Original subtitles

When His Majesty forced me to swallow the first pill

the ties and bond between us

were long severed

So, what are we waiting for?

Pack your things. Let's head back to our hometown!

But, by leaving like this

Sister

we might meet a tragic end

just like Mr. Jing

Lord Qiankun

This matter has progressed completely according to your plan

and it's been smooth-sailing

So what can possibly make you upset?

Everything has gone on too smoothly

and that's precisely why I'm unsettled

I know Dongfang Shuo

He's not a straight-laced fellow

I'm afraid something's brewing

Don't worry too much, my lord

Even if Dongfang Shuo has an endless bag of tricks

as long as he takes my pill for three consecutive days

the drug's going to get him

By then, even if you tie his hands

he'd wriggle free of it and throw himself to snatch it

I've experimented on a dozen over men

it's foolproof

That's reassuring

But…

What?

That pill is meant for wild beasts after all

Some people really went nuts after consuming it

and some others died within a month

If Dongfang Shuo died too

and His Majesty ordered an investigation, what should we do?

Look at you

Let me tell you

If His Majesty turns his back on us

then we'll just throw everything

to Wang Huai'e to take the blame

And if Wang Huai'e retaliates?

As long as you and I are in agreement

Wang Huai'e won't be able to talk himself out of it

Plus, he's got immunity

He won't die no matter what crime he did

Wicked!

In that case I'm secure

Come, my lord

Your Majesty

Your Majesty

Empress

You've been out of it recently. Anything bothering you?

If Your Majesty care to share your worries with me

I'd feel more relieved

You need not bother

not that you can anyway

Your Majesty, Your Highness

What is it?

Qiu Gu, Dongfang Shuo's missus, have come to seek the Empress

Qiu Gu's here?

- Hurry and let her in. - Understood

Greetings, Your Majesty, Your Highness

Get up, Qiu Gu

What's with you?

Your Majesty, Your Highness

Dongfang Shuo, he's…

He's gone mad!

Immortals and deities, eating and dressing recklessly

No money for rice, so I drink gruel

No clothes to wear, so I wear rags

Taishang Laojun's orders wait for no one!

Hee-yah!

How dare you mere mortals

break into my idyllic Jade Lake?

Not backing down?

I'll behead you in one slash!

Stop, stop!

My lord, His Majesty and Her Highness are here to see you

His Majesty? He's the Jade Emperor, I"ve seen him!

And I've seen Queen Mother of the West too!

Brother Dongfang

Don't tell me you don't recognize me?

Which errant immortal are you? Report your name!

I'm Li Shaojun

Li Shaojun? What's Li Shaojun?

- I'm not a thing, I'm your immortal friend. - Rubbish!

You rat demon, harming people is all you do!

You're not Li Shaojun!

You mistook me for someone else. I'm really Li Shaojun the immortal

Demon, I'll get you!

- Help, Your Majesty! - Dongfang Shuo!

Rat demon, I'll kill you!

Dongfang Shuo!

Rat demon, you can't escape!

- Dongfang Shuo! - Your Majesty!

My lord!

Demon!

Don't kill people, my lord!

Dongfang Shuo hasn't gone crazy

Li Shaojun said

that it's a symptom of him regaining his past-life memories

I don't believe it. It's all Li Shaojun's made-up lies

Dongfang Shuo's gone crazy from their toxic pills!

How could it be?

Li Shaojun didn't say that

one will go crazy from eating his pill

Just think, Your Majesty

Be it Li Shaojun, Wang Huai'e, or Qiankunzi

They're all Dongfang Shuo's archenemies

Even if Dongfang Shuo were an immortal incarnate

they'd only try to get in his way

Why would they help him regain his memory?

Your Majesty

Dongfang Shuo is a meritous minister who's helped you greatly

Just because he often admonishes you in court

doesn't mean you should tolerate him being harmed by scums

So you're saying, I tolerate others as they harm Dongfang Shuo

You suspect me of bearing grudges?

Your Majesty, I'd never suspect your motives like that

But even if no one's saying that now

there's no guarantee that others in the future won't slam you

You!

Woman…

get your priorities straight!

You simply don't get it

that in fact the emperor is the one most afraid of getting harmed!

When facing others

he's the almighty emperor

But away from them

he often trembles with anxiety

Because he knows

how many are actually eyeing his throne

He's terrified that at any time

someone might just stab him from the back

Yes

Dongfang Shuo is sagely and wise

But sometimes he's too clever

So much so that none of the officials

can match up to him

So I both love and hate him, and must stay wary of him

Empress

the emperor is the least likely person to ever sleep well

But, don't you fear

Who am I?

I'm the Crimson Dragon incarnate

the destined Son of Heaven!

From past till present, from the Three Sovereigns and Five Emperors

which emperor had skills that are on par with me?

Whether it's an immortal in heaven or a mortal on earth

Whether it's Dongfang Shuo or Li Shaojun

they're born for me, to be employed as I please

Their fates

are firmly in my grasp

Zifu

have I scared you?

Don't be afraid

I'm the divine son of the Great Han who rules the world

I'm Emperor Wu of Han, the world is mine to command

Dongfang Shuo thought that he's the world's smartest man

He's wrong

I

am the one who's smartest in the world

Madam?

I didn't know you've come to visit, why don't you come in?

I'll pass

Lord Qiankun

Dongfang Shuo has started to regain his senses since last night

Good to hear. That means he's past the muddled stage

and his orifices are recovering

But the physician said it's just a last burst of health before death

How can it be?

Don't ever listen to those incompetent doctors

The immortal pill is taking effect

how can earthly physicians ever get it?

Lord Qiankun

I came on Dongfang Shuo's behalf to invite you

In… invite me?

Dongfang Shuo suddenly wishes to see you

On account of him being your peer

coming from the same hometown

can you go see that dying man?

Well, of course

Dongfang Shuo

Don't worry

During metamorphosis and great transformation

there's always an excruciating process

Grit your teeth and bear it, it'll be fine afterwards

Why are you still lying to me even at this time?

You know that I'm conversant in medicine too

My current symptoms

indicate slow-release poisoning

I'm so far gone that even if I were an immortal

I'd have no energy to return heavenward

That's all good

I'm telling you, Dongfang Shuo

Anyone who takes Li Shaojun's pills or the like

will either die or go insane

If you ask me

you're better off dead and be done with it

If you go crazy, it'll be living hell

- So it's really you who dunked me. - No

Wang Huai'e is the mastermind, he did it to avenge his father

That's a good enough reason

Harming Liu Nan

coercing Jing Kui

and now…

poisoning me too

This whole series of schemes

can't possibly come out of Wang Huai'e's mind

Well said. It's all my idea

You!

Why did you…

Blame yourself for being so clever

With you around, I won't ever see the light of day

So that's why

Qiankunzi

You're not stupid

but this time

you did the dumbest thing in the world

Did I?

Do enlighten me

With me dead

His Majesty

His Majesty will surely

kill you too

You're in no state to threaten me

Since the upright one is dead

then the wicked one's lifespan has reached its end too

That's the ironclad craft of the emperors, unyielding through the ages

Dongfang Shuo, you're completely off the mark this time

The hunting dog gets cooked once it caught the rabbit

the bow is retired once all the birds are gone

What we're doing this time

is helping His Majesty cook the dog and retire the bow

If anything, he'd be elated

You…

What are you doing? What do you want?

Qiu Gu

Yesterday, when Dongfang Shuo and Qiankunzi were talking

were you there?

I overheard things outside the door

Your Majesty, I'm not a fool

Why would I casually tell someone that I harmed them?

- Qiankunzi! - Your Majesty! - Qiu Gu

Qiu Gu

Dongfang Shuo's passing

brought me great sorrow too

But you can't lose your wits because of that

and accuse my minister so flippantly

Your Majesty

Since the three of them said that the pills aren't poisoned

I have with me Dongfang Shuo's leftover medicine, Your Majesty

He had Li Shaojun prepare an extra month's portion in advance

Please issue an edict

and get the three of them to consume these for three days

in front of Your Majesty and everyone else

I have nothing to say then

Your Majesty, Qiu Gu has said as much

Please issue an edict and make the three of them take it

Yes, get the three of them to take it

Please issue an edict to make them take the medicine, Your Majesty

- Li Shaojun. - Yes, Your Majesty

Since you said there's no poison in the medicine

then the three of you

are to each consume one pill here and now to prove your innocence

Your Majesty, these pills were custom-made for Dongfang Shuo

With my mortal body, I can't take it, I can't

Yes, Your Majesty. Li Shaojun made this pill

- He alone can take it as proof. - That works

Your Majesty, I already said just now

that Dongfang Shuo had been summoned back by the Jade Emperor

It had nothing to do with my pills, Your Majesty

Monster! How dare you spout nonsense!

- Help, Your Majesty! - Gan Fu!

Order in the court

Your Majesty, the Crimson Dragon Emperor!

You can't allow your minister to be so brutish!

What did you call me?

- Crimson Dragon Emperor? - Exactly

Monster, how dare you still run your mouth? I'll kill you!

- Impudence! Guards, throw Gan Fu out!

Where's the head of the Palace Guards?

I, Huo Qubing, the Commander of Palace Guards, greet Your Majesty

Huo Qubing

Why are you dressed in funeral garb?

I'm mourning my godfather Dongfang Shuo

You can only do it at home

how can you wear it to court?

Your Majesty

Princess Liu Nan, my godmother, was framed to death

Before this grudge is repaid

my godfather has fallen victim to evil designs too

I have vowed in front of his tablet

that I won't ever take off this garb before I avenge him

Grand Princess Pingyang has arrived!

Sister, why are you dressed that way too?

I'm doing it to mourn my husband

Preposterous! Just utterly ridiculous!

Wei Qing is standing right there

What's this about mourning him?

Him and Dongfang Shuo

were sworn brothers joined in life and death

Before he came to court today, he once told me

if he's not able to turn

Dongfang's wrongful conviction in court

he'll pay with his life

I'm wearing this in advance

and have come to collect his corpse

Grand Princess

Her Highness the Empress has arrived!

Zifu, what are you up to now?

- I'm mourning Dongfang Shuo. - Your Highness

Madness! You're the empress! There's no sense in mourning a minister!

Dongfang Shuo was my sworn second brother

A sister mourning her brother

- is in accordance with heavenly and human norms. - You!

You lot

Are you testing my limit?

Your Majesty, I wish to make a statement

Speak

I think that Dongfang Shuo's death

should not be disputed in court

Your Majesty may hand this case to Zhang Tang for adjusdication

Your words reflect my wishes, Prime Minister. Zhang Tang

Yes, Your Majesty

I command you

to take Qiankunzi, Wang Huai'e and Li Shaojun

back to the yamen of the Judicial Commissioner

Interrogate them thoroughly and get to the bottom of it

Rest assured, Your Majesty. Even a true immortal

will not escape my prodding to make them spill the facts

- Guards! - Yes!

- Take these three men to the Ministry of Justice. - Understood

Your Majesty

I have something to say

Your Majesty, Li Shaojun had indeed laced the pill with poison

but I… had nothing to do with it!

Your Majesty, this thing

about poisoning

was forced upon me

by Lord Wang Huai'e, Your Majesty

Li Shaojun! You lie!

It's… it's got nothing to do with me!

Lord Wang, just admit it

Your Majesty, Dongfang Shuo killed Lord Wang's father

His vengeful thoughts

- led him to devise this plot. - Yes, Your Majesty

Utter bull!

Qiankunzi, now you want to do me in too!

Your Majesty, then let me tell the truth

Li Shaojun was never some immortal

Qiankunzi asked me to get him

- to deceive you, Your Majesty. - You lie!

And! Getting Zhu Wan to frame Liu Nan

and the one-eyed man to harm Jing Kui

- were all Qiankunzi's ideas! - Shut up, all of you!

- Zhang Tang. - Yes, Your Majesty

Drag them out immediately

and feed each of them the immortal pill

- Spare me, Your Majesty! - Please, no, Your Majesty!

I'm wronged!

A wise decision, Your Majesty

Long live the Emperor!

They're in?

Let's hope Shuo's plan will succeed

Chamberlain. This is the main steward of the Palace, Chamberlain Yang

Receive my kowtow, Chamberlain

Save it. Get up and speak

Open up

When did you find him dead?

I just discovered it when I did the morning inspection

He probably breathed his last around midnight

You said you found something else?

Your Honor

To the Crimson Dragon

On the Jade Emperor's orders

I have dispatched my disciple Li Shaojun to the mortal world to aid you

achieve immortality so as to be a steward and a blessing for the people

Alas, Li Shaojun fought with his peer the Chunyang attendant

and caused a storm

I could only beseech the Jade Emperor

to summon back the Chunyang attendant and Li Shaojun in advance

A year of you consuming immortal pills has ensured a firm foundation

You need only to continue your training

and complete the grand ceremony of Fengshan offerings

Your merit shall then be complete and you shall reap the fruit

With respect, Taishang Laojun

In that case

immortals who came to earth actually contended with each other too

Li Shaojun and Dongfang Shuo

were called back to heaven just like that

Thankfully, Your Majesty's consitution is now secure

As long as you do according to Taishang Laojun's letter

and complete the Fengshan ceremony soon

even if there are no more immortals supporting you

you can still cultivate immortality

What about Qiankunzi?

Your Majesty

It was discovered this morning

that Qiankunzi is no longer able to speak. He's a mute now

A mute?

It's most likely Li Shaojun's immortal pill

taking effect

Your Majesty

Qiankunzi has incited the two supporting immortals to fight

and caused chaos in court. His crime is unpardonable

Please, on account of Dongfang Shuo

having previously helped Your Majesty establish great feats

kill Qiankunzi to honor Dongfang Shuo

Kill him

Dongfang Shuo, on my word

Your own cleverness had driven you to your death

But with your death

you had earned the Great Han dynasty its prosperity today

You

died a worthy death

A worthy death

Death comes to all men

yet one bears the weight of Mount Tai, another as fleeting as a feather

His Majesty has arrived!

Your Majesty

Do get up

Mrs. Dongfang

I have executed Qiankunzi

May it be a consolation to you

Your Majesty

There is still Wang Huai'e

He's a treacherous scumbag too

Mrs. Dongfang

I had promised the Empress Dowager immunity on Wang Huai'e life

Furthermore, all the schemes were Qiankunzi's ideas

Therefore

I have stripped Wang Huai'e of his post, never to be employed again

Please extend your understanding

Dongfang Shuo, you can't rest in peace!

Did you hear?

There's still one villain who killed you

living scot-free

- Qiu Gu. - Your Highness

My husband, he can't rest in peace

Dongfang Shuo

My dear Dongfang

you shouldn't leave me so soon

Your Majesty

stay strong

It's already late

We'd better send Mrs. Dongfang on her way

Mrs. Dongfang, please be on your way

Your Highness, Your Majesty, I wish you a safe return home too

Hu, stop the car

Come, Hu

Come help

Hu, hurry

Open this coffin

- Hurry up! - You're… - I'll explain afterwards

Get a move!

- Open it, what are you waiting for? - Open it? - Yes!

Don't shout

Man, that was stuffy as hell

Bro

Bro, don't be afraid

Don't be afraid

- Are you a man or a ghost? - Of course I'm a man

What's this about?

I didn't die, I'm still alive, that's what

They didn't poison the medicine they gave you?

Let's go to the forest by that side. I'll tell you

Let me out first

Right from the start when they forced me to take the pill

I knew that it must be poisoned

I did eat the first one

But then I went to the toilet

I used my finger to relentlessly gouge at my throat

and I vomited it all out

For the second and third pills, I swapped them

Bro, how did you swap them?

Hu

he used to turn tricks

It's a simple sleight of hand for him

Brother-in-law sure is capable

You feigned death once and two treacherous ministers are rid of

No, it's three

But His Majesty did not kill Wang Huai'e

So you guys go ahead, find an inn and stay there

I'll rush back to Chang'an right away

Who's there?

Who are you?

I'm here to take your life

Dongfang Shuo

Ghost!

I'm Jing Kui

I'm Liu Nan

Bros, this fella's out

Let's go

The Fengshan ceremony at Mount Tai commences!

Long live the Emperor!

Long live the Emperor!

Long live the Emperor!

Zifu, what are you thinking of?

I somehow feel that Dongfang Shuo didn't die

If we go to Yanci in Shandong now

we'll surely see him

Yellow bird, yellow bird

Do not settle on the paper mulberry

Do not eat my paddy

The people of this country

Are not willing to treat me well

I will return, I will go back

Dongfang Shuo

World's number one

No

His Majesty has now ranked first, and Dongfang Shuo second

No

Dongfang Shuo ranks first it is