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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,400 --> 00:00:04,460 (Transcribed by TurboScribe. Go Unlimited to remove this message.) Who is it? 2 00:00:04,820 --> 00:00:05,760 It's Chris. 3 00:00:08,720 --> 00:00:09,760 Just a second. 4 00:00:15,640 --> 00:00:16,780 Hey, what's going on? 5 00:00:16,900 --> 00:00:18,300 I'm sorry to bother you, John. 6 00:00:18,720 --> 00:00:19,360 No problem. 7 00:00:19,560 --> 00:00:20,100 Everything all right? 8 00:00:20,400 --> 00:00:23,000 Yeah, yeah, it's just that I was upstairs 9 00:00:23,000 --> 00:00:24,900 alone in my place thinking that you were 10 00:00:24,900 --> 00:00:27,500 down here alone in your place and... 11 00:00:27,500 --> 00:00:27,900 And what? 12 00:00:28,680 --> 00:00:30,520 And suddenly I just felt like... 13 00:00:30,520 --> 00:00:31,000 Like what? 14 00:00:31,119 --> 00:00:31,720 Felt like what? 15 00:00:32,160 --> 00:00:33,620 Like I had to do this. 16 00:00:42,590 --> 00:00:43,890 What the hell was that? 17 00:00:54,280 --> 00:00:56,300 Harrison, here's a piece of advice. 18 00:00:56,480 --> 00:00:58,340 If you're gonna go camping, either learn what 19 00:00:58,340 --> 00:01:01,280 poison ivy looks like or bring toilet paper, 20 00:01:01,400 --> 00:01:02,160 you moron. 21 00:01:04,700 --> 00:01:07,040 That must have been hard to look at. 22 00:01:07,040 --> 00:01:09,260 Another ass with a rash. 23 00:01:12,160 --> 00:01:14,540 Part of the glamour I call my life. 24 00:01:15,660 --> 00:01:18,180 John, I put insurance forms on your desk 25 00:01:18,180 --> 00:01:18,820 three days ago. 26 00:01:18,900 --> 00:01:19,800 Did you sign them yet? 27 00:01:20,420 --> 00:01:21,920 You know, I hate it when you ask 28 00:01:21,920 --> 00:01:23,660 questions you already know the answer to. 29 00:01:24,140 --> 00:01:24,940 Do you really? 30 00:01:25,260 --> 00:01:26,720 Yeah, see, right there, you're doing it. 31 00:01:27,860 --> 00:01:28,700 You're late. 32 00:01:32,580 --> 00:01:34,700 I'm sorry, Margaret, but it's not my fault. 33 00:01:34,700 --> 00:01:36,980 My taxi was hit by a runaway hot 34 00:01:36,980 --> 00:01:37,660 dog cart. 35 00:01:38,620 --> 00:01:40,820 Of all the lame excuses. 36 00:01:41,020 --> 00:01:41,840 It's the truth. 37 00:01:41,880 --> 00:01:43,260 I'm lucky to be alive. 38 00:01:43,940 --> 00:01:46,920 Yesterday, the president's motorcade broke down and he 39 00:01:46,920 --> 00:01:48,880 ran inside to use your toilet. 40 00:01:52,320 --> 00:01:53,800 Okay, that wasn't true. 41 00:01:53,980 --> 00:01:55,240 Oh, the day before that... 42 00:01:55,240 --> 00:01:57,400 All right, I lie all the time, but 43 00:01:57,400 --> 00:01:58,960 this is clearly not a lie. 44 00:01:59,240 --> 00:02:01,320 My lies have flair and imagination. 45 00:02:01,320 --> 00:02:04,160 This whole hot dog story is beneath me. 46 00:02:04,440 --> 00:02:06,860 Ooh, what is that smell? 47 00:02:07,120 --> 00:02:08,120 Hot dog juice! 48 00:02:08,139 --> 00:02:09,180 I'm covered in it! 49 00:02:09,259 --> 00:02:10,780 Go ahead, taste my coat. 50 00:02:11,020 --> 00:02:14,240 Oh, my God, you really were in an 51 00:02:14,240 --> 00:02:14,560 accident. 52 00:02:14,700 --> 00:02:15,520 Are you all right? 53 00:02:15,900 --> 00:02:17,680 My head hurts and I smell like a 54 00:02:17,680 --> 00:02:18,480 big wiener. 55 00:02:21,900 --> 00:02:23,200 I'm so sorry. 56 00:02:24,420 --> 00:02:26,460 Yeah, well, I'm all right now, but not 57 00:02:26,460 --> 00:02:27,100 for long. 58 00:02:27,900 --> 00:02:30,480 Yesterday, my purse was stolen and now this. 59 00:02:30,480 --> 00:02:32,060 That's two down, one to go. 60 00:02:32,160 --> 00:02:33,660 I'm in big trouble, Margaret. 61 00:02:33,820 --> 00:02:35,180 What are you talking about? 62 00:02:35,520 --> 00:02:37,580 Bad things always happen in threes. 63 00:02:38,040 --> 00:02:39,600 Celebrities die in threes. 64 00:02:39,860 --> 00:02:41,600 Three in a match is bad luck. 65 00:02:41,880 --> 00:02:43,300 Three strikes and you're out. 66 00:02:43,540 --> 00:02:44,580 That's from baseball. 67 00:02:45,100 --> 00:02:47,300 Oh, well, thank you for clearing that up. 68 00:02:47,720 --> 00:02:50,040 But, Linda, this whole notion of bad things 69 00:02:50,040 --> 00:02:52,840 happening in threes, that's just a silly superstition. 70 00:02:53,500 --> 00:02:55,440 Oh, tell that to my great-aunt Hilda. 71 00:02:55,540 --> 00:02:57,660 You fell off Mount Everest after being kicked 72 00:02:57,660 --> 00:02:58,460 by a yak. 73 00:02:59,620 --> 00:03:01,400 That's only two bad things. 74 00:03:01,540 --> 00:03:03,100 The yak kicked her twice. 75 00:03:04,620 --> 00:03:06,020 Lord, give me strength. 76 00:03:06,420 --> 00:03:07,540 You said it, sister. 77 00:03:08,220 --> 00:03:10,000 I need all the help I can get. 78 00:03:11,320 --> 00:03:12,180 What are you doing? 79 00:03:12,880 --> 00:03:14,780 Wishing I'd closed that door. 80 00:03:16,020 --> 00:03:17,720 Well, if you're looking for something to do, 81 00:03:17,780 --> 00:03:20,500 perhaps you can finish these insurance forms like 82 00:03:20,500 --> 00:03:21,160 I asked you to. 83 00:03:21,660 --> 00:03:22,180 Fine. 84 00:03:22,540 --> 00:03:25,300 Dr. John, leave me the hell alone. 85 00:03:25,300 --> 00:03:27,600 Are you happy now? 86 00:03:28,000 --> 00:03:30,220 You've been barking at people all morning. 87 00:03:30,300 --> 00:03:30,980 What's wrong with you? 88 00:03:31,000 --> 00:03:32,400 If I wanted to talk about it, I'd 89 00:03:32,400 --> 00:03:33,740 talk about it, but I don't want to 90 00:03:33,740 --> 00:03:34,480 talk about it. 91 00:03:34,780 --> 00:03:35,300 Fine. 92 00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:37,740 Can't you tell I want to talk about 93 00:03:37,740 --> 00:03:37,900 it? 94 00:03:40,640 --> 00:03:42,240 You are such a child. 95 00:03:42,860 --> 00:03:44,040 Okay, what is it? 96 00:03:46,600 --> 00:03:48,340 You ever have bad dreams? 97 00:03:49,340 --> 00:03:52,500 Well, sometimes I dream that I'm trapped beneath 98 00:03:52,500 --> 00:03:54,940 a giant blob of mashed potatoes, but then 99 00:03:54,940 --> 00:03:56,760 I wake up and find Lewis on top 100 00:03:56,760 --> 00:03:57,060 of me. 101 00:03:58,780 --> 00:04:00,560 At least you got the picture of Mr. 102 00:04:00,780 --> 00:04:02,740 Pearson's blistered ass out of my head. 103 00:04:04,860 --> 00:04:07,360 Well, John, if you're having restless nights, maybe 104 00:04:07,360 --> 00:04:09,280 you should just lay off to Chinese takeout 105 00:04:09,280 --> 00:04:10,060 before bed. 106 00:04:10,200 --> 00:04:11,380 It's not indigestion. 107 00:04:11,480 --> 00:04:12,420 It's something else. 108 00:04:14,340 --> 00:04:17,779 I keep having this dream about Chris. 109 00:04:18,620 --> 00:04:19,620 What kind of dream? 110 00:04:19,620 --> 00:04:25,940 Oh, that kind of dream. 111 00:04:27,660 --> 00:04:29,680 Yes, that kind of dream, and I know 112 00:04:29,680 --> 00:04:31,160 what you're going to say, that I like 113 00:04:31,160 --> 00:04:32,040 her, but I don't. 114 00:04:33,120 --> 00:04:35,140 When was the last time you had... 115 00:04:35,140 --> 00:04:37,100 Eight months ago, not that it's any of 116 00:04:37,100 --> 00:04:37,740 your business. 117 00:04:38,840 --> 00:04:40,960 Well, I was going to say, when was 118 00:04:40,960 --> 00:04:43,640 the last time you had a cigarette, but 119 00:04:43,640 --> 00:04:45,700 that does explain all the bad mornings. 120 00:04:47,820 --> 00:04:49,600 I quit smoking three weeks ago. 121 00:04:50,520 --> 00:04:53,740 My guess is you're probably just craving nicotine, 122 00:04:53,880 --> 00:04:55,780 and your mind is making you think that 123 00:04:55,780 --> 00:04:56,660 it's something else. 124 00:04:57,060 --> 00:04:57,760 You think so? 125 00:04:57,880 --> 00:04:58,300 Mm-hmm. 126 00:04:58,560 --> 00:05:00,180 Why don't you just go on the patch? 127 00:05:00,240 --> 00:05:01,060 Maybe that'll help. 128 00:05:02,120 --> 00:05:03,720 No, no, I'll just puff it out. 129 00:05:03,880 --> 00:05:05,160 Oh, come on, John. 130 00:05:05,400 --> 00:05:07,080 Why don't you for once in your life 131 00:05:07,080 --> 00:05:08,200 do something easy? 132 00:05:08,340 --> 00:05:09,840 If not for you, then for those of 133 00:05:09,840 --> 00:05:11,780 us who have to be around you. 134 00:05:12,400 --> 00:05:14,480 Come on, I know you got some samples 135 00:05:14,480 --> 00:05:15,720 around here somewhere. 136 00:05:16,100 --> 00:05:17,600 Linda, the phone! 137 00:05:17,780 --> 00:05:19,180 Oh, yeah, here's one. 138 00:05:19,180 --> 00:05:20,520 Roll up your sleeve. 139 00:05:21,540 --> 00:05:22,880 Margaret, I don't think I... 140 00:05:22,880 --> 00:05:25,120 Oh, come on, give it a try. 141 00:05:25,320 --> 00:05:25,940 It's free. 142 00:05:26,340 --> 00:05:28,320 Your favorite four-letter word. 143 00:05:30,440 --> 00:05:32,560 No, it's not my favorite, but it's right 144 00:05:32,560 --> 00:05:32,960 up there. 145 00:05:34,200 --> 00:05:36,440 Linda, answer that damn phone, will you? 146 00:05:36,600 --> 00:05:37,360 I can't. 147 00:05:37,360 --> 00:05:39,220 It could be bad thing number three. 148 00:05:40,600 --> 00:05:41,080 Shocking. 149 00:05:41,200 --> 00:05:42,780 I have no idea what she's talking about. 150 00:05:44,500 --> 00:05:46,320 Yes, Dr. John Becker here. 151 00:05:46,840 --> 00:05:48,140 All right, thanks very much. 152 00:05:48,560 --> 00:05:49,560 That's the lab. 153 00:05:49,660 --> 00:05:51,020 Their fax machine broke. 154 00:05:51,080 --> 00:05:53,060 Run over and bring the test results back, 155 00:05:53,120 --> 00:05:53,600 will you, please? 156 00:05:53,680 --> 00:05:55,400 Oh, no, no, I can't do that. 157 00:05:55,960 --> 00:05:57,560 What if I get to the lab and 158 00:05:57,560 --> 00:05:58,820 no one's at the front desk? 159 00:05:58,920 --> 00:06:00,500 I'll have to walk into the back to 160 00:06:00,500 --> 00:06:01,180 find somebody. 161 00:06:01,340 --> 00:06:03,020 Next thing I know, I walk into the 162 00:06:03,020 --> 00:06:04,920 wrong room, the door slams shut, and I'm 163 00:06:04,920 --> 00:06:06,800 stuck in the freezer with all the hearts. 164 00:06:08,980 --> 00:06:10,680 Linda, if you don't want to do it, 165 00:06:10,740 --> 00:06:11,440 just say so. 166 00:06:12,280 --> 00:06:13,980 Oh, I didn't know I could do that. 167 00:06:15,300 --> 00:06:16,460 I don't want to do it. 168 00:06:21,380 --> 00:06:22,720 I don't want to do it. 169 00:06:22,960 --> 00:06:24,980 Hey, guys. 170 00:06:25,300 --> 00:06:25,580 Hey. 171 00:06:26,060 --> 00:06:28,620 Chris, can I have some coffee, please? 172 00:06:29,800 --> 00:06:31,260 Just give me a second, honey. 173 00:06:31,300 --> 00:06:32,140 I'll be right with you. 174 00:06:34,780 --> 00:06:36,220 What the hell was that about? 175 00:06:37,220 --> 00:06:38,400 What the hell was what about? 176 00:06:40,660 --> 00:06:42,240 Uh, nothing. 177 00:06:43,560 --> 00:06:45,280 Just coffee, please. 178 00:06:47,180 --> 00:06:47,480 Ah. 179 00:06:47,480 --> 00:06:49,240 Everything I put in my mouth just kills 180 00:06:49,240 --> 00:06:49,540 me. 181 00:06:50,080 --> 00:06:50,960 Becca, you're a doctor. 182 00:06:51,260 --> 00:06:51,720 Do me a favor. 183 00:06:51,820 --> 00:06:52,760 Take a look in here, will you? 184 00:06:53,460 --> 00:06:54,600 I'd rather die. 185 00:06:56,700 --> 00:06:57,400 Come on, Becca. 186 00:06:57,460 --> 00:06:58,420 I got something in my mouth. 187 00:06:58,500 --> 00:06:59,700 I don't know if it's a canker sore 188 00:06:59,700 --> 00:07:01,580 or an abscess or maybe it's a boil. 189 00:07:01,860 --> 00:07:03,720 Oh, that's disgusting. 190 00:07:03,920 --> 00:07:04,600 You want to feel it? 191 00:07:04,680 --> 00:07:04,980 No! 192 00:07:06,500 --> 00:07:07,760 All right, John, as long as you're giving 193 00:07:07,760 --> 00:07:08,620 free medical advice. 194 00:07:08,640 --> 00:07:09,600 Yeah, I'm not. 195 00:07:09,680 --> 00:07:10,900 I'm trying to have lunch here. 196 00:07:10,920 --> 00:07:11,160 No, come on. 197 00:07:11,180 --> 00:07:12,180 This will just take a second. 198 00:07:12,280 --> 00:07:13,380 There's something you got to look at. 199 00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:16,940 I got this irritation under my pants. 200 00:07:18,880 --> 00:07:20,860 Now, it's right where the waistband of my 201 00:07:20,860 --> 00:07:22,060 underwear hits my skin. 202 00:07:22,240 --> 00:07:24,020 Jake, I'm not looking in your underwear. 203 00:07:24,080 --> 00:07:25,240 Well, I'm not wearing underwear. 204 00:07:27,380 --> 00:07:29,300 It's too uncomfortable, so if you could just 205 00:07:29,300 --> 00:07:30,420 take a look at it real quick. 206 00:07:30,440 --> 00:07:31,100 Hey, forget it. 207 00:07:31,560 --> 00:07:33,540 You know, on the off chance my appetite 208 00:07:33,540 --> 00:07:35,420 comes back, can I have a turkey sandwich, 209 00:07:35,640 --> 00:07:35,900 please? 210 00:07:36,380 --> 00:07:38,100 Unless, of course, you got something that needs 211 00:07:38,100 --> 00:07:39,320 medical attention, too. 212 00:07:39,880 --> 00:07:42,280 Well, now that you mention it, my stomach's 213 00:07:42,280 --> 00:07:43,200 been feeling weird. 214 00:07:43,560 --> 00:07:45,200 It's not really an ache as much as 215 00:07:45,200 --> 00:07:46,060 a dull pain. 216 00:07:46,180 --> 00:07:47,900 For God's sake, you know, I only have 217 00:07:47,900 --> 00:07:49,760 to care about people when I'm at the 218 00:07:49,760 --> 00:07:50,140 office. 219 00:07:50,220 --> 00:07:50,580 Oh! 220 00:07:51,440 --> 00:07:52,800 I think it just burst! 221 00:07:52,900 --> 00:07:53,020 Oh! 222 00:07:54,440 --> 00:07:56,120 Make that sandwich to go. 223 00:07:56,220 --> 00:07:57,680 Oh, come on, Becker, just eyeball this thing. 224 00:07:57,680 --> 00:07:59,720 Come on, John, just reach into my pants. 225 00:07:59,800 --> 00:08:00,640 You don't have to look. 226 00:08:02,040 --> 00:08:03,400 Just give it a little feel. 227 00:08:03,580 --> 00:08:04,520 Oh, geez. 228 00:08:04,560 --> 00:08:06,340 Come on, guys, you heard him. 229 00:08:06,340 --> 00:08:07,100 He's on a break. 230 00:08:07,140 --> 00:08:07,880 Leave him alone. 231 00:08:07,980 --> 00:08:08,660 Thank you. 232 00:08:08,660 --> 00:08:10,900 I mean, you work so hard, and everyone 233 00:08:10,900 --> 00:08:11,980 asks so much of you. 234 00:08:12,040 --> 00:08:13,140 You're only one person. 235 00:08:13,220 --> 00:08:14,620 Doesn't anybody think about your needs? 236 00:08:14,680 --> 00:08:15,800 No, no, they don't. 237 00:08:15,880 --> 00:08:16,160 Yeah. 238 00:08:17,660 --> 00:08:19,860 You must be so stressed out. 239 00:08:20,620 --> 00:08:22,540 I wish I could take you away and 240 00:08:22,540 --> 00:08:24,380 show you how to really relax. 241 00:08:25,680 --> 00:08:27,420 I bet that feels better. 242 00:08:29,860 --> 00:08:30,300 Huh? 243 00:08:31,039 --> 00:08:32,179 What did you just say? 244 00:08:33,100 --> 00:08:34,440 I said, here's your sandwich. 245 00:08:37,440 --> 00:08:39,340 Not a good that did. 246 00:08:54,650 --> 00:08:55,890 Who is it? 247 00:08:56,230 --> 00:08:56,990 It's Chris. 248 00:09:00,050 --> 00:09:01,130 Just a second. 249 00:09:08,120 --> 00:09:09,520 Hey, what's going on? 250 00:09:09,540 --> 00:09:10,960 Sorry to bother you, John. 251 00:09:11,160 --> 00:09:11,820 No problem. 252 00:09:11,960 --> 00:09:12,580 Everything all right? 253 00:09:12,960 --> 00:09:15,600 Yeah, yeah, it's just that I was upstairs, 254 00:09:15,600 --> 00:09:18,580 alone in my place, thinking that you're probably 255 00:09:18,580 --> 00:09:20,820 down here, alone in your place, and... 256 00:09:21,120 --> 00:09:21,540 And what? 257 00:09:22,180 --> 00:09:24,440 And I suddenly just felt like... 258 00:09:24,440 --> 00:09:24,900 Like what? 259 00:09:24,960 --> 00:09:25,580 Felt like what? 260 00:09:26,480 --> 00:09:28,160 Like I needed to do this. 261 00:09:33,560 --> 00:09:35,380 I don't know if this is such a 262 00:09:35,380 --> 00:09:35,820 good idea. 263 00:09:36,060 --> 00:09:36,200 Shh. 264 00:09:36,200 --> 00:09:36,420 Shh. 265 00:09:44,020 --> 00:09:46,120 Oh, it's awfully hot in here. 266 00:09:47,580 --> 00:09:49,220 Yeah, this is crazy. 267 00:09:49,640 --> 00:09:50,500 I gotta wake up. 268 00:09:52,860 --> 00:09:53,880 Okay, in a minute. 269 00:09:57,580 --> 00:09:58,560 My mouth hurts. 270 00:09:58,620 --> 00:09:59,260 Look at my pants. 271 00:09:59,300 --> 00:10:00,160 Hey, I was here first. 272 00:10:00,180 --> 00:10:01,000 We came here together. 273 00:10:01,080 --> 00:10:01,440 Help me. 274 00:10:01,520 --> 00:10:01,940 Help me. 275 00:10:02,000 --> 00:10:02,400 Help me. 276 00:10:02,460 --> 00:10:02,840 Help me. 277 00:10:02,920 --> 00:10:03,340 Help me. 278 00:10:03,700 --> 00:10:04,240 Help me. 279 00:10:20,310 --> 00:10:23,110 This cream the doctor prescribed doesn't work. 280 00:10:24,470 --> 00:10:27,370 So nice to see you again, Mrs. Weigand. 281 00:10:28,490 --> 00:10:30,850 Seems like you were just here yesterday. 282 00:10:31,330 --> 00:10:33,590 Well, I was here yesterday, and every other 283 00:10:33,590 --> 00:10:34,510 day this week. 284 00:10:34,690 --> 00:10:36,010 My rash came back. 285 00:10:36,070 --> 00:10:37,830 Do you know how annoying that is? 286 00:10:38,290 --> 00:10:40,590 Yes, I know how annoying it is when 287 00:10:40,590 --> 00:10:42,570 you think something has gone away and it 288 00:10:42,570 --> 00:10:44,650 just keeps coming back bothering you. 289 00:10:47,330 --> 00:10:49,190 Why don't you just go back to room 290 00:10:49,190 --> 00:10:49,450 one? 291 00:10:49,550 --> 00:10:50,850 The doctor will be with you in a 292 00:10:50,850 --> 00:10:51,130 moment. 293 00:10:51,330 --> 00:10:53,490 Well, I hope so, because I don't mind 294 00:10:53,490 --> 00:10:55,190 telling you that I have better things to 295 00:10:55,190 --> 00:10:57,310 do than to come here day after day. 296 00:10:57,530 --> 00:10:59,190 It's a big pain in the ass. 297 00:11:01,270 --> 00:11:02,350 Yes, you are. 298 00:11:05,490 --> 00:11:07,070 I know I'm late, but I had to 299 00:11:07,070 --> 00:11:08,830 walk here all the way from Manhattan. 300 00:11:09,550 --> 00:11:11,110 Oh, please don't tell me that this is 301 00:11:11,110 --> 00:11:12,970 about that silly superstition. 302 00:11:12,990 --> 00:11:14,550 It's not a superstition. 303 00:11:14,550 --> 00:11:15,310 It's real. 304 00:11:15,650 --> 00:11:16,930 Bad luck comes in threes. 305 00:11:17,110 --> 00:11:18,530 Look it up in the dictionary. 306 00:11:19,050 --> 00:11:19,570 Under what? 307 00:11:20,050 --> 00:11:21,830 Under all those other books over there. 308 00:11:24,710 --> 00:11:26,930 So you walked here? 309 00:11:27,370 --> 00:11:30,170 Well, I couldn't very well take public transportation. 310 00:11:30,710 --> 00:11:31,710 Buses collide. 311 00:11:32,210 --> 00:11:33,150 Trains crash. 312 00:11:33,290 --> 00:11:34,230 Bridges collapse. 313 00:11:34,290 --> 00:11:37,130 So instead, you thought it was safer to 314 00:11:37,130 --> 00:11:39,570 walk through some of the most dangerous neighborhoods 315 00:11:39,570 --> 00:11:40,350 in New York? 316 00:11:40,610 --> 00:11:42,430 Well, I couldn't very well run in these 317 00:11:42,430 --> 00:11:42,750 heels. 318 00:11:42,750 --> 00:11:45,150 Oh, God help me. 319 00:11:45,290 --> 00:11:47,490 Just take Mr. Maggio back to room two 320 00:11:47,490 --> 00:11:48,470 and get his vitals. 321 00:11:48,830 --> 00:11:50,130 I don't think so. 322 00:11:51,730 --> 00:11:53,450 Now, how could that be dangerous? 323 00:11:54,430 --> 00:11:55,770 Mr. Maggio's cute. 324 00:11:55,910 --> 00:11:56,590 So am I. 325 00:11:57,030 --> 00:11:58,790 He'd ask me out, but then he'd end 326 00:11:58,790 --> 00:11:59,930 up breaking my heart. 327 00:12:00,150 --> 00:12:02,090 Then I'd grow old and bitter and die 328 00:12:02,090 --> 00:12:03,890 alone in an apartment full of cats. 329 00:12:03,930 --> 00:12:06,090 And as you know, I'm allergic to cats. 330 00:12:08,030 --> 00:12:09,930 Okay, okay, enough. 331 00:12:10,170 --> 00:12:12,570 This whole thing has just gone far enough. 332 00:12:12,570 --> 00:12:14,710 I mean, look how this is upsetting you. 333 00:12:15,090 --> 00:12:17,670 You are pale, you are shaking, and you're 334 00:12:17,670 --> 00:12:18,570 breaking out. 335 00:12:18,930 --> 00:12:19,470 And what? 336 00:12:22,250 --> 00:12:23,470 It's a pimple. 337 00:12:24,090 --> 00:12:25,650 Margaret, I have a pimple. 338 00:12:26,330 --> 00:12:26,910 So? 339 00:12:27,230 --> 00:12:28,670 So, that's fantastic. 340 00:12:28,810 --> 00:12:30,170 That's bad thing number three. 341 00:12:30,270 --> 00:12:30,950 It's over. 342 00:12:33,150 --> 00:12:35,590 Oh, this is gonna be huge. 343 00:12:36,470 --> 00:12:39,050 I am so happy for you. 344 00:12:39,050 --> 00:12:42,550 Now, will you please take Mr. Maggio back 345 00:12:42,550 --> 00:12:43,690 to room two? 346 00:12:44,270 --> 00:12:45,890 And let him see me like this? 347 00:12:45,930 --> 00:12:46,890 I don't think so. 348 00:12:51,630 --> 00:12:54,390 The bad news is Mrs. Wigand is in 349 00:12:54,390 --> 00:12:55,150 room one. 350 00:12:55,470 --> 00:12:56,550 Her rash is back. 351 00:12:56,990 --> 00:12:58,770 It's red and irritating. 352 00:12:58,890 --> 00:13:00,510 That is also the good news. 353 00:13:00,670 --> 00:13:02,550 Now, I know that's not nice, but I 354 00:13:02,550 --> 00:13:03,050 hate her. 355 00:13:05,030 --> 00:13:07,790 Margaret, I don't treat Mrs. Wigand because I 356 00:13:07,790 --> 00:13:08,370 like her. 357 00:13:08,370 --> 00:13:11,230 I treat her because she has great insurance. 358 00:13:12,870 --> 00:13:13,990 Dr. Becker! 359 00:13:14,410 --> 00:13:15,150 Oh, brother. 360 00:13:15,290 --> 00:13:16,170 You look tired. 361 00:13:16,230 --> 00:13:16,890 Are you all right? 362 00:13:17,010 --> 00:13:19,510 Oh, yeah, I'm just not getting enough sleep. 363 00:13:19,610 --> 00:13:21,450 I'm still having those stupid dreams. 364 00:13:21,850 --> 00:13:22,910 Even with the patch? 365 00:13:23,170 --> 00:13:24,410 Oh, it didn't help. 366 00:13:24,510 --> 00:13:26,210 It has nothing to do with nicotine anyway. 367 00:13:27,430 --> 00:13:29,950 Obviously, I still have feelings for Chris. 368 00:13:30,510 --> 00:13:32,030 Well, then, why don't you talk to her 369 00:13:32,030 --> 00:13:32,610 about it? 370 00:13:32,910 --> 00:13:34,490 Talk's not gonna do any good. 371 00:13:34,590 --> 00:13:36,070 She doesn't feel the same way. 372 00:13:36,070 --> 00:13:38,050 I'm just gonna have to move on. 373 00:13:38,210 --> 00:13:39,450 It's as simple as that. 374 00:13:39,510 --> 00:13:40,430 Dr. Becker! 375 00:13:41,650 --> 00:13:43,490 I know just how you feel. 376 00:13:43,790 --> 00:13:45,510 When I was in nursing school, I had 377 00:13:45,510 --> 00:13:47,910 some pretty intense feelings for a nurse in 378 00:13:47,910 --> 00:13:48,590 my class. 379 00:13:49,650 --> 00:13:51,190 Margaret, I had no idea you were... 380 00:13:51,190 --> 00:13:52,570 A male nurse. 381 00:13:55,370 --> 00:13:56,370 Dr. Becker! 382 00:13:59,160 --> 00:14:00,400 Walter was so great. 383 00:14:00,620 --> 00:14:03,040 Oh, he was smart, handsome, funny. 384 00:14:03,320 --> 00:14:05,920 We used to practice taking each other's blood 385 00:14:05,920 --> 00:14:07,460 pressure, and when he would take mine, I 386 00:14:07,460 --> 00:14:08,960 swear, it would just shoot right through the 387 00:14:08,960 --> 00:14:09,260 roof. 388 00:14:10,020 --> 00:14:11,980 But the problem was, he didn't feel the 389 00:14:11,980 --> 00:14:12,460 same way. 390 00:14:12,760 --> 00:14:15,180 Is anybody gonna help me? 391 00:14:17,390 --> 00:14:18,230 Excuse me. 392 00:14:23,910 --> 00:14:25,710 So, how long did it take you to 393 00:14:25,710 --> 00:14:27,810 get over this Walter guy? 394 00:14:28,430 --> 00:14:30,570 If I ever do, I'll let you know. 395 00:14:31,490 --> 00:14:32,930 Well, that's a horrible story. 396 00:14:33,030 --> 00:14:34,670 How's that supposed to make me feel better? 397 00:14:35,310 --> 00:14:36,150 Dr. Becker! 398 00:14:38,970 --> 00:14:39,910 Lord have mercy. 399 00:14:39,910 --> 00:14:43,370 The point is, unrequited love is a bitch, 400 00:14:43,910 --> 00:14:45,330 and so is Mrs. Wigan. 401 00:14:54,140 --> 00:14:54,900 Hey, Jay. 402 00:14:55,120 --> 00:14:55,600 Chris here. 403 00:14:56,120 --> 00:14:57,640 Uh, no, she went to the drugstore to 404 00:14:57,640 --> 00:14:58,680 get something for her stomach. 405 00:15:00,260 --> 00:15:00,660 Good. 406 00:15:01,600 --> 00:15:03,740 Good meaning you're happy she's not feeling well? 407 00:15:03,740 --> 00:15:05,660 No, good, just I don't want to see 408 00:15:05,660 --> 00:15:06,260 her right now. 409 00:15:06,820 --> 00:15:08,440 Oh, is there something going on between you 410 00:15:08,440 --> 00:15:08,640 two? 411 00:15:09,960 --> 00:15:12,080 Well, you know, keep it to yourself, but 412 00:15:12,080 --> 00:15:16,140 I keep having this dream about Chris. 413 00:15:16,340 --> 00:15:18,540 What, you mean that kind of dream? 414 00:15:18,920 --> 00:15:20,660 Why does everybody ask me that? 415 00:15:20,740 --> 00:15:22,040 Do you think I'd be upset if I 416 00:15:22,040 --> 00:15:23,280 had a dream where Chris and I are 417 00:15:23,280 --> 00:15:24,720 at Macy's shopping for luggage? 418 00:15:24,840 --> 00:15:25,940 Of course I want to have a dream. 419 00:15:27,140 --> 00:15:27,880 Take it easy. 420 00:15:27,980 --> 00:15:28,820 I'm just trying to make sure. 421 00:15:29,120 --> 00:15:29,880 Well, pay attention. 422 00:15:30,080 --> 00:15:30,300 Okay. 423 00:15:32,340 --> 00:15:34,020 In the dream, she comes to my apartment, 424 00:15:34,140 --> 00:15:37,240 and we start kissing, and there's some groping. 425 00:15:37,980 --> 00:15:38,940 It's awful, man. 426 00:15:38,940 --> 00:15:39,780 What do you think it means? 427 00:15:39,780 --> 00:15:41,460 Well, if it's awful, it means you're gay. 428 00:15:43,160 --> 00:15:44,100 I don't know. 429 00:15:44,180 --> 00:15:46,680 It's awful because if I'm dreaming about her, 430 00:15:46,720 --> 00:15:48,320 it means I still like her, and she 431 00:15:48,320 --> 00:15:49,620 doesn't feel the same way. 432 00:15:49,720 --> 00:15:50,720 Well, what are you going to do about 433 00:15:50,720 --> 00:15:50,840 it? 434 00:15:51,740 --> 00:15:53,260 There's nothing I can do. 435 00:15:53,360 --> 00:15:55,320 It's just like Walter, you know? 436 00:15:55,360 --> 00:15:56,740 I'm going to be obsessing for the next 437 00:15:56,740 --> 00:15:57,800 25 years. 438 00:15:58,480 --> 00:15:59,140 Who's Walter? 439 00:15:59,580 --> 00:16:00,200 A nurse. 440 00:16:02,620 --> 00:16:03,300 Excuse me? 441 00:16:03,460 --> 00:16:04,500 That's a long story. 442 00:16:04,520 --> 00:16:05,280 I hope so. 443 00:16:07,620 --> 00:16:08,580 Hey, guys, what's up? 444 00:16:08,840 --> 00:16:09,640 Oh, no, nothing. 445 00:16:10,560 --> 00:16:11,380 Hey, wait, wait, wait. 446 00:16:12,340 --> 00:16:13,180 What was that about? 447 00:16:13,360 --> 00:16:14,460 The minute I walked in here, you guys 448 00:16:14,460 --> 00:16:14,960 stopped talking. 449 00:16:15,040 --> 00:16:15,780 Were you talking about me? 450 00:16:15,920 --> 00:16:16,220 No. 451 00:16:16,820 --> 00:16:18,640 Well, what were you talking about? 452 00:16:18,960 --> 00:16:19,320 Weather. 453 00:16:19,420 --> 00:16:19,780 Baseball. 454 00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:20,740 Baseball weather. 455 00:16:23,100 --> 00:16:23,640 Wait a minute. 456 00:16:23,700 --> 00:16:24,280 So it is me. 457 00:16:24,520 --> 00:16:25,000 What is it? 458 00:16:25,220 --> 00:16:27,480 My cologne, my leather jacket, my Cabbage Patch 459 00:16:27,480 --> 00:16:27,820 dolls? 460 00:16:30,920 --> 00:16:31,600 Excuse me? 461 00:16:31,720 --> 00:16:31,920 What? 462 00:16:32,000 --> 00:16:33,080 They're a good investment, okay? 463 00:16:34,160 --> 00:16:35,820 And they have names, so you can't just 464 00:16:35,820 --> 00:16:36,320 throw them out. 465 00:16:38,360 --> 00:16:39,580 Come on, we don't keep secrets. 466 00:16:39,660 --> 00:16:40,140 We're friends. 467 00:16:40,320 --> 00:16:41,500 No one's going to judge you, right? 468 00:16:41,640 --> 00:16:42,240 Okay, okay. 469 00:16:42,380 --> 00:16:44,120 Well, John's having dreams about Chris. 470 00:16:44,480 --> 00:16:44,840 Loser. 471 00:16:47,520 --> 00:16:48,960 Why don't you quit banging your head against 472 00:16:48,960 --> 00:16:49,380 the wall? 473 00:16:49,560 --> 00:16:51,100 The woman's made it perfectly clear that she 474 00:16:51,100 --> 00:16:52,640 wants absolutely nothing to do with you. 475 00:16:52,780 --> 00:16:54,060 But why don't you just take the hint 476 00:16:54,060 --> 00:16:54,960 and get over her? 477 00:16:54,980 --> 00:16:56,640 Why don't you mind your own business? 478 00:16:56,860 --> 00:16:57,540 I can do that. 479 00:16:58,520 --> 00:17:00,200 Or I can give you some advice and 480 00:17:00,200 --> 00:17:00,700 help you out. 481 00:17:00,700 --> 00:17:01,520 Oh, yeah? 482 00:17:01,600 --> 00:17:03,140 I'm going to take advice from you? 483 00:17:03,420 --> 00:17:04,660 Uh, you know, when it comes to women 484 00:17:04,660 --> 00:17:06,440 not liking you, who knows better than Bob? 485 00:17:09,599 --> 00:17:10,280 All right. 486 00:17:11,119 --> 00:17:12,440 What do you think I should do? 487 00:17:12,760 --> 00:17:13,140 Simple. 488 00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:15,819 Every woman has a certain something special about 489 00:17:15,819 --> 00:17:16,780 her that's disgusting. 490 00:17:17,619 --> 00:17:19,099 All you have to do is find out 491 00:17:19,099 --> 00:17:21,119 what that is and obsess about it. 492 00:17:21,160 --> 00:17:23,040 I mean, the way she talks, walks, eats. 493 00:17:23,260 --> 00:17:24,260 Does she have a club foot? 494 00:17:24,560 --> 00:17:24,980 A hump? 495 00:17:25,280 --> 00:17:26,060 A walleye? 496 00:17:26,220 --> 00:17:27,000 A monobrow? 497 00:17:27,740 --> 00:17:29,020 Maybe even a hairy birthmark. 498 00:17:30,380 --> 00:17:32,120 Whatever it is, just blow it out of 499 00:17:32,120 --> 00:17:34,600 proportion until that's all she is to you. 500 00:17:35,720 --> 00:17:37,060 What else you got, you idiot? 501 00:17:39,480 --> 00:17:41,320 Well, you can always try and find her 502 00:17:41,320 --> 00:17:42,400 mother and see if she's got a big 503 00:17:42,400 --> 00:17:42,760 ass. 504 00:17:43,140 --> 00:17:43,400 What? 505 00:17:43,860 --> 00:17:44,960 Well, you know, that way you know if 506 00:17:44,960 --> 00:17:45,560 you dodged a bullet. 507 00:17:45,900 --> 00:17:46,720 Yeah, but... 508 00:17:47,320 --> 00:17:48,960 What if her mother's got a great ass? 509 00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:49,820 But then you hit on the mother. 510 00:17:49,880 --> 00:17:50,600 What do you want from me? 511 00:17:51,100 --> 00:17:51,420 Go. 512 00:17:51,640 --> 00:17:52,660 Just go, will you? 513 00:17:52,780 --> 00:17:53,300 All right, look. 514 00:17:53,620 --> 00:17:54,960 You want to get rid of every feeling 515 00:17:54,960 --> 00:17:55,840 you've ever had for her? 516 00:17:56,900 --> 00:17:57,460 Marry her. 517 00:17:59,280 --> 00:17:59,820 Lose her. 518 00:18:02,020 --> 00:18:04,180 Well, you could go Bob's way. 519 00:18:04,280 --> 00:18:06,080 Take a trip to Buffalo and size up 520 00:18:06,080 --> 00:18:07,060 her mom's ass. 521 00:18:07,980 --> 00:18:08,380 Or... 522 00:18:08,380 --> 00:18:09,760 And I know this may sound crazy. 523 00:18:10,640 --> 00:18:12,420 You could just tell her how you feel. 524 00:18:13,080 --> 00:18:15,100 I can't tell her the truth, Jay. 525 00:18:15,320 --> 00:18:16,480 Now, Bob's right. 526 00:18:16,500 --> 00:18:17,660 I've been down that road. 527 00:18:17,680 --> 00:18:19,320 And it leads to very bad things. 528 00:18:19,540 --> 00:18:21,580 I don't want to be humiliated again. 529 00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:22,940 Yeah, but what if she has the same 530 00:18:22,940 --> 00:18:23,760 feelings for you? 531 00:18:23,820 --> 00:18:24,960 Well, then she's just going to have to 532 00:18:24,960 --> 00:18:25,960 put herself out there. 533 00:18:25,980 --> 00:18:27,220 She's going to have to tell me. 534 00:18:28,160 --> 00:18:29,540 That's never going to happen. 535 00:18:29,720 --> 00:18:31,240 So I guess the next best thing is 536 00:18:31,240 --> 00:18:33,560 just to obsess over something that I hate 537 00:18:33,560 --> 00:18:34,100 about her. 538 00:18:34,340 --> 00:18:35,000 Like what? 539 00:18:37,460 --> 00:18:38,500 That's a problem. 540 00:18:38,640 --> 00:18:39,740 I can't think of anything. 541 00:18:42,940 --> 00:18:53,100 Oh, no. 542 00:19:02,680 --> 00:19:03,620 Oh, no. 543 00:19:07,200 --> 00:19:07,760 Hi. 544 00:19:09,480 --> 00:19:11,760 I'm sorry to bother you, but I was 545 00:19:11,760 --> 00:19:14,540 upstairs and you're down here, and I just 546 00:19:14,540 --> 00:19:15,840 started to have these feelings. 547 00:19:16,560 --> 00:19:17,920 Yeah, what kind of feelings? 548 00:19:18,320 --> 00:19:18,860 I just... 549 00:19:19,480 --> 00:19:20,000 What? 550 00:19:20,280 --> 00:19:21,720 I just feel like... 551 00:19:21,720 --> 00:19:22,340 What? 552 00:19:23,020 --> 00:19:24,780 I just feel like I need to... 553 00:19:28,320 --> 00:19:28,880 Oh! 554 00:19:28,880 --> 00:19:34,730 Oh, sure, yeah, yeah. 555 00:19:34,790 --> 00:19:36,510 This time it had to be real. 556 00:19:36,510 --> 00:19:37,150 No! 557 00:19:51,780 --> 00:19:53,120 I'm sorry, John. 558 00:19:53,700 --> 00:19:54,600 What are you talking about? 559 00:19:54,660 --> 00:19:55,720 What do you have to be sorry for? 560 00:19:56,020 --> 00:19:56,800 Your carpet. 561 00:19:57,240 --> 00:19:58,800 Oh, I'll have it cleaned. 562 00:19:59,160 --> 00:20:00,980 Yeah, and don't you worry about the bill. 563 00:20:01,420 --> 00:20:02,620 Tell her you're feeling better. 564 00:20:04,700 --> 00:20:06,320 Anyway, you know, it's me who should be 565 00:20:06,320 --> 00:20:07,660 apologizing here. 566 00:20:07,760 --> 00:20:09,520 I mean, you told me your stomach hurt 567 00:20:09,520 --> 00:20:10,260 two days ago. 568 00:20:10,300 --> 00:20:11,340 I didn't take it seriously. 569 00:20:12,020 --> 00:20:13,660 Now, why didn't you tell me it was 570 00:20:13,660 --> 00:20:14,280 this bad? 571 00:20:14,600 --> 00:20:15,740 I thought it would get better. 572 00:20:16,240 --> 00:20:18,900 Well, appendicitis doesn't get better on its own. 573 00:20:19,460 --> 00:20:21,080 I can't believe you've been walking around in 574 00:20:21,080 --> 00:20:21,860 this kind of pain. 575 00:20:23,720 --> 00:20:24,820 Am I gonna be okay? 576 00:20:25,140 --> 00:20:26,560 Oh, sure you are. 577 00:20:26,660 --> 00:20:29,340 This is just a very routine operation. 578 00:20:30,020 --> 00:20:31,460 I'm gonna be with you every minute. 579 00:20:31,580 --> 00:20:32,240 I promise. 580 00:20:35,680 --> 00:20:36,400 You're shivering. 581 00:20:36,820 --> 00:20:37,460 I know. 582 00:20:37,540 --> 00:20:38,660 I asked him to get me a blanket. 583 00:20:38,800 --> 00:20:39,480 I don't know what happened. 584 00:20:39,480 --> 00:20:40,460 Well, you know what? 585 00:20:40,540 --> 00:20:41,320 I'll get you one. 586 00:20:41,360 --> 00:20:42,340 I'm a doctor, you know. 587 00:20:42,400 --> 00:20:44,060 There's a trick about getting what you want 588 00:20:44,060 --> 00:20:44,580 in a hospital. 589 00:20:49,970 --> 00:20:51,450 What the hell are you doing? 590 00:20:52,050 --> 00:20:52,850 Oh, sorry. 591 00:20:52,950 --> 00:20:53,950 I thought you were asleep, pal. 592 00:20:55,950 --> 00:21:00,070 And how are we feeling? 593 00:21:00,290 --> 00:21:01,410 I don't know about you, but I feel 594 00:21:01,410 --> 00:21:02,130 like crap. 595 00:21:03,150 --> 00:21:04,930 Well, this will help with the pain. 596 00:21:05,050 --> 00:21:08,910 It's Damerol, and it takes effect almost immediately. 597 00:21:09,170 --> 00:21:09,890 Oh, thanks. 598 00:21:10,330 --> 00:21:10,930 You're welcome. 599 00:21:12,030 --> 00:21:13,550 Okay, I'll be back soon. 600 00:21:13,550 --> 00:21:15,430 We're almost ready to take you down. 601 00:21:22,130 --> 00:21:23,870 Hey, I told you I'd find one. 602 00:21:24,550 --> 00:21:26,410 Guy I took it from was cold. 603 00:21:27,030 --> 00:21:28,690 Take a lot more than a blanket to 604 00:21:28,690 --> 00:21:29,390 warm him up. 605 00:21:36,360 --> 00:21:36,840 John? 606 00:21:37,220 --> 00:21:37,700 Yeah? 607 00:21:38,380 --> 00:21:39,780 What, are you gonna throw up again? 608 00:21:40,600 --> 00:21:41,080 No. 609 00:21:41,500 --> 00:21:41,760 Oh. 610 00:21:43,380 --> 00:21:44,300 I love you. 611 00:21:47,330 --> 00:21:48,250 What'd you just say? 612 00:21:49,770 --> 00:21:50,730 I love you. 613 00:21:55,990 --> 00:21:56,390 Really? 614 00:21:59,310 --> 00:22:01,190 I never thought I'd hear you say that. 615 00:22:01,290 --> 00:22:02,910 I mean, after all we've been through, I... 616 00:22:04,010 --> 00:22:05,830 Oh, wow, you know, I... 617 00:22:05,830 --> 00:22:08,350 You know, I kind of feel... 618 00:22:08,830 --> 00:22:10,550 You know, I've been thinking about you all 619 00:22:10,550 --> 00:22:10,650 night. 620 00:22:10,670 --> 00:22:12,170 I can't get you out of my mind. 621 00:22:12,270 --> 00:22:13,770 I've been dreaming about you. 622 00:22:16,310 --> 00:22:18,850 Well, I guess this means I think I 623 00:22:18,850 --> 00:22:19,890 love you, too. 624 00:22:21,150 --> 00:22:22,030 No, I do. 625 00:22:22,990 --> 00:22:24,470 My God, I love you. 626 00:22:26,610 --> 00:22:28,670 Well, you know, this is kind of a 627 00:22:28,670 --> 00:22:29,370 big deal. 628 00:22:30,650 --> 00:22:31,710 And how are we feeling? 629 00:22:33,570 --> 00:22:34,690 I love you. 630 00:22:39,960 --> 00:22:40,860 Ready to go? 631 00:22:42,660 --> 00:22:43,820 I love you. 632 00:22:44,180 --> 00:22:45,480 I love you, too. 633 00:22:49,580 --> 00:22:51,000 I love you. 634 00:22:54,340 --> 00:22:56,600 Once you're out of Demerol, they love everything. 635 00:22:58,760 --> 00:23:01,000 I love you. 636 00:23:07,110 --> 00:23:08,110 Loser. 38556

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