Original subtitles

YO-O-O, JOE!

♪ HE'LL FIGHT FOR FREEDOM WHEREVER THERE'S TROUBLE ♪

♪ G.I. JOE IS THERE

♪ G.I. JOE, A REAL AMERICAN HERO ♪

♪ G.I. JOE IS THERE

♪ IT'S G.I. JOE AGAINST COBRA THE ENEMY ♪

♪ FIGHTING TO SAVE THE DAY

♪ HE NEVER GIVES UP, HE'S ALWAYS THERE ♪

♪ FIGHTING FOR FREEDOM OVER LAND AND AIR ♪

♪ G.I. JOE, A REAL AMERICAN HERO ♪

♪ G.I. JOE IS THERE

G.I. JOE IS THE CODE NAME

FOR AMERICA'S DARING, HIGHLY TRAINED SPECIAL-MISSION FORCE.

ITS PURPOSE -- TO DEFEND HUMAN FREEDOM AGAINST COBRA,

A RUTHLESS TERRORIST ORGANIZATION

DETERMINED TO RULE THE WORLD.

♪ HE NEVER GIVES UP

♪ HE'LL STAY TILL THE FIGHT'S WON ♪

♪ G.I. JOE WILL DARE

♪ G.I. JOE, A REAL AMERICAN HERO ♪

♪ G.I. JOE

[ CLOCK CHIMING ]

WELL, DUKE, WE'RE ONLY 15 MILES FROM THE COAST OF BRITAIN,

AND NO COBRA.

MAYBE WE SLIPPED BY THEM.

DON'T COUNT ON IT, ADMIRAL.

COBRA WON'T LET US SET UP THIS NEW ANTI-COBRA RADAR SYSTEM WITHOUT A FIGHT.

ADMIRAL, BOGEYS AT 2:00.

HOW LONG BEFORE THEY'RE ON US?

LESS THAN A MINUTE, SIR.

COME ON, SHIPWRECK!

HELP GET THE SkyStrikers AIRBORNE, PRONTO!

SQUASHED BY A SQUASH! [ SQUAWKS ]

BATTLE STATIONS! BATTLE STATIONS!

YO-O-O, JOE!

NOTHING PRETTIER THAN A COBRA IN YOUR CROSSHAIRS.

DUKE, WATCH IT.

THERE'S A COBRA AT YOUR BACK DOOR.

THANKS, FLINT. I SEE HIM.

PREPARE TO BECOME ONE WITH THE UNIVERSE, JOE.

OH, YEAH?

NOW YOU SEE ME.

NOW YOU DON'T.

NOW I SEE YOU.

NOW I DON'T.

LET'S GET OUT OF HERE WHILE WE STILL CAN.

COME BACK, YOU COWARDS! FIGHT!

OKAY, JOES, BACK TO THE CARRIER.

WE'VE STILL GOT A JOB TO DO.

DESTINY, I AWAIT THY BIDDING.

EXCALIBUR.

[ THUNDER RUMBLING, CRASHES ]

Cobra Commander: I SEE YOUR ATTACK

ON THE JOE CARRIER WENT WELL, DESTRO.

I WON'T BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE

FOR THE COWARDICE OF YOUR MEN, COBRA COMMANDER.

ENOUGH!

WHILE YOU STAND HERE ATTEMPTING TO DEFEND YOUR STUPIDITY,

THE NEW ANTI-COBRA RADAR SYSTEM IS ABOUT TO BE INSTALLED.

IF THAT HAPPENS, COBRA WILL NEVER BE ABLE

TO LAUNCH A SNEAK ATTACK ON THE BRITISH ISLES AGAIN.

THE RADAR SYSTEM WILL BE DESTROYED, COBRA COMMANDER.

YES, DESTROYED.

IT MUST BE...

[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]

...DESTROYED, DESTROYED!

Admiral: THIS STORM'S GOT THE WEATHER BOYS BAFFLED, DUKE,

AND WE CAN'T DOCK TILL IT BREAKS.

WEATHER OR NO WEATHER, COBRA WILL BE BACK

TO TRY TO DESTROY THIS RADAR SYSTEM.

WHAT ABOUT USING THE HOVERCRAFT TO GET THE RADAR SYSTEM ASHORE?

IT'S WORTH THE RISK. LET'S GO FOR IT.

THAT'S IT. PUSH US CLEAR.

[ THUNDER CRASHES ]

HEY, GET A TARP ON THOSE CRATES.

IF THIS AWESOME STORM HITS,

IT'LL WASH US BACK INTO THE SEA.

THE ANTI-COBRA RADAR SYSTEM.

THE FATES HAVE SMILED ON ME THIS DAY.

WITH BUT ONE BLOW FROM EXCALIBUR,

THE NEW JOE RADAR SYSTEM WILL BE USELESS.

HYAH!

COBRA! STOP HIM!

DID YOU SEE WHAT HE DID WITH THAT SWORD?

THE EYE SEES MUCH THE MIND FAILS TO COMPREHEND.

YOU EVER THOUGHT OF GOING INTO THE FORTUNE-COOKIE BUSINESS?

SPIRIT, QUICK KICK, THAT WAY.

CUT HIM OFF.

CUT HIM OFF?

WITH THAT SWORD, HE'S GONNA CUT US OFF.

HEY!

LIKE, HE COULDN'T JUST DISAPPEAR.

AAH!

S-STOP HIM!

[ TIRES SQUEAL ]

WHERE'D THEY GO?

MOTHER NIGHT HAS SWALLOWED THEM BOTH.

OKAY, STORM SHADOW. IT'S WIPEOUT TIME.

[ THUNDER CRASHES ]

AAH!

THE INFORMATION YOU POSSESS

MAY PROVE INVALUABLE TO COBRA COMMANDER.

[ THUNDER CRASHING ]

[ PANTING ]

DUKE, WE CAN'T FIND FOOTLOOSE ANYWHERE.

[ SQUAWKS ]

HEY!

THIS STORM IS NOT NATURAL.

COME ON, SPIRIT. YOU DON'T REALLY BELIEVE THAT, DO YOU?

YOU'D DO WELL TO BELIEVE IT TOO, LADDIE.

NAME'S BEEMISH.

I COME TO TALK ABOUT THE SWORD.

EXCALIBUR IT IS.

YOU MEAN, LIKE IN KING ARTHUR?

AYE.

THIS BE THE HOME OF THE LADY OF THE LAKE,

KEEPER OF EXCALIBUR.

LOOK, UH, BEEMISH, IS IT?

I APPRECIATE THE FOLKLORE, BUT --

SCOFF WHILE YOU MAY, BUT LEGEND SAYS

THAT IF EXCALIBUR IS TAKEN FROM THE LADY,

SHE WILL RAISE UP HER HAND AND DROWN THE BRITISH ISLES.

[ THUNDER CRASHING ]

WOW.

LOOK, BEFORE EITHER OF YOU TWO MUTTONHEADS

START BELIEVING ANY OF THIS SUPERSTITION,

I WANT YOU TO GET OUT THERE AND FIND FOOTLOOSE.

AND THIS TIME, DON'T COME BACK WITHOUT HIM.

STORM SHADOW.

I SEE THE REPORTS OF YOUR DEATH WERE GREATLY EXAGGERATED.

I'VE BROUGHT YOU A GIFT, COBRA COMMANDER,

AND IMPORTANT INFORMATION.

THE G.I. JOE RADAR EQUIPMENT WAS UNLOADED BY HOVERCRAFT

BEFORE THE WORST OF THE STORM HIT.

TOO BAD YOU'LL NEVER GET TO USE THAT INFO, MAN.

AAH!

[ GUN CLICKING ]

CHEAP COBRA JUNK.

STOP HIM!

HYAH!

GET HIM OUT OF HERE NOW!

THAT SWORD -- IT'S INVINCIBLE.

I MUST HAVE IT

BEFORE COBRA COMMANDER REALIZES ITS POWER.

THERE. I FEEL THE PRESENCE OF OUR FRIEND.

I THINK I FEEL A FISH SWIMMING AROUND IN MY SHOE.

Lady Jaye: IT'S NO GOOD, DUKE. THE DAM'S GIVING WAY.

EVACUATE THE VILLAGE, THEN TRY AND SAVE THE RADAR SYSTEM.

RIGHT.

DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME, LADDIE.

-HUH? -WHAT THE --

NOTHING'S GONNA SAVE US NOW

EXCEPT RETURNING EXCALIBUR TO THE LADY OF THE LAKE.

I MAY BE CRAZY, BUT I'M BEGINNING TO BELIEVE HIM.

ME TOO.

HERE, FLINT. THIS'LL WARM YOU UP.

[ GROWLS ]

WHAT IS IT, BOY?

Flint: COBRA! SOUND THE ALARM!

Major Bludd: COBRA!

PULL BACK! PULL BACK!

COME ON, JUNK. LET'S MAKE TRACKS.

WE'RE TAKING YOU SOMEPLACE SAFE TILL THIS STORM BLOWS OVER.

MY KITTY -- I CAN'T LEAVE QUEEN ANNE.

DON'T YOU WORRY, HONEY. WE'LL FIND HER.

COBRA LAUNCHED A MASSIVE ATTACK OUT AT THE MOORS.

OUR MEN PULLED BACK FROM THE BATTLE PLATFORM.

THEN WE'LL MAKE OUR STAND BY THE LAKE.

WE'VE GOT TO PROTECT THE TOWN AND THE RADAR SYSTEM.

BREAK OUT THE ICE AND STRIKE UP THE BAND, BOYS AND GIRLS.

THE PARTY'S ABOUT TO BEGIN.

COME ON, BLOKES! COBRA, ATTACK!

[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]

WE'VE GOT G.I. JOE TRAPPED LIKE RATS.

ATTACK!

THEY GOT US PINNED DOWN.

MUTT, YOU AND JUNKYARD DOUBLE-CHECK THE VILLAGE.

SEE THAT EVERYONE'S BEEN EVACUATED.

I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG WE CAN HOLD THIS POSITION.

YES, SIR.

All: COBRA!

[ SNEEZES ]

CURSE THIS BLASTED ENGLISH WEATHER.

[ SNEEZES ]

AH, THERE IT IS --

THE SWORD...EXCALIBUR.

LET THE FOOLS FIGHT OVER THE RADAR SYSTEM.

I'M SORRY, MY FRIEND,

BUT I MUST HAVE EXCALIBUR NO MATTER WHAT THE COST.

[ SNEEZES ]

NO!

LOOKS EVACUATED TO ME, PAL.

-WHAT DO YOU SAY WE -- [ MEOWING IN DISTANCE ]

[ BARKING ]

HEY, IT'S A KITTY.

WE GOT TO HELP THE POOR THING, JUNK.

COME TO UNCLE MUTT, KITTY.

IF WE DON'T GET SOME HELP SOON, WE'RE BUYING THE FARM.

DON'T PUT IN YOUR ORDER FOR A TRACTOR JUST YET.

UP THERE.

WELL, LOOKY WHAT THE STORM BLEW IN.

YEE-HAW!

NOW, THIS IS WHAT I CALL FLYING.

JUST LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A RAIN BARREL.

YO-O-O, JOE!

PULL BACK!

OKAY, WILD BILL. THANKS FOR THE ASSIST.

WE CAN HANDLE IT FROM HERE ON OUT.

YO-O-O, JOE!

All: YO-O-O, JOE!

RETREAT!

BUT HERE'S A LITTLE SOMETHING TO REMEMBER US BY.

[ MEOWING ]

[ MEOWING ]

[ GROANS ] WHAT THE --

JUNKYARD, YOU ALL RIGHT, BOY?

[ WHIMPERS ]

[ GROANS ]

THERE YOU GO, BOY.

DOWN, BOY, DOWN. COME ON, NOW.

[ MEOWING ]

-WHAT'S THE MATTER, GIRLIE? [ RUMBLING ]

OH, NO.

BRACE YOURSELF, JUNK.

HOLD ON, OLD BUDDY.

MAN, WHAT I WOULDN'T GIVE FOR A NICE, HOT TUB ABOUT NOW.

WOULD YOU SETTLE FOR A COLD FLOOD?

HANG 20, JUNK. YO-O-O, JOE!

[ CHUCKLES ]

MAN, WHAT A RIDE.

WHAT A MESS.

LOOKS LIKE OUR RADAR SYSTEM'S HISTORY.

NO USE WORRYING ABOUT THAT NOW.

MUTT, ORGANIZE A CLEANUP DETAIL.

FLINT, COME WITH ME.

WE GOT SOME MISSING JOES TO TRACK DOWN.

Quick Kick: CAN YOU SEE ANYTHING?

Spirit: ONLY TWO GUARDS.

GOOD.

THAT'LL MAKE IT EASY FOR ME

TO GET IN THERE AND DO A LITTLE RECON.

THE HIGHER THE CLIMB, THE FARTHER THE FALL.

AAH!

[ GROANS ] MY LEG.

OH, WHAT WOULD THE DUKE DO IN A SITUATION LIKE THIS?

[ Imitating John Wayne ] CALL THE NEAREST INDIAN, PILGRIM.

[ IMITATES OWL ]

[ Normal voice ] THAT OUGHT TO BRING HIM.

YOU HURT?

LEG'S BUSTED.

AAH!

I GUESS YOU HEARD MY OWL CALL.

OWL CALL?

SOUNDED MORE LIKE WOUNDED-CHICKEN CALL.

I'LL SET YOUR LEG NOW.

[ GASPS ]

YOU SURE YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING?

[ THUNDER CRASHES ]

MAYBE WE OUGHT TO GET A SECOND OPINION.

[ CRUNCH ]

AAH!

HEY.

I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS. IT'S A MIRACLE.

NO MIRACLE, ANCIENT INDIAN MEDICINE.

I HAVE HEALING POWER.

[ CHUCKLES ]

I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU SAY. IT'S A MIRACLE.

WHY, I'M DANCING IN THE RAIN,

JUST DANCING IN THE RAIN.

[ Thinking ] NEXT TIME, I'LL FIX HIS BRAIN.

HEY, WAIT UP.

I FOUND A SECRET ENTRANCE.

HERE, AFTER YOU.

Footloose: MAN, WHAT TOOK YOU GUYS SO LONG?

GET ME OUT OF HERE.

STAND BACK.

YOU GUYS KNOW WHERE YOU'RE GOING?

HEY, NO PROBLEM.

OPEN IT.

THAT SHOULD HOLD THEM.

BUT NOT FOR LONG. WE GOT TO FIND A WAY OUT OF HERE, PRONTO.

WAIT A MINUTE.

[ GRUNTING ]

I NEED SOMETHING TO CUT WITH.

WILL THIS WORK?

[ CHUCKLES ]

YOU DON'T HAPPEN TO HAVE A MAULER TANK

UNDER YOUR BELT, DO YOU?

HEY, MAN, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

PLAYING A LONG SHOT.

THIS ALWAYS WORKS IN THE MOVIES.

LOOK, I HATE TO SAY THIS, DUKE, BUT WE'RE LOST.

IT'S GONNA TAKE A SIGN FROM ABOVE

TO GET US OUT OF THESE MOORS ALIVE.

ASK, AND YE SHALL RECEIVE.

WELL, WHAT DO YOU KNOW?

UH-OH -- COMPANY.

COME ON. NOW'S OUR CHANCE.

THE DRAWBRIDGE IS THIS WAY.

YOU GUYS GO AHEAD.

I'VE GOT ONE THROWING STAR LEFT.

I'LL HOLD THEM OFF AS LONG AS I CAN.

NO -- TOO DANGEROUS.

IT'S THE ONLY WAY, SPIRIT.

THEN BE CAREFUL.

OR CLEVER.

THERE'S ONE OF THEM. GET HIM!

UH-OH -- NOT AGAIN.

I'LL LOWER THE DRAWBRIDGE.

NOW, IF THEY'D JUST LOWER THE DRAWBRIDGE.

[ LAUGHS ] WE'RE ON A ROLL.

WHAT ELSE SHOULD WE ASK FOR?

UGH. A BULLETPROOF HIDE.

WHERE'S QUICK KICK?

THERE.

EVEN THE MIGHTIEST OAK MUST BEND TO THE WINDS OF FATE.

OH, YEAH?

[ FREEDOM SQUAWKS ]

WE'VE GOT TO GET HELP TO HIM NOW.

[ IMITATES EAGLE ]

AAH!

[ GROANS ] THIS ISN'T MY DAY.

ALL THINGS CONSIDERED, THIS WOULDN'T BE HALF AS BAD

IF THIS BLASTED RAIN WOULD JUST STOP.

WELL, NOW ALL WE NEED IS FOR LADY JAYE

AND THE REST OF THE JOES TO --

-LOOK. -OUR HOVERCRAFT.

YO-O-O, JOE!

AAH! DESTRO, THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT.

[ SNEEZES ]

EXCALIBUR WAS ALMOST MINE!

Duke: WELL, THIS HAS BEEN QUITE A WEEK.

WE NOT ONLY LOST THE RADAR SYSTEM,

BUT WE'RE RESPONSIBLE FOR WRECKING THIS WHOLE TOWN.

AYE, LADDIE. TRUE ENOUGH.

MR. BEEMISH.

BUT REMEMBER, YOU CAN GET ANOTHER RADAR SYSTEM,

AND THE TOWN CAN BE REBUILT.

THE IMPORTANT THING IS

YOU GOT RID OF THEM NASTIES UP AT THE CASTLE,

AND YOU RETURNED EXCALIBUR TO THE LADY OF THE LAKE.

QUEEN ANNE!

YOU FOUND HER JUST LIKE YOU PROMISED.

[ CHUCKLES ]

MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT, MR. BEEMISH.

MAYBE WE DID A GREAT DEAL HERE AFTER ALL.