All language subtitles for The.History.Of.Comedy.S01E06_English

David: Its a life‐and‐death
experience.

You go up there, you take
your life in your hands.

‐My stomach hurts ‐‐ badly.
‐Uh‐huh.

And Ive been
nauseous all day.

Oswalt: Youre overthinking
what youre wearing,

how youre gonna say the first
thing youre gonna say.

‐Hey! Out of the way!
‐I feel sillified.

I wonder, "Why tonight?
Why again?"

Announcer #1: Ladies and
gentlemen, Robin Williams!

Announcer #2: Patton Oswalt!

Announcer #3: Richard Pryor!

Lewis: When I walk onstage,

Im riddled with fear
and excitement,

cause I have no idea
what Im gonna do.

David: Holy shit.
This was the ‐‐ What?

Oh, no. You idiot.

Oh, God.

Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God.

Oh, God.

[ Clicking ]

♪

I despised myself
from pretty much

close to getting out
of the womb.

I was always wrong.
Lets start with that.

When youre always wrong,

you seek an audience
to disprove that theory.

I was just hell‐bent
on having to prove myself.

I know Im right. I cant
be always wrong, you know?

I was the victim.

Goldthwait: My father
was a very strange man.

He was kind of
a performance artist

that was fueled by beer.

Bamford: I was very shy,
and at home,

I was always quiet and didnt
get to speak very often

just because other people

were jibber‐jabbering
a lot, you know?

Some people wouldnt
clam up ‐‐ Mom.

When I did different voices
or different noises,

people say, "Thats weird,"
or, "Shut up."

I feel like theres a fear
of seeming crazy.

Oswalt:
A lot of comedians are people

that are very introverted,
very shy,

very sensitive
to humiliation,

a little narcissistic,
little damaged,

and so the only way to combat it

is to go to the one place
where you are stripped bare.

Weide: The big‐C Change
for comedy was the 60s.

Peoples own neuroses
and foibles

were being addressed
in the routines.

The routines
became more personal.

I dont know if anyone
here knows group analysis.

Its a group of very neurotic
types that meet in a room

a couple of times a week

and sit around and twitch
or something.

[ Laughter ]

And this is an adorable story.

Two of the kids
had gotten married,

and its really cute,

cause its what youd call
a mixed marriage

or an intermarriage
in that the boy was paranoiac

and the girl was schizophrenic.

[ Laughter ]

Theres a big conflict
about which way

they would bring up
the children, you know?

[ Laughter ]

Started in school
with, um, uh, drinking

and...
[ Man laughing ]

I was ‐‐ Really. I was, like,
a real depressed kid, you know?

7, 8 years old,
and Id really get juiced

and get out of my head.
[ Laughter ]

I cant be a wife, I cant be
a writer, I cant be everything!

I cant! I cant! I cant!

And Edgar said, "Youre right."
[ Laughter ]

He said, "Youre right.
I understand this completely."

He said, "Tomorrow morning,
Joan, first thing,

were going to
go out tomorrow

and hire a woman to come in
and be a wife."

[ Laughter ]

Zoglin:
That period was the start
of all the stand‐up comedians

that came after
who were experimenting

with stand‐up comedy
as a form of personal expression

in all sorts of different ways.

When I first saw him
before the show,

he was still trying to decide

whether he could be
a drunken Eskimo,

the Queen of the Vikings,
or a doorknob.

Id rather he came out
simply as himself to begin with,

because when
hes Johnny Winters,

he cannot be imitated.

The wild, wild man ‐‐
my friend, Jonathan Winters.

[ Applause ]

Lewis: When I was 12 or 13,

one of my best friends
called me up once.

It was like a drug deal at 12.
"Come over."

I go, "What? What do you got?"
"You got to hear this."

Do something with a stick.

Watch him do a routine
with a stick.

You can give him anything.

[ Imitating fishing reel
whirring ]

[ Pops lips ]

Well, that was a pretty
good cast, wasnt it, Bob?

I think were onto
something this time.

[ Grunting ]
Im sorry, Margaret.

Try to swim in.

[ Laughter ]

[ Vocalizing ]

[ Laughter ]

The routines are
ridiculously brilliant.

It was endless riffing.

And Im going,
"Whose brain can do that?"

[ Mimics arrow thumping ]

The United Nations...

now recognizes the delegate
from Nasiland."

[ Laughter and applause ]

To be as genius
as Jonathan Winters,

you have to think differently
than normal people.

Hes working within his mind
at a very high level,

at a very fast level.

By thinking that way

and being that untethered
to the rest of us,

you can lose
your mind more easily.

Maron: Jonathan was
a profoundly troubled guy

that had drinking issues,
that had depression issues

that were clinical,
that were deep.

Winters: Verbally, my mother and
my dad were on me constantly.

‐Your dad, too?
‐Oh, yeah.

And it just never let up.

Maron: When you were younger,
did you find yourself

trying to get away
from them in your head?

Yeah.
I ‐‐ I ‐‐ Naturally,

and it got to me.

Nesteroff: He was doing
the hungry i in San Francisco,

and later that night,

Jonathan Winters
left his hotel room,

and the police found him
on the wharf.

He was climbing the mast
of a ship, yelling that,

"Im the man in the Moon."

I was in the middle
of a breakdown,

no question about that.

How do you know when

youre in the middle
of a breakdown?

Well, you begin to hallucinate
and seeing things that, uh...

And not boozing.
I wasnt drinking.

Winters: You know,
a lot of people say,

"Well, Jonathan,
how do you feel?"

and I said, "Man, Im out.
Im out."

[ Laughter ]

Thats what counts, you know?

Cause when youre in there,

"Hello. Is it sunny today?"

"Stay back in there, kid!"
"Oh, yes, Im sorry."

[ Laughter ]

Goldthwait:
If youre going out on stage

and youre being
Jonathan Winters

and youre being really honest
about it in a time

where no one else
is doing that,

thats 100% the edge.

[ Applause ]

Paar: Jonathan Winters!

Ladies and gentlemen,
there he is!

My hair is gray,
my coat is tan,

my pants are black.

If youre not
seeing these colors,

theres nothing wrong
with your TV set.

Youre just watching
the Steve Martin Special,

a wild and crazy guy!

Weide: By the time
we get to the 70s,

comedy started to get away
from punch lines.

Steve Martin was poking fun
at the whole nature of comedy,

taking the standard conventions
and turning it on its ear.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Sorry. Just lost my mind
just for a minute.

[ Laughter ]

Steve Martin had fun with
making fun of

taking yourself seriously,
and the schmoozy,

"Were gonna have
some fun tonight!"

Like, it seemed to mock
what everyone else was doing.

Steve Martin was just so goofy,
and beautiful writing.

I mean, I dont know
if I appreciate that as a kid,

but now I appreciate it,
just the succinctness.

He had very good t‐t‐t‐timing.
Thats not a thing.

[ Laughs ]

Oh, no! Im getting happy feet!
Whoa!

[ Cheers and applause ]

Zoglin: No stand‐up comedian
was ever more successful

at a given time
than Steve Martin.

But in real life,
he was a quiet,

intellectual kind of guy,

and he didnt really take
to that superstardom.

He was such a popular comedian,
and then he just stopped.

And I was there on a night
that, I think, in my mind,

had something to do with it,

where he had this routine about

how he blames himself
for his girlfriends death.

Hes laying all the material
to get to the punch line,

and right before he got to it,

some guy out
in this huge audience,

in the very back
of the auditorium,

gave away the punch line.

And you could tell
he was pissed.

Martin: Today, I realized
that I misunderstood

what my last year
of stand‐up was about.

I had become a party host,

presiding not over
timing and ideas

but over a celebratory
bash of my own making.

If I had understood
what was happening,

I mightve been happier,
but I didnt.

I still thought
I was doing comedy.

Comedy goes in waves that way,

where what we accept
as normal or offbeat

is within the parameters
of our time.

But there are people
that upset the norm,

and there is something
to be said

for being different in comedy.

[ "Mighty Mouse"
theme song plays ]

♪ Mr. Trouble
never hangs around ♪

♪ When he hears
this Mighty sound ♪

♪ Here I come to save the day! ♪

[ Laughter and applause ]

♪ That means that Mighty Mouse
is on the way ♪

My favorite thing
about Andy Kaufman

was that he annoyed
a lot of comedians

who didnt have
a sense of humor.

The joke was
on stand‐up comedy.

[ As Latka ]
I love my wife very much,

but she dont know
how to cook.

You know,
her cooking is so bad...

‐How bad is it?
‐How bad is it?

[ Laughter ]

Her cooking is so bad...

‐How bad is it?
‐How bad is it?

...its terrible.

[ Laughter ]

Kaufman: When I was starting,
up until then,

the only performers
you had were either

straight singers or comedians.

Ive never told a joke
in my life, really.

Ive never really done
what they call straight comedy.

Wow.

Andy Kaufman was just the
most fun you could ever have.

Ive never ‐‐ in my 44 years
of watching,

Ive never seen someone
take an audience

through the kind of emotional
roller coaster

that he was able to do.

I would say Kaufman was
the only one

I ever saw truly
work without a net.

Well, how many people
want me to stay?

[ Cheers and applause ]
How many ‐‐

[ Coughs ]

Now, how many people
dont want me ‐‐

dont want me to stay?

[ Mixed cheers, booing ]

Thank you.
Thank you very much.

Youve shown me
where Im at tonight.

And Im sorry that I brought you
all down at this party.

All of his intentions
were different

than every other comedian.

He was trying to get a reaction,

and it really was art more
than straight stand‐up comedy.

But Im gonna get off.
‐No!

‐So thank you.
‐No!

[ Voice breaking ] Y‐You really
showed me where Im at tonight.

[ Fake sobbing ]

[ Laughter ]

[ Gibberish ]

You! You ruined everything!

[ Gasping ]

[ Drumming ]

[ Sobbing,
gasping rhythmically ]

[ Vocalizing, sobbing, gasping ]

[ Cheers and applause ]

Thank you.

Ay‐ya‐ya‐ya‐ya!

[ Laughter ]

My worst fears are confirmed.

Im going totally
under their heads.

[ Raspy exhale ]

I was really influenced
by Andy Kaufman.

I was self‐destructive,
but I was also kind of infamous.

[ Laughing, snorting ]

My earlier stand‐up was like,

"Oh, Ill show you crazy,"
you know? [ Chuckles ]

[ Gruff, high‐pitched voice ]
Well, it is sweeps,

and I love Jay very much,
and I thought,

"Well, what if I ‐‐
I dont know ‐‐"

What are you doing?

"What if I set his furniture
on fire?"

No, dont set that
on fire.

[ Laughter ]

[ Raspy breathing ]

Now you have to sit
in this.

Now sit down.
Sit down.

Sit down. Sit down.

Im not sitting in it!

Sit in that chair.

I set "The Tonight Show"
on fire ‐‐

Actually, I just set the chair
on "The Tonight Show" on fire.

And I am a convicted arson
because I brought lighter fluid.

That made it premeditated.

I learned a lot about the law.

[ Audience booing ]

I would just do stuff,
and I would think,

"Well, this is funny to me,"

and genuinely be surprised
when things didnt go well.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Oh!

I used to think that the mind
of a comedian

was like that of an addict ‐‐
big ego,

insecure, driven.

But I do believe now
that we are susceptible,

a little bit, to madness.

[ Chuckles ]

Well ‐‐
Well be right back!

Well ‐‐
Well be right back!

Well be right back!

There are things about you
that you just dont like,

that you wish you could change.

You wish you were smarter.

You wish you were
better‐looking.

You wish you were, um ‐‐
had more confidence.

But ‐‐ But you dont.

[ Laughing ]

I had to be funny,
I had to be likable.

I was a bed‐wetter
well into my teens.

You know, theres a lot
of humiliation to overcome,

and being the funny one at camp

is a really good deal

if youre also the one
that smells like pee.

If youre a comedian,
there is a part of you

that is unhinged and,
more importantly, unhappy.

Im friends
with mostly comedians,

and, like, most of us
are on antidepressants.

[ Chuckles ]

And I dont think
thats a coincidence.

As you see in the news,
comics can mess up, you know?

We do everything
from shoot at our cars

to O. D., and were the people
who make people happy, you know?

Watkins: Richard Pryor grew up
in a very unusual situation.

His grandmother ran
a house of prostitution,

and his mother had worked in it,
his father was a pimp,

and he was very aware
of that situation growing up.

I grew up seeing my mother
go into rooms with men

and my aunties
go into rooms with men.

Walters: Who believed in you?
Who cared about you?

Richard Franklin Lennox
Thomas Pryor III...

You.

...and magic dust.

Rain:
My dads humor came from life.

And I dont think
Dad had a choice.

I think you either
laugh your way through it

or you die through it.

Thinking about that, though,

Id like to die
like my father died.

Right?
My father died fuckin.

[ Laughter ]

He did. My father was 57
when he died, right?

And the woman was 18.

My father came and went
at the same time.

[ Laughter ]

Richards comedy was funny.
It was also therapeutic.

It was almost like this guy
was using the stage

the way a therapist
would use their couch.

My grandmothers the lady that
used to discipline me, right?

You know, beating my ass.

You know, "Get your ass out ‐‐
Put your hand down!

Put your ‐‐
Dont you run from me!

Dont you run...

from...me!

As long as you black,
dont you run from me!"

[ Laughter and applause ]

Bell: What people took from him
was a lot of the attitude

and the over‐the‐topness
and the profanity.

The thing that people dont give
Richard Pryor enough credit for

is what he brought to stand‐up
comedy was vulnerability.

[ Cheers and applause ]

David: For me, the best night
was having a woman

that was sitting close
to the stage beg me to stop.

She was looking at me,
and shes going...

In pain.
Her face was in pain.

She was in pain. She went,

[Strained] "Please stop!
Please stop! Please stop!"

[ Laughs ]
You cant beat that.

The one thing about Hitler
that I admire

is that he wouldnt take any
shit from magicians, you know?

[ Laughter ]

It brings out the best parts
of your personality.

It brings out your "best self."

Hello. It does.

You like yourself
when youre up there.

You like yourself.

Oswalt: Thank you.
Seriously, thank you.

You have no idea what
a good mood Im in right now.

This is ‐‐
Fuck, this went so well!

Okay. Um...
[ Clears throat ]

[ Cheers and applause ]

It wasnt that things
went so well for an hour.

It was that, for an hour,

you kept a potential disaster
from being a disaster.

Thats where
the high comes off of.

[ Cheers and applause ]

The worst is when you are
trying out new material,

and you think youre
in a safe space

because nobody in the audience
knows who you are,

the stakes are very low.

And you just eat it,

and then you discover
that Louis C. K.

has been in the audience
the entire time.

[ Laughter ]

Man: Bullshit!

Bullshit? My dick.

[ Laughter and applause ]

‐This is ‐‐
‐[ Screaming ]

Shut the fuck up. Hey!

[ Laughter and applause ]

I got hit with Bibles and boots.

You know, I got hit
with a teenager once.

All these little fried shrimp
started hitting me.

They threw these, like ‐‐
They looked like subway tokens.

I just got pelted with them.

Ive had a glass thrown at me.

A shot glass comes
at a much faster speed.

Ive also been punched onstage.

Williams:
Its like street fighting

and performing combined,
you know?

Cause you get people
so loaded, they cant see.

Cavett: And youre fighting
for your life up there.

Oh, yeah. Thats where
you learn real quick lines.

You know, you have to start ‐‐
You get real tough,

cause I saw a lot of friends
who were very funny,

but gave it up
after one or two times.

[ Indistinct conversations ]

Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen,
Home Box Office and the Roxy

are pleased to present
Robin Williams!

[ Cheers and applause ]

Williams: Hiya!

I guess most of my stuff
is just madness.

Its a totally
different perspective.

You know, its a combination
of writing and acting

at the same time,
which work wonderfully.

[ Laughs ]
Im doing fantastic!

[ French accent ]
No, youre not, you fool.

Youre not doing essence,
just pure pee‐pee‐caca!

No reality, no truth,

no discussion
on the nature of man!

[ Sternly ]
Both of you be quiet. Shut up!

Im the rational mind.

Well have to release
the subconscious.

Hell be the arbitrator.

[ Imitates creaking ]

[ Grunting, snarling ]

[ Laughter and applause ]

Boosler:
I totally think Robin Williams

had a pinball‐machine head.

I just think, you know,
he would just pull his tongue,

and then the ball
would get launched,

and it would just
bounce off everything.

It was definitely
stardust and magic.

Ferguson:
It was self‐expression,

and Robin went anywhere
that the words

and the informality of thought,
the mad‐‐ the madness,

I guess ‐‐ the harvested madness
would take us.

And I loved that.

Look, toys,
all over the set.

Can we ‐‐ Dont be afraid.

Come on, Mr. Camera,
were going crazy. Come on.

[ Laughter and applause ]

Goldthwait: When he would just
take these flights of fancy,

it might go on for 10 minutes
or 20 minutes.

You know, that was the magical
part of watching him.

[ High‐pitched voice ]
Mother gave this

so I could write my new book.

[ Laughter ]

[ Middle Eastern accent ]
Buddha? No, an ode
to Fred Silverman.

[ Laughter ]

[ Lisping ]
Take 2, lets go.

Lets start from
the beginning again.

Auto, props, lets go.

[ Laughter ]

Nesteroff: But like a comedians,
when he was offstage,

he was full of fear,
full of anxiety.

About what? Who knows.

He himself said
he was full of dread,

and he didnt know why.

He just was overwhelmed
with anxiety.

But he definitely used
the stage to be free,

to be comfortable,
to be himself.

Im being grotesque,
but you got to be.

You see what I mean?
You got to be crazy.

Its too late to be sane.

Too late.

You got to go
full‐tilt bozo.

[ Laughter ]

Cause youre only given
a little spark of madness.

And if you lose that...

youre nothing.

[ Cheers and applause ]

♪

Gottfried: After performing,
if its a good show,

theres that high that
youll get from that,

but then you
walk off the stage.

And I could see why
a lot of performers

would want to do drugs
and drink,

just to keep
some kind of high going.

[ Laughter ]

When youre famous,
people give you drugs

because they just ‐‐
number one,

it kind of gives them
a little control over you.

And they like knowing that,
you know,

"I got him high.
I got him loaded.

[ Chuckling ]

And know what he did? He looked
out the window the whole time."

Oswalt: Comedians
are a lunar profession,

not a solar profession.

Youre gonna end up
getting irregular sleep,

really bad food.

It has the same rhythms
as combat,

where its a lot of boredom

and then incredible tension

and either victory
or just crushing failure.

Theres no in between.

Oh, God. Hey.
Now I need it.

Now I need this.
[ Cheers and applause ]

Hicks: They tell you
marijuana smoking

makes you unmotivated.

Thats bullshit.

When I was high,

I could do everything I normally
could do just as well.

I just realized it wasnt
worth the fucking effort, man.

That was it.
[ Laughter ]

Benson: People say pot smokers
are lazy. I disagree.

Im a multitasking pot smoker.

I was walking down the street,

I was putting eye drops
in my eyes,

I was talking on my cellphone,

and I was getting hit by a car.

[ Laughter ]

All comedians, 9 out of 10,
seem to be potheads.

Theres something about
the playfulness of marijuana,

the thought process,
the giggle aspect,

that is similar to
the comic mind, in a way.

I like to have a puff of pot
when I get offstage

because its just so hard
to come down after.

[ Gruff, high‐pitched voice ]
And Im watching MTV,

and the lead singer
from Motley Crue comes on,

and he tells me
not to take drugs?

[ Laughter ]

Motley Crues idea
of a drug problem

is not finding any after a gig.

[ Laughter ]

I did too many drugs,
is what Im saying.

I did too many drugs.

And when I say I did them,
I fuckin did them.

I didnt "experiment" with them.

You know, when people say,
"Oh, yeah,

when I was in my late teens
and 20s,

I experimented with drugs."

No, you fuckin didnt.
Youre not a scientist.

[ Laughter ]

The desire to feel okay can
manifest itself in performance,

it can manifest itself
in drugs and alcohol,

it can manifest itself
in any number of behaviors,

but its not necessary to be
a drunk or a drug addict

to be a good performer.

Its not science

to blow a dealer for crack!

Thats not science!

[ Laughter ]

Thats art.

[ Laughter and applause ]

Gottfried: When theyll
talk about John Belushi

or Chris Farley, theyll say,

"Well, you know, there was
the great side of him,

the side that would just
take his clothes off

and hang off the ledge
of a building.

That was the fun side.

But then there was the bad
side ‐‐ the drugs and drinking,"

and you go, "Hmm, maybe the two
have something in common here."

[ Sighs ]

Lewis: Im a drug addict
and an alcoholic.

I didnt know for a while.
I was in denial for years.

I said, "Im not an alcoholic.
Im not an alcoholic.

Im not an alcoholic."
I was a mess.

I didnt know what was going on.

I think my dad and his friends
did more cocaine

than was ever in
the movie "Scarface."

That became the thing that,

for a moment,
got rid of the pain.

Until youre clean and youre
like, "Oh, Im just me."

I did it so bad, dope dealers
tried not to sell me none.

[ Laughter ]

Now, thats doing it
where dope dealers just say,

"Man, I aint gonna give you
no more of that shit.

Im sorry, brother. I cant
see you do it to yourself."

Now, thats ‐‐ Dope dealers
dont give a fuck

about nothing, usually,
people think.

These motherfuckers refused
to sell me cocaine.

Said, "No, motherfucker,
youre killing yourself."

What?
[ Laughter ]

Williams:
Heres a little warning sign

if you have a cocaine problem.

If on your tax form,
it says $50,000 for snacks,

mayday!

[ Laughter, cheers, applause ]

You got yourself a cocaine
problem, smartass! [ Laughing ]

[ Screaming ]

Maron: I met Sam when he was
about to become huge.

He kind of took me under
his wing, to a degree.

He neutered my ability to ‐‐
[ Laughing ]

to function through drug use

and draining me by making me
party with him for hours on end.

So, Im trying to be like ‐‐ Im
trying to live up to the image,

"Oh, get out of my way!
Watch me! Aah!"

[ Sniffs deeply ]

And I would sniff
all this shit up.

About two minutes later,
Im walking around the party

going...

Hey, man.

Hey, man, we got
any shoe polish

or something I can drink
to slow this down?

[ Laughter ]

Listen, you guys keep partying.
Im gonna go ahead and lay down

and beg God to live for a while,
all right?

Oswalt:
Sometimes drugs and alcohol

have led to
some amazing comedy ‐‐

amazing music,
amazing literature,

amazing sculpture and painting.

But in the end,

the drugs and alcohol
always beat art.

Back up. Get back.

Reporter: John Belushi
died today at 33 years old.

Belushi died in a bungalow
at the Chateau Marmont Hotel

in Hollywood.

Sources have told
Eyewitness News

that the nightstand
in Belushis bungalow

contained what was described
to us as a fair amount

of white powder,
believed to be cocaine.

Zoglin: When you get to
that level of fame

and youve got the money
and youve got a lot of enablers

around you,
its easy to keep going

and keep on
a self‐destructive path,

and its hard to stop.

The actor/comedian
Chris Farley was found dead

in a Chicago apartment today.

Reporter:
Farley followed his idol

John Belushis path of success,

and along the way,

friends say he succumbed
to the same excesses ‐‐

food, alcohol, and drugs.

When you have
that kind of brain ‐‐

and I dont want to get
into the stuff ‐‐

except that youre wired dark.

You can go dark real fast.

Rain:
Dad couldnt take it anymore,
and he wanted it to stop.

He just was like,
"I want it to stop."

Richard Pryor,
the comedian and writer,

was badly burned in an accident
at his home

in California last night.

The burns cover
the upper half of his body.

They are severe enough
to endanger his life.

Finally, tonight, comedian
Richard Pryor is feeling better.

Doctors at his Sherman Oaks,
California, hospital

have taken him
off the critical list.

Pryor is responding well
to skin‐graft treatments

for burns he suffered
at his home three weeks ago.

Nesteroff: Youve gone through
a tragedy, youre a comedian,

youre gonna go up on stage
and talk about that tragedy.

Thats what
the comic mind does.

Youre compelled
to tell your experience.

Im gonna tell yall the truth
tonight. Okay?

[ Cheers and applause ]

All right, now, all my friends
know this to be true,

cause everybody
who knows me, usually,

before I go to bed,
I have milk and cookies.

[ Laughter ]

And one night,
I had some low‐fat milk

and some pasteurized,

and I mixed them together,

and I dipped my cookie,
and the shit blew up.

[ Laughter, cheers, applause ]

Rain: My dad wasnt afraid
to bear his pain.

He made jokes about that

because he knew
you were gonna do it,

"so let me do it."

You know, dad had
some steel balls, man.

Well, Ill tell you
one thing, man.

When that fire hits your ass,

that will sober
your ass up quick.

[ Laughter, cheers, applause ]

And you know
something I found out?

When you on fire
and running down the street,

people will get out
of your way.

[ Laughter ]

Except for one old drunk, right?

Hes going, "Hey, buddy,
can I get a light?"

[ Laughter ]

"How bout just a little off
the sleeve, okay?"

Maron: When Pryor did talk
about his personal life,

its harrowing,

and its funny because
of the courage of it.

But does everyone relate
to setting yourself on fire

with a pipe or shooting your car
so your wife cant leave in it?

You have to grow to accept that
people may be laughing with you,

they might be laughing at you,

or they might be laughing
cause theyre shocked.

You know, if I hadnt
of done this,

Id be in great despair now.

But Ive done it, and its out
there for everybody to see.

Regardless of what the reaction
is, its out there,

and I did it,
and Im glad I did it.

Lopez: If you want to put
someone on a pedestal

that is unattainable
by anybody else,

it has to be a guy who ran
a mile and a half on fire,

who did coke, crashed cars,

drank, and then took it to the
stage and made everyone laugh.

This is incredible.
How do you get to the Met?

Money.
Lots and lots of money.

[ Laughter, cheers, applause ]

Goddamn. I wonder if Pavarottis
at The Improv going,

[ Italian accent ]
"Two Jews walk into a bar. Yes."

[ Laughter ]
For me, its therapy.

Its another world for me.
Its so much.

Its such a great release.
It was such freedom.

Its wonderful, its great.
Its a whole other world.

Now, this is when I knew
I was in a bad neighborhood.

You only see this
in the worst neighborhoods.

Remember,
its 3:00 in the morning.

There was a fuckin baby
standing on the corner.

[ Laughter, cheers, applause ]

When Im onstage,
I get real happy up there.

Like, maybe thats
the only time in my adult life

that I feel like myself.

Youre standing up there...
You know what I mean?

...like a gladiator,
and them lights is on you,

and you look down,

and everyones looking up
at you like...

[ Laughter ]

Doing comedy,
its needing to express,

needing to expose yourself.

Sometimes I find myself
telling audiences

my deepest, darkest secrets.

You know, its this odd
confessional.

When I moved to L. A.,
I had an eyebrow, and...

[ Laughter ]

...my roommate
at the time was like,

"Hey, lets go
make this into two."

And so I went
to her waxing lady.

Id never been to, like,
a waxing lady,

and the lady called me in,

and Im, like,
following her into her room,

and she turns around,
and she goes,

"What are we doing today?
Just the mustache?"

[ Laughter ]

I did have OCD. I had difficulty
making eye contact with people

for ‐‐ about until
the age of 32.

And so stand‐up was so great

for a way to connect with people

that felt very safe.

I was a bit of a dark kid.

I would occasionally stage
my own death for fun.

[ Laughter ]

"Mother, Ive taken
a whole bottle of pills."

"Oh, my God.
What did you take?"

"Tums."
[ Laughter ]

"Maria, those are
your fathers."

"What, Mother?
I cant hear you.

The calcium is coursing
through my veins."

[ Laughter ]

From the very beginning,

I was going up there to find
myself and to be myself.

But when I went through
a divorce,

when I was separated,
I went onstage,

and I started
working through it.

And I dont know
if it was funny.

It was profoundly uncomfortable.

I am a panicky, angry man.

[ Laughter ]

I make calls like this ‐‐
"Dude, Im losing my mind!

No, Im having
a breakdown or something!

Im serious ‐‐
Oh, youre tired?

All right, take the day off.
Ill call the other guy."

[ Laughter and applause ]

"Dude, Im losing my mind!
No, for re‐‐ No, no, no!

Its your day. Its your day."

[ Laughter ]

"So make me feel better,
friend‐o. Do it."

You know, I take great pride

in not ever repeating a problem
on any special,

so, um...

All right, if youll
permit me, uh...

[ Laughter ]

Woman: Damn.

My feelings were so deeply hurt
in many ways that,

if I couldnt
get it out with comedy,

it was a waste of time.

Ahh. You know, basically,

what I really feel
I got from my family

is low self‐esteem,

which, uh ‐‐ it runs deep.

It started with
my grandparents.

They lived in this condo
in Florida ‐‐

Death Wish Village,
which they...

[ Laughter ]

Laughs are a great
healer of pain.

But the laugh is over,
and theres the pain again.

Reporter:
Comedian Robin Williams

was found dead this morning

inside his Northern California
home.

His publicist says,
as of late,

Williams had been battling
severe depression.

He was 63 years old.

Maron: Theres no more
painful realization

that the other side
of whatever comic genius is,

it is sometimes this,

that with that sensitivity,
that with that love,

that with that mental agility

comes a heart too heavy to live,

a heart that becomes so heavy

that it chooses not to go on.

Its horribly sad.

Whoo!

Goldthwait: He beat depression.

Cause thats what comics do ‐‐
we beat depression.

But he had a disease
called Lewy Body Dementia.

His dementia is why
I firmly believe

the events happened
the way they did.

Him taking his life
was not just a reaction

to having that disease.
I feel it was because of it.

It was misinformation
that his own brain ‐‐

his brain was attacking himself.

Theres a phrase youve used
on a number of occasions

to make us understand you.

Williams: Mm‐hmm.

And that phrase
is legalized insanity.

Yes.

Not that we need
to ask now...

[ Laughter ]

Yes.

It may be superfluous,
but...

[ Laughter ]

...what is legalized
insanity?

Well...

[ Laughter ]

The idea of just
trying the things

that other people
wouldnt do.

Robin was so close to the source
of where the thought

was coming from ‐‐
Like dogs, you know?

Its like, "What? Huh? What?"
It was just brilliant.

Heres the line,
and Im going, "Hee‐hee!"

[ Laughter ]

You know?

That kind of helps,
I think...

Yeah.

...just to push
the boundaries a little bit.

Yeah. Um...

[ Laughter ]

This is so much fun.

[ Laughter, cheers, applause ]

I agree with you.

This is nice.

[ Indistinct conversations ]

Zoglin: The comic
is a personal confessor,

exposing himself
in all sorts of ways.

They help us process
the sensitive subjects.

Stand‐up comedians
are really important.

"Okay. Okay. So, you have,
like, psychological problems."

[ Laughter ]

Yeah, I probably need
to see a therapist.

"Okay.
So, its not something

you can talk about
with your friends?"

Well, I talk about it,
but theyre like,

"Why cant you
come out tonight?"

I say, "Cause Im filthy."
They say, "Take a shower."

I say, "No, its on the inside!"

[ Laughter ]

Im all about talking
about everything.

And it helps me feel
that usefulness

that maybe I can tell somebody,

"Youre not alone,
and there is help,

and you dont have to suffer
from this anymore."

"Well, I dont get it.

Apparently,
shes supposed to be funny.

I just think
she is schizophrenic."

[ Chuckles ]

Well, clearly, that is
not my mental illness.

Um, schizophrenia is, of course,

hearing voices,
not doing voices.

[ Laughter ]
Now, if youll excuse me,

I have to get back
to La Quinta,

because I have faces to make
in the bathroom mirror.

Whoom.
Whoom.

Being onstage, I found out,
slowly but surely,

that I wasnt crazy
and always wrong,

that I was having the same fears
and trepidations

and insecurities as most people.

17 years of therapy ‐‐
what has it done to me?

Nothing. I masturbate to ‐‐
I dont know ‐‐

to less destructive
women, quite frankly.

[ Laughter ]

When I finally,
22 years ago, admitted,

"Hi, Im Richard.
Im an alcoholic,"

my comedy was freed up.

I mean, I was doing well.

I was doing specials
and Carnegie Hall

and getting nominated
for this and that,

but I still
wasnt me yet, you know?

Once I said,
"Im a drug addict," whoa, man!

I just felt, like, great.

To be honest with you, really,

in the day and age
we live in now,

if someone comes up
to you and says,

"I think you might be
clinically depressed,"

the proper response is,
"Thank you. Thank you very much.

That means Im awake."

[ Cheers and applause ]

I thought that stand‐up comics
had some higher purpose,

and I was trying
to work through things,

and I was trying
to find some truths

and frame them in a way
that would be new

and exciting for me
and then for the audience,

that wed be moving
through that stuff together.

Once, when I was
at lifes lowest ebb,

and I felt like no one would
ever love or accept me,

I thought Id kill myself.

And I checked in to a motel room
in the middle of nowhere,

and I was lying there
in the dark,

when all of a sudden,
there was a warm glow of light.

And I looked up and Christ
was standing over me like this.

And I looked up at him,
and he looked down at me,

and finally, he spoke,
and said,

"Gilbert, am I fat?"

[ Laughter ]

I always think
of those two masks ‐‐

the comedy mask
and the tragedy mask ‐‐

they go together.

So if something terrible
has happened to you,

comedy is not gonna
kill tragedy,

but itll get it to lose
its grip for a while.

I started reducing my Prozac,
day by day,

trying to wean myself off of it.

Then, a month with no Prozac,
oh.

My depression was
like a happy puppy

just running through my body.

I actually felt bad about

going back on the Prozac,
cause I felt like,

"Oh, I havent taken him
to the park in a while."

Like, I wanted to give him
a couple of days just to,

"Put your bathrobe
for eight days straight!"

Okay, Depression. I know
I havent done this in a while.

Does this feel better?

"Watch Princess Bride
11 times in a row!"

Okay. Lets watch
"The Princess Bride"

11 times in a row.

[ Laughter, cheers, applause ]

Oh, Depression, this is
the best day youve ever had.

[ Laughter ]

Either in small or big ways,
comedy has kept someone

out of depression or suicide
or helped them cope with a loss,

and you remember that.

If you can talk about
something openly

and you find the right way
to do it,

it takes away all of its power,
and thats really beautiful.

Williams: I find comics to be
pretty honest people,

in terms of looking at stuff
from both sides or all sides

and presenting you with, like,
"Here it is."

In the process
of looking for comedy,

you have to be deeply honest,

and in doing that,
youll find out,

"Heres the other side."

Youll be looking under the rock
occasionally for the laughter.

Being a comedian who lives on
making fun of everything

around him, the ridiculousness
of everything,

to come through something
horrendous and to be alive,

you got to have
a sense of humor.

If you dont, you go mad.

Goldthwait: Stand‐up comedians
should be out there

pointing out the flaws,

basically saying to people,

"Hey, does this look
right to you?"

You know, "This is weird."

Ill hear somebodys
metaphorical interpretation

of an idea in a new way,
and my brain lights up,

but Im like [gasps]
"Oh, I love it!"

You know,
it just feels so good.

And the relief of laughing
together

and the victory of a good joke,

were all responsible
for the win.

[ Laughs ] Its a team sport.

[ Cheers and applause ]

The mind of a stand‐up comedian
is a scary, scary place.

No, a mind of
a stand‐up comedian ‐‐

its really sweet of you

to imply that theres thought
behind what we do.

What kind of person
chooses to do that?

A pretty independent person,

somebody who doesnt like,
maybe, having bosses.

Im sorry. Did I say comedians
were a little narcissistic?

Theyre a lot narcissistic.

Well be right back.

Theres nothing else
that we can do.

Theres no
other skills.

So its either
that or nothing.

By the way,
I like documentaries.

I just dont like being
in documentaries.

Dont confuse the two.
[ Chuckles ]