Original subtitles

- We must have raised the temperature. - Come on!

Welcome to the submarine club. And you passed the test with flying colors.

Oh, I thought it was that good underwater.

I'd have joined long ago. Let's go down for another crash dive.

Hey, rest of the gang.

Hey, you guys, get all the pops?

Take a deep breath, Ali, baby. I got four pockets full.

Well, you ready to fly, gentlemen?

Oh, let's crash dive once more first.

I'll save it for later, sailor.

Let's sink the ship and join here.

You got colors for this happening?

If I got the colors, I'll make you a masterpiece.

What's your pleasure, treasure?

Call me red. Red hot.

All right, come on.

All right, come on.

All right, let's go.

Come on down, Ali.

Ah, damn cooler, will you? Even the superteeth have to stop some time.

Hey, what do you say let's get out of this puddle?

I just wonder if I can do what I can do.

That little bitch, I'll chop it off.

Come on, big young boy.

You save it, can't stop.

I'll chop it off. The only thing that's going to get chopped, Chicky, is you.

Man, you know, I never really saw quicksand before.

Goodbye, girl. I guess I'll paint you dead.

Okay, trash. I'll see you all downstairs.

Soon, I hope.

I'm sorry I hit you so hard, Smiley.

That's okay, Chicky. Just don't do it again.

All right. That's enough laughs. Let's get on with our search for the White Pyramid.

Hey, Arnie, stack the paint. Left roll.

Me Willem.

Put that back. Put it back. Put it back, I said.

What matter?

You know, dank, blasted well. Indians aren't supposed to win around here.

Indian know Willem? That's right.

Know Willem.

Where you come from?

Hey, he been thinking better fix roof.

Right here.

Hey, man, any of you guys got any bread?

Hell, man, I'm broke.

What, man?

Hell, man, I'm on advanced steps at a poorhouse.

Okay, Skaggs, get it on the road. We got a hit of sucker.

Come on. Come on.

Something's moving this way.

Hello, honey. You got room for some sex-starved females?

Uh, sure. Hop in. I'm going to include you, Ar.

I'm going to include you, too.

Marsha?

I thought so.

What's yours?

John?

It had to be.

I've got four aces. I've got four kings.

I've got, pardon the expression, four queens.

And I've got five big Jacks. And the name of the game, please.

Who needs girls anyway?

There's more important and exciting things in life than girls.

There's...

There's... There's girls.

I have to walk, Ardy.

Take a cold shower, Ardy.

Well, I'll be damned.

Will you look at that?

Whoo!

And where are you?

Oh, there you are.

Oh, I'm calling you.

And you're calling me.

Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful.

Oh, boys, take a cold shower.

Hello.

Hello, um.

I mean, uh, hello, um.

Kimo Sabi. Say, uh, you wouldn't happen to have a towel, would you?

Mm-hmm.

Oh, you do? Hey, that's great, Indian. Thank you.

Why you take them cold showers?

Well, you see, I'm with this bunch of guys down at the pipe.

And they all have girls except me.

Hmm.

Girls? You Kimo Sabi girls?

Me Kimo Sabi girls.

You want them, girl?

Sure. You got one?

How much money you got them?

Money? Oh.

Let's see now.

I got, uh, $27 and one trading stamp.

Mm-hmm.

Girl, cost them you $27 and one trading stamp.

Oh, wait a minute, Chief. Those are pretty high prices for a short timer.

No short timer. You gotta keep them.

Keep them? Really?

Hey, that's great. Here's your dough.

Hey, wait a minute. Do you know Indian giver?

Oh.

Oh, yeah.

Okay. Where's the girl?

Well, first, what kind of girl do you want them?

You mean I got a choice?

Well... I had a girl.

Man, we should... No, tell them out loud. Whose put her in earm?

No, no. Whose put her in the bad ear, in the good ear.

That's my girl.

What?

Oh, me too.

Hey, here.

Shut that out, Chief. What's the matter with you? I'm not a girl.

Oh, me like them boys too.

Okay. You want to go? Me, that's them.

My 27 dollars.

Oops, um, make up a second.

Mmm.

Oh, look at me.

Go on.

Push.

Are you awake, eh?

Let me go! Let me get you! I'm going to do it! I'm going to do it!

Go! Go!

You sure you never had a twin sister?

Come on, I've got to tell the gang about this.

A little shower under this tree, see? And then the Indian comes by and I said,

Kimo Sarvias, you've got towel dry myself? And he says, you want girl?

I said, yeah, I want a girl. And then he goes...

And then he goes...

Just puff, huh? Just puff, you believe it?

I'm a virgin, you know.

How nice. Are you married?

Yes.

Any children?

Three boys.

Impossible.

What? Are you calling me a liar?

No, I mean it with impossible luck I have to have met such a phenomenon.

You will be gentle.

Of course.

Damn! Damn! Hi! Damn!

This is what I think it is.

L... S... D...

Let him!

This is what I think it is.

This is what I think it is.

This is what I think it is.

This is what I think it is.

Arti?

Arti! What's happening here?

Oh, no!

Hey, you want anything? All right. Just make a wish. Anything you want. I mean it. Any wish. Big Jack, come here. Make a wish. Any

wish. Go ahead. Let me give you this. I've always wanted to make it with my boss's wife. I'll tell you why. She's my next door neighbor.

And oh, devil, she's got them. Oh, and what I could do with that woman.

Only to take a bite. A bite. Come on. That's it. And then, take a bite.

Hiya, Norma. I thought I'd stop by to say hello to you.

For two years, I've been hoping you'd come over. Well, aren't you going to seduce me? What?

I said, are you going to seduce me? Well, I thought about it. Okay. Take your clothes off.

Wait a minute. I can't just take my clothes off. Why not? Well, I need a little romance, Norma. You know, when a guy and a

girl are alone, there's this kind of electricity between them. Like a magnet drawing them together. You kiss and then you...

Get to there again. We need a little... little time, Norma. Well, we've got to argue about it. Let's forget it. Well, could we at least kiss once, Norma? Let me help you. Wait a minute, Norma.

Now, this is crazy. Now, stop this. I just can't make love on demand. Why not? Why not? Well, look at it this way now. Make himself and work. His wife says, well, now, let me see. Now, let me see.

Now, 4.30, we're going to have lunch. 5.30, we're going to wash the dishes. 6.30, we're going to make love. And 7.30, we're going to bed. And the next thing you know, the cops will be driving

around saying, all right, you can make love. You have exactly 10 minutes instead of parking meters. You know what they're going to have? Love meters. I don't know. I guess you just can't win.

Let's play the same game we played in the woodshed when I was 15. Remember?