Original subtitles

Chinamen and Miniskirts

Ladies, gentlemen,

we're here to pay a final tribute

to a comrade of ours, one killed in action

- What is this? - It's the dead man!

Shoot!

Ready

Au revoir

See you later

- What is that? - It looks like a coffin

Hello. Alright..

Hello Commander

I assure you I understand perfectly how traffic can be a problem

but this is no way to come into my study

It was great fun sir, it's a good thing the helicopter pulled me out of that mess

Yes, of course, if I didn't watch out for all of you...

Don't forget to make a full written report

If you'd permit me sir, it's this one, the blue one

Yes yes, alright

- Nussak? - Commander, I'm surrounded, I need help

- I order you to hold on until help arrives - Make sure it's soon

Thank you Commander, I knew you wouldn't leave me in the lurch

Mr. Riviere, It seems your friend Nussak seems a bit uncomfortable, go help him

Where must I go sir?

Hey, Bruno

- How are you? - A mess

- You're having problems? - Some, but I think they're past now

You owe that to a guy named Paul Riviere

Well excuse me

Come on, move!

- Hey, your friends are late - And yours won't wait until tomorrow

Don't tell me you've seduced a Chinese girl and her family wants vengeance

Chinese girls are lovely

If they had told me this was the Boxer Rebellion,

I would have brought more ammo

Everything ran out at the same time, ammunition and Chinamen

Well where are we, in Paris or in China? Go on

Yes, we have to get out of here

- Look, we're in Paris - Come on, let's go

So explain this thing with the Chinese girl

and why you don't get along with her family

- Didn't the boss tell you anything? - No, we didn't have time

It's a strange matter, now we have to go rescue my chinagirl

Come on, don't tell me you're seriously in love with her like some dunce

And I'm not going to let you take her from me

You should see her, she's fantastic. Her name is Leila Wong

She was born in Shanghai to a French father and a Chinese mother

and the mixture is delicious

because Leila is a lovely girl,

with such hair, such eyes,

such a little nose, such a mouth,

two arms, a waist...

She's had her shots,

two legs,

- very complete - Yes, she has everything

Come on lad, wake up, where are we going with this?

You've betrayed us Leila,

you've sold us to the westerners

I like the western world but I've never betrayed my own people

Very well

I'll test you to see if what you say is true.

If you're still one of us Leila, tell me, where is the perfume flask?

What perfume flask?

You know very well which I mean

- I don't know anything - Really?

- No - Very well,

then I'll explain

That perfume was stolen in Hong Kong

from the man who was supposed to give it to me

and it contains something very important to us

I assure you I haven't received anything!

As you wish, you'll end up telling us

I'm Dr. Kung, and I belong to the ancient sect of the Red Scorpion

Our projects are ambitious, to dominate the world

We've inherited the spirit of battle

and rebelliousness of the old Boxers

Peace is for the weak,

we are warriors and we must achieve what our ancestors couldn't do

You've searched my house and didn't find anything,

I'm telling you you I don't have that perfume flask

- I need that perfume - I don't have it

- We have ways of convincing you - No, don't torture me more

Two of my men will take care of you and they'll make you talk

It's useless, how do you want me to tell you what I don't know?

Perfectly

Since children they were trained in the science

of making humans tell us what we want to know

Take care of her, make her tell us where the perfume flask is

Who are you?

I'm Bruno Nussak and that's my friend Paul Riviere

Now I remember, Bruno Nussak,

then you're a friend of my cousin Christian Gover

Exactly, it was he that asked us for help

- Where is he now? - I'm sorry Miss

- What do you mean? - He's dead

- Who killed him? - Those friends of yours

He saw how those Chinese took you and followed them here

He called us and I came to help him

If I couldn't get here sooner it's because more Chinamen popped up,

thankfully my friend came and helped me

And how will we get out of here?

The same way we came in. After you

- Alright - That's it then

You're very efficient

We have to be or else we'd need some replacement skin

- Now me - Baby?

This is Dr. Kung speaking. You won't leave this place alive

The smoothest voice in the Orient advertising his best chewing gum

- I'll make you eat those words - I'm already chewing them

- You're a bunch of meddlers - How did you know?

I'll give you a lesson you'll never forget!

- I bet he wants to kill us - You can be assured!

You're contradicting yourself, if you kill us we won't have time to learn

- This way - No, it's not that way, it's this way

Come on,come on!

- Where's that famous perfume? - I don't have it

Dr. Kung took it but it wasn't the one he was looking for

Tell me something Leila,

how do you know it wasn't the real one?

My cousin told me in his letter,

my other cousin, Wang from Hong Kong,

he also said he was sending me other identical flasks of perfume

One of them was sent to Sonia Bellford

- Does Kung know? - I suppose so,

they've searched my entire flat

Who's Sonia Bellford?

I only know she works in a club in Montmartre

Commander Fernion, Paul Rivere here,

I want you to make a diplomatic protest,

Paris is full of Chinamen.

We're after a flask of perfume

that apparently contains a very secret secret,

naturally we don't know what it's about, that's why it's still a secret

As soon as we get it we'll bring it to you, alright? Over

Let's go see Sonia Bellford

but first you should change, maybe your miniskirt is too much

- Any Chinese on the coast? - I don't see any

- Excuse me, who's Sonia Bellford? - She's the one singing

Bruno, wait for me here

- Wouldn't it be better if I go with you? - I'll call you if I need you

- A whiskey - Yes sir

- Hello, how are you? - Waiting for you

Did you get bored?

I know this oar very well, will you let me borrow it to go down the Seine?

I want you to know your proposition doesn't interest me in the least Mister

Paul Riviere, and changing the subject,

have you received a flask of perfume from Hong Kong?

I don't share my family's secrets

We think alike Sonia, we're made for each other.

Our love is the only thing that's sacred, the only thing that's true

You're completely mad

Sonia my love, we'll be very happy, we'll have lots of children, the future is ours

What nuthouse did you escape from?

What a shame,

I always prefer blondes

Sonia, you must have received a flask of perfume from Hong Kong,

the merchandise is pure dynamite and you're in grave danger

You think so?

Did you see the girl that came in with me?

- Yes,she's chinese - She's Wong's cousin,

the one who sent you the perfume.

The Red Scorpion or something like that is involved,

but I'll defend you. They like playing some mean tricks

And who's going to defend me from you?

What's the meaning of this?

The boys from the Red Scorpion my love

Let me introduce their leader Dr. Kung

I'm very glad you recognized me

I'm also very glad to see you again, oh honorable assassin

It's funny you'd say that after eliminating so many of my men

Just a few dozen, nothing more

Mr. Riviere, put your hands over your head

There

Enough jokes. This is a hand grenade

and I believe you'd prefer not to see me obligated to make it explode

We wanted an autograph, are we interrupting?

- No no, come in - Would it be a bother Ms. Bellford?

Close the door

Put your hands over your heads

And now, where is your perfume jar?

Which of them? I have several

Well well, I see you have a sense of humor

Well now, what a pleasant reunion

- Up with your hands - Obey

We were just starting to have fun

Where is the perfume they sent you from Hong Kong?

I've already told you I have several

You know perfectly well which one I'm looking for.

Tell me where you have it

That one isn't here, it's at my house

Alright, then we'll go there,

but these gentlemen won't be coming with us

After you Ms. Bellford

I'm sorry my love, if you had listened to me we'd be rowing down the Seine

Let's go!

- Close it - There it goes!

Hurry!

Sonia!

How are you Paul?

Quite well, considering how tough my life is

Let's go to your place for the perfume,

those guys have a bit of a headstart on us

- Don't worry, they won't find it - Where is it?

It's in my purse

- Blessed be the ingenuity of women - We got lucky

Now that there are four of us why don't we go get dinner somewhere?

I'd love to but first we have to go see the Commander

You think it's funny? I had to speak to the police

and use all my authority so you wouldn't be arrested

It's not such a big deal, we didn't throw the bomb

and we got the perfume

You're always getting me into trouble.

Let's see that famous perfume

Good job boys

Unfortunately this isn't the flask we're after

It says here that the real one hasn't left Hong Kong

and it must contain more than perfume,

since it's cost the life of one of our men

I'm sorry Miss, I have bad news for you

Your other cousin Wong has been found in Hong Kong

- Dead? - Yes, drowned

Before dying he sent you two, and perhaps other people,

the perfumes you received

There's no doubt he was trying to confuse the people watching him and make time

It was no good, they killed the poor man before he completed his brilliant service

I still don't know what this is about, but prepare to leave tonight for Hong Kong

- What, after the day we've had? - I have a date tonight

You'll be leaving on the first flight,

there you'll make contact with Francoise Moreau

who hangs out in a cabaret called the Ace of Hearts. Have a good trip

Alright, and what do we do with the girls?

Don't worry, these ladies will be under my special protection,

I'll see to them personally

- Good luck - Have fun

I'll be sure to

This is Captain Morgan.

We're flying at an altitude of 8000 meters

with a cabin pressure equivalent to 1500 meters.

in approximately one hour we'll land in Hong Kong

Leila, my love

Come on man, stop dreaming of Leila, we're almost to Hong Kong

I had made a dinner date with her

Well I think you'll be eating alone because I've just found some company

- Is that more comfortable? - Yes, thank you very much

Candy?

- Does the gentleman want candies? - No

- I like these better - So do I

Want to get together for dinner tonight?

Excuse me, they're calling me

Hey listen, do you know a fun spot in-

So I'm having dinner alone, am I?

She didn't even notice you

Pay attention, everyone stay calm and remain in their seats,

- this is a hold up - Don't move

- We've traveled with the entire orchestra - Well tell them not to start the concert

That only depends on you Mr. Riviere. To the cockpit

What are you planning?

Can't you guess? A brief change of itinerary

I'll complain to the company, we paid for passage to Hong Kong

You'll never arrive in Hong Kong

- Please, would you permit me to smoke? - No, I won't permit it

For a musician you're quite rude

We already know many of your tricks Mr. Riviere,

and we prefer not to take any risks

That's a good idea

You see? Life is full of tricks Come on!

and there's no point in taking risks

How are you going to get into the cockpit?

I don't know. Wait

Put it on her

- Is the incident over? - Yes, completely over

- Paris calling flight 312 - Mr. Riviere, a call from Paris

Thank you

- Riviere here - Listen Paul, this is your commander

- Oh, joy - Quit it with the foolishness

- Things are looking bad - What?

- They've kidnapped the girls? - How could such a thing happen?

They came into the building saying they were going to fix the television antenna

and they killed the guards.

This business is costing us a lot of people

Do you realize what this means for you?

Yes, especially if they make the girls talk

We're looking for them, but I'm afraid they've already taken them out of France

This matter is getting bad for us, if we don't come back look for us in the cemetery

I'm sorry, but you'll have to continue with your mission until the end

- I figured as much - Good luck

- Please, don't send us flowers - Yes. Out

Here. Where's Bruno?

He went to see what happened to the stewardesses

I'll buy a lovely outfit for the one who has dinner with me tonight

So what do you say dolls?

I'm sorry I have to ruin your dinner plans with such fine company,but

- we have a meeting with the Red Scorpion - But they're enthusiastic about the idea

And I took all that time convincing them

Here

This must be the place

Go on ahead

Hello beautiful

Would you like to have a drink?

- No, I can't - Maybe later tonight?

No, it's impossible, I have a date

Hello, how are you? What are you doing around here?

It's been such a long time

- Seems like a fine place - It does

- What's your name? - Strawberries-in-Bloom

To tell the truth, you don't taste like strawberries

- And you? - Peachflower

She should be called Peachflower

- Where's the boss? - In her office,

but she doesn't see men

She doesn't know what she's missing

You taste like strawberries to me

But you, you don't taste like peach

My name is Paul Riviere and this is my partner Bruno Nussak

We're agents of the Strategic Investigation Bureau of the French government

and we've just arrived from Paris Ms. Moreau

Your credentials please

Your right credential is very interesting

So's the left one

- Should we check the rest? - It's unanimous

- I asked for your credentials - Didn't you like them?

- You think you're funny - Try mine

If you try it again you'll be leaving in an ambulance

As you like, but I have to tell you it might be a forgery,

though a very good one

So how will I know you're the people you claim to be?

A chinaman by the name of Wong

got his hands on a perfume bottle whose contents must be very important,

and to throw off his pursuers

he sent many identical bottles all around the world,

but he gave you the real one

His plan had a certain amount of success,

because even if he was killed the chinamen looking for it went as far as Paris.

Is that enough or do you need to see the birthmark I have tucked away.

No, there's no need, what you say is true

A shame, we'll have to leave the birthmark for tonight

Your jokes don't amuse me, can't you be serious?

Ms. Moreau, Mr. Riviere isn't a serious man.

Hold it, put your hands up

Who are you and how did you get in here?

Through the back alley,

and I'm the person you're going to give the perfume flask to

- Do you understand now Francoise? - No, and I won't give anyone the perfume

I'm pointing at your stomach.

The wound will be painful and you won't die quickly

In exchange for the perfume I'll allow you to call a doctor

Don't be stubborn Francoise, give him what he wants

- Alright - Where is it?

I keep it in the safe, behind that scroll

Bring it out

Out of the way

Come on, get away from there

Then how do you expect me to give it to you?

Come on now

Watch the door, we wouldn't want the place to be overrun by Chinese

Do you know what's in here?

I've never opened it. Wong told me never to open it

and to keep it safe until someone sent by Sonia Bellford came for it

He told me that it'd be better for me not to know what was inside

- Then it's better that you don't see it - I want to see

Well, you know best

- It looks like brains - Yes, it's strange

- Can you translate this? - Yes

Dr. Angus Cronwell, ribonucleic acid,

14th St, number 185, New York city

- Yes? - This is Dr. Kung

Who did you say?

Tell Mr. Riviere to get on the line

My, Dr. Kung is getting serious again

Riviere here, go on

You and your friend will go to the place I'm about to indicate

No Dr. Kung, I'm sorry but it's impossible,

I have a date with a very pretty girl

and I'm not about to give her up for you

Mr. Riviere, do I need to remind you

that I have in my custody,

Leila Wong and Sonia Bellford?

- What do you want? - The perfume flask,

in exchange I'll give you the two women

I don't think I have a choice

That's what I like Mr. Riviere.

All you have to do is follow my messengers instructions,

he'll take you to our meeting place. See you soon

What did he want now?

For us to bring him the perfume and in exchange he'll give us the girls

He'll end up with everything, the girls and the perfume

That's what he's planning

I'm warning you, I only have one head

That's what you get for being poor

Can I help with something?

Of course, when this is all over I have a free evening ahead of me

Me too

It'd be best if you got out of Hong Kong for a few days

It's impossible, I have no choice but to look after my business

As you like.

Perhaps our friend Kung will leave you alone if he manages to get a hold of us,

though I doubt it

- Ciao - So long lovely

Come on

- Do you always do things halfway? - Always

Which one am I seeing tonight?

- Me - No, me

Hey, taxi. Come on

- Where to? - The junk dock

- You heard him - Very well

What sort of acid is that Paul?

Ribonucleic acid, it's a substance we have in here

that soaks the parts of our brain where our memory resides

I'm still clueless

You're speaking Chinese, explain yourself better

It's a very recent discovery.

They've done experiments with rats, monkeys and other animals,

getting them accustomed to certain stimuli like lights or sounds

Later the ribonucleic acid from the animals that reacted to these sounds was extracted

and injected to other animals that weren't experimented on, these then responded

to the stimuli, reacting in an identical manner

You mean that someones reflexes, that is, someone's memory can be transferred?

Exactly

And what happens to someone who's ribo-whatever acid is extracted?

They die immediately, at least that's what happened in the experiments on animals

- And the one that's injected? - They live a few hours

- So then there's a few hours - Yes

Good evening gentlemen, I see you've been punctual about our meeting and I'm glad,

you don't know how happy I am that we're meeting again

- Get to the point please - Alright Mr. Riviere,

we'll get right to the point, but first put your hands up please

- What for? - Disarm them!

We didn't come to play cops and robbers

I brought the perfume and you're supposed to give me the two girls, wasn't that the deal?

Yes, that was it. Give me the perfume flask

The girls first

Don't worry, you'll be seeing them soon

Why does perfume interest you so much?

In Paris they make the best in the world, right Bruno?

Don't you understand?

It's very simple, one needs a lot of perfume

to deal with the stink of opium

Your friend thinks he's very ingenious, doesn't he?

It really does smell bad here, I liked the smoke you had in Paris better

Enough, let's dispense with this foolishness.

- Give me that perfume - First the girls

Tell me, do you know the contents of this message?

No, I haven't had the time to learn Chinese

Yes, you don't know Chinese,

but there was someone with you who knows our language,

don't you remember?

Francoise!

We've given you what you wanted, give us the girls

You westerners will never understand

What is it we should understand?

Go down where they are

- You must die - Finish us off, but set them free

You must all die, you all know too much,

and this flask's contents have cost us dearly

We had to sacrifice one of our purest thinkers to utilize his brain

In case you're interested, the contents of this jar

will be injected into the Secretary of Defense of a powerful nation,

who in this manner will find himself obliged to serve our ends

Bruno, untie the girls, I'll go get Francoise

How are you Francoise? Chin up

- Hurry - So long

After me

Come on, they're heading that way

Hit him! Hit him!

Take this!

Play with each other

Now we'll see

- Is this yours? - Yes,thank you

Follow me

- You have to grab on to the cords - I don't know how to swim!

You'll never learn Bruno

He's disappeared

- That was stupendous - How are you Paul?

Very well. Forgive me, won't you? Goodnight

Come on

This way

What is this?

- Tell me, where's Paul? - He's over that way, come on

Excuse me

- I'm sorry, I'm sorry - Isn't there a better place to walk?

- I prefer white girls, baby - Hold it stud

What are you doing? What's going on?

Come here! Take this,dog!

Come on, hurry up!

They've left you cold? Come with me

- Me? - Yes

Please, where's the exit, we're in a hurry

Hold it, you stay here with me, alright?

I have to kill you!

You too? Into the drink

Well done

- Watch out! - And more

- Help them, they're going to be killed! - Calm down,calm down

Get us out of here please, get us out of here!

I want this one, this one's mine!

Who do I hit now?

Come on, come on, out

- Well what do we do now? - We'll have to go to New York

Are the ones on that terrace friends of yours?

Perhaps, but not all of them are going to belong to the Red Scorpion

Here you have Manhattan, with the tallest buildings in the world

Yes, alright, alright

This is a very peaceful place, I ask you not to make a racket

Alright, alright

Busy

Do you have any suggestions?

- Of course - I'll call the Commander

It's so absurd he won't believe us

Maybe things won't turn out like you think

Alright man, I'll call the big boss

Hello? Miss, I'd like to make a call to Paris. Yes

Number? Elysee 8321. Yes, I'll wait

- Open up, it's us - No, no Miss

With who? With Frank Sinatra?

- You have a call from New York? - What's going on in New York?

I don't know, anything could happen there.

They say Frank Sinatra's going to call you

My friend Frankie? Bring me the phone

Her health is a bit delicate and she's lost a lot of strength

No one would notice, she's very fine... ly developed

She seems intelligent

No Miss, I don't want to speak with Hollywood

Yes I'll wait Pour me a whiskey

Yes Miss, now we're talking

Water it down a little

- It isn't Frank Sinatra's voice sir - How do you know?

- It's Paul Riviere's - That's not possible, Paul is in Hong Kong

- Who is this? - Paul sir

What? What are you doing in New York?

Don't tell me you took the wrong flight

No sir, we were in Hong Kong, and though things got ugly

- Do you like it like that? - we nearly achieved our objective

Now I get it, you finished your mission and decided to take a vacation on your own

- No, it's not that chief - Get to the point, don't take all morning

They're going to inoculate the American Secretary of Defense, RNA

What the hell are you talking about?

What do we have to do with the Secretary of Defense

- and what will they inject him with? - Ribonucleic acid

- Listen Paul... - I said ribonucleic acid chief

- Are you crazy? - No

What do I care what sort of vitamins the American Secretary of Defense takes?

He can take whichever he wants, I bet he needs them

RNA or ribonucleic acid is the transmitting element

that stimulates the brain cells where our memory resides. To be honest chief,

- it might do you some good - What are you saying?

That if they inject the Secretary of Defense with it he'll start thinking differently

They took it out of someone else? I still don't get it, who did the extracting?

Our friends, the ones from the Red Scorpion

That was the message in the real perfume flask

and that's why Bruno and I are in New York with the three girls

- Three girls? - Yes, Sonia, Leila and Francoise.

I think you should ask the CIA for help

- The CIA? - Yes, the American intelligence agency

I know very well what the CIA is but I'm not about to ask them for help

Do you think I've gone mad too?

Where did you get the idea they're going to change the Secretary of Defense's memory?

I don't believe a word of this RNA story,

you must be confused Paul. Listen, couldn't this RNA thing be a new detergent brand?

No, I have many things to do and what you've told me is stupid, absurd

Alright chief, then I have no choice than to act on my own

I expressly forbid it

But the fact that they'll change the American Secretary of Defense's will is dangerous

Who knows, it's possible the change will do him good

What are you talking about chief?

Nothing, forget that story and return to Paris on the first flight, that's an order

- And what do I do with the girls? - What do I care?

Don't get it into your head to bring them here, we don't pay for tourist trips

- Alright - That student is promising

Promising? Who's promising? Which of the students chief?

None of your business. I'm very busy, I'm hanging up

Now you've done it, we have to return to Paris immediately

I'm sleeping in a bed tonight

Orders from the chief, he didn't believe us

Great, just one night we could have slept peacefully,

besides, I can't keep going on like this Paul

Ah Bruno, that's your problem, mine is to make sure nothing happens to our American

- What can we do? - You stay here, I'm leaving

- Where to? - To pay a visit to Dr. Angus Cronwell

Isn't that the one who was going to inject the secretary with RNA?

That's what I want to find out.

Don't move from here and keep your eyes peeled

I won't be held responsible if they stay in the bathroom

Open up!

To 18514th St

- Hello - Hello

- Do you have an appointment? - No

Then you'll have to come another day, Mr...

Paul Riviere

- Would Thursday at 5 be good Mr. Riviere? - No

- Friday at 11? - No

- I'm sorry, but... - It has to be tonight,

maybe you and I could have dinner

- Weren't you here to see Dr. Cronwell? - Oh yes, I had forgotten

I'm afraid you'll have to wait until next week

You see Miss, I have to be in Paris tomorrow and I can't wait

I'll see what I can do. Let me speak to the doctor

The doctor will see you now

You still haven't told me if you'll have dinner with me tonight Pamela

Let me remind you that tonight you'll be on a flight to Paris

Who knows?

Sit Mr. Riviere,

and I beg you to be as direct as possible, I don't have much time

I suffer from frequent memory loss Doctor,

and they've told me you could carry out

a new treatment based on RNA

What?

Ribonucleic acid, extracted from someone with a memory superior to mine

You're very well informed on the latest medical discoveries,

but RNA is still in the testing phase,

I don't know of any case

in which that experiment was carried out on human beings

If my reports are accurate then you're the one that's going to do that experiment

with one of this country's important figures

Mr. Riviere, from what you're telling me your case is very interesting,

I'll have to study it more closely

Please, be so kind as to sit there

- Get comfortable - Don't tell me you didn't know anything

Who gives you your orders? Dr. Kung or is there someone above him?

Your case is very interesting.

Come, lay down and explain everything slowly

Relax

When you plan to inject the RNA into the Secretary of Defense

you'll have to choose the moment carefully,

you know he won't live long after the injection

What are you doing Mr. Riviere? Calm down,

it's just a stethoscope, you've gone mad!

Forgive me

This gadget is completely harmless

I'm sorry Doctor, I must be mistaken

You're very agitated, here, I'll give you a sedative

No thank you Doctor

I advise you to seek treatment as soon as possible

Some other day

Doctor, these gentlemen are waiting for you

Put your hands up

or I won't leave one Chinese to talk about it. Inside

You too Doctor

Drop the gun

I'm afraid we won't be having dinner together tonight

Go on, take him away

You see how expensive a kiss can be

- Where are they taking Mr. Riviere? - That's none of your business

Go inside

- Keep going and don't stop - Where are we going?

None of your business

- But- - Keep going. Obey

Heights give me vertigo

- Jump - Hold on a minute boys-

I told you to jump!

Well, if you're so dead set on me jumping...

here I go!

I have vertigo, I have vertigo!

What are you doing here?

Where did you come from? This is a private terrace

Don't mind me Enjoy yourselves

Excuse me, I need a drink, thanks

- Bon appetite - Thanks

- Who was that? - The plumber

- I'm telling you it's raining Chinamen - They didn't come from here

Where am I?

I like it

- Three dollars of the same - With tip

- What are you doing? - You owe me six dollars

How dare you?

The doctor!

Dangers of the profession. Those who live by the sword...

It's horrible

Take it easy Pamela, I can wait before charging you

What are you doing?

- That was free - We have to call the police

Hey, hold on a minute!

- Wait! Don't call the police - Why not? Who are you?

Paul Riviere, agent of the French Counter-espionage agency

You have to help me, I need to know who your boss confided in

- His assistants, Drs. Brown and Hutchkiss - Call Dr. Brown

- Are you a nurse? - Yes

I'd like you to look after me for a while after this is all over

- Dr. Brown? - Yes, what is it?

- Have you received the ribonucleic acid? - What are you talking about Dr. Cronwell?

I haven't received anything? What acid?

Be a good girl and call the other one

I don't understand a thing

What a shame, I'm afraid we won't be able to have dinner together

- Dr. Hutchkiss? - He's not in New York,

he left this morning for Paris

didn't you know? I told you so myself-

Well this is just great. If you learn something I'm at 20824th St

Hey Paul, you can't leave me alone!

What am I supposed to tell the police when they arrive?

That the yellow menace arrived

- It was all useless - What will we do now?

No idea, everything's failed.

We'll follow the chief's orders and return to Paris,

besides, I have the feeling some Chinaman has followed me here

How strange, who could it be?

I don't know, but those Chinese work on commission.

Open it, I'll cover you

Paul, I thought they'd kill me before I got here

- Who are you talking about? - The Chinese

Didn't I tell you Bruno?

Before the police arrived Dr. Hutchkiss' secretary called me

and said that they had received the acid I sent,

- but I hadn't sent anything - The Chinamen must have sent it,

Dr. Hutchkiss is the one who's going to inject RNA into the Secretary of Defense.

Dr. Hutchkiss has gone to Paris, so they're planning to do it there

Yes, we're heading back on the first flight,

- quickly, before they show up - Hurry up girls

They've started showing up

I bet they'll even be popping in through the windows

What is this, are they drunk? Don't you know that noise is forbidden?

What a mess! A nice party you've had here, all the neighbors are complaining

- Move it, we're leaving - What do I do now?

The best thing you can do is come with us

if you don't want the Chinamen to use you as a pincushion

Hurry, you're part of the gang now, that's how you'll see Paris

- Hurry, hurry! - Coming

Hurry up girl, we're going to Paris. Come on

Sonia, Leila

Go on, hurry up! Quickly, quickly!

Ladies, I've had you gathered here

for a small and friendly ceremony

in which we'll reward the merits of one of your companions.

Nicole Moulies, step forward

I award you with the sporting medal, specialist in Judo

- We'll celebrate it tonight - We're here Chief

Just a minute, can't you see I'm busy?

- at Chez Castel - Come in girls

What is this? I told you not to bring your personal harem

Step into my office

I also wanted to take advantage of this magnificent occasion to say a few words

We're France's security, counter-espionage... well, you know

Dismissed

We were right, the American Secretary of Defense is going to be inoculated with RNA

and the operation will be carried out here, in Paris

You're still going on about that nonsense?

Dr. Hutchkiss came from New York for it

That's the most absurd story I've heard in my life,

changing a person's memory, what do you take me for, an idiot?

Carry out an investigation

When do you think they'll do it? I can't investigate nonsense,

the Secretary of Defense is in Paris to attend the NATO meeting

which will take place tomorrow afternoon

And suppose that Dr. Hutchkiss is the medic accompanying the secretary

No, he isn't, the doctor that came with him is called Frederick Jackson

Chief, give me a chance, find out where Dr. Gordon Hutchkiss is staying

Information?

Find out where in Paris Dr. Gordon Hutchkiss is lodging immediately

He arrived from New York yesterday

American yes, he arrived from New York yesterday

Information? What was that?

Oh yes, Chez Castel, a table for two for tonight

What? Yes, he arrived yesterday

Hotel Gallia. Alright

You're right, he's in the Hotel Gallia, room 234

Commander, I request authorization to go to the Hotel Gallia

Authorization denied

You must realize the enormous importance of our mission,

we're determined to provoke a third world war

- Please Dr. Kung - What's the matter?

During your absence we've received a telephone call from New York

- Wonderful, it must be good news - No Dr. Kung

The French agents killed many of our men

- It can't be - and they managed to escape

In any case they won't have time to slow our plans down

Moments before the NATO meeting begins,

the Secretary of Defense will feel briefly indisposed,

we already have that well prepared. Because of that they'll call his doctor,

and it will be you, Dr. Hutchkiss, who will attend him

Let's step into the other room

We had no choice but to eliminate Dr. Cronwell,

the French agents knew his identity

and that was very dangerous for us

A perfect job.

Let me introduce Dr. Jackson

The resemblance is uncanny

I'm glad you feel that way And now let's go,

your patient is waiting for you

Is there a danger something may happen to your patient

- when you give him the injection? - No, we've studied him well.

He's a very healthy man, he won't feel any effects until four hours have passed

- And will he die? - Well, around midnight

There's more than enough time for our plans

- We'll wait for you outside - Very well

- And the real Dr. Jackson? - We kidnapped him as he left his hotel

I understand

He'll suffer a regrettable car accident when this is all over

- Should I turn the television on? - Yes, turn it on

...in Paris has stirred a enormous interest and great expectations due mainly to the

speech the American Secretary of Defense will give.

We're seeing representatives of various European nations go by.

As you know, these NATO meetings are secret

The importance of this latest one has caused it's retransmission to be broadcast

not just in Europe

but in every NATO member country and through satellite to every nation.

It seems that the speech the American Secretary of Defense will give

will be a historic moment for NATO meetings,which as we said

have lately taken place in Paris

The great figures of international politics are appearing like starlets on your screens,

also conscious that the cameras will be recording this historic event

We've just been giving a note stating that the American secretary is briefly indisposed

We hope that this indisposition is truly momentary and won't impede him

from giving his historic speech to the assembly gathered here.

Stay tuned to our transmission-

It's nothing

Please, leave us alone

Yes, let's go

Shut the door

It seems that the Defense Secretary has fortunately recovered

from his brief indisposition which provoked alarm as you could see in our transmission

and now he will give his expected speech to the assembly

Ministers of the NATO council,

at present and despite its operations in Vietnam,

the US can maintain it's full military combat strength in Europe

as it is vital for its safety

that no potentially hostile country dominate the area

I congratulate you Dr. Hutchkiss, you've done marvelous work.

We've been watching from here

I'm sure that this will be a historic speech that will surprise everyone.

Drive

...it's possible that in the years to come Communist China will expand its borders

We can't ignore this, but we must guide China towards peace,

Speaking of peace? What's going on?

I don't understand, didn't you inject the RNA just a moment ago?

I got confused, I injected him with live oil, that has more vitamins

Careful Dr. Kung, don't move or I'll splatter you against the seat

How did you do it?

It's very simple Dr. Kung, with that.

I used the same system to take Dr. Jackson's place

- Where's Dr. Hutchkiss? - Detained

- What will you do with me? - I'm afraid your future is uncertain

Let me return to Hong Kong

- You wouldn't go to Hong Kong - Why do you say that?

Your people will sentence you to death

You've failed, you missed your big opportunity

and they won't give you another

On the other hand, we aren't willing to let you keep sending Chinamen

door to door all over the world

It seems I've lost the game this time

So you thought you could beat me, eh? You've only won the first round

- You still aren't convinced? - Shoot!

Well Chinagirl, what did you want to do with me?

Don't you know I'm phenomenal with the ladies?

- Let go, let me go! - Don't be so pushy,

don't you realize you've just lost a boss?

Don't be silly, you have to think of your future

Come with me

- More, more - All that you want

I still can't believe I have a woman in my arms

- Tonight is ours, both of ours - I want more

Finally alone

Not tonight! Alright,

I see you have great timing. Let me introduce Shan Tung

Leila, Sonia, Francoise and...

Nicole Moulies - Nicole Moulies, is she a new recruit?

- Where's Pamela? - She's having dinner with the Commander

Pamela too huh? Rank is one thing, him keeping them all is another

He doesn't spare a single one

I have instructions from the Commander

- to take them all to his house - What?

- Even this one? - Yes, all of them

Come on

- What fun - It's a shame

I'm sorry beautiful

Maybe some other day

I have an idea the Commander will remember his whole life

Well then, let's toast to your idea

Drink, it's not exactly whiskey, but...

Hopefully next time you'll have better ideas

What else could we do?

Hey Bruno, isn't that the Commander?

- Do you know the girl with him? - No

I'd say I've seen her before

Translation: Turdis May 2010