Original subtitles

Do you fish?

Have you ever fished?

Okay, well, this is live fishing, with the exception that you're the bait.

It's the oldest profession in the world, so they say.

It's a real mind trip, too.

That was an easy 50 bucks.

I thought I'd have to come here and have snacks or something.

Well, instead, I'm just here exposing myself on television.

I don't know what's worse.

Oh, well.

You're going to paint me on the camera.

What? What's that?

Why are you recording that? That is so demeaning.

It's not easy being dirty, white, and sweet.

Oh, thank you very much.

I don't have any place to put this right now that would be decent.

The letter is warm.

There's no better friend to Walker than U.S. Grant and Ben Franklin.

No, $50 does not get my pants off.

Another day at the office.

Number three. Number four. Six.

I'm number nine. Twenty. Thirty. Forty. Number twenty-five. Thirty-seven. Oh, I

can't believe that I survived.

Fifty-eight. Seventy-five. Zero.

Sixty-nine.

And I'm number nine. And I'm number nine. Ninety-five.

And I'm number nine. Ninety-five. I can't believe that I survived.

I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I,

I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I,

My real name?

No.

Shannon Jones.

My name is Shannon Jones.

I'm 23.

My name is Bobby. I'm originally from L.A.

First time I made money for sex.

I'd have to say I was about 12.

I had a friend of mine that...

Lived across the street from me when I was younger, and I used to run with him

all the time. And I had sex with him.

Like, it was just me and him fooling around in a little garage, messing

around. And he always took me to the hamburger stands and stuff like that

when I was a kid.

And I always wanted to know how he had money.

And one day he took me to this guy's house. I was about 13 at the time, I

guess, then. And he introduced me, and I ended up having sex with him and been

doing it almost ever since.

And then I met this other guy that used to own a lawnmower shop, and I was with

him for like two years.

And he was a real sweetheart. He took very good care of me when I was a kid,

and my mom let me stay with him through the summer, and he always took me on

trips. My mom didn't know that I was getting fucked by him or nothing like

that. She thought mostly that I was just there working at his shop or something

like that.

But after a while, when I turned like 15, that's when she really truly found

out what I was really doing.

To really be honest, you're going to laugh, but I like fat men.

Older, chunky men that are bigger and a little bit of hair.

They're just, they're really sweet. I mean, there's people that are, that get

time, take time to know you instead of just wanting a piece of meat.

My parents took me when I was like 13, 9, 10 years old. 7 years old. I was 13.

I was at Seward and Santa Monica.

15. 16 years old. I was probably 18 years old.

Because they like little boys.

Johns love it when you're that young.

Yeah. All the pedophiles come out of the woodwork.

Top rigs number 48.

Good.

I don't feel guilty at all right now about it.

The first time I turned a trick was when I ran away from home when I was 12 years

old.

It's naturally not that great to fuck somebody who's old enough to be your

grandfather, but, you know, that's 15 minutes out of your day.

Some great things came out of being on the street. Like, I can size somebody up

in about three seconds.

And, you know, I know that I got that from jumping into cars with strangers,

and you had to size up where they were going to cut your throat, arrest you, or

just blow you, you know, in about two minutes. You had about two minutes to do

it. The bad part about the boulevard is it's got a very short lifespan, and

there's a black hole that swallows you eventually.

Take that call. It's my John. Hold on.

Hello.

To my knowledge, I'm the only one who got out from that time period.

So... I'm the lucky one.

I didn't even know what pulling a chick was.

And I already pulled a chick.

Just had them.

I was at a bus stop, and I got picked up.

He said he would pay me $60, so I got in the car.

It was through an escort agency.

The guy just wanted me to give him a connectable job.

He was mad because I had a goatee. He asked me to sit on his chest and just

jerk off for him. I think he fucked my dick or something.

Fuck, fuck.

I looked at the magazines and... Thought about all the girls I wanted to do. It

was pretty boring.

A bottle of champagne.

Bam. For ten minutes, just shutting my eyes and dealing with it.

And 50 bucks.

Boom. You know what I mean? The money's there. It's easy.

I can't remember the details.

It's vague.

I've known I was gay from the time I was old enough to walk. I was always a thug.

Born a non-breeder.

I didn't really realize that being gay was different.

Yes, I'm a very happy homosexual.

Played with Barbie dolls when I was growing up. I denied it for a while.

I was attracted to schoolmates that were boys.

I love to be homosexual. I love to have men around me. I'm a homosexual.

I can't imagine being straight and sticking my neck in somebody's ass. I

just can't.

I don't get fucked up the ass. I don't fuck nobody up the ass.

That's some suck on my fucking cock, okay?

And that's what I get paid for, and paid fucking well.

My name's Brett Michael Coon.

I got my nickname, Brett the Brat.

Not that I'm a brat, but because they think I'm like 21 years old, you know?

Don't be too butch.

What the people don't understand is that it is so goddamn fucking easy.

And you're the star.

Everybody loves you. Everybody wants to talk to you. Oh, Brett.

Oh, my big buddy Brett. Little Brett the brat.

Here, you know, here's $50. Hopefully I see you later tonight. Here's this.

Here's that. You want a cocktail?

You want new shoes? You want this? Come on. My God, you know.

It's almost so ridiculous.

You know, a 60-year-old male may have lost his wife.

Homosexual tendencies came upon.

Sitting at a bar at 6 in the morning.

Um, lonely as all hell. What do you think they want to hear? They want to

hear that they're special, they're a nice person.

Um, I like you, you're so nice.

Um, yeah, smile, give them a dimple.

They don't want to think about, um...

The old lovers they have that died of AIDS. They don't want to hear about the

wife that took off with some guy named Julio down in fucking Barbados. You know

what I mean? They don't want to hear about that shit. They want to hear that

they're the special one now and you love them and that's what you tell them.

And they know it's a crack of shit. I know it's a crack of shit. You know it's

a crack of shit. You know it's a crack of shit. But, you know.

You see, really what I do is I'm an actor.

I'm being paid to play a part, you know, and play it well and play it

convincingly. Some people just like a certain type of guy and they try to play

that role.

And every guy, I guess, takes on his own role.

I've even created people, literally characters.

Played cowboy, played mother, played father, whatever.

With some I'm a top leather man, with some I'm a young blonde go-go boy. Some

guys walk the boulevard in suits and tuxedos.

It's weird, you know, I call it theme.

Anything I think you want to hear, I'm going to tell it to you. Getting turned

on is part of acting. That's what I do. I sell dreams.

I'm sure every actor or actress in Hollywood is not turned on by the person

that they're making a movie with, but they're getting paid. It's called

acting.

What's my thing?

That young California skateboarder look, I guess. I don't know. I mean, I don't

really... I'm just me.

Today, you gotta be real. My name is Morris Tyrone Fulton.

I'm 33 years old, and I'm still making money off my body.

A lot of people need to learn how to dress, though.

Why would you want to walk down Santa Monica Boulevard with biker shorts on?

I dress like I'm a businessman because that's what you are. You're dealing with

a public.

Don't conduct it like a child. You conduct it like a child, people will

treat you like one. Then you won't make no money.

I mean, don't get me wrong. I mean, anybody that's working in Santa Monica,

you know, shouldn't be out there. But sometimes a man's got to do what a man's

got to do. I don't knock a man from doing what he does.

If you're out there to take care of your family, then so be it.

I mean, I'm married, two kids.

She's like, you know, you do what you have to do. I'm not mad at you.

Just don't bring me no disease.

You know?

She's open-minded.

I come home, first thing I want to do is take a shower, and Ronald's on the couch

and watch BET.

Fun thing to do.

You know, I watch the kids play, and that's it.

You know, I play with the dogs and call it a day.

Gay to me is, are you happy?

If you ask me that question, I would say no.

I like men and women.

Yeah, I'm straight.

I am straight.

I don't know if you call me gay. I like queens.

I don't know. Most husbands I think are straight.

I'm not homosexual.

I'm not bisexual.

I'm not even heterosexual.

Let's just put it this way. I'm sexual.

No, I'm bisexual.

I like everybody.

They buy, I get sexual.

If I was gay, I might as well just go out there and do it for nothing.

I perform in homosexual activities

and...

That's all I'd say to that, too.

I'm a little nervous.

Don't worry about it. It's really laid back.

I stopped, uh...

gangbanging and I started working the boulevard.

Being a gang member was fun for a little while, you know, but

after getting shot at and doing all kinds of PCP and

just it was crazy, you know.

But that's all right. I am who I am now, you know. I know that I'm gay.

I'm bisexual.

Life as a hustler in Santa Monica is more peaceful than life as a gang

member.

Plus, I don't run into the police as much as I did as a gang member now as a

hustler, even though the police do put me over just about every night.

That's why I drink a lot, you know. I drink a lot because it keeps me level

and stuff so I can do what I'm doing.

And plus, it puts a roof over my head, you know. I get my hotel room every

night.

And it's been a little rough because a lot of my homeboys don't agree with what

I do. So I have to get into fights sometimes.

I just got into a fight the other day. I got stitches on my chin.

I like what I do on the boulevard. I like the scenery. I like the scene, you

know. The scene's cool, you know. It's live.

And I love what I do. I love that.

And I'm comfortable with being.

So I have no problem with being touched.

It's never a dull moment.

I like sex.

I don't do it because I have to. I do it because I want to. I like sex.

As a nymphomaniac, I love to have sex.

Some people like to do cocaine.

You know, some people like to drink.

Some people like to drive fast cars, you know.

I like to have sex.

Going on a cruise and going to a picnic is fun, but it's

good cleaning fun.

Some people like that good dirty fun sometimes.

They want to just feel, you know, sleazy.

turning tricks, it wouldn't work for me, and as well, I don't think it would work

for them. I don't buy into the whole trip about, well, I don't have to pay

for sex. Well, you know, I don't have to pay for sex either, but fact remains,

the best sex I ever had, I paid for it.

I got picked up by a guy, muscle body, I mean, dark tan, blonde hair, incredible,

absolutely incredible.

And before I knew it, I was in the truck, and he's like, well, I'm working

on this construction site in the hills.

So we drive up into Hollywood Hills, and he was looking for someone to go down on

him, you know, and being as attracted as I was to him, I didn't hesitate at

complying with what it was that he was after, and I'll never forget it. Never,

ever.

Never, ever, ever.

And he was married, I suppose, too, which made it even more incredible.

I think his final words were,

Damn, my wife doesn't do that good.

What do I think is the best part of my body?

Oh, you tell me.

My eyes. My chest.

All of me.

Everything's sexy on my body. I get a lot of opinions that I look good. When I

walk down the street, people just look at me.

I would have to say my dick. My butt. My dick. My butt. My dick. My ass. My

foreskin. I know it's a definite delicacy.

They'll ask me, well, can you make it jump? And I do. I got a six-pack. I can

expand the head of my dick. It's a good package. I mean, I'm happy with what I

have.

Hey, Tommy Cruz.

That's not like where they answer my stage name.

I have an agent, and he thought that I resembled...

Tom Cruise and I hated it. I wanted to be known for me not for my

similarity to somebody else, but I guess it's all about money. My mother told me

sitting on my ass I wasn't gonna make no money so I thought I'd just roll over

and use my ass to make some money.

And I did!

Now this is my money maker.

This is what makes all the money right there.

People think it's attractive, they like it because it's smooth and youthful, and

they use the term bubble butt. Until this day, I have yet to figure out what

bubble butt means.

I assume it's something positive because everyone loves it.

See this scar right here?

There's a story to this scar.

Never, ever cook bacon in the nude.

That is a lesson.

Once my face wears out, once my ass starts to sag, you know, hey, I'm out of

the business. I ain't gonna make no more money.

So you gotta think like that. You gotta always think ahead.

You can't retire in this business. This business is immediate funds while you're

young.

I'm not racist when it comes to money, partner. I don't ever do it for free.

It depends.

It could be $200 a week, it could be $4,000 a month.

You know this guy ain't got a cheap old car, and he ain't got no money, he ain't

gonna make much.

A hundredth to two hundredth to three hundredth. A real good night, I could

make maybe anywhere from $700 to $800.

Anywhere between $300 and $400 a week.

I would charge like $20 an inch, and I'd say I'm about 8.5 inches, so that's

about $175.

Generally, prices run between $50 and $60 no matter what you do. You treat

yourself like a $100 hooker, and they're going to come at you with $100.

That's why I make $150, $200, $300, $400 a trick, not $20. A lot of guys will

come up to me and just say straight up, I want to get some head for $20. Okay.

Watch your car, and I'm going to give you $20 worth.

When the people pay me more, I come. A lot of guys will go and get totally

screwed and all the way up and down for $20.

And I think that's horrible.

It's awesome.

It is.

Some people just don't want to do anything.

They don't want to work. They don't want to get a job. They don't want to do

nothing. All they want to do is hustle.

Very few people like us.

It's a hard way of living.

I'm going to get to lay down.

I'm damn tired.

And people love to be hustled.

You know why?

It's a thing about them. They just love it.

Gimme, gimme, give, give.

Gimme, gimme, give.

That's all it is.

Thank you. It's mine, it's mine, it's mine. It's mine. It's all mine.

My name's Scott Noonan.

I'm 22 years old. I'm from Atlanta, Georgia.

I came to Los Angeles probably just because of Hollywood, you know, where

people come to be movie stars.

And things turned out different.

I hustle people out of their money. I try not to have sex with them.

I'd rather scam them out of their money, have them give me their money.

And that's usually how I get it.

Thank you.

I never feel bad or dishonest about it. I don't steal anything from people. I

talk them into giving it to me.

And I usually get what I want because I got a pretty good, you know, honest face

and everything. And I can talk people into anything pretty much. And I'm

pretty successful. I have my own apartment.

You know, I wear nice clothes. I buy whatever I want to buy.

And the more money I make, the more I want.

I never satisfy with money.

Never. I never have enough.

I'm really greedy.

When I was younger, before I got into hustling, I got some tattoos.

And I really regret them now because I sell my body.

I try not to let people see them. But most of the people that see them, they

don't mind because they like me for my personality is what they say. But I

don't believe that shit.

It's bullshit.

I mean, if they liked me for my personality, they wouldn't be trying to

suck my dick or something, you know?

So you're going to take that off, right?

You don't want me to do that.

Why? I'm on hormones.

breath. I'm in the process of transforming over to a transsexual or

into a woman actually.

Oh Lord, I feel like I'm doing a porno.

I don't wear dresses or pumps or nothing like that as far as what you see on the

street.

Mine is just a regular gear and I get picked up like that.

And when I came to Hollywood, we used to pull routines to where we didn't want to

give up sex for money, so what we'd do is we'd rip off some of the drag queens

when they'd come out of the date's car and beat them up for their money.

Or we would take a man and hide two of us. One would lure a man to our hotel

room. We would all stay together.

And some of us would hide in the closet in the bathroom and rob him as soon as

he came in there.

Yes, I have a boyfriend.

We're both in the same line of work.

We live together.

My lover, he's more feminine than I am.

He's a good person. He cooks, cleans for me, takes care of me.

Actually,

we're...

not comfortable with the situation. It's kind of hard because we're both a little

selfish, you know, wanting each other for just ourselves.

We don't get into anything too wild or crazy or anything. I might spank on my

hand or something.

I like to rim them.

I like to fuck them.

That's basically it.

That's basically it.

We set goals to where we're saving enough money to where we can get out of

this line of work and get us some honest jobs.

So we can live amongst just with each other and not feel like we're out there

somewhat cheating on each other.

I love him because he just takes care of me, I guess. And I never had anybody

there, you know, to really take care of me. And it feels good to go to sleep

with someone every night and wake up and they're still there in the morning, you

know. And that's something money can't buy.

I just want to be loved.

What's love got to do with it?

That's a good question.

I just have myself.

Love to me is more of a state of mind.

Yes, I would like to be with somebody.

I wasn't born with it. I'm not going to die with it. So it doesn't really make a

damn whether I have it right now or later or what have you.

Love is a four-letter word.

So it ain't.

When you're a hustler, you can't fall in love.

Scott, 99.

I'm happy being a hustler. I hope. I'm not ashamed of what I am. You know, if

it says occupation, if I'm filling out an application, male prostitute.

Where you work, Santa Monica Boulevard. We're at all the corners.

You know, I like walking with my shirt off when it's sunny and going to work

out and get all tightened and hit the boulevard.

And watch all the cars circle me.

Yeah. The intention.

Now, you know, I'm seeking attention like a kid.

But I get paid for my attention if you pick me up.

Because it be on the clock then.

See, even showing them a hoe.

You can't turn a hoe into a housewife.

You can't turn a male prostitute into a husband.

You know what I'm saying? He's not going to be. He's always going to be a hoe.

Always. I'll probably be a whore till I'm 76 years old.

Forever.

And there's nothing wrong with it.

My real name's David.

I go by Nathan everywhere.

Have for three years.

I don't really have any friends.

I mean, besides customers.

The only people you can really date are other hustlers, and most of the other

hustlers, you can't trust them.

I mean, they'll steal from you or rob from you or do whatever they have to to

get ahead.

And anybody that's not a hustler doesn't want to talk to you because you're a

hustler. Do you have a lover now?

Yeah.

We got into speed, and speed kind of changes people.

It makes it so it's the most important thing in the world.

And so he went for someone that could give him more speed.

That just happened like two weeks ago.

We were together for about four and a half years.

I mean, so if I go on the street and I'm upset, it doesn't matter. No one's going

to hire you.

They want someone that's happy.

You know, ready for sex.

That's what they want.

What's my client say? As soon as I get over my boyfriend, then they'll come and

see me again.

But they want him to talk to me until I get over him.

Which means basically I don't make any money or anything.

Do you sometimes think you're in the wrong business?

Every day.

I try to get a job, but nobody will hire me.

You don't plan for much of the future.

I mean, I've almost been killed probably four or five times, so you really don't

know if you're even going to live.

I mean, I hope I make it to 30.

You're going to be okay?

Cross your fingers.

Thank you.

My name is John.

Last night, the funniest thing happened.

Someone that I've known for like 12 years, 13 years.

It's always been, hi, how are you and what's going on?

And he ended up in my bed last night.

And it was just really good to be next to somebody.

He didn't even notice me.

It's like they weren't even there.

It's scary, you know? I don't blame people for being afraid, but

it's really hard to tell people, no, it's not HIV, it's

neurofibromatosis, and the first thing they think is, can I catch this?

Am I going to wake up with all these tumors on my body?

I think quite a few people walk out the door because of it.

I slept like a baby. I woke up this morning and, you know, I don't usually

fix anybody breakfast.

That's just something I don't do.

I don't even eat breakfast.

But I cooked him breakfast and I had breakfast.

And coffee.

Sounds like a line out of a movie, but it's true.

Everybody is somebody's type. What turns me on sexually?

Am I?

White boys.

Let me get some water.

Pretty much anything as long as the price range is right.

I like femininity.

There's a woman in the room. I like a guy with a nice big dick, like Dirty

Todd. But I like older men.

I like bright.

I don't care about immaturity.

They're like good wives.

Spandex is cool.

Nasty, fun, creepy sex.

Because it doesn't bind, you know what I mean?

Flicky ass.

getting in there and i don't know oh yeah men with pretty asses ass i

like to fuck asses and that's my thing you know like especially like if they're

a little sweaty or something you know and uh um you know like the smell that

i don't know it just drives me crazy call me the ass man though i like

someone when they touch me on my knees and i could just come i've got a thing

for like

Being out in the mountains and doing it in the wilderness or something.

Sounds wild.

The LAPD, they turn me off.

A little fat is okay, but a lot of fat can be really hard for me to deal with.

Old people that treat you like a piece of meat.

I won't do multiple partners.

Drag queens.

Turn me off.

I won't get fucked.

I won't get fucked.

And I don't like sucking dick. I'm sorry I think of it that my back end is for

exit only.

My name is Dominic J.

Shuffalino III.

I am so, so intelligent, okay,

that I don't understand why I'm at this position in my life where I have to do

this.

Give me my money.

Give me my money, you wild boy. I was brought up in an upper-class family, and

I am a very, very picky person about what I do.

I had one guy. He told me to go to the bathroom, and he told me not to wipe.

And I was like,

you better repay me some damn good money for this.

He's like, okay, I'll give you $500. I'm like, okay, let's go.

And he sat there.

Did not touch my rear end or anything, just sat there smelling it, and he got

off to it.

Nobody touches my hair.

Nobody.

Won't happen.

Let me put it this way. When my hair is dry and washed and conditioned,

It feels like silk or satin.

But nobody else knows that because nobody touches my hair.

I am a complete J.A. when it comes to my hair.

I would rather have someone touch my weenie than touch my hair.

I mean, some people enjoy people playing with their hair.

I don't because I love my hair.

And I try to take care of it as much as I possibly can.

Which, in my residential position right now, at this current time,

is not very easy.

I've been on the streets for about a month, slept in a cardboard bar.

And I like sleep by the freeway.

It's cold sometimes.

I kind of enjoy it. It allows me to be free. You know, I feel free.

Okay, like the freeway is like right here.

And the ground is like up right here. And like all you hear is all night long.

The only bad part about it is when it rains.

Because, you know, then you're kind of wet.

So...

No,

no, I was doing like this.

Can you hear that?

I'm sorry.

I just did that to be funny.

I'm sorry.

Well, my name's Bo.

I lost my apartment about a month and a half ago because my

roommate went to jail and I couldn't keep up the rent.

I've slept on the roof of an apartment building.

Excuse me.

You know, I've slept up there before, but I had my blankets up there. I had a

pillow.

I didn't have a mattress.

I'd double up a couple of pieces of cardboard and I'd sleep on that.

At least I wasn't sleeping on the shingles.

I'd been uncomfortable.

You know.

Sometimes I feel ashamed of myself because, you know, when you're hustling

and you do a date, sometimes it might be someone that's real big or don't have

much for a look or just nasty, don't know what they're doing. And sometimes

you have the times where you enjoy it.

You really get into it because it's someone that you feel attracted to.

I ain't got much family left.

This past Monday made two weeks ago that my mother died.

You know?

She died on a Monday and I didn't find out until Thursday.

She'd already been cremated by the time I found out.

So, as far as that goes, I figure my mother's in heaven above and she's an

angel looking over me now and she already knows what I do.

That's the only one I was always worried about, finding out I was bisexual and

finding out what I do.

But my mother's gone now.

And I know she's seen everything I do anyways.

And I'm sure even if I would have told my mother that she would have accepted

me for who I am because she loved me like that.

My mother was a wonderful woman.

And I got the heart there with mom in it and I did this myself a bit of homemade

tattoo gun

Hmm

what if my parents saw this I mean I kind of thought about that yesterday and

I thought well if they're gonna i mean if they're even watching something like

this to begin with then i don't really have much to worry about and it's hard

enough i think for parents to think that the kids are sexual at all much less

homosexual and much less you know doing it for money they would never think in a

million years that i'd ever even conceive of doing something like this

it's probably she'll eventually find out or i'll tell her or something like that

when she's on her deathbed and she can't smack me or something no my mom suspect

but suspecting and knowing are two different things no my parents don't

know that i escort they think i work for a cable company now if they saw this

clip they would totally be shocked they'd probably have a heart attack my

dad thinks i need to repent god forgive me if they they did croak and they saw

this i wouldn't mind if they saw it actually it might

open up their eyes you know that they uh

They disowned me when I was very young because of me wanting to live my life.

I was with my father. He's in the military.

And we were watching the news one night, and they had the Gay Pride

March on TV.

He looked at the TV, looked at me, looked back at the TV, looked at me.

You know, said, you know, all those faggots ought to be shot.

And I just, I got upset. I got outraged.

And I told him, I said, you ever say that around me again, and, you know,

I'll wipe your ass all over the floor.

And this man scared me.

And I just, I couldn't believe I had said that to him.

Went to school, and I came back home, and all my bags were on the front porch

packed.

My name is Dustin C.

I'm 23 years old. I'm originally from Chicago, Illinois.

Well, my father died when I was three.

And I had a rough life with my mother.

She was a heroin addict.

And I was almost nine years old. I remember the last day with her.

She was sitting there shooting heroin in front of me. She OD'd right in front of

me and died.

And I just watched her for a while.

And I couldn't really understand.

And then it just finally dawned on me. I tried to wake her up, wake her up.

And then I went and got my next-door neighbor. Next-door neighbor came in and

felt her pulse.

And she was dead.

And she told me that she was dead. And I was like... I

started crying.

I don't know what it was like.

I was so hysterical that I just stayed there like that for a couple hours,

staring at the wall, crying. I just couldn't move.

I don't know.

There's actually more than that. It's feeling something in my mind. It's just

like part of my soul floating away.

And, I don't know, it's a bad feeling, you know.

Any kid sees their mother die.

Do I get lonely?

There were times I got so lonely that I felt like killing myself until

I met my lover.

She was a queen. Her name's Cassandra.

When I first saw her, I was in love at first sight.

My hands were shaking. I was like, it was so interesting. When we kissed each

other, tingles ran all through her body.

I knew I was in love.

Yesterday, I heard there were a few people. She broke up with me.

I hope not, you know, because she was the love of my life.

And she breaks up with me. That would basically be my whole life.

My name's Daniel Hill, and people call me Cowboy.

Pretty much an all-out cowboy, hustler.

I got you. Thank you.

I was molested at five years old, okay?

And it's kind of a fucked-up thing because I didn't tell my mom about it,

and I was about 15, and he says, well, son, I hope you still know I love you.

I was like, you know what, motherfucker?

I ought to kick your ass right now because what you did to me is still in

my mind.

I still see spikes in my eyes going towards your heart.

Okay?

And I see kids on TV getting molested. I see kids getting kidnapped.

I want to shoot the TV.

I want to break the motherfucker and find some bitch who did it to those

kids. Because that had to happen to me.

And it's not a funny thing.

And I'm expressing myself a little bit right now and just pulling that valve a

little bit.

And it really sucks.

The things I want to do is get fucked.

Because that will automatically...

Trigger the switch. I'm going after you, dude. In your mind.

The first time I got into S&M, type thing, weird stuff,

a guy wanted me to whoop him with a whip, right?

I started to whip.

I said, hey, okay.

Bang, bang, bang. I figured this guy liked to be teased.

He said, you ain't doing it right. You're not the right type.

I said, what?

What the fuck do you mean I'm not the right type?

Wham, wham.

I just gave it to him, man.

Just fucking lashed right on him, dude.

And he loved it.

And it's not supposed to love you. It's supposed to hate it. And I'm supposed to

like it. And you're not liking it. So bam, bam, bam. What are you doing to me?

Don't fucking use me.

You know?

And I pretty much almost opened up that little valve I was talking about, the

compressor. Almost opened up the valve. I said, no, Dan, hold yourself back. You

better calm down.

Dude.

And so I just pissed on him and gave him a hundred bucks. And I went home.

I love shit like that, you know? I love water sports.

When I first heard that, I thought they meant skiing.

I was like, yeah, I like water sports.

And he says, you ever do golden showers?

I was like, golden showers?

I said, what's a golden shower? And then I'm like, you want me to do what?

There's a lot of people out there that like to be degraded like that. Some guy

offered me a beer, and I said, thanks. And he bought me another beer.

I said, damn, thanks. And then he wanted to drink a glass of my piss.

And he was jagging off. He said, can you go to the bathroom? I said, yeah, I can

take a piss. Sometimes they're like inside of your mouth. Sometimes it's

just the face or just the body.

It kind of varies.

Got up.

All over his chest and up part of his neck.

People who are richer like to get peed on more than people who don't have

money. It's pretty normal, though, you know, this line of work.

So I told him to buy me another beer, and I gave him another glass, you know.

Let's see. I dropped out, or no, actually I was kicked out of high school

when I was only 15 years old for threatening to kill a PE coach.

What turns me on? Pain.

I love pain.

I came to realize at an older age, you know, how much I really... didn't enjoy

when my stepfather used to beat me.

And I would purposely do, I would purposely misbehave and do things to

piss him off just so I could get him to spank me.

I like when people put cigarettes out of my nipples.

You know, I think that's hot.

Um, I'm sorry, what were you saying?

And when I'm getting spanked, you know, I don't want anybody to be a pansy out.

You know, I hate it when I go and I'm like, okay, spank me.

And they're like, you know, they give me a little pat on the ass and I'm like,

oh, that didn't hurt you. And I'm like, I don't think this is going to work out,

you know.

You know, I mean, I think sex is still boring. I've tried to weed out all the

people that are just into, like, basic sex, you know. I like the fetish freaks.

is beautiful.

I'm not worried about anybody seeing this. In fact, I hope everybody that I

went to high school with sees this, especially the teacher that I promised

to kill.

I can remember one of the hottest dates I was on. This guy picked me up, and he

wanted to be beat.

He didn't want me to take my clothes off. He didn't want me to suck his dick

or fuck him. He just wanted me to beat the shit out of him.

This guy wanted me to break his rib.

He wanted me to keep hitting him.

Well, I hadn't meant to over-fuck him.

And he told me, he said, I want you to count how many times you hit me.

And on the hundredth time that you hit me, I'm going to come.

He started telling me to hit him harder and harder and harder.

And finally I just hit him hard enough, I guess.

I felt it break and I felt it come.

So I knew it was up.

Sure enough.

And as I counted it a hundred times, he came all over the place.

I thought it was pretty unbelievable.

I thought that was pretty hot, too.

My name is Van.

I'm 30 years old, and I'm from Japan.

I'm an artist. I'm a performance artist.

I'm hired for people to fulfill their fantasies, their deep, dark fantasies.

I was going to be a movie star, you know, with modeling and acting.

Small parts, you know, I decided, you know, I had enough.

Then I get into escort work.

The clientele requested a lot of fetishes.

So I just decided to go, you know, full master and change

my whole entire house into a dungeon, dungeon master, you know, with a full

dungeon in my house.

And it's going really well.

Sifting is $300, and usually the guy is pretty much high on popper

to really get relaxed.

And I have this long latex glove that goes all the way up to my armpit.

And then I put on a surgical latex glove just up to my wrist and

just lube it up. And it's a long process, you know, to get your whole.

get your whole arm up there but uh it's an intense feeling for the other person

i think for myself too it's um you go in places that uh even though it's physical

with your hand but for some reason it's it's also more emotional it's more

psychological too and we both you know reach the same place it's really strange

at the same time um and i found session like that i get really exhausted at the

end

The weirdest thing was putting a rubber hose on their penis.

Well, he just asked me to cut some of my stupid carrots.

While he played with himself, I dug my feet into his rib cage, up underneath

his rib cage, and he wanted me to spit on him and put my feet in his face. But

I was fisting this guy, and all of a sudden, it just, like, exploded.

Well, you may want to edit this out.

And I've got really good composure in situations like that. And I was just

really calm. It's like, let's get some towels and clean up.

He wanted to eat my shit.

Yeah, I have a priest I see regularly.

It's his thing.

And he even has this chair specifically designed for this.

He likes to be beaten up. And I spanked him before. He likes to be humiliated.

He likes to eat my butt.

He made an appointment for me when I was ready to have a movement.

He likes to eat my cum.

He likes to be verbally abused.

And he laid on the floor underneath and he ate my shit. He said sometimes when

guys find out he's a priest that they can't beat him up, they can't spank him,

they don't want to hurt him. And I went through that too. I'm like, I can't do

this too. But I got over it.

I was actually thinking, I was looking down at this guy and just thinking,

where were you raised or what got into you or how

did you get to like this? How did this become a turn on for you?

And I didn't want to think about it too much longer after that, so.

So are you doing this interview so you can get money to buy crack?

Yeah.

Are you high right now?

I'm not low.

Speed and alcohol were my best friends.

Alcohol has been my best friend for 22 years now.

Speed, heroin.

Ecstasy, weed.

Allegedly, I do speed.

Okay. Because I do half a gram of speed, my dick gets hard like this bottle. You

know, it starts leaking pre-cum and shit. You know, I'm fucking like out

there in space and all I want to do is fuck for 12 hours.

Speed enables you, so you think, to keep up with the streets and not have to

sleep, not have to eat.

I've been up for five days. No sleep.

I live like 73-hour days.

Compared to year 12.

You don't need no food or water or nothing, just sex.

A lot of hustlers spend all their money back into Crystal.

You know, it's kind of a big circle. It's never going anywhere.

Yep.

My name is Frank McGinnis, and I'm 35 years old.

I always shoot at Crystal.

That's my choice. I don't like starting it or anything else.

It makes me a little worried. I do get a little worried about it.

I'm more concerned, believe it or not, about seeing people on the street than

myself. I can't see myself in their same, you know what I mean? For some

reason, I look at them, and I don't see myself as being them, even though I know

I'm exactly where they are.

I taught myself I would never crystal again if I lost one of my teeth or

whatever, because it's real common with people losing their teeth.

Half of my tooth fell out once, and I didn't care.

You know, I can go from one bar to the next without a place to live, night to

night,

with a dime in my pocket most of the time, and live that way.

And in between that, go to A-means, you know, and try to get out of it.

I played in a tennis tournament, was seeded second in this tournament.

In the middle of the night, I had to go out and get drugs.

I could barely, you know, walk the next day.

You know, forfeit a lot of things.

Remember that song from Sheryl Crow?

All I want to do is have fun.

That was like my theme song for so long.

You know, all I want is fun. But my friends used to say, are you still

having fun?

You know what I mean? And I'd say, well, I'm trapped.

No, you're not. You can get out of it.

I do feel trapped.

And it's not even a trap. Before it was a trap I didn't want to be in.

Now it's a trap that I don't really care anymore.

You know, you get to that point where you just don't really care.

Well,

my real name is not Ashley.

I go by Chad, my grandmother nicknamed me Chad because she hated the name

Hubert.

And so did I, so Chad stuck with me through kindergarten on up.

I am now 32.

I guess I'm holding my age up fairly well, considering the hell I've been

through.

I've been...

Brutalized. Gay bashing three times.

I've had eggs tossed at me.

My lover of seven and a half years that just passed away in May.

He died of AIDS.

He used to overly abuse me.

And physically.

pick me up and throw me across the room.

So I learned to fight like a man.

When my lover died in May, I swore that I'd never pick up a needle again.

I hadn't until last night.

And I ended up shooting for the first

time since.

My lover died.

I feel real guilty

because I broke a promise that I made to him on his

deathbed.

I even feel more guilty because I have his ashes sitting in a

cremation urn in my storage.

I can't bear to sprinkle them to the ocean like he wanted done.

You're going to be okay?

Just a little emotional.

It's come down from the drugs.

But see, this is not going for drugs.

This has to go for a debt that I owe to

keep from losing everything I own in storage, basically.

I have to pay more money to them.

I don't want to grow up.

To be able to live a full life. When I grow up. That's a good question.

I'm not going to grow up.

So, in other words, what you're telling me is that you really don't think I'm a

grown-up. I produce that music.

I've always wanted to sing.

You find me a nice little sugar daddy.

I just want to be happy.

I think I'm cute enough for it. I want to be happy.

You know, 2.3 adoptive kids, whatever.

Become a world-renowned chef or something like that. I love to cook.

That's my hobby.

I actually came here to become a tattoo artist.

Well, now I want to write about the sex industry.

Baseball player.

Get back on my basketball court.

I'm not going to be anything when I grow up. I'm already grown up.

It's like the vampire bat coming out at night and feeding on cattle.

When the vampire bat bites,

It has a secretion that kind of is a painkiller, and it kind of gives the cow

a little bit of euphoria.

So while the bat's feeding, the cow doesn't chase it away and knock it away

from feeding so it can go ahead and feed. It doesn't feed enough to kill it,

so it doesn't bleed the cow to death.

But every time that vampire bat comes back, it brings a few maybe germs and a

few of this and a few of that, and the sore starts getting festered, and it

starts sending blood poisoning through the cow.

Eventually the cow dies, not so much from the wound, but from the side

effects of all the things going on outside of it.

Prostitution is the same kind of thing.

At the beginning it's an ego trip. My God, he gave me $400 just to go here and

do this.

Wow, I must be something if someone's willing to pay that kind of cash.

Then it develops into, well, you know what, I need money.

Because now that I've gotten this kind of money for doing this, I get used to

doing it and getting used to having the money. So you start spending it and

doing crazy things, and then you start doing dope to deal with the fact that

you're now using intimacy as a commodity.

You've got these naive kids going out there, finding this wonderful way of

making money, and these tricks prey upon that.

They're not bad people. I mean, just like the vampire bat in and of itself is

not a bad thing.

It's just surviving.

But the whole situation ends up so that the kids get eaten away, eaten away,

eaten away, and their insides gone after a few years.

No hustler can live forever unless he's Dorian Gray.

I'm getting too old for this.

I don't want to hustle too much longer.

I don't think I'll do it until 30.

That's the deadline.

You know, I'm not going to retire on this. I don't want to become an asshole,

and I'm becoming an asshole.

I should plan ahead, but I don't know.

I'm not talking to the camera on this one. I'm talking to you. Do you

understand what I'm saying?

I don't. I'm not an asshole. I don't want to become an asshole, but I am.

I'm kind of sick of it and I just want to go home.

I'm going to go get on a bus tomorrow morning and go home to mom.

I'm just tired of it all for a while, you know.

I guess it's like smoking a cigarette.

You don't know when you're going to stop.

I moved to Los Angeles to pursue my career as a writer.

A lot of people don't put it together that someone who's an escort has any

kind of intellect, which is wrong.

Sometimes I feel like strangling people that they don't understand or that they

don't see the hundreds of other ways that they prostitute themselves, but

they don't unzip their pants or whatever, right?

I love the idea of someone paying me because they...

find me hot or, you know, because they want my body, that really turns me on.

And every time I get in a situation where I'm meeting an older gentleman,

they start presuming that I have some kind of a broken background and that I

need to be saved and that they're the person who could save me from this, you

know, horrible lifestyle of being a cowboy, which is also...

It's ironic to me that they call cowboys all the time, yet

don't have any respect for those of us who are making a living as an

escort. And so I think the problem is they come off as not needing to be

saved, and they don't like that. I think they want to save somebody.

I just think that's the biggest lie and myth about this war.

I really try to be a very conscientious whore.

I swear, I have a lot of clients who say, you're a good whore.

I remember one guy, he called me up, and very wealthy guy, living out in the

hills. I got to his house, and he wanted me to strip naked, so I did. Then he

gave me a massage.

Then he wanted to give me a sponge bath.

And then he spent about an hour talking to me about this great experience he had

at a Phil Collins concert.

And then he said, bye.

You know, that's what he needed.

That's what he needed.

It's ultimately, ultimately, it's always about human contact.

And ideally, I would like to be able to, with everyone I meet, to be like my

lover, to be like that open and that flowing.

Why do we put a positive value on restricting our ability to share

intimacy with people?

Why is that better than being able to share freely with more people?

Sex is good.

Sex is wonderful.

Sex is one of the best things about being alive, I figure.

Most people's experience of this transcendence is...

The orgasm is this momentary thing, and then you let go, and then, oh, you get

yourself back together, and you're all guarded again, you know, immediately.

And for a lot of people, that includes a great deal of shame when you get your

non-orgasmic personality back.

I mean, when you think about the Catholic Church and all that, the priest

and all the prayers and all the sunlight coming in through the stained-glass

windows shining down, I mean...

I don't know about you, but I have been just really... I've been in church and

been really moved by that.

And the reason I understand that is because I've had orgasms.

That's what sex is. Sex is ecstasy.

I think that the planet and the... I think it's wonderful.

It's fabulous.

I mean, how can you look at a sunset or...

see the stars and not think god damn this is a wonderful planet you know i

mean don't you do that sometimes don't you like look at the sunset and go damn

that is fabulous who thought of this you know

Well, the most common misconception about people who get paid for sex is

that everyone doing it is kind of the same and we're all cut out of the same

mold. Jaded individuals.

Unintelligent. Dirty.

Thief or gypsy.

Immoral. Unworthy of being loved.

Like you're just trash.

Fuck them.

You want humiliating? You want degrading? Be a cater waiter.

It's kind of weird sometimes when I go to a party or some sort of event.

Oh, you're a hooker? You know, they talk to me like I should be ashamed.

Why do you do that?

Well, I don't know, but why do you buy it? And I have to stand there and feel

worthy. But they have this mindset when they're talking to me like I naturally

would be ashamed.

Because they would be ashamed if they did what I did.

So that's why they judge.

And, uh...

I'm not ashamed.

So therefore, I have to stand there and be strong because they wouldn't if they

were in my shoes.

Because they would be ashamed.

And I don't choose to be ashamed.

Does that make sense?

We're giving you three minutes.

Three minutes. The camera's on. You can say whatever you want. When you stand

up, we lose your head. Oh, do you?

Yeah.

Man, that was, that was alright.

It's hot.

Caliente, mucho caliente.

By the way, um, I really have never made any money for having sex.

But, um, I am a hustler because I just hustled you guys out of 50 bucks.

Suckers.

What the fuck?

I'm telling my personal story.

I don't know what to do.

Hi,

Mom.

I don't know. I feel kind of naked.

Because I'm looking at myself for the first time, I think. Well, not myself,

but... this aspect of my life for the first time.

And it's been, God, three to five years already.

I never thought about it.

Kind of sad, I think. I feel kind of sad right now. I don't know why.

Got me looking naked, stupid on this TV show.

Thousands of people.

I want some more money, okay?

I'm going to demonstrate for you.

Three positions for autofillet show.

I think they're gone.

Check this out. Hey, these people are crazy.

I ain't never seen others like this in my life.

These people are fucking wack. What is up

with this? People are smoked out.

This shit is crazy.