All language subtitles for The Unicorn s01e14_English

Wow. How did Kai get it
all the way up on the roof?

Oh, you know. Five-year-olds--
they're stronger than, uh...

Ben, you got the ladder?Yeah, I got it, man.

All right, Forrest. Here you go.

Why'd you give Kai your wallet?

He said he was gonna do
a magic trick.

Ben? Hello?Yes.

Sorry. Come on down.

I'm waiting
on a call.

I put in a bid to do all the A/V

at that new hotel
they're building downtown.

Good for you.Only if I get it.

We're doing fine,
but I ain't gonna lie.

Lately, it's been
a little lean.

Anyway, I land
this thing,

it's a game changer.WADE:
I get it.

I put in a bid
to do their landscaping,

but they passed.

BEN:
Well, that's life
living contract

to contract,
though, man.

Always waiting
for the next call.

But when it finally

comes through...Ooh, it's glorious.

I don't know, man.
That all sounds terrifying.

That's why
I love HR, man.

Every single day is the same.

Well, I'm glad
that's perfect for you.

Well, it's not
perfect by any means.

I've actually been
pretty frustrated lately.

You guys know
how it is.

We just switched from a
traditional employee

on-boarding system
to a software suite

that integrates payroll,
and it's scalable.

Yeah. That's, uh,
very interesting.

Yeah, the point is, I just have
all this time on my hands now,

and I got all these ideas,
you know?

How about you just walk in
and talk to your boss?

Justin?

Yeah. I mean, yeah,
I'm... I'm gonna.

I have a plan.

What I'm gonna do is, I'm gonna
hang out in the lunch room,

right, and wait
till we "cross paths," you know?

Come on, Forrest. Don't wait
for him to come to you.

Just walk in there and tell him
that you're ready for more.

No, that's not my style.

Well, maybe it's time for you

to change your style.[phone vibrates]

Ooh! Celebrity Home Theater,

where if you can dream it,
we can screen it.

This is Ben speak...

Hey, Mama.

Uh, can I call you back? No, I'm
not disappointed that it's you.

Hey, this gonna
be a while.Mm-hmm. Bye.

FORREST:
Oh.

No. Kai, Kai,
Kai, Kai, Kai. No!

Aw!Damn it!

Wow. That kid's got an arm.

Noah, tell Zoe and Kai
to stop screaming.

On it.

[screaming]:
Stop screaming!

[door closes]

Michelle, I have
a question.

I need an honest answer.

Okay.Are you ready to celebrate?

You got the hotel job?!

I got the hotel job, baby!

Oh, Ben,
that's so good.

It ain't bad.
This is it.

I'm taking my little company
to the next level,

and I'm bringing
everybody with me.

This is great.
We can finally start

a college fund
for all the kids.

Let's take our friends out
for a night on the town,

pull out all the stops.

Or...Okay.

...we could put some
of the stops back in

and just celebrate here.

You know, have all
our friends over.Hmm.

Food Lion is having a
huge sale on chicken thighs.

Chicken thighs?!

Chicken thighs?
Come on, baby.

This is big!

This is like-like steak big.

You want to take everyone out
for a steak dinner?Yes!

I know. You never liked
throwing money around.

But now, we have a couple
dollars to throw around.

So why don't we spend a little?

Okay, this once.

Ah. Mwah.[laughs]

BOTH:
Mmm!

[laughs]
Good for Ben.

You know, he-he really did it.

Yeah, he sure did.
How about you, huh?

Did you talk to your boss?

Yeah, almost.

I saw him, and I was
gonna talk to him, but,

uh, then he finished peeing,
and I was still peeing.

You know how it goes.
The moment kind of passed.

Come on!

Don't wait for the moment.

You make the moment.
You're Forrest.

You're awesome. Just go in there
and show him that.

You know what? Maybe I will.

Maybe... I...

will.

So,

will you?

You know what?
I think I actually might.

Whoa! Isn't this place great?

Look at you, Mr. Fancy.

NOAH:
I'm gonna get

the tomahawk steak.

Oh, you don't want that.

Here's the kid's menu
on the back.

Everything you want
for nine dollars.

Look at that.
Ooh, butter noodles.

Hey, kids, y'all can
get whatever you want.

Thanks, Dad.

Uh, can we get a bottle of
champagne, and also, some, um...

ooh, some calamari
for the table.

We're celebrating big tonight.

DELIA:
As I always say,

you are the Triangle's
number one name

in audio-visual solutions.

Verbatim what it says
on my website.

Oh, that's weird.

WADE:
I think it's great, man.

And I'm not just saying that

'cause I'm about to eat
my bodyweight in steak.[laughs]

Hey, by the way,
Forrest said

that you gave one
heck of a pep talk.

I was happy to do it.
I'm a pretty good salesman

when I believe
in what I'm selling,

and I believe in Forrest.I know.

Oh, speak of the devil.Ah!

Hey!Hi!

There he is. Yeah!Ah!

Hey, everybody. Mwah.Hi. Mwah-mwah.

Oh, God. Sorry I'm
late-- work stuff.

So, how did it go?

Did you talk to him?Yeah, I did. [laughs]

I just went in
there, and I said,

"I'm not being challenged.
I want to do more."

WADE: Yes!Wow. Good for you.

That's how you do it.

I laid out
my very radical plan

for restructuring
the entire department.

I got to tell you, like,

I had it all figured out.

I knew you had it in you.

I really did.

And, um,
a couple hours later,

a security guard comes up,

and he has a cardboard box.

And I'm like,
"What's that for?"

And, uh, he says,
"It's for you

to-to clean out your desk with."

But you know what?
To his credit,

he very gently
escorted me off the premises.

You know, but, I mean,

listen, that's
Alfonso for you.

You know, he's just...

a class act to the end.

DELIA:
Wait.

Did you get fired?Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Yeah, they went with a,
uh, less radical plan

for restructuring
the department.Forrest, oh, my God!

Oh, good, good, good, good.
Champagne. Hmm.

[burps]
Mm. Pardon me.

MICHELLE:
Well, you'll find

another job.

You're good at what you do...
I assume.

I'm not worried about that
at all. No, no, no, no,

no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no. Oh, sir?Yes?

Do you have any champagne
that's a little less bubbly?

I guess
that'd be white wine.

Uh, you know what?

I'll take a Scotch.
Yeah. Actually, no.

Do you have clam juice? Do you
make those, like, Michel...?

What are they called?
Mich-Mich-Micheladas?

No! Scotch.

I'll go with the Scotch.WADE:
Oh, Forrest.

I'm so sorry.No.

Wade, trust me.

No one blames you.

DELIA:
Yeah, Wade.

Nobody blames you.

Hey, where's my Michelada, huh?

Hey, hey, how-how
is he doing?

He's not good, Wade.
He's not good.

I mean, I keep telling him
that we're gonna be fine.

We have our savings.

I'm a pediatrician,

so I'm always
gonna have a job

as long as kids keep eating
things that aren't food.

But he just was really
proud of that job.

You know, it
really defined him.I just feel terrible.

But he was venting about work.
What was I supposed to do?

Listen and nod! Ugh!
That's all he needed.

What is it with you men?

You always want
to fix everything.

Carburetors, the Internet.

Sometimes people
just want to vent.

You know what?
I'm gonna fix this.No! No!

Are you not even hearing what
I'm saying? Is it just "blah"?Yes.

I just-- I want
to help him get a new job.

What do you know
about what he does?

'Cause, I mean,
I barely know.

That's why I refer
to it as "what he does."

You're right, I don't know,

but I do know Forrest,
and he's awesome.

And he would be an asset
to any company that does...

whatever it is that he does.

If you can help him see that,
that'd be great, because

he's really depressed,
which means

he wants to have
sex all the time.

Why are men so horny
when they're depressed?

I don't know if we are.

Well, you are,
and it's weird.Hey, Forrest.

Hey, bud.
How you... how you doing?

Uh, oh, I'm, uh...

uh...

Yeah...

Delia?Yes, sweetie.

Can I see you in the bedroom...

for a second?

Okay.

I have something...

Yup....I'd like to
talk to you about.

No. I understand, honey.

He's really depressed.

WADE:
How's he doing?

DELIA:
I don't know.
He's just...

looking at clouds a lot.Yeah.

Well, I-I couldn't
sleep last night, so,

I started looking

at some job sites
on the Internet,

and there are some really
good ones out there.

I tried to encourage him, but...

Sure, but I was thinking, maybe
we could all do it with him.

Right now.Yeah.

WADE:
Okay.

Résumé and education. Done.

All right.See, Forrest?
You're already halfway there.

Yeah.Cool.

Now we just need
some personal information.

What are your strengths
and weaknesses?

Spanish. You
speak Spanish.

I don't speak Spanish. Ispeak Spanish.

Well, you could still
put that down, right?

That his friend speaks Spanish?

Well, he could
teach Forrest some.

[speaks Spanish]FORREST:
Oh, good.

Yeah, my greatest strength

is knowing a guy
who speaks Spanish.

I'm not gonna type that.Okay.

Say that his biggest fault is

that he's a perfectionist
or workaholic.

Yes. Workaholic.Ooh.

[laughing]: Yeah.Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Yeah, yeah.
That old trick?

"I don't know. My fault is
actually my strength."

Yeah. Saw a lot of that
in the HR game.

Straight to the bottom
of the pile.

Okay. Didn't know that.
Did you know that?

No. No.That's new information.
That's very valuable.

Thank you, Forrest, yeah.Yeah.

Guess it is.

I'm gonna put down
that you are a...

self-starting

go-getter.Go-getter. Right.

You know what you say
to those guys?

Well, then, go get another job,

or self-start...
looking for another job.

We had a ton of jokes
like that.

That is your experience talking.

You know your stuff, Forrest.

Yeah, I should.
I did it for 20 years.

You know what, Wade?
Let me drive.

Get out of there.Okay.

[knocking]GRACE:
Hey, Addie.

I'm sorry
about your dad.

What about my dad?Uh...

Him losing his job.

He lost his job?

Oh, my God.
What are we gonna do?

How did you not know?

I'm so sorry.

Oh, I was just joking.

Of-of course
it's devastating news.

I just handle adversity
with humor.

Oh.

Good one.

Funny.

Goals.

WADE: Wow.Salary range.

Well said.Oh.
Wait.

You forgot to
fill out gender.

No, that's a trap.

Man, you're gonna have, like,
20 interviews in no time.

All right, uh... submit.

[laughter]

Oh, wow.

Guys, I got to admit

I'm buzzing right now!

Hey, Delia, we should go, right?

Why?

Uh, be...

'Cause I have to talk to you...

Oh, yeah...And, um...

Okay.
...in-in

in our bedroom.

DELIA:
Oh, in our bedroom?
Yeah, let's go.

All right, bye, everybody.
Thank you, love you!

Hey, um, am I missing something?

What?He doesn't seem depressed.

Oh, no, he also needs
to have sex when he's

really excited, or, you know,
he's really hungry, or...

It's pretty random, actually,
now that I think about it.

Okay.Okay, thank you.

Yeah.

Hey, babe.
MICHELLE:
Hey.

Would you pass me
the lima beans?

Yeah, yeah, for sure.

Here you go.

What's this?

Oh, Ben, this is beautiful!

Yeah, you like it?I love it!

It-it looks so real.

That's because it is real.

What?

I can't take this.Baby, but you just

said you loved it.I loved it when I
thought it was fake.

But what man gives
his wife a real diamond?

Maybe a man that just got

the biggest contract
of his life.

Let me do something
nice for you.

Come on, now.
I'm not gonna

wear that necklace to Costco

to buy bulk jeans for our kids.

Well, then stop
buying bulk jeans!

Oh, I see, so,
now we're that family

who wears name-brand jeans,
drenched in diamonds?

You've changed, Ben.

Wha...?

You can't really be
drenched in one diamond.

Delia?DELIA: Hi, Wade.

Are you busy?

Actually, yeah, I am.

I'm, uh, I'm about to
meet a client.

I'm sorry, I don't care.

I need you.

Forrest got an interview.

Hey, that's great news.Mm-hmm.

You'd think.

[door closes]It's in an hour.

I don't think he's going.
I-- you know,

I think he's kind of
gone off the rails, Wade.

None of these ties
go with my shirt!

None of them, look!

I got to try on
another shirt now.

Great! You know what, though?

Maybe I should have
a cup of coffee first.

Cup of coffee, Wade?Um...

Deels, cup of coffee?No, thank you.

I'll make a pot of coffee!

I'll just make a pot.

Okay, so it's been
a hard morning.

It took me two hours
to get him into pants.

He's not wearing pants.

I know, Wade!

We backslid a little bit here.

Look, I think he's
looking for any reason to

avoid going to this interview.Delia?

Yes, dear?Where's the coffee?

Oh, you drank all the coffee.

That's okay... that's okay.

'Cause I had a breakthrough
on the shirt thing, so...

Okay, he's gonna
be okay, right?

I mean, he just needs to calm
down and he needs to breathe.

I think he is breathing.

Then Ineed to breathe.

Okay? Somebody needs to breathe

is all I know! [gasps]

It's me, I need to breathe.

All right, look, uh, you
just stay here and breathe.

I'm gonna go talk to him, okay?

Okay.

Just breathe, breathe.

[breathing heavily]

Hey, Forrest.

How you doing, buddy?

Oh, I'm gonna be
honest with you, man.

I'm not great.

Well, what happened?

Yesterday, you were so excited.

Yeah, I was, and then
I got the interview.

And that got
you scared.

I haven't had a job interview
in 20 years, Wade.

20 years.

I had to shave
a ponytail for it.

What if they don't want me?

What if no one wants me?

Oh, Forrest, if anyone
knows how hard it is

to start over, it's me.

And there was a time
not that long ago,

that I was looking for
a hole to crawl into,

never to come out of.

Did you ever find that hole?

No.

Because...

you talked me
out of it.

When I was in my
darkest place,

you never
gave up on me.

You made me realize that

there were people
that cared about me,

and that I could find
a way to move on.

You were relentless.

Yeah, because I knew
you could do it.

Just like I know
that you can do this.

Because the same
amazing people

that helped me

are here to help you.

You're right.

You're right, it's...

It's just a job interview.That's it.

If you guys think I can do it,
then I can do it.

You can do it.
I--

Oh, my God!
Is that the time?

This thing starts
in a half an hour!

Oh, boy...

Forrest!Wade, I got to go, man.

You got to put your pants on.

Yeah, yeah, I'll
get the pants on.

Yeah.

[exhales]

Hey.

Hey.

Babe...

thank you for the necklace.

It's beautiful.

So, you're
gonna keep it?

I can't. It's too much.

It's not that
I don't love it.

But... you know
how I grew up.

But look where
we are now.

We're doing fine.

And the reason why we're
doing fine is for 15 years,

I've been driving across town
for deals on detergent.

You think I enjoy
doing that?
Kind of.

Well, yeah, it is
extremely satisfying.

And I've always appreciated
that about you, baby.

I just always thought
that once we made it,

you could relax
and enjoy things.

Look, the hotel job is great.

And I'm very proud of you.

But in a few months,
the hotel's done, and then what?

Growing up the way I did,
you're always

getting ready for
the other shoe to drop.

So, we're gonna spend our entire
lives waiting on the other shoe?

I want to be able to enjoy the
good times when we have them.

And these are the
good times, baby!

They are.

But I can't enjoy them

if you won't enjoy
them with me.

So, please...

pretty please,
Michelle Taylor,

would you keep
the damn necklace?

It does look amazing on me.So you tried it on?

It doesn't cost anything
to try it on.

Ah, no!

I need to see it.

Mm-mm.

[laughs]

Ooh, yes.

At least tell me
you got it on sale.

What? Baby, you know
I got it on sale.

Mm-hmm, I choose to believe you.

Thank you.

Hi there.

What's up?

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh, what are you doing?

Forrest Klein-McCallum?

Speaking.

But we're not on
the phone, so, uh...

you know, people
say hello-- hello.

[clears throat]

Uh, should I follow you?

Okay.

So, uh, traffic was good.

To my man Forrest
and his new gig.

Cheers, man.Yes, I did it!

I'm back, baby!

MICHELLE:
And...

tonight is on us.Yeah!

No argument.What?

Whoa, are you sure about that?

Yeah, the most expensive

thing on the menu is nine bucks.

BEN:
Ah... oh, hey, baby.

Hmm?
I was thinking.

After tonight,
Mm-hmm.

all of the extra money
I make on this hotel gig,

it's going straight to start
the kids' college funds.

Oh, baby.

I am so proud of you, honey!

Thanks, Deels.Look, I told you,

you had nothing
to worry about.

Now, let's get you
another drink.

Let's get you two because
Ben and Michelle are buying!

Oh!
Ooh!

I'm gonna get you two.It's really on Ben.

[laughs]

So, what exactly
does your dad do?

It's so amazing.

He does performance reviews,

coordinates benefit packages,

conducts conflict mediation.

Man, being an adult blows.

Hey, thanks for
having faith in me.

God, I was just
so freaked out

by the uncertainty
of it all.

But now, I know exactly
what I'm gonna

be doing for
the next 20 years.

[chuckles]Ah, uh, two margaritas.

Because it's the same
thing I've been doing
for the last 20 years.

Yeah, that's, uh,
that's a good thing, right?

It's great.

They have a Karen
in marketing, too.

Their, uh, uh,
break room has,

has Ping-Pong
instead of foosball.

And you know how I feel
about Ping-Pong, but...

I'll get used to it.
The point is...

it won't be a
challenge at all.

Are you... happy?

I don't know.

I was so scared that no one
was gonna give me a job.

But they did, and now...

I'm right back
where I was.

Hmm.

Thank you.
Oh, buddy, I, uh...

Well, I can't tell you
what to do.

Because I'm done
giving you advice.

But I can
tell you this...

life is short.

And it's precious.

And starting over is

hard as hell.

But the good thing
about it

is you can become
something

that you never imagined.

That's some pretty
solid non-advice.

Michelle, that necklace
is so beautiful.

Thanks, it's not real.Baby.

Oh, I'm sorry, it's a reflex.

[laughs]

Delia?What?

My sun, my moon...

Oh, my God,
you're sun-mooning me.

What's going on?

I was so worried that I'd never
get another job in HR,

that I never stopped to think

if I actually wanted one.

Mm-hmm?

I don't know
what's next,

but, uh, I think I'd like

to take a little time
to try and figure it out.

Oh, yeah?

Is that okay?Yeah.

Thank you, Deels. I love you.

Yeah...

just loves those margaritas.

And, thank you, Wade,

for your sage advice.

Yeah. Thank you, Wade.

That-- well, that's,
that's my margarita.

Delia...
Oh, okay.

That's fine,
you can have it.

Mmm. Ah. Wade.

He's a man-- bravo, man!

[chuckles]

Thanks so much
for your help.

Really, I'm just
so glad that I can

see Forrest follow
his dream to...

figure out his dream.

That's fun.

Yeah, I-I am--
Are you, are you okay?

Well, I'm gonna kill you--
is that okay?

So, chew on that.

I'm just kidding.

Relax, buddy.

No, but, seriously,
you're dead to me.

All right, uh,
you're-you're cut off.

Oh, okay,
I'm gonna cut you off.No more, no more margis.

I didn't want to have
more of these with you.

I'm cutting it
off right now.

Forrest?Yeah?

I would like to talk
to you about something

in the car.Absolutely, yeah.

She likes to have sex
when she's enraged.

[chuckles]
I wonder what she's angry at.

All right, let's go.Is that okay?

I'll get the heater on.Is that okay, Wade?

[laughs]

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