Original subtitles

it's official Brock has lost his mind no

I think it was official when Brock left

me for

you why what's the matter what's up with

Dad no way Brock got a motorcycle that's

the funniest thing ever oh no not even

close just wait

[Laughter]

[Applause]

oh guess what I just wrote up on a gay

pride

float a Harley come on Barbara Jean wait

till you feel the wind in your face as

we cruise down the open road out behind

the

Walmart great at least today he's

wearing jeans underneath his chaps

hey

[Laughter]

everybody what are you doing you

weirdo are you happy now van thinks

you're a

weirdo hey how was your seminar oh it

was excellent and the hotel was topnotch

it even had a coffee maker in the

bathroom I ate in there every day a oh

Elizabeth missed you so much I'm going

to go upstairs and tell her you're here

oh Mrs H you should have gone to the

seminar with me this guy was like the

Donald Trump of real

estate I have so much to tell you I got

something to tell you too yesterday

morning there was a message on the

office voicemail from Steve Norris

Norris realy Steve Norris they like the

biggest for him in the city what do he

want oh nothing much just a meeting you

know what I think this means van he

wants us to join

no way we can't just leave our company

why not Realtors move to different

agencies all the time well that may be

so but I'm not that kind of person I'm a

loyal guy Mrs H ever since I was 6 years

old I have never brushed my teeth with

anything other than

Aquafresh man be realistic I mean if our

company could make more money by getting

someone to replace us they'd do it in a

skinny minute it's just business just

business well sorry Mrs H if you take

loyalty and ethics out of business you

know what you have television

[Music]

network pled in the past oh my life is

changing fast who I am is who I want to

be single mom who works too hard who

loves her kids who never stops with

gentle hands and the Heart of the

fire I'm a surviv

[Music]

ever what's up James Dean

hey you all right never

better are you sure you're all right

yeah yeah yeah I'm fine look check it

out it's an electrical stimulation belt

it's like doing 2,000 sit-ups in an hour

I'm going to get my six-pack abs back

remember them no but I remember your man

[Laughter]

[Applause]

girdle listen Brock I I need to talk to

you about something this um phase you're

going through with uh buying the

motorcycle and wearing the leather

outfit and electrocuting your belly

fat I mean it's it's kind of weird

funny but kind of

weird what's going on nothing

Rock All Right Rea I I'll tell you

Barbara Jean looks the best I've ever

seen her and and I want to do the same

for her okay I may choke on these words

but here they come Brock you're a

good-look man a good-looking man of 50

why do you have to be more than that

Reba you don't have to tell me I'm

good-look

I know that I'm not an

idiot but don't you see that's actually

the

problem how

so well I've always been the best

looking one in all of my

relationships you do remember that we

were once in a relationship don't

you what's your

point well my point is

[Applause]

switching firms wouldn't be loyal who

cares van Norris realy could be a huge

opportunity for you guys you know I can

never figure you out you're the one

person I expect to agree with me ever

since you got sober you're always

whining about doing the right thing that

was a phase okay now I'm comfortable

with my sobriety and I'm going back to

thinking what's best for me I mean us

really you mean you're going back to

that vain shallow chick I fell in love

with welcome back

honey look I really think that you

should do this look there's more to this

than just loyalty our company doesn't

see me as your mom's assistant they see

me as her partner they know how good I

am well so with these other guys no

Steve Norris doesn't know me from

Eve he thinks I'm the assistant maybe he

thinks that now me who cares man after

hearing you talk at the meeting he's

going to know how great you are hearing

me talk MH I don't see that happening

Cheyenne your mom can be a

little okay set the meeting but tell Mom

it's later than it really is get a

little alone time with them yeah by the

time she shows up he's already going to

be impressed with you I love that idea I

set a lunch meeting at my seminar they

were teaching us how to impress people

with lunch meetings you tip big and

order things that aren't on the menu I

could order

like yak

heyy Mrs H I re thought what you said

and I'm in I'm going to set the meeting

with Norris oh yes now remember van let

me do most of the talking okay oh you

know me I'm not one to

[Music]

Yak thank you this is for

you and this is for the valet and this

this is for you giving that one to the

Valley Van Montgomery Steve Norris I

like your style tips are like peanut

butter you got to spread it

around can I bring you something to

drink besides water first of all thank

you for the

water and that's for the guy who made

the

ice something to drink let's see do you

have pomegranate juice no I'm afraid not

we have orange tomato Apple grapefruit

and cranberry M do you have Tangerine

juice no sorry

watermelon no raisin Plum garbanzo

bean I've never even heard of that's

right I'll just stick with the water no

hard feelings

huh I like a man who doesn't settle for

something he doesn't want you should see

me ordering

cheese so Steve Norris graduated

MacArthur High School class of 1980

married 22 years to the former Anne

Peterson two children a boy Eric Stand

Out wide receiver SMU and a daughter

Tara just graduated from buck nail

University with a degree in chemistry I

Googled

you that's very impressive but that's

not me

hey I wish it was me my wife left me and

my son flunked out of Beauty

School stupid

Google great now you probably think I'm

an idiot why because you tried something

that's what's impressive besides you

don't need to know who I am I know who

you are yeah right I do you are one of

the hottest young real estate agents in

town I watched the MLS I see see how you

move properties with innovative ideas

like that place on Garfield is set for

eight months till you got the listing

you sold it in two days h a cite did the

show at

midnight I know I was there I still have

the balloon animal oh yeah yeah it's a

wiener

dog so it makes me wonder what you could

do with a larger inventory like say ours

oh man I watch the MLS too you guys have

the best listings in town thanks you

know van I'm beginning to think that

this is one of those meant to be

situations should we order

cheese oh hey there's Reba let's just

keep that Google screw up between us

okay why is Reba here huh van I'm not

interested in Reba I want you yeah but

Reba and I are Partners that's the

offer thank oh hi there Reba heart hi so

now that we're all here let's get this

meeting started actually I don't think

there's anything for us to talk about

yes there is no there

isn't comes down to loyalty Mr Norris

and thank you for your

[Music]

time okay he's not picking up his

messages and he wouldn't talk to me at

the valet stand how am I going to kill

him if I can't get in in touch with him

mom you have got to calm down I told him

let me do the talking but what does he

do he sneaks off to the meeting early

and then turns down the biggest break

we've ever been

offered finally all right you listen to

me Fathead you get your Lon scheming

pigling butt back here to this house

right oh Mr

Norris no no I thought it was my

Minister uh-huh

no he he didn't tell me

that yes I am very lucky to have such a

loyal partner yeah okay

bye they didn't want me they only want

van

really I mean what's up with

that I'm going to kill him why Mom he

turned them down that's why I'm going to

kill him this isn't opportunity he

cannot pass up he's got to take that job

it's not going to happen mom I mean van

has got a lot of screwy things about him

but they're mostly good screwy things

like

loyalty but this is big Cheyenne big for

him and big for your family doesn't

matter mom B is not going to take that

job without you I was hoping it wouldn't

come down to this Cheyenne I'm going to

have to break up with your husband

Ma you got to do what you got to

do h Hello Gucci

shoot no no no don't give me that crap

Dom the deal was the band gets the door

you get the bar so now cuz we're packing

people in your Club you want to get a

piece of the door no way that is a deal

breaker my friend we will walk away I

where yeah it break my heart

too what are you

crying I thought you were a Hell's

Angel sorry I had to take that what were

you

saying I was just asking if you wanted

to have a pajama party tonight and watch

The Little Mermaid with

me cool

so Napoleon did you vote for

Pedro oh the perm yeah I thought I'd try

something different mission accomplished

Sideshow

Bob so listen I was wondering if maybe

you'd like to go to dinner good God man

what have you done what's the big deal

so I tried something different different

why don't you try something really

different and be the same person two

days in a

row you are driving me crazy you're

driving me crazy well what is that

supposed to mean yeah well what about

you you're Reinventing yourself every

day well that's different I'm

young the true no you stop it you stop

it you know what I meant oh you better

believe I do is that what this is all

about Barbara jeene are you getting

ready to leave me for someone younger oh

yeah well you should talk what you

dumped my best friend Reba for a younger

woman yeah you I was a

child why now Brock why are you suddenly

acting like an

idiot

because because you're just so

beautiful it's not so bad

listen honey I'm I'm not planning

anything what I'm doing I'm doing for me

okay because it makes me

happy okay then okay guess I'll go wash

this out I don't think so why not what

do you think perm stands for I don't

know permanent

oh

God man I'm going to need a hat

[Music]

[Laughter]

Hey where's your mom I don't know all

right thanks for your

help what's this for stop asking

questions

go hello van

hey people know I'm here Mrs H my car is

parked right out front so don't think

you can kill me and Roll My Dead Body up

in a rug cuz we don't have a rug

[Laughter]

relax fam we need to

talk first of all you know I care about

you right oh of course that's why I'm

holding a garbage can

lid and wearing a

cup Ben you're a great

guy I just think it's time for a

change wait a minute are you breaking up

with

me we're in different places we want

different things you are breaking up

with me no one's ever broken up with me

before man we used to laugh a lot but we

don't seem to laugh anymore this is

about what happened with Steve today

isn't it cuz it's not what you think Mrs

H it's not just that then what is it

tell me I can change we can laugh again

look remember when I hit my head with

the garbage

C oh good

times stop it don't make this any harder

than it already is is I want to be free

I want to spread my wings what is that

supposed to mean that I'm holding you

back you want to know the truth Mrs

H Steve wanted me that's right he wanted

me bad but I turned him down because of

you because for the last year that we've

shared a business card I have never not

once tried to get my resume in someone

else's inbox dang it van I already know

that he called me what yeah he does want

you he want you really bad and if you

don't take this job you're going to

regret it maybe not today maybe not

tomorrow but soon and for the rest of

your

life CA blanket was on TV last

night whoa whoa whoa so wait a minute

you're you're not breaking up with me no

yes no one breaks up with the van

man but you ought to break up with me

then you got to take that job believe me

if he offered to take me and not you I'd

go no you wouldn't yes I would no you

wouldn't okay I wouldn't but I'd regret

it maybe not today maybe not tomorrow oh

I forget

it Mrs H I am not going to leave you a

fan no listen you took me in during My

Darkest Hour you put a roof over my

family's head you you gave me a

career heck woman you saved my life I

mean so what if you're a little

you really are loyal yeah I

am now if you excuse me I'm going to go

brush my teeth with

[Music]

Aquafresh hey what's that oh this is

your uh dad's situp machine it's an

exercise machine for old people who

don't want to

exercise it's called the I give up

2000 so what's it do for all I can tell

it doesn't do

anything Yello Oh hey Mr

Norris van you don't have it turned

on what yeah yeah well you know it was

a difficult decision for me to make it's

just that Mrs H and I

are an unbreakable team but uh no I

really

think that I would work well with you at

I think I have really good people skills

yeah so um what oh no I'm fine I just

have a little cold uh but uh you know I

you

know Mr Norris I got to call you back

okay come here you little sh shrimp

[Music]