Original subtitles

[ Upbeat music plays ]

>> So, what do you think of my tree house, girls?

>> Very nice! >> I just love what you've done

with the bathroom. >> Thanks.

I went for understated chic. >> Molly has such a good eye for

interior design. >> Yeah.

>> Oh, yes. >> Boring!

You think because it's in a tree it's all that?

Well, it isn't. It's just as boring as a real

house. I mean, what is it you actually

do in here, Molly? >> Well, uh, i just hang out,

watch the boys. >> Darwin: Come on, gumball!

>> Come on! Go! [ Car alarm blaring ]

>> Gumball: [ Groans ] >> Lame!

You don't watch boys -- you kiss them.

>> All: What?! >> Hold on.

don't tell me you don't have boyfriends.

You do, Molly, right? >> Uh...Sure, i do.

You don't know him, though. He's way older, and he's in high

school. >> All: Whoa!

>> Well, my boyfriend's so old that he doesn't have a

babysitter. >> All: Whoa!

>> Well, mine's so old, he stopped wearing braces.

>> All: Wow! >> Well, mine is so old that he

doesn't have teeth. >> [ Sighs ]

I wish i had a boyfriend. >> Gumball: [ Grunting ]

[ Bones cracking ] Did penny see my stunt?

>> don't tell me you want to impress those -- those --

those...Perfumed sissies! >> Gumball: You mean those girls

over there? Nah.

[ Inhales deeply ] They wouldn't care about a

handsome bachelor, 12 years old, who likes world cinema, fine

dining, extreme sports, and long romantic walks on the beach by

moonlight. [ Creaking ]

>> Let's make a pact, right here, right now -- pals before

gals! >> All: Pals before gals!

>> Gumball: Uh...Okay. >> Wait! Wait! Wait!

Let's make a blood pact. [ Grunting ]

>> So, your turn to tell us, masami.

Do you have a boyfriend? >> [ Nervously ] Yeah, huh!

He's -- i-it's... It's...

Darwin! >> All: Darwin?!

>> Yeah! He's great because he's got

legs, and, you know, a head. >> Okay.

[ Grunting ] >> Gumball: Dude, stop it

already. [ Girls giggling ]

>> Guys! Guys! Guys! Enemy at 12:00.

No. This way! >> Here is is!

>> Remember, pals before gals. >> Hello, sweet cheeks!

>> Boys: What?! >> Oh, come on.

He's not your boyfriend, masami. >> [ Scoffs ] He so is.

Look. Hold my book, boyfriend!

>> Darwin: Uh...Okay. >> I'll show you how much he

likes me at the tree house. [ Girls giggling ]

>> I can't believe it. You -- you -- you...Girl lover!

>> Gumball: It's always the quiet ones.

>> Darwin: She's not my girlfriend!

What am i gonna do?! What am i gonna do?!

I know! I'll just run away and hide

forever!

I'll never forget you guys! >> Gumball: That was dramatic.

>> Hey, gumball. [ Honk! ]

>> Gumball: Hey, penny. >> Want to walk me to the

canteen? >> Gumball: Definitely...

Not. Definitely not now, but maybe

later? >> Ahem!

>> [ Clicks tongue ] >> Gumball: [ Sighs ]

[ Thud ] >> Okay.

See you later! [ Indistinct conversations ]

>> Gumball: Aah! >> Darwin: Gumball!

I'm scared. >> Gumball: Darwin?

I thought you'd run away forever.

>> Darwin: I got hungry. [ Girls giggling ]

[ Gasps ] Oh, no! They're here!

What am i gonna do now? >> Gumball: don't worry, buddy.

If you can't see them, they can't see you.

>> Both: Ow! Aah!

>> Gumball: Okay. I think we're safe.

[ Both scream ] >> Both: Hey.

>> Yeah. Hi. I was just talking about you,

boyfriend. Come and sit by me.

>> Darwin: [ Groans ] >> Oh, come on!

don't be shy, sugar lumps. Give me a hug!

>> Gumball: [ Grunts ] Excuse me.

Room for [Grunts] one more? [ Grunts ] ahh.

So, what are we talking about? >> [ Scoffs ]

Well, before you so rudely interrupted us, we were talking

about how Darwin is gonna kiss me in the tree house.

>> Darwin: What?! >> Yeah.

Because that's what boyfriend and girlfriend do!

[ Ding! ] Come on, boyfriend.

Let's go somewhere more private. [ Ominous music plays ]

Boyfriend! >> Darwin: Help...Me.

>> Gumball: don't worry, buddy. I'm here for you.

Pals before -- [ Honk! ] Hi, penny.

>> Hey, gumball. >> Gumball: Where was i?

Oh, yeah. Darwin. >> Darwin?

Darwin, where are you? Darwin?

Darwin! [ Gurgling ]

>> Gumball: Huh? What are you doing here?

[ Gurgling, bubbles popping ] >> Darwin: She won't find me

down here! She hates getting her hair wet.

>> Gumball: Really? >> Hey, have you seen Darwin

around? >> Gumball: don't worry, buddy.

I'm on it. Uh-oh.

Oh, man. [ Inhales sharply ]

Pals before gals! [ Boing! ]

>> Hey, masami. Have you seen gumball anywhere?

>> Gumball: Aw, no. I can't do that to penny.

[ Sighs ] On one hand, i create a

diversion and save Darwin. But on the other hand, i splash

penny and look like a -- [ Smack! ]

[ Water bubbling ] >> What was that?

>> I don't know, but it sounded painful.

>> Oh, well. See you at the tree house.

>> Darwin! [ Water bubbling ]

>> Darwin: [ Gasping ] >> There you are!

Come on. We're going for ice cream.

>> Gumball: Aah! Ow!

Aah! Aah! Aah! Aah!

>> Hey! [ Sizzling ]

>> Gumball: Ahh. >> Hey, dude. Nice bikini.

>> Gumball: Thanks. Oh, rocky, wait!

You've had girlfriends before, right?

>> Oh, yeah. Thousands of them. >> Gumball: Well, how do you get

rid of them? >> Well, usually, i just close

my eyes and open my heart. And when i open my eyes again,

they're gone. >> Gumball: What do you mean?

>> Well, i guess they don't want me to talk about my feelings.

>> Gumball: So you mean openly expressing your emotional

turmoil rather than coming up with a convoluted little scheme?

It's so crazy, it just might work!

[ Triumphant music plays ] [ Ding! ]

>> Darwin! >> Darwin: [ Screeches, inhales

deeply ] Listen, masami.

This is very difficult for me to say.

[ Voice breaking ] I'm leaving. We've had good times together,

but it's just not right for me. I can't help how i feel.

It's not your fault. It's mine.

I'm just not ready for something this amazing.

You deserve someone better. Now, farewell, dear heart.

[ Hand flapping ] >> [ Wailing ]

>> Darwin: What should i do? >> Gumball: I don't know.

>> Nice work, Romeo. >> Darwin: Okay! Okay!

I didn't mean it! Boyfriend joke!

Look! I'm laughing! [ Laughs loudly ]

You can stop crying now. Please?

[ Thunder crashes ] Please.

I'll do anything you want! I'll go to the tree house!

I'll -- I'll -- I'll kiss you! >> Okay.

See you there, sweet lips. >> Gumball: [ Laughing ] Oh,

man, i am so sorry. >> Darwin: What did you make me

do? What did you make me do?!

I have to kiss a girl! I'm going to get married!

I don't want to get married! [ Grumbling ]

>> Gumball: I'm sorry, dude. Oh, don't be like that.

>> Darwin: Not cool, man! Not cool!

>> Gumball: don't worry, buddy. I'll save you.

>> Darwin: How?! You need to have a date to get

in that tree house! >> Gumball: Yeah. That is true.

>> And what happened to "pals before gals"?

>> Gumball: It's cool. I'll find a plan to save him.

>> You'd better, 'cause if you don't, we will.

>> Hi, gumball. >> Gumball: [ Giggling ]

>> After you, boyfriend. [ Ding! ]

>> Darwin: Somebody, please help me.

>> What did you say? >> Darwin: Nothing!

I'm climbing. Climbing. >> Gumball: Hey, Darwin.

>> Darwin: [ Gasps ] Oh, no! They got you, too!

>> Gumball: Oh, yeah. They got me.

It was horrible. Oh. Oh, no.

don't drag me in there and kiss me.

[ Laughs ] Oh, well, now that we're here...

>> So, girls, where are all of your boyfriends?

>> [ Laughs nervously ] >> [ Whistling ]

>> [ Whistling ] >> [ Inhales deeply ]

Okay, girls. Confession time. My boyfriend's not real.

[ All gasp ] >> Yeah, mine too.

>> I made mine up. >> So, me and penny are the only

ones with boys to kiss. Darwin?

Come on, boyfriend! >> All: Kiss! Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!

>> Darwin: Gumball! Do something!

>> Gumball: Just a minute. [ Laughs ]

Sorry. I have to save my best friend.

[ Honk! ] >> I'm really glad you came.

>> Darwin: Oh! Please! You don't want to kiss me!

I taste like fish! Aah!

>> Get back here! >> Darwin: Aah! Gumball!

>> It's such a beautiful day, gumball.

>> Gumball: Yeah, but not as beautiful as your antlers.

[ Dreamy music plays ] [ Thud ]

Can you feel the universe moving around us?

[ Thud ] >> Uh, yeah.

It's sort of like a swaying motion, actually.

>> Aah! [ Laughs evilly ]

>> Gumball: Let's kiss and remember this for all eternity.

>> Let's kiss so i can show these losers who's boss.

[ Wood crackling ] >> Gumball: Mmm...

>> Darwin: Mmm... [ All screaming ]

>> Aah! >> Timber!

[ Thud ] >> Gumball: Wow!

That was amazing! Kissing penny was like being run

over by a unicorn. >> Darwin: And kissing masami

wasn't as bad as i thought it would be.

>> Gumball: Bye, penny. >> Darwin: See you later, sugar

lumps. >> Gumball: [ Sighs ]

What fascinating creatures. >> [ Grunting ]

Pals before gals!

>> So, Mr. and Mrs. watterson, i called you in today to

discuss concerns regarding your daughter, anais.

Judging by this alarming painting, you, madam, are

suffering from work-related stress.

You, sir, are not a good role model.

And these two children are clearly lacking in discipline.

[ Both screaming ] >> Mom: Kids, calm down, please!

>> When i look at this painting, i see a family that...

[ Whoosh! ] A family that has problems.

>> Anais: Principal brown, if i may interrupt --

>> oh, don't worry, sweetie. It's not your fault.

It's your fault! >> Dad: [ Snoring ]

I'm sorry, Princess cheesecake. The sausage fairy made me do it.

[ Snoring ] >> Mom: Sweetie, i had no idea

we were such a terrible family. [ Both laughing ]

Boys, please! >> Anyway, for the good of your

family, I've drawn up a recovery schedule to get you back on

track. >> Both: Whoo-hoo! [ Laughing ]

>> I'll make it short. You, madam, need to stop working

and relax. Your husband need to stop

relaxing and work. As for you, gumball and

Darwin... >> Darwin: [ Giggling ]

[ Gasps ] >> ...You'll be spending the day

with Mr. small, the school counselor, to channel your

energy in a less destructive way.

>> Mom: Well, principal, we'd be happy to try anything if you

think it's going to help anais. >> Anais: Can i just say

something? >> Mom: You don't need to,

sweetie. We're all going to get better,

right, boys? >> Both: Uh-huh.

>> Dad: [ Snoring ] >> Mom: I said, "right, boys?!"

>> Dad: Yes! Of course, honey!

What did i just agree to? >> Gumball: You got to get a

job. [ Squeak!]

>> Dad: No-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o... >> Mom: Well, thank you,

principal brown. We'll do our best.

>> Dad: ...O-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o... [ Door slams ]

...o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o... [ Papers shuffling ]

...o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o... >> Uh, Mr. watter--

>> dad: ...O-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o! >> Welcome to my five-step

program for undisciplined children.

Step one -- primal scream. >> Both: What's that?

>> It's when you channel all your rage into a violent, vocal

release, like this. Aah!

You guys try it. >> Gumball: Uh, i don't think i

have any rage. >> Darwin: Me neither.

>> Everyone has anger, gumball. Just look inside yourself and

find it. >> Gumball: Inside?

[ Muffled ] Do you see anything? >> Darwin: [ Echoing ] Uh, no,

nothing at all. >> Try it anyway.

>> Gumball: Okay. [ Inhales deeply ]

[ Squeaking ] >> Oh, you can do better than

that. >> Gumball: [ Inhales deeply ]

[ Squeaking ] [ Warble! ]

>> Okay, Darwin. Your turn. Take a deep breath and let it

all out! >> Darwin: [ Inhales deeply ]

[ Air hissing ] [ Squeak! ]

[ Static crackling ] [ Dog barking ]

>> Mom: Okay, Nicole. Relax. It's for the good of my

daughter. So I'm just going to sit and do

nothing. Oh, this is going to be hard.

[ Car horns honking ] >> Dad: So, how about those f-10

reports that Simon drew up? >> Oh, yeah.

I was reading them in the bathroom.

>> Dad: Ha! Too much information, Charlie!

[ Both laugh ] >> I think you're the best

employee we ever had at chanax incorporated.

Here's the key to the executive washroom.

>> Dad: [ Gasps ] No way!

[ Pop! ] Well, all i have to do is make

that dream come true and I'll be fine.

I'll do it for you, my little girl!

[ Stomach grumbling ] I need that key to the executive

washroom. Aah!

Ooh! Ohh!

[ Squeak! ] [ Both laugh ]

[ Squeak! ] >> Step two -- we need to

channel your destructive energy into something creative, like

painting. >> Both: Oh. Okay.

>> When you think about painting, do you think about

something like this? >> Both: Yeah!

>> Well...You're wrong! This is not painting!

This is not painting! This! Is! Not! Painting!

Burn, you relic of convention! [ Breathing heavily ]

Who wants to go first? >> Gumball: Me!

Me! Me! Me! Pick me! >> The world is your canvas.

Now, be the brush! [ Squish! ]

>> Gumball: My eyes! It burns! Aah!

[ Screaming, whimpering ] >> Not bad.

Your turn, Darwin. >> Darwin: It burns!

>> Mom: [ Panting ] Whew!

So, that's the whole house washed, the car triple waxed,

I've bleached the fruit, alphabetized the fridge and all

its contents, and have polished my cleaning products.

Five hours before anyone gets home.

[ Sighs ] [ Suspenseful music plays ]

[ Whistling ] Whoops!

Oh, how silly of me! Well, i guess I'll have to clean

that up. Oh, no! There goes another one!

[ Glass breaking ] Oh, what am i like?

>> Dad: Come on, Richard! You can do it!

[ Groans ] Oh!

Ow! [ Growls ]

Hmm. >> Huh? What are you --

>> dad: Shh. Keep walking. Whoo-hoo-hoo!

>> Step three -- interpretive dance.

>> Gumball: What is "interpreted-ive" dance?

>> It's where you channel your emotions through body moves.

>> Gumball: That sounds kind of silly.

>> Silly? You think this is silly?

Mommy! Why must you work so much?

Daddy, rise from your slumber and appreciate me!

I'm troubled! Troubled and lost.

don't hate me because I'm beautiful!

Sticks and stone can break... My bones.

I will be reborn... Like a Phoenix.

>> Gumball: Yep. That was kind of silly.

>> Darwin: I thought it was beautiful!

>> Now it's your turn. Come on, gumball.

>> Gumball: All right. [ Piano playing ]

>> Darwin: Whoa! Amazing, gumball!

>> Now pretend you're a hungry crab.

Hungrier! Now be the color orange.

That's yellow! I said orange! That's it.

[ Telephone rings ] [ Bell chimes ]

>> Dad: [ Grunting ] Ohh!

[ Grunting, stretching ]

>> Good afternoon, Mr. watterson.

This is your contract. Please sign here, here, and

here. >> Dad: Okay!

[ Grunts ] >> And here's your pink slip.

It means you're seven hours and 59 minutes late and you're

fired. [ Zip! ]

Ow! [ Whimpers ]

[ Bell chimes ] [ Muffled ] Thank you for your

kindness. Bye!

Ow! >> Step four of your five-step

program, where you'll learn that the greatest enemy to a warrior

of happiness is... Inhibition!

>> Both: Hai, small sensei! >> Destroy this negative

feeling. >> Gumball: Yah!

Ow! >> Again.

>> Gumball: [ Grunts ] >> Again.

>> Gumball: [ Grunts ] >> Again.

No. Again.

Come on! Destroy those inhibitions!

>> Gumball: [ Squeaking ] I'm trying!

>> Darwin: don't worry, buddy! I'll help you!

Aah! >> Aah!

Whoa! [ Whimpers ]

>> Darwin: Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo, inhibitions!

[ Breathing heavily ] Shoo!

We did it, Mr. small. >> Ah. Very good, kids.

You're now black belts in small-Kwon-do.

And, remember, boys -- when the monkey looks at the mountain...

>> Both: He's looking for bananas.

>> Dismissed. >> Gumball: Wait a minute.

What about step five? >> [ Laughs ]

The fifth step was within you all along.

Just be yourselves. >> Gumball: Weak.

[ Crashing ] >> Mom: [ Laughing ] Oh, no!

It's broken! How will i ever clean it all up?

[ Laughs ] I feel so relaxed!

>> Dad: [ Sobs ] I never want to work again!

It was horrible! [ Snoring ]

[ Door opens, closes ] >> Gumball: Hi, mom.

>> Mom: Oh, hi, kids. How was your day?

>> Darwin: We had loads of fun! >> Gumball: We learned to dance,

scream, paint... >> Both: And smash stuff!

>> Mom: Smash stuff? That sounds interesting.

>> So, let's see what positive effect my program has had on

your barbaric family. >> Anais: Principal brown, can i

just say -- >> oh, there's nothing to worry

about, sweetie. Now say hello to your all-new,

healthy, responsible family! [ Screaming and crashing ]

What is going on here?! [ Needle screeches ]

You've made no progress whatsoever!

[ All talking ] >> I don't want excuses.

>> Anais: Excuse me! If you'd listen for a second,

you'd know i never wanted anyone to change.

>> Mom: But i thought you were unhappy, honey.

That painting -- >> anais: That painting says

"i love my family exactly as they are."

[ Giggles ] >> Dad: Does that mean i don't

have to go back to work? >> Anais: Uh-huh.

>> Dad: Yes! [ Snoring ] >> Anais: Can i play with you

guys now? >> Mom: Of course.

There you go, honey. >> Anais: Hyah!

>> All: Whoo-hoo! [ Laughter ]

>> Darwin: Whoo-hoo! Aah!

>> Dad: [ Snoring ] [ All shouting ]

>> Well, uh, good job, everyone. I'll let myself out.

Oh, and you'll go back to your normal classes tomor--

>> Darwin: Be the brush! >> It burns.