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chean what is your problem that was a
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great house three bedrooms two baths and
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a large backyard van it was a colonial I
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want an English cottage I was very
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specific I want a tutor house with an
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English garden three Gables a pond with
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a water wheel and a turret where I can
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stand and brush my beautiful long blonde
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hair an English cottage in Houston why
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don't we just look for an egloo
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F the house that we provide shelter and
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love for our children the one that we
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raise them in it will be perfect and by
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perfect I mean a tutor house with an
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English garden three Gables and a turret
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now maybe just maybe you're not looking
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hard enough oh I oh what Cheyenne who am
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I hm who am I look at my business card I
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am van Montgomery I am great at real
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estate I will find a house for you and
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your spouse I would have written more
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but I ran out of
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space now if there's a house like that
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in Houston I would have already found it
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fan
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Cheyenne I have found you the perfect
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house is it an English cottage oh it's
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so English it hates
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France there's no way Mrs H I've looked
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at every house in the area in our price
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range well it's a little higher than
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your price range but it's been on the
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market for a long time and I think we
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can talk the owner down on the price
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I've got you appointment at 2:00 to look
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at it now Mrs H okay this sales pitch
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might work on less sophisticated buyers
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but I assure you we are not that easily
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C it has a
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turret 2 o00 you say Jolly
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[Applause]
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[Music]
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goods are planted in the past oh my life
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is changing fast who I am who I want to
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be a single mom who works too hard who
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loves her kids and never stops with
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hands and the Heart of
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a I'm a
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[Music]
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surv Hey Jake we're going to go check
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out a house for van and Cheyenne want to
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go with us I can't I'm going go carding
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with Jackie Kindle and Kindle's going to
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Super Glue Jack's butt to the go-kart
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seat car how about you uh-uh who do you
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think is giving the super glued
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Kindle guess what we're doing fixing to
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get Brock beat
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[Applause]
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up no we are going on a divorce date oh
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wow sounds romantic antic well if you
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guys like dating why are you getting a
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divorce oh no no no it's a date about
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the divorce we're going to start talking
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through some of the details I get that
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all right why the costumes re but I'm a
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celebrity so my man has to appear
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interesting in some
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way we got to dress up for my viewing
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public wow what's the chances you'll
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bump into all three of
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them Reba I don't expect you to
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understand but because I am an important
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figure we need to be aware of our
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appearance in public at all times our I
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thought you two weren't two anymore yes
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but that's off the Record yeah Barbara
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Jean doesn't want her public to know
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that we're separated because people want
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their weather from someone in a stable
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relationship we better get going Brock
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hey Brock wait a
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minute I know why L screw is doing this
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but why are you doing this ah what's the
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harm I got a full length mirror in my
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bathroom where you can see the
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harm okay look Barbara jeene always
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complained that I wasn't supportive of
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her career so I want her to know that I
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am well it's very Noble of you I don't
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mean to be mean but a that kind of like
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closing the Barn Door after the cows run
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away maybe but maybe I want the cow to
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know that I miss
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it well that is a really terrible
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metaphor when you're talking about your
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[Applause]
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[Music]
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wife Mom this is beautiful as you can
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see the house has beautiful hardwood
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floors laminate handcrafted veneer solid
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oak maybe maybe
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not the kitchen has brand new appliances
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and granite countertops upstairs has
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been converted to a game room game what
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a game room complete with a pool table
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air hockey table and a flat screen TV
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that the owner says she'll throw in at
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the same price
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oh I'm okay
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I'm okay but I can't say that for Mrs
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Pac-Man excuse me I have to uh speak
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with my wife for a moment please
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Cheyenne yeah I love this house I know
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me too van let's make an offer okay but
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wait she represents the seller okay so
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we have to play it cool okay we'll take
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it we'll pay anything she
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wants what are you doing that's not the
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way you negotiate now watch and learn
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yeah we might be interested but uh we
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got a lot of other options so we are no
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rush to buy this this I don't
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know well would you like for me to talk
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to the owner and see if she'll come down
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on the price whatever you want I could
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take it or leave it it's not really you
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know no
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oh there's the owner now I'm going to
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meet her and get this thing started take
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your time oh man I hope this works out
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could you imagine our own house I know
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and it's like it's destined to be ours I
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mean it looks like us the Landscaping
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looks like us that picture on the wall
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even looks like
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us it is us that's a picture of our
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senior class hey that's a picture of
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Bridget
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Bridget O'Hara what she doing on my
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mantle guys this is Bridget Bridget this
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is
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Chey
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Bridget you two know each other well of
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course Cheyenne van and I were all
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friends in high school well what a small
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world how come I've never met her well
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cuz why would I bring her
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around oh man look at you you are even
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bigger and stronger than you were in
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high school chean isn't it unfair guys
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just get better looking with age and we
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girls I mean look how I've fallen apart
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really I don't see anything Fallen but I
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do see
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Parts oh man stop it oh yeah Vance stop
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it so you guys are old friends that's so
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nice and usually old friends say nice
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things to each other especially when
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you're trying to buy a house from them
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right Cheyenne right you know Bridge you
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do look better than you did in high
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school you're not as
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pear-shaped well that must be because I
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now a fitness instructor yeah I
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specialize in der a I'm a derri
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aist oh fitness instructor huh what
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happened couldn't get into law school oh
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you know me Cheyenne I was always the
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pretty one and you were always the smart
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one I was not the smart one okay that's
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all very interesting but we should
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really start talking about the house now
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oh Cheyenne you know what I just thought
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of that's so funny remember when I asked
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van to the Sati Hawkins stance right
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before you
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did know Bridget I think that's water
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under the bridge yes yes it is bridge
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and you know why because I got the guy
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yeah we've been married for 5 years and
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I'm pregnant with our second child
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you're pregnant M oh the had explains
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it okay all right okay here uh the
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important thing is we're here to buy a
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house take a seat thank you and it I
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think it's about time for us to discuss
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the price so Bridget uh the house has
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been on the market for quite a long time
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now so we were thinking you might want
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to come down on the price just a little
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bit okay hang on a second Cheyenne do
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you really want this house yes Bridget I
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really do well that's good because
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you're not going to have it what why are
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you doing this because you made my life
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miserable in high school the things you
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wrote about me in the bathrooms
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Bridget's missing a digit what is that
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even
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mean I don't know but it it was pretty
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funny in high
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school you know what's funny now you're
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not going to get this house
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[Music]
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I just got off the phone with Bridget
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and she's at least willing to come over
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here and talk now if you want her to
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reconsider I suggest that you be nice to
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her oh please Cheyenne you've got to let
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this high school stuff go we're talking
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about your home here not who should have
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been homecoming queen me I was
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[Laughter]
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robed that must be Bridget our doorbells
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never sounded so
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hey Mrs a no offense but you kind
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of botch that back there so let me
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handle Bridget okay you talk like a
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babbling idiot when she's around how
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wasn't act I am completely in control no
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right
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hello you better handle
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this Bridget won't you come in thank you
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look I think the first thing we need to
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do is apologize for our Behavior over at
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the house right you first Mrs H I meant
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you right so uh
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Bridget uh being a professional real
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estate agent I know that emotions can
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run High when you're buying or selling a
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house so I just want to
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AP I want I want I
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want well I suppose we all got a little
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emo
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going through this divorce has forced me
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to take a hard look at myself and for
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the most part I really do like what I
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see
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and I will be happy to reconsider once
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Cheyenne
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apologizes what yeah she's sorry she's
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terribly sorry you know what why don't
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you two hug and make up
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I haven't heard the
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apology cheen the only other turret in
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town is at the miniature golf course
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keep
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going
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Bridget I said some pretty mean things
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to you in high school and in the
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yearbooks and the occasional bathroom um
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and for that I'm I'm truly truly sorry I
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hope you can forgive
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me I am truly truly sorry that I asked
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van to the dance although it is kind of
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a funny story what oh come on Van we
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could all use a little laugh why what
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what happened well I asked van because
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he asked me to he didn't want to go with
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you he couldn't stand you isn't that
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funny
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[Laughter]
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[Music]
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so yeah so so how do we start this I
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don't know I guess I guess the first
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thing is are are you sure that you're
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comfortable doing this without any
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lawyers I guess I mean Reba had a lawyer
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and you still screwed her in the
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divorce I did not you frankly frankly
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the lawyers were a big part part of the
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problem I mean you know they they make
274
00:13:31,240 --> 00:13:34,720
their money when they get both parties
275
00:13:32,720 --> 00:13:37,240
into some big fight well I don't want
276
00:13:34,720 --> 00:13:39,399
that no me neither so I guess we just
277
00:13:37,240 --> 00:13:42,920
have to be honest with each other I
278
00:13:39,399 --> 00:13:45,480
agree okay all right well I'll go first
279
00:13:42,920 --> 00:13:49,279
then okay all
280
00:13:45,480 --> 00:13:52,560
right um I am being completely honest
281
00:13:49,279 --> 00:13:54,399
when I say that I feel ridiculous
282
00:13:52,560 --> 00:13:55,399
wearing this tie so if it's okay with
283
00:13:54,399 --> 00:13:57,320
you I'm just going to I'm going to take
284
00:13:55,399 --> 00:13:59,800
it off oh no no no no no no leave the
285
00:13:57,320 --> 00:14:02,560
tie on you look great
286
00:13:59,800 --> 00:14:03,680
well thank you honey but seriously Barb
287
00:14:02,560 --> 00:14:06,240
genene don't you think I'm a bit
288
00:14:03,680 --> 00:14:11,040
overdressed for a restaurant that
289
00:14:06,240 --> 00:14:14,199
serves burn your butt chili I
290
00:14:11,040 --> 00:14:16,600
mean well I think you're not overdressed
291
00:14:14,199 --> 00:14:18,680
to be seen in public as stormy clear
292
00:14:16,600 --> 00:14:21,839
weather's
293
00:14:18,680 --> 00:14:24,959
husband okay look
294
00:14:21,839 --> 00:14:27,959
um being completely honest here just two
295
00:14:24,959 --> 00:14:31,560
two tiny tiny little things one you're
296
00:14:27,959 --> 00:14:33,440
not stormy clear weather and two we are
297
00:14:31,560 --> 00:14:36,279
here because you don't want me to be
298
00:14:33,440 --> 00:14:40,160
your husband anymore okay well here are
299
00:14:36,279 --> 00:14:45,720
two tiny little honest things from me
300
00:14:40,160 --> 00:14:49,240
one I am stormy clear weather and two
301
00:14:45,720 --> 00:14:54,399
for once can we just do what I want and
302
00:14:49,240 --> 00:14:56,800
not what you want and just leave the tie
303
00:14:54,399 --> 00:15:01,560
on sorry
304
00:14:56,800 --> 00:15:05,120
stormy the tie is coming off okay I'm
305
00:15:01,560 --> 00:15:07,560
warning you if you take that tie off you
306
00:15:05,120 --> 00:15:09,720
are going to be in big
307
00:15:07,560 --> 00:15:13,399
trouble yeah big
308
00:15:09,720 --> 00:15:19,120
trouble do not test me here it goes do
309
00:15:13,399 --> 00:15:22,839
not undo that time do not undo it don't
310
00:15:19,120 --> 00:15:30,959
Undo It Don't Undo
311
00:15:22,839 --> 00:15:30,959
It Noto that time I'm so bar G don't d
312
00:15:31,959 --> 00:15:36,120
my oh God I'm so turned
313
00:15:36,250 --> 00:15:45,960
[Applause]
314
00:15:46,639 --> 00:15:51,560
up what do you mean you couldn't stand
315
00:15:49,360 --> 00:15:53,399
me I didn't say that she did well is it
316
00:15:51,560 --> 00:15:56,000
true yes you were so smart I was
317
00:15:53,399 --> 00:15:58,519
intimidated I was not
318
00:15:56,000 --> 00:15:59,959
smart okay I believe we're losing sight
319
00:15:58,519 --> 00:16:01,480
of what to today's meeting is all I mean
320
00:15:59,959 --> 00:16:02,639
what did you do van did you just you
321
00:16:01,480 --> 00:16:04,600
know go up to her and say I hate
322
00:16:02,639 --> 00:16:08,800
Cheyenne ask me to the dance of course
323
00:16:04,600 --> 00:16:13,319
not no he wrote me a poem a poem a
324
00:16:08,800 --> 00:16:15,199
poem it was a note luckily it rhymed oh
325
00:16:13,319 --> 00:16:17,319
I think I'd like to hear that poem but
326
00:16:15,199 --> 00:16:20,160
nobody remembers that please take me to
327
00:16:17,319 --> 00:16:23,279
the dance I promise to wear long pants
328
00:16:20,160 --> 00:16:26,160
I'll do anything I can not to go with
329
00:16:23,279 --> 00:16:28,040
shyan you jerk okay that's it you know
330
00:16:26,160 --> 00:16:29,480
what Bridget we don't want your house
331
00:16:28,040 --> 00:16:31,160
what that's right
332
00:16:29,480 --> 00:16:35,240
no house is worth standing here
333
00:16:31,160 --> 00:16:35,240
listening to some derer torture my
334
00:16:35,920 --> 00:16:40,000
daughter you are making a big mistake
335
00:16:38,560 --> 00:16:43,199
you better leave quick or I'm going to
336
00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:43,199
get a stick well
337
00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:50,399
fine have you gone
338
00:16:48,319 --> 00:16:51,480
mad I mean if you were going to kick her
339
00:16:50,399 --> 00:16:53,880
out you could have at least done it
340
00:16:51,480 --> 00:16:53,880
before I
341
00:16:57,240 --> 00:17:03,519
apologized yes okay maybe things just
342
00:17:00,839 --> 00:17:06,160
got a little out of control okay oh that
343
00:17:03,519 --> 00:17:07,880
sounds so close to an apology but not
344
00:17:06,160 --> 00:17:10,199
quite there yet bye-bye okay wait wait
345
00:17:07,880 --> 00:17:12,480
wait wait wait
346
00:17:10,199 --> 00:17:15,360
wait I'm
347
00:17:12,480 --> 00:17:17,240
sorry I was just trying to get back at
348
00:17:15,360 --> 00:17:19,679
you
349
00:17:17,240 --> 00:17:22,640
Cheyenne look I really need to sell this
350
00:17:19,679 --> 00:17:26,439
house do you still want to buy it
351
00:17:22,640 --> 00:17:28,000
maybe for 20 off the list price what in
352
00:17:26,439 --> 00:17:30,840
this market that's all it's worth take
353
00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:30,840
it or leave it
354
00:17:31,240 --> 00:17:35,960
okay
355
00:17:32,960 --> 00:17:39,120
deal you know what shahan you should go
356
00:17:35,960 --> 00:17:41,440
hug Bridget you know we should all go
357
00:17:39,120 --> 00:17:43,120
hug I'll come over later this afternoon
358
00:17:41,440 --> 00:17:47,039
we can hammer out the deal great thank
359
00:17:43,120 --> 00:17:51,080
you thank you bye-bye
360
00:17:47,039 --> 00:17:53,480
bye this H underneath that pile of red
361
00:17:51,080 --> 00:17:54,880
hair and emotional rage is a genius how
362
00:17:53,480 --> 00:17:56,360
did you know she was going to come back
363
00:17:54,880 --> 00:17:59,840
well then you just have to learn how to
364
00:17:56,360 --> 00:18:01,260
read people like you right now
365
00:17:59,840 --> 00:18:04,410
I know you're
366
00:18:01,260 --> 00:18:04,410
[Music]
367
00:18:04,600 --> 00:18:07,960
hungry I am
368
00:18:08,039 --> 00:18:15,280
hungry you're you're a
369
00:18:12,000 --> 00:18:19,679
genius so
370
00:18:15,280 --> 00:18:21,400
hungry very impressive Mom thanks you
371
00:18:19,679 --> 00:18:24,200
had no idea she was going to Cave did
372
00:18:21,400 --> 00:18:27,360
you no I just lost my temper and it all
373
00:18:24,200 --> 00:18:29,880
fell into place oh I'm so glad you did
374
00:18:27,360 --> 00:18:33,160
oh oh honey I just wish we could go back
375
00:18:29,880 --> 00:18:47,039
and get you that homecoming queen I was
376
00:18:33,160 --> 00:18:49,240
[Music]
377
00:18:47,039 --> 00:18:53,919
BR
378
00:18:49,240 --> 00:18:55,840
wow that was different I know that was
379
00:18:53,919 --> 00:18:58,600
amazing that was even better than the
380
00:18:55,840 --> 00:18:59,520
parking lot yeah well it's getting kind
381
00:18:58,600 --> 00:19:03,000
of
382
00:18:59,520 --> 00:19:05,480
late or should I say early we better get
383
00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:09,280
some shut ey you're right good night
384
00:19:05,480 --> 00:19:10,600
honey goodbye what well you didn't think
385
00:19:09,280 --> 00:19:13,039
you were going to stay the night did you
386
00:19:10,600 --> 00:19:15,400
Brock were getting divorced what kind of
387
00:19:13,039 --> 00:19:18,000
girl do you think I am so what you're
388
00:19:15,400 --> 00:19:20,720
saying I just had a one night stand with
389
00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:23,679
my wife well not necessarily I was
390
00:19:20,720 --> 00:19:26,559
thinking of having you over tomorrow
391
00:19:23,679 --> 00:19:30,200
night so I don't have to and cuddle
392
00:19:26,559 --> 00:19:31,799
winner winner chicken dinner
393
00:19:30,200 --> 00:19:36,480
at least I can take off the stupid tie
394
00:19:31,799 --> 00:19:38,400
now do not undo the tie oh I'm undoing
395
00:19:36,480 --> 00:19:42,360
the tie oh no you don't oh yes I do oh
396
00:19:38,400 --> 00:19:44,799
no you don't do not look it's coming off
397
00:19:42,360 --> 00:19:48,760
it's coming off it's coming off I'm not
398
00:19:44,799 --> 00:19:48,760
coming back on the time
399
00:19:51,510 --> 00:19:53,700
[Music]
27139
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