Original subtitles

♪

♪ LOOKING FOR LOVE ♪

♪ I'M JUST LOOKING FOR LOVE ♪

♪ I DON'T WANT FORTUNE AND I DON'T WANT FAME ♪

♪ DON'T WANT EVERYBODY TO KNOW MY NAME ♪

♪ YEAH, YEAH, UH-HUH I'M JUST LOOKING FOR LOVE ♪

♪ L-O-V-E, LOVE ♪

♪ I DON'T WANT DIAMONDS AND I DON'T WANT PEARLS ♪

♪ DON'T WANT TO BE THE ENVY OF THE TEENAGE GIRLS ♪

♪ YEAH, YEAH, UH-HUH ♪

♪ I'M JUST LOOKING FOR LOVE ♪

♪ SHE'S JUST LOOKING FOR LOVE ♪

♪ DON'T WANT TO DRIVE IN CONVERTIBLE CARS ♪

♪ OR GO TO WILD PARTIES WITH THE MOVIE STARS ♪

♪ I DON'T WANT TO WEAR FABULOUS FURS ♪

♪ I JUST WANT TOWELS MARKED HIS AND HERS ♪

♪ I DON'T WANT LOTS OF WEALTH UNTOLD ♪

♪ ALL I WANT IS A LITTLE BAND OF GOLD ♪

♪ YEAH, YEAH, UH-HUH ♪

♪ I'M JUST LOOKING FOR LOVE ♪

♪ SHE'S JUST LOOKING FOR LOVE ♪

♪ YEAH, YEAH, I'M JUST LOOKING ♪

♪ UH-HUH, I'M JUST LOOKING ♪

♪ YEAH, YEAH, I'M JUST LOOKING ♪

♪ I'M JUST LOOKING FOR LOVE ♪

♪ DON'T WANT TO DRIVE IN CONVERTIBLE CARS ♪

♪ GO TO WILD PARTIES WITH THE MOVIE STARS ♪

♪ I DON'T WANT TO WEAR FABULOUS FURS ♪

♪ I JUST WANT TO TOWELS MARKED HIS AND HERS ♪

♪ I DON'T WANT LOTS OF WEALTH UNTOLD ♪

♪ ALL I WANT IS A LITTLE BAND OF GOLD ♪

♪ YEAH, YEAH, UH-HUH ♪

♪ I'M JUST LOOKING FOR LOVE ♪

♪ SHE'S JUST LOOKING FOR LOVE ♪

♪ YEAH, YEAH, I'M JUST LOOKING ♪

♪ UH-HUH, I'M JUST LOOKING ♪

♪ YEAH, YEAH, I'M JUST LOOKING ♪

♪ I'M... ♪

♪ JUST LOOKING ♪

♪ FOR LOVE ♪♪

♪

FINE, FINE, GREAT!

THAT'S ALL?

THAT'S WHAT ALL THE OTHER AGENTS SAID.

FINE, FINE, GREAT.

BUT THAT'S ALL. OKAY. I GIVE UP.

GIVE UP? WHAT GIVE UP?

DON'T YOU THINK IT'S ABOUT TIME?

MR. SHAY, I HAVE BEEN IN HOLLYWOOD,

TRYING TO GET IN SHOW BUSINESS FOR OVER A MONTH!

A MONTH?

YES, AND THAT'S ONLY AS A PERFORMER.

SUPPOSE I WANTED TO BE A STAR.

THAT'S WHY I SAID TO MYSELF, "LIBBY,

IF MR. SHAY DOESN'T GO COMPLETELY OUT OF THE SKULL

OVER YOU AND YOU BOOK YOU INTO A JOB SINGING IMMEDIATELY,

THEN TAKE HIS ADVICE AND FORGET IT."

WHAT ADVICE? I DIDN'T SAY...

EITHER WAY, IT'S A RELIEF.

NOW I CAN START TO CONCENTRATE ON MY BIG AMBITION IN LIFE.

OH, WHAT'S THAT?

TO GET MARRIED, AND HAVE BABIES.

THAT'S WHERE MY REAL TALENT LIES.

WOW.

WHAT?

I SAID, IF POSSIBLE,

I'D LIKE A JOB WHERE I CAN MEET A LOT OF MEN.

THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT YOU SAID.

WHY?

WELL, I FIGURE AS LONG AS I'M NOT

GOING TO BE IN SHOW BUSINESS,

THE SOONER I GET MARRIED AND START

HAVING MY BABIES, THE BETTER.

WHAT SORT OF MEN DID YOU HAVE IN MIND?

WELL, MY FIRST CHOICE, MY DREAM MAN,

WOULD BE A DOCTOR. BUT THEY'RE ALL MARRIED

BY THE TIME THEY START PRACTICING.

YOU HAVE TO GO TO COLLEGE AND CATCH THEM WHILE THEY'RE YOUNG.

ANYWAY, THE KIND OF MAN,

THAT'S MY PROBLEM.

YOUR PROBLEM'S GOING TO BE FINDING ME A JOB

WHERE I WON'T GET IN EVERYBODY'S HAIR.

YOU SEE, I'M NOT EQUIPPED TO DO ANYTHING

BUT SING.

I CAN BELIEVE THAT.

WELL, FRANKLY, MS. CARUSO,

UNDER THE CIRCUMSTANCES, I... YES,

I HAVE THE PERFECT PLACE FOR A LITTLE LADY LIKE YOU.

-YOU DO? -YES.

I WANT YOU TO REPORT HERE TOMORROW MORNING,

SEVEN O'CLOCK SHARP.

A BROKERAGE FIRM?

SEVEN O'CLOCK.

THANK YOU.

SELL ME THEIR LOUSY STOCK, WILL THEY?

I STILL DON'T GET IT.

WHY WOULD THEY GIVE YOU A JOB IN A BROKERAGE FIRM?

I DON'T KNOW.

MR. STOWER ACTED LIKE IT WAS THE BEST IDEA HE'S HAD IN AGES.

YOU THINK I'M ALLOWING MYSELF PLENTY OF TIME,

GETTING UP AT SIX?

PLENTY.

YOU SURE THREE ALARMS WILL BE ENOUGH?

I THINK SO.

LUCKY YOU, YOU CAN SLEEP TILL LATE.

NIGHT, JAN.

NIGHT, LIBBY.

♪

♪

OW!

♪

OW!

♪

OH! I'M SORRY, JAN.

I TRIED!

I WISH YOU WOULDN'T TRY SO LOUD.

WELCOME TO MCBRIDE, BANKLESS, PRICE, AND BLUITT, MS...

-MS. CARUSO. -MS. CARUSO, YES.

I'M HARVEY MILLER, THE OFFICE MANAGER.

HOW DO YOU DO?

I'LL EXPLAIN YOUR DUTIES TO YOU.

JUST PUT YOUR THINGS OVER THERE.

THANK YOU.

HEY, THAT'S AN IDEA.

WHAT?

IT'S TOO HEAVY TO LUG AROUND AND I MAKE

TOO MUCH NOISE AS IT IS.

YOU SEE, WHAT I NEED IS SOMETHING TO HANG

MY CLOTHES ON OVERNIGHT,

SO THEY DON'T GET SO WRINKLED. DO YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

I BEG YOUR PARDON?

WHAT DO YOU DO ABOUT YOUR CLOTHES?

OH, YOU HAVE THE SAME PROBLEM, DON'T YOU?

IF I THINK OF ANYTHING, I'LL LET YOU KNOW.

ABOUT MY DUTIES?

YES, THIS WAY.

NOW, IN ADDITION TO SORTING AND FILING TO MAIL,

WE'LL EXPECT YOU TO TAKE OVER THE SWITCHBOARD OCCASIONALLY.

YOU DO KNOW HOW TO RUN ONE?

MS. CARUSO.

NICE.

MS. CARUSO.

VERY NICE.

MS. CARUSO, THIS WAY, PLEASE.

VERY NICE INDEED.

VERY NICE.

MS. JACKSON, MS. CARUSO.

HOW DO YOU DO, MS. JACKSON?

MS. JACKSON HAS BEEN WITH US 37 YEARS.

37 YEARS?

38 NEXT SEPTEMBER.

38? AND YOU'RE STILL SINGLE? I MEAN,

I'M VERY HAPPY TO MEET YOU, MS. JACKSON.

NOTICE, YOU PLUG IN...

MCBRIDE BANKLESS, PRICE, AND BLUITT.

GOOD MORNING.

MS. CARUSO.

38 YEARS AND SHE'S STILL SINGLE?

MS. CARUSO! I'M NOT AT ALL SURE THIS IS GOING TO WORK.

NEITHER AM I. BUT I'LL GIVE IT A TRY.

SO I DECIDED TO STAY ON. YOU KNOW,

AT LEAST GIVE THEM A CHANCE. WHERE ARE THE BROOMS?

WHAT DO YOU WANT WITH A BROOM?

I'M GOING TO INVENT SOMETHING TO HANG CLOTHES ON.

SAY, THAT'S AN IDEA. WHY NOT GO WITH A HANGER?

♪

WHAT'S THE MATTER?

I JUST HAD THE FUNNIEST FEELING.

WHAT?

YOU'LL PROBABLY THINK I'M A NUT,

BUT LIKE SOMETHING IS GOING TO HAPPEN.

LIKE I'M GOING TO MEET HIM. JAN, HOW DO I LOOK?

YOU'RE RIGHT, I DO THINK YOU'RE A NUT.

GO GET YOUR BROOM.

IT'S NOT MY IMAGINATION.

THE FEELING'S TOO STRONG.

TAKE MY WORD FOR IT. SOMETHING IS GOING TO HAPPEN.

♪

WATCH OUT! NO, NO!

♪

OH, NO, IT'S HAPPENING!

IT'S A NIGHTMARE!

I REALLY COULDN'T SEE A THING WHEN I WAS COMING AROUND

WITH THOSE BOXES.

ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?

IT'S OKAY.

YOU SURE?

POSITIVE. NO HARM DONE.

GOOD GRIEF. WHAT IN THE WORLD IS...

-STILL GOT IT. -WHAT?

THAT FEELING THAT SOMETHING'S GOING TO HAPPEN.

HELLO, JAN.

OH, HI PAUL.

THAT'S HIM.

THAT'S WHO? PAUL?

I ALWAYS KNEW I'D KNOW HIM THE MINUTE I SAW HIM.

THAT'S PAUL DAVIS. HE WORKS AT THE OFFICE.

HE DOES? WHAT DOES HE DO?

MOSTLY COMPLAIN ABOUT WASTING HIS TALENT.

HE'S IN PROMOTION.

PROMOTION?

OH, BUT DON'T GIVE HIM A SECOND THOUGHT, HONEY.

HE ONLY LIKES GIRLS WHO ARE TALL AND TOP HEAVY.

WELL, I MAY BE SHORT, BUT I'M NOT EXACTLY...

♪

PERSONALLY, I CAN'T STAND HIM.

YOU CAN'T, HUH?

YOU MEAN YOU HAVE A THING FOR HIM YOURSELF?

CERTAINLY NOT. OF COURSE NOT. NO!

THANK GOODNESS. NO WONDER I HAD THAT FEELING.

WHAT FEELING?

DESTINY.

DESTINY?

ISN'T IT ALL PERFECTLY CLEAR?

NO, NO, NOT AT ALL.

BOY, DO YOU EVER NEED A TON OF BRICKS TO FALL ON YOUR HEAD,

BEFORE YOU GET THE POINT.

NOT AGAIN!

OH, NO!

NO, IT CAN'T BE!

NO!

ISN'T SHE BEAUTIFUL?

GORGEOUS. WHAT IS IT?

MY LADY VALET.

OH, THAT'S WHAT IT IS.

I'M GOING TO PUT THE CLOTHES THAT I WANT TO WEAR TOMORROW

ON THIS TONIGHT.

THEY'LL HANG BEAUTIFULLY, NO WRINKLES OR ANYTHING,

AND IN THE MORNING, I CAN GET DRESSED

WITHOUT MAKING ANY NOISE.

THAT MEANS AN EXTRA HOUR OF SLEEP FOR YOU.

FOR THAT, I'D DO ANYTHING.

WILL YOU INTRODUCE ME TO PAUL?

WHAT DO YOU WANT WITH HIM? YOU MET A DARLING GUY TODAY.

-WHO? CRUZ.

CUZ? CUZ WHO?

COME ON, GIRL. YOU HAVE TWO HEAD-ON COLLISIONS,

PRACTICALLY PUT A SUPERMARKET OUT OF BUSINESS,

AND YOU HAVE THE NERVE TO ASK ME CUZ WHO?

I GUESS HE DIDN'T MAKE MUCH OF AN IMPRESSION ON ME.

AND PAUL DID?

SURE. LOOK HOW CUTE WE MET.

CUTE? HE NEVER EVEN NOTICED YOU.

THAT'S NOT CUTE?

YOU DO HAVE A THING FOR HIM YOURSELF.

I DO NOT. I DON'T EVEN KNOW HIM.

WHY, THERE ARE 207,000 PEOPLE WORKING AT THAT OFFICE.

207,000 PEOPLE LIKE HIM?

NO. AS HE WOULD BE THE FIRST TO ADMIT, HE IS ONE OF A KIND.

THAT'S FOR SURE.

YOU'RE HOPELESS.

HEY, I KNOW.

WHY DON'T WE INVITE HIM TO THE PARTY?

WHAT PARTY?

WE'RE HAVING A SORT OF OPEN HOUSE TOMORROW NIGHT.

YOU KNOW, EVERYBODY BRING THEIR OWN BEER AND COKES.

COME ANYTIME AFTER 7 OR 8.

WHO'S EVERYBODY?

ALL THE KIDS, THE GANG, ANYBODY WE DECIDE TO INVITE.

CID, KATHY, HERB, LINDA,

RIP, PAUL.

DEBBY, JACK.

♪

♪ COME ON, EVERYBODY ♪

♪ LET'S HAVE A PARTY ♪

♪ COME ON, EVERYBODY ♪

♪ LET'S HAVE A PARTY TONIGHT ♪

♪ WE'RE GOING TO HAVE OURSELVES A LOT OF FUN ♪

♪ WE'RE GOING TO SWING UNTIL THE PARTY'S DONE ♪

♪ COME ON AND DIG IT'S A CRAZY SOUND ♪

♪ IT'S THE WILDEST SOUND FOR MILES AROUND ♪

♪ LET'S HAVE A PARTY ♪

♪ COME ON, EVERYBODY ♪

♪ LET'S HAVE A PARTY ♪

♪ LET'S HAVE A PARTY TONIGHT ♪

♪ THERE'LL BE SOME PIZZA IF YOU WANT A SLICE ♪

♪ COME ON BOBBY, JILLY, TRUDY AND JACK ♪

♪ WE'RE GOING TO SING THOSE OLD-TIME SONGS ♪

♪ WE'RE GOING TO RIP IT UP ALL NIGHT LONG ♪

♪ LET'S HAVE A PARTY ♪

♪ COME ON, EVERYBODY ♪

♪ COME ON, EVERYBODY ♪

♪ LET'S HAVE A PARTY TONIGHT ♪

♪ LET ME HEAR IT LIKE IT IS NOW! GO ♪

♪

♪ WE'LL DRINK SOME SODAS AND LEMONADE ♪

♪ LATER ON, WE'RE GOING TO PLAY CHARADES ♪

♪ AND JUST BEFORE IT'S TIME TO GO ♪

♪ WE'RE GOING TO TURN THE LIGHTS WAY DOWN LOW ♪

♪ LET'S HAVE A PARTY, COME ON, EVERYBODY ♪

♪ COME ON, EVERYBODY ♪

♪ LET'S HAVE A PARTY TONIGHT ♪

♪ WE'RE GOING TO RAMP IT TONIGHT ♪

♪ WE'RE GOING TO SWING ALL NIGHT ♪

♪ LET'S HAVE A PARTY TONIGHT ♪♪

♪

♪

CAN I GET THROUGH HERE?

HI, ANGEL!

HI YOURSELF.

BOY, YOU SURE GOT A LOT OF ODDBALLS AROUND HERE.

WE MAKE A SELECTION OF THEM, THAT'S WHY WE INVITED YOU.

HEY, LOOK, BEFORE WE GO ANY FURTHER,

I THINK THERE'S SOMETHING YOU OUGHTA KNOW.

IF THERE'S ONE THING I CAN'T STAND,

IT'S A SMART ALECK BROAD, SO...

I'LL TRY TO REMEMBER.

OH, CUZ RICKOVER, PAUL DAVIS.

CRUZ? -PAUL?

-YEAH, HOW ARE YOU? -FINE, HOW ARE YOU?

GOOD TO SEE YOU. NOW, IF I'M NOT BEING TOO NOSEY,

JUST WHY DID YOU INVITE ME?

I DIDN'T. MY ROOMMATE DID.

I'LL SEE IF I CAN FIND HER.

AIN'T IT A SHAME?

THE MINUTE THEY START TO AGE, THEY GET BITTER.

WHAT'S THAT?

DID SOMEBODY LEFT OVER FROM THE LAST PARTY?

-OH, THIS? -YEAH.

THIS IS LITTLE OLD LIBB'S INVENTION.

-LITTLE OLD WHO? -LIBBY.

THAT'S JAN'S ROOMMATE.

OH, YEAH. WHAT IT SUPPOSED TO BE?

SHE CALLS IT THE LADY VALET.

WHAT ELSE WOULD YOU CALL IT?

THE GIRLS SEEM TO THINK IT'S A KEEN IDEA.

YOU SEE, INSTEAD OF PUTTING THEIR CLOTHES OUT AT NIGHT,

OR SOMETHING, PUT IT ON THIS.

SORT OF LIKE HAVING A LONG, THIN, ANEMIC MAID.

IT DOES HAVE POSSIBILITIES. HAS SHE DONE ANYTHING WITH IT?

LIKE WHAT?

LIKE PUT IT ON THE MARKET?

I DON'T KNOW.

NOW, THIS IS SOMETHING I COULD REALLY PROMOTE.

THIS, I THINK I COULD DO SOMETHING WITH.

WHERE'S WHAT'S HER NAME?

-WHO, LIBBY? -YEAH.

RIGHT THERE.

NO, WAIT A MINUTE.

THERE.

DON'T GO AWAY, SLIM.

I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR YOU!

-YOU HAVE? -YEAH.

IS THERE SOME PLACE TO TALK?

-OUTSIDE! -HUH?

OUTSIDE!

YEAH, I'LL RUN INTERFERENCE.

COME ON.

EXCUSE ME. PARDON ME.

I SAW YOUR INVENTION.

WHAT?

I SAID, I SAW YOUR INVENTION.

SORRY, I STILL COULDN'T HEAR YOU.

-WHAT DID YOU SAY? -I SAID, ONE LOOK.

THAT'S ALL IT TOOK.

ONE LOOK. IT HIT ME.

IT DID? WHY, THAT'S THE VERY SAME REACTION I HAD.

THAT'S WHY I ASKED JAN TO INVITE YOU.

OH, AND SHE TRIED TO TALK YOU OUT OF IT,

-RIGHT, DOLL? -SHE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND.

YEAH, SHE'S LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE DOWN IN THAT PLACE.

THEY THINK I'M A LOT OF NOISE.

ALL I NEED IS ONE CHANCE TO PROVE MYSELF.

YOU DON'T HAVE TO PROVE ANYTHING TO ME, PAUL.

I DON'T KNOW. NOW,

ARE YOU SURE YOU WOULDN'T PREFER SOMEBODY

WITH A LITTLE MORE EXPERIENCE?

DEFINITELY NOT. I'M OLD-FASHIONED.

THERE'S JUST ONE THING.

I'M NOT EXACTLY CRAZY ABOUT THE SHAPE.

YOU'RE NOT?

I SUPPOSE I COULD DO SOME EXERCISES.

YEAH, WELL DON'T WORRY, DEAR. WITH ME HANDLING YOU,

WE ARE HOME. NOW, WHEN I GET THROUGH,

WE ARE GOING TO HAVE SOMETHING THAT LOOKS LIKE SOMETHING.

-NOW, WHAT'S THE MATTER? -NOTHING.

OKAY, THEN I'LL SEE YOU TOMORROW. OKAY, SWEETIE?

SURE, HONEY.

DON'T YOU WANT TO SEAL IT WITH A KISS?

♪

OH, WHAT'S YOUR NAME AGAIN?

LIBBY. LIBBY CARUSO.

LIBBY CARUSO. OKAY.

I'LL TALK TO YOU TOMORROW, OKAY, ANGEL?

JAN, HE LOVES ME. HE REALLY LOVES ME.

WHO? PAUL?

OH, DON'T BE RIDICULOUS.

HE SAID SO. HE TOLD ME.

HE TOLD YOU?

HE CALLED ME DOLL, SWEETIE, ANGEL.

-ANGEL? -THAT'S RIGHT, ANGEL.

AND HE KISSED ME TOO. ONLY NOT ENOUGH FOR BELLS,

ON ACCOUNT OF HE MISSED.

BELLS?

WHEN HE KISSES ME, REALLY KISSES ME,

THEN I'LL HEAR BELLS.

HI!

HI.

DID YOU SEE THAT?

DID YOU SEE THE WAY SHE SMILED AT ME?

YEAH. DID YOU?

HI. HEY, WHERE CAN I FIND WHAT'S HER NAME?

-WHO? -WHAT'S HER NAME, THE HALF-PINT.

LOOK, I'VE BEEN CALLING THE APARTMENT.

THERE'S NO ANSWER, AND THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT.

I GOT TO SET THE DATE.

SET THE DATE? BUT YOU JUST MET HER!

SO WHAT? LOOK, I HAD TO PULL STRINGS

SO WE WOULDN'T HAVE TO WAIT ON THIS.

NOW, JUST A MINUTE. LIBBY IS MY BEST FRIEND,

AND I FEEL RESPONSIBLE FOR HER.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'VE GOT IN YOUR MIND,

BUT IF IT IS IN YOUR MIND, IT CAN'T BE LEGITIMATE.

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

I'M TALKING ABOUT THE TONIGHT SHOW.

THEY'RE ONLY GOING TO BE HERE ON THE COAST FOR A WEEK,

AND I'VE GOT HER SET FOR IT THROUGH THIS GUY I KNOW.

THE TONIGHT SHOW? ON TELEVISION?

JOHNNY CARSON?

YEAH, YEAH.

I'M TRYING TO HELP HER GET THIS LADY VALET OF HERS LAUNCHED.

NOW, ANY KIND OF LUCK, SOME MANUFACTURER WILL SEE IT,

AND WE'LL BE OFF TO THE RACES.

NOW, IS THAT LEGITIMATE ENOUGH FOR YOU?

YOU CAN REACH HER AT WORK.

SWELL.

OH, THE FBI EVER NEEDS ANY HELP,

COULD I TELL THEM ABOUT YOU?

OH, REALLY?

SO, THIS FRIEND OF MINE,

HE TALKED TO THIS FRIEND OF HIS THAT HE KNOWS.

AND THIS FRIEND OF HIS, HE KNOWS A FRIEND,

WHO TALKED TO ANOTHER FRIEND,

TO TALK TO SOMEBODY CONNECTED WITH YOU.

I THINK YOUR MOTHER?

AND THE NEXT THING YOU KNOW, HERE I AM ON THE SHOW.

GOOD OLD MOM.

SEE, MR. CARSON, I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW THRILLED I AM.

YOU KNOW, YOUR SHOW IS MY MOST FAVORITE

WHEN I CAN'T GO TO SLEEP.

I'M THRILLED TO HEAR THAT.

HEY, THIS CRAZY THING YOU HAVE HERE,

THAT LOOKS LIKE A BLIND DATE FOR A MARTIAN,

TELL ME ABOUT THIS, WILL YOU?

THERE'S NOTHING MORE TO TELL.

WHAT? NOTHING? KEEP TALKING, ANGEL.

I REALLY ONLY INVENTED IT SO THAT I COULD HAVE ONE MYSELF.

YOU SEE, WHEN I GAVE UP SHOW BUSINESS,

AND GOT MYSELF A NORMAL JOB,

I DISCOVERED HOW HARD IT IS TO GET DRESSED IN THE MORNING.

LADY VALET MAKES IT EASY.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU GAVE UP SHOW BUSINESS?

WELL, I STARTED OUT TO BE A SINGER.

WHAT KIND OF A KICK IS SHE ON?

BUT I WAS GETTING NOWHERE FAST, SO I GAVE IT UP,

AND I GOT THIS JOB WHERE I WORK NOW,

AT THE MCBRIDE, BANKLESS, PRICE, AND BLUITT BROKERAGE COMPANY.

AND ANOTHER THING, ABOUT THE LADY.

WHAT A SECOND. YOU SAID YOU USED TO BE A SINGER?

I TRIED TO BE.

IT DIDN'T WORK OUT, HUH? WHAT HAPPENED?

WELL, ACCORDING TO ALL OF THE AGENTS WHO LISTENED TO ME,

I HAVE A GOOD VOICE, PHRASE WELL,

A NICE PERSONALITY, I'M CUTE,

BUT OUTSIDE OF THAT, NOTHING.

YOU KNOW SOMETHING, I'D KIND OF LIKE TO HEAR

OUTSIDE OF THAT NOTHING.

HOW ABOUT YOU?

I DIDN'T BRING ANY MUSIC. HEY, I KNOW.

MY FRIEND COULD ACCOMPANY ME.

WHERE'S YOUR FRIEND?

WELL, HE'S RIGHT THERE BACKSTAGE.

ALL RIGHT.

COME ON, CUZ.

UH, DON, YOU'VE BEEN REPLACED.

NO, HE HASN'T. HE HAS.

HE PLAYS THE BASS?

ONLY AS A HOBBY.

MR. CARSON, EVERYBODY, THIS IS MY FRIEND,

CUZ RICKOVER.

♪

♪ TICK TOCK ♪

♪ TICK TOCK ♪

♪ TICK TOCK, WHEN THE CLOCK STRIKES MIDNIGHT ♪

♪ I THINK OF YOU ♪

♪ TICK TOCK ♪

♪ WHEN THE CLOCK STRIKES MIDNIGHT ♪

♪ YOU'RE OUT WITH SOMEONE NEW ♪

♪ I TOSS AND TURN, I NEVER SLEEP ♪

♪ I'M COUNTING TEARS, INSTEAD OF SHEEP ♪

♪ TICK TOCK ♪

♪ WHEN THE STRIKES MIDNIGHT ♪

♪ YOU'VE GOT ME FEELING BLUE ♪

♪ I STILL REMEMBER HOW IT USED TO BE ♪

♪ WHEN THE CLOCK STRUCK MIDNIGHT ♪

♪ YOU WERE KISSING ME ♪

♪ TICK TOCK, WHEN THE CLOCK STRIKES MIDNIGHT ♪

♪ I THINK OF YOU ♪

♪ TICK TOCK ♪

♪ WHEN THE CLOCK STRIKES MIDNIGHT ♪

♪ I WONDER WHAT TO DO ♪

♪ I STILL REMEMBER HOW IT USED TO BE ♪

♪ WHEN THE CLOCK STRUCK MIDNIGHT ♪

♪ YOU WERE KISSING ME ♪

♪ TICK TOCK ♪

♪ WHEN THE CLOCK STRIKES MIDNIGHT ♪

♪ I THINK OF YOU ♪

♪ TICK TOCK, WHEN THE CLOCK STRIKES MIDNIGHT ♪

♪ I WONDER WHAT TO DO ♪

♪ TOMORROW NIGHT, KNOCK ON MY DOOR ♪

♪ AND WE'LL BE HAPPY LIKE BEFORE ♪

♪ TICK TOCK, WHEN THE CLOCK STRIKES MIDNIGHT ♪

♪ I'LL BE KISSING YOU ♪

♪ AND I WON'T BE BLUE ♪

♪ I'LL KNOW WHAT TO DO ♪

♪ WHEN THE CLOCK STRIKES MIDNIGHT ♪♪

ACTUALLY, I WAS MUCH MORE IMPRESSED

WITH THIS YOUNG LADY'S SINGING

THAN I WAS WITH THIS GADGET SHE DREAMED UP.

-GADGET? -OH, IT'S A NICE LITTLE GIMMICK.

BUT MY COMPANY ONLY DEVELOPS NEW PRODUCTS, NOT GIMMICKS.

WELL, THEN I DON'T UNDERSTAND SIR, WHY DID YOU SEND FOR ME?

WELL, THERE'S NO REASON WHY WE CAN'T TALK A LITTLE ABOUT IT,

IS IT?

NOW, WE CAN TALK. BUT BEFORE WE DO, ONE THING.

WHAT'S THAT, MY BOY?

SIR, WOULD YOU STOP PRETENDING YOU'RE NOT INTERESTED,

SO I CAN STOP PRETENDING THAT I'M OVERCONFIDENT,

WHICH IS IMPOSSIBLE TO DO IN THIS CHAIR.

-START FROM SCRATCH. -THANK YOU.

ALL RIGHT, YOU LIKE THE INVENTION?

-MM-HMM. -ALL RIGHT, GOOD.

NOW, I HAVE MADE A COUPLE OF DETAILED SKETCHES.

NOW, YOU'LL NOTICE I'VE SMOOTHED IT OUT A LITTLE BIT HERE,

AND SIMPLIFIED IT A LITTLE BIT THERE, BUT THAT'S ALL.

THIS IS STILL BASICALLY WHAT'S HER NAME'S IDEA.

AND I HAVE PLANNED AN ENTIRE PROMOTION CAMPAIGN.

A LOT OF WORK. LOOKS LIKE A LABOR OF LOVE.

THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT IT IS.

THEN HOW COME YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT'S HER NAME'S NAME?

WHO? OH, I KNOW HER NAME.

OH, NO SIR. NO, NOT THAT KIND OF LOVE.

-NOT WITH HER. -NO?

NO, SIR. SHE'S TOO SHORT.

I'M TRYING TO HELP HER, THAT'S ALL.

AND IT AIN'T EASY.

WHY IS THAT?

WELL, SHE'S SUCH A KID.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH HER.

HER MIND IS ALWAYS...

WOULD YOU BELIEVE THAT HALF THE TIME SHE LOOKS RIGHT AT ME.

SHE DOESN'T HEAR A WORD I'M SAYING.

REALLY?

CONFIDENTIALLY, SIR, SHE NEEDS SOMEBODY

TO WATCH OUT FOR HER INTERESTS.

AND WHAT IS YOUR CUT FOR ALL THIS PROTECTION?

WHAT'S YOUR PIECE OF THE ACTION?

ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

SEE, I FIGURE I DO A GOOD JOB SELLING THIS,

AND I GIVE A GUY LIKE YOU THE IDEA THAT YOUR COMPANY

CAN'T GET ALONG WITHOUT ME.

OH, I SEE.

YOU DON'T WANT A PIECE OF HER ACTION,

YOU WANT A PIECE OF MINE.

WELL, I WOULDN'T TURN DOWN AN OFFER

WITHOUT GIVING IT SOME THOUGHT.

AND I WOULDN'T MAKE AN OFFER WITHOUT GIVING IT SOME THOUGHT.

-OKAY. -OKAY WHAT?

I'VE GIVEN IT SOME THOUGHT.

-YEAH? -I'M GONNA GIVE YOU A CHANCE.

I'LL TAKE ON THE INVENTION, AND YOU.

-AH, MR. FRONT, YOU WON'T-- -BUT GET SOMETHING STRAIGHT.

THE FRONT DEVELOPMENT COMPANY HAS SURVIVED

MANY YEARS WITHOUT YOU.

SIR, I KNOW YOU'VE SURVIVED. I WANT YOU TO PROSPER.

MCBRIDE, BANKLESS, PRICE, AND BLUITT, ONE MOMENT PLEASE.

-HELLO? HELLO? -HELLO, WHO'S THIS?

WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHO'S THIS? WHO'S THIS?

OPERATOR, ARE YOU RINGING OPERATOR?

RINGING WHAT? I'M TRYING TO... HELLO?

THAT YOU, ANGEL? LISTEN, HAVE I GOT GREAT NEWS.

OH, PAUL, I'M HERE ALL ALONE,

AND THIS BOARD IS GOING LIKE CRAZY.

HOLD ON A MINUTE.

ONE MOMENT, PLEASE.

THERE'S ALL THE CALLS FOR THE BROKERAGE,

AND THE STRANGEST PEOPLE ARE CALLING ME!

I'M GOING OUT OF MY EVER-LOVING MIND!

WHAT GREAT NEWS, PAUL?

SWEETIE, TRY TO PAY ATTENTION.

LIBBY, HAVEN'T YOU GOT MY CALL YET?

PLEASE, I'M NOT FINISHED WITH MY OWN CALL YET.

GO ON, PAUL.

MR. FRONT, HE WANTS THE INVENTION.

HE'S GOING TO PUT IT ON THE MARKET,

AND ON OUR TERMS, ANGEL, OUR TERMS!

OH, FABULOUS! HOLD ON.

ANGEL MCBRIDE, BANKLESS, AND BLUITT.

OPERATOR, I HAVE A LONG DISTANCE CALL FOR THIS NUMBER.

OH, LOTS OF LUCK. PAUL, WHAT ELSE?

HE'S AGREED TO LET ME HANDLE THE ENTIRE PROMOTION,

AND THE FIRST THING I HAVE TO DO IS TO GET A BIG STAR

TO ENDORSE THE LADY.

OH, HOW WONDERFUL. HOLD ON.

-YEAH? -MS. CARUSO?

-UH-HUH? -LIBBY? TIGER SHAY.

OH, MR. SHAY, TIGER,

THE MOST WONDERFUL THING'S HAPPENED.

WAIT A MINUTE. YES?

OUTSIDE LINE FOR MR. MCBRIDE.

OUTSIDE, OUTSIDE.

-LIBBY. -I'LL BE RIGHT BACK, TIGER.

-PAUL? PAUL? -LINE FOR MR. MCBRIDE.

PAUL. WHERE'D YOU GO, PAUL?

-ARE YOU RINGING... -PAUL?

MCBRIDE, BANKLESS, PRICE, AND BLUITT.

LIBBY, LISTEN, I CAUGHT YOU ON THAT SHOW LAST NIGHT,

AND I WANT TO TALK TO YOU.

WILL YOU WAIT A MINUTE, TIGER?

PAUL? PAUL?

PAUL?

DO YOU KNOW WHO THIS IS?

THIS IS THE OWNER AND PRESIDENT OF THIS OUTFIT, HORACE MCBRIDE.

OH? DO YOU KNOW WHO THIS IS?

-NO. -GOOD.

LIBBY...

JUST ONE MOMENT. WAIT A MINUTE.

WAIT A MINUTE! WAIT A MINUTE!

SO THERE THEY WERE, MR. MCBRIDE,

MR. MILLER, ALL OF THE BROKERS,

EVERYBODY SCREAMING AT ME, AND THE BOARDS BUZZING,

AND THE LIGHTS BLAZING.

WHAT DID YOU DO?

I DID WHAT ANY OTHER NORMAL, SENSIBLE GIRL WOULD DO

UNDER THE CIRCUMSTANCES. I HAD HYSTERICS.

OH, LIBB, IT'S JUST STAGGERING, IT'S SO EXCITING.

ISN'T IT THOUGH? JUST LIKE THAT,

AND YOUR WHOLE LIFE CHANGES?

NO TELLING HOW MUCH MONEY YOU'LL MAKE.

MONEY? I'M TALKING ABOUT PAUL AND ME,

TONIGHT, OUR FIRST DATE.

BUT I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO MR. FRONT'S TO TALK BUSINESS.

WELL, WE ARE. WE'RE GOING TO BE MEETING SOME OF THE PEOPLE

PAUL WILL BE WORKING WITH, AND DISCUSS WHAT STAR

PAUL'S GOING TO GET TO ENDORSE THE LADY,

AND A MILLION OTHER THINGS.

I'LL BE SEEING A LOT OF HIM NOW. HE DOESN'T HAVE A CHANCE.

NEITHER HAVE YOU, IF YOU'RE GOING

TO KEEP THAT THING BUTTONED UP TO THERE.

I AM SELLING MYSELF AS A POTENTIAL WIFE AND MOTHER.

SWELL, JUST AS LONG AS YOU DON'T LET HIM KNOW

THAT'S WHAT HE'S GETTING.

WELL, THAT'S WHAT I INTEND TO BE.

AND THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I TOLD TIGER.

-WHO? -TIGER SHAY, THE AGENT.

I SAID, "LOOK, TIGER,

I'M NOT INTERESTED IN SHOW BUSINESS ANYMORE,"

AND HE WOULDN'T BELIEVE ME.

WAIT A MINUTE. BACK UP.

TIGER?

TIGER SHAY, THE AGENT.

I SAID, "LOOK, TIGER, I'M NOT INTERESTED

IN SHOW BUSINESS ANYMORE."

HOLD IT, HOLD IT. HE CALLED YOU?

-YEAH. -ABOUT YOUR SINGING?

-MM-HMM. -SO?

SO I SAID, "LOOK, TIGER,

I'M NOT INTERESTED IN SHOW BUSINESS ANYMORE."

YOU SAID NO?

YEAH.

YEAH?

YEAH.

ONE QUESTION.

WHAT HAPPENED TO THE KID WHO CRIED HER EYES OUT

BECAUSE SHE HAD TO GIVE UP SINGING?

OH, JAN, WILL YOU USE YOUR HEAD?

ME?

WHAT DO I NEED WITH SHOW BUSINESS NOW?

I FOUND PAUL.

ALL I WANT TO DO IS CONVINCE HIM THAT I'M WHAT HE NEEDS,

AND THAT HE CAN BE AS SURE OF ME AS I AM OF HIM.

WHAT MAKES YOU THINK YOU CAN BE SURE OF HIM?

THAT'S SOMETHING YOU KNOW HERE. AND WHEN YOU KNOW IT HERE,

YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT ANYTHING

BEING BUTTONED UP TO HERE.

♪

OH, YES,

I'VE BEEN HEAD OF THE PUBLICITY DEPARTMENT

FOR THE FRONT DEVELOPMENT COMPANY,

FOR OVER A YEAR NOW.

THAT'S AMAZING.

CIGARETTE?

AND THEY'RE SO... I MEAN, YOU ARE SO YOUNG.

THANK YOU.

I WAS AFRAID YOU MIGHT NOT LIKE WORKING WITH ME, MR. DAVIS.

SOME MEN ARE VERY UNCOMFORTABLE AROUND CAREER WOMEN, YOU KNOW.

OH, NOT ME.

I ADMIRE A WOMAN WITH BRAINS AND TALENT,

ESPECIALLY ONE WHO'S NOT AFRAID TO SHOW IT.

I'M SO GLAD. AND YOU, MS. CARUSO,

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

OH, I THINK HE'S RIGHT.

YOU'RE CERTAINLY NOT AFRAID TO SHOW IT.

♪

I PLAN TO DESIGN THREE OUTFITS FOR THE LADY VALET

TO USE FOR PUBLICITY PICTURES.

AN AFTERNOON DRESS, A COCKTAIL DRESS,

AND SOMETHING FOR THE BEDROOM.

ACTUALLY, THE CHOICE IS UP TO YOU.

I PREFER THE BEDROOM.

I LIKE THE BEDROOM TOO, MS. LAROW.

MATTER OF FACT, I LIKE YOUR WHOLE APPROACH.

DON'T YOU, LIBB?

WELL, THERE'S CERTAINLY A LOT TO BE SAID FOR IT.

AS YOU CAN SEE, IT WAS A DECISION I HAD TO MAKE

ALL BY MYSELF.

WAS I GOING TO BE CONTENT TO BE A RICH MAN'S DAUGHTER,

IDLY WAITING FOR A RICH MAN'S SON TO COME ALONG AND MARRY ME?

ANOTHER FEMALE WITH NO AIM? NO PURPOSE IN LIFE,

NO MEANING.

OR WAS I GOING TO HAVE THE COURAGE TO GO OUT IN THE WORLD

AND REALLY DO SOMETHING ON MY OWN?

AND THAT'S HOW YOU BECAME A MODEL?

-THAT'S HOW I BECAME A MODEL. -FASCINATING.

WELL, YOU'RE EXACTLY WHO WE'RE GOING TO APPEAL TO

IN OUR ADVERTISING CAMPAIGN TO PROMOTE

THE LADY VALET, MS. DIVINE.

YOU AND ALL THE WOMEN LIKE YOU. THE AMERICAN CAREER WOMEN.

THE WOMEN MEN ADMIRE. THE WOMEN OF TODAY.

THE WOMEN-- HOLD IT.

THE WOMEN WHO DO THINGS.

-THE WOMEN WHO DO THINGS? -YEAH.

THE WOMEN WHO DO THINGS? OH, I LIKE THAT.

SO DO I.

MY BOY, THAT'S GOT A MESSAGE.

DON'T YOU GET THE MESSAGE?

MR. FRONT, I GOT THE MESSAGE THREE HOURS AGO.

♪

WHAT IN THE... WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?

OKAY, SO MAYBE I'M NOT T AND T.

T AND T?

TALL AND TOP HEAVY.

I CAN STILL BE A WOMAN WHO DOES THINGS.

HELLO, TIGER?

I'VE CHANGED MY MIND.

I AM INTERESTED IN SHOW BUSINESS.

♪ FEELING GREAT, FEELING FINE ♪

♪ FEEL LIKE CHAMPAGNE AND WINE ♪

♪ THIS IS MY HAPPIEST MOMENT ♪

♪ THIS IS THE MOMENT I SHINE ♪

♪ MY HEART SIGHS, MY HEART FAINTS ♪

I'M TELLING YOU, YOU'RE NOT TELLING ME.

NOW WAIT A MINUTE.

♪ THIS IS MY HAPPIEST MOMENT ♪

I GOT FIVE DOLLARS IN HARD, COLD CASH,

THAT SAYS YOU'RE WRONG.

ALL RIGHT.

♪ MY HAPPIEST MOMENT ♪

♪ I'M NEVER DONE, I'M NEVER BLUE ♪

♪ THE SKY'S IN VIEW ♪

♪ IT'S TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE ♪

TIGER, YOU DON'T HAVE TO SELL ME ON HER.

I LIKE HER FINE.

YEAH, I KNOW, BUT SHE'S WASTED HERE, HENRY.

WHAT SHE NEEDS IS A BREAK.

I WAS JUST SETTING UP FOR THE DEMONSTRATION,

MS. MIMIO. I SEE THE INTERESTING FEATURE.

WHAT MAKES THE LADY VALET UNIQUE, OF COURSE,

IS THE WAY THAT IT WORKS.

OH, I'M TERRIBLY SORRY. ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?

OH, I DID IT. ARE YOU...

THE DOOR.

THE DOOR?

♪ FEELING GREAT, FEELING FINE ♪

♪ FEEL LIKE CHAMPAGNE AND WINE ♪

♪ THIS IS MY HAPPIEST MOMENT ♪

♪ THIS IS THE MOMENT I SHINE ♪

♪ MY HEART SIGHS, MY HEART SINGS ♪

♪ DREAMING SUCH CRAZY THINGS ♪

♪ THIS IS MY HAPPIEST MOMENT ♪

♪ I COULD FLY TO THE MOON WITHOUT WINGS ♪

♪ I'M IN LOVE ♪

♪ GOT MY CANDLE ALIGHT ♪

♪ I'M THE LUCKIEST ONE UNDER THE SUN ♪

♪ I SEE BLUE, SKY'S IN VIEW ♪

♪ IT'S TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE ♪

♪ THIS IS MY HAPPIEST MOMENT ♪

♪ AND I'M HAPPY TO SHARE IT ♪

SHE'S TOO GOOD FOR THIS JOINT. JUST ONE BREAK.

THAT'S ALL SHE NEEDS. JUST ONE BREAK.

AND ONCE YOU SEE HOW THIS WORKS, MS. PRENTICE,

WE THINK YOU'LL ACTUALLY WANT TO ENDORSE THE INVENTION.

WHAT DO YOU CALL IT?

WHAT DO WE-- WE CALL THIS THE LADY VALET.

NOW, YOU'LL NOTICE AN INTERESTING--

OH, I'M SORRY MS. PRENTICE.

EXCUSE ME.

SIT DOWN. I THINK I GOT YOU RIGHT IN THE MOUTH, HUH?

-YEAH, I'LL SAY. -YOU ALL RIGHT?

GET OUT OF HERE, WOULD YOU?

♪ FEELING GREAT, FEELING FINE ♪

♪ FEEL LIKE CHAMPAGNE AND WINE ♪

♪ THIS IS MY HAPPIEST MOMENT ♪

♪ THIS IS THE MOMENT I SHINE ♪

♪ MY HEART SIGHS, MY HEART SINGS ♪

♪ DREAMING SUCH CRAZY THINGS ♪

♪ THIS IS MY HAPPIEST MOMENT ♪

♪ I COULD FLY TO THE MOON WITHOUT WINGS ♪

IF ONLY THE KID COULD GET A REAL BREAK.

OH, MY ANKLE!

MS. SWINGER.

I'M SORRY, MS. SWINGER.

DID IT BREAK?

WHAT A BREAK! WHAT A BREAK.

I STILL DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW IT HAPPENED.

WHO CARES? GAYE SWINGER BREAKS A LEG,

LIBB GETS HER BIG CHANCE AT SHOW BUSINESS, I THINK.

♪ DA DA DA, DA DA DA DA DA DA ♪

PLEASE, MS. CARUSO, STAND STILL.

♪ DA DA DA, DA DA DA DA DA DA ♪

HOLD IT, HOLD IT.

JUST A MOMENT. I'M SO CONFUSED.

HOW ARE YOU DOING, HUN?

OH, ALL THESE MOVES.

IF I COULD JUST TRY IT ONCE,

ON STAGE WITH THE PROPS, THE DANCERS, THE SET.

LIBB, WE JUST DON'T HAVE THE TIME.

IF THERE'D BEEN THE TIME, WE'D HAVE GOTTEN DIANA SHAWL.

AND I WOULDN'T HAVE TO SHORTEN THIS HEM.

THANKS A LOT.

LIBB, YOU'VE GOT TO DO IT.

I DON'T KNOW HOW ELSE I COULD GET YOU

ON A BIG SPECIAL LIKE THIS, WITH DANNY THOMAS.

PAUL CAN'T MISS SEEING ME, CAN HE?

HE'LL SEE IT IF I HAVE TO GLUE HIM TO THE SET.

THE MOST MISERABLE DAY OF MY LIFE,

AND YOU WANT ME TO WATCH A TELEVISION SHOW.

NOBODY'S INTERESTED IN YOUR MISERY.

WELL, YOU WILL BE. EVERYBODY WILL BE,

UNLESS I CAN MAKE IT UP TO HER SOMEHOW.

MAKE IT UP TO WHO?

DON'T EVEN ASK.

ASK? I COULDN'T CARE LESS.

HEY, JAN, I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU,

I CAN'T STAND A SMART ALECK BROAD.

YOU DID, AND IT WORRIES ME SOMETHING AWFUL.

THE ONLY IMPORTANT THING TONIGHT IS LIBB.

WHO?

WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO START REMEMBERING HER NAME, SAM?

WHOSE NAME, GERTRUDE?

YOU MAKE ME SO MAD.

DID ANYBODY EVER TELL YOU THAT WHEN YOU GET ANGRY,

YOU LOOK PRETTY AWFUL?

SHUT UP AND WATCH LIBB.

THAT'S THE SURPRISE.

SHE'S REPLACING GAYE SWINGER ON THE BIG SHOW

DANNY THOMAS IS DOING TONIGHT.

LIBB...

IS REPLACING...

GAYE SWINGER. YEAH, SHE BROKE HER LEG,

OR SPRAINED HER ANKLE, OR SOMETHING. I DON'T KNOW.

GAYE SWINGER?

YEAH.

OKAY, THANK YOU. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

YOU'RE A WONDERFUL AUDIENCE, AND I'VE GOT

A LITTLE SURPRISE FOR YOU.

A YOUNG LADY THAT'S REALLY DOING US

A FAVOR TONIGHT AND FILLING IN.

I HADN'T MET HER BEFORE TONIGHT, AND TO BE HONEST WITH YOU,

I HAVE NEVER HEARD HER SING.

BUT MY PAL JOHNNY CARSON TELLS ME SHE'S GREAT,

AND THAT'S CERTAINLY GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME.

HOW ABOUT A NICE, WARM WELCOME FOR YOUNG MS. LIBBY CARUSO.

♪

♪ BE MY LOVE ♪

♪ FOR NO ONE ELSE CAN HEAL THIS YEARNING ♪

♪ THIS NEED THAT YOU ♪

♪ AND YOU ALONE CREATE ♪

♪ JUST FILL MY ARMS ♪

♪ THE WAY YOU FILL MY DREAMS ♪

♪ THE DREAMS THAT YOU INSPIRE ♪

♪ WITH EVERY SWEET DESIRE ♪

♪ BE MY LOVE ♪

♪ AND WITH YOUR KISSES ♪

♪ SEND ME BURNING ♪

♪ ONE KISS IS ALL I NEED TO SEAL MY FATE ♪

♪ AND HAND-IN-HAND ♪

♪ WE'LL FIND LOVE'S PROMISED LAND ♪

♪ THERE'LL BE NO ONE BUT YOU FOR ME ♪

♪ ETERNALLY ♪

♪ IF YOU WILL BE MY LOVE ♪

♪ BE MY LOVE ♪

♪ FOR NO ONE ELSE CAN HEAL THIS YEARNING ♪

♪ BURNING WITH A FIRE, LOVELY FIRE ♪

♪ ONE SPARK CAN AWAKEN ♪

♪ OH, PLEASE TAKE ME ♪

♪ TAKE ME, TAKE ME ♪

♪ HAND-IN-HAND ♪

♪ WE'LL FIND LOVE'S PROMISED LAND ♪

♪ THERE'LL BE NO ONE BUT YOU FOR ME ♪

♪ ETERNALLY ♪

♪ IF YOU WILL BE ♪

♪ MY LOVE, LOVE ♪♪

HELP! SOMEBODY, HELP!

HEY, HEY! NO!

PLEASE! SOMEBODY, LET ME DOWN!

OH! PLEASE!

WAIT A MINUTE! WAIT A MINUTE!

WAIT A MINUTE! I DON'T MIND A FIGHT.

I DON'T MIND A STRUGGLE.

I DON'T EVEN MIND A KNOCKDOWN DRAG-OUT BATTLE,

BUT A WAR?

THAT WAS A VERY NICE THING YOU JUST DID.

OH, BOY.

WELL, SUPPOSE YOU JUST SING NOW, HUH?

MR. THOMAS, YOU MEAN WE'RE STILL ON THE AIR?

HONEY, I THINK WE JUST PICKED UP THE BIGGEST AUDIENCE

IN THE HISTORY OF TELEVISION.

COME OVER HERE, AND SIT DOWN.

SIT DOWN RIGHT HERE, AND SING A SONG FOR EVERYBODY,

BECAUSE I KNOW YOU GOT A REAL NICE VOICE.

NOW, WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE SONG?

THAT'S A NICE SONG.

IF MY SPONSOR IS WATCHING, THIS IS ONLY A REHEARSAL.

OH, BOY.

WALLY, A LITTLE SOMETHING IN A FLAT, HUH?

♪

♪ YOUR EYES ARE BLUE ♪

♪ YOUR KISSES TOO ♪

♪ I NEVER KNEW WHAT THEY COULD DO ♪

♪ I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH... ♪

WIPE THE TEARDROP FROM YOUR EYE.

IF YOU HAD A NOSE LIKE MINE, THEN YOU CRY.

♪ YOU'RE TELLING EVERYONE I KNOW I'M ON YOUR MIND ♪

♪ EACH PLACE YOU GO ♪

♪ THEY CAN'T BELIEVE THAT YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH ME ♪

YOU KNOW THIS SONG?

COME ON, SING IT WITH ME.

♪ I HAVE ALWAYS PLACED YOU... ♪

♪ FAR ABOVE ME ♪

♪ I JUST CAN'T IMAGINE... ♪

♪ THAT YOU REALLY LOVE ME ♪

♪ AND AFTER ALL IS SAID AND DONE ♪

♪ TO THINK THAT I'M THE LUCKY ONE ♪

♪ I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT YOU'RE IN LOVE ♪

♪ WITH ME ♪

IF I WAS SINGLE AND FANCY FREE,

YOU'D BE THE ONLY GIRL FOR ME.

♪ I HAVE ALWAYS PLACED YOU ♪

♪ SO VERY FAR ABOVE ME ♪

HEY, THAT'S GOOD.

♪ I JUST CAN'T IMAGINE ♪

♪ THAT YOU LOVE ME ♪

CAN YOU SING HARMONY?

I'LL TRY.

COME ON, LET'S GIVE IT A GO!

♪ SO AFTER ALL IS SAID AND DONE ♪

♪ TO THINK THAT I'M THE LUCKY ONE ♪

♪ I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT YOU'RE IN LOVE ♪

♪ I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT YOU'RE IN LOVE ♪

♪ I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT YOU'RE IN LOVE ♪

♪ WITH ME ♪♪

♪

MILTON, DOLL FACE,

WHAT DO YOU THINK, YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE THAT WANTS HER?

I'VE GOT MORE OFFERS FOR THE KID NOW THAN I CAN HANDLE.

I'M SORRY, PAL, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO STAND IN LINE.

NOW, THAT'S THE KIND OF THING THAT MAKES

AN AGENT'S LIFE WORTHWHILE.

LISTEN, YOU THINK YOU'VE BEEN BUSY?

YOU THINK YOU'VE BEEN ON A MERRY GO-ROUND

THE LAST COUPLE OF WEEKS? THAT'S NOTHING.

WAIT TILL YOU SEE WHAT I GOT LINED UP.

WELL, THAT'S WHAT I CAME TO SEE YOU ABOUT, TIGER.

PLAYING ALL THE DATES, THE TV SHOWS, THE NIGHTCLUBS,

EVERYTHING. IT'S BEEN WONDERFUL, A DREAM.

BUT IT'S BEGINNING TO GET A LITTLE OUT OF HAND.

I'M GOING TO HAVE TO CALL A HALT.

CALL A HALT?

-WHY? -WHY?

BECAUSE IT'S INTERFERING WITH MY JOB AT THE BROKERAGE,

THAT'S WHY.

OH, THAT EXPLAINS A LOT.

SO I GAVE UP MY JOB AT THE SWITCHBOARD,

BUT I INSISTED ON TWO-WEEKS NOTICE.

YOU MEAN THE BROKERAGE DID?

I DID. THEY DIDN'T WANT ANY NOTICE AT ALL.

I STILL THINK MR. FRONT SHOULD BE GIVING THIS PARTY

IN YOUR HONOR, NOT GAYE SWINGER.

YEAH, YOU'D THINK SHE INVENTED THE LADY VALET.

WELL, SHE'S ENDORSING IT, WHICH IS MUCH MORE IMPORTANT.

DOES THIS STRIKE ANYBODY ELSE AS AN ODD COINCIDENCE?

GAYE SWINGER, OF ALL PEOPLE.

IT CERTAINLY DOES.

DID PAUL EVER EXPLAIN HOW HE CONNECTED WITH HER?

I FIGURED MAYBE SEEING ME ON THE SHOW

REPLACING HER IS WHAT GAVE HIM THE IDEA.

ANYWAY, I HAVEN'T SEEN HIM TO ASK.

HE'S BEEN SO BUSY.

WELL, GIVE THE MAN CREDIT.

IF ALL I HEAR AND READ ABOUT GAYE SWINGER IS TRUE,

HE'S CERTAINLY FOUND A WOMAN WHO DOES THINGS.

OH, THE INVENTION, OF COURSE.

HOW COULD I FORGET?

ISN'T THAT WHAT BOUGHT US TOGETHER?

YEAH, WELL THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN TRYING TO EXPLAIN.

THAT WAS WHAT BOUGHT US TOGETHER, NOW WASN'T IT?

THAT AND THIS CUTE, FUNNY, LITTLE MISHAP?

YEAH.

EXCEPT THERE ARE

A COUPLE OF THINGS I THINK I OUGHT TO EXPLAIN TO YOU,

BEFORE WE GET TO THE PARTY.

NOW, IF YOU'D ONLY LISTEN.

YOU SEE, I HAVE THIS GIRL...

WON'T LISTEN? I'M ALL EARS, POOPSY.

ALL EARS!

WELL, I HAVE THIS GIRLFRIEND--

♪ LA DA DA DA DA LA DA DA DA DA ♪

♪ LA DA DA DA DA LA DA DA ♪

OH, PLEASE, DEAR.

COME ON, REALLY SING FOR US.

NO, THIS IS GAYE SWINGER'S NIGHT.

BOY, THIS KIND OF LIFE IS STARTING TO GET ME, I TELL YOU.

THANKS.

TOO MUCH BASS PLAYING.

A LITTLE TOO MUCH HOP-KNOBBING WITH THE ELITE.

YOU'RE DOING MUCH BETTER AT PLAYING FOR LIBB

THAN YOU EVER DID HAULING GROCERIES AROUND,

-AREN'T YOU? -YEAH.

LET'S SAY I DON'T LIKE THE HOURS.

WHAT DIFFERENCE DO THE HOURS MAKE?

SLEEP DURING THE DAY.

UNFORTUNATELY, I ALSO SLEEP DURING CLASS.

CLASS?

UCLA.

WHY, CUZ, YOU NEVER SAID ANYTHING ABOUT GOING TO COLLEGE.

WELL, YOU NEVER ASKED. ANYWAY, I'M VERY DEEP.

HAVEN'T YOU NOTICED?

YES, I'VE NOTICED.

I WISH I COULD SAY THE SAME THING ABOUT YOUR GIRLFRIEND

OVER THERE.

PERSONALLY,

I'D JUMP OVER 18 PAUL DAVISES FOR ONE OF YOU.

-YOU WOULD? -YEAH, SURE.

IF I WERE LIBB, I WOULD.

YOU DON'T DIG PAUL?

NO. WELL, I'LL ADMIT, HE IS SLIGHTLY ATTRACTIVE,

IF YOU HAPPEN TO GO FOR THAT TYPE, WHICH I DON'T.

AND HE DOES HAVE A CERTAIN CHARM,

IF YOU HAPPEN NOT TO SEE THROUGH IT,

WHICH I DO. SO HE'S TALL.

SINCE WHEN DOES A FELLA BEING TALL MEAN...

WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT?

WELCOME TO THE CLUB, SWEETIE.

AW, NO. YOU'RE WRONG.

YOU'RE ALL WRONG. OH, YOU'RE WAY OFF BASE.

NO SIREE, BUD. TAKE IT FROM ME,

YOU ARE ALL WRONG.

SORRY. YEAH, MY MISTAKE.

WELL, WELL, THIS IS WHAT I CONSIDER

A MOMENT WORTH WAITING FOR.

COME IN, COME IN.

MS. SWINGER, I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW,

I DEEM IT A GREAT PERSONAL PRIVILEGE TO HAVE YOU HERE.

OH, THANKS, SWEETIE. YOU'RE SWEET.

ISN'T HE SWEET? WHO IS HE AND WHERE ARE WE?

OH, MS. SWINGER, I AM THRILLED.

WHAT'S THIS, THE CHILDREN'S HOUR?

NO, THIS IS ONE OF THE LITTLE DETAILS...

MS. CARUSO IS THE CLEVER YOUNG WOMAN

WHO INVENTED THE LADY VALET.

GOODY TWO SHOES FOR YOU. NOW,

WHO DO YOU HAVE TO KNOW TO GET A BELT AROUND HERE?

A BELT?

A BELT. A BOOZE.

OH, THERE'S A WHOLE GANG OF BOOZE, RIGHT OVER HERE.

INVENTED WHAT?

THE LADY VALET.

OH, THE WHO'S I'M SUPPOSED TO WHAT-YOU-MA-CALL-IT?

YEAH, YOU SEE...

HEY, YOU DIDN'T TELL ME A GIRL INVENTED IT.

WELL, THAT'S ONE OF THE LITTLE DETAILS I WANTED TO...

WELL, WHAT DID SAY YOUR NAME WAS AGAIN, HUN?

CARUSO.

CARUSO. ISN'T THERE A SINGER BY THAT NAME?

YES, BUT HE'S BEEN DEAD FOR A LONG TIME NOW.

WHAT WAS HIS FIRST NAME AGAIN?

ENRICO, ITALIAN FELLA. HAD A BEAUTIFUL VOICE.

YEAH, NEVER MIND HIS FIRST NAME.

WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST NAME AGAIN?

-LIBBY. -LIBBY CARUSO.

HAVEN'T I SEEN YOU SOMEWHERE BEFORE?

I DON'T KNOW, BUT I'VE SEEN YOU.

MS. SWINGER, I HAVE WATCHED YOU ON TELEVISION,

AND IN THE MOVIES, EVER SINCE I WAS A TINY--

-HOLD IT. -BEAUTIFUL.

I DON'T WANT TO START HITTING ANYBODY YET.

YOU REPLACED ME ON THE DANNY THOMAS SHOW, TRUE?

-TRUE, BUT THAT WAS-- -YOU'VE ALSO BEEN A SMASH HIT

-EVER SINCE. ALSO TRUE? -I WOULDN'T SAY THAT.

AND YOU INVENTED THIS GIMMICK THAT I'M SUPPOSED

TO PUT MY NAME ON?

WELL, YES, BUT THAT WAS--

OKAY. ONE LAST QUESTION.

WHO'S SPREADING THE WORD AROUND THAT I'M STUPID?

-OH, MS. SWINGER. -YOU'RE BRILLIANT.

I SHOULDN'T ENDORSE ANYTHING FOR HER,

WHEN SHE'S PROBABLY GOING TO KNOCK ME OUT OF THE BOX.

OH, YOU CAN BE FUNNIER THAN THAT, SONNY BOY.

OH, LOOK, MS. SONNY BOY,

MS. SWINGER, SHE'S NOT GOING TO KNOCK YOU OUT OF THE BOX.

SHE'S NOBODY. SHE'S A FLUKE.

SHE'S A LITTLE KID. THE DANNY THOMAS SHOW

WAS STRICTLY A ONE-SHOT DEAL, AN ACCIDENT.

YEAH? WELL GET YOUR ACCIDENT TO ENDORSE HER OWN PRODUCTS,

BUDDY BOY.

INCIDENTALLY, JUNIOR, I'M SUING YOU FOR MINE.

MS. SWINGER,

I'D BE VERY HAPPY TO TAKE CARE OF ALL

THE MEDICAL...

HONEST TO GOD, LIBBY,

YOU MAKE ME SO...

WHO'S A FLUKE?

WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH HER?

WHO'S A NOBODY? A ONE-SHOT?

A...

-A LITTLE KID. -A LITTLE--

DID HE CALL ME A LITTLE KID?

WELL, THAT SHOWS JUST HOW MUCH YOU KNOW, SONNY BOY.

I AM NOT A LITTLE KID, BUT I'LL TELL YOU WHAT I AM.

I'M AN IDIOT, THAT'S WHAT I AM.

A DUM-DUM, A YO-YO.

AS A MATTER OF FACT,

I AM UNDOUBTEDLY THE BIGGEST YO-YO OF ALL TIMES.

STEP ASIDE, JUNIOR.

WHAT WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?

SHE'S WRONG. SHE ISN'T THE BIGGEST YO-YO OF ALL TIME.

YOU ARE.

CAN I HAVE A FEW THOUSAND WORDS WITH YOU?

I DON'T THINK WE MEAN THE SAME THING WHEN WE SAY PROSPER.

GO AHEAD, SWEETIE, CRY YOUR EYES OUT.

-YOU'RE ENTITLED. -I'M ALL RIGHT.

POOR KID.

SOME DAY YOU'LL REALIZE THAT YOU ONLY THOUGHT

YOU WERE IN LOVE WITH THAT BIG GALLOOT.

YOU KNOW WHY?

BECAUSE HE DIDN'T GIVE YOU A TUMBLE, THAT'S WHY.

THE OLD HARD-TO-GET ROUTINE GETS THEM EVERY TIME.

NOBODY WANTS ANYTHING UNLESS THEY THINK THEY CAN'T HAVE IT.

WE'RE ALL THE SAME.

IF IT ISN'T HARD TO GET,

AGAINST THE LAW, OR FATTENING,

WE'RE NOT INTERESTED.

-JAN? -WHAT?

YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY TOTALLY RIGHT.

-I AM? -CERTAINLY.

ALL ALONG I'VE BEEN USING THE WRONG APPROACH.

WRONG APPROACH?

OH MY DEAR CHILD.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS IS ALL ABOUT,

BUT WHATEVER IT IS, TAKE MY ADVICE,

AND STAY OUT OF IT.

-REALLY? -REALLY.

WITH AN ANGEL VOICE LIKE HERS, ALL SHE EVER

HAS TO DO IN LIFE IS SING.

SING?

SING WHEN YOU'RE HAPPY. SING WHEN YOU'RE SAD.

OH MY DEAR, EVERYBODY'S DYING TO HEAR YOU.

PLEASE, SHE'S UPSET. SHE CAN'T SING.

WHO CAN'T SING?

I'VE NEVER FELT MORE LIKE SINGING IN MY LIFE.

♪

YOU KNOW SOMETHING? SHE'S RIGHT.

ALL ALONG, WE'VE BOTH BEEN USING THE WRONG APPROACH.

♪

♪ I'VE GOT FORTUNE, I'VE GOT FAME ♪

♪ EVERYBODY IN THE WORLD KNOWS MY NAME ♪

♪ YEAH, YEAH, UH-HUH ♪

♪ BUT I'M JUST LOOKING FOR LOVE ♪

♪ I'VE GOT DIAMONDS, I'VE GOT PEARLS ♪

♪ I'M THE ENVY OF THE TEENAGE GIRLS ♪

♪ YEAH, YEAH, UH-HUH ♪

♪ BUT I'M JUST LOOKING FOR LOVE ♪

♪ I DRIVE AROUND IN CONVERTIBLE CARS ♪

♪ GO TO WILD PARTIES WITH THE MOVIE STARS ♪

♪ I GET TO WEAR FABULOUS FURS ♪

♪ BUT I DON'T HAVE TOWELS MARKED HIS AND HERS ♪

♪ I'LL BE LUCKY AS A GIRL CAN BE ♪

♪ WHEN THAT SAID MAN COMES LOOKING FOR ME ♪

♪ YEAH, YEAH, UH-HUH ♪

♪ I'M JUST LOOKING FOR LOVE ♪

♪ OH YEAH, I'M JUST LOOKING FOR LOVE ♪

♪ YEAH, YEAH, I'M JUST LOOKING FOR... ♪

♪ I DRIVE AROUND IN CONVERTIBLE CARS ♪

♪ I GO TO WILD PARTIES WITH THE MOVIE STARS ♪

♪ I GET TO WEAR FABULOUS FURS ♪

♪ BUT I DON'T HAVE TOWELS MARKED HIS AND HERS ♪

♪ WHO NEEDS ALL OF THIS WEALTH UNTOLD ♪

♪ ALL I NEED IS A LITTLE BAND OF GOLD ♪

♪ YEAH, YEAH, UH-HUH ♪

♪ BIG BOY, I'M JUST LOOKING FOR... ♪

♪ BIG BOY, I KNOW WHAT'S COOKING FOR ♪

♪ BIG BOY... ♪

NOW, WHAT MAKES HER THINK SHE'S A YO-YO?

♪ I'M LOOKING FOR

LOVE ♪♪

WHAT DO YOU MEAN MS. CARUSO ISN'T AVAILABLE?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS BIT?

AND WHO IS THIS ANYWAY? HER ANSWERING SERVICE?

WHY DON'T I WHAT?

WHY DON'T I SEND HER A WIRE, OR WRITE HER A LETTER OR SOMETHING?

SAY, THAT'S AN EXCELLENT SUGGESTION,

YEAH. NOW I'VE GOT ONE FOR YOU.

AND I GOT ONE FOR YOU, BOY. WHY DON'T YOU COOL IT?

ALL RIGHT, SO YOUR GIRL WON'T TALK TO YOU.

WHAT YOU SHOULD DO...

I KEEP TELLING YOU, SHE IS NOT MY GIRL.

IN THE FIRST PLACE, SHE IS TOO SHORT.

WAY TOO SHORT. AND IN THE SECOND PLACE,

SHE'S GOT A CASE ON ME, AND I'M JUST TRYING

TO HELP HER GET OVER IT, THAT'S ALL.

GET OVER IT? WELL, ACCORDING TO THE GOSSIP COLUMNS--

WHAT, YOU BELIEVE THAT? THAT PUBLICITY?

OH, LOOK, MR. FRONT,

NO GIRL COULD BE OUT THAT MANY TIMES WITH THAT MANY GUYS.

AND EVEN IF SHE WERE TALLER, WHICH SHE ISN'T.

SHE'S TOO SHORT, LIKE I KEEP TELLING YOU.

AND I KEEP HEARING YOU. WAY TOO SHORT.

MAYBE SHE'S AT THE PHOTOGRAPHER'S.

WASN'T SHE GOING TO POSE FOR THE ADS FOR THE LADY VALET TODAY?

YEAH, EITHER THAT, OR DO HER SCREEN TEST.

SCREEN TEST?

YES.

SHE'S GOING TO BE A MOVIE STAR?

WHY NOT?

LOOK, MR. FRONT,

I THOUGHT WE WERE STRETCHING IT, JUST A BIT,

WHEN WE LET THE KID ENDORSE HER OWN PRODUCT.

SO THEN SHE CUTS A RECORD.

SO THEN SHE DOES A COUPLE OF TELEVISION SHOWS...

SO THEY WANT THE KID IN LAS VEGAS.

SO THE KID IS GETTING OFFERS FROM EVERYBODY.

SO I CAN'T THINK OF ANYBODY BETTER TO ENDORSE

THE LADY VALET THAN THE KID.

RIGHT. ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, SIR.

YES, I WENT ALONG WITH IT, DIDN'T I?

HELLO, IS MS. CARUSO THERE, PLEASE?

PAUL DAVIS, WHO'S THIS?

HER WHAT? HER SECRETARY?

THERE ARE NO STRAIGHT MEN LEFT. EVERYBODY'S A COMEDIAN.

HE SAYS EVERYBODY'S A COMEDIAN.

DID YOU WISH TO MAKE AN APPOINTMENT?

ALL RIGHT, JAN, QUIT HORSING AROUND.

OH, I DON'T SEE HOW SHE'LL HAVE THE TIME TO TALK TO YOU TODAY.

PERHAPS WE COULD SQUEEZE IN YOUR CALL TOMORROW.

OH YEAH, WELL YOU CAN TELL HER FOR ME...

YOU WATCH YOUR LANGUAGE, BUSTER.

WHAT DID HE SAY?

NOT IN FRONT OF TIGER.

NOW LOOK KIDS, FUN IS FUN, BUT LET'S STOP KIDDING AROUND.

WE GOT DEALS TO MAKE.

AND I CAN'T HOLD EVERYBODY OFF INDEFINITELY.

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO, LIBB?

I DON'T KNOW, TIGER.

I CAN'T MAKE UP MY MIND UNTIL I HAVE THINGS SETTLED WITH PAUL.

WELL, DO YOU WANT ME TO SIGN THE CONTRACTS,

AND THEN RUN OFF AND GET MARRIED,

AND QUIT?

CHIN, SWEETIE, THE CHIN.

WHAT'S WRONG WITH GETTING MARRIED AND HAVING YOUR CAREER?

YOU CAN'T HAVE BOTH.

SURE YOU CAN.

LONG AS YOU REMEMBER WHICH IS MORE IMPORTANT.

THAT'S RIGHT.

AS LONG AS YOU NEVER LET YOUR MARRIAGE

INTERFERE WITH YOUR CAREER,

YOU'VE GOT IT MADE. I SAID IT WRONG.

BLESS YOUR HEART.

OKAY. I DON'T LIKE TO DO THIS, LIBB,

BUT I'M GOING TO HAVE TO GET TOUGH.

NOW, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO MAKE A DECISION

RIGHT HERE AND NOW.

ARE YOU GOING TO MAKE THE SCREEN TEST?

I TOLD YOU, I'D DO THAT WEDNESDAY.

SCREEN TEST FOR GEORGE HAMILTON, LIBBY CARUSO.

SPEED.

ALL RIGHT, ACTION.

COME IN.

DOCTOR PARKS?

COME IN, MS. FRANKLIN.

I'M LEAVING THE HOSPITAL TODAY.

YES, I... I KNOW.

I WISH I KNEW HOW TO THANK YOU,

BUT I SIMPLY DON'T KNOW HOW TO PUT MY GRATITUDE INTO WORDS.

WOULD YOU MIND?

WOULD IT BE ALL RIGHT IF I KISSED YOU GOODBYE?

OF COURSE.

ALL RIGHT, CUT.

THAT'S VERY GOOD.

THANK YOU.

THIS TIME, A LITTLE MORE HESITATION

ON "GRATITUDE," MS. CARUSO.

I SIMPLY DON'T KNOW HOW TO PUT MY GRATITUDE INTO WORDS.

THAT'S FINE. NOW THIS TIME, KISS HIM.

-KISS HIM? -YES.

-I DID. -YOU KISSED HIM ON THE CHEEK.

I MEAN REALLY KISS HIM.

YOU CAN MOVE IN A LITTLE, GEORGE.

-OKAY. -YOU MEAN KISS HIM FOR REAL?

-YES. -GEORGE HAMILTON, ON THE LIPS?

BUT YOU'RE SECRETLY IN LOVE WITH HIM, HONEY.

YOU MAY NEVER SEE HIM AGAIN.

BUT ACTUALLY, WE ONLY JUST MET.

-WHO? -MR. HAMILTON AND I.

WHAT'S THAT GOT TO DO WITH THIS?

WELL, YOU JUST DON'T GO AROUND KISSING

SOMEBODY YOU HARDLY KNOW,

ESPECIALLY IN FRONT OF A LOT OF STRANGERS.

I HOPE YOU UNDERSTAND. I MEAN, I'D LOVE TO KISS YOU,

ANY GIRL WOULD.

IF SHE COULD GET YOU ALONE. BUT EVEN THEN,

A KISS ON THE LIPS IS SOMETHING YOU HAVE TO WORK UP TO,

AT LEAST I DO.

SINCE MR. HAMILTON HAS BEEN SO KIND

AS TO TAKE TIME OFF FROM A VERY BUSY SCHEDULE,

TO HELP YOU WITH THIS TEST, DO YOU THINK YOU MIGHT TRY

TO WORK UP TO IT?

WELL, WHEN YOU PUT IT THAT WAY...

LOOK, I'LL DO WHAT I CAN TO HELP YOU.

THANK YOU.

ALL RIGHT, LET'S TRY IT AGAIN.

WHERE DO THEY GET THESE SCREWY DAMES?

WHAT'S SCREWY? TO HER, A KISS IS SOMETHING SPECIAL.

READY, GEORGE?

AS FAR AS I KNOW.

READY, MS. CARUSO?

READY.

23 ACT, TAKE TWO.

ROLL THEM. ACTION.

COME IN.

DOCTOR PARKS?

OH, COME IN, MS. FRANKLIN.

I'M LEAVING THE HOSPITAL TODAY.

YES, I... I KNOW.

I WISH I KNEW HOW TO THANK YOU,

BUT I SIMPLY DON'T KNOW HOW TO PUT MY...

GRATITUDE INTO WORDS. WOULD IT BE ALL RIGHT?

WOULD YOU MIND IF I, UM...

IF KISSED YOU GOODBYE?

OF COURSE.

♪

YOU KNOW, SHE'S NOT AS SHORT AS I THOUGHT SHE WAS.

CUT! CUT! CUT!

THANK YOU, MR. HAMILTON.

YOU CERTAINLY GOT OVER YOUR SHYNESS IN A HURRY.

WELL, THAT WAS BECAUSE OF HIM,

AND THE FACT THAT MY FIRST CHOICE, MY DREAM MAN,

HAS ALWAYS BEEN A DOCTOR.

HEY THERE, LIBB. HEY LIBB!

EXCUSE ME. I KNOW HER.

EXCUSE ME. LIBB!

SAY, LIBB. SAY, LIBBY!

I KNOW HER.

OH, PAUL. HOW NICE TO SEE YOU.

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN KEEPING YOURSELF?

ME? I'VE BEEN TRYING TO GET IN TOUCH WITH YOU.

I JUST SAW YOU DO YOUR SCREEN TEST.

OH, THAT? THAT WAS ONLY THE LONG SHOT.

THEY LIKE YOU TO HOLD BACK TILL YOU DO THE CLOSE-UPS.

HOLD BACK?

LIBB, CAN WE TOGETHER AND TALK OR SOMETHING?

WHAT DID YOU HAVE IN MIND?

WELL, A LOT OF THINGS.

LIKE ONE DAY YOU'RE MINDING YOUR OWN BUSINESS,

AND ALL OF A SUDDEN COMES ALONG THIS LITTLE HALF-PINT,

WHO LOOKS LIKE SHE SHOULD BE PLAYING IN A SANDBOX

OR SOMETHING, AND THEN...

-AND THEN... -AND THEN?

AND THEN YOU TAKE ANOTHER LOOK,

AND EVERYTHING'S CHANGED.

AND YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'VE GOT GOING ON IN YOUR MIND.

OH, THAT'S AWKWARD. DOES THAT MAKE ANY SENSE TO YOU?

FINALLY.

WELL THEN, WHEN CAN I SEE YOU? TONIGHT?

WELL, I LEAVE FOR LAS VEGAS DAY AFTER TOMORROW,

SO I GUESS IT'LL HAVE TO BE TONIGHT.

IS EIGHT O'CLOCK ALL RIGHT?

OH, DON'T FORGET, PICK ME UP AT THE NEW HOUSE.

YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE NEW HOUSE YET, HAVE YOU?

WHAT? LAS VEGAS? LEAVE? FOR HOW LONG?

OH, ONLY EIGHT WEEKS. CAN'T BE ANY LONGER,

BECAUSE THEN I HAVE TO LEAVE ON MY TOUR.

TOUR?

I'M GOING TO TIE IN PERSONAL APPEARANCES

WITH THE LADY VALET.

I DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS SET YET.

I SIGN THE CONTRACTS TOMORROW.

AND I DON'T HAVE TO DECIDE ABOUT EUROPE UNTIL LATER.

EUROPE?

IF THEY LIKE MY SCREEN TEST, I'M GOING TO BE MAKING

A MOVIE IN EUROPE, AND JAN SAYS WE'LL MEET ALL KINDS

OF INTERESTING PEOPLE.

YEAH. OH, JAN'S GOING TOO?

FOR HOW LONG?

AT LAST COUNT, NOT MORE THAN TWO YEARS.

EIGHT O'CLOCK THEN?

EIGHT. TWO YEARS?

ISN'T THAT A LONG TIME?

UH-HUH.

♪

YOU'RE GOING TOO?

♪

OH, JAN, WHICH ONE?

THE WRONG DRESS COULD RUIN EVERYTHING.

MIND IF I ASK A QUESTION?

HOW COME, IF YOU'RE MEANT FOR EACH OTHER,

IT TAKES MORE PLANNING, RESEARCH AND MANEUVERING

THAN IT DOES TO GET A MAN ON THE MOON?

LACK OF TIME.

TIGER HAS TO HAVE AN ANSWER FOR EVERYBODY TOMORROW,

SO I HAVE TO GET PAUL TO PROPOSE TONIGHT.

-TONIGHT? -RIGHT.

AND IT'LL BE A NEAT TRICK, ON ACCOUNT OF

HE HASN'T GOT THE FAINTEST IDEA

THAT HE WANTS TO GET MARRIED.

WELL, I'M SURE YOU'LL GET THE IDEA ACROSS.

YOU AND THE BELLS, ONLY...

ONLY WHAT?

WELL, I THINK SOMEBODY SHOULD BE KNOCKING HIS BRAINS OUT

TO WIN YOU.

WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE WHO WINS WHO?

CUZ IS THE ONLY MAN I'LL EVER LOVE.

CUZ? WHAT'D YOU JUST SAY?

I SAID 'CAUSE PAUL'S THE ONLY MAN I'LL EVER LOVE.

WHAT DID YOU THINK I SAID?

I THOUGHT YOU SAID CUZ.

'CAUSE.

BY THE WAY, HAS ANYBODY HEARD FROM HIM?

WHO?

CUZ?

I TALKED WITH HIM TODAY.

OH? WELL, GIVE HIM MY REGARDS,

NEXT TIME YOU TALK TO HIM.

OKAY.

WHEN DO YOU THINK THAT'LL BE?

ABOUT HALF AN HOUR.

YOU MEAN YOUR DATE'S WITH HIM?

MY DATE'S WITH HIM.

COME ON, THERE'S PAUL, AND HE'S TWO MINUTES EARLY.

THAT'S A GOOD SIGN, ISN'T IT?

YOU'RE NOT EVEN READY. WHAT KIND OF SIGN IS THAT?

PART OF MY PLAN. I'LL ONLY BE A MINUTE.

WILL YOU GO TO TALK TO HIM? GO AHEAD.

♪

HELLO?

HI.

-MY, DON'T YOU LOOK NICE. -THANK YOU.

STILL USING THAT GREASY KID STUFF?

I'M SUPPOSED TO ENTERTAIN YOU WHILE YOU WAIT.

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE? CARD TRICKS? FUNNY SAYINGS?

OR SHALL I RECITE A POEM?

NO, YOUR DOUBLE TALK IS ENTERTAINING ENOUGH.

WHAT DOUBLE TALK?

LIKE THE WAY YOU SAY HELLO.

NOW, THAT CAN MEAN ANYTHING FROM "HI, HOW ARE YOU,"

TO "PARDON ME, WHILE I STICK A SHIV IN YOUR BACK."

OH, I SEE, YOU'RE GOING TO DO THE FUNNY SAYINGS.

LET ME KNOW WHEN I'M SUPPOSED TO LAUGH.

SURE YOU KNOW HOW? ALL RIGHT, COME ON, JAN.

WHAT IS IT WITH YOU? WHAT'S YOUR BEEF WITH ME?

I BEG YOUR PARDON.

I BEG YOUR PARDON. I BEG YOUR PARDON.

GOT IT. THAT MEANS TOUCH MY BODY AND I'LL SCREAM, RIGHT?

WHY, NO SUCH THING.

MEANS YOUR TOUCH SENDS SHIVERS DOWN MY SPINE.

ONE LOOK AND I GROW FAINT. MY KNEES ARE WEAK.

I KNOW IT'S HOPELESS, BUT..

COME ON, CUT THAT OUT!

WHY PAUL, I'M SURPRISED.

AT WHAT?

YOU ARE STILL USING THAT GREASY KID STUFF.

GREETINGS.

♪

WOW.

LIBB, YOU LOOK LOVELY.

THANK YOU, JAN.

YEAH. WELL, SHALL WE GO?

YES.

♪

NIGHT, JAN.

GOOD NIGHT.

OH, HAVE A GOOD TIME WITH CUZ.

I WILL, THANKS.

JAN'S GOING OUT WITH CUZ. ISN'T IT NICE?

DANDY.

SO GLAD YOU APPROVE.

I NOT ONLY APPROVE, I GIVE YOU MY BLESSING.

CAN WE GO, JAN?

LIBB.

THAT'S WHAT I SAID, LIBB.

"I GIVE YOU MY BLESSING." OH, NO YOU DON'T.

YOU GIVE ME A BIG, FAT, PAIN IN THE...

♪

♪ LA DA DA DA, LA DA DA DA DA DA ♪

♪

♪ SOMEDAY ♪

♪ YOU WILL FIND ME ♪

♪ YOU'LL TAKE ME

AND MAKE ME A PART OF YOU ♪

♪ LOVE OF MY DREAMS,

WHEREVER YOU ARE ♪

♪ WHEREVER YOU ARE,

I LOVE YOU ♪

♪ WAITING ♪

♪ I'VE BEEN WAITING TO HOLD YOU ♪

♪ AND GIVE YOU

A LOVE THAT'S TRUE ♪

♪ OH, LOVE OF MY DREAMS,

WHEREVER YOU ARE ♪

♪ WHEREVER YOU ARE,

I LOVE YOU ♪

♪ WHEREVER YOU ARE,

COME FIND ME ♪

♪ AND TAKE ALL THE LOVE

I LONG TO GIVE ♪

♪ WHOEVER YOU ARE,

I LOVE YOU ♪

♪ AND I'LL LOVE YOU AS LONG AS I LIVE ♪

♪ ONE DAY, IF I'M LUCKY ♪

♪ YOU'LL SEE ME AND KNOW ME ♪

♪ AND WANT ME TOO ♪

♪ OH, LOVE OF MY DREAMS,

WHEREVER YOU ARE ♪

♪ WHOEVER YOU ARE ♪

♪ I LOVE YOU ♪♪

♪

NOT HERE.

OF COURSE NOT.

OF COURSE NOT HERE.

WHERE?

HE'S SHALLOW, VERY SHALLOW.

THAT'S PROBABLY WHY I DON'T LIKE HIM.

YOU STILL DON'T LIKE HIM?

MORE THAN EVER.

WELL, LIBBY HAS HER DRAWBACKS TOO.

AND I CERTAINLY DON'T INTEND TO WASTE

MY VALUABLE TIME HIDING AWAY IN BALTIMORE.

BALTIMORE. WHAT'S PLAYING IN BALTIMORE?

JOHN HOPKINS MEDICAL SCHOOL.

MEDICAL SCHOOL?

YOU? YOU'RE GOING TO BE A DOCTOR?

DID IT EVER OCCUR TO YOU THAT LIBB MIGHT HAVE BEEN

VERY INTERESTED IN A MAN WHO'S GOING TO BE A DOCTOR.

IT'S TOO LATE.

ANYHOW, YOU CAN'T FIGHT THE BELLS.

BELLS?

WHEN THEY KISS, BELLS ARE GOING TO RING.

THAT'S HOW THEY'LL KNOW IT'S FOR REAL.

THEY'RE GOING TO HEAR BELLS.

♪

OH, PAUL, IT'S BEEN SUCH A WONDERFUL EVENING.

I WISH IT WEREN'T OVER.

OVER? LISTEN, LIBB.

I HATE TO SAY GOOD NIGHT.

-GOOD NIGHT? LISTEN, LIBB-- -I MEAN, GOODBYE.

LISTEN, LIBB, ANGEL.

PAUL, DO YOU THINK WE SHOULD START

ANYTHING WE CAN'T FINISH?

I WANT TO FINISH!

BY ALL MEANS, LET'S FINISH.

YOU MEAN, YOU WANT TO GET MARRIED?

-YEAH, YEAH. -OH, PAUL.

-MARRIED, ANYTHING. -OH, WE'LL BE SO HAPPY.

YOU KNOW, THE FIRST THING I'LL DO, I'LL GIVE UP MY CAREER.

-GREAT, WONDERFUL. -OH, PAUL, PLEASE.

PLEASE, PAUL.

-PLEASE, PLEASE. -PLEASE WHAT?

PLEASE KISS ME.

YEAH!

♪

DO YOU HEAR ANYTHING?

NO, NO.

THAT'S STRANGE. NEITHER DO I.

DO YOU MIND IF WE TRY IT AGAIN?

MAYBE YOU'RE NOT HOLDING ME RIGHT. HERE.

A LITTLE CLOSER, PLEASE. NOW.

I WONDER IF I'M TRYING TOO HARD.

LOOK, DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.

I'M SURE THERE'S NOTHING AT ALL TO WORRY ABOUT.

ANYWAY, EVERYTHING ELSE IS SETTLED,

AND WE CAN WORK OUT THE DETAILS TOMORROW.

DETAILS?

ABOUT GETTING MARRIED?

YEAH. YEAH, YEAH, SURE, SURE.

JUST DON'T YOU WORRY.

GOOD NIGHT.

GOOD NIGHT.

♪

MARRIED?

♪

HI.

HI.

CONGRATULATIONS IN ORDER?

IT WORKED? HE BOUGHT THE WHOLE ROUTINE?

PERFECTLY.

WELL, THAT'S WONDERFUL, HUN. AS LONG AS THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT.

EXCEPT FOR ONE LITTLE, MINOR THING.

NO BELLS.

NO BELLS?

THERE'S PROBABLY A THOUSAND REASONS WHY I DIDN'T HEAR THEM.

I AM OVERTIRED. GOODNESS KNOWS THE PAST FEW WEEKS

HAVE BEEN MURDER.

NO BELLS?

I COULD HAVE BEEN CONCENTRATING TOO HARD.

OR MAYBE MY EARS ARE STUFFED. DO YOU THINK JAN--

LIBBY, YOU KNOW, PEOPLE DON'T REALLY HEAR BELLS.

SURE, I KNOW.

BUT AT LEAST I'D LIKE TO THINK I'LL HEAR THEM.

-OH, JAN, I'M IN BIG TROUBLE. -WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

WELL, I PROMISED TIGER I'D SET ALL THE DEALS TOMORROW.

BUT HOW I CAN I SET THEM IF I'M GOING TO GET MARRIED?

ON THE OTHER HAND, I DON'T WANT TO CANCEL THEM

IF I'M NOT GOING TO GET MARRIED.

AND I AM NOT GOING TO GET MARRIED

UNTIL I HEAR THOSE BELLS.

JAN, WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?

WELL, HONEY, WHO KNOWS? TOMORROW, YOU MAY NOT BE TIRED.

YOUR EARS MAY BE OKAY. YOU KISS PAUL,

AND BELLS WILL RING ALL OVER THE PLACE.

SOUNDS FINE, EXCEPT WHERE?

HOW? WHEN?

I CAN'T ASK HIM TO COME OVER HERE FOR A KISS TEST.

A KISS TEST?

WELL, THAT'S JUST WHAT IT AMOUNTS TO.

YEAH, IT DOES, DOESN'T IT?

WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?

I'M THINKING HOW YOU COULD... WAIT.

WHY NOT?

WHY NOT?

-I'M FOR IT! -YOU SURE?

IT'S A BRILLIANT IDEA. WHAT IS IT?

WHERE CAN YOU GO AND KISS TO YOUR HEART'S CONTENT,

WITH NOBODY PAYING ATTENTION?

I DON'T KNOW, BUT IT MUST BE HEAVEN.

A RAILROAD STATION OR AN AIRPORT.

SO, YOU HAVE TO LEAVE FOR SOMEWHERE UNEXPECTEDLY,

TOMORROW MORNING.

I'LL GET UP REAL EARLY, AND I'LL CALL PAUL AND CUZ,

AND TELL THEM TO MEET US AT THE AIRPORT, IN THE CLIPPER ROOM.

JAN, THAT'S NOT A BAD IDEA.

I HEARD YOU THE FIRST TIME. IT'S BRILLIANT.

PAN AMERICAN AIRWAYS JET CLIPPER.

FLIGHT 16 FOR GUATEMALA, PANAMA, AND RIO DE JANEIRO,

IS NOW PREPARING FOR DEPARTURE FROM GATE NUMBER 27.

WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FOR?

SOMETHING TO STAND ON.

I KNEW I SHOULD HAVE BROUGHT A SUITCASE

OR A LADDER OR SOMETHING.

-WHAT? -FOR PAUL!

WELL, STAND ON YOUR TOES AND LOOK UP.

I'VE TRIED THAT.

IT HURTS MY FEET, AND IT GIVES ME A STIFF NECK.

SOMETIMES I WISH HE WEREN'T SO GOSH DARN TALL.

WELL, I'LL GO SEE IF I CAN FIND SOMETHING.

ALL SET?

BEAUTIFUL. I THINK I OUTDID MYSELF.

WE GOT BELLS HERE YOU NEVER EVEN HEARD OF.

NOT NOW, FOR GOODNESS' SAKE.

YOU WANT TO BLOW THE WHOLE BIT?

MY ASSISTANTS, SUSIE BELL AND MARY BELL.

-I'M FLO. -AMY.

HI. NOW REMEMBER, NOT UNTIL I GIVE THE CUE,

BUT WHEN I GIVE THE CUE, LET'S HEAR IT.

RING THEM ALL, RING THEM LIKE CRAZY.

ALL RIGHT NOW, DRESS REHEARSAL.

POSITIONS, PLEASE.

COME ON, LIBB, WE'LL MISS THE PLANE.

PERFECT.

NOW, ARE YOU SURE YOU'LL BE ABLE TO HEAR ME ALL RIGHT?

SURE IS A SURPRISE ALL OF A SUDDEN YOU'RE GOING AWAY,

TODAY.

WELL, IT WAS A BIG SURPRISE TO ME TOO.

ANY QUESTIONS?

NOT A ONE. NOW, DON'T FORGET,

COME ON, LIBB, WE'LL MISS THE PLANE.

COME ON, LIBB, WE'LL MISS THE PLANE.

PAN AMERICAN AIRWAYS JET CLIPPER,

FLIGHT ONE, DEPARTING FROM GATE NUMBER 23.

HI, FELLAS, WELL THAT'S US.

WE BETTER GET STARTED. SAY GOODBYE, HONEY.

WELL, THIS IS IT.

-THIS IS WHAT? -GOOD BYE.

WOULD YOU PLEASE BEND YOUR KNEES A LITTLE?

BEND MY WHAT?

AND SAY GOODBYE.

OH, OH YEAH. GOODBYE ANGEL.

I'LL SEE YOU WHEN YOU GET BACK.

OH, THAT'S FINE. THAT'S A GREAT WAY TO SAY GOODBYE.

HEY, WOULD YOU BUTT OUT?

I TOLD YOU, I CAN'T STAND A SMART ALECK BROAD.

-GOODBYE! -NO, NO, NO, KISS HER.

WHAT? KISS HER?

I DON'T KISS PEOPLE IN PUBLIC PLACES.

SHE'S NOT PEOPLE AND THIS ISN'T THAT PUBLIC. KISS HER.

WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM?

SHE WANTS YOU TO KISS ME, PLEASE, PAUL!

IS EVERYBODY GOING A LITTLE FRUITCAKE?

YEAH, IT CERTAINLY LOOKS LIKE IT.

FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE, WILL YOU COOPERATE?

PAN AMERICAN AIRWAYS, FINAL CALL.

PAUL, PLEASE. MY NECK'S BEGINNING TO HURT.

-PLEASE. -OH, I HAVE SEEN

SOME DING-A-LINGS IN MY DAY, BUT YOU TWO,

COME ON LIBB, WE'LL MISS THE PLANE.

COME ON LIBB, WE'LL MISS THE PLANE.

WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?

♪

OH, CUZ. DID YOU HEAR THOSE BELLS?

LET'S NOT GET CARRIED AWAY, BUSTER.

AND HOW TALL ARE YOU? FIVE TEN AND A HALF.

PERFECT.

YOU DON'T KNOW HOW PERFECT.

I'D LIKE YOU TO MEET THE FUTURE DOCTOR CUZ RICKOVER.

A DOCTOR? JUST WHAT I'VE ALWAYS WANTED!

ISN'T EVERYBODY ALL MIXED UP?

THANKS TO ME, AND A FEW BELLS,

TRUE LOVE REIGNS SUPREME.

BELLS?

BELLS. WHEN THEY KISSED, SHE HEARD BELLS.

THAT'S HOW SHE KNEW CUZ WAS THE ONLY MAN SHE REALLY LOVED.

WHEN WE KISSED JUST NOW, I HEARD BELLS.

NATURALLY.

WHAT NATURALLY?

COME ON, JUNIOR. I'LL TEACH YOU THE FACTS OF LIFE.

WHENEVER YOU'RE READY, HONEY.

-SAY THE WORD. -WE'RE ALL SET.

YEAH, JUST GIVE US A CUE.

♪

♪ IF YOU DON'T WANT FORTUNE AND YOU DON'T WANT FAME ♪

♪ DON'T WANT EVERYBODY TO KNOW YOUR NAME ♪

♪ YEAH, YEAH, UH-HUH ♪

♪ JUST START LOOKING FOR LOVE ♪

♪ L-O-V-E, LOVE ♪

HEY, HOW COME I END UP WITH A SMART ALECK BROAD?

♪ YEAH, YEAH, UH-HUH ♪

♪ YEAH, YEAH, UH-HUH ♪

♪ YEAH, YEAH, UH-HUH ♪

♪ YEAH, YEAH, UH-HUH ♪

♪ JUST START LOOKING ♪

♪ JUST START LOOKING ♪

♪ JUST START LOOKING ♪

♪ FOR LOVE ♪♪