Original subtitles

FROZEN IN A TIME AND SPACE

DIVIDE

BUT HOW

WOULD THE UNIVERSE

SURVIVE?

DUCK DODGERS OF THE 24TH AND 1/2 CENTURY

PROTECTING THE POWERLESS

AND THE WEAK

DUCK DODGERS, HE'S FIGHTING

TYRANNY

IN THE 24TH

AND 1/2 CENTURY

- (STUTTERING) WHY ARE WE HERE AGAIN?

- I BET YOU'RE WONDERING WHY WE'RE HERE AGAIN,

AREN'T YOU?

TODAY WE'RE HERE TO ADDRESS SOME OF OUR NEEDS.

SPECIFICALLY, OUR NEED FOR SPEED.

THAT'S RIGHT.

WE'RE BUYING THE BADDEST ROCKET SCOOTER THEY MAKE.

- WE CAME HERE FOR THAT?

- HEY, HERE COMES RABID RON.

I'LL DO THE HAGGLING. YOU CATCH THE FOAM.

BOY, THAT RON SURE DRIVES A HARD BARGAIN.

FOR A GUY WITH RABIES.

- YOU KNOW, IT'S TOO BAD WE DIDN'T NEED A ROCKET SCOOTER

FOR A MISSION.

IF WE DID, THE PROTECTORATE MIGHT PAY FOR IT.

- CADET, HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU

TO FIX THAT HOLOGRAM PROJECTOR?

- SORRY, SIR, IT'S ON MY LIST.

- WAIT, I HAVE AN IDEA.

CADET.

- FIRST THING TOMORROW, SIR.

- AS I WAS SAYING,

ALL I NEED TO DO IS GET THE PROTECTORATE

TO BUY ME THE ROCKET SCOOTER

FOR A MISSION.

- DID YOU THINK OF THAT YOURSELF?

- YES...NOW ALL I HAVE TO DO IS THINK OF A PHONY MISSION.

(FLIES BUZZING)

HOLD ON, IT'S COMING TO ME NOW.

CADET!

- SORRY, SIR, I'M ON IT.

- SO, YOU'RE SAYING THESE ROCKET CYCLE RALLIES

ARE ACTUALLY MOBILE FESTIVALS OF CRIME AND DEBAUCHERY?

- DID I SAY THAT? THAT'S GOOD.

I MEAN...YES, THEY ARE.

- WELL, HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT?

- OH, I WASN'T ALWAYS THE HANDSOME, HEROIC CAPTAIN

YOU SEE TODAY.

IN MY TROUBLED YOUTH I FELL IN WITH A PRETTY TOUGH BIKER GANG.

(DING, DING)

HI.

CAN I BE IN YOUR BIKER GANG?

(POW)

AAHHH!

I'M IN! I'M IN THE GANG!

AND THAT'S ALL I HAVE TO SAY ABOUT THAT.

- YOU DIDN'T GROW UP IN FRANCE. - DETAILS.

THE POINT IS NO ONE UNDERSTANDS THE MIND OF THE ROCKET BIKER

BETTER THAN ME.

- WRONG ON MULTIPLE LEVELS.

BUT, OH, I SUPPOSE IT CAN'T HURT

TO HAVE YOU INVESTIGATE A RALLY OR TWO.

- NOW WE'RE TALKIN'!

NATURALLY, I'LL NEED SOME FUNDS FOR A DISGUISE.

OH, AND I'M GONNA NEED SOME WHEELS.

(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

- CAPTAIN, I'M NOT SURE ABOUT THESE DISGUISES.

- THIS IS HOW WE BIKERS DRESS, BROTHER.

WE'RE UNDERCOVER, REMEMBER?

THE NAME'S PATCH SCAR TISSUE.

- OK, BUT WHO AM I?

- YOU'RE THE ROUGHEST HOMBRE EVER TO SADDLE UP AN IRON HORSE.

BUT YOU'VE ALSO HAD A LOT OF HEAD INJURIES,

SO YOU MUMBLE AND DROOL A LOT.

YOUR HANDLE IS MAD BOAR.

THAT'S PLANET DAKOTA.

NOW, THESE BIKERS WILL BE THE MEANEST,

MOST DANGEROUS OUTLAWS WE'VE EVER FACED.

IF WE BLOW OUR COVER, WE'RE GONERS.

AND IT WON'T BE EASY,

BECAUSE THESE PEOPLE CAN SMELL A PIG A MILE AWAY.

- (GASP)

- LOOK, A BABY DEER.

- DON'T BE FOOLED BY THE PICTURESQUE SCENERY.

THIS PLANET IS A WRETCHED HIVE OF SCUM AND VILLAINY.

LOOK AT 'EM, MAD BOAR.

HAVE YOU EVER SEEN SUCH RAW GRIT?

- YEAH, AT THE PROTECTORATE'S LAST ICE CREAM SOCIAL.

- BOY, WE GOTTA DO SOMETHING REALLY OUTRAGEOUS

TO EARN STREET CRED WITH THESE THUGS.

WAIT HERE.

- OK, BUT I'M RUNNING LOW ON DROOL.

- OOOHH-WHEEE!

SORRY TO CUT OFF THE TUNES, FELLOW VAGRANTS,

BUT I'M PATCH SCAR TISSUE,

AND I WANT YOU TO SEE THAT I AIN'T AFRAID OF NOTHIN'.

NOT EVEN PAPER CUTS.

AAH!

(THUD)

- ARE YOU OK, CAPTAIN?

I MEAN, SCAR? UH, PATCHES, SIR?

YOU FAINTED. YOU KNOW YOU HATE BLOOD.

- HATE IT? I LOVE BLOOD.

AS LONG AS I DON'T HAVE TO SEE OR TOUCH IT.

I'M PRACTICALLY A VAMPIRE. AND WHO ARE THESE STIFFS?

SOME CIVILIANS WE'RE HOLDING FOR RANSOM?

- HI, THERE. I'M HARV WHEELY.

- AND I'M EDNA WHEELY.

- WE'RE CO-PRESIDENTS

OF THE WHEELY ROCKET CYCLE APPRECIATION CLUB.

- SO YOU'RE THE LEADERS OF THE PACK, EH?

WELL, WHAT'S OUR NEXT SCORE?

ROLLING AN ARMORED SPACE TRUCK?

- OH, HEAVEN'S NO. HA HA HA HA!

WE ARE GONNA HAVE A TREASURE HUNT, THOUGH.

- SO, WHAT?

WE'RE DIGGIN' UP THE LOOT FROM YOUR LAST BANK HEIST?

- AH HA! NO!

WE'RE GOING TO SPLIT INTO GROUPS

AND COLLECT UNUSUAL OBJECTS FROM NATURE LIKE 4-LEAF CLOVERS

AND EAGLE FEATHERS AND WHATNOT.

- WHAT? WHEN DOES THE CRIME START?

- CRIME? OH, HO HO HO HO HO HO!

NO, THERE'S NO CRIME HERE.

UNLESS HAVING FUN IS A CRIME.

- HA HA HA HA HA HA! - HA HA HA HA HA HA!

- IF IT WAS I'D BE PUBLIC ENEMY NUMBER ONE.

HA HA HA HA HA!

- PUT HIM IN FUN JAIL.

- THROW AWAY THE KEY! HA HA HA...FUN!

SEE YOU AT THE QUILT-OFF.

- CADET, I THINK THESE PEOPLE

MAY ACTUALLY BE LAW-ABIDING CITIZENS.

- YES, BUT THAT'S GOOD, ISN'T IT?

- NO!

IF WE DON'T BUST SOMEBODY,

THE PROTECTORATE WON'T PAY FOR MY HOG!

I GUESS IF THESE PEOPLE WON'T BREAK THE LAW ON THEIR OWN,

WE'LL JUST HAVE TO SHOW THEM HOW TO BREAK IT.

- OR YOU COULD FIND A WAY TO PAY FOR THE SCOOTER YOURSELF.

- NOW YOU'RE JUST BEING UNREASONABLE.

(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

(BOOM)

- WHEN I GOT HERE YOU WERE NOTHING

BUT A BUNCH OF DECENT, HARD-WORKING,

UPSTANDING, ROCKET CYCLE ENTHUSIASTS.

NOW YOU'RE THE DEMON DOGS,

A LAWLESS BAND OF HARD RIDIN' BARBARIANS

THAT RESPECT NOTHIN' BUT HAVOC AND DESTRUCTION.

I'VE NEVER BEEN MORE PROUD.

NOW, GET OUT THERE AND RAISE A LITTLE HECK.

- ONE, TWO, 3, 4!

(PLAYING HARD ROCK MUSIC)

(ENGINES REVVING)

- AAHHH!

- PROBABLY NOT MY BEST IDEA, HUH?

- CREATING AND UNLEASHING A GANG OF LAWLESS MARAUDERS

ON THE UNIVERSE?

NO, PROBABLY NOT.

- LOOKED GOOD ON PAPER, THOUGH, HUH?

- AHH, THESE WEEKEND DRIVES MAKE IT ALL WORTHWHILE.

TENSION JUST MELTS AWAY.

THE SOLAR WIND IN MY HAIR.

THE STARS TWINKLING IN THE SKY.

THE DEAFENING ROAR OF COUNTLESS RAMPAGING ROCKET CYCLES?

(SCREAMING)

- THAT'S I.Q.

THEY'RE DESTROYING HIS SPACE CADDIE.

- DEMON DOGS, HEAR ME.

I HAVE A CONFESSION TO...

- LOUDER! - YEAH, LOUDER!

- CAN'T HEAR YOU. - CAN'T HEAR YA!

- SORRY, IS THIS ANY BETTER?

- SPEAK UP!

- YEAH, WE STILL CAN'T HEAR YOU!

- IS THIS BETTER?

- OWW! - TURN IT DOWN!

- GOOD? GOOD...OK.

AS I WAS SAYING,

I HAVE A CONFESSION... A CONFESSION TO MAKE.

I'M NOT THE RUTHLESS, CUTTHROAT, SUAVE, HANDSOME,

BIKER REBEL YOU THINK I AM.

I'M NOT PATCH SCAR TISSUE.

I JUST PRETENDED TO BE

SO I COULD GET A FREE ROCKET SCOOTER.

I DON'T EVEN NEED AN EYE PATCH.

SEE? I'M A CAPTAIN IN THE GALACTIC PROTECTORATE.

SO, WHAT DO YOU SAY WE ALL GO HOME

AND FORGET ANY OF THIS EVER HAPPENED?

- OK? GREAT. - PIG.

(ALL CHANTING "PIG")

- STOP!

ANY OF YOU THINK YOU CAN KNOCK OLD MAD BOAR DOWN,

TAKE ONE STEP FORWARD.

THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT.

NOW, TURN THOSE HOGS AROUND AND HEAD BACK TO PLANET DAKOTA.

MAD BOAR'S BUYING ICE CREAM FOR EVERYBODY.

- ICE CREAM!

(ALL CHEERING)

- LET'S GO, DODGERS.

- YOU WANT ME TO RIDE WITH YOU IN THE SPACE CADDIE?

- NO, YOU'RE GOING TO PUSH MY BABY

ALL THE WAY BACK TO THE BODY SHOP.

- BUT, BUT, BUT, BUT, WHAT ABOUT MY HOG?

- OH, THAT'S NOT YOUR HOG ANYMORE.

IT BELONGS TO MAD BOAR NOW.

- (GRUNTING)

(PANTING)

AAHHH!