Original subtitles

When I woke up this morning, I forgot what I'd dreamed of

When I woke up this morning, I forgot what I'd dreamed of

Now the rest of my dreams are waiting for me to go to sleep again

Now the rest of my dreams are waiting for me to go to sleep again

Now the rest of my dreams are waiting for me to go to sleep again

Now the rest of my dreams are waiting for me to go to sleep again

Now the rest of my dreams are waiting for me to go to sleep again

Now the rest of my dreams are waiting for me to go to sleep again

Now the rest of my dreams are waiting for me to go to sleep again

Now the rest of my dreams are waiting for me to go to sleep again

Now the rest of my dreams are waiting for me to go to sleep again

I can't ignore you and all you are

I can't ignore you and all you are

I can't ignore you and all you are

I can't ignore you and all you are

I can't ignore you and all you are

I can't ignore you and all you are

I can't ignore you and all you are

I can't ignore you and all you are

I can't ignore you and all you are

I can't ignore you and all you are

The reason I have

The reason I have

The reason I have

The reason I have

The reason I have

for that

h

is that I'm a hero

The burning heat of my skin

blasts apart your answer to my question

and in my memory they are all 'yes'

and in my memory they are all 'yes'

and in my memory they are all 'yes'

and in my memory they are all 'yes'

and in my memory they are all 'yes'

and in my memory they are all 'yes'

That's pretty awesome, right?

Let's hold hands and go through thick and thin

We are faster than our thoughts

When we are together, we can make it through anything

Forever, through anything

Forever, through anything

Forever, through anything

Forever, through anything

Forever, through anything

Forever, through anything

Forever, through anything

Forever, through anything

Calendarstory Koyomi Tree

September

It's this tree, Brother!

Late September

In the dying days of September, I paid a visit to my sister's dojo.

Well, this sure is a tree.

Leaves quite the impression.

You sure no one noticed it being here until recently?

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Let me retrogradely elaborate.

The incident fell upon me while I was diligently studying for my exams.

Reference

Come on, Brother.

Have some of your favorite boobs.

What is it?

What do you want, Karen?

A fine question!

But I couldn't say it's the right one to ask.

You should be asking, "When should I leave?"

Could you refrain from assuming that I'll drop everything and just go anywhere you ask on a whim?

So remove your colossal breasts from my head this instance and answer my original question:

What do you want?

Wellity, wellity, what could I want indeed?

I have an inkling that you already know the answer, Brother.

Okay.

I don't care what you want anymore.

Just get your massive breasts off my head.

Those gigantesque breasts!

Very well, you win this round.

I called them massive,

but they're not quite at Hanekawa's size.

So, my brother who fondles his sisters' breasts far too much,

time to listen to what I have to say.

Listen here,

I have no idea what ridiculous lies Tsukihi has fed you,

but this time I was in no way, shape, or form responsible.

You acted as an independent party in resting those melons upon my crown.

You were party to the act all the same.

They say that a deity wouldn't knock one being honest,

so be honest about enjoying my divine knockers.

Could you please refrain from mangling proverbs to try and apply them to me in such an uncouth fashion, Karen?

So, what is it? Out with it.

Oh, so you want to hear it? I suppose you've earned that right.

I want you to help me.

My dear Karen.

One cannot simply help another;

all a person can do is find themselves being helped.

Nah, screw that. I ain't buying your bullshit.

Talk shit, get hit!

Now quit with your narcoleptic talk and give me some damn advice, you numbskull!

You cruisin' for a bruisin'?

Okay, I get it.

Black

All right, start talking, and make it quick.

Yipee!

Woo-hoo!

Thanks, Brother! You're the best!

I'll let you sneak a peek at my boobs while we talk.

Peek, peek!

Here.

You can murmur as you feel my leg while you listen.

Check out its hourglass curvature!

You can't tell time with your leg.

You mean slender curvature.

Hourglass curvature

Hourglass curvature

Hourglass curvature

Slender curvature

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Slender curvature

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Slender curvature

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Slender curvature

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Slender curvature

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Slender curvature

Hourglass curvature

Slender curvature

And I won't be murmuring over anything.

I pride myself on my loquacity.

What's your quandary?

It's a tree.

A tree was found at the dojo,

and now everyone's treating it like a hindrance.

So I want to save it.

But I don't really have the means to do so.

Can't you do something?

What's with you? You don't get it?

You're so slow on the uptake!

What do you mean by a tree being found at the dojo?

You mean like those planks you practice moves on?

No! Not at all!

There's a garden behind the dojo.

That's where the tree was found.

I also don't quite get what you mean by it being "found."

Do you mean someone dropped off some lumber or something?

Brother, you don't get it at all!

I didn't say that in the least.

This is all because your head's full of boobs!

And stop looking at your sisters with boobified thoughts!

I do not!

And ignoring my usual comportment,

right now the only thing my head's wrestling with is concern for my sister's welfare!

Thanks for caring about me!

She only hears what she wants to hear.

I don't mean lumber.

And I don't mean the brick-breaking boards.

I mean a real tree that's growing.

One with roots and everything.

Still no good? What don't you get?

Let me get this straight.

So, a tree has been growing in the garden behind the dojo you train at,

but you've never noticed that tree until now?

Not just me.

Everyone.

Nobody at all, including the master of the dojo, noticed that a tree was there for the longest time.

And then the other day I found it there.

It was a big deal.

I mean, no one noticed it was there.

They were all saying stuff like,

"What? What's this tree doing here? Did someone come plant it under cover of darkness or something?"

It was hectic.

That's a pretty spooky story.

Finding a previously unnoticed tree randomly sprouted in the training grounds

you've been using day in, day out for years.

And that's exactly the problem!

Everyone says that!

They call the tree spooky.

Or rather scary, or unsettling.

The head of the dojo isn't concerned, of course.

It's all the undisciplined members who are overreacting. They're all scared shitless.

And what about you?

You didn't find that newfound tree eerie at all?

Not at all!

It had me surprised, but it didn't scare me!

Rather, as a martial artist, I was ashamed of myself that I'd never noticed it before.

Ashamed to the point I considered suicide.

A martial artist's psyche is surprisingly fragile.

And there I was thinking everyone else would've had the same mindset,

but I was wrong.

They didn't think that way at all.

They all just harped on about how scary it was, so it should be cut down.

Owing to our inattentiveness, we never noticed this tree.

We never thought to notice it.

And now that we have noticed it,

isn't it ridiculous that people want it cut down just because they're unsettled by it?

So you want me to reach some kind of arrangement for the tree to not be cut down?

Yeah!

I just want this tree to be able to stay where it is, as it is, forever.

Forever, eh?

All right.

Karen, feel free to leave this in your capable brother's hands.

What exactly are you gonna do?

Oh, I know exactly what to do.

Hanekawa, please tell me exactly what to do!

Hanekawa Tsubasa

Hane kawa

No group

Don't dump this whole thing on me.

I'm supplicating here!

You can do anything you want with your boobs in return!

My breasts are my own to do with as I please.

But I don't mind helping out Karen.

I'd like to start by hearing your thoughts on the matter.

Do you agree with Karen or the rest of the dojo members?

Well, that'd be Karen, obviously.

It's unthinkable to dispose of a still-living tree without good cause.

It isn't really a matter of them not realizing the tree was there,

but rather nobody was cognizant that the tree even existed in the first place.

But once they did notice it was there,

it occupied the forefronts of their minds far more than a tree usually would.

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Like how when you learn a new word, you start noticing it popping up everywhere when you read stuff?

Yeah.

Kinda like that.

Let me just confirm something.

Hanekawa Tsubasa

Hane kawa

No group

Is it safe to say that panic has swept through the dojo like a pandemic?

Saying they're in a panic might be a bit much.

It's more like an irrationality has propagated itself through the group.

Hanekawa Tsubasa

Hane kawa

No group

All we need to do is put a stop to the outbreak.

Well, I guess.

But there's no way to alleviate a pandemic.

That's what I'm struggling with.

Hanekawa Tsubasa

Hane kawa

No group

There is a way to resolve a pandemic.

Huh?

Hanekawa Tsubasa

Hane kawa

No group

Or rather, a way for this pandemic to reach a resolution.

I guess it can't be helped this time.

Now for the epilogue—or rather, the outcome.

I'll start from the final result.

The tree Karen tried so hard to protect avoided getting the axe.

If you want to stop a panic or a pandemic,

if you let it run its course, it'll eventually come to a natural conclusion.

That is to say, an infection only propagates as long as it has viable targets to infect.

Without anything to infect, it'll start to die off.

But we can't let this infection run its course.

Because the natural course of this pandemic would result in the tree getting cut down.

We want to change the final result, so we need to alter its course.

As it stands, everyone thinks of the tree as unsettling.

Or some are even so far gone as to fear it.

So we need to elevate those feelings one step further.

And that'll lead to a different outcome.

Araragi Koyomi

Araragi Koyomi

No group

And what's that further step?

Reverence.

The next day Karen said this to the dojo members:

That old tree spawned from the same tree that was used in the construction of our cherished dojo,

and it was planted in the rear garden to exist as a faithful guardian of this dojo.

And that's what has brought about this phenomenon.

Until now, a god of martial arts had resided in that tree,

hidden away but dutifully watching over its disciples for decades.

But it has finally exhausted its power and revealed its form.

Cutting down such a tree would be blasphemous.

And that's the cover story Hanekawa came up with, and which Karen repeated to the dojo near verbatim.

Taking that as the truth, it's unlikely that harm will ever come to the tree.

Of course, that isn't enough to fool Karen's master as the owner of the dojo.

If you think about it rationally,

there's no way that the lumber used for the dojo and that tree are one and the same.

I'm sure the master won't bring that up, though.

Karen did fulfill her end of the bargain by convincing all the other students, after all.

And so, for the time being at least, that tree has a new lease on life.

Karen managed to safeguard the tree she herself had discovered and swore to protect.

Weaving a false tale does leave a bad taste in my mouth.

You weren't necessarily lying, though.

Hanekawa Tsubasa

Hane kawa

No group

That tree might've been an oddity for all we know.

It's not like there's absolutely no chance that tree sprouted from the same one they used to build the dojo.

Statistically speaking, it's possible.

Hanekawa Tsubasa

Hane kawa

No group

Oh, come on, now.

The odds of that are astronomically small!

Low odds don't infer an absolute impossibility.

And now that we've inextricably linked that interpretation to the tree,

just maybe it has become an oddity.

An oddity that watches over those who train under it.

I kick a stone away to get rid of my worries

I'm downplaying the flutter I feel this April

We were happy children full of curiosity

I was the one who pushed you forward

Let's escape our confines and stop on the way

Let's ride our bikes to far away

carrying our hopes and dreams in the basket

The future we talked about looks nice

The shadows grow longer,

and we are none the wiser