Original subtitles

Faster than a speeding bullet.

More powerful than a locomotive.

Able to leap tall buildings at a single bound.

Look, up in the sky. It's a bird. It's a plane.

It's Superman.

Yes, it's Superman.

Strange visitor from another planet who came to Earth with powers and abilities

far beyond those of mortal men.

Superman, who can change the course of mighty rivers.

Bend steel in his bare hands.

And who, disguised as Clark Kent, mild-mannered reporter for a great

metropolitan newspaper, fights a never-ending battle for truth, justice,

and the American way.

And now, another exciting episode in The Adventures of Superman.

If it makes any difference to you who you saved, I'm Homer Garrity. Oh, the

private detective? How do you do?

I'm flattered that you know me.

Well, I'm glad I looked down when I was flying. Time to see those bricks fall.

It's probably just one of the thousands of rotten chimneys around here.

Were you sure it was an accident?

Oh, my, yes. Nothing that glamorous ever happens to members of my profession in

real life.

Well, if I were you, I'd look up once in a while.

At least a dozen persons saw it happen, and each one phoned in the story.

The first one said Superman had been showered with bricks.

The second one said concrete blocks.

By the time I got the last one, an entire building had collapsed on him.

And you should have seen the look on Homer Garrity's face when it happened.

And how do you happen to know about the look on his face?

Yes, Kent, just how do you know that?

Well, I happened to be nearby at the time. Oh, now don't tell me that I had a

reporter at the scene of a story for the change.

Maybe he was nearer than you think, Chief.

Come on, Jim.

Chief, what do you suppose you mean by that?

My boy, when a woman has nothing to say, she talks in riddles.

Just to keep every person in a state of confusion.

I'm with you.

If I could offer a little brain, along with my blonde, Miss Lane, I'd say that

someday you're going to get into trouble trying to prove that Mr. Kent is

Superman.

If he isn't, how do you explain his slip about the expression on Gary's face?

He said he just happened to be there.

He said. Well, I've had this book fixed for a week just waiting for a chance to

plant it. And this is the chance.

This thing weighs over 50 pounds and no ordinary man is going to be able to lift

it easily.

No ordinary boy either. Okay, come on.

Hi, Lois. Jimmy.

Hi. Busy?

No, not doing a thing.

No one's making any news these days. Except Superman.

Uh, Clark, I'd like to look up a phone number. Would you hand me the book,

please? Oh, sure, Lois. Here, catch.

Miss Lane!

Something the matter?

Oh, no, nothing at all.

Ready, Jim? More or less, I guess.

Oh, Miss Lane.

Aren't you going to call your number?

I just remembered it.

Thank you, Mr.

Kent.

You're welcome, Miss Lane.

Now are you convinced?

More than ever.

Well, what do you mean by that?

Well, Clark switched the books, right?

That means he discovered ours was a dummy. And how did he discover it was a

dummy? With his x-ray vision, that's how.

But that dummy telephone book was loaded with lead. And x-rays can't see through

lead. You don't have to go through lead to see it, silly.

Collie, you're right.

And I have an idea that'll prove I'm right. Come on.

If there's one thing I hate, it's having even the vaguest idea of where I'm going

or why.

Now you know.

Gee, a private eye.

You know, Miss Lane, if I ever got fired from the Daily Planet, which almost

happens every day, that's what I'd like to be, a Seamus.

A Seamus?

Sure. My own private secretary.

Torpedoes from Toledo.

Slinky gun mouths, the killer fleeing from the sight of my steel blue eyes and

rock-like jaw.

I thought I heard voices. Are you looking for me?

No, we're looking for Homer Garrity, the private eye.

I'm Homer Garrity. Come in, won't you?

You?

I'm Lois Lane, and this is Jimmy Olsen. It's a pleasure.

Come in.

All my clients are disappointed at first. They expect a cross between a

gorilla and Sherlock Holmes.

Sit down, won't you? Thank you.

Now, what can I do for you? I'll get right to the point, Mr. Garrity. I want

someone followed. Clark Kent of the Daily Planet.

Would you mind telling me why?

Well, if I'm right, I think you'll find out why.

Well, I could start this evening. I'm just winding up a blackmail case.

Blackmail?

Yes, I finally discovered who the blackmailer is. I'll turn the

information over to my client this afternoon, and my part of the job is

done. You mean you won't even make the arrest yourself?

No, that's up to my client and the police.

Either I've been going to too many movies, or you haven't been going to

enough.

Just so you won't be too disillusioned.

Look, I do own these things, and I have a license to carry this gun.

Oh.

But in all my years' experience, I've never used a gun.

Nor any of this paraphernalia.

Oh.

Maybe this will impress you, young man.

You see this mirror?

Yeah. All right, come with me.

Look.

Oh, but, but... That's right.

Miss Lane can't see you at all. This is a special one-way window. The other side

of it's a mirror.

Well, now, this is more like it.

I must confess I love all sorts of gadgets.

Sometimes I use it to watch my clients.

It helps me to find out whether they're telling me the truth or not.

You mean your own clients lie to you? Oh, quite often. Now, you stay here and

watch how you can see every move in that room.

Okay.

Keep both hands on the desk, Garrity.

Certainly, Mr. Leonard.

Who's the dame?

Sales lady.

Office supplies.

She has nothing to do with us.

Garrity? Homer Garrity?

Who's this?

Just the guy you got out of a jam once, Homer.

So I'm returning the favor.

Hey, Murray, rack him up. What kind of a journey are you running?

Shut up, you guys, will you?

Who's that?

Oh, never mind.

Listen, Garrity, I'm tipping you off.

A couple of characters are out to get you.

So watch it, will you?

That's all.

Hello, operator. Give me the police. This is an emergency.

Hello, police. I want to report a kidnapping.

Lois Lane. Homer Garrity. Just about a... Never mind.

You handle it your way.

I'll handle it mine.

Miss Latour, take a memo.

I'm calling this the unfortunate kidnap caper.

It all started quite innocently enough with Lois Lane and Homer Garrity being

let out at gunpoint.

Then came the phone call from the mysterious tipster.

Now I'm off to find the tipster himself.

How, Miss Latour?

Elementary. I merely look for a pool hall run by a citizen named Maury.

No license.

Thanks, baby.

I know I'm a genius.

But sometimes I get tired of slapping around these punk hoodlums all day.

Oh, well.

Somebody has to do it.

And a memo.

What do you figure that is?

Beach, man.

Thunder's left on. The guy's packing a rod. I can spot him a mile away.

A copper?

Let's find out.

Got a match?

What for?

Like my cigar. Here, have one.

I thought you didn't have a match.

I used mine on my own, is that?

I didn't think of that.

Say, you ain't Babyface McGloin, are you? My name's Olsen.

Oh, yeah. You're the big butter and egg man from down east, ain't you?

Nah, I'm an I.

A Seamus.

Yeah?

I'm a private detective myself.

Then you must know Homer Garrity.

Garrity?

What about him?

That's what I'd like to know.

You're in the wrong place, buddy.

Maybe. See you around.

See you.

Hello, Cappy?

This is Fingers.

Listen, about Garrity. Don't turn around.

Tell him you'll call later and hang up.

I'll call you back.

Oh.

Same kid, huh?

If you're goofy enough to follow me here, you're goofy enough to have a gun

and use it.

You're gonna answer a couple of questions.

Who's Cappy?

What did he do with Homer and Miss Lane?

Come on, talk still. Open up. Let's have it.

Please.

All right, kid.

Go ahead. Blast away.

My poor old mother will get along without me somehow.

You have a poor old mother?

You should see her.

110 years old.

Sitting in a rocking chair.

Rocking and knitting.

Well, in that case... Would you mind stepping over there and putting your

wrist up against the bedpost?

Move!

Whatever you say, kid.

Now!

Hey! What did you do to me?

I didn't do nothing. You did it yourself.

Have fun, kid.

And don't bother yelling. In this joint, nobody pays any attention.

Oh, just in case.

Enjoy yourself, kid.

Some Seamus.

What's up, Chief?

The police just phoned. They got an anonymous tip about somebody named

Garrity and Lois Lane being kidnapped.

Lois? Yes.

Do you know anything about this, Kent? No, not a thing.

You know, one day I'm going to chain you and Lois and Olsen to your desks. Then

maybe I can get some peace of mind.

Well, it could be a mistake to you, but I'll check on it just the same.

Why can't I just lose my mind and it'll all be over with?

For ten years, I've been running one of the juiciest blackmail rackets in the

country. Then you had to stick your nose in it. That's my job.

Sure, but what I want to know is who hired you.

Just one of your victims.

Who finally decided to be smarter to pay me for a little while than pay you

forever. I'll find out how smart he is when I find him. Somehow, I don't think

you're going to.

I'll find him, all right.

Garrity will tell me.

Or you will.

She doesn't know anything. I told you that.

She says she's your secretary.

As a matter of fact, I don't know anything. But even if I did, I wouldn't

tell you.

She's got nerve, huh, Cappy?

Yeah, real nerve.

She's gonna need it.

You know, Garrity, Superman saved you from me once, but he ain't gonna do it

again.

Well, what are you doing here, Fingers?

I tried to tell you on the phone. There's some screwy kid running around

playing detective.

So what?

So he's on to something. I don't know how, but he is. If he is, maybe somebody

else is, too. Where's the kid now?

I got him in my room.

He handcuffed himself to me bed.

Well, what'd you leave him for, stupid? Get him and bring him here.

This ain't good, Cappy. Suppose somebody finds us here with them. Don't worry,

they won't.

Cappy, those things went out with high-button shoes.

I only use it for emergencies.

No sense messing you up.

Yet.

Noodles, take him downstairs.

All right, move.

7-P-R-S-8-T

-U-V-V-S-V-R-S-U.

Sunset 36133.

Sunset 36133. See Leonard? We popped her away.

I'm off to find the tipster himself.

How, baby?

Elementary. I merely look for a pool hall run by a citizen named Maury.

Thanks, baby. I know I'm a genius, but sometimes I get tired of slapping around

punk hoodlums all day.

Oh, well, somebody has to do it.

End of memo.

I'll still feel better when Fingers gets back with that kid.

Well, that's what we're waiting for. Then we'll take care of the three of

them at once. How?

Same way we've done things before, remember?

Sure, boss.

That's the way I like it.

Quiet, neat, and quick.

All right, you guys, back against the wall.

I must be seeing things.

Better do like he says. He looks dangerous to me.

I got an itchy trigger on this finger. I mean, finger on the trigger. You two, up

against the wall.

Now tell me, what did you do with them?

With who?

You know who I mean.

Something happens to me when I see guys like you. Something happens inside of

me. I go wild.

I'm warning you.

Please, buddy, give us a break, will you?

Yeah, have a heart, buddy.

In my business, a heart only gets in the way.

Now tell me what I want to know. I'll give you until I count to three.

One, two, three.

I'll give you another chance.

One, two, three.

Jimmy!

I'm afraid so, Miss Lane.

I'm afraid so.

A guy can make a million bucks being a comedian. Yeah, a promising career like

that, we gotta cut it short.

Well, we got all the pigeons in the coop, boss. What next? You get

everything set. I'll see you in a minute.

Well, at least I found out one thing.

Private detecting certainly isn't as easy as it looks.

Especially when it looks like the dead bodies you discover are going to be your

own. According to the movies, this is the point where the slinky woman appears

and shows us the secret way out.

Well, I'll settle for Superman.

It's no use, Jim. Not even Superman could find us in here.

Change of mind about talking, Garrity?

If I told you who my client is, he'd be killed.

And you wouldn't let us go anyway.

Okay, Noodles.

Much cleaner this way.

No bullets, no murder weapon, no nothing.

Nobody will ever know what happened to you.

Last chance. Want to talk?

No?

Okay.

What are you doing here?

I'm looking for the man who telephoned Homer Garrity.

You just gave yourself away.

You must be the man or you wouldn't be frightened.

I was just trying to help, honest.

That's exactly what I'm trying to do.

Then go to 18 Poplar Way, that's all I can tell you.

Let's hope it's enough.

It looks like the end of the line for all of us.

Jesus, my friend, what would the chief do without us?

What are we going to do without him?

Superman!

He inhaled enough of that gas to kill ten men. And he's got us trapped in

here.

Well, you better get Miss Lane out in the fresh air, Superman.

Quick, he's gone. Now's our chance.

Out of my way, Platt!

Like that, Mr. Garrity?

Exactly like that, Jimmy.

And how do you feel now, Miss Lane?

Much better, thanks.

Jimmy, I always wanted a chance to try that judo stuff.

And it works real great, too. Why, those guys will be out there next Tuesday.

But, Mr. Garrity, right now I'd like to give you back your office.

Miss Lane, there's one thing that still bothers me. How did you happen to get

mixed up in all this? Oh, how did she get mixed up in anything?

She was just trying to prove... Never mind, Jim.

Okay, okay.

Well, Miss Lane, I... Guess I'd better get started on that assignment you gave

me. Following your friend? That won't be necessary, Mr. Garrity.

If you don't mind, I'd just as soon call the whole thing off.

It's all right with me. I could use a couple of days' rest.

Mr.

Garrity, one more thing.

Do you have a duplicate set of keys?

Keys? Why?

Because I did it again!