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1
00:00:02,040 --> 00:00:03,069
(Drew)
'Good evening and welcome'
2
00:00:03,089 --> 00:00:05,049
'to "Whose Line Is It Anyway?"'
3
00:00:05,070 --> 00:00:06,099
'Tonight's performers.'
4
00:00:06,120 --> 00:00:07,240
'Whatever you do,
don't step in him'
5
00:00:07,259 --> 00:00:09,019
'Greg Proops.'
6
00:00:09,039 --> 00:00:12,130
'If you're a lady,
you gotta love Wayne Brady.'
7
00:00:12,150 --> 00:00:15,050
'Science experiment gone wrong,
Colin Mochrie'
8
00:00:15,070 --> 00:00:18,089
'and his fiendish creator,
Ryan Stiles!'
9
00:00:18,109 --> 00:00:19,160
And I'm your host, Drew Carey.
10
00:00:19,179 --> 00:00:21,140
Come on down.
Let's have some fun.
11
00:00:28,019 --> 00:00:29,179
Hey, welcome
to "Whose Line Is It Anyway?"
12
00:00:29,199 --> 00:00:30,179
the show where
everything's made up
13
00:00:30,199 --> 00:00:32,009
and the points don't matter.
14
00:00:32,030 --> 00:00:34,219
Hope you enjoyed watching
"The Drew Carey Show" just now.
15
00:00:34,240 --> 00:00:35,250
Uh..
16
00:00:37,210 --> 00:00:39,219
If you've never seen this show
before, what happens is
17
00:00:39,240 --> 00:00:42,070
these guys are gonna come down,
they're gonna come down on stage
18
00:00:42,090 --> 00:00:43,219
and they're gonna
totally improvise
19
00:00:43,240 --> 00:00:44,229
everything you're gonna
see tonight.
20
00:00:44,250 --> 00:00:46,109
It's all made up
right on the spot
21
00:00:46,130 --> 00:00:48,009
and they go by suggestions
that we have
22
00:00:48,030 --> 00:00:50,170
that they've never seen
before,
and also audience suggestions
23
00:00:50,189 --> 00:00:52,200
and then I give them points,
uh, for no reason
24
00:00:52,219 --> 00:00:55,020
because at the end of the show
I just pick the guy I like
best.
25
00:00:55,039 --> 00:00:58,090
And, uh...they get to do
something with me.
26
00:01:01,100 --> 00:01:02,079
So maybe the points
are more important
27
00:01:02,100 --> 00:01:03,140
than I thought they were.
28
00:01:03,159 --> 00:01:06,099
Uh, you ready to do
the first game, see how it
goes?
29
00:01:06,120 --> 00:01:07,120
'Okay.'
30
00:01:11,049 --> 00:01:13,079
The first game is called
Let's Make A Date.
31
00:01:13,099 --> 00:01:14,159
It's a game
for all four of you.
32
00:01:14,180 --> 00:01:15,289
'Uh, Ryan, Colin and Wayne'
33
00:01:16,010 --> 00:01:18,030
'you're gonna be contestants
on a dating-type show'
34
00:01:18,049 --> 00:01:19,090
hoping to be picked
by the handsome
35
00:01:19,109 --> 00:01:21,109
and nattily dressed Greg.
36
00:01:21,129 --> 00:01:23,019
[crowd cheering]
37
00:01:23,039 --> 00:01:24,180
- Okay.
- 'Oh, yeah.'
38
00:01:24,200 --> 00:01:26,289
(Drew)
'Each of you, uh, is gonna be
given a strange
characteristic'
39
00:01:27,010 --> 00:01:29,019
'or, uh, identity.
It's on the cards there.'
40
00:01:29,039 --> 00:01:31,230
They haven't seen these cards
before, uh, just now
41
00:01:31,250 --> 00:01:33,170
and Greg's gonna question them
like they do on a dating show
42
00:01:33,189 --> 00:01:35,069
and try to figure out
who he wants to go out with.
43
00:01:35,090 --> 00:01:38,150
So, uh, Greg,
when you're ready, go to it.
44
00:01:38,170 --> 00:01:41,129
Contestant number one, hi.
45
00:01:43,090 --> 00:01:45,270
[in French accent]
Bonjour.
46
00:01:45,289 --> 00:01:47,120
Yeah, how are you?
47
00:01:47,140 --> 00:01:50,219
I am fine,
but not as fine as you.
48
00:01:53,060 --> 00:01:54,090
[imitating Maurice Chevalier]
Oh, ho-ho.
49
00:01:54,109 --> 00:01:57,270
Oh-oh-oh, uh-huh, huh.
50
00:01:57,289 --> 00:01:59,060
(Greg)
'Uh, wow.'
51
00:01:59,079 --> 00:02:01,170
- Contestant number two.
- 'Yes.'
52
00:02:01,189 --> 00:02:02,280
- Hello!
- Hello.
53
00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:04,010
- 'Hi.'
- Hi.
54
00:02:04,030 --> 00:02:06,060
- 'Hi.'
- Hi.
55
00:02:06,079 --> 00:02:07,250
(Greg)
'I heart eating.'
56
00:02:07,269 --> 00:02:09,120
'Uh, if we are gonna
go out on a date'
57
00:02:09,139 --> 00:02:10,210
'where might you take me
to eat?'
58
00:02:10,229 --> 00:02:12,009
Well..
59
00:02:12,030 --> 00:02:14,020
Excuse me, I..
60
00:02:14,039 --> 00:02:15,250
Take you to eat..
61
00:02:17,240 --> 00:02:20,229
[slurring]
Well, I'd probably
take you to a restaurant
62
00:02:20,250 --> 00:02:22,210
'cause that's where the food is!
63
00:02:26,180 --> 00:02:29,069
♪ Going to the restaurant ♪
64
00:02:29,090 --> 00:02:31,139
♪ Going to the restaurant ♪
65
00:02:31,159 --> 00:02:34,079
♪ We're gonna go to the rest ♪♪
66
00:02:37,280 --> 00:02:39,090
You sound hecka fun.
67
00:02:39,110 --> 00:02:41,110
Uh, contestant number three.
68
00:02:41,129 --> 00:02:43,050
- 'How are ya?'
- 'Good. How are you?'
69
00:02:43,069 --> 00:02:45,030
[in Southern accent]
I'm very good, thank you.
70
00:02:46,150 --> 00:02:48,090
I love the out of doors.
71
00:02:48,110 --> 00:02:49,259
If we were gonna..
Yeah.
72
00:02:49,280 --> 00:02:52,050
If we were gonna go somewhere,
uh, you know, outside
73
00:02:52,069 --> 00:02:53,060
'where-where would you go?'
74
00:02:53,079 --> 00:02:55,120
Well, I've never been inside
75
00:02:55,139 --> 00:02:57,129
so, uh..
76
00:02:57,150 --> 00:02:59,110
[Drew laughs]
77
00:03:00,289 --> 00:03:03,159
I don't know, we might roll
around in the mud for a
while.
78
00:03:03,180 --> 00:03:05,139
I'll take good care of you,
you wouldn't get hurt
79
00:03:05,159 --> 00:03:07,120
you have to take me
to the court and sue.
80
00:03:07,139 --> 00:03:09,229
Sue, sue!
81
00:03:09,250 --> 00:03:12,000
- Sue!
- Sue!
82
00:03:14,159 --> 00:03:16,270
[laughs]
83
00:03:16,289 --> 00:03:19,180
Ah, contestant number un.
84
00:03:19,199 --> 00:03:20,180
- 'Oh.'
- Uh..
85
00:03:20,199 --> 00:03:22,259
[Drew laughs]
86
00:03:22,280 --> 00:03:24,090
I love the night life.
87
00:03:24,110 --> 00:03:25,139
I like to boogie.
88
00:03:25,159 --> 00:03:27,139
Um, where would you take me
89
00:03:27,159 --> 00:03:29,180
if we were gonna go out dancing?
90
00:03:29,199 --> 00:03:31,250
[in French accent]
I would take you
to the top of the moon
91
00:03:31,270 --> 00:03:33,259
and then I would spin you
around a crater
92
00:03:33,280 --> 00:03:35,229
and slap your lunar surface.
93
00:03:35,250 --> 00:03:38,210
[crowd cheering]
94
00:03:50,060 --> 00:03:52,120
Number two.
95
00:03:52,139 --> 00:03:55,129
Uh, if you were a carpenter..
96
00:03:55,150 --> 00:03:58,259
'...would you rather use
a drill or a hammer?'
97
00:03:58,280 --> 00:04:00,280
I love you.
98
00:04:02,039 --> 00:04:04,189
You're great! You're just..
99
00:04:04,210 --> 00:04:06,169
[retching]
100
00:04:08,020 --> 00:04:10,280
[crowd cheering]
101
00:04:25,180 --> 00:04:27,029
I didn't hear the last part.
102
00:04:27,050 --> 00:04:30,199
Um...number three
103
00:04:30,220 --> 00:04:32,000
if I were mashed potatoes
104
00:04:32,019 --> 00:04:33,279
'what would you spoon over me?'
105
00:04:37,259 --> 00:04:39,279
Oh, I'm sorry, I was..
106
00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:41,259
...thinkin' about
something else.
107
00:04:49,040 --> 00:04:50,139
[buzzer buzzes]
108
00:04:50,159 --> 00:04:52,220
Okay, uh, Greg, you wanna
guess who they are?
109
00:04:52,240 --> 00:04:55,120
Is it hot in here, Drew,
or is it just me?
110
00:04:55,139 --> 00:04:57,129
'Uh, number one is a French guy'
111
00:04:57,149 --> 00:04:58,290
'but he's, there's something
about the moon.'
112
00:04:59,009 --> 00:05:01,050
'He's a French astronaut
of some kind?'
113
00:05:01,069 --> 00:05:04,160
He's a, he's a romantic
French guy with..
114
00:05:04,180 --> 00:05:06,079
(Drew)
'Greatest lover in France.'
115
00:05:06,100 --> 00:05:08,290
He's the greatest lover
in France.
116
00:05:09,009 --> 00:05:11,139
And Colin is my Uncle Ted.
117
00:05:11,160 --> 00:05:14,079
Yes, it's your Uncle Ted!
How'd you guess?
118
00:05:14,100 --> 00:05:16,079
Well, how'd you guess that..
119
00:05:16,100 --> 00:05:19,160
And number three
is someone who was in the..
120
00:05:19,180 --> 00:05:21,240
'He's a country guy
from the cast of
"Deliverance."'
121
00:05:21,259 --> 00:05:23,160
Hog caller, he's a hog caller
122
00:05:23,180 --> 00:05:25,120
uh, who loves other things.
123
00:05:25,139 --> 00:05:28,060
He's a pig, he's a pig farmer
from Arkansas.
124
00:05:28,079 --> 00:05:30,040
- 'Of course he is.'
- 'Okay.'
125
00:05:30,269 --> 00:05:31,279
Thank you.
126
00:05:37,110 --> 00:05:39,079
And I gotta give
a 1000 points to Ryan
127
00:05:39,100 --> 00:05:41,000
for reading my mind.
128
00:05:41,019 --> 00:05:43,279
[laughing]
129
00:05:46,060 --> 00:05:49,149
Alright. Now we come to a game
called Scene To Rap.
130
00:05:49,170 --> 00:05:52,009
In this game, Greg and Wayne,
you're gonna make up a scene
131
00:05:52,029 --> 00:05:54,040
'and you'll be joined later
by Ryan and Colin'
132
00:05:54,060 --> 00:05:55,209
'and, uh,
you're all gonna be rapping'
133
00:05:55,230 --> 00:05:57,230
accompanied by mix master,
Laura Hall.
134
00:06:00,250 --> 00:06:02,050
Uh, we need a suggestion
from the audience
135
00:06:02,069 --> 00:06:03,110
a place where people work.
136
00:06:03,129 --> 00:06:05,230
- A hospital.
- Hospital. Okay, good one.
137
00:06:05,250 --> 00:06:07,089
Uh, rapping about the hospital
138
00:06:07,110 --> 00:06:09,050
and, uh,
whenever you're ready, go.
139
00:06:09,069 --> 00:06:11,069
[instrumental music]
140
00:06:11,089 --> 00:06:14,250
♪ Beep beep beep beep ♪
141
00:06:14,269 --> 00:06:16,050
♪ Boop boop boop ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
142
00:06:16,069 --> 00:06:20,069
♪ Uh-oh ooh uh-oh ooh ♪
143
00:06:20,089 --> 00:06:21,269
♪ Well there we go
that's that ♪
144
00:06:21,290 --> 00:06:24,029
♪ We better call the nurse
right up here stat ♪
145
00:06:24,050 --> 00:06:26,089
♪ Because this guy
he might lose his life race
♪
146
00:06:26,110 --> 00:06:28,149
♪ Because you see
he is a terminal case ♪
147
00:06:28,170 --> 00:06:30,199
♪ We need the doc
and we need a nurse ♪
148
00:06:30,220 --> 00:06:32,170
♪ Hurry to it stat man
I can't rehearse ♪
149
00:06:32,189 --> 00:06:34,279
♪ We gotta save his life
he has kids and wife ♪
150
00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:37,100
♪ And if we're not careful
he'll go under the knife ♪
151
00:06:37,120 --> 00:06:39,110
♪ Oh okay so he's gonna die ♪
152
00:06:39,129 --> 00:06:41,199
♪ But I gotta ask myself why ♪
153
00:06:41,220 --> 00:06:43,240
♪ I don't know why I'm here
I'm a neurologist ♪
154
00:06:43,259 --> 00:06:45,269
♪ I'm with you
and you're a proctologist ♪
155
00:06:45,290 --> 00:06:48,000
♪ I'll get the nurse
but it's okay ♪
156
00:06:48,019 --> 00:06:50,019
♪ I'm gonna get the nurse
hey hey hey hey ♪
157
00:06:50,040 --> 00:06:52,029
♪ Hey hey hey ♪
♪ Well I'm a doctor on the go ♪
158
00:06:52,050 --> 00:06:54,199
♪ And oddly enough
my name is Dr. No ♪
159
00:06:54,220 --> 00:06:56,129
♪ If I could rap
that would be a sensation ♪
160
00:06:56,149 --> 00:06:57,159
♪ But I can't
you see ♪
161
00:06:57,180 --> 00:06:59,149
♪ I'm just a Caucasian
say huh ♪
162
00:06:59,170 --> 00:07:02,009
♪ Say huh say huh ♪
163
00:07:02,029 --> 00:07:04,009
♪ Say huh ♪
♪ That's all I can do say huh ♪
164
00:07:04,029 --> 00:07:06,259
♪ Say huh say huh ♪
♪ Can't rap ♪
165
00:07:06,279 --> 00:07:09,220
♪ Now we need some help pronto ♪
166
00:07:09,240 --> 00:07:12,000
♪ Or else this man's life
will soon go ♪
167
00:07:12,019 --> 00:07:14,040
♪ Can't you do anything
Won't you please ♪
168
00:07:14,060 --> 00:07:16,060
♪ Because I'm beggin' you
please please please ♪
169
00:07:16,079 --> 00:07:18,079
♪ Well I know he's a man
so he don't need a pap ♪
170
00:07:18,100 --> 00:07:20,189
♪ But I'll take these two
things
and zap zap zap ♪
171
00:07:20,209 --> 00:07:22,170
[imitating voltage
through CPR paddles]
172
00:07:25,060 --> 00:07:27,029
♪ Hey there buddies
look at him ♪
173
00:07:27,050 --> 00:07:29,120
♪ He's dead he's dead
and his name is Jim ♪
174
00:07:29,139 --> 00:07:31,149
♪ What once was
is no longer were ♪
175
00:07:31,170 --> 00:07:33,129
♪ He's comin' with me
I'm the Grim Reaper ♪♪
176
00:07:40,269 --> 00:07:42,149
[buzzer buzzes]
177
00:07:44,250 --> 00:07:45,240
Yeah!
178
00:07:53,050 --> 00:07:55,279
Uh-oh, 1000 points for Wayne
179
00:07:56,000 --> 00:07:57,259
'cause the ladies
love the way he walks.
180
00:07:57,279 --> 00:08:00,120
[women hooting]
181
00:08:00,139 --> 00:08:02,000
Now let's play a game
called Hats.
182
00:08:02,019 --> 00:08:03,079
This is for all four of you.
183
00:08:03,100 --> 00:08:05,019
'Uh, Ryan and Colin,
come get your box of hats.'
184
00:08:05,040 --> 00:08:07,069
Greg and Wayne,
come get your box of hats.
185
00:08:07,089 --> 00:08:09,069
Get your boxes, take them
to your little corners.
186
00:08:09,089 --> 00:08:10,199
- Can you get that, Colin?
- Yeah.
187
00:08:10,220 --> 00:08:13,139
[Drew laughs]
188
00:08:13,160 --> 00:08:15,129
'Okay, this game goes
back and forth really quick'
189
00:08:15,149 --> 00:08:16,180
'and, uh, they have to use'
190
00:08:16,199 --> 00:08:18,120
as many hats as they can
in the box
191
00:08:18,139 --> 00:08:20,029
to come up with
as many examples as possible
192
00:08:20,050 --> 00:08:22,279
of the world's worst
dating service video.
193
00:08:25,019 --> 00:08:27,069
Start with Colin and Ryan,
anytime you're ready.
194
00:08:33,250 --> 00:08:36,059
Care to be a Knight Rider?
195
00:08:36,080 --> 00:08:37,070
[buzzer buzzes]
196
00:08:39,179 --> 00:08:42,159
I haven't had it
in four score and seven years.
197
00:08:42,179 --> 00:08:43,250
[buzzer buzzes]
198
00:08:47,049 --> 00:08:50,029
All I want is a few merry men.
199
00:08:50,049 --> 00:08:51,009
[buzzer buzzes]
200
00:08:53,259 --> 00:08:55,289
I'm into safe sex.
201
00:08:56,009 --> 00:08:57,009
[buzzer buzzes]
202
00:09:03,009 --> 00:09:04,269
And that's just my hat.
203
00:09:07,009 --> 00:09:08,129
[buzzer buzzes]
204
00:09:12,049 --> 00:09:14,279
My last boyfriend
gave me Hermes.
205
00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:16,100
[buzzer buzzes]
206
00:09:21,080 --> 00:09:23,000
You got me, babe.
207
00:09:24,240 --> 00:09:25,220
[buzzer buzzes]
208
00:09:28,269 --> 00:09:31,029
Um, hi, I'm the star
of my own ABC sitcom--
209
00:09:31,049 --> 00:09:34,009
[buzzer buzzes]
210
00:09:35,179 --> 00:09:38,080
[buzzer buzzes]
211
00:09:38,100 --> 00:09:40,100
Lewis! Lewis!
212
00:09:43,179 --> 00:09:46,049
And you don't need to worry,
I'm a Trojan!
213
00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:48,139
[buzzer buzzes]
214
00:09:54,000 --> 00:09:55,259
I'm looking for a girl
215
00:09:55,279 --> 00:09:57,240
who can keep her mouth shut.
216
00:09:59,259 --> 00:10:00,230
[buzzer buzzes]
217
00:10:03,120 --> 00:10:05,080
Care to be touched by an angel?
218
00:10:06,200 --> 00:10:07,169
[buzzer buzzes]
219
00:10:09,049 --> 00:10:11,139
I'm looking for one good woman
who's willing to fight.
220
00:10:11,159 --> 00:10:13,190
Are you willing to fight?
I'll represent you!
221
00:10:13,210 --> 00:10:14,190
[buzzer buzzes]
222
00:10:15,279 --> 00:10:17,240
Thank you very much!
223
00:10:20,259 --> 00:10:22,070
Hey, don't go away
224
00:10:22,090 --> 00:10:23,279
we'll be right back
right after these messages
225
00:10:24,000 --> 00:10:26,100
for more
"Whose Line Is It Anyway?"
226
00:10:32,070 --> 00:10:35,059
Hey, welcome back
to "Whose Line Is It Anyway?"
227
00:10:35,080 --> 00:10:38,000
the show where everything's made
up and the points don't matter.
228
00:10:38,019 --> 00:10:39,080
Nice to have you back, and, hey
229
00:10:39,100 --> 00:10:40,279
if you're watching on a TV
that's made in America
230
00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:43,200
we're all naked right now.
231
00:10:43,220 --> 00:10:46,059
Uh, now we come to a game
that's called Weird
Newscasters.
232
00:10:46,080 --> 00:10:47,159
This is for all four of you.
233
00:10:47,179 --> 00:10:49,220
'Uh, Greg, you're gonna be
anchor of a news program'
234
00:10:49,240 --> 00:10:50,259
'and Colin, Wayne and Ryan'
235
00:10:50,279 --> 00:10:52,070
'are gonna help him out
on the show.'
236
00:10:52,090 --> 00:10:54,250
'Uh, Greg,
your co-anchor is Colin'
237
00:10:54,269 --> 00:10:57,289
and Colin, you can no longer
hide his love for Greg.
238
00:11:01,210 --> 00:11:03,070
'And the sportscaster is Wayne.'
239
00:11:03,090 --> 00:11:05,139
Wayne, you're gonna be doing
James Brown.
240
00:11:06,269 --> 00:11:09,159
'Oh...and the weatherman
is Ryan.'
241
00:11:09,179 --> 00:11:12,200
'Ryan, you're the anchor's
angry neighbor.'
242
00:11:12,220 --> 00:11:14,009
So, uh, as soon
as you hear the music
243
00:11:14,029 --> 00:11:15,019
go ahead and start the show.
244
00:11:15,039 --> 00:11:18,000
[instrumental music]
245
00:11:20,190 --> 00:11:22,230
Good evening,
I'm Packed Thickly.
246
00:11:26,129 --> 00:11:29,039
This...is "Action News"
247
00:11:29,059 --> 00:11:31,080
and this is the top story.
248
00:11:31,100 --> 00:11:32,289
Drunken pigs have taken over
249
00:11:33,009 --> 00:11:35,250
the town of Hattiesburg,
Mississippi.
250
00:11:35,269 --> 00:11:37,159
Colin?
251
00:11:37,179 --> 00:11:39,139
You said that so nicely.
252
00:11:41,049 --> 00:11:42,149
You know,
if you're an
"X-files" fan
253
00:11:42,169 --> 00:11:45,029
you're into
conspiracies
and hidden secrets
254
00:11:45,049 --> 00:11:47,250
and...sometimes those
secrets
just have to come out!
255
00:11:49,039 --> 00:11:51,009
Sometimes..
256
00:11:51,029 --> 00:11:53,139
...there's something
unspoken
between two people
257
00:11:53,159 --> 00:11:55,090
maybe more on the side
of one person than the
other
258
00:11:55,110 --> 00:11:56,190
but I've gotta
tell you something,
Greg.
259
00:11:56,210 --> 00:12:00,080
Ever since I saw you at WPPL
260
00:12:00,100 --> 00:12:02,179
out there in
Omaha,
saying the news
261
00:12:02,200 --> 00:12:03,289
my heart just broke.
262
00:12:04,009 --> 00:12:06,019
My God, you're
beautiful!
Kiss me.
263
00:12:06,039 --> 00:12:07,289
Kiss me like you've never
kissed
an anchor before.
264
00:12:08,009 --> 00:12:09,000
I..
265
00:12:13,230 --> 00:12:17,100
My God! I am truly a man!
266
00:12:20,120 --> 00:12:23,070
Our second story,
Colin has come out.
267
00:12:23,090 --> 00:12:24,070
Now..
268
00:12:25,289 --> 00:12:28,159
It's time for sports.
269
00:12:28,179 --> 00:12:31,059
And I know I'm ready for some.
270
00:12:31,080 --> 00:12:32,279
Wayne..
271
00:12:33,000 --> 00:12:34,090
- Wayne!
- Huh? Huh?
272
00:12:34,110 --> 00:12:36,110
'Let us know what's going on
over in the sports world.'
273
00:12:36,129 --> 00:12:37,240
♪ What you want huh ♪
274
00:12:37,259 --> 00:12:39,139
♪ Got those right here huh ♪
275
00:12:39,159 --> 00:12:41,049
♪ Because the cardinals ♪
276
00:12:41,070 --> 00:12:43,000
♪ They didn't win
a baseball game huh ♪
277
00:12:43,019 --> 00:12:45,210
♪ Gotta get up huh huh
they gotta get up huh ♪
278
00:12:45,230 --> 00:12:48,190
♪ Because the score was 0-1
and he hit a goal huh ♪
279
00:12:48,210 --> 00:12:49,269
♪ A goal
he hit it huh ♪
280
00:12:49,289 --> 00:12:51,070
♪ Yeah they won
Hit me ♪
281
00:12:51,090 --> 00:12:52,070
♪ Yeah you did
you a bad mutha ♪
282
00:12:52,090 --> 00:12:53,139
♪ Shut your mouth ha ♪
283
00:12:53,159 --> 00:12:55,039
♪ Gotta hit a baseball now huh ♪
284
00:12:55,059 --> 00:12:56,110
♪ Can you feel it huh ♪
285
00:12:56,129 --> 00:12:58,090
♪ I can't do it I can't ah ♪
286
00:12:58,110 --> 00:12:59,269
♪ Yeah da da da huh ♪
287
00:12:59,289 --> 00:13:02,120
♪ Gotta get that ball huh
I gotta ow ♪
288
00:13:02,139 --> 00:13:04,029
♪ Can't I can't do it
I can't do it ♪
289
00:13:04,049 --> 00:13:05,250
♪ I can't do it
I can't do it ♪
290
00:13:05,269 --> 00:13:07,210
♪ Aww huh.. ♪
291
00:13:07,230 --> 00:13:09,110
One more time.
No, James, no.
292
00:13:09,129 --> 00:13:11,139
♪ I can't do it huh hey ♪♪
293
00:13:19,070 --> 00:13:21,000
I saw the way you looked at
him,
but I don't care.
294
00:13:21,019 --> 00:13:22,230
You're big
enough
for the both of
us.
295
00:13:22,250 --> 00:13:25,100
♪ You's a Froot Loop huh ♪♪
296
00:13:27,200 --> 00:13:30,009
Well, uh,
now it's time for weather.
297
00:13:30,029 --> 00:13:33,190
And let's go to Ryan over at
the big satellite weather map.
298
00:13:33,210 --> 00:13:35,169
'Ryan, what's on tap
this weekend?'
299
00:13:35,190 --> 00:13:37,029
Well, thank you, Packed.
300
00:13:37,049 --> 00:13:39,080
Thanks for remembering me
over here.
301
00:13:40,120 --> 00:13:44,009
Thank you very much, Packed.
302
00:13:44,029 --> 00:13:46,179
Well, we've got some,
uh,
cloudy, cloudy weather
303
00:13:46,200 --> 00:13:49,179
some bad weather coming in
in the next little while.
304
00:13:49,200 --> 00:13:52,169
And after seeing you naked
prancing around the house
305
00:13:52,190 --> 00:13:55,000
I've gotta say, we've got
some small craft warnings
306
00:13:55,019 --> 00:13:57,059
to be seen!
307
00:13:57,080 --> 00:13:59,080
We've got
some lightning coming
in
308
00:13:59,100 --> 00:14:01,019
and I hope it hits your house
309
00:14:01,039 --> 00:14:02,159
and fries you like a steak!
310
00:14:02,179 --> 00:14:03,179
You can do better than him
311
00:14:03,200 --> 00:14:05,179
you're way too good for him!
312
00:14:05,200 --> 00:14:07,279
Back to you, Packed.
313
00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:09,039
Well, thank you.
314
00:14:09,059 --> 00:14:10,190
[clears throat]
315
00:14:10,210 --> 00:14:12,149
That-that's been
the news this evening
316
00:14:12,169 --> 00:14:14,259
and I'm sure you've enjoyed it
as much as I am
317
00:14:14,279 --> 00:14:16,269
uh, have.
318
00:14:16,289 --> 00:14:20,090
Tune in, tune in..
319
00:14:20,110 --> 00:14:22,059
...tune in tomorrow
for "Love Muffins"
320
00:14:22,080 --> 00:14:24,059
our morning program.
321
00:14:24,080 --> 00:14:26,000
I'll be there with Colin
to explain everything.
322
00:14:26,019 --> 00:14:27,000
Goodnight, everyone.
323
00:14:27,019 --> 00:14:28,009
Whoo!
324
00:14:36,139 --> 00:14:38,019
A million and a half points
for Colin
325
00:14:38,039 --> 00:14:39,220
for kissing Greg Proops.
326
00:14:42,129 --> 00:14:44,029
Now we go on to a game called
327
00:14:44,049 --> 00:14:45,240
Greatest Hits, my favorite game.
328
00:14:45,259 --> 00:14:48,129
This is a game
for Colin, Ryan and Wayne
329
00:14:48,149 --> 00:14:50,070
'with the help of Laura Hall
on the keyboards.'
330
00:14:50,090 --> 00:14:51,289
'Laura Hall.'
331
00:14:52,009 --> 00:14:54,190
'Uh, Colin and Ryan, you're,
uh,
TV voice-over artists'
332
00:14:54,210 --> 00:14:56,070
and you're pitching
the latest compilation album
333
00:14:56,090 --> 00:14:58,279
and, Wayne, you're gonna sing,
uh, snippets of the songs.
334
00:14:59,000 --> 00:15:00,250
What we need from the audience
is a profession
335
00:15:00,269 --> 00:15:02,139
you wouldn't normally
sing songs about.
336
00:15:02,159 --> 00:15:04,159
[indistinct yelling]
337
00:15:04,179 --> 00:15:06,190
'Bus driver?'
338
00:15:06,210 --> 00:15:10,110
Bus driver. That's a good one.
339
00:15:10,129 --> 00:15:13,000
So the name of your album is
"Songs Of The Bus Driver."
340
00:15:15,220 --> 00:15:17,090
Hi, we interrupt the commercial
341
00:15:17,110 --> 00:15:19,269
to bring you another commercial.
342
00:15:19,289 --> 00:15:21,009
We've got an offer for you
343
00:15:21,029 --> 00:15:24,240
over 500 songs on 50 CDs.
344
00:15:24,259 --> 00:15:25,279
And what about?
345
00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:28,259
Why, our old
friend,
the bus driver.
346
00:15:28,279 --> 00:15:30,019
Throughout the ages
347
00:15:30,039 --> 00:15:32,210
well, at least the
ages
where we had buses
348
00:15:32,230 --> 00:15:34,139
the bus driver
has been our
friend
349
00:15:34,159 --> 00:15:36,059
and we've had songs
that went along
350
00:15:36,080 --> 00:15:37,149
with our bus driver friend.
351
00:15:37,169 --> 00:15:39,200
Remember this
352
00:15:39,220 --> 00:15:42,029
Michael Jackson hit
353
00:15:42,049 --> 00:15:44,009
"You're Not On My Root?"
354
00:15:45,240 --> 00:15:47,200
That'd be route? Route.
355
00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:51,259
[instrumental music]
356
00:15:55,250 --> 00:15:57,009
♪ Ah ah ♪
357
00:15:57,029 --> 00:16:00,120
♪ Ss uh-uh ♪
358
00:16:00,139 --> 00:16:02,220
♪ You want me to go north ♪
359
00:16:02,240 --> 00:16:04,210
♪ I'm goin' south ♪
360
00:16:04,230 --> 00:16:06,190
♪ You're not on my root ♪
361
00:16:06,210 --> 00:16:09,080
♪ I mean route
Hoo ♪
362
00:16:09,100 --> 00:16:13,080
♪ Girl you're buggin' me
you're makin' me scream ♪
363
00:16:13,100 --> 00:16:17,200
♪ Because you're not
a bus driver's dream ah ♪
364
00:16:17,220 --> 00:16:19,090
♪ I'm drivin' the bus ah ♪
365
00:16:19,110 --> 00:16:21,190
♪ There are people in the back ♪
366
00:16:21,210 --> 00:16:22,240
♪ Because where you're goin' ♪
367
00:16:22,259 --> 00:16:24,210
♪ Is a common sense
that you lack ♪
368
00:16:24,230 --> 00:16:27,169
♪ I'm not goin'
your root-route hoo ♪
369
00:16:27,190 --> 00:16:28,250
♪ I'm not your root-route ♪
370
00:16:28,269 --> 00:16:30,049
♪ Oh ♪
371
00:16:30,070 --> 00:16:32,090
♪ Your root-route huh ♪
372
00:16:32,110 --> 00:16:34,149
♪ Your root-route uh ♪♪
373
00:16:40,059 --> 00:16:42,049
Michael Jackson,
a wonderful singer
374
00:16:42,070 --> 00:16:43,240
and a great head coach.
375
00:16:43,259 --> 00:16:45,220
You know, there's a lot of songs
376
00:16:45,240 --> 00:16:47,090
'that you won't hear
in this country'
377
00:16:47,110 --> 00:16:49,220
'that we've taken from others.'
378
00:16:49,240 --> 00:16:52,129
How much would you pay
for a 5-CD set like this?
379
00:16:52,149 --> 00:16:54,279
Or even a 50-CD set like this?
380
00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:57,169
Why, I'd pay up to $50,000.
381
00:16:59,179 --> 00:17:01,139
But I'm an idiot!
382
00:17:04,069 --> 00:17:06,170
And you're from Canada,
so with the exchange..
383
00:17:06,190 --> 00:17:08,150
I'm still an idiot.
384
00:17:10,220 --> 00:17:13,289
There are so many hits
on this CD set
385
00:17:14,009 --> 00:17:16,130
that you can't listen to 'em
all
in one day
386
00:17:16,150 --> 00:17:17,240
but you can try.
387
00:17:17,259 --> 00:17:19,220
And you know,
none is more popular
388
00:17:19,240 --> 00:17:22,079
than that number-one
country-western hit
389
00:17:22,099 --> 00:17:24,109
simply titled, "Pfff!"
390
00:17:26,170 --> 00:17:29,130
[instrumental music]
391
00:17:30,190 --> 00:17:31,230
♪ Pfff ♪
392
00:17:34,170 --> 00:17:36,099
[blowing]
393
00:17:37,140 --> 00:17:38,130
[imitating bus door opening]
394
00:17:38,150 --> 00:17:41,119
[blowing]
395
00:17:41,140 --> 00:17:42,220
[imitating bus door opening]
396
00:17:42,240 --> 00:17:44,069
[imitating bus honking]
397
00:17:44,089 --> 00:17:45,079
♪ Come on come on ♪♪
398
00:17:45,099 --> 00:17:46,119
[imitating bus door opening]
399
00:17:46,140 --> 00:17:47,099
[blowing]
400
00:17:49,059 --> 00:17:50,200
Ting. Crink.
401
00:17:55,029 --> 00:17:56,099
Come on!
402
00:17:58,009 --> 00:18:00,269
[crowd cheering]
403
00:18:03,259 --> 00:18:05,109
You know,
when driving on the
bus
404
00:18:05,130 --> 00:18:07,250
or as our Canadian friends
say,
a boose..
405
00:18:11,089 --> 00:18:12,130
As our regular viewers know--
406
00:18:12,150 --> 00:18:15,019
- You've made me giggle.
- I know.
407
00:18:15,039 --> 00:18:19,000
As our regular viewers know,
I'm a pretty hip, groovy guy.
408
00:18:19,019 --> 00:18:22,220
- And I love the '80s funk.
- Oh, who doesn't?
409
00:18:22,240 --> 00:18:24,029
Remember that great one?
410
00:18:24,049 --> 00:18:27,079
"I Got A Flat Tire."
"I Got A Flat Tire."
411
00:18:27,099 --> 00:18:30,059
[instrumental music]
412
00:18:36,220 --> 00:18:39,289
♪ Man I didn't think
that I'd be alive ♪
413
00:18:40,009 --> 00:18:43,230
♪ Driving down the 405 ♪
414
00:18:43,250 --> 00:18:47,019
♪ All of a sudden just like
that
my bus went ♪
415
00:18:47,039 --> 00:18:48,150
[imitating tires screeching]
416
00:18:48,170 --> 00:18:50,200
♪ Damn I gots a flat ♪
417
00:18:50,220 --> 00:18:52,140
♪ Oh that's right ♪
418
00:18:52,160 --> 00:18:54,210
♪ Makes me want to retire ♪
419
00:18:54,230 --> 00:18:57,140
♪ Yeah baby
I've got a flat tire ♪
420
00:18:57,160 --> 00:19:00,059
♪ I've got flat uh
a flat uh ♪
421
00:19:00,079 --> 00:19:02,279
♪ You know I do
I've got a flat ♪
422
00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:05,000
♪ Say what
I've got a flat ♪
423
00:19:05,019 --> 00:19:07,049
♪ Oww ♪♪
424
00:19:07,069 --> 00:19:10,029
[crowd cheering]
425
00:19:12,049 --> 00:19:14,079
- Yeah.
- It was too good.
426
00:19:14,099 --> 00:19:15,250
(Drew)
'Man, oh, man.'
427
00:19:24,049 --> 00:19:26,089
Hey, don't go anywhere
'cause when we come back
428
00:19:26,109 --> 00:19:27,119
to "Whose Line Is It Anyway?"
429
00:19:27,140 --> 00:19:28,180
we're gonna find out
who the winner is
430
00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:30,119
and we're gonna do
some improv with them
431
00:19:30,140 --> 00:19:32,099
so stay right where you are.
432
00:19:37,160 --> 00:19:39,170
Hey, welcome back
to "Whose Line Is It Anyway?"
433
00:19:39,190 --> 00:19:41,049
Tonight's winners
are Ryan and Greg.
434
00:19:41,069 --> 00:19:43,160
Ryan and Greg are the winners.
435
00:19:43,180 --> 00:19:45,210
Thank you, Ryan and Greg.
436
00:19:45,230 --> 00:19:47,220
And they're gonna play a game
with me called News Flash.
437
00:19:47,240 --> 00:19:50,000
What happens in News Flash
is they're news people
438
00:19:50,019 --> 00:19:51,000
in a newsroom.
439
00:19:51,019 --> 00:19:52,170
I'm gonna be the guy
that's in the field.
440
00:19:52,190 --> 00:19:55,109
I'm gonna stand right over
here
in front of this green screen
441
00:19:55,130 --> 00:19:56,160
and the trick of this game is
442
00:19:56,180 --> 00:19:58,049
I don't know
what's on the green screen
443
00:19:58,069 --> 00:20:00,150
and, uh, only the people
watching the monitor know.
444
00:20:00,170 --> 00:20:01,240
So I can't see
the monitors anywhere
445
00:20:01,259 --> 00:20:03,069
and I have to try to guess
446
00:20:03,089 --> 00:20:05,089
what's on the green screen
during the course of the game.
447
00:20:05,109 --> 00:20:07,079
So, uh, Ryan and Greg
448
00:20:07,099 --> 00:20:09,009
whenever you're ready,
take it away.
449
00:20:09,029 --> 00:20:12,099
- I'm Thomas Guide.
- And I'm Mark the page.
450
00:20:12,119 --> 00:20:14,029
And we've got Drew Carey
out in the field.
451
00:20:14,049 --> 00:20:15,200
Drew, can you hear us, Drew?
452
00:20:15,220 --> 00:20:17,119
Uh, yeah,
I can hear you fine.
453
00:20:17,140 --> 00:20:19,259
Uh, it's a little windy in
here,
a little noisy
454
00:20:19,279 --> 00:20:21,190
but I can hear you pretty good.
455
00:20:21,210 --> 00:20:23,190
(Greg)
'Really? How are you feeling
right now?'
456
00:20:23,210 --> 00:20:25,160
'Has there been any change?'
457
00:20:25,180 --> 00:20:28,029
Uh, uh, there's been
a quite a bit of excitement
458
00:20:28,049 --> 00:20:29,240
since this morning, the, uh..
459
00:20:29,259 --> 00:20:31,029
Boy, people
are drinking like crazy
460
00:20:31,049 --> 00:20:32,200
let me tell you that.
461
00:20:32,220 --> 00:20:35,250
(Ryan)
'Drew, Drew, are you in any
sort
of danger at the moment?'
462
00:20:35,269 --> 00:20:36,259
Uh, no, not that I know of.
463
00:20:36,279 --> 00:20:38,089
They seem to like me pretty much
464
00:20:38,109 --> 00:20:40,250
and, uh, they like my deodorant
465
00:20:40,269 --> 00:20:43,069
so they're pretty much leaving
me alone, uh, whoever it is.
466
00:20:43,089 --> 00:20:46,150
(Greg)
'Can you characterize
your feelings right now?'
467
00:20:46,170 --> 00:20:49,049
I feel very...alone.
468
00:20:50,119 --> 00:20:51,099
Uh..
469
00:20:53,160 --> 00:20:55,240
Alone and lonely.
470
00:20:55,259 --> 00:20:59,160
Drew, you're the king
in our book, you know
that!
471
00:20:59,180 --> 00:21:02,119
(Greg)
'Do you have any solutions
personally for this?'
472
00:21:02,140 --> 00:21:03,269
Oh, no, I leave that
up to the experts.
473
00:21:03,289 --> 00:21:05,029
I don't try to tell people
what to do.
474
00:21:05,049 --> 00:21:08,079
I'm just
a lonely, country reporter.
475
00:21:08,099 --> 00:21:09,160
(Ryan)
'Well, Drew, you..'
476
00:21:09,180 --> 00:21:10,240
Drew, do you have any idea
477
00:21:10,259 --> 00:21:13,049
whether it's a red
bum
or a blue bum?
478
00:21:15,190 --> 00:21:18,089
Is there monkeys behind me?
Chimpanzees?
479
00:21:18,109 --> 00:21:21,160
(Greg)
'Do you have any idea?
Take a, take a big guess.'
480
00:21:21,180 --> 00:21:23,279
Alright, there's a giant
King Kong or something, right?
481
00:21:24,000 --> 00:21:25,109
[crowd cheering]
Oh!
482
00:21:25,130 --> 00:21:26,240
[buzzer buzzes]
483
00:21:26,259 --> 00:21:27,250
I can't believe I lucked out.
484
00:21:27,269 --> 00:21:29,240
Hey, thanks for watching
485
00:21:29,259 --> 00:21:31,079
"Whose Line Is It Anyway?"
486
00:21:31,099 --> 00:21:32,079
Goodnight!
487
00:21:35,009 --> 00:21:37,160
[theme music]
33278
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