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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,452 --> 00:00:08,420 [dramatic music] 2 00:00:08,454 --> 00:00:15,161 ♪ 3 00:00:15,194 --> 00:00:17,329 I love these little kinds of projects. 4 00:00:17,363 --> 00:00:20,832 They give me something to do to keep my mind occupied. 5 00:00:20,866 --> 00:00:23,468 When I lost my ferro rod, I wanted to go home. 6 00:00:23,501 --> 00:00:24,970 I need to get my head back in the game 7 00:00:25,003 --> 00:00:26,437 if I'm gonna do this. 8 00:00:26,471 --> 00:00:28,740 A lot of bear activity right here, and, you know, 9 00:00:28,774 --> 00:00:30,809 predators aren't something to trifle with. 10 00:00:30,842 --> 00:00:33,078 Caught my first fish in my net. 11 00:00:33,111 --> 00:00:35,245 Dinner tonight, man. 12 00:00:35,279 --> 00:00:36,981 Whoo! 13 00:00:37,014 --> 00:00:39,383 Who are you when everything's been stripped away? 14 00:00:39,416 --> 00:00:40,951 [bleep]. 15 00:00:40,985 --> 00:00:42,586 [yelping] 16 00:00:42,619 --> 00:00:44,789 It's scary out here in these woods. 17 00:00:44,822 --> 00:00:46,923 I have not had a serious meal in a week. 18 00:00:46,956 --> 00:00:49,392 If I can't get a fire, then I can't stay here. 19 00:00:49,425 --> 00:00:50,860 It's always in the back of your mind, 20 00:00:50,894 --> 00:00:52,528 "Well, I could tap out." 21 00:00:52,561 --> 00:00:54,330 Putting up with this filming [bleep]? 22 00:00:54,363 --> 00:00:56,265 Running into a predator, it's not an if. 23 00:00:56,299 --> 00:00:57,333 It's a when. 24 00:00:57,366 --> 00:00:58,467 Get the hell out of here. 25 00:00:58,501 --> 00:01:00,402 I see you. Get out of here! 26 00:01:00,435 --> 00:01:02,404 I'm living a hand-to-mouth existence. 27 00:01:02,437 --> 00:01:03,638 Yes! Ah! 28 00:01:03,672 --> 00:01:05,373 $500,000 is a lot of money. 29 00:01:05,407 --> 00:01:06,909 It's just gonna keep getting harder. 30 00:01:06,942 --> 00:01:08,510 It's not the world that needs to change. 31 00:01:08,543 --> 00:01:10,713 It's me that needs to change. 32 00:01:10,746 --> 00:01:13,047 [moans] 33 00:01:13,080 --> 00:01:21,088 ♪ 34 00:01:36,903 --> 00:01:39,872 [birds chirping] 35 00:01:39,905 --> 00:01:42,007 ♪ 36 00:01:42,041 --> 00:01:45,410 Hey, so I'm traveling 37 00:01:45,444 --> 00:01:48,080 and exploring the, uh, 38 00:01:48,113 --> 00:01:51,582 the knoll behind and up above my camp. 39 00:01:51,615 --> 00:01:52,984 So check it out. 40 00:01:53,017 --> 00:01:55,486 Just right down 41 00:01:55,519 --> 00:01:57,922 from the kitchen area, 42 00:01:57,956 --> 00:02:01,059 oh, about 50 feet away. 43 00:02:01,092 --> 00:02:04,295 ♪ 44 00:02:04,327 --> 00:02:06,696 And there is this root 45 00:02:06,730 --> 00:02:08,565 that's turned right here 46 00:02:08,598 --> 00:02:12,369 and covered with soft moss, 47 00:02:12,402 --> 00:02:14,271 And... 48 00:02:14,304 --> 00:02:15,538 ♪ 49 00:02:15,572 --> 00:02:19,575 There is a hole 50 00:02:19,608 --> 00:02:21,577 in there. 51 00:02:21,610 --> 00:02:26,115 Man, this is the perfect toilet. 52 00:02:26,148 --> 00:02:27,649 [chuckles] 53 00:02:27,683 --> 00:02:29,618 I can take care of business 54 00:02:29,651 --> 00:02:31,019 right here, 55 00:02:31,052 --> 00:02:33,188 and I'm just gonna kind of pan around 56 00:02:33,221 --> 00:02:34,622 so you can see 57 00:02:34,655 --> 00:02:36,858 where I've been hiking. 58 00:02:36,892 --> 00:02:39,160 So I'm just gonna explore around. 59 00:02:39,194 --> 00:02:41,296 If I see anything interesting, I'll show you. 60 00:02:41,329 --> 00:02:47,835 ♪ 61 00:02:47,868 --> 00:02:50,604 So just all along the shore here, 62 00:02:50,637 --> 00:02:53,974 I anticipate finding stuff. 63 00:02:54,008 --> 00:02:55,409 ♪ 64 00:02:55,442 --> 00:02:57,610 I'm hoping to find a fair number 65 00:02:57,643 --> 00:02:59,813 of plastic bottles 66 00:02:59,846 --> 00:03:03,917 that I can use to store the food 67 00:03:03,950 --> 00:03:06,085 that I--that I'm hoping I can preserve. 68 00:03:06,119 --> 00:03:07,453 Catch some fish. 69 00:03:07,486 --> 00:03:10,122 ♪ 70 00:03:10,155 --> 00:03:12,757 As I'm standing here, 71 00:03:12,791 --> 00:03:16,694 I see something. 72 00:03:16,728 --> 00:03:17,863 Look at that. 73 00:03:17,896 --> 00:03:21,867 That's a gigantic plastic container. 74 00:03:21,900 --> 00:03:24,435 Man, this is just awesome. 75 00:03:24,468 --> 00:03:27,038 I mean, it's context, right? 76 00:03:27,071 --> 00:03:29,340 I would otherwise be disappointed 77 00:03:29,373 --> 00:03:31,742 to find this kind of trash 78 00:03:31,775 --> 00:03:33,610 on a beautiful beach like this, 79 00:03:33,644 --> 00:03:35,346 but because I'm surviving alone 80 00:03:35,379 --> 00:03:37,080 on North Vancouver Island, 81 00:03:37,113 --> 00:03:40,216 oh, man, this is a score. 82 00:03:41,517 --> 00:03:44,187 I am really excited about this. 83 00:03:44,220 --> 00:03:46,356 ♪ 84 00:03:46,389 --> 00:03:49,558 So I--I'm thinking 85 00:03:49,591 --> 00:03:52,694 of making a boat out of the black tub, 86 00:03:52,727 --> 00:03:56,065 and if the weather will allow me, 87 00:03:56,098 --> 00:03:57,799 you know, tying some outriggers to it 88 00:03:57,833 --> 00:03:59,201 to help stabilize it. 89 00:03:59,234 --> 00:04:01,903 ♪ 90 00:04:01,936 --> 00:04:04,839 I can go places 91 00:04:04,873 --> 00:04:07,208 with the boat that would take me 92 00:04:07,241 --> 00:04:10,111 a much longer time by foot. 93 00:04:10,144 --> 00:04:13,381 I could put the gill net out in deeper water 94 00:04:13,414 --> 00:04:15,916 and perhaps catch salmon. 95 00:04:15,949 --> 00:04:17,918 ♪ 96 00:04:17,951 --> 00:04:19,486 With a little more effort, 97 00:04:19,519 --> 00:04:22,522 I can access better fishing, 98 00:04:22,555 --> 00:04:25,325 and I have no doubt in my mind 99 00:04:25,358 --> 00:04:27,360 that I could stay out here 100 00:04:27,394 --> 00:04:28,494 for a very long time. 101 00:04:28,527 --> 00:04:33,232 ♪ 102 00:04:33,265 --> 00:04:37,603 All right, so tying the outriggers to the tub, 103 00:04:37,636 --> 00:04:40,039 you've got to tie it underneath, so the-- 104 00:04:40,072 --> 00:04:44,675 the black container won't slip all the way through. 105 00:04:44,709 --> 00:04:46,111 It's gonna be a little bit 106 00:04:46,144 --> 00:04:48,113 diagonally unstable, 107 00:04:48,146 --> 00:04:51,950 but the container will help hold that some. 108 00:04:53,318 --> 00:04:55,652 Now it's just a matter of going out on the water. 109 00:04:55,685 --> 00:04:58,288 ♪ 110 00:04:58,322 --> 00:05:01,258 Oh, man. 111 00:05:01,291 --> 00:05:02,960 That could be epic. 112 00:05:02,993 --> 00:05:11,000 ♪ 113 00:05:16,439 --> 00:05:17,840 I want to succeed at this. 114 00:05:17,873 --> 00:05:21,543 I don't want to fail at this, 115 00:05:21,576 --> 00:05:23,979 because if I end up 116 00:05:24,012 --> 00:05:27,015 in the drink and swimming, 117 00:05:27,049 --> 00:05:29,317 if I get hypothermic, 118 00:05:29,351 --> 00:05:30,852 can't start a fire, 119 00:05:30,885 --> 00:05:32,554 can't get warmed up in my bag, 120 00:05:32,587 --> 00:05:36,023 and I have to call in for help, 121 00:05:36,057 --> 00:05:38,292 then this could be the end of my journey. 122 00:05:38,325 --> 00:05:44,932 ♪ 123 00:05:44,966 --> 00:05:46,266 Here we go. 124 00:05:46,299 --> 00:05:54,307 ♪ 125 00:05:58,311 --> 00:05:59,911 Here we go. 126 00:05:59,945 --> 00:06:01,580 Yeah. 127 00:06:01,613 --> 00:06:05,284 ♪ 128 00:06:05,317 --> 00:06:06,685 [grunts] 129 00:06:06,718 --> 00:06:10,522 ♪ 130 00:06:10,555 --> 00:06:12,556 Hey-hey. 131 00:06:12,590 --> 00:06:15,126 Look at this. 132 00:06:15,159 --> 00:06:17,895 Oh, yeah. 133 00:06:17,928 --> 00:06:21,865 She is floating! 134 00:06:21,899 --> 00:06:24,002 Ahoy, matey! 135 00:06:24,035 --> 00:06:28,038 Look at this boat float, would ya? 136 00:06:28,071 --> 00:06:30,707 Whoa-ho-ho! 137 00:06:30,740 --> 00:06:35,412 Man, this thing feels as solid as land. 138 00:06:35,445 --> 00:06:36,746 ♪ 139 00:06:36,779 --> 00:06:40,149 Whoo-hoo! 140 00:06:40,182 --> 00:06:41,750 Holy moly. 141 00:06:41,783 --> 00:06:45,954 ♪ 142 00:06:45,988 --> 00:06:51,759 Yeah, yeah, and it's super solid. 143 00:06:51,792 --> 00:06:54,129 Whoo-hoo! 144 00:06:54,162 --> 00:06:55,863 I could dance. 145 00:06:55,896 --> 00:06:58,399 Oh, I could dance. 146 00:06:58,433 --> 00:07:00,268 Whoo-hoo! 147 00:07:00,301 --> 00:07:02,170 All right. 148 00:07:02,203 --> 00:07:05,172 This is what being a captain 149 00:07:05,205 --> 00:07:07,874 is all about, matey. 150 00:07:07,907 --> 00:07:09,276 Yeah. 151 00:07:09,309 --> 00:07:10,910 ♪ 152 00:07:10,944 --> 00:07:13,647 Wow. 153 00:07:13,680 --> 00:07:15,949 This is just fabulous. 154 00:07:15,982 --> 00:07:16,949 Golden. 155 00:07:16,982 --> 00:07:20,553 Absolutely solid, stellar, 156 00:07:20,586 --> 00:07:22,155 golden. 157 00:07:22,188 --> 00:07:23,422 Thank you, Jesus. 158 00:07:23,456 --> 00:07:25,291 Thank you, Jesus. 159 00:07:25,324 --> 00:07:27,393 [waves crashing] 160 00:07:27,426 --> 00:07:35,433 ♪ 161 00:07:49,280 --> 00:07:51,548 So story of my life out here 162 00:07:51,582 --> 00:07:53,817 on this accursed island. 163 00:07:53,850 --> 00:07:55,086 [chuckles] 164 00:07:55,119 --> 00:07:57,753 I'm waiting for the tide to go down. 165 00:07:57,787 --> 00:07:59,355 It's--it's dark, 166 00:07:59,389 --> 00:08:00,523 but I still got to wait 167 00:08:00,556 --> 00:08:02,592 probably at least another hour 168 00:08:02,625 --> 00:08:04,727 before I can start checking my sets. 169 00:08:04,760 --> 00:08:07,530 ♪ 170 00:08:07,563 --> 00:08:09,798 Seems to be going down later and later 171 00:08:09,831 --> 00:08:11,200 every day. 172 00:08:11,233 --> 00:08:12,867 ♪ 173 00:08:12,901 --> 00:08:14,703 The boredom. 174 00:08:14,736 --> 00:08:16,438 Absolute, sheer boredom. 175 00:08:16,471 --> 00:08:18,773 ♪ 176 00:08:18,807 --> 00:08:21,576 I just kind of stand and dwell on thoughts. 177 00:08:21,610 --> 00:08:23,877 ♪ 178 00:08:23,911 --> 00:08:25,746 Funny how there's little things in life 179 00:08:25,779 --> 00:08:28,182 can be so stressful. 180 00:08:28,216 --> 00:08:30,118 I have a mouse in my house. 181 00:08:30,151 --> 00:08:32,420 That stupid mouse, like, follows me 182 00:08:32,453 --> 00:08:34,222 when I come down here. 183 00:08:34,255 --> 00:08:36,689 I'll turn around, and there's the frickin' mouse, 184 00:08:36,723 --> 00:08:39,992 like, darting in and out of rocks. 185 00:08:40,026 --> 00:08:42,962 Oh, I would be so mad if he got into my sleeping bag. 186 00:08:42,995 --> 00:08:46,533 They are such destructive little... things, 187 00:08:46,566 --> 00:08:49,135 so that's what I'm concerned about. 188 00:08:49,168 --> 00:08:52,171 [water gurgling] 189 00:08:54,806 --> 00:08:56,908 ♪ 190 00:08:56,942 --> 00:08:58,910 Looks like I got one here. 191 00:08:58,944 --> 00:09:01,546 ♪ 192 00:09:06,584 --> 00:09:08,419 And I don't want him... 193 00:09:08,453 --> 00:09:09,754 getting away. 194 00:09:09,787 --> 00:09:13,458 You mother[bleep]. 195 00:09:13,491 --> 00:09:15,125 Sorry about that. 196 00:09:19,329 --> 00:09:22,332 [metal scraping] 197 00:09:27,270 --> 00:09:28,904 What the hell? 198 00:09:32,341 --> 00:09:34,810 [metal scraping] 199 00:09:34,843 --> 00:09:37,813 [kindling sparks] 200 00:09:37,846 --> 00:09:40,615 You're [bleep] me. 201 00:09:40,648 --> 00:09:43,551 This [bleep] [bleep]'s all wet. 202 00:09:43,585 --> 00:09:45,787 [bleep] damn it. 203 00:09:45,820 --> 00:09:48,223 Never had so much [bleep] problems 204 00:09:48,256 --> 00:09:49,757 lighting a [bleep] fire 205 00:09:49,791 --> 00:09:51,025 in a [bleep] damn place 206 00:09:51,058 --> 00:09:53,127 in my entire [bleep] life. 207 00:09:53,161 --> 00:09:58,299 ♪ 208 00:09:58,332 --> 00:10:00,567 Oh, I'm so [bleep] ready for bed. 209 00:10:00,601 --> 00:10:02,503 [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] 210 00:10:02,536 --> 00:10:06,072 you mother[bleep] piece of [bleep]. 211 00:10:06,106 --> 00:10:09,209 [bleep] you, you [bleep]sucker. 212 00:10:09,242 --> 00:10:11,511 You [bleep] piece of [bleep]. 213 00:10:11,544 --> 00:10:19,551 ♪ 214 00:10:25,324 --> 00:10:28,660 Dinner in a little bit. 215 00:10:28,693 --> 00:10:29,861 [thud] 216 00:10:29,894 --> 00:10:32,096 [groans] 217 00:10:35,433 --> 00:10:38,402 [dramatic music] 218 00:10:38,436 --> 00:10:46,443 ♪ 219 00:10:54,984 --> 00:10:56,052 I caught one fish 220 00:10:56,085 --> 00:10:59,755 in the new gill net location. 221 00:10:59,788 --> 00:11:01,357 Very happy to have had 222 00:11:01,390 --> 00:11:04,593 a good, good, solid meal, 223 00:11:04,626 --> 00:11:06,295 but in an ideal world, 224 00:11:06,328 --> 00:11:07,663 it would be, like, in-- 225 00:11:07,696 --> 00:11:11,267 in real deep water, where I have to set it 226 00:11:11,300 --> 00:11:14,302 at retrieve it from a boat. 227 00:11:14,335 --> 00:11:17,872 In that valley, there must be a good-sized stream, 228 00:11:17,905 --> 00:11:19,206 and in that good-sized stream, 229 00:11:19,240 --> 00:11:21,276 there must be a good-sized salmon run. 230 00:11:21,309 --> 00:11:23,544 ♪ 231 00:11:23,578 --> 00:11:26,380 Some food is coming in, 232 00:11:26,413 --> 00:11:28,114 but... 233 00:11:28,147 --> 00:11:29,683 the people that lived here, 234 00:11:29,716 --> 00:11:33,353 they depended on a stable food supply, 235 00:11:33,387 --> 00:11:36,222 and that was the salmon, 236 00:11:36,256 --> 00:11:38,957 and I'm still on time to catch the last migration, 237 00:11:38,991 --> 00:11:41,694 so that's where my mind goes. 238 00:11:41,727 --> 00:11:43,562 That's where my thoughts are right now. 239 00:11:43,596 --> 00:11:47,666 ♪ 240 00:11:47,700 --> 00:11:50,702 [saw whooshing] 241 00:11:53,104 --> 00:11:55,307 If I hit the salmon run full on, 242 00:11:55,340 --> 00:11:57,775 it would make a huge, huge difference 243 00:11:57,809 --> 00:11:58,776 in my situation. 244 00:11:58,810 --> 00:12:01,746 [sawing continues] 245 00:12:01,779 --> 00:12:04,281 So I guess the sooner I get to it, the better. 246 00:12:04,315 --> 00:12:06,650 ♪ 247 00:12:06,683 --> 00:12:08,719 This week, I've gone on long walks. 248 00:12:08,752 --> 00:12:11,455 I've picked up anything that was useful to me, 249 00:12:11,488 --> 00:12:14,891 any bit of cordage, any bit of lumber. 250 00:12:14,925 --> 00:12:18,628 So I think today, I'm gonna start with that. 251 00:12:18,661 --> 00:12:20,430 I think there is enough lumber 252 00:12:20,463 --> 00:12:23,666 to make the gunwales and the main stringer 253 00:12:23,699 --> 00:12:25,435 for a boat. 254 00:12:25,468 --> 00:12:27,937 ♪ 255 00:12:27,970 --> 00:12:30,439 I'm abandoning survival 256 00:12:30,472 --> 00:12:33,074 and trying to go into wilderness living. 257 00:12:33,107 --> 00:12:37,111 Survival per se is how you stay out of trouble 258 00:12:37,145 --> 00:12:40,482 until you go back to civilization, 259 00:12:40,515 --> 00:12:42,050 but what I teach and what I do 260 00:12:42,083 --> 00:12:43,851 is wilderness living, 261 00:12:43,884 --> 00:12:46,354 trying to actually live in the place. 262 00:12:46,387 --> 00:12:48,656 I have to maximize 263 00:12:48,689 --> 00:12:50,891 what the land and the sea has, 264 00:12:50,924 --> 00:12:53,193 and the number one way to maximize it 265 00:12:53,226 --> 00:12:55,363 is having a boat. 266 00:12:55,396 --> 00:12:56,863 That's good. 267 00:12:56,896 --> 00:12:59,832 Now I can start looking into the crosspieces it gets, 268 00:12:59,866 --> 00:13:02,669 and preparing the holes for the ribs. 269 00:13:02,702 --> 00:13:06,339 ♪ 270 00:13:06,373 --> 00:13:07,640 I'm pressed for time. 271 00:13:07,674 --> 00:13:09,174 I wonder if I'm gonna reach the creek, 272 00:13:09,207 --> 00:13:11,710 and a bunch of salmon carcasses is just laying there, 273 00:13:11,743 --> 00:13:13,612 'cause the run just went past me 274 00:13:13,645 --> 00:13:16,281 while I was here building a boat. 275 00:13:16,314 --> 00:13:18,484 And I hope not. 276 00:13:20,519 --> 00:13:23,354 Just--just put up a couple of crosspieces 277 00:13:23,388 --> 00:13:25,456 to support the gunwales. 278 00:13:25,490 --> 00:13:26,457 [wood cracks] 279 00:13:26,491 --> 00:13:28,559 Oh. 280 00:13:28,593 --> 00:13:29,927 [groans] 281 00:13:29,960 --> 00:13:33,598 ♪ 282 00:13:33,631 --> 00:13:35,699 Now you break, you son of a gun. 283 00:13:35,732 --> 00:13:38,468 ♪ 284 00:13:38,502 --> 00:13:41,037 [groans] 285 00:13:41,070 --> 00:13:45,775 This was a big setback in my plans, 286 00:13:45,809 --> 00:13:48,444 and I basically am back to starting out 287 00:13:48,477 --> 00:13:50,245 with that boat, 288 00:13:50,278 --> 00:13:53,849 and I'm still days away from having this completed. 289 00:13:53,882 --> 00:13:56,284 If I miss the salmon run because I'm too late, 290 00:13:56,318 --> 00:14:00,255 oh, that would be very, very bad. 291 00:14:00,288 --> 00:14:03,958 I wish I didn't have that time-pressure thing going. 292 00:14:03,991 --> 00:14:05,860 [sighs] 293 00:14:06,994 --> 00:14:13,867 ♪ 294 00:14:19,740 --> 00:14:22,709 I had an interesting night last night. 295 00:14:22,743 --> 00:14:26,312 A mouse has completely destroyed my gear. 296 00:14:26,346 --> 00:14:28,280 ♪ 297 00:14:28,313 --> 00:14:29,715 Right next to my head, 298 00:14:29,749 --> 00:14:32,084 he was chewing on my pack all night, 299 00:14:32,117 --> 00:14:34,587 and every time I turned on my head lamp, 300 00:14:34,620 --> 00:14:37,457 he'd scurry away. 301 00:14:37,490 --> 00:14:38,924 I swear to God, if that thing 302 00:14:38,958 --> 00:14:40,759 fricking chews my sleeping bag up, 303 00:14:40,792 --> 00:14:41,760 I'm blowing this place up. 304 00:14:41,793 --> 00:14:42,827 I'm gonna find some way 305 00:14:42,861 --> 00:14:46,264 to blow the whole fricking place up. 306 00:14:46,297 --> 00:14:48,633 [birds chirping] 307 00:14:48,667 --> 00:14:52,403 My greatest struggle is emotional. 308 00:14:52,437 --> 00:14:53,871 What's really throwing me for a loop 309 00:14:53,904 --> 00:14:56,440 is how mental this is. 310 00:14:56,474 --> 00:14:59,109 I did not expect this to be this big a mental challenge. 311 00:14:59,142 --> 00:15:01,111 [birds chirping] 312 00:15:01,144 --> 00:15:04,515 The fact that I am secluded 313 00:15:04,548 --> 00:15:07,950 in a 100-foot area, 314 00:15:07,984 --> 00:15:10,553 with walls sloped down 315 00:15:10,587 --> 00:15:12,054 on side of me... 316 00:15:13,656 --> 00:15:16,025 Quite frankly, it gets quite depressing. 317 00:15:16,058 --> 00:15:17,159 [sighs] 318 00:15:17,193 --> 00:15:21,563 And now I have a mouse in my house. 319 00:15:21,597 --> 00:15:24,299 I mean, this place is just really starting to get to me. 320 00:15:24,332 --> 00:15:25,601 [birds chirping] 321 00:15:25,634 --> 00:15:27,869 [sighs] 322 00:15:27,903 --> 00:15:35,710 ♪ 323 00:15:35,743 --> 00:15:38,713 [chirping continues] 324 00:15:38,746 --> 00:15:46,720 ♪ 325 00:15:46,753 --> 00:15:48,522 [fire crackling] 326 00:15:48,555 --> 00:15:52,025 ♪ 327 00:15:52,058 --> 00:15:55,529 I've been trying to formulate a thought, 328 00:15:55,562 --> 00:15:57,196 to express it... 329 00:15:57,230 --> 00:15:58,931 ♪ 330 00:15:58,964 --> 00:16:00,999 Without breaking down and crying. 331 00:16:01,033 --> 00:16:03,168 ♪ 332 00:16:03,201 --> 00:16:04,937 And I'm not sure I'm gonna be able to relay it 333 00:16:04,970 --> 00:16:05,938 without crying. 334 00:16:05,971 --> 00:16:08,340 ♪ 335 00:16:08,373 --> 00:16:11,509 This--so my issue... 336 00:16:12,844 --> 00:16:16,548 One of the reasons why I wanted to come out here 337 00:16:16,581 --> 00:16:20,351 was to try and think 338 00:16:20,384 --> 00:16:21,853 on... 339 00:16:24,120 --> 00:16:28,792 the new aspect of my life. 340 00:16:28,825 --> 00:16:31,194 In other words, after kids. 341 00:16:35,298 --> 00:16:39,401 A person can endure a lot of things 342 00:16:39,434 --> 00:16:41,270 for someone that they love. 343 00:16:43,238 --> 00:16:47,276 Trying to endure... 344 00:16:47,309 --> 00:16:50,979 those same things just purely for yourself 345 00:16:51,012 --> 00:16:52,714 is not as easy. 346 00:16:54,649 --> 00:16:56,618 I'm an electrician. 347 00:16:56,651 --> 00:16:58,052 You might think it's not that hard, 348 00:16:58,086 --> 00:17:00,454 but it's a lot of repetitive tasks. 349 00:17:03,423 --> 00:17:06,093 I know everybody has to go to work. 350 00:17:06,126 --> 00:17:09,396 I know it's just the way of the world, 351 00:17:09,429 --> 00:17:12,966 but for me to think... 352 00:17:14,167 --> 00:17:16,703 that I have another 15 years... 353 00:17:18,871 --> 00:17:23,509 of basically wasting my life, 354 00:17:23,542 --> 00:17:25,778 waiting for the weekends. 355 00:17:31,316 --> 00:17:35,654 Just the mundane torture of it all. 356 00:17:38,389 --> 00:17:42,893 ♪ 357 00:17:42,927 --> 00:17:44,161 I'm gonna have to make a change. 358 00:17:44,194 --> 00:17:45,730 It's not the world that needs to change. 359 00:17:45,763 --> 00:17:48,132 It's me that needs to change. 360 00:17:48,165 --> 00:17:50,267 My--my outlook on life. 361 00:17:50,300 --> 00:17:57,807 ♪ 362 00:17:57,841 --> 00:18:00,777 This place, I know the rules. 363 00:18:00,810 --> 00:18:02,411 It's life outside of this place 364 00:18:02,445 --> 00:18:04,047 that makes me want to cry. 365 00:18:04,080 --> 00:18:06,082 ♪ 366 00:18:11,386 --> 00:18:19,394 ♪ 367 00:18:27,001 --> 00:18:29,503 All right, I'll stand in front of the camera. 368 00:18:29,536 --> 00:18:32,840 Move it down. 369 00:18:32,874 --> 00:18:33,908 I'm still here 370 00:18:33,941 --> 00:18:35,809 and doing well, 371 00:18:35,842 --> 00:18:37,243 so keeping myself warm, 372 00:18:37,277 --> 00:18:40,346 making sure I have enough food. 373 00:18:40,380 --> 00:18:43,984 I think I've figured out black bear behavior. 374 00:18:44,017 --> 00:18:46,419 It's been a learning experience. 375 00:18:46,452 --> 00:18:49,889 It's a sort of game, like, the bears and I 376 00:18:49,922 --> 00:18:52,825 forage on the beach together at the same time. 377 00:18:52,858 --> 00:18:54,226 They stay on their side of the river 378 00:18:54,259 --> 00:18:55,728 and don't come over here. 379 00:18:55,761 --> 00:18:58,330 Plenty, plenty of fish. 380 00:18:58,363 --> 00:19:02,400 I love that I'm part of the ecosystem here. 381 00:19:02,433 --> 00:19:05,069 I feel at home here. 382 00:19:05,103 --> 00:19:07,538 It's another good day. 383 00:19:07,571 --> 00:19:09,240 I'm gonna go check my gill net. 384 00:19:09,273 --> 00:19:12,176 That Chinook run should be coming in really soon, 385 00:19:12,210 --> 00:19:15,178 and that's a great source of food. 386 00:19:15,212 --> 00:19:16,714 ♪ Watching for bears 387 00:19:16,747 --> 00:19:18,448 'cause they like it right here. 388 00:19:18,481 --> 00:19:21,218 Oh, I think we're gonna coexist just fine. 389 00:19:21,251 --> 00:19:24,221 ♪ Looks like we got something ♪ 390 00:19:24,254 --> 00:19:27,656 We got some salmon. 391 00:19:27,690 --> 00:19:30,827 Oh! And it is alive and kicking. 392 00:19:30,860 --> 00:19:32,962 You need to cut its backbone, is the main thing. 393 00:19:32,995 --> 00:19:35,798 ♪ 394 00:19:35,832 --> 00:19:38,234 Hold it really firmly, 395 00:19:38,267 --> 00:19:40,601 and cut through its spinal cord in there. 396 00:19:40,635 --> 00:19:42,804 ♪ 397 00:19:42,838 --> 00:19:45,606 Kind of cool: the heart is still-- 398 00:19:45,640 --> 00:19:46,641 it's still beating. 399 00:19:46,674 --> 00:19:48,777 Oh, it just was. 400 00:19:48,810 --> 00:19:50,278 There we go. 401 00:19:50,311 --> 00:19:51,279 See that? 402 00:19:51,312 --> 00:19:54,782 ♪ 403 00:19:54,815 --> 00:19:59,019 [French accent] Now for ze body. 404 00:19:59,053 --> 00:20:00,921 Oh, boy. 405 00:20:00,955 --> 00:20:02,857 Feeling very lucky today. 406 00:20:02,890 --> 00:20:06,259 This amazing, fresh salmon. 407 00:20:06,292 --> 00:20:09,729 Here's the body. 408 00:20:09,763 --> 00:20:11,831 [grunts] Put it here to fillet. 409 00:20:11,865 --> 00:20:13,066 How you doing over there, bears? 410 00:20:13,099 --> 00:20:14,868 How's your river? 411 00:20:14,901 --> 00:20:17,971 They got their own river where the salmon are spawning. 412 00:20:18,004 --> 00:20:19,504 We're all eating well, 413 00:20:19,537 --> 00:20:21,373 so that works out. 414 00:20:21,406 --> 00:20:24,042 [laughs] 415 00:20:24,076 --> 00:20:26,311 All right, well. 416 00:20:26,344 --> 00:20:30,682 Time to get these puppies filleted 417 00:20:30,715 --> 00:20:32,316 and cleaned. 418 00:20:32,349 --> 00:20:34,852 It's really important to me that if I take a life, 419 00:20:34,886 --> 00:20:37,121 that I use every single bit of that animal. 420 00:20:37,154 --> 00:20:38,522 It's respectful, 421 00:20:38,555 --> 00:20:41,025 and I want to be respectful of this sacred land 422 00:20:41,058 --> 00:20:43,360 that we're being allowed to use. 423 00:20:43,394 --> 00:20:45,095 Those reflexes always get me 424 00:20:45,128 --> 00:20:47,463 when they move when you're cutting it. 425 00:20:47,497 --> 00:20:48,498 Voila. 426 00:20:48,531 --> 00:20:51,167 Better than your best restaurant. 427 00:20:51,201 --> 00:20:54,704 That's dinner, lunch, breakfast. 428 00:20:54,737 --> 00:20:55,839 Dinner, lunch, breakfast. 429 00:20:55,872 --> 00:20:58,073 Oh, yeah, a whole lot of food. 430 00:21:01,443 --> 00:21:06,148 ♪ 431 00:21:11,185 --> 00:21:14,155 [water gushing] 432 00:21:14,188 --> 00:21:21,629 ♪ 433 00:21:21,662 --> 00:21:23,897 So last night, 434 00:21:23,931 --> 00:21:27,034 a mouse completely destroyed my gear. 435 00:21:27,067 --> 00:21:30,838 He was chewing on my pack all night. 436 00:21:30,871 --> 00:21:32,973 I really want to give it a concerted effort 437 00:21:33,006 --> 00:21:35,876 to try and find a new location. 438 00:21:35,909 --> 00:21:37,309 ♪ 439 00:21:37,343 --> 00:21:39,211 It's up to me. It's not up to anybody else. 440 00:21:39,245 --> 00:21:41,147 It's up to me to make a change. 441 00:21:47,686 --> 00:21:49,821 That's the plan for today. 442 00:21:49,855 --> 00:21:52,723 I'm getting the hell out of here. 443 00:21:52,757 --> 00:21:55,193 Let this damn mouse have this frickin' place. 444 00:21:55,226 --> 00:21:57,428 ♪ 445 00:21:57,462 --> 00:21:58,897 So I've lost some weight. 446 00:21:58,930 --> 00:22:02,000 I need another couple of notches on my belt. 447 00:22:02,033 --> 00:22:05,469 Let's get this hip belt situated. 448 00:22:05,502 --> 00:22:06,470 Tightened down. 449 00:22:06,503 --> 00:22:11,641 ♪ 450 00:22:11,675 --> 00:22:13,610 All right. 451 00:22:13,643 --> 00:22:15,912 Time to head out. 452 00:22:15,945 --> 00:22:19,015 I'm pretty nervous about leaving a known entity, 453 00:22:19,048 --> 00:22:22,318 but it's either try and survive where I'm at, 454 00:22:22,351 --> 00:22:25,321 and potentially tap quite early, 455 00:22:25,354 --> 00:22:27,690 or it's go for broke 456 00:22:27,723 --> 00:22:29,724 and really try to get out here 457 00:22:29,757 --> 00:22:31,659 and try to find a good location 458 00:22:31,693 --> 00:22:32,694 and live out here. 459 00:22:32,727 --> 00:22:37,499 ♪ 460 00:22:37,532 --> 00:22:39,868 I've done three or four little walks, 461 00:22:39,902 --> 00:22:42,836 and the only other place I haven't gone 462 00:22:42,870 --> 00:22:45,239 is more south, 463 00:22:45,272 --> 00:22:47,008 so it's opened up a little bit. 464 00:22:47,041 --> 00:22:49,410 I'm following this creek bed. 465 00:22:49,443 --> 00:22:50,577 [exhales] 466 00:22:50,611 --> 00:22:52,779 But it's thick back here. 467 00:22:52,813 --> 00:22:55,581 I see a little bit of daylight up there 468 00:22:55,615 --> 00:22:57,918 through the trees. 469 00:22:57,951 --> 00:23:00,954 I'm hoping that that pans out to a-- 470 00:23:00,987 --> 00:23:02,122 I don't know. 471 00:23:02,155 --> 00:23:04,457 It's got to empty into the ocean sometime. 472 00:23:04,490 --> 00:23:09,261 ♪ 473 00:23:09,294 --> 00:23:11,263 Oh, this is killing my knees. 474 00:23:11,296 --> 00:23:12,864 [groans] 475 00:23:12,898 --> 00:23:14,033 I've got old man knees. 476 00:23:14,066 --> 00:23:15,834 [groans] 477 00:23:15,867 --> 00:23:17,836 Oh, my pack's caught. 478 00:23:17,869 --> 00:23:18,837 Damn you. 479 00:23:18,870 --> 00:23:26,610 ♪ 480 00:23:26,644 --> 00:23:28,879 Oh, my gosh. 481 00:23:28,913 --> 00:23:30,381 Oh, you son of a... 482 00:23:30,414 --> 00:23:31,382 ♪ 483 00:23:31,415 --> 00:23:32,850 God. 484 00:23:32,883 --> 00:23:36,019 ♪ 485 00:23:36,053 --> 00:23:37,287 [groans] 486 00:23:37,320 --> 00:23:38,288 ♪ 487 00:23:38,321 --> 00:23:39,522 Damn it. 488 00:23:39,556 --> 00:23:42,025 ♪ 489 00:23:42,059 --> 00:23:43,560 All right, well, I'm getting excited. 490 00:23:43,593 --> 00:23:44,661 I can hear the ocean. 491 00:23:44,694 --> 00:23:48,130 ♪ 492 00:23:48,164 --> 00:23:50,366 [laughing] 493 00:23:50,399 --> 00:23:52,001 Oh, my God. 494 00:23:52,034 --> 00:23:54,903 ♪ 495 00:23:54,937 --> 00:23:58,607 To get out of that confining space of-- 496 00:23:58,640 --> 00:24:01,176 to be able to see this, man, 497 00:24:01,209 --> 00:24:02,843 and to expend the calories and stuff 498 00:24:02,877 --> 00:24:04,712 and not know where I was gonna end up 499 00:24:04,745 --> 00:24:06,181 or what was gonna happen. 500 00:24:06,214 --> 00:24:07,815 Let's get down here and see 501 00:24:07,848 --> 00:24:09,250 what the heck's going on. 502 00:24:09,284 --> 00:24:11,286 ♪ 503 00:24:11,319 --> 00:24:12,353 I can just tell already 504 00:24:12,387 --> 00:24:15,655 that this is gonna be loads better, 505 00:24:15,689 --> 00:24:17,857 loads better. 506 00:24:17,891 --> 00:24:20,160 Look--there's dead wood right there. 507 00:24:20,194 --> 00:24:22,496 Look at all the kindling and stuff like that right here. 508 00:24:22,529 --> 00:24:23,863 ♪ 509 00:24:23,897 --> 00:24:26,332 And this place is fricking chanterelle heaven. 510 00:24:26,365 --> 00:24:28,801 ♪ 511 00:24:28,834 --> 00:24:30,303 Oh, my God. 512 00:24:30,336 --> 00:24:31,737 ♪ 513 00:24:31,770 --> 00:24:34,740 Just the emotional uplifting 514 00:24:34,773 --> 00:24:36,775 this is gonna give me 515 00:24:36,809 --> 00:24:38,111 is huge. 516 00:24:38,144 --> 00:24:40,345 ♪ 517 00:24:40,378 --> 00:24:41,713 Look at this. 518 00:24:41,746 --> 00:24:44,782 There's sunlight on the rocks. 519 00:24:44,816 --> 00:24:45,984 I could be sunbathing. 520 00:24:46,018 --> 00:24:48,186 ♪ 521 00:24:48,220 --> 00:24:50,522 It's frickin' awesome. 522 00:24:50,555 --> 00:24:54,925 ♪ 523 00:24:58,262 --> 00:25:01,298 [dramatic music] 524 00:25:01,332 --> 00:25:09,339 ♪ 525 00:25:22,117 --> 00:25:24,453 This was the best move. 526 00:25:24,486 --> 00:25:25,587 Not just move, literally. 527 00:25:25,620 --> 00:25:27,456 This was the best move I've done 528 00:25:27,489 --> 00:25:30,759 this entire journey. 529 00:25:30,792 --> 00:25:33,661 All right, well, I haven't even been here ten minutes, 530 00:25:33,694 --> 00:25:35,796 and what did I find? 531 00:25:35,829 --> 00:25:36,797 Rope. 532 00:25:36,830 --> 00:25:38,266 Cordage. 533 00:25:38,299 --> 00:25:40,501 I'm gonna split this rope down, 534 00:25:40,534 --> 00:25:42,002 and right back behind me 535 00:25:42,036 --> 00:25:43,571 is where I'm gonna make my shelter. 536 00:25:43,604 --> 00:25:46,039 ♪ 537 00:25:46,073 --> 00:25:48,408 God, that was a craphole I left. 538 00:25:48,441 --> 00:25:50,343 This place is so much better. 539 00:25:50,377 --> 00:25:52,912 There's a lot of man-made resources. 540 00:25:52,945 --> 00:25:55,448 I got a whole nother thing of this cordage, 541 00:25:55,482 --> 00:25:57,216 and that was just what I found on the beach 542 00:25:57,249 --> 00:26:00,686 in the first five minutes I was here. 543 00:26:00,719 --> 00:26:04,256 I've got to get shelter set up. 544 00:26:04,290 --> 00:26:07,226 I've got stuff in my backpack 545 00:26:07,259 --> 00:26:08,660 that can't get wet. 546 00:26:08,694 --> 00:26:12,397 I cannot afford to get my sleeping bag wet. 547 00:26:12,430 --> 00:26:14,732 I just need to hurry up and set up a shelter, 548 00:26:14,765 --> 00:26:16,234 and then I'll go back for my other crap 549 00:26:16,267 --> 00:26:18,369 that I left. 550 00:26:18,403 --> 00:26:21,806 I'm just gonna make a simple A-frame. 551 00:26:21,839 --> 00:26:23,273 I'm really partial to the plow point, 552 00:26:23,307 --> 00:26:24,674 but the problem with the plow point 553 00:26:24,708 --> 00:26:26,042 in this country is it rains so much 554 00:26:26,076 --> 00:26:30,314 that the rain leaks down the pole, 555 00:26:30,347 --> 00:26:33,283 and it's such strong winds 556 00:26:33,317 --> 00:26:35,352 that I don't want to put that much pressure on the tarp 557 00:26:35,385 --> 00:26:39,222 and not have a ridgepole. 558 00:26:39,255 --> 00:26:42,991 I'm so happy to be rid of that frickin' mouse. 559 00:26:43,025 --> 00:26:46,362 Little destructive piece of crap. 560 00:26:46,395 --> 00:26:47,763 I'm gonna make it my life's mission 561 00:26:47,796 --> 00:26:50,398 to kill every frickin' mouse I possibly can. 562 00:26:50,432 --> 00:26:54,369 That's my new mission going forward, yes. 563 00:26:54,402 --> 00:26:57,239 We could have lived in harmony. I wasn't hungry. 564 00:26:57,272 --> 00:26:59,073 I was gonna leave him alone, 565 00:26:59,107 --> 00:27:02,609 but oh, no. 566 00:27:02,643 --> 00:27:06,147 Him and his kind are gonna feel my wrath from now on. 567 00:27:06,180 --> 00:27:13,454 ♪ 568 00:27:13,487 --> 00:27:16,456 [saw cutting] 569 00:27:16,489 --> 00:27:22,495 ♪ 570 00:27:22,528 --> 00:27:24,530 I really want this to be a good, strong shelter, 571 00:27:24,564 --> 00:27:26,299 so... 572 00:27:33,472 --> 00:27:34,639 Limbs. 573 00:27:34,673 --> 00:27:35,674 I need two of 'em, 574 00:27:35,707 --> 00:27:37,342 and they need to be long. 575 00:27:37,376 --> 00:27:38,677 ♪ 576 00:27:38,710 --> 00:27:40,845 I've never made one like this before. 577 00:27:40,879 --> 00:27:45,683 ♪ 578 00:27:45,716 --> 00:27:48,886 It's always just a [bleep] inch too short. 579 00:27:48,919 --> 00:27:50,888 [bleep] damn it. 580 00:27:50,921 --> 00:27:58,928 ♪ 581 00:28:14,676 --> 00:28:15,811 [bleep] 582 00:28:15,844 --> 00:28:20,415 Once again, [bleep] four inches too short. 583 00:28:20,448 --> 00:28:24,752 Oh, you [bleep]-loving mother[bleep]. 584 00:28:24,785 --> 00:28:27,255 Piece of [bleep]. 585 00:28:29,290 --> 00:28:32,693 [bleep] [bleep] damn it. 586 00:28:40,667 --> 00:28:44,137 Cut another [bleep] ten-[bleep] tree down. 587 00:28:49,575 --> 00:28:53,145 I can definitely feel a lot of mood swings. 588 00:28:55,448 --> 00:28:57,883 Um, I get frustrated pretty easy. 589 00:28:57,916 --> 00:28:59,917 I get angry pretty easy. 590 00:28:59,951 --> 00:29:07,625 ♪ 591 00:29:07,659 --> 00:29:10,328 But I usually come back 592 00:29:10,362 --> 00:29:11,996 and try and solve the problem 593 00:29:12,029 --> 00:29:13,497 semi-rationally. 594 00:29:13,530 --> 00:29:15,766 ♪ 595 00:29:26,876 --> 00:29:30,346 ♪ 596 00:29:30,380 --> 00:29:32,382 Feel like everything's okay now. 597 00:29:32,415 --> 00:29:34,650 ♪ 598 00:29:34,684 --> 00:29:36,352 I mean, maybe I'll be plagued by predators. 599 00:29:36,386 --> 00:29:37,753 I don't know, but... 600 00:29:37,787 --> 00:29:39,454 ♪ 601 00:29:39,488 --> 00:29:41,256 I still think it's better. 602 00:29:41,290 --> 00:29:43,425 It's way, way better 603 00:29:43,458 --> 00:29:45,026 than where I came from. 604 00:29:49,631 --> 00:29:54,167 ♪ 605 00:29:59,340 --> 00:30:02,310 [rain falling] 606 00:30:02,343 --> 00:30:03,577 ♪ 607 00:30:03,611 --> 00:30:06,579 [fire crackling] 608 00:30:06,613 --> 00:30:09,616 [rain pattering on tarp] 609 00:30:13,853 --> 00:30:15,555 Ugly faces. 610 00:30:15,588 --> 00:30:17,256 Me and my sister used to make ugly faces 611 00:30:17,290 --> 00:30:20,392 in the mirror. 612 00:30:20,426 --> 00:30:22,594 [chuckles] 613 00:30:22,628 --> 00:30:30,635 ♪ 614 00:30:36,173 --> 00:30:38,809 All right, so I'm out 615 00:30:38,843 --> 00:30:40,745 checking all my fishing lines. 616 00:30:40,778 --> 00:30:44,748 ♪ 617 00:30:44,781 --> 00:30:47,717 Finding some food is a priority. 618 00:30:47,751 --> 00:30:49,519 The number one priority. 619 00:30:49,553 --> 00:30:57,560 ♪ 620 00:31:01,697 --> 00:31:04,967 That is a really interesting fish. 621 00:31:05,000 --> 00:31:08,337 I have no idea... 622 00:31:08,371 --> 00:31:10,004 what it could possibly be. 623 00:31:10,037 --> 00:31:14,241 It is so beautiful, though. 624 00:31:14,275 --> 00:31:15,677 [laughing] 625 00:31:15,710 --> 00:31:17,779 Two lines, two fish. 626 00:31:17,812 --> 00:31:20,848 [laughing] Oh, yeah. 627 00:31:20,882 --> 00:31:22,683 Oh. 628 00:31:22,716 --> 00:31:23,950 It's amazing. 629 00:31:23,984 --> 00:31:25,952 This is working. 630 00:31:25,986 --> 00:31:28,288 [laughing] 631 00:31:28,321 --> 00:31:30,857 [exclaims] 632 00:31:30,891 --> 00:31:32,559 That I've been catching fish 633 00:31:32,593 --> 00:31:34,528 every day for the last three days, 634 00:31:34,561 --> 00:31:37,262 after going two weeks without catching anything. 635 00:31:37,296 --> 00:31:39,665 That's--that's so huge. 636 00:31:39,699 --> 00:31:41,534 ♪ 637 00:31:41,567 --> 00:31:45,104 Good old-fashioned regular fishing. 638 00:31:45,137 --> 00:31:46,806 A bobber, 639 00:31:46,839 --> 00:31:48,140 a little sinker, 640 00:31:48,173 --> 00:31:49,140 a hook, 641 00:31:49,173 --> 00:31:50,642 and some bait. 642 00:31:50,675 --> 00:31:52,210 ♪ 643 00:31:52,243 --> 00:31:55,179 Another day where I'll have a bit of meat. 644 00:31:55,213 --> 00:31:57,616 I am so grateful for you. 645 00:31:57,649 --> 00:32:00,084 I'm really happy with what I have accomplished so far. 646 00:32:00,118 --> 00:32:02,620 ♪ 647 00:32:02,653 --> 00:32:05,489 But I just, like, am craving 648 00:32:05,523 --> 00:32:06,990 human companionship 649 00:32:07,024 --> 00:32:08,926 even more than food. 650 00:32:08,959 --> 00:32:14,031 ♪ 651 00:32:14,064 --> 00:32:17,133 I wish I could talk to my dad, actually. 652 00:32:17,166 --> 00:32:19,101 ♪ 653 00:32:19,135 --> 00:32:21,070 He'd do good out here. 654 00:32:21,103 --> 00:32:22,705 He'd do real good. 655 00:32:24,841 --> 00:32:29,711 ♪ 656 00:32:29,745 --> 00:32:31,112 It's really hard being alone. 657 00:32:31,146 --> 00:32:33,148 I've never been alone for this long before. 658 00:32:33,181 --> 00:32:36,652 ♪ 659 00:32:36,685 --> 00:32:40,589 You just, like, crave companionship, 660 00:32:40,622 --> 00:32:42,490 someone to talk to. 661 00:32:42,523 --> 00:32:44,358 ♪ 662 00:32:44,391 --> 00:32:46,761 It definitely takes its toll on you. 663 00:32:46,794 --> 00:32:54,801 ♪ 664 00:33:00,339 --> 00:33:03,376 [dramatic music] 665 00:33:03,409 --> 00:33:11,416 ♪ 666 00:33:18,591 --> 00:33:20,525 This morning, I walked down to the water 667 00:33:20,558 --> 00:33:23,628 and had this amazing experience, just... 668 00:33:23,661 --> 00:33:25,930 this bald eagle came from the other side of the bay, 669 00:33:25,963 --> 00:33:27,565 and it circled the bay 670 00:33:27,599 --> 00:33:30,468 and then flew right in front of me. 671 00:33:30,502 --> 00:33:31,969 It was amazing. 672 00:33:36,372 --> 00:33:38,208 I do wonder how my kids are doing. 673 00:33:38,241 --> 00:33:40,611 You know, I try to compartmentalize. 674 00:33:40,644 --> 00:33:44,014 Try to just think about being here, 675 00:33:44,047 --> 00:33:47,550 'cause this is where I am, but... 676 00:33:47,583 --> 00:33:48,884 I think if you have any issues 677 00:33:48,918 --> 00:33:50,520 kind of going on in your head, 678 00:33:50,553 --> 00:33:52,722 being alone for long periods of time-- 679 00:33:52,755 --> 00:33:54,857 I think that's when things crop up for people. 680 00:33:54,890 --> 00:33:59,594 ♪ 681 00:33:59,628 --> 00:34:01,663 [crying] I really miss my-- 682 00:34:01,696 --> 00:34:03,598 my stepson. 683 00:34:06,568 --> 00:34:08,236 Beau died two years ago. 684 00:34:08,269 --> 00:34:11,472 He drowned in San Francisco. 685 00:34:11,506 --> 00:34:13,340 [crying] 686 00:34:13,373 --> 00:34:15,643 He went swimming, and... 687 00:34:15,676 --> 00:34:17,377 he was missing for a long time, 688 00:34:17,410 --> 00:34:19,212 and I spent a month looking for him 689 00:34:19,246 --> 00:34:21,749 until we figured out what happened to him. 690 00:34:24,484 --> 00:34:26,385 He died on the day that I-- 691 00:34:26,418 --> 00:34:29,689 I was in Arizona. 692 00:34:29,722 --> 00:34:30,790 When I got the call, 693 00:34:30,823 --> 00:34:34,961 I was graduating with my doctorate, and... 694 00:34:34,994 --> 00:34:36,629 we texted back and forth a lot. 695 00:34:36,663 --> 00:34:40,398 That was an easy medium when he moved, 696 00:34:40,431 --> 00:34:43,635 and I texted him a picture of me 697 00:34:43,669 --> 00:34:46,872 in my, like, cap and gown, 698 00:34:46,905 --> 00:34:49,007 saying, "I did it. I'm finally a doctor now. 699 00:34:49,040 --> 00:34:50,475 I finally did it." 700 00:34:50,508 --> 00:34:51,876 And I think I was probably, 701 00:34:51,909 --> 00:34:54,411 like, 30 minutes too late. 702 00:34:54,444 --> 00:34:55,880 I remember thinking, "That's weird. 703 00:34:55,913 --> 00:34:57,147 He didn't write right back," 704 00:34:57,181 --> 00:34:59,650 'cause he always writes right back. 705 00:34:59,684 --> 00:35:00,985 And I just sometimes think, like, 706 00:35:01,018 --> 00:35:04,688 what if I'd texted an hour earlier, you know? 707 00:35:04,721 --> 00:35:05,855 I don't know 708 00:35:05,889 --> 00:35:07,791 if anything I could have done 709 00:35:07,824 --> 00:35:09,593 made any difference. 710 00:35:09,626 --> 00:35:13,296 ♪ 711 00:35:13,329 --> 00:35:15,632 [sniffles] Ohh. 712 00:35:15,665 --> 00:35:21,870 ♪ 713 00:35:21,904 --> 00:35:23,639 I know his brothers feel it every day. 714 00:35:23,672 --> 00:35:24,740 I feel it every day. 715 00:35:24,773 --> 00:35:26,642 I'm sure his dad does too. 716 00:35:26,675 --> 00:35:28,510 I'm sure his grandparents do. 717 00:35:28,543 --> 00:35:30,177 ♪ 718 00:35:30,211 --> 00:35:33,380 My God, I miss him every day, so much. 719 00:35:33,414 --> 00:35:34,782 It's so hard. 720 00:35:34,816 --> 00:35:38,252 [breathes deeply] 721 00:35:38,285 --> 00:35:39,954 But I look for the beauty in things, 722 00:35:39,987 --> 00:35:41,422 and I look for joy in life, 723 00:35:41,455 --> 00:35:43,489 and I have other kids 724 00:35:43,523 --> 00:35:45,692 that I need to take care of, you know? 725 00:35:45,726 --> 00:35:47,193 [somber chuckle] 726 00:35:47,227 --> 00:35:54,200 ♪ 727 00:35:54,234 --> 00:35:56,568 But it'll never mean I don't miss Beau 728 00:35:56,602 --> 00:35:57,903 every day. 729 00:35:57,937 --> 00:35:59,639 ♪ 730 00:35:59,672 --> 00:36:02,374 [exhales] 731 00:36:02,407 --> 00:36:03,876 Wow. 732 00:36:03,909 --> 00:36:06,178 ♪ 733 00:36:06,211 --> 00:36:08,180 I have to just think of him 734 00:36:08,213 --> 00:36:11,349 as being there with me and cheering me on. 735 00:36:11,382 --> 00:36:13,217 It's all I can do. I mean... 736 00:36:13,251 --> 00:36:14,753 He'd be proud of me here. 737 00:36:14,786 --> 00:36:16,988 I know he would. 738 00:36:17,021 --> 00:36:19,190 He'd be stoked. He'd think this was cool. 739 00:36:19,223 --> 00:36:20,358 [chuckles] 740 00:36:20,391 --> 00:36:28,398 ♪ 741 00:36:47,717 --> 00:36:51,820 I've been in a pretty funky headspace all day, 742 00:36:51,853 --> 00:36:54,790 just getting the blood flowing a little bit, 743 00:36:54,823 --> 00:36:57,693 keeping myself occupied. 744 00:36:57,726 --> 00:36:59,728 [sawing] 745 00:36:59,761 --> 00:37:02,296 I'm happy with the cabin so far. 746 00:37:02,329 --> 00:37:05,332 It's not done yet, but it's getting there. 747 00:37:05,365 --> 00:37:08,836 I'm gonna start reinforcing the walls. 748 00:37:08,869 --> 00:37:11,405 Put in a post at the very end. 749 00:37:11,438 --> 00:37:12,773 This one I did a couple of more, 750 00:37:12,807 --> 00:37:14,908 'cause I noticed that this wall 751 00:37:14,941 --> 00:37:16,575 was leaning a little bit. 752 00:37:16,609 --> 00:37:20,914 That should definitely secure it, 753 00:37:20,947 --> 00:37:25,885 at least for the duration that I will be here. 754 00:37:25,919 --> 00:37:27,053 ♪ 755 00:37:27,086 --> 00:37:28,053 Now, what I do here 756 00:37:28,086 --> 00:37:32,825 is just tie the posts together. 757 00:37:32,858 --> 00:37:34,392 ♪ 758 00:37:34,426 --> 00:37:36,862 It's like there's a party going on in here all the time. 759 00:37:36,895 --> 00:37:39,397 ♪ 760 00:37:39,431 --> 00:37:42,633 But I'm the-- I'm the only one here. 761 00:37:42,666 --> 00:37:44,568 I'm the only one-- I was the only one invited, 762 00:37:44,601 --> 00:37:47,004 is what it was. 763 00:37:47,038 --> 00:37:49,540 Make myself a little-- a little mattress. 764 00:37:49,573 --> 00:37:52,143 ♪ 765 00:37:52,176 --> 00:37:54,911 I'm set up to be here 766 00:37:54,945 --> 00:37:55,912 for a long time. 767 00:37:55,946 --> 00:37:58,414 ♪ 768 00:37:58,448 --> 00:38:02,685 I have walls around me. 769 00:38:02,719 --> 00:38:04,788 I have, you know, an entire ocean 770 00:38:04,821 --> 00:38:06,356 full of fish 771 00:38:06,389 --> 00:38:09,224 that I have been catching. 772 00:38:09,258 --> 00:38:11,393 I mean, you could have the best life in the world, 773 00:38:11,426 --> 00:38:15,097 but if you're alone, then what's the point, really? 774 00:38:15,130 --> 00:38:18,300 What's the point of living if you're just doing it alone? 775 00:38:18,333 --> 00:38:20,201 All right, well, let's see how she does. 776 00:38:20,234 --> 00:38:26,374 ♪ 777 00:38:26,407 --> 00:38:27,942 [sighs] 778 00:38:27,976 --> 00:38:32,746 ♪ 779 00:38:32,780 --> 00:38:34,414 Luxury. 780 00:38:34,447 --> 00:38:36,884 ♪ 781 00:38:36,917 --> 00:38:40,287 What am I doing out here? 782 00:38:40,320 --> 00:38:42,122 Besides building [bleep]. 783 00:38:42,155 --> 00:38:45,458 ♪ 784 00:38:45,492 --> 00:38:47,593 You know, you build, and you build, and you build, 785 00:38:47,626 --> 00:38:49,361 and when you run out of things, 786 00:38:49,395 --> 00:38:52,564 then you're just sort of left here 787 00:38:52,598 --> 00:38:55,334 without anything to do. 788 00:38:55,367 --> 00:38:58,603 ♪ 789 00:38:58,636 --> 00:39:01,672 I think if the world ended, 790 00:39:01,706 --> 00:39:03,341 or if society as we know it 791 00:39:03,374 --> 00:39:05,243 just, like, crashed... 792 00:39:05,276 --> 00:39:06,878 ♪ 793 00:39:06,912 --> 00:39:08,479 and I were, like, 794 00:39:08,513 --> 00:39:11,849 the last survivor... 795 00:39:11,882 --> 00:39:15,786 I wouldn't do it. 796 00:39:15,820 --> 00:39:17,454 There'd be no point. 797 00:39:17,487 --> 00:39:22,659 ♪ 798 00:39:22,692 --> 00:39:24,261 I knew it was gonna be hard, 799 00:39:24,294 --> 00:39:27,396 being alone. 800 00:39:27,430 --> 00:39:28,832 I guess I just didn't know 801 00:39:28,865 --> 00:39:30,766 it was gonna be this hard. 802 00:39:30,800 --> 00:39:32,902 ♪ 803 00:39:32,936 --> 00:39:35,071 There's times when I, like-- 804 00:39:35,104 --> 00:39:39,041 every fiber of my being is just saying, like, 805 00:39:39,074 --> 00:39:40,575 that I want to go home. 806 00:39:40,608 --> 00:39:44,980 ♪ 807 00:39:47,983 --> 00:39:50,285 [dramatic music] 808 00:39:50,318 --> 00:39:58,325 ♪ 809 00:40:20,745 --> 00:40:23,148 Hello, ocean. 810 00:40:23,182 --> 00:40:28,487 It is good to see you again. 811 00:40:28,520 --> 00:40:31,755 I got a big decision to make. 812 00:40:31,789 --> 00:40:35,059 It is nice that you haven't left, 813 00:40:35,093 --> 00:40:38,129 =or else I'd be in big trouble. 814 00:40:38,162 --> 00:40:40,064 The biggest question I have is just 815 00:40:40,098 --> 00:40:42,799 "What am I doing this for?" 816 00:40:42,832 --> 00:40:46,469 ♪ 817 00:40:46,503 --> 00:40:49,372 It's impossible to describe what this is like 818 00:40:49,406 --> 00:40:51,641 until someone comes out here and does it. 819 00:40:51,674 --> 00:40:53,276 ♪ 820 00:40:53,310 --> 00:40:55,545 It's just so incredibly beautiful here. 821 00:40:55,578 --> 00:40:59,248 It's just--it's mind-blowing. 822 00:40:59,281 --> 00:41:02,184 It's like, it's not something that you just get used to. 823 00:41:02,218 --> 00:41:05,922 ♪ 824 00:41:05,955 --> 00:41:07,189 But I don't know if there's more 825 00:41:07,223 --> 00:41:10,825 that I can get from this place, you know? 826 00:41:10,858 --> 00:41:13,761 I don't know if there's more that this place has 827 00:41:13,794 --> 00:41:15,363 to offer me. 828 00:41:15,396 --> 00:41:18,399 ♪ 829 00:41:18,433 --> 00:41:19,500 I mean, don't get me wrong. 830 00:41:19,534 --> 00:41:21,702 Like, I love living this way. 831 00:41:21,736 --> 00:41:24,271 I--I actually want to live this way. 832 00:41:24,304 --> 00:41:25,973 ♪ 833 00:41:26,006 --> 00:41:28,442 But there's no way I could do it alone. 834 00:41:28,475 --> 00:41:30,710 ♪ 835 00:41:30,744 --> 00:41:32,146 There's been a lot of times 836 00:41:32,179 --> 00:41:34,814 I've felt like I wanted to go home. 837 00:41:37,883 --> 00:41:41,287 But--but I wasn't ready. 838 00:41:41,320 --> 00:41:46,559 ♪ 839 00:41:46,592 --> 00:41:48,526 I just want to leave on a high note. 840 00:41:48,560 --> 00:41:51,896 ♪ 841 00:41:51,930 --> 00:41:53,698 I want to leave... 842 00:41:53,731 --> 00:41:56,401 ♪ 843 00:41:56,434 --> 00:41:58,136 still loving this. 844 00:41:58,170 --> 00:42:06,243 ♪ 845 00:42:11,348 --> 00:42:13,450 I was hoping this would be an easier decision. 846 00:42:13,484 --> 00:42:21,491 ♪ 847 00:42:24,794 --> 00:42:27,296 I just can't get enough to eat. 848 00:42:27,329 --> 00:42:29,298 Where my fishing hole was, I can see these waves-- 849 00:42:29,331 --> 00:42:31,166 bam--just crashing against it. 850 00:42:31,200 --> 00:42:33,502 Not very happy about it. 851 00:42:33,535 --> 00:42:34,636 I just woke up. 852 00:42:34,669 --> 00:42:36,271 My sleeping bag is soaked. 853 00:42:36,305 --> 00:42:38,907 It looks like it's groundwater, seeped through. 854 00:42:38,940 --> 00:42:40,608 This is [bleep] ridiculous. 855 00:42:40,641 --> 00:42:42,876 Another day of boatbuilding. 856 00:42:42,910 --> 00:42:45,246 I sure hope to have her in the water in time 857 00:42:45,279 --> 00:42:47,415 to get to that salmon run. 858 00:42:47,448 --> 00:42:48,916 A sweat lodge is one of those things 859 00:42:48,949 --> 00:42:50,651 that feeds you spiritually. 860 00:42:50,684 --> 00:42:52,920 I think it'll probably help me make a decision. 861 00:42:52,953 --> 00:42:55,055 I have to figure out how long I want to stay here. 862 00:42:55,088 --> 00:42:59,859 ♪ 55036

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