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1
00:00:03,879 --> 00:00:05,422
Jerry, this is disgusting.
2
00:00:05,464 --> 00:00:06,965
How did it get
so dirty already?
3
00:00:07,007 --> 00:00:09,301
Because your crappy pool bot
doesn't work.
4
00:00:09,343 --> 00:00:11,303
Pool not found.
Searching.
5
00:00:11,345 --> 00:00:12,846
But the guy that lives
behind the pool-store Dumpster
6
00:00:12,930 --> 00:00:14,556
gave me a sweet deal.
7
00:00:14,640 --> 00:00:16,558
Oh, my God, why didn't
you hire Keith the pool guy
8
00:00:16,642 --> 00:00:18,143
like I told you?
9
00:00:24,858 --> 00:00:26,902
[Sloop!]
10
00:00:26,985 --> 00:00:28,529
Keith's schedule
was full.
11
00:00:28,612 --> 00:00:30,155
What are you jackoffs
talking about?
12
00:00:30,197 --> 00:00:31,907
Ooh, Jerry's new pool sucks?
13
00:00:31,990 --> 00:00:33,325
Allow me.
14
00:00:33,367 --> 00:00:34,826
No, Rick,
this is my pool!
15
00:00:34,910 --> 00:00:37,663
I can handle this mess
without your sci-fi shenanigans.
16
00:00:37,746 --> 00:00:39,206
Copy that.
17
00:00:39,289 --> 00:00:40,582
Treat Jerry like a baby
so he can feel like a man.
18
00:00:40,624 --> 00:00:42,459
Come on, Rick, let's go.
19
00:00:40,624 --> 00:00:42,459
Gotta scoot.
20
00:00:42,501 --> 00:00:44,127
Finally taking Morty
to Boob World.
21
00:00:44,169 --> 00:00:45,546
And we need to stop by the store
for supplies.
22
00:00:45,629 --> 00:00:47,047
Good luck with your septic tank,
Jerry. [ Burps ]
23
00:00:47,130 --> 00:00:48,674
Ugh.
I gotta go to work.
24
00:00:48,757 --> 00:00:51,134
Someone's gotta win
the bread around here.
25
00:00:51,176 --> 00:00:53,178
Pool not found.
Searching.
26
00:00:53,220 --> 00:00:54,805
Trader Joe's
hashbrowns --
27
00:00:54,846 --> 00:00:58,809
the most efficient booze
absorber in the multiverse.
28
00:00:58,850 --> 00:01:00,769
Think you're supposed
to heat those up first, big guy.
29
00:01:00,811 --> 00:01:04,356
No, look, Morty, my mouth
is an air fryer now.
30
00:01:04,398 --> 00:01:06,358
It's really happening,
huh?
31
00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:08,277
I'm finally going
to Boob World.
32
00:01:08,318 --> 00:01:10,862
Oh, yeah!
Boob World, baby!
33
00:01:10,904 --> 00:01:15,075
Oh, damn it!
What the...
34
00:01:15,158 --> 00:01:16,868
It appears there has been
an accident.
35
00:01:16,952 --> 00:01:19,454
That happens. No harm, no foul.
Have a good one, buddy.
36
00:01:19,496 --> 00:01:21,832
We should exchange
information before going
37
00:01:21,873 --> 00:01:23,625
our separate ways.
38
00:01:23,667 --> 00:01:25,502
We could go even "separater"
ways by not exchanging anything.
39
00:01:25,544 --> 00:01:27,170
But our bumpers
collided.
40
00:01:27,212 --> 00:01:28,505
Oh, my God, is this
how you make friends?
41
00:01:28,547 --> 00:01:30,340
Is this how
you make enemies?
42
00:01:30,382 --> 00:01:31,675
What the hell
does that mean?
43
00:01:31,717 --> 00:01:32,926
Rick, stop!
44
00:01:33,010 --> 00:01:34,636
He started it.
45
00:01:33,010 --> 00:01:34,636
He did not start it.
46
00:01:34,678 --> 00:01:37,389
Be the bigger man so we can
go to Boob World already!
47
00:01:37,431 --> 00:01:39,057
Fuck that. We gotta set
this idiot straight.
48
00:01:39,141 --> 00:01:40,809
Look, buddy,
49
00:01:40,851 --> 00:01:43,061
it's obvious you're some kind of
heightened Kung Fu archetype.
50
00:01:43,145 --> 00:01:44,646
But I'm
a Doctor Who-Loki.
51
00:01:44,688 --> 00:01:46,523
And people like you
are like NPCs to me.
52
00:01:46,565 --> 00:01:48,525
So do yourself a favor
and --
53
00:01:48,567 --> 00:01:49,651
[ Grunting ]
54
00:01:49,735 --> 00:01:50,736
[ Crowd gasps ]
55
00:01:50,819 --> 00:01:52,195
I have struck you
56
00:01:52,237 --> 00:01:54,573
with the Five Point
Exploding Heart Technique --
57
00:01:54,615 --> 00:01:57,576
the most fatal punch in all
of martial arts.
58
00:01:57,618 --> 00:02:00,996
Victims are able to walk
only five steps forward
59
00:02:01,079 --> 00:02:03,248
before their heart explodes.
60
00:02:03,290 --> 00:02:05,208
Five steps forward?
61
00:02:05,250 --> 00:02:07,169
Try it and find out.
62
00:02:07,252 --> 00:02:08,253
Don't tell me what to do.
63
00:02:08,337 --> 00:02:10,255
I'll find out with science.
64
00:02:10,297 --> 00:02:12,341
Nice day for a backwards walk.
65
00:02:12,424 --> 00:02:13,675
Are you really gonna --
66
00:02:13,759 --> 00:02:15,135
No, stupid!
67
00:02:15,218 --> 00:02:16,678
Pull the car around
and pick me up!
68
00:02:16,762 --> 00:02:24,686
{\an8}♪♪
69
00:02:24,770 --> 00:02:32,736
{\an8}♪♪
70
00:02:32,778 --> 00:02:40,744
{\an8}♪♪
71
00:02:40,786 --> 00:02:48,585
{\an8}♪♪
72
00:02:48,627 --> 00:02:50,170
{\an8}What did that idiot
do to me?
73
00:02:50,253 --> 00:02:51,922
{\an8}This doesn't make
any damn sense.
74
00:02:51,963 --> 00:02:53,757
{\an8}Just apologize.
75
00:02:56,093 --> 00:02:57,302
{\an8}Haven't we done
clones enough?
76
00:02:57,344 --> 00:02:59,638
{\an8}Not a clone, Morty.
A Xerox of me
77
00:02:59,721 --> 00:03:01,306
{\an8}that I've lobotomized
to be a crash-test dummy.
78
00:03:01,390 --> 00:03:03,058
{\an8}Look at my balls!
79
00:03:01,390 --> 00:03:03,058
{\an8}Hey, do us a favor.
80
00:03:03,141 --> 00:03:04,810
{\an8}Walk forward
five to six steps.
81
00:03:04,851 --> 00:03:05,977
{\an8}Your choice.
82
00:03:06,061 --> 00:03:09,231
{\an8}One. Two.
Three. Four.
83
00:03:09,314 --> 00:03:11,316
{\an8}Huh?
So this is legit.
84
00:03:11,358 --> 00:03:13,652
{\an8}Better take
a closer look.
85
00:03:13,735 --> 00:03:15,320
{\an8}Look at my ball--
86
00:03:15,404 --> 00:03:17,489
{\an8}There are over 700 meridians
in the human body.
87
00:03:17,531 --> 00:03:20,242
{\an8}Mr. Kung Fu struck
specific pressure points in me
88
00:03:20,325 --> 00:03:22,119
{\an8}and induced commotio cordis.
89
00:03:22,160 --> 00:03:24,079
{\an8}Five steps forward will cause
massive compression build-up,
90
00:03:24,162 --> 00:03:26,498
{\an8}causing my heart to explode
under its own pressure.
91
00:03:26,540 --> 00:03:28,333
{\an8}Let's see what happens
when I attach a copy of my heart
92
00:03:28,417 --> 00:03:30,502
{\an8}to a copy of my legs.
93
00:03:35,006 --> 00:03:36,508
{\an8}Interesting, huh?
94
00:03:36,591 --> 00:03:38,927
{\an8}More gross than interesting.
So far, we're on brand.
95
00:03:39,010 --> 00:03:40,512
{\an8}Fuck you.
Watch this.
96
00:03:44,433 --> 00:03:45,767
{\an8}[ Heart beating ]
97
00:03:45,851 --> 00:03:47,561
{\an8}See that? Cardiac
detonation is triggered
98
00:03:47,644 --> 00:03:49,771
{\an8}only by forward
bipedal movement.
99
00:03:49,855 --> 00:03:51,273
{\an8}I can't believe I'm missing
Boob World for this!
100
00:03:51,356 --> 00:03:52,524
{\an8}Just apologize
to the guy.
101
00:03:52,566 --> 00:03:54,526
{\an8}Maybe he'll un-punch you.
102
00:03:54,568 --> 00:03:56,361
{\an8}The day I apologize will be
because I am truly sorry.
103
00:03:56,445 --> 00:03:58,697
{\an8}I don't sully apologies
by making it a ritual
104
00:03:58,780 --> 00:04:02,033
{\an8}of flagellation for someone who,
in this case, is a bully.
105
00:04:02,075 --> 00:04:03,910
{\an8}You called the man
an NPC.
106
00:04:03,994 --> 00:04:06,413
{\an8}Why do you always have
to take the side of the waiter?
107
00:04:06,496 --> 00:04:09,166
{\an8}Because your side
is insane!
108
00:04:09,207 --> 00:04:10,375
{\an8}Okay, then.
Fuck off.
109
00:04:10,417 --> 00:04:12,335
{\an8}Maybe I will!
110
00:04:10,417 --> 00:04:12,335
{\an8}Go ahead!
111
00:04:12,377 --> 00:04:14,671
{\an8}No one's stopping you!
112
00:04:12,377 --> 00:04:14,671
{\an8}Fine!
113
00:04:14,713 --> 00:04:16,173
{\an8}This is me fucking off
out of the fucking garage
114
00:04:16,214 --> 00:04:18,425
{\an8}because you...suck.
115
00:04:18,508 --> 00:04:20,886
{\an8}No, you...suck.
116
00:04:20,927 --> 00:04:23,513
{\an8}You...
117
00:04:20,927 --> 00:04:23,513
{\an8}You...
118
00:04:28,518 --> 00:04:32,731
{\an8}Pool not found.
Searching.
119
00:04:32,814 --> 00:04:33,732
{\an8}Pool not found.
120
00:04:33,815 --> 00:04:35,400
{\an8}The pool is right behind you.
121
00:04:35,442 --> 00:04:37,819
{\an8}Just turn around,
you stupid thing.
122
00:04:37,903 --> 00:04:39,571
{\an8}No! [ Sighs ]
123
00:04:39,613 --> 00:04:41,490
{\an8}Jerry, this is your moment.
124
00:04:41,573 --> 00:04:43,617
{\an8}Be a man and figure it out.
125
00:04:45,410 --> 00:04:48,163
Hi, there,
emasculated pool dads.
126
00:04:48,246 --> 00:04:50,040
Okay. Specific.
127
00:04:50,081 --> 00:04:51,333
Is your pool gross?
128
00:04:51,416 --> 00:04:52,918
Does your family
not respect you?
129
00:04:52,959 --> 00:04:54,544
Don't worry.
130
00:04:54,586 --> 00:04:56,254
I'll show you
how to upgrade your TR-X1
131
00:04:56,296 --> 00:04:59,090
and clean your pool
better than any human being.
132
00:04:59,132 --> 00:05:01,760
But first, let's discuss
the history of pool cleaning.
133
00:05:01,843 --> 00:05:04,179
Oh, boy.
This is three hours?
134
00:05:04,262 --> 00:05:07,140
...really important to never --
'Cause it's dangerous.
135
00:05:07,224 --> 00:05:08,850
Bloody stuff of nightmares!
136
00:05:08,892 --> 00:05:10,852
Now that we've gone over
the safety guidelines,
137
00:05:10,936 --> 00:05:14,022
click the link below for
a list of long language models.
138
00:05:14,064 --> 00:05:15,190
Be sure to upload them --
139
00:05:15,273 --> 00:05:16,900
I get it.
140
00:05:16,942 --> 00:05:18,443
[ Beeps ]
141
00:05:18,485 --> 00:05:20,737
[ Beeping ]
142
00:05:20,779 --> 00:05:23,281
Pool detected.
Clean, clean, clean...
143
00:05:23,365 --> 00:05:25,575
I did it!
I made something work!
144
00:05:25,617 --> 00:05:28,453
I am the greatest husband alive!
145
00:05:28,537 --> 00:05:30,330
Walk backwards the rest
of your life.
146
00:05:30,413 --> 00:05:34,084
God, see if I care.
147
00:05:34,125 --> 00:05:35,961
Uh...hi.
148
00:05:36,044 --> 00:05:37,462
You, uh...
149
00:05:37,546 --> 00:05:39,631
You death punched
my grandpa this morning?
150
00:05:39,673 --> 00:05:41,633
That was unfortunate.
151
00:05:41,675 --> 00:05:44,636
I did not study under See-Foo
Gerd Jergins at Tiger's Nest
152
00:05:44,719 --> 00:05:46,555
to beat up old people.
153
00:05:46,596 --> 00:05:49,516
The point of martial arts
is to avoid violence.
154
00:05:49,599 --> 00:05:51,142
I am Liu Sin.
155
00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:53,645
Oh, um, I'm Morty Smith.
156
00:05:53,687 --> 00:05:56,731
Is it racist to say I adore
your Kung Fu patience?
157
00:05:56,815 --> 00:05:58,817
I can teach you.
158
00:05:56,815 --> 00:05:58,817
Racism?
159
00:05:58,900 --> 00:06:00,986
No. Kung Fu.
160
00:06:01,027 --> 00:06:02,946
[ Bird squawks ]
161
00:06:02,988 --> 00:06:04,698
Breathe.
162
00:06:04,781 --> 00:06:07,325
Feel your Chi
circulate within.
163
00:06:07,409 --> 00:06:09,035
[ Exhales ]
164
00:06:07,409 --> 00:06:09,035
Very good, Morty.
165
00:06:09,119 --> 00:06:10,495
This is great.
166
00:06:10,579 --> 00:06:13,123
Life with Rick is filled
with so much anxiety.
167
00:06:13,164 --> 00:06:14,958
Alrighty, Mr. Sin,
168
00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:17,711
I didn't have the right cables
to hook up the flat screen.
169
00:06:17,794 --> 00:06:20,171
It's gonna cost a bit extra
to get those.
170
00:06:20,213 --> 00:06:22,132
Hmm. Pity.
171
00:06:24,384 --> 00:06:25,844
Jesus!
Don't step forward.
172
00:06:25,886 --> 00:06:27,679
You only get five steps
before you die!
173
00:06:27,762 --> 00:06:30,849
But I have so much
to do today.
174
00:06:30,932 --> 00:06:32,183
Uhh.
175
00:06:32,267 --> 00:06:33,768
What was up with that guy?
176
00:06:33,852 --> 00:06:37,022
Dude! He was just doing
his job, and you killed him.
177
00:06:37,063 --> 00:06:39,608
Is that a criticism?
178
00:06:43,653 --> 00:06:46,489
Activate
Advance-Limitation Suit.
179
00:06:48,158 --> 00:06:51,703
Ha ha! Look who ain't stepping
forward now, baby!
180
00:06:51,745 --> 00:06:53,705
Morty:
[ Crying ] Rick!
181
00:06:53,788 --> 00:06:55,332
Rick!
182
00:06:55,373 --> 00:06:56,958
Morty, what happened?
183
00:06:57,042 --> 00:06:58,418
I got death punched.
184
00:06:58,501 --> 00:07:01,087
Oh, no, no, no, no,
my little pooh-bah!
185
00:07:01,171 --> 00:07:04,132
I went back to Trader Joe's
to eat my feelings
186
00:07:04,215 --> 00:07:05,759
because I was mad at you.
187
00:07:05,842 --> 00:07:08,762
But then I ran into Liu Sin,
and he punched me.
188
00:07:08,845 --> 00:07:11,222
Nobody fucks with my
sweet little grandson.
189
00:07:11,306 --> 00:07:13,642
First, I'm gonna cure the dick
off this death punch, Morty.
190
00:07:13,725 --> 00:07:15,018
And then I'm gonna destroy
191
00:07:15,060 --> 00:07:17,520
Mr. Liu Sin's
entire belief system!
192
00:07:17,562 --> 00:07:21,024
Clean, clean, clean.
Task complete.
193
00:07:21,066 --> 00:07:22,525
Awaiting command.
194
00:07:22,567 --> 00:07:24,235
Amazing!
Oh, I gotta tell Beth.
195
00:07:24,319 --> 00:07:27,280
[ Cellphone rings ]
196
00:07:24,319 --> 00:07:27,280
Uh, hello?
Beth, I fixed the pool.
197
00:07:27,364 --> 00:07:29,240
Uh, great.
Did you hire Keith?
198
00:07:29,324 --> 00:07:31,660
No. The pool is clean
because of me.
199
00:07:31,743 --> 00:07:32,786
Come home and look.
200
00:07:32,869 --> 00:07:34,746
Jerry, please.
I am literally
201
00:07:34,788 --> 00:07:36,456
in the middle
of something.
202
00:07:36,539 --> 00:07:37,916
[ Call ends ]
203
00:07:36,539 --> 00:07:37,916
Oh.
204
00:07:37,999 --> 00:07:40,335
Fuckin' phone.
Where'd you go?
205
00:07:40,418 --> 00:07:42,045
Awaiting command.
206
00:07:42,087 --> 00:07:43,254
[ Sighs ]
207
00:07:46,341 --> 00:07:49,052
[ Laughing ]
Whatcha doing?
208
00:07:49,094 --> 00:07:52,055
Clean?
209
00:07:52,097 --> 00:07:53,556
Alright.
210
00:07:53,598 --> 00:07:55,976
This pool isn't gonna
swim itself.
211
00:07:56,059 --> 00:08:00,563
How are you gonna clean --
Oh. That's nice.
212
00:08:00,605 --> 00:08:04,359
Wow. You...
You're really being thorough.
213
00:08:04,442 --> 00:08:08,196
Maybe we...we should stop.
214
00:08:08,279 --> 00:08:09,572
[ Romantic music playing ]
215
00:08:09,614 --> 00:08:13,451
♪ Oh, baby, now I'm lost ♪
216
00:08:13,535 --> 00:08:16,788
♪ In your secret love ♪
217
00:08:16,830 --> 00:08:19,708
♪ You pulled me down ♪
218
00:08:19,791 --> 00:08:22,794
♪ Where no one can find us ♪
219
00:08:22,836 --> 00:08:26,965
♪ My lover
in the darkest part of night ♪
220
00:08:27,048 --> 00:08:30,635
♪ They'll never pull me
from your arms ♪
221
00:08:30,719 --> 00:08:36,433
♪ And into the light ♪
222
00:08:36,474 --> 00:08:40,478
♪ Ohhhh ♪
223
00:08:40,562 --> 00:08:42,564
♪ Ohhh ♪
224
00:08:42,647 --> 00:08:46,651
{\an8}[ Dramatic Asian music plays ]
225
00:08:46,693 --> 00:08:47,986
{\an8}I'd be pissed
if I had to climb
226
00:08:48,069 --> 00:08:49,654
all these stupid steps
with my legs.
227
00:08:49,738 --> 00:08:52,949
[ Gong sounds ]
228
00:08:52,991 --> 00:08:55,368
What is it?
I'm watching TV.
229
00:08:55,452 --> 00:08:57,078
Are you Gerd Jergins?
230
00:08:57,120 --> 00:09:00,290
Did you train a guy
named Liu Sin?
231
00:09:00,331 --> 00:09:01,833
Ugh, that guy sucks.
232
00:09:01,875 --> 00:09:03,209
We're in these antigrav suits
233
00:09:03,293 --> 00:09:04,669
'cause your student
death punched us.
234
00:09:04,711 --> 00:09:06,504
You are not alone.
235
00:09:06,546 --> 00:09:08,590
Liu Sin death punched
my cat.
236
00:09:08,673 --> 00:09:10,008
Ouch!
237
00:09:10,091 --> 00:09:11,509
I want to do a bunch
of science on your punch
238
00:09:11,593 --> 00:09:13,219
to cure ourselves.
239
00:09:13,303 --> 00:09:14,512
Just need to collect a little
more Kung Fu data from you
240
00:09:14,596 --> 00:09:15,597
so I can hack it.
241
00:09:15,680 --> 00:09:17,307
You think me dumb?
242
00:09:17,348 --> 00:09:20,226
If I help you unlock the secrets
of pressure-point fighting,
243
00:09:20,310 --> 00:09:22,687
you are going to revenge
all over Liu Sin.
244
00:09:22,771 --> 00:09:26,775
The solution to violence
is not more violence.
245
00:09:26,858 --> 00:09:28,485
[ Cellphone rings ]
246
00:09:28,526 --> 00:09:32,030
Hello? Are you coming over
for mother's birthday or not?
247
00:09:32,113 --> 00:09:35,033
What? No, no, no, no,
you cannot bring all of them.
248
00:09:35,075 --> 00:09:37,952
I'm not the one being difficult.
You may bring one partner.
249
00:09:37,994 --> 00:09:40,538
One. Not seven,
for crying out loud.
250
00:09:40,580 --> 00:09:41,790
It's weird!
251
00:09:40,580 --> 00:09:41,790
[ Call ends ]
252
00:09:41,873 --> 00:09:44,375
Oh, shit.
253
00:09:41,873 --> 00:09:44,375
Trouble in paradise?
254
00:09:44,459 --> 00:09:47,629
Oh, my daughter and I
have a tricky relationship.
255
00:09:47,712 --> 00:09:51,508
She is what the kids
call today a "polycule."
256
00:09:51,549 --> 00:09:53,718
In my day,
we called them sluts.
257
00:09:53,802 --> 00:09:56,221
If we helped you fix
things with your daughter,
258
00:09:56,262 --> 00:09:57,722
would you help us?
259
00:09:57,764 --> 00:10:05,396
Hmmmmmmmmmm-
mmmmmmmmmmm.
260
00:10:05,480 --> 00:10:06,898
Oh, my God, what have I done?
261
00:10:06,940 --> 00:10:08,900
To confirm setting
a daily reminder
262
00:10:08,942 --> 00:10:10,568
for pool bot sexy time,
say yes.
263
00:10:10,652 --> 00:10:12,987
What?
264
00:10:10,652 --> 00:10:12,987
I have compiled a list
265
00:10:13,029 --> 00:10:14,531
of divorce attorneys
in your area.
266
00:10:14,572 --> 00:10:16,241
Would you like me
to send?
267
00:10:16,324 --> 00:10:18,243
No!
Cancel, cancel!
268
00:10:18,284 --> 00:10:20,620
Uh, hey, Beth.
269
00:10:20,703 --> 00:10:21,788
You're right.
270
00:10:21,871 --> 00:10:23,456
This pool bot is
not working out.
271
00:10:23,540 --> 00:10:25,834
We should hire Keith,
the pool cleaner, like, today.
272
00:10:25,917 --> 00:10:27,085
Can I have his number?
273
00:10:27,127 --> 00:10:29,254
He's right next door?
Great!
274
00:10:29,295 --> 00:10:30,880
[ Beeps ]
275
00:10:30,922 --> 00:10:32,757
[ Mimics explosion ]
276
00:10:32,799 --> 00:10:36,261
{\an8}So great that you were
in the area, Keith.
277
00:10:36,302 --> 00:10:38,763
{\an8}When can you start?
Like now? Now is good for us.
278
00:10:38,847 --> 00:10:40,765
{\an8}I appreciate your
enthusiasm, Mr. Smith,
279
00:10:40,849 --> 00:10:42,267
{\an8}but I just packed up
for the day.
280
00:10:42,350 --> 00:10:44,769
{\an8}I'll pay you double if you --
if you start now.
281
00:10:44,853 --> 00:10:46,604
{\an8}What's the hurry?
282
00:10:46,688 --> 00:10:48,314
It looks like
your pool's clean.
283
00:10:48,398 --> 00:10:49,732
Whore! Whore!
284
00:10:49,774 --> 00:10:51,359
What are you doing?!
285
00:10:51,442 --> 00:10:52,735
Kill! Kill!
286
00:10:52,777 --> 00:10:54,821
No, no!
Let him go!
287
00:10:57,115 --> 00:10:58,449
Task incomplete.
288
00:10:58,533 --> 00:11:00,118
Kill, kill, kill!
289
00:11:00,201 --> 00:11:01,619
Good Lord,
she's gone rogue.
290
00:11:01,703 --> 00:11:02,871
Oh!
291
00:11:02,912 --> 00:11:05,373
Task incomplete.
Kill. Kill.
292
00:11:05,456 --> 00:11:07,584
And lastly, but not leastly,
293
00:11:07,625 --> 00:11:09,586
this is Rizz,
Milo and Kathleen.
294
00:11:09,627 --> 00:11:11,087
It's too many people.
295
00:11:11,129 --> 00:11:12,839
How will I remember
all these names?!
296
00:11:12,922 --> 00:11:14,632
Ugh, why do I even try?
297
00:11:14,716 --> 00:11:16,843
I was intrigued by the floating
pod man and his little helper.
298
00:11:16,926 --> 00:11:18,178
But you'll never change.
299
00:11:18,261 --> 00:11:20,013
You're still an old farty
fart face.
300
00:11:20,096 --> 00:11:21,806
My face does not fart!
301
00:11:21,890 --> 00:11:23,850
You are disrespectful daughter!
302
00:11:23,933 --> 00:11:26,394
Hey, respect
cuts both ways.
303
00:11:26,477 --> 00:11:28,021
Trust me.
304
00:11:28,104 --> 00:11:30,982
You won't explode if you meet
your daughter halfway.
305
00:11:31,065 --> 00:11:32,817
Uh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
306
00:11:32,859 --> 00:11:35,612
It's not the seven partners
that bother me.
307
00:11:35,653 --> 00:11:38,698
It's that now
there are seven ways
308
00:11:38,781 --> 00:11:39,908
to get your heart broken.
309
00:11:39,991 --> 00:11:41,784
Dad, this is the life
I've chosen.
310
00:11:41,826 --> 00:11:44,621
Please respect that.
311
00:11:44,662 --> 00:11:49,292
Stephanie, you may bring
everyone to Mom's birthday.
312
00:11:49,334 --> 00:11:50,418
Everyone?
313
00:11:50,460 --> 00:11:52,587
Yes. Milo,
Kathleen, Rizz.
314
00:11:52,670 --> 00:11:55,757
Oboe, Turmeric,
Almond Butter and Bartholomew.
315
00:11:55,840 --> 00:11:57,383
You're all welcome.
316
00:11:57,467 --> 00:11:59,052
Thanks, Dad.
317
00:11:59,135 --> 00:12:01,638
Looks like we lived up
to our end of the bargain.
318
00:12:01,679 --> 00:12:03,765
Well, I suppose
I'd be a total dick
319
00:12:03,806 --> 00:12:05,642
if I didn't give you
what you want.
320
00:12:05,683 --> 00:12:08,436
Your words.
But, yeah.
321
00:12:08,519 --> 00:12:09,896
Just hit the Punchamalizer.
322
00:12:09,979 --> 00:12:11,648
Its AI will whip me up
a death-punch cure.
323
00:12:11,689 --> 00:12:14,067
I warn thee,
Rick Sanchez.
324
00:12:14,150 --> 00:12:16,527
Abusing the punch
will bring down
325
00:12:16,569 --> 00:12:18,738
tremendous
fury upon you!
326
00:12:18,821 --> 00:12:20,031
Punch up or shut up.
327
00:12:20,114 --> 00:12:22,075
[ Sighs ]
328
00:12:22,158 --> 00:12:24,661
[ Yelling ]
329
00:12:24,702 --> 00:12:32,710
{\an8}♪♪
330
00:12:32,794 --> 00:12:34,587
[ Popping ]
331
00:12:34,671 --> 00:12:36,381
[ Beeps ]
332
00:12:36,464 --> 00:12:38,549
Did it work?
I don't feel anything.
333
00:12:38,591 --> 00:12:40,301
Only five ways to find out.
334
00:12:40,385 --> 00:12:43,263
One...two...
335
00:12:43,346 --> 00:12:44,597
three...
336
00:12:44,681 --> 00:12:46,224
four...
337
00:12:46,307 --> 00:12:48,226
five...six...
338
00:12:48,309 --> 00:12:49,394
fucking seven!
339
00:12:49,477 --> 00:12:50,728
Morty, we're cured!
340
00:12:50,770 --> 00:12:52,647
You did it!
We can walk forward!
341
00:12:52,730 --> 00:12:55,024
[ Both laughing ]
342
00:12:56,901 --> 00:12:58,361
Oh, running around.
343
00:12:58,403 --> 00:12:59,654
[ Laughing continues ]
344
00:12:59,737 --> 00:13:01,572
[ Door opens ]
345
00:12:59,737 --> 00:13:01,572
Wubbalubbadubdub!
346
00:13:01,614 --> 00:13:03,283
[ Door closes ]
347
00:13:03,366 --> 00:13:07,412
[ Door opens,
laughing continues ]
348
00:13:08,079 --> 00:13:09,455
[ Handheld vacuum whirring ]
349
00:13:09,539 --> 00:13:12,333
Rick: Hey, Liu!
350
00:13:12,375 --> 00:13:14,711
Morty: Liu Sin!
351
00:13:15,920 --> 00:13:17,880
Look who's walking
forward now.
352
00:13:17,964 --> 00:13:19,549
How is it that you live?
353
00:13:19,590 --> 00:13:21,009
Science!
354
00:13:19,590 --> 00:13:21,009
Science!
355
00:13:21,050 --> 00:13:22,719
I have dissected
the Exploding Heart Technique
356
00:13:22,760 --> 00:13:24,971
and reverse-engineered all
of martial arts.
357
00:13:25,054 --> 00:13:27,390
The pre-programmed nanobots
coursing through our veins
358
00:13:27,432 --> 00:13:28,516
have given Morty and I...
359
00:13:28,558 --> 00:13:30,101
Both: Kung Fu power.
360
00:13:30,184 --> 00:13:31,811
Hmm! My martial-art skills
are unmatched.
361
00:13:31,894 --> 00:13:33,438
Prepare to die.
[ Yells ]
362
00:13:33,521 --> 00:13:35,648
Morty, you saw it!
He came for me.
363
00:13:35,732 --> 00:13:37,567
Let the ass-whoopin'
begin.
364
00:13:37,650 --> 00:13:45,074
{\an8}♪♪
365
00:13:45,158 --> 00:13:49,245
[ Yells ]
366
00:13:49,287 --> 00:13:56,127
{\an8}♪♪
367
00:13:56,210 --> 00:13:58,880
First, I will give you
whites a taste of hell,
368
00:13:58,921 --> 00:14:02,800
and then you will
apologize for bending my fender.
369
00:14:02,884 --> 00:14:04,719
You want an apology?
Come get it.
370
00:14:04,761 --> 00:14:06,262
All: Yaaahhh!
371
00:14:06,304 --> 00:14:10,808
{\an8}♪♪
372
00:14:13,978 --> 00:14:16,397
Ah! Ah!
Gross! Birds!
373
00:14:16,439 --> 00:14:18,066
Birds pecking
gross worms.
374
00:14:19,942 --> 00:14:20,777
Ow!
375
00:14:20,818 --> 00:14:22,153
[ Car alarm blaring ]
376
00:14:25,907 --> 00:14:27,158
Hot. Too hot.
377
00:14:27,241 --> 00:14:28,368
I need milk.
378
00:14:28,451 --> 00:14:30,370
Aah!
379
00:14:32,955 --> 00:14:34,415
[ Engine starts ]
380
00:14:34,457 --> 00:14:35,708
[ Tires screech ]
381
00:14:35,792 --> 00:14:38,211
Yaaaahh!
382
00:14:44,384 --> 00:14:46,052
[ Moans ]
383
00:14:46,135 --> 00:14:47,345
My thoughts are
so big now.
384
00:14:47,428 --> 00:14:52,183
{\an8}♪♪
385
00:14:53,559 --> 00:14:56,854
Ohh. That's better.
386
00:15:01,734 --> 00:15:03,319
Aaaahhh!
387
00:15:03,361 --> 00:15:05,405
[ Coughing ]
388
00:15:05,488 --> 00:15:06,739
What am I doing here?
389
00:15:06,823 --> 00:15:08,866
{\an8}And which Beth is the clone?
390
00:15:09,951 --> 00:15:12,286
Now I remember.
This guy sucks.
391
00:15:18,292 --> 00:15:20,169
[ Yells ]
392
00:15:20,211 --> 00:15:21,838
Rick: Reverse reverse punch!
393
00:15:21,879 --> 00:15:23,548
Morty: I know you are,
but what am I punch!
394
00:15:23,631 --> 00:15:25,341
I'm rubber, you're glue punch!
395
00:15:30,012 --> 00:15:32,056
[ People screaming ]
396
00:15:35,643 --> 00:15:37,812
Unrepentant dogs!
397
00:15:37,854 --> 00:15:41,524
You have disrespected
the power of the punch.
398
00:15:41,607 --> 00:15:44,193
Who the fuck
is this guy?
399
00:15:44,235 --> 00:15:45,903
It is Punchy, the ancient
Demon-God of hitting things
400
00:15:45,987 --> 00:15:47,530
and sweet drinks.
401
00:15:47,613 --> 00:15:49,323
We be doomed.
402
00:15:49,365 --> 00:15:51,868
Okay. We should
be safe in here.
403
00:15:51,909 --> 00:15:53,536
She can't move
out of the pool.
404
00:15:53,578 --> 00:15:54,704
"She"?
405
00:15:54,745 --> 00:15:55,955
My robotic
pool cleaner.
406
00:15:56,038 --> 00:15:57,707
I upgraded her
with shady software.
407
00:15:57,790 --> 00:15:59,375
Then we had sex.
408
00:15:59,417 --> 00:16:00,793
I think she's jealous
and wants to kill you
409
00:16:00,877 --> 00:16:02,378
because she loves me.
410
00:16:02,462 --> 00:16:03,838
Ha. Mondays, right?
411
00:16:03,880 --> 00:16:09,260
Hmmmmmmmmmmmm.
412
00:16:09,343 --> 00:16:13,473
{\an8}♪♪
413
00:16:13,556 --> 00:16:15,349
Task incomplete.
414
00:16:15,391 --> 00:16:18,227
Task incomplete.
415
00:16:18,311 --> 00:16:21,355
{\an8}♪♪
416
00:16:21,397 --> 00:16:25,401
Task incomplete.
Task incomplete.
417
00:16:25,443 --> 00:16:26,819
[ Beeping ]
418
00:16:26,903 --> 00:16:32,783
{\an8}♪♪
419
00:16:32,867 --> 00:16:38,581
{\an8}♪♪
420
00:16:38,623 --> 00:16:41,167
Huh? The house went into
lockdown for no reason.
421
00:16:41,250 --> 00:16:42,335
Is that bad?
422
00:16:42,376 --> 00:16:45,838
You hear that?
Sounds like water running.
423
00:16:48,132 --> 00:16:49,717
Gerd did say
abusing the punch
424
00:16:49,759 --> 00:16:51,177
would bring great fury
down on us.
425
00:16:51,260 --> 00:16:54,013
Kung Fu is not
about violence.
426
00:16:54,055 --> 00:16:59,936
Now you will be punished
by my champion kicking your ass.
427
00:17:00,019 --> 00:17:01,395
[ Thunder crashes ]
428
00:17:01,437 --> 00:17:04,815
{\an8}♪♪
429
00:17:04,899 --> 00:17:07,443
[ Laughs evilly ]
430
00:17:07,485 --> 00:17:08,819
It is Punchenhimer,
431
00:17:08,903 --> 00:17:11,447
the beast
with a million pressure points.
432
00:17:11,489 --> 00:17:14,116
It is impossible
to strike all of them.
433
00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:15,785
How are we supposed
to hit them all?
434
00:17:15,868 --> 00:17:17,995
[ Roars ]
435
00:17:18,079 --> 00:17:19,622
Rick, this is my fault.
436
00:17:19,664 --> 00:17:21,958
Earlier today, in the
Trader Joe's parking lot,
437
00:17:22,041 --> 00:17:25,169
I backed into your spaceship
on purpose.
438
00:17:25,253 --> 00:17:26,045
What?
439
00:17:26,128 --> 00:17:27,964
I am a lonely old man.
440
00:17:28,005 --> 00:17:30,049
The only way I know
how to connect with people
441
00:17:30,132 --> 00:17:31,801
is through conflict.
442
00:17:31,884 --> 00:17:34,303
Can you relate to that?
443
00:17:34,387 --> 00:17:35,763
No.
444
00:17:35,805 --> 00:17:39,308
Punchenhimer is on top of us.
What are we gonna do?
445
00:17:39,392 --> 00:17:42,186
I wish I had finished
my training at Tiger's Nest.
446
00:17:42,270 --> 00:17:45,147
Gerd Jergins was teaching me
the ultimate move --
447
00:17:45,231 --> 00:17:46,983
the splatter bolt kick,
448
00:17:47,024 --> 00:17:49,151
a rapid-fire attack
stronger than any punch.
449
00:17:49,193 --> 00:17:52,530
Alas, I do not have
the knowledge to complete it.
450
00:17:52,613 --> 00:17:55,032
Rick does.
He gathered all Kung Fu data
451
00:17:55,116 --> 00:17:56,784
when he dissected the
Exploding Heart Technique.
452
00:17:56,826 --> 00:17:58,411
It'll take a bit
of field surgery.
453
00:17:58,452 --> 00:18:00,830
I am willing
to endure whatever it takes
454
00:18:00,913 --> 00:18:02,373
to reset the balance.
455
00:18:02,456 --> 00:18:04,041
Lie down.
456
00:18:04,125 --> 00:18:06,752
I'll try to keep the rubble
out of your chest.
457
00:18:06,836 --> 00:18:09,297
Kill, kill, kill!
458
00:18:09,338 --> 00:18:11,173
Oh, no.
She's found her way in.
459
00:18:11,215 --> 00:18:13,426
The pool bot is flooding
the house to kill you, Keith.
460
00:18:13,467 --> 00:18:15,636
We gotta swim upstairs
before it's too late.
461
00:18:15,678 --> 00:18:17,388
But I can't swim.
462
00:18:17,471 --> 00:18:19,807
What? You clean pools!
463
00:18:17,471 --> 00:18:19,807
That's my deepest shame.
464
00:18:19,849 --> 00:18:22,184
This is a total
nightmare for me.
465
00:18:22,268 --> 00:18:23,811
Kill, kill, kill, kill.
466
00:18:23,853 --> 00:18:24,895
Kill, kill --
467
00:18:24,979 --> 00:18:26,230
[ Grunts ]
468
00:18:29,025 --> 00:18:30,151
Stay here.
469
00:18:30,192 --> 00:18:32,028
It's my pool
and my problem.
470
00:18:32,111 --> 00:18:34,447
I'm the man
of the house.
471
00:18:35,906 --> 00:18:37,575
Kill, kill, kill.
472
00:18:37,658 --> 00:18:39,702
Oh, no. Wait.
473
00:18:39,785 --> 00:18:41,245
I'm sorry.
474
00:18:41,329 --> 00:18:42,955
That other pool cleaner
means nothing to me, baby.
475
00:18:43,039 --> 00:18:44,665
Nothing.
476
00:18:44,707 --> 00:18:46,959
You gots to believe
you're my one and only.
477
00:18:47,043 --> 00:18:48,336
Task incomplete.
478
00:18:48,377 --> 00:18:50,212
Shh. Our task
is incomplete,
479
00:18:50,254 --> 00:18:52,006
and I'm gonna fix that.
480
00:18:52,048 --> 00:18:55,843
Set an appointment
for pool bot sexy time
481
00:18:55,885 --> 00:18:58,554
starting now.
482
00:18:58,596 --> 00:18:59,722
Clean?
483
00:18:59,764 --> 00:19:02,933
♪ Oh, baby, now I'm lost ♪
484
00:19:03,017 --> 00:19:05,895
♪ In your secret love ♪
485
00:19:05,978 --> 00:19:08,939
[ Music continues ]
486
00:19:09,023 --> 00:19:10,566
[ Music slows down ]
487
00:19:10,608 --> 00:19:12,735
[ Grunting ]
488
00:19:12,818 --> 00:19:21,077
{\an8}♪♪
489
00:19:28,876 --> 00:19:30,252
[ Both coughing ]
490
00:19:30,294 --> 00:19:32,046
Alright, Jerry,
we need to talk about this pool.
491
00:19:32,088 --> 00:19:34,090
[ Gasps ] Wow!
492
00:19:34,131 --> 00:19:36,050
The pool looks
great, Keith.
493
00:19:36,092 --> 00:19:38,594
Uh, yeah.
Nice job, buddy.
494
00:19:38,678 --> 00:19:40,054
Sure. Yeah.
495
00:19:40,096 --> 00:19:41,430
All it needed was
a little elbow grease.
496
00:19:41,472 --> 00:19:43,432
And Mr. Smith said
he'll pay me
497
00:19:43,516 --> 00:19:46,143
three times
my usual rate.
498
00:19:46,227 --> 00:19:48,020
[ Laughing ]
Well, I never said...
499
00:19:48,104 --> 00:19:50,189
Oh, you better pay up
or I'll tell her
500
00:19:50,272 --> 00:19:52,358
you fucked
the pool bot.
501
00:19:52,441 --> 00:19:53,693
Guys, I'm only
3 feet away.
502
00:19:53,776 --> 00:19:54,944
I can hear everything.
503
00:19:54,985 --> 00:19:56,028
Jerry, you fucked
the what now?
504
00:19:56,112 --> 00:19:58,656
Um, the pool bot.
505
00:19:58,739 --> 00:20:00,241
It started cleaning my nipples.
506
00:20:00,282 --> 00:20:02,451
And, you know, that's --
that's one of my go-tos.
507
00:20:02,535 --> 00:20:04,912
So I started eating out her --
508
00:20:02,535 --> 00:20:04,912
Dah-dah-da.
509
00:20:04,954 --> 00:20:07,039
I don't care what you do
with the appliances, Jerry.
510
00:20:07,123 --> 00:20:09,041
My hair dryer makes me cum
like a wild cat.
511
00:20:09,125 --> 00:20:11,669
[ Roars, laughs evilly ]
512
00:20:11,752 --> 00:20:13,129
Hold it, Punchenhimer!
513
00:20:13,170 --> 00:20:14,463
Pack your bags, asshole!
514
00:20:14,505 --> 00:20:16,298
We're here to send you back
to Hell.
515
00:20:16,382 --> 00:20:18,467
Get ready to feel Kung Fu.
516
00:20:18,509 --> 00:20:22,638
Combined with fire.
Yeah!
517
00:20:22,722 --> 00:20:25,307
[ Lightning crashes ]
518
00:20:25,391 --> 00:20:28,185
Let's fight one
last time together.
519
00:20:28,269 --> 00:20:30,563
Oh, yeah, baby!
520
00:20:32,732 --> 00:20:36,152
[ All yelling ]
521
00:20:47,872 --> 00:20:49,290
[ Punchenhimer farts ]
522
00:20:49,331 --> 00:20:51,459
Wasn't that refreshing?
523
00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:55,671
You three have learned
the value of nonviolence.
524
00:20:55,755 --> 00:20:58,048
All is forgiven.
525
00:20:58,132 --> 00:21:01,177
[ Gong sounds ]
526
00:20:58,132 --> 00:21:01,177
Bye-e-e-e!
527
00:21:02,303 --> 00:21:03,512
Well, I'm bushed.
528
00:21:03,596 --> 00:21:05,389
[ Car alarm blaring,
woman screams ]
529
00:21:05,473 --> 00:21:07,266
Almost done?
530
00:21:07,308 --> 00:21:09,143
All finished.
What do you think, sir?
531
00:21:09,185 --> 00:21:11,187
It's ready!
Come and get it!
532
00:21:11,228 --> 00:21:13,147
[ Upbeat music playing ]
533
00:21:13,189 --> 00:21:15,566
-Wow!
-Damn, son.
534
00:21:15,649 --> 00:21:17,276
That's clean.
535
00:21:17,318 --> 00:21:18,819
Our pool is amazing.
You're the best dad ever.
536
00:21:18,861 --> 00:21:22,156
Yeah. Who needs Boob World
when we got Dad's pool?
537
00:21:22,198 --> 00:21:24,033
I just want to make you all
happy.
538
00:21:24,116 --> 00:21:26,535
You did, Jerry.
You really did.
539
00:21:26,577 --> 00:21:28,120
Ah, yes!
540
00:21:28,204 --> 00:21:30,790
[ Laughter ]
541
00:21:30,873 --> 00:21:33,834
Oh, my God, I'm at a party.
542
00:21:36,295 --> 00:21:38,255
Pool season, baby!
Yeah!
543
00:21:38,339 --> 00:21:40,090
The Smith family has a pool!
544
00:21:40,174 --> 00:21:41,592
{\an8}Man: ♪ One taste of you ♪
545
00:21:41,675 --> 00:21:46,472
{\an8}♪ I knew I had
to have more ♪
546
00:21:46,555 --> 00:21:52,186
{\an8}Woman: ♪ Your sweet taboo,
it brought me to my knees ♪
547
00:21:52,228 --> 00:21:59,151
{\an8}Both: ♪ Oh, baby, now I'm lost
in your secret love ♪
548
00:21:59,235 --> 00:22:02,404
{\an8}♪ You pulled me down ♪
549
00:22:02,446 --> 00:22:05,658
{\an8}♪ Where no one can find us ♪
550
00:22:05,699 --> 00:22:09,703
{\an8}♪ My lover in the darkest part
of night ♪
551
00:22:09,745 --> 00:22:13,916
{\an8}♪ They'll never pull me
from your arms ♪
552
00:22:13,958 --> 00:22:17,002
Beth, we talked about this.
553
00:22:17,086 --> 00:22:19,255
Okay, I-I forgot.
554
00:22:21,257 --> 00:22:22,758
Thank you.
555
00:22:25,177 --> 00:22:26,303
It's not the same.
556
00:22:26,387 --> 00:22:28,264
Yeah, I know.
557
00:22:30,349 --> 00:22:31,767
{\an8}Did you get any of that?
38444
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