All language subtitles for Whose Line Is It Anyway! (US) - S01E03 - Greg Proops WEBDL-1080p_Subtítulos01.ENG

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,040 --> 00:00:03,069 (Drew) 'Good evening and welcome' 2 00:00:03,089 --> 00:00:05,049 'to "Whose Line Is It Anyway?"' 3 00:00:05,070 --> 00:00:06,099 'Tonight's performers.' 4 00:00:06,120 --> 00:00:07,240 'Whatever you do, don't step in him' 5 00:00:07,259 --> 00:00:09,019 'Greg Proops.' 6 00:00:09,039 --> 00:00:12,130 'If you're a lady, you gotta love Wayne Brady.' 7 00:00:12,150 --> 00:00:15,050 'Science experiment gone wrong, Colin Mochrie' 8 00:00:15,070 --> 00:00:18,089 'and his fiendish creator, Ryan Stiles!' 9 00:00:18,109 --> 00:00:19,160 And I'm your host, Drew Carey. 10 00:00:19,179 --> 00:00:21,140 Come on down. Let's have some fun. 11 00:00:28,019 --> 00:00:29,179 Hey, welcome to "Whose Line Is It Anyway?" 12 00:00:29,199 --> 00:00:30,179 the show where everything's made up 13 00:00:30,199 --> 00:00:32,009 and the points don't matter. 14 00:00:32,030 --> 00:00:34,219 Hope you enjoyed watching "The Drew Carey Show" just now. 15 00:00:34,240 --> 00:00:35,250 Uh.. 16 00:00:37,210 --> 00:00:39,219 If you've never seen this show before, what happens is 17 00:00:39,240 --> 00:00:42,070 these guys are gonna come down, they're gonna come down on stage 18 00:00:42,090 --> 00:00:43,219 and they're gonna totally improvise 19 00:00:43,240 --> 00:00:44,229 everything you're gonna see tonight. 20 00:00:44,250 --> 00:00:46,109 It's all made up right on the spot 21 00:00:46,130 --> 00:00:48,009 and they go by suggestions that we have 22 00:00:48,030 --> 00:00:50,170 that they've never seen before, and also audience suggestions 23 00:00:50,189 --> 00:00:52,200 and then I give them points, uh, for no reason 24 00:00:52,219 --> 00:00:55,020 because at the end of the show I just pick the guy I like best. 25 00:00:55,039 --> 00:00:58,090 And, uh...they get to do something with me. 26 00:01:01,100 --> 00:01:02,079 So maybe the points are more important 27 00:01:02,100 --> 00:01:03,140 than I thought they were. 28 00:01:03,159 --> 00:01:06,099 Uh, you ready to do the first game, see how it goes? 29 00:01:06,120 --> 00:01:07,120 'Okay.' 30 00:01:11,049 --> 00:01:13,079 The first game is called Let's Make A Date. 31 00:01:13,099 --> 00:01:14,159 It's a game for all four of you. 32 00:01:14,180 --> 00:01:15,289 'Uh, Ryan, Colin and Wayne' 33 00:01:16,010 --> 00:01:18,030 'you're gonna be contestants on a dating-type show' 34 00:01:18,049 --> 00:01:19,090 hoping to be picked by the handsome 35 00:01:19,109 --> 00:01:21,109 and nattily dressed Greg. 36 00:01:21,129 --> 00:01:23,019 [crowd cheering] 37 00:01:23,039 --> 00:01:24,180 - Okay. - 'Oh, yeah.' 38 00:01:24,200 --> 00:01:26,289 (Drew) 'Each of you, uh, is gonna be given a strange characteristic' 39 00:01:27,010 --> 00:01:29,019 'or, uh, identity. It's on the cards there.' 40 00:01:29,039 --> 00:01:31,230 They haven't seen these cards before, uh, just now 41 00:01:31,250 --> 00:01:33,170 and Greg's gonna question them like they do on a dating show 42 00:01:33,189 --> 00:01:35,069 and try to figure out who he wants to go out with. 43 00:01:35,090 --> 00:01:38,150 So, uh, Greg, when you're ready, go to it. 44 00:01:38,170 --> 00:01:41,129 Contestant number one, hi. 45 00:01:43,090 --> 00:01:45,270 [in French accent] Bonjour. 46 00:01:45,289 --> 00:01:47,120 Yeah, how are you? 47 00:01:47,140 --> 00:01:50,219 I am fine, but not as fine as you. 48 00:01:53,060 --> 00:01:54,090 [imitating Maurice Chevalier] Oh, ho-ho. 49 00:01:54,109 --> 00:01:57,270 Oh-oh-oh, uh-huh, huh. 50 00:01:57,289 --> 00:01:59,060 (Greg) 'Uh, wow.' 51 00:01:59,079 --> 00:02:01,170 - Contestant number two. - 'Yes.' 52 00:02:01,189 --> 00:02:02,280 - Hello! - Hello. 53 00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:04,010 - 'Hi.' - Hi. 54 00:02:04,030 --> 00:02:06,060 - 'Hi.' - Hi. 55 00:02:06,079 --> 00:02:07,250 (Greg) 'I heart eating.' 56 00:02:07,269 --> 00:02:09,120 'Uh, if we are gonna go out on a date' 57 00:02:09,139 --> 00:02:10,210 'where might you take me to eat?' 58 00:02:10,229 --> 00:02:12,009 Well.. 59 00:02:12,030 --> 00:02:14,020 Excuse me, I.. 60 00:02:14,039 --> 00:02:15,250 Take you to eat.. 61 00:02:17,240 --> 00:02:20,229 [slurring] Well, I'd probably take you to a restaurant 62 00:02:20,250 --> 00:02:22,210 'cause that's where the food is! 63 00:02:26,180 --> 00:02:29,069 ♪ Going to the restaurant ♪ 64 00:02:29,090 --> 00:02:31,139 ♪ Going to the restaurant ♪ 65 00:02:31,159 --> 00:02:34,079 ♪ We're gonna go to the rest ♪♪ 66 00:02:37,280 --> 00:02:39,090 You sound hecka fun. 67 00:02:39,110 --> 00:02:41,110 Uh, contestant number three. 68 00:02:41,129 --> 00:02:43,050 - 'How are ya?' - 'Good. How are you?' 69 00:02:43,069 --> 00:02:45,030 [in Southern accent] I'm very good, thank you. 70 00:02:46,150 --> 00:02:48,090 I love the out of doors. 71 00:02:48,110 --> 00:02:49,259 If we were gonna.. Yeah. 72 00:02:49,280 --> 00:02:52,050 If we were gonna go somewhere, uh, you know, outside 73 00:02:52,069 --> 00:02:53,060 'where-where would you go?' 74 00:02:53,079 --> 00:02:55,120 Well, I've never been inside 75 00:02:55,139 --> 00:02:57,129 so, uh.. 76 00:02:57,150 --> 00:02:59,110 [Drew laughs] 77 00:03:00,289 --> 00:03:03,159 I don't know, we might roll around in the mud for a while. 78 00:03:03,180 --> 00:03:05,139 I'll take good care of you, you wouldn't get hurt 79 00:03:05,159 --> 00:03:07,120 you have to take me to the court and sue. 80 00:03:07,139 --> 00:03:09,229 Sue, sue! 81 00:03:09,250 --> 00:03:12,000 - Sue! - Sue! 82 00:03:14,159 --> 00:03:16,270 [laughs] 83 00:03:16,289 --> 00:03:19,180 Ah, contestant number un. 84 00:03:19,199 --> 00:03:20,180 - 'Oh.' - Uh.. 85 00:03:20,199 --> 00:03:22,259 [Drew laughs] 86 00:03:22,280 --> 00:03:24,090 I love the night life. 87 00:03:24,110 --> 00:03:25,139 I like to boogie. 88 00:03:25,159 --> 00:03:27,139 Um, where would you take me 89 00:03:27,159 --> 00:03:29,180 if we were gonna go out dancing? 90 00:03:29,199 --> 00:03:31,250 [in French accent] I would take you to the top of the moon 91 00:03:31,270 --> 00:03:33,259 and then I would spin you around a crater 92 00:03:33,280 --> 00:03:35,229 and slap your lunar surface. 93 00:03:35,250 --> 00:03:38,210 [crowd cheering] 94 00:03:50,060 --> 00:03:52,120 Number two. 95 00:03:52,139 --> 00:03:55,129 Uh, if you were a carpenter.. 96 00:03:55,150 --> 00:03:58,259 '...would you rather use a drill or a hammer?' 97 00:03:58,280 --> 00:04:00,280 I love you. 98 00:04:02,039 --> 00:04:04,189 You're great! You're just.. 99 00:04:04,210 --> 00:04:06,169 [retching] 100 00:04:08,020 --> 00:04:10,280 [crowd cheering] 101 00:04:25,180 --> 00:04:27,029 I didn't hear the last part. 102 00:04:27,050 --> 00:04:30,199 Um...number three 103 00:04:30,220 --> 00:04:32,000 if I were mashed potatoes 104 00:04:32,019 --> 00:04:33,279 'what would you spoon over me?' 105 00:04:37,259 --> 00:04:39,279 Oh, I'm sorry, I was.. 106 00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:41,259 ...thinkin' about something else. 107 00:04:49,040 --> 00:04:50,139 [buzzer buzzes] 108 00:04:50,159 --> 00:04:52,220 Okay, uh, Greg, you wanna guess who they are? 109 00:04:52,240 --> 00:04:55,120 Is it hot in here, Drew, or is it just me? 110 00:04:55,139 --> 00:04:57,129 'Uh, number one is a French guy' 111 00:04:57,149 --> 00:04:58,290 'but he's, there's something about the moon.' 112 00:04:59,009 --> 00:05:01,050 'He's a French astronaut of some kind?' 113 00:05:01,069 --> 00:05:04,160 He's a, he's a romantic French guy with.. 114 00:05:04,180 --> 00:05:06,079 (Drew) 'Greatest lover in France.' 115 00:05:06,100 --> 00:05:08,290 He's the greatest lover in France. 116 00:05:09,009 --> 00:05:11,139 And Colin is my Uncle Ted. 117 00:05:11,160 --> 00:05:14,079 Yes, it's your Uncle Ted! How'd you guess? 118 00:05:14,100 --> 00:05:16,079 Well, how'd you guess that.. 119 00:05:16,100 --> 00:05:19,160 And number three is someone who was in the.. 120 00:05:19,180 --> 00:05:21,240 'He's a country guy from the cast of "Deliverance."' 121 00:05:21,259 --> 00:05:23,160 Hog caller, he's a hog caller 122 00:05:23,180 --> 00:05:25,120 uh, who loves other things. 123 00:05:25,139 --> 00:05:28,060 He's a pig, he's a pig farmer from Arkansas. 124 00:05:28,079 --> 00:05:30,040 - 'Of course he is.' - 'Okay.' 125 00:05:30,269 --> 00:05:31,279 Thank you. 126 00:05:37,110 --> 00:05:39,079 And I gotta give a 1000 points to Ryan 127 00:05:39,100 --> 00:05:41,000 for reading my mind. 128 00:05:41,019 --> 00:05:43,279 [laughing] 129 00:05:46,060 --> 00:05:49,149 Alright. Now we come to a game called Scene To Rap. 130 00:05:49,170 --> 00:05:52,009 In this game, Greg and Wayne, you're gonna make up a scene 131 00:05:52,029 --> 00:05:54,040 'and you'll be joined later by Ryan and Colin' 132 00:05:54,060 --> 00:05:55,209 'and, uh, you're all gonna be rapping' 133 00:05:55,230 --> 00:05:57,230 accompanied by mix master, Laura Hall. 134 00:06:00,250 --> 00:06:02,050 Uh, we need a suggestion from the audience 135 00:06:02,069 --> 00:06:03,110 a place where people work. 136 00:06:03,129 --> 00:06:05,230 - A hospital. - Hospital. Okay, good one. 137 00:06:05,250 --> 00:06:07,089 Uh, rapping about the hospital 138 00:06:07,110 --> 00:06:09,050 and, uh, whenever you're ready, go. 139 00:06:09,069 --> 00:06:11,069 [instrumental music] 140 00:06:11,089 --> 00:06:14,250 ♪ Beep beep beep beep ♪ 141 00:06:14,269 --> 00:06:16,050 ♪ Boop boop boop ♪ ♪ Ooh ♪ 142 00:06:16,069 --> 00:06:20,069 ♪ Uh-oh ooh uh-oh ooh ♪ 143 00:06:20,089 --> 00:06:21,269 ♪ Well there we go that's that ♪ 144 00:06:21,290 --> 00:06:24,029 ♪ We better call the nurse right up here stat ♪ 145 00:06:24,050 --> 00:06:26,089 ♪ Because this guy he might lose his life race ♪ 146 00:06:26,110 --> 00:06:28,149 ♪ Because you see he is a terminal case ♪ 147 00:06:28,170 --> 00:06:30,199 ♪ We need the doc and we need a nurse ♪ 148 00:06:30,220 --> 00:06:32,170 ♪ Hurry to it stat man I can't rehearse ♪ 149 00:06:32,189 --> 00:06:34,279 ♪ We gotta save his life he has kids and wife ♪ 150 00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:37,100 ♪ And if we're not careful he'll go under the knife ♪ 151 00:06:37,120 --> 00:06:39,110 ♪ Oh okay so he's gonna die ♪ 152 00:06:39,129 --> 00:06:41,199 ♪ But I gotta ask myself why ♪ 153 00:06:41,220 --> 00:06:43,240 ♪ I don't know why I'm here I'm a neurologist ♪ 154 00:06:43,259 --> 00:06:45,269 ♪ I'm with you and you're a proctologist ♪ 155 00:06:45,290 --> 00:06:48,000 ♪ I'll get the nurse but it's okay ♪ 156 00:06:48,019 --> 00:06:50,019 ♪ I'm gonna get the nurse hey hey hey hey ♪ 157 00:06:50,040 --> 00:06:52,029 ♪ Hey hey hey ♪ ♪ Well I'm a doctor on the go ♪ 158 00:06:52,050 --> 00:06:54,199 ♪ And oddly enough my name is Dr. No ♪ 159 00:06:54,220 --> 00:06:56,129 ♪ If I could rap that would be a sensation ♪ 160 00:06:56,149 --> 00:06:57,159 ♪ But I can't you see ♪ 161 00:06:57,180 --> 00:06:59,149 ♪ I'm just a Caucasian say huh ♪ 162 00:06:59,170 --> 00:07:02,009 ♪ Say huh say huh ♪ 163 00:07:02,029 --> 00:07:04,009 ♪ Say huh ♪ ♪ That's all I can do say huh ♪ 164 00:07:04,029 --> 00:07:06,259 ♪ Say huh say huh ♪ ♪ Can't rap ♪ 165 00:07:06,279 --> 00:07:09,220 ♪ Now we need some help pronto ♪ 166 00:07:09,240 --> 00:07:12,000 ♪ Or else this man's life will soon go ♪ 167 00:07:12,019 --> 00:07:14,040 ♪ Can't you do anything Won't you please ♪ 168 00:07:14,060 --> 00:07:16,060 ♪ Because I'm beggin' you please please please ♪ 169 00:07:16,079 --> 00:07:18,079 ♪ Well I know he's a man so he don't need a pap ♪ 170 00:07:18,100 --> 00:07:20,189 ♪ But I'll take these two things and zap zap zap ♪ 171 00:07:20,209 --> 00:07:22,170 [imitating voltage through CPR paddles] 172 00:07:25,060 --> 00:07:27,029 ♪ Hey there buddies look at him ♪ 173 00:07:27,050 --> 00:07:29,120 ♪ He's dead he's dead and his name is Jim ♪ 174 00:07:29,139 --> 00:07:31,149 ♪ What once was is no longer were ♪ 175 00:07:31,170 --> 00:07:33,129 ♪ He's comin' with me I'm the Grim Reaper ♪♪ 176 00:07:40,269 --> 00:07:42,149 [buzzer buzzes] 177 00:07:44,250 --> 00:07:45,240 Yeah! 178 00:07:53,050 --> 00:07:55,279 Uh-oh, 1000 points for Wayne 179 00:07:56,000 --> 00:07:57,259 'cause the ladies love the way he walks. 180 00:07:57,279 --> 00:08:00,120 [women hooting] 181 00:08:00,139 --> 00:08:02,000 Now let's play a game called Hats. 182 00:08:02,019 --> 00:08:03,079 This is for all four of you. 183 00:08:03,100 --> 00:08:05,019 'Uh, Ryan and Colin, come get your box of hats.' 184 00:08:05,040 --> 00:08:07,069 Greg and Wayne, come get your box of hats. 185 00:08:07,089 --> 00:08:09,069 Get your boxes, take them to your little corners. 186 00:08:09,089 --> 00:08:10,199 - Can you get that, Colin? - Yeah. 187 00:08:10,220 --> 00:08:13,139 [Drew laughs] 188 00:08:13,160 --> 00:08:15,129 'Okay, this game goes back and forth really quick' 189 00:08:15,149 --> 00:08:16,180 'and, uh, they have to use' 190 00:08:16,199 --> 00:08:18,120 as many hats as they can in the box 191 00:08:18,139 --> 00:08:20,029 to come up with as many examples as possible 192 00:08:20,050 --> 00:08:22,279 of the world's worst dating service video. 193 00:08:25,019 --> 00:08:27,069 Start with Colin and Ryan, anytime you're ready. 194 00:08:33,250 --> 00:08:36,059 Care to be a Knight Rider? 195 00:08:36,080 --> 00:08:37,070 [buzzer buzzes] 196 00:08:39,179 --> 00:08:42,159 I haven't had it in four score and seven years. 197 00:08:42,179 --> 00:08:43,250 [buzzer buzzes] 198 00:08:47,049 --> 00:08:50,029 All I want is a few merry men. 199 00:08:50,049 --> 00:08:51,009 [buzzer buzzes] 200 00:08:53,259 --> 00:08:55,289 I'm into safe sex. 201 00:08:56,009 --> 00:08:57,009 [buzzer buzzes] 202 00:09:03,009 --> 00:09:04,269 And that's just my hat. 203 00:09:07,009 --> 00:09:08,129 [buzzer buzzes] 204 00:09:12,049 --> 00:09:14,279 My last boyfriend gave me Hermes. 205 00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:16,100 [buzzer buzzes] 206 00:09:21,080 --> 00:09:23,000 You got me, babe. 207 00:09:24,240 --> 00:09:25,220 [buzzer buzzes] 208 00:09:28,269 --> 00:09:31,029 Um, hi, I'm the star of my own ABC sitcom-- 209 00:09:31,049 --> 00:09:34,009 [buzzer buzzes] 210 00:09:35,179 --> 00:09:38,080 [buzzer buzzes] 211 00:09:38,100 --> 00:09:40,100 Lewis! Lewis! 212 00:09:43,179 --> 00:09:46,049 And you don't need to worry, I'm a Trojan! 213 00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:48,139 [buzzer buzzes] 214 00:09:54,000 --> 00:09:55,259 I'm looking for a girl 215 00:09:55,279 --> 00:09:57,240 who can keep her mouth shut. 216 00:09:59,259 --> 00:10:00,230 [buzzer buzzes] 217 00:10:03,120 --> 00:10:05,080 Care to be touched by an angel? 218 00:10:06,200 --> 00:10:07,169 [buzzer buzzes] 219 00:10:09,049 --> 00:10:11,139 I'm looking for one good woman who's willing to fight. 220 00:10:11,159 --> 00:10:13,190 Are you willing to fight? I'll represent you! 221 00:10:13,210 --> 00:10:14,190 [buzzer buzzes] 222 00:10:15,279 --> 00:10:17,240 Thank you very much! 223 00:10:20,259 --> 00:10:22,070 Hey, don't go away 224 00:10:22,090 --> 00:10:23,279 we'll be right back right after these messages 225 00:10:24,000 --> 00:10:26,100 for more "Whose Line Is It Anyway?" 226 00:10:32,070 --> 00:10:35,059 Hey, welcome back to "Whose Line Is It Anyway?" 227 00:10:35,080 --> 00:10:38,000 the show where everything's made up and the points don't matter. 228 00:10:38,019 --> 00:10:39,080 Nice to have you back, and, hey 229 00:10:39,100 --> 00:10:40,279 if you're watching on a TV that's made in America 230 00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:43,200 we're all naked right now. 231 00:10:43,220 --> 00:10:46,059 Uh, now we come to a game that's called Weird Newscasters. 232 00:10:46,080 --> 00:10:47,159 This is for all four of you. 233 00:10:47,179 --> 00:10:49,220 'Uh, Greg, you're gonna be anchor of a news program' 234 00:10:49,240 --> 00:10:50,259 'and Colin, Wayne and Ryan' 235 00:10:50,279 --> 00:10:52,070 'are gonna help him out on the show.' 236 00:10:52,090 --> 00:10:54,250 'Uh, Greg, your co-anchor is Colin' 237 00:10:54,269 --> 00:10:57,289 and Colin, you can no longer hide his love for Greg. 238 00:11:01,210 --> 00:11:03,070 'And the sportscaster is Wayne.' 239 00:11:03,090 --> 00:11:05,139 Wayne, you're gonna be doing James Brown. 240 00:11:06,269 --> 00:11:09,159 'Oh...and the weatherman is Ryan.' 241 00:11:09,179 --> 00:11:12,200 'Ryan, you're the anchor's angry neighbor.' 242 00:11:12,220 --> 00:11:14,009 So, uh, as soon as you hear the music 243 00:11:14,029 --> 00:11:15,019 go ahead and start the show. 244 00:11:15,039 --> 00:11:18,000 [instrumental music] 245 00:11:20,190 --> 00:11:22,230 Good evening, I'm Packed Thickly. 246 00:11:26,129 --> 00:11:29,039 This...is "Action News" 247 00:11:29,059 --> 00:11:31,080 and this is the top story. 248 00:11:31,100 --> 00:11:32,289 Drunken pigs have taken over 249 00:11:33,009 --> 00:11:35,250 the town of Hattiesburg, Mississippi. 250 00:11:35,269 --> 00:11:37,159 Colin? 251 00:11:37,179 --> 00:11:39,139 You said that so nicely. 252 00:11:41,049 --> 00:11:42,149 You know, if you're an "X-files" fan 253 00:11:42,169 --> 00:11:45,029 you're into conspiracies and hidden secrets 254 00:11:45,049 --> 00:11:47,250 and...sometimes those secrets just have to come out! 255 00:11:49,039 --> 00:11:51,009 Sometimes.. 256 00:11:51,029 --> 00:11:53,139 ...there's something unspoken between two people 257 00:11:53,159 --> 00:11:55,090 maybe more on the side of one person than the other 258 00:11:55,110 --> 00:11:56,190 but I've gotta tell you something, Greg. 259 00:11:56,210 --> 00:12:00,080 Ever since I saw you at WPPL 260 00:12:00,100 --> 00:12:02,179 out there in Omaha, saying the news 261 00:12:02,200 --> 00:12:03,289 my heart just broke. 262 00:12:04,009 --> 00:12:06,019 My God, you're beautiful! Kiss me. 263 00:12:06,039 --> 00:12:07,289 Kiss me like you've never kissed an anchor before. 264 00:12:08,009 --> 00:12:09,000 I.. 265 00:12:13,230 --> 00:12:17,100 My God! I am truly a man! 266 00:12:20,120 --> 00:12:23,070 Our second story, Colin has come out. 267 00:12:23,090 --> 00:12:24,070 Now.. 268 00:12:25,289 --> 00:12:28,159 It's time for sports. 269 00:12:28,179 --> 00:12:31,059 And I know I'm ready for some. 270 00:12:31,080 --> 00:12:32,279 Wayne.. 271 00:12:33,000 --> 00:12:34,090 - Wayne! - Huh? Huh? 272 00:12:34,110 --> 00:12:36,110 'Let us know what's going on over in the sports world.' 273 00:12:36,129 --> 00:12:37,240 ♪ What you want huh ♪ 274 00:12:37,259 --> 00:12:39,139 ♪ Got those right here huh ♪ 275 00:12:39,159 --> 00:12:41,049 ♪ Because the cardinals ♪ 276 00:12:41,070 --> 00:12:43,000 ♪ They didn't win a baseball game huh ♪ 277 00:12:43,019 --> 00:12:45,210 ♪ Gotta get up huh huh they gotta get up huh ♪ 278 00:12:45,230 --> 00:12:48,190 ♪ Because the score was 0-1 and he hit a goal huh ♪ 279 00:12:48,210 --> 00:12:49,269 ♪ A goal he hit it huh ♪ 280 00:12:49,289 --> 00:12:51,070 ♪ Yeah they won Hit me ♪ 281 00:12:51,090 --> 00:12:52,070 ♪ Yeah you did you a bad mutha ♪ 282 00:12:52,090 --> 00:12:53,139 ♪ Shut your mouth ha ♪ 283 00:12:53,159 --> 00:12:55,039 ♪ Gotta hit a baseball now huh ♪ 284 00:12:55,059 --> 00:12:56,110 ♪ Can you feel it huh ♪ 285 00:12:56,129 --> 00:12:58,090 ♪ I can't do it I can't ah ♪ 286 00:12:58,110 --> 00:12:59,269 ♪ Yeah da da da huh ♪ 287 00:12:59,289 --> 00:13:02,120 ♪ Gotta get that ball huh I gotta ow ♪ 288 00:13:02,139 --> 00:13:04,029 ♪ Can't I can't do it I can't do it ♪ 289 00:13:04,049 --> 00:13:05,250 ♪ I can't do it I can't do it ♪ 290 00:13:05,269 --> 00:13:07,210 ♪ Aww huh.. ♪ 291 00:13:07,230 --> 00:13:09,110 One more time. No, James, no. 292 00:13:09,129 --> 00:13:11,139 ♪ I can't do it huh hey ♪♪ 293 00:13:19,070 --> 00:13:21,000 I saw the way you looked at him, but I don't care. 294 00:13:21,019 --> 00:13:22,230 You're big enough for the both of us. 295 00:13:22,250 --> 00:13:25,100 ♪ You's a Froot Loop huh ♪♪ 296 00:13:27,200 --> 00:13:30,009 Well, uh, now it's time for weather. 297 00:13:30,029 --> 00:13:33,190 And let's go to Ryan over at the big satellite weather map. 298 00:13:33,210 --> 00:13:35,169 'Ryan, what's on tap this weekend?' 299 00:13:35,190 --> 00:13:37,029 Well, thank you, Packed. 300 00:13:37,049 --> 00:13:39,080 Thanks for remembering me over here. 301 00:13:40,120 --> 00:13:44,009 Thank you very much, Packed. 302 00:13:44,029 --> 00:13:46,179 Well, we've got some, uh, cloudy, cloudy weather 303 00:13:46,200 --> 00:13:49,179 some bad weather coming in in the next little while. 304 00:13:49,200 --> 00:13:52,169 And after seeing you naked prancing around the house 305 00:13:52,190 --> 00:13:55,000 I've gotta say, we've got some small craft warnings 306 00:13:55,019 --> 00:13:57,059 to be seen! 307 00:13:57,080 --> 00:13:59,080 We've got some lightning coming in 308 00:13:59,100 --> 00:14:01,019 and I hope it hits your house 309 00:14:01,039 --> 00:14:02,159 and fries you like a steak! 310 00:14:02,179 --> 00:14:03,179 You can do better than him 311 00:14:03,200 --> 00:14:05,179 you're way too good for him! 312 00:14:05,200 --> 00:14:07,279 Back to you, Packed. 313 00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:09,039 Well, thank you. 314 00:14:09,059 --> 00:14:10,190 [clears throat] 315 00:14:10,210 --> 00:14:12,149 That-that's been the news this evening 316 00:14:12,169 --> 00:14:14,259 and I'm sure you've enjoyed it as much as I am 317 00:14:14,279 --> 00:14:16,269 uh, have. 318 00:14:16,289 --> 00:14:20,090 Tune in, tune in.. 319 00:14:20,110 --> 00:14:22,059 ...tune in tomorrow for "Love Muffins" 320 00:14:22,080 --> 00:14:24,059 our morning program. 321 00:14:24,080 --> 00:14:26,000 I'll be there with Colin to explain everything. 322 00:14:26,019 --> 00:14:27,000 Goodnight, everyone. 323 00:14:27,019 --> 00:14:28,009 Whoo! 324 00:14:36,139 --> 00:14:38,019 A million and a half points for Colin 325 00:14:38,039 --> 00:14:39,220 for kissing Greg Proops. 326 00:14:42,129 --> 00:14:44,029 Now we go on to a game called 327 00:14:44,049 --> 00:14:45,240 Greatest Hits, my favorite game. 328 00:14:45,259 --> 00:14:48,129 This is a game for Colin, Ryan and Wayne 329 00:14:48,149 --> 00:14:50,070 'with the help of Laura Hall on the keyboards.' 330 00:14:50,090 --> 00:14:51,289 'Laura Hall.' 331 00:14:52,009 --> 00:14:54,190 'Uh, Colin and Ryan, you're, uh, TV voice-over artists' 332 00:14:54,210 --> 00:14:56,070 and you're pitching the latest compilation album 333 00:14:56,090 --> 00:14:58,279 and, Wayne, you're gonna sing, uh, snippets of the songs. 334 00:14:59,000 --> 00:15:00,250 What we need from the audience is a profession 335 00:15:00,269 --> 00:15:02,139 you wouldn't normally sing songs about. 336 00:15:02,159 --> 00:15:04,159 [indistinct yelling] 337 00:15:04,179 --> 00:15:06,190 'Bus driver?' 338 00:15:06,210 --> 00:15:10,110 Bus driver. That's a good one. 339 00:15:10,129 --> 00:15:13,000 So the name of your album is "Songs Of The Bus Driver." 340 00:15:15,220 --> 00:15:17,090 Hi, we interrupt the commercial 341 00:15:17,110 --> 00:15:19,269 to bring you another commercial. 342 00:15:19,289 --> 00:15:21,009 We've got an offer for you 343 00:15:21,029 --> 00:15:24,240 over 500 songs on 50 CDs. 344 00:15:24,259 --> 00:15:25,279 And what about? 345 00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:28,259 Why, our old friend, the bus driver. 346 00:15:28,279 --> 00:15:30,019 Throughout the ages 347 00:15:30,039 --> 00:15:32,210 well, at least the ages where we had buses 348 00:15:32,230 --> 00:15:34,139 the bus driver has been our friend 349 00:15:34,159 --> 00:15:36,059 and we've had songs that went along 350 00:15:36,080 --> 00:15:37,149 with our bus driver friend. 351 00:15:37,169 --> 00:15:39,200 Remember this 352 00:15:39,220 --> 00:15:42,029 Michael Jackson hit 353 00:15:42,049 --> 00:15:44,009 "You're Not On My Root?" 354 00:15:45,240 --> 00:15:47,200 That'd be route? Route. 355 00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:51,259 [instrumental music] 356 00:15:55,250 --> 00:15:57,009 ♪ Ah ah ♪ 357 00:15:57,029 --> 00:16:00,120 ♪ Ss uh-uh ♪ 358 00:16:00,139 --> 00:16:02,220 ♪ You want me to go north ♪ 359 00:16:02,240 --> 00:16:04,210 ♪ I'm goin' south ♪ 360 00:16:04,230 --> 00:16:06,190 ♪ You're not on my root ♪ 361 00:16:06,210 --> 00:16:09,080 ♪ I mean route Hoo ♪ 362 00:16:09,100 --> 00:16:13,080 ♪ Girl you're buggin' me you're makin' me scream ♪ 363 00:16:13,100 --> 00:16:17,200 ♪ Because you're not a bus driver's dream ah ♪ 364 00:16:17,220 --> 00:16:19,090 ♪ I'm drivin' the bus ah ♪ 365 00:16:19,110 --> 00:16:21,190 ♪ There are people in the back ♪ 366 00:16:21,210 --> 00:16:22,240 ♪ Because where you're goin' ♪ 367 00:16:22,259 --> 00:16:24,210 ♪ Is a common sense that you lack ♪ 368 00:16:24,230 --> 00:16:27,169 ♪ I'm not goin' your root-route hoo ♪ 369 00:16:27,190 --> 00:16:28,250 ♪ I'm not your root-route ♪ 370 00:16:28,269 --> 00:16:30,049 ♪ Oh ♪ 371 00:16:30,070 --> 00:16:32,090 ♪ Your root-route huh ♪ 372 00:16:32,110 --> 00:16:34,149 ♪ Your root-route uh ♪♪ 373 00:16:40,059 --> 00:16:42,049 Michael Jackson, a wonderful singer 374 00:16:42,070 --> 00:16:43,240 and a great head coach. 375 00:16:43,259 --> 00:16:45,220 You know, there's a lot of songs 376 00:16:45,240 --> 00:16:47,090 'that you won't hear in this country' 377 00:16:47,110 --> 00:16:49,220 'that we've taken from others.' 378 00:16:49,240 --> 00:16:52,129 How much would you pay for a 5-CD set like this? 379 00:16:52,149 --> 00:16:54,279 Or even a 50-CD set like this? 380 00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:57,169 Why, I'd pay up to $50,000. 381 00:16:59,179 --> 00:17:01,139 But I'm an idiot! 382 00:17:04,069 --> 00:17:06,170 And you're from Canada, so with the exchange.. 383 00:17:06,190 --> 00:17:08,150 I'm still an idiot. 384 00:17:10,220 --> 00:17:13,289 There are so many hits on this CD set 385 00:17:14,009 --> 00:17:16,130 that you can't listen to 'em all in one day 386 00:17:16,150 --> 00:17:17,240 but you can try. 387 00:17:17,259 --> 00:17:19,220 And you know, none is more popular 388 00:17:19,240 --> 00:17:22,079 than that number-one country-western hit 389 00:17:22,099 --> 00:17:24,109 simply titled, "Pfff!" 390 00:17:26,170 --> 00:17:29,130 [instrumental music] 391 00:17:30,190 --> 00:17:31,230 ♪ Pfff ♪ 392 00:17:34,170 --> 00:17:36,099 [blowing] 393 00:17:37,140 --> 00:17:38,130 [imitating bus door opening] 394 00:17:38,150 --> 00:17:41,119 [blowing] 395 00:17:41,140 --> 00:17:42,220 [imitating bus door opening] 396 00:17:42,240 --> 00:17:44,069 [imitating bus honking] 397 00:17:44,089 --> 00:17:45,079 ♪ Come on come on ♪♪ 398 00:17:45,099 --> 00:17:46,119 [imitating bus door opening] 399 00:17:46,140 --> 00:17:47,099 [blowing] 400 00:17:49,059 --> 00:17:50,200 Ting. Crink. 401 00:17:55,029 --> 00:17:56,099 Come on! 402 00:17:58,009 --> 00:18:00,269 [crowd cheering] 403 00:18:03,259 --> 00:18:05,109 You know, when driving on the bus 404 00:18:05,130 --> 00:18:07,250 or as our Canadian friends say, a boose.. 405 00:18:11,089 --> 00:18:12,130 As our regular viewers know-- 406 00:18:12,150 --> 00:18:15,019 - You've made me giggle. - I know. 407 00:18:15,039 --> 00:18:19,000 As our regular viewers know, I'm a pretty hip, groovy guy. 408 00:18:19,019 --> 00:18:22,220 - And I love the '80s funk. - Oh, who doesn't? 409 00:18:22,240 --> 00:18:24,029 Remember that great one? 410 00:18:24,049 --> 00:18:27,079 "I Got A Flat Tire." "I Got A Flat Tire." 411 00:18:27,099 --> 00:18:30,059 [instrumental music] 412 00:18:36,220 --> 00:18:39,289 ♪ Man I didn't think that I'd be alive ♪ 413 00:18:40,009 --> 00:18:43,230 ♪ Driving down the 405 ♪ 414 00:18:43,250 --> 00:18:47,019 ♪ All of a sudden just like that my bus went ♪ 415 00:18:47,039 --> 00:18:48,150 [imitating tires screeching] 416 00:18:48,170 --> 00:18:50,200 ♪ Damn I gots a flat ♪ 417 00:18:50,220 --> 00:18:52,140 ♪ Oh that's right ♪ 418 00:18:52,160 --> 00:18:54,210 ♪ Makes me want to retire ♪ 419 00:18:54,230 --> 00:18:57,140 ♪ Yeah baby I've got a flat tire ♪ 420 00:18:57,160 --> 00:19:00,059 ♪ I've got flat uh a flat uh ♪ 421 00:19:00,079 --> 00:19:02,279 ♪ You know I do I've got a flat ♪ 422 00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:05,000 ♪ Say what I've got a flat ♪ 423 00:19:05,019 --> 00:19:07,049 ♪ Oww ♪♪ 424 00:19:07,069 --> 00:19:10,029 [crowd cheering] 425 00:19:12,049 --> 00:19:14,079 - Yeah. - It was too good. 426 00:19:14,099 --> 00:19:15,250 (Drew) 'Man, oh, man.' 427 00:19:24,049 --> 00:19:26,089 Hey, don't go anywhere 'cause when we come back 428 00:19:26,109 --> 00:19:27,119 to "Whose Line Is It Anyway?" 429 00:19:27,140 --> 00:19:28,180 we're gonna find out who the winner is 430 00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:30,119 and we're gonna do some improv with them 431 00:19:30,140 --> 00:19:32,099 so stay right where you are. 432 00:19:37,160 --> 00:19:39,170 Hey, welcome back to "Whose Line Is It Anyway?" 433 00:19:39,190 --> 00:19:41,049 Tonight's winners are Ryan and Greg. 434 00:19:41,069 --> 00:19:43,160 Ryan and Greg are the winners. 435 00:19:43,180 --> 00:19:45,210 Thank you, Ryan and Greg. 436 00:19:45,230 --> 00:19:47,220 And they're gonna play a game with me called News Flash. 437 00:19:47,240 --> 00:19:50,000 What happens in News Flash is they're news people 438 00:19:50,019 --> 00:19:51,000 in a newsroom. 439 00:19:51,019 --> 00:19:52,170 I'm gonna be the guy that's in the field. 440 00:19:52,190 --> 00:19:55,109 I'm gonna stand right over here in front of this green screen 441 00:19:55,130 --> 00:19:56,160 and the trick of this game is 442 00:19:56,180 --> 00:19:58,049 I don't know what's on the green screen 443 00:19:58,069 --> 00:20:00,150 and, uh, only the people watching the monitor know. 444 00:20:00,170 --> 00:20:01,240 So I can't see the monitors anywhere 445 00:20:01,259 --> 00:20:03,069 and I have to try to guess 446 00:20:03,089 --> 00:20:05,089 what's on the green screen during the course of the game. 447 00:20:05,109 --> 00:20:07,079 So, uh, Ryan and Greg 448 00:20:07,099 --> 00:20:09,009 whenever you're ready, take it away. 449 00:20:09,029 --> 00:20:12,099 - I'm Thomas Guide. - And I'm Mark the page. 450 00:20:12,119 --> 00:20:14,029 And we've got Drew Carey out in the field. 451 00:20:14,049 --> 00:20:15,200 Drew, can you hear us, Drew? 452 00:20:15,220 --> 00:20:17,119 Uh, yeah, I can hear you fine. 453 00:20:17,140 --> 00:20:19,259 Uh, it's a little windy in here, a little noisy 454 00:20:19,279 --> 00:20:21,190 but I can hear you pretty good. 455 00:20:21,210 --> 00:20:23,190 (Greg) 'Really? How are you feeling right now?' 456 00:20:23,210 --> 00:20:25,160 'Has there been any change?' 457 00:20:25,180 --> 00:20:28,029 Uh, uh, there's been a quite a bit of excitement 458 00:20:28,049 --> 00:20:29,240 since this morning, the, uh.. 459 00:20:29,259 --> 00:20:31,029 Boy, people are drinking like crazy 460 00:20:31,049 --> 00:20:32,200 let me tell you that. 461 00:20:32,220 --> 00:20:35,250 (Ryan) 'Drew, Drew, are you in any sort of danger at the moment?' 462 00:20:35,269 --> 00:20:36,259 Uh, no, not that I know of. 463 00:20:36,279 --> 00:20:38,089 They seem to like me pretty much 464 00:20:38,109 --> 00:20:40,250 and, uh, they like my deodorant 465 00:20:40,269 --> 00:20:43,069 so they're pretty much leaving me alone, uh, whoever it is. 466 00:20:43,089 --> 00:20:46,150 (Greg) 'Can you characterize your feelings right now?' 467 00:20:46,170 --> 00:20:49,049 I feel very...alone. 468 00:20:50,119 --> 00:20:51,099 Uh.. 469 00:20:53,160 --> 00:20:55,240 Alone and lonely. 470 00:20:55,259 --> 00:20:59,160 Drew, you're the king in our book, you know that! 471 00:20:59,180 --> 00:21:02,119 (Greg) 'Do you have any solutions personally for this?' 472 00:21:02,140 --> 00:21:03,269 Oh, no, I leave that up to the experts. 473 00:21:03,289 --> 00:21:05,029 I don't try to tell people what to do. 474 00:21:05,049 --> 00:21:08,079 I'm just a lonely, country reporter. 475 00:21:08,099 --> 00:21:09,160 (Ryan) 'Well, Drew, you..' 476 00:21:09,180 --> 00:21:10,240 Drew, do you have any idea 477 00:21:10,259 --> 00:21:13,049 whether it's a red bum or a blue bum? 478 00:21:15,190 --> 00:21:18,089 Is there monkeys behind me? Chimpanzees? 479 00:21:18,109 --> 00:21:21,160 (Greg) 'Do you have any idea? Take a, take a big guess.' 480 00:21:21,180 --> 00:21:23,279 Alright, there's a giant King Kong or something, right? 481 00:21:24,000 --> 00:21:25,109 [crowd cheering] Oh! 482 00:21:25,130 --> 00:21:26,240 [buzzer buzzes] 483 00:21:26,259 --> 00:21:27,250 I can't believe I lucked out. 484 00:21:27,269 --> 00:21:29,240 Hey, thanks for watching 485 00:21:29,259 --> 00:21:31,079 "Whose Line Is It Anyway?" 486 00:21:31,099 --> 00:21:32,079 Goodnight! 487 00:21:35,009 --> 00:21:37,160 [theme music] 33278

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