened?

Oh, yeah. Okay.

Did anyone happen to notice

the football field next to the school?

What football field?

Exactly. There was one.

Oh.

Before the incident.

Time out. So you two burned down the stadium?

Well, technically, it wasn't a fire.

It was more of a small nuclear meltdown.

Oh, I got to hear about this.

BOZER: Take the scenic route, Jack, 'cause it's a long story.

(door squeaks open)

(grunts, sighs)

You cleaned up.

You like it?

It looks amazing.

(sighs)

Good... 'cause it's all yours now.

Seriously?

Yeah, but you got to promise me three things.

One... come here. Often.

You think you're different,

but you're not.

One day you're gonna understand why you think the way you do.

Until then, use this place to expand your imagination.

Number two...

Be there for your dad.

Losing your mom was hard on you, I know.

Just don't forget... He lost her, too.

Don't let this tear you two apart.

Remember, you and your dad need each other right now.

I promise.

Number three...

If you or your dad ever need anything,

need any help, if you're ever in trouble,

or if you ever want to talk,

you can reach me here.

- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans - -- www.Addic7ed.com --