Original subtitles

Repeat after me.

I am more than my breakup. I am more than my breakup.

Today is my day. Today is my day.

I am lovable.

I can do it. I can do it.

I can do it. I can do it. I can do it. I can do it. Okay.

Oh, God.

I'm so tight.

Is this normal?

Oh.

There it is.

Are you sure you don't want to do anything for the big 3-0?

Dana, yes, for the last time, I am sure, okay? And you can stop saying the number

like I'm going to magically forget that I'm a geriatric.

Stop. Look, I know things have been hard since Brad left. Dana, he didn't just

leave.

I know, but I feel like you're better off without him.

And besides, I don't know how much longer I can be friends with Eeyore.

Oh, yeah, well, at least Eeyore's boyfriend didn't fuck every animal in

the Hundred Acre Woods.

It wasn't every animal.

It was a lot of them, okay? And I should have seen it coming.

Since he got that spray tan and braces.

Look, you'll find someone. What about that guy that always comes into the

shop?

Aiden? Mm-hmm. Are you...

insane if i think brad is out of my league aiden is like on a whole other

like actual planet oh shit we're late what work we gotta go are you kidding

dana i have to shower no there's no time come on no i'm gonna be like you know

what we have time for one picture to say we did it just one yeah come on

God. Dana!

Okay, don't let Melissa see.

She's still mad at you for being so late. What?

Why is she just mad at me?

I run a six-minute mile. I got here on time. Oh, my.

I love these. I know. They're moist.

Oh, my God.

Chris. Hey.

I'm sorry. Can you hear my back? Hi.

It's okay.

Oh, you're good.

Hi. Hi.

I got it. Oh.

Okay. All right.

Oops.

Oh, I'm sorry. Aiden, this is Dana.

Hi. It's nice to finally officially meet you. Oh, you have to stop.

I'm not. What are you doing?

Happy birthday.

Oh, thank you.

Saw it on Facebook.

You two are Facebook friends?

Yeah.

So you still use that? Yeah, just for, like, family stuff. Don't make it weird,

okay? Thank you, Aiden. Oh, my gosh, thank you so much. Yeah, I feel like I'm

saying thank you so much. So how did you two meet again? Dude, I don't remember.

Gay dodgeball and WeHo.

Lori, are you okay? I'm fine.

That's how you broke your nose? You told me you got mugged. Guess I don't know my

own strength.

I know.

Hey, my friend Ace is having a pool party later today.

You both should come. Oh, absolutely.

Oh. We can't. We can't because we have that really

important gala. Oh, no.

The gala.

The gala was canceled.

Yeah, I got a technical problem.

Great. I'll Facebook you the deed. Thank you. Awesome.

Bye.

He finally asked you out and you say no? No, he did not ask me out, okay? He

invited both of us to a gay pool party, okay? And secondly, he is so much hotter

up close. No, you've been out of the game way too long because he was totally

flirting with you. Was he? I wasn't sure. I just thought it was endorphins

from the muffin.

No, no, no. Nobody is Facebook friends unless they're trying to flirt.

Oh, shit.

Oh, God, I got to find a swimsuit. Oh, no, no, don't worry about it. I got you.

Melissa, I'm going to go take, like, a break or something. I'll be back later.

Bye. Okay, great. Whatever you want.

Melissa, whenever you're ready, I just have to use the bathroom.

Do something.

Work.

I would never eat a muffin.

Jesus.

Don't kill me.

I want shopping.

Pool party, bitches!

What do you want to do? What do you want to do?

What do you want to do? What do you want to do?

What do you want to do?

What do you want to do?

What do you want to do?

What do you want to do? What do you want to do? What do you want to do?

What do you

want

to do?

Take off your shirt.

Why?

It's a pool party.

Oh, yeah, no, I know. It's a pool party. What can I have?

Eden, come on. Get back in the pool.

Where'd he come from?

Sorry.

Gotta get back to the game.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, of course. Love the trunk.

Thank you.

See? Yeah, I heard him. He also has to get back to the game with his beautiful

way.

Don't worry about Speedo Boy. But I never know when it's going to end. So

I'm really focusing on growing my brand, you know, through my TikTok.

That's my baby.

My open. It's so good. Seriously, like iconic. Make everything you're in like a

thousand times better. But actually, where's the lie?

And what are you?

Sorry? Oh, me.

I'm just a barista.

Cute. Totally cute. So cute.

Yeah. And...

You enjoy doing that? I mean, yeah, I like it for the most part.

You know, sometimes the customers can be cunts.

So, yeah.

What kind of protein shakes have you been getting into lately?

Well, my whole brand is pee.

Whoa.

That's a lot.

Is it blending?

God, no. It feels like a mime.

It smells awful.

Why did you... What?

I wanted to keep my skin forcefully.

I don't know.

So, Abe liked your swimsuit?

Yeah, I guess.

You should go talk to him some more.

I don't know.

No, come on. That's the whole reason why we came.

Just for being nice. Dana.

I'm going to go pee.

Oh, okay.

Go pee.

What are you doing?

Are you going to pee?

No, like, I really have to pee. Oh, no, just go in here.

Dana, is that what you're doing?

So, Ace, what was that TikTok handle, boo?

Ace's heart LLC across all... Oh, my God, this house.

Chris? Brad?

Hi.

What are you doing here? I thought you hated parties.

Me? No.

I'm like a total party boy now. You know, people, they change.

Cool.

You look good.

Oh.

Well,

thank you.

So do you think I got it all off? You have to warn me next time.

Sorry, he just came all over me.

Hi,

I'm Indigo.

It's like a midnight blue because, you know, I come alive at night, so... Oh,

yeah, I love that for you. Oh, happy birthday.

I meant to text you, but then I forgot.

Aw, how old are you?

Ooh, you know, I...

Really? I really have to use the bathroom.

All right, we'll go get a drink, won't we, babe?

Yeah. Yeah? And I think I got it all. You know, just be careful around the

toilet, all right?

Toodles, love.

Come on.

Oh, toodles, babe.

I want a hot fog.

Mm-hmm.

Fucking indigo?

You are lovable.

Then just talk to him.

Okay?

Just talk to him.

Okay, I'll talk to him.

Oh, there you are.

Hi. Oh, shit.

Sorry, you scared me. Are you okay? I'm fine. No, don't. You're fine.

It's just other people have just kind of been popping out all over the place.

I've been looking for you.

Oh, uh, here I am.

Uh, can I just ask you a question?

Yeah.

Do I remind you of Eeyore?

I can't say I know who that is. Is he here?

No, he died.

It was fine. Nobody hurt him. OK.

What is happening?

I like you.

I'm sorry. I'm just going to need a little bit of clarity about the thing

you just said to me.

Why do you like me?

Because I'm not like those other boys out there.

That's why I like you.

Because you're kind and funny.

Sensitive.

Sweet.

But really, really funny.

Should I keep going? Yes, of course you should keep going.

And terrible at dodgeball.

Well, it's a fake sport.

And so, so cute.

I said that last part one more time. I'm sorry. I don't know if I heard you.

You're so cute.

Oh, look. Even with toilet paper stuck on your toe. Oh, God, I am cute. Oh,

wait. What? Oh, God. Ew.

This bathroom is... That is not my fault. That's not me.

Can I just ask you one more question?

What?

What is the deal with that Speedo boy out there?

You could be honest. I'm not gonna freak out.

Marcus, you think that he and I... No, never gonna happen. He wanted to do it,

so no, not gonna happen. Oh, no?

It's never gonna happen? Why?

He's real, real dumb. Is it because he's dumb? He's dumb. I knew it. Shocker,

right? How am I looking at people when they're gonna be so dumb?

Okay, you can kiss me. Am I sufficiently... Yeah, I'm gonna go ahead

and do it.

Happy birthday, dear...

Happy birthday to you.

My God.

I love you. I love you, too.

Happy birthday.

There you are.

Oh. Wait, I thought that he was gay.

No, he's not. He's very straight.

And has a very good penis.

Oh, God bless.

Wait, how do you know that?

See, I told you 30 wasn't so bad. I know, you were right. Now 31, she's a

real cunt.

What was it you said that you said anyway?

Yeah, yeah Just waiting for the day I come undone, undone,

undone Trying to find a way to convey today

in the pool