All language subtitles for KC S2 E1

Okay, Dad, move to your right.

Ernie, to your left. Faster!

Faster. You gotta move faster.

Mom, you gotta move
your butt. Move it.

Move it.

KC, stop barking out orders
like we're on a mission.

This is a dance revolution,
not an actual revolution.

Yeah, and you tell me to
move my butt one more time,

you won't be able
to sit on yours.

I'm sorry, okay. I don't
know what's worse,

losing Judy, not being
able to be a spy anymore,

or watching Ernie
drop it like it's hot.

And by the way, it's not.

Well, I wouldn't really
have time to dance

if you hadn't gotten us
kicked out of the Organization.

I know, I know.

Okay, it's all my fault.

Why don't we just blame
the whole thing on KC?

That's what we're doing.

I feel terrible,

and I'm trying everything I can

to get us back
in, and I promise,

- I'm never gonna give up.
- That's my girl.

Now do me a favor. Give up!

It's been over a month.

The Organization isn't
returning your calls.

They're not answering emails.

Based on my
experience, it sounds like

they just wanna be friends,

but they don't.

Look, honey,

Judy's been reassigned,
and we're not spies anymore.

I know it's tough,

but it's time that we
moved on with our lives.

Your mother's right.

Our days of excitement
and danger are over.

You did it, Jackal.

The Coopers might
have put you away,

but they couldn't
keep you locked up.

I know.

I'm the one who
just spent ten months

digging my way out.

No prison can hold the Jackal.

I'm comin' for you, Coopers.

♪ Oh, when danger
comes for you ♪

♪ You know I'll
stand beside you ♪

♪ 'Cause ain't nobody
keep things hustle cool ♪

♪ I'll always find a way,
a way out of the fire ♪

♪ Don't tell nobody,
tell nobody ♪

♪ I'm not perfect ♪

♪ So many things
I wanna tell you ♪

♪ But I, I, I, I keep
it undercover ♪

♪ Livin' my life,
no way to learn ♪

♪ Doin' my thing,
gonna make it work ♪

♪ Know I'm the realest,
baby, I'm fearless ♪

♪ But I always got your back ♪

♪ Nobody can do it like I can ♪

♪ I gotta find out who I am ♪

♪ Ain't got to worry about me ♪

♪ It's all part of the plan ♪

♪ I keep it undercover ♪

♪ I keep it undercover, cover ♪

Ernie, what are you wearing?

Now that I'm no longer a spy,

I've decided to be an inventor.

Really? 'Cause it looks
like you've decided

never to know the
touch of a woman.

You happen to be looking
at a million-dollar idea.

The jack-pack.

One part jacket,
one part backpack.

And two parts terrible.

Where exactly are
you gonna sell it at?

Bad Ideas R Us?

Hi, KC. How's it going?

Oh, going great. I feel amazing.

In fact, I'm not thinking
about the Organization at all.

Ernie's moving on
with his life, why can't I?

Well, in order to
move on with your life,

you had to have had
one in the first place.

What are you talking about?

For your information, I
was leading a double life.

That's true.

Unfortunately, one was secret,

and the other one was boring.

KC, you were so busy
trying to keep a low profile,

people don't even know
you go to this school.

That is all types of ridiculous.

Hey, what's crackin', Marisa?

What's up, new girl?

Uh, Darien, it's KC.

You've known me
since second grade.

KC? I thought you died.

Wait, if that wasn't you,

then whose funeral did I go to?

What are you talking about?

I sit next to you every
day in business class.

Business class?
I don't think so.

I've only flown coach.

Anyways, gotta
get back to class.

See you at the
game, right, Marisa?

Oh, and glad you're
not dead, Katie.

It's KC, and you know me!

Okay, you're right.

Um, excuse me?

I said you were right.

Oh, I know, it just
happens so rarely,

I wanted to hear it again.

I cannot believe
that people literally

do not know who I am.

I might as well be dead.

If I'm not gonna
be a spy anymore,

I can at least be someone
that people notice.

Know what?

It's time for a new me.

Finally. Santa got my letters.

Okay, new KC.

Let's go hang out with
bad boys at the mall.

I think Juvie Joey
will really like you.

Marisa, I was thinking
about getting involved

with something at school,

so people know that I exist.

Something like, uh...
like the math team.

Sounds like the new you
is a lot like the old you.

♪ Boring! ♪

Hey!

How many times
do I have to tell you,

use yesterday's teabag.

Yesterday's teabag!

I've been using
yesterday's teabag

for five yesterdays.

At this point, I'm just drinking
hot water with a hint of string.

Well, I'm sorry, but
we need to cut back.

Plus, tea is for fancy
people with jobs

who can afford to heat water.

Okay, Craig, look, I
know it's a tough time.

Everything has
changed, and it's scary.

Maybe we just
need a distraction.

Something that'll keep us
busy but won't cost a cent.

I know. Let's have another baby.

That makes no sense,
and costs a lot of cents.

- Oh, come on. We're good at babies.
- Absolutely not.

Please. Just one itty-bitty
teeny-tiny little baby.

Get away from me, crazy lady.

You know what? You're right.

I am acting crazy.

I think it's because I
just miss Judy so much.

It's okay, honey.

Judy is with a new family now,

and I'm sure they love
her just as much as we do.

Morning, Agent
Graham, Agent Penelope.

Soft-boiled eggs again?

Deja pew!

Can't you eat a scrambled
egg up in this joint?

What do you care?

You don't even eat.

You're just a... machine.

Interesting.

You're the person,

yet I'm the one
with the personality.

Anywho... when I
lived with the Coopers,

we used to talk at breakfast

about our plans for the day.

Yes, you've mentioned that

for the past 37 days in a row.

Actually, Judy, we do have

a very important
assignment for you.

Now we're talkin'.
What do you got?

We want you to go into your box,

and don't come
out until we call you.

But that's the 37th time
that I've had that mission.

Maybe this time,
you'll get it right.

FYI, I don't like
you guys either.

Well, I tried to
join the math team

but then they said I
wasn't part of their equation,

and then laughed hysterically.

That is kind of funny.

Math team, equation.

They are mean.

I also tried out
for the glee club,

but they turned me
down because apparently,

you have to be able
to "carry a tune."

At least they didn't laugh.

Oh, no, they laughed,
in three-part harmony.

I tried to join in, but
then again, they're right.

I can't carry a tune.

I also tried out for
the debate team,

and the yearbook
committee, but it's all taken

because it's the
middle of the year.

How am I supposed to
make a name for myself now?

Don't worry. I have a
solution to your problems.

Soon, everyone will be
talking about KC Cooper.

Ta-da!

And what exactly does this hand
towel have to do with anything?

It's a dress.

Marisa, I am not wearing that.

I show less skin to
my dermatologist.

But there is a dance coming up...

Oh, yes, right, right.
The dance. Perfect.

If you want everyone
to know who you are,

why don't you just go with
a guy that everyone knows?

Yeah, for sure, yeah.

And maybe if that works out,

he could offer my dad
two cows and a donkey

for my hand in marriage.

Marisa, I don't need a guy
to help me stand out, okay?

I wanna be able to
stand out on my own.

Well, the way you dance,
you'll definitely stand out.

Okay, I get it. I'm
not a great dancer.

But there is still a way for
me to be the center of attention

at the dance.

Put the postage stamp away.

What I'm saying is, I am
going to deejay the dance.

But they already have a deejay.

DJ Mike. You must know
who he is. Everybody does.

Oh, okay.

Now I see why you
wanna be the deejay.

How's your day going, guv'nors?

That information is classified.

I don't know why the pilgrims
wanted to get away from y'all.

Ooh, the Real
House-boos marathon.

Who's your favorite
house-boo... boo?

I've heard enough. Turn it off.

Fine.

I wasn't talking to you.

Please, turn it off.

With pleasure.

By the by, Penners,

what, pray tell, is a house-boo?

I'd rather die not knowing.

Oh, hey, Darien, wait up.

How you doin', Katie?

Uh, actually, it's...
Katie's doin' fine.

Thanks for asking.

I actually have
to ask you a favor.

I know that you're the head
of the dance committee,

and I really wanna deejay
at tomorrow's dance.

Sorry, wish I could help,
but DJ Mike's already doing it.

See ya later, Katie.

Okay, you don't know me.

And I mean literally,
because my name is KC.

But I don't really take
no for an answer, so...

How about you just let
me deejay at the dance,

and let's not make this weird.

Uh, it's already gotten weird.

What are you doing in here?

Uh, blushing.

What's your name?

Great. Another
person at the school

who doesn't know me.

Yeah, that's right.
What's up, everybody?

Who's ready to get their
dance on with DJ KC?

D-D-D-D-DJ KC.

Um, KC, what
happened to DJ Mike?

He may or may not have thought
that the dance was cancelled.

Why do I think that
D-D-D-DJ KC... wikka wikka...

told him that?

Yeah, well, Marisa, at least now,
people are gonna know who I am.

All right, yeah!

It's DJ KC on the ones and twos.

That's DJ K to the C.

That's KC.

Cooper.

That's K to the C
to the C to the O

to the O to the P...

A little deejay tip.

You might wanna let the
music play long enough

for people to actually dance.

True dat, true dat.

You know what, I'm gonna
just let this playlist rock

for a little bit.

Hey, hey.

That's right. You know.

DJ KC keepin' it real.

Y'all feelin' that?

You feelin' that?
You feelin' that?

Yeah, that's a beat
dropped on you

by DJ KC. Go!

Yeah, DJ KC's all
about those BPM's.

That's beats per minute,

according to
Wiki-wiki-Wikipedia.

All right, everybody.

Let's make some noise!

Okay, when I say
DJ, y'all say KC.

DJ.

Close. Very close.

One more time.

When I say DJ, you say KC. DJ!

You stink.

Not quite.

All right.

When I say DJ, you say KC. DJ!

I liked you better
when you were dead.

Okay!

Okay.

Now we're gettin' it,
right? One more time.

When I say DJ, you say KC. DJ!

- Get her outta here.
- DJ KC out!

Should've worn the dress.

Agent Graham, Agent Penelope,

you have to see this.

Judy, what did we tell you?

We don't watch
television in this house.

Then why do you have one?

Good point.

Put it in the rubbish, Graham,
and why don't you take

you know what with it?

Why don't you take it down
a notch, Snooty Blume?

I just saw breaking news

that the Jackal
escaped from prison,

and is heading towards D.C.

And we care why?

The Coopers are the
ones who put him away.

I've been programmed
not to contact them,

but someone has to warn them.

Why didn't someone warn us

that she won't shut
up about the Coopers?

They are no longer your concern.

Graham, reset her.

Don't even try it.

I can take you down
with two thumbs.

And I can take
you down with one.

I win!

Hey, did you guys notice
the car in front of our house?

There's a couple of
guys just sitting out there.

Yeah, it's probably some
fans of D-D-D-DJ KC!

D-d-d-doubtful.

They look really shady.

They could be enemy agents.

Bro, we're not spies anymore,

so it's time to build a bridge

and get over it.

Your sister's right.

You need to stop thinking
everything's suspicious.

You also have to stop looking
out the window with binoculars.

You gonna get arrested.

Look, bro...

I understand, okay.

It took me a while to transition

from being a teenage spy to a regular
high school girl/superstar deejay.

Who are you kidding?
You were a disaster.

A disaster.

People loved me. You heard
them screaming my name.

Oh, I didn't know your
name was "Boo, you stink."

Dad!

Would you two
please stop arguing?

Ow!

What the...

Look, guys, my deejay
career has just begun.

I'm still waiting to hear
back about that bat mitz...

Yeah, that's
right. Still got it.

Oh, no.

- Everybody okay?
- Yeah.

I'm a little groggy,
but I'm good.

Ernie?

Ten more minutes, Mom.

I wore my clothes
to bed last night

so I could sleep in.

It's pajamas.

It's a backpack.

It's a pajampack.

How long have I been talking?

Fourteen years.

Fourteen long years.

I wish I knew who
was behind this.

Anyone got any ideas?

The last thing I
remember is passing out

and waking up
in this white room.

We're in heaven?!

Yes, Ernie,

because being stuck in a
room with you for all eternity

is my idea of heaven.

Hello, Coopers. Follow me.

Agent Johnson is God?!

We're not in heaven.

Then that means we're...

We're not dead.

This better work, Graham.

I'm sick and tired of
hearing about the Coopers.

Don't worry, my love.

This robot reboot
should do the trick.

Greetings and
salutations. I'm Judy.

How may I assist you?

Capital job, Graham.

Welcome to our
home, little robot.

R2-D2 is a robot, honey.

I'm a JUDY.

Junior undercover digital youth.

And do yourself a favor.

Don't get all up
in my grill again.

Now, have either of you
contacted the Coopers

about the Jackal?

Or a decorator
about this apartment?

Forgive the dramatics,
but I thought it was time

for us to talk.

Oh, so you decided
to shoot us with darts.

How about the next time,
you just shoot us an email?

We had a training
session scheduled,

so two birds, one stone.

By the way,

those darts are in clinic trial,

so if you experience
any bowel irritation

or hair loss, let us know.

Okay, start talking,
Agent Johnson.

What's going on?

The Jackal has
escaped from prison.

The Jackal.

This is not good.

Not good? It's awful.

Catching the Jackal was one
of the most dangerous missions

we've ever had. We're
lucky we survived.

That man is a lunatic.

I heard his request
for his final meal

was his prison guard Ted.

I knew he'd escape.

You should've put him in something
that was impossible to get out of,

like a group text.

So is that why
you brought us in,

to keep us safe?

If by safe, you
mean use you as bait,

then yes.

The Jackal wants
to get to your family.

The plan is, use all of you
to lure him into the open,

and that's where
we'll recapture him.

Are you crazy?

That's a suicide mission.

We realize that, so in return,

we're willing to let the family
back in to the Organization.

You know, assuming you survive.

- We'll do it.
- Absolutely not.

I will not allow my
family to be a part of this.

So you're gonna do it alone?

Craig, you are my hero.

That's my dad.

Craig, I have called
you a mediocre spy

many times behind your back,

and a few times to your face.

But this is a new you.
Color me impressed.

- Hold up. This is not right.
- Thank you, Ernie.

It's not right unless
we get Judy back.

Excuse me?

You know what? He's right.

If my dad is going
to single-handedly

risk his life against
this bloodthirsty maniac,

- we want Judy.
- You got her.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.
She's been reassigned.

This sounds like it
could be a deal breaker.

And even if it's not, are
we sure we wanna be

back in the Organization?

I thought we were all
moving on with our lives.

KC, what about your
burgeoning deejay career?

What deejay career?

I was awful.

Not even my Ypod would
let me pick the songs.

Okay, well, Kira.

What about you?

It's not too late to
have another baby.

Oh, please.

That was the dumbest
idea anyone has ever had.

Aside from the jackpack.

That's not true. It
could still take off.

It's a jacket, it's a backpack.

It's a lawsuit
waiting to happen.

Choked me out three times today.

It sounds safer than
going up against the Jackal.

What if I say no?

Then you're not back in.

And the Jackal won't stop
till he gets to your family.

We're talking about a guy who
sporked his way out of prison.

Dad, face it. Without the
Organization's protection,

we are sporked.

Fine. I'll do it.

Yes! Yes, the team is
finally back together again.

You know what? Judy is
gonna be so excited to see us.

This should do it.

I've wiped her
memory board clean.

There should be no
trace of her former self.

Hello. My name is 30287459-YLT.

How may I be of service to you?

Splendid.

But from now on,
your new name is Sally.

My new name is Sally.

How may I be of service to you?

Aren't you wondering
how the Coopers are?

The Coopers?

I'm not sure who
the Coopers are.

Oh. According to the
Organization data files,

the Coopers are a
disgraced former spy family

that are no longer
of any interest to us.

Rob, your name's on TV.