Original subtitles

Now, I dont know if you get all the news here in Nashville.

But I may say something thats very upsetting to many of you.

The good thing about doing topical comedy

is you look like

youre more intelligent than you are.

Well, lets go to the news and see what we can unfurl there.

Kirkman: You have to be smarter

than the first thought that everyone had.

Im sorry, Im being told that I dont have an earpiece.

Bell: If something happens at 3:00 in the afternoon

and youre going on stage at 8:00 at night

and you can have turned that into a joke,

thats part of the high.

It would be weird if I didnt make a joke

the day of a tragedy.

Kimmel: Sometimes when Im at home late at night on Twitter,

I think of something, and I say, "I could end it all right now

with these two little thumbs."

North Korea conducted what they claim

was a successful test

of the their biggest nuclear warhead yet,

so congrats to them. Thats great.

Im glad theyre finally figuring that out.

Its really...

Will someone please tell Kim Jong‐un

they like his new glasses

and he looks like he lost weight

so he doesnt kill everybody on the West Coast?

When it comes to comedy, you look for something

that people know about or are talking about,

and then you want to give your take on it.

When you do topical humor, it goes right to the brain

and the heart and the stomach all at the same time.

You know...

they re‐introduce the McRib every [bleep] year.

Its not big news.

OBrien: The power of topical humor is everybodys on the same page.

It is already primed, and theyre laughing already.

So then your joke has rocket fuel in it.

McGraw: The best comedy feels novel,

like youve never heard it before.

And, you know, the things that are happening in the headlines

give rise to brand‐new jokes.

Man: We interrupt this broadcast to bring you

this important bulletin from the United Press.

Flash, the White House

announces Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor.

Nesteroff: World War II was the most uniting war

in the history of the United States.

So it was natural that the biggest comedian in America

would participate in the war effort.

Say, Id like to stop the show for just a few minutes here

and explain exactly why were here.

We want you to buy extra war bonds.

Zoglin: When the war started,

Bob Hope really became the voice of America.

People turned to him to make jokes about what was going on.

He was not the first topical comedian.

But what Bob did was take that topical monologue

and add to it the Vaudeville rhythm,

the joke‐telling rhythms.

Thank you! How do you do, fellas?

This is Bob.

This is Bob "Command Performance" Hope

telling each Nazi thats in Russia today

that Crimea doesnt pay.

[ Laughter ]

White: It was a very dark time generally,

but Bob could always shrug his shoulders and say,

"Well, lets tackle this." [ Chuckles ]

All right, lets talk about it.

And somewhere in talking about it, hed find a laugh.

And, boy, that helps.

Up here, a Marilyn Monroe calendar

isnt a luxury, its a necessity.

[ Laughter ]

Zoglin: That topical kind of monologue

was something brand new.

It seems like a very simple thing,

but thats what Bob Hope really innovated.

Man: It takes a lot to mount a big show,

long hours deep into the night

constantly revising the script.

Revisions made necessary by last‐minute changes

in a changing world.

Lopez: Bob Hope was the first guy to utilize an actual staff

of writers to give you topical material of the day.

OBrien: He really did invent the idea

of the comedian being the head writer,

the managing editor, and having a bunch of writers.

Weide: The traditions of stand‐up comedy in the 50s

were still really derived from Vaudeville.

You know, those performers like Bob Hope

had nothing more on their mind than just getting laughs.

And that was plenty.

The guy who really came along and changed all that

was Mort Sahl.

Richard Nixon is running for governor of California,

and I realize sometimes these shows are taped ahead.

I want this material to be topical.

And... Hell be running for something

no matter when the show is on, so, sorry.

Brennan: Mort Sahl was the first person

to talk like a human being on stage.

It wasnt schmaltzy.

He did for comedy what James Dean

and Marlon Brando did for acting,

which is he humanized it.

I have to report to you that the largest news last week

was the Soviet spaceman

was invited to lunch by the queen, as you know.

Just to put your minds at rest,

I probably will not say anything about the queen.

[ Laughter ]

She hasnt mentioned me, has she?

[ Laughter ]

Sacks: He just came out with a newspaper,

and he reacted in live time

to the news as he was reading it,

which is a real high‐wire act.

Bob Hope rather famously said, "You know,

you got to always balance your humor,

or youre gonna offend somebody."

Mort did not care.

Im not the most tolerant guy in the world.

Im very intolerant. In fact, thats the basis of the act.

The act is the statement of a lone guy in rebellion.

Thats why people mistakenly call it negative.

Its mainly me. I dont talk about the news.

Im a victim of the news.

Sacks: The country was ready for something different.

Its almost like Mort Sahl led a revolution

that people didnt even know they needed.

Mort, are you really a bad guy?

All I am is a Western Union messenger,

and sometimes theres bad news in the wire.

But thats not my fault. I only work at the office.

Nesteroff: Mort Sahl influenced this whole generation

of coffee‐house comedians like Lenny Bruce,

Richard Pryor, George Carlin,

whereas Bob Hope with his large writing staff influenced

the format of the late‐night comedy shows.

Announcer: Heres Johnny!

Gonna be a good night. I just saw Bob Hope backstage.

We were talking. You know, its really a wonderful thrill

standing next to one of the greatest comedians

in the entire world.

And Im sure Bob appreciates it.

[ Laughter ]

If you were looking for not just a take on the news,

but the actual news, because I wasnt reading anything

other than the sports and the comics,

Johnny Carson was where you would go.

I saw the headline in the National Inquirer this week.

The headline article was how eating the right foods

can increase your I. Q.

Now, isnt that risky for the Inquirer?

I mean, they could lose all their readership.

OBrien: When Johnny Carson would mock something

that was in the public eye,

everybody was in on it.

He was the most powerful man in Hollywood,

because he could kill you with one joke.

Somebody told Vice President George Bush that Jesse Jackson

was coming to the White House, and Bush says, "Oh, good!

Maybe hell autograph my Thriller album."

[ Laughter ]

Cavett: You wanted to hear what Johnny will say

about anything in the news.

You dont so much care what other comedians say,

but lets see what Johnny will say.

In the paper today, a woman in Michigan ‐‐

I dont know the city, so ‐‐ She was arrested

for soliciting sexual favors.

Thats the way they put it in the paper ‐‐ sexual favors

for spaghetti dinners.

[ Laughter ]

You cant make this kind of stuff up.

Apparently, she never asked a man for money.

All she wanted was just...

[ Laughter ]

...a spaghetti dinner.

My question, technically,

wouldnt that make her a "pastatute"?

Man: Oh, ho! [ Laughter ]

On "Close Up" this morning, the end of an era.

After ruling late‐night television for 30 years,

Johnny Carson steps down tonight.

And so it has come to this. I ‐‐

I am one of the lucky people in the world.

I found something I always wanted to do,

and I have enjoyed every single minute of it.

I bid you a very heartfelt good night.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Its certainly true that with Johnny out,

a vacuum was created.

The big decision thats had the entertainment industry buzzing

is due this week. That, of course, is the fate

of NBCs late night stars Jay Leno and David Letterman.

Viera: "The Tonight Show" without Johnny Carson

as the regular host made its debut last night.

Jay Leno emerged from behind the curtain.

Leno: Oh, I dont care if you laugh.

I got the job. Dont matter to me.

Chung: Look at this. Theyre getting more press than the president.

So start up your remote controls.

The late‐night race is about to begin.

Markoe: Jay was a brilliant stand‐up.

He continued the tradition of Johnny.

He had a big group of monologue writers.

That was the main writing on that show.

He was writing the best topical jokes that anybody could write.

Democratic candidate Bill Clinton said

he is also troubled...

by the amount of sex portrayed on television.

Clinton said where he comes from,

sex is a deeply personal matter

between a candidate and his campaign volunteers.

Yeah, its just ‐‐ [ Laughter ]

Jay is more Bob Hope in the sense

of setup, punch line, setup, punch line,

and he would tap into exactly the best joke

of whatever happened that day.

And, of course, the big story in Hollywood

is still "The Fugitive."

[ Cheers and applause ]

All right. But ‐‐ But enough about Michael Jackson.

You know ‐‐ [ Laughter ]

Anderson: Jay made the jokes the joke.

Dave...

was doing the other side of jokes.

He wanted the laugh he wanted.

These last two jokes

are the intellectual property of NBC.

Who ‐‐ Who would have thought you would ever hear the words

"intellectual property" and "NBC" in the same sentence?

Markoe: There was not much emphasis on that monologue for Dave,

because when we started on late night,

we werent allowed to do a monologue.

We were calling them opening remarks,

because if you called them a monologue

and there were too many of them,

you would have stepped on Johnnys toes.

Now, with that in mind,

lets continue with the opening remarks.

Kimmel: It was just a little off.

It looked like a talk show, kind of.

Sometimes he wore sneakers, which was weird.

And they talked about the events of the day, to a certain extent.

But also was more focused on weirdness

than on the newspaper.

‐"Uh, Daves passing out ham." ‐Yeah.

Kirkman: Dave was a very New‐York‐centered show.

So Jay could be Monica Lewinsky and O. J. trial,

and Dave could be, like,

"There was a squirrel today in the park" ‐‐

you know, just some bizarre, offbeat thing.

So youre not just gonna get monologue jokes

about the front page.

Its whatever Dave wants to do.

And, sometimes, it still seemed like a cable access show.

Like, why is he throwing a watermelon off a building?

Thats an important consideration for all of us.

And, believe me, maam, youve come to the right place.

Boosler: You dont tune in to "Letterman" to see

whats going on in the country today.

You would have tuned in to Jay to see that.

And thats the big difference ‐‐

comedy of character and personality,

and then a great joke‐teller.

I mean, lets face it. If you dont like who Dave has on,

or you dont like who I have on, now you can click around

and then say, "Well, let me go back to Jay.

Oh, gee, heres something I might have missed."

Charles: I found that they both evolved their style.

They came out of the Carson thing,

and the first instinct

is to kind of sort of do it like that.

And then their personalities emerged,

and they did their own versions of it.

The host plays with the structure.

But you need the structure.

Without it, you dont have comedy.

People like when they know what the rules are.

And then its what you do with those rules.

Sawyer: How do you begin deciding how youre gonna be different?

Well, make no mistake about it. I will be fired from this job.

Its just a matter of how long its gonna take.

I dont know. Really, I dont think

you can invent anything altogether new.

Im sure youve heard Angelina Jolie

filed for divorce from Brad Pitt.

And, of course, all the celebrity gossip magazines

are claiming victory.

You know, they broke this story.

They broke the story every week for the last 11 years...

over and over again. There are just certain things

that I dont think will ever go away.

People are always gonna want to hear jokes

about the news of the day.

Its very ‐‐ This is very exciting for me.

[ Laughter ]

I didnt really watch late‐night television

before I started doing it.

And then I didnt watch it when I was doing it.

I just put things in to entertain myself.

Its a great day for America, everybody!

One of the real problems with broadcast television

is trying to make a show,

you know, which was a "broad cast,"

which was okay for everybody.

Thats seems like ‐‐

That seems almost impossible job.

Hosting "The Tonight Show" has been the fulfillment

of a lifelong dream for me.

And I just want to say to the kids out there watching,

you can do anything you want in life. Yeah.

Yeah, unless Jay Leno wants to do it, too.

[ Laughter ]

Markoe: All of them do some amount of a news segment

just because its already been established.

Its become a way to consume current events.

This jerk left duffel bags on the street,

and two of the bombs were discovered

by thieves snatching bags.

[ Laughter ]

Because as all New Yorkers know,

if you see something, steal something.

Kirkman: Theres seriously too many late‐night shows.

Everyones kind of talking about the same thing,

and youre really just trying to put it

in your hosts voice,

instead of, you know, sounding like everyone else.

Fallon: Of course, I wouldnt be here tonight

if it werent for the previous "Tonight Show" hosts,

so I want to say thank you

to Steve Allen, Jack Paar,

Johnny Carson, Jay Leno, Conan OBrien,

and Jay Leno. Very, very nice.

We are delighted to be back as a regular series.

But to those of you who wrote in that you hated our pilot show...

[Laughing] ...wait till you see this one.

Sacks: "That Was the Week That Was" was the innovator.

That was a show that set forward

you can make the current news funny,

and you can do so in a hip way.

With the candidacy of Senator Barry Goldwater,

the Republican party is on the way back.

And who knows?

One day, it may even go forwards.

The sensibility was more tame in a sense,

more controlled, more dry.

It was witty,

but it wasnt really challenging the power structure.

Our top story tonight...

Our top story, President Ford... ...President Ford is finally

over that stubborn week‐long cold.

...the stubborn week‐long cold!

Markoe: Before "Saturday Night Live," everything was so schmaltzy.

"Saturday Night Live" was the first show that came along

that had a sensibility of people whod grown up on TV.

It was making fun of TV.

Miller: And this idea of satirizing the news, we needed it.

Vietnam was going on.

Wed just been through Watergate.

The idea that we could laugh at the people

who were making the news is a pretty nice formula.

Lets take a look at the top story, shall we?

Anwar Sadat buys himself an inflatable child.

This story and more coming up on "Weekend Update."

"Weekend Update" initially was about irreverence.

It was about a middle finger to the powers that be.

For an on‐the‐spot report,

lets go live to Laraine Newman at the Blaine Hotel.

‐Laraine? ‐Chevy, Im standing...

Newman: "Update" was cathartic for people that saw,

you know, the hypocrisy in the establishment.

I dont think people took "Update" seriously.

It was a relief.

The first man to walk on the moon, Neil Armstrong,

lost a finger when he jumped from a truck

and caught his wedding ring on a barn door

at his suburban Cincinnati home.

While jumping off the truck,

the former astronaut was quoted as saying,

"One small step for man,

a giant ‐‐ Aah!"

[ Screaming ]

‐Jane? ‐It was kind of

a parody of a newscast.

And it was a joke basket.

[ Chuckling ] Thats what it was, you know?

But it became sort of less and less that way.

Charles: It became more personalized as it went on

and much less about a character doing the news.

And by the time it got to Dennis Miller,

it was Dennis Miller. And it wasnt about character.

It was about them speaking their minds.

New Yorks St. Patricks Day parade was held yesterday,

and for the first time in the parades history,

a homosexual contingent marched.

So it is a Gaelic thing.

Now... [ Laughter ]

Every anchor has brought their own personality to it,

so its this thing that is both constant

and constantly changing.

Im Norm Macdonald, and this is the fake news.

Curtin: Times have changed since I first sat behind this desk.

For example, I used to be the only pretty blonde woman

reading the fake news.

Now theres a whole network devoted to that.

Kirkman: News is such a joke in and of itself now

that I can see why things

like "Weekend Update" have survived.

The thought of funny news was what made it so appealing

back when news was serious.

Now that news is entertainment,

youre watching "Weekend Update" for news.

Its probably not great that that transition happened.

It probably should have stayed ‐‐

The news should have kept getting better and better.

But "Weekend Update"

definitely made a transition into the news.

Theres a growing trend among some parents

toward home‐schooling children because they believe

that mandated vaccinations for public schools are unsafe.

This is expected to lead to another new trend,

dying of polio. [ Laughter ]

Charles: They have that opportunity to tap into things

that are happening right this second

and cutting through the bullshit of it

in a way that the regular news cant do.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Miller: "The Daily Show" with Jon Stewart arrives on the scene

when the traditional evening news

is starting to deteriorate.

Let the healing begin. Its headlines.

Black: All of a sudden,

there was what was the beginning of a 24/7 news cycle.

You can take the form now, because everybody is beginning

to understand the form and satirize it.

In 1993, Jordan retired for the first time,

saying hed had enough of the NBA grind

and needed more time with his family.

And after spending more time with his family,

he quickly decided he hadnt had enough of the NBA grind.

Alterman: When Jon took over "The Daily Show,"

it was a much different show.

It was much more driven by pop culture

and parodying broadcasting.

But over time, Jon really

put his laser focus on real issues.

Welcome to our coverage

of the Democratic National Convention from Boston.

Its our first night of coverage.

The convention kicked off last night.

Any network can bring you news as it happens.

But here at "The Daily Show,"

we have taken yesterdays proceedings

and digested it, processed it,

broken it down to give you highly concentrated

what we call turds of wisdom. [ Laughter ]

Bee: The news can be so heavy.

It can be so intense.

Its actually very nice

to have someone analyze things

from a different point of view.

Bell: He became peoples go‐to guy to explain the world.

Youd watch the news, and then youd watch Jon Stewart.

Or you wouldnt watch the news and watch Jon Stewart,

and hed have to remind you, "Im not the news!"

There are a lot of people out there

who do turn to you for ‐‐

Not for news.

Well, they turn ‐‐

For an interpretation,

‐for a comedic interpretation. ‐To be informed.

They actually think that theyre coming closer

to the truth with your...

Now, thats a different thing. Thats credibility.

Lopez: He was able to show you

and make you hear what you wish you would have thought of.

"Oh, man! Why didnt I think of that?"

Or, "Thats hilarious. I never thought of it like that."

Anderson: He grew a stronger and stronger conscience,

then felt a responsibility,

I think, to carry it out.

But he always slammed a huge joke in there.

Nothing will change with the same people,

the same policies that got us into this status quo.

Another Latin word, status quo.

And it stands for, "Man, the middle class,

everyday Americans are really getting taken for a ride."

[ Laughter ]

[ Cheers and applause ]

You know, thats the kind of talk you normally hear

right before the pharmacist says,

"Maam, youve got to leave the Walgreens."

[ Laughter ]

Ferguson: It wasnt really about politics. It was about moral outrage.

Thats what made the show so riveting and fun.

Bullshitters have gotten pretty lazy.

And their work is easily detected.

And looking for it is...

kind of a pleasant way to pass the time,

like an "I‐Spy" of bullshit.

So I say to you tonight, friends,

the best defense against bullshit is vigilance.

Man: Police and fire units are being dispatched

to the scene as we speak.

Man #2: We got a plane crashed into the World Trade Center.

Comedy seems pretty inconsequential

in the face of a grave tragedy.

The whole tone, of course, of the country had changed,

and, naturally, comedy became difficult.

McGraw: There was a time in the days after that

where people didnt know what to do.

The late‐night talk shows didnt know how to behave.

There was almost a moratorium on comedy.

Its terribly sad here in New York City.

Nesteroff: Naturally, the whole tone of these shows had changed,

so there was very little comedy for the next several weeks.

Most of those late‐night shows booked news people

like Brian Williams or Tom Brokaw.

They did not book comedians.

Miller: 9/11 was, obviously,

a dark, dark moment for our country.

But it was an important moment for "SNL."

The words spoken at 11:31 every Saturday night

are "Live from New York." So this was backyard.

So it was almost incumbent upon "Saturday Night Live"

to play some sort of role in the nations healing.

The question is when is it okay to laugh again?

On behalf of everyone here,

I just want to thank you all for being her tonight,

and especially you, Mr. Mayor.

Thank you, Lorne. Thank you very much.

Having our citys institutions up and running

sends a message that New York City is open for business.

"Saturday Night Live" is one of our great

New York City institutions.

And thats why its important for you to do your show tonight.

Can we be funny?

[ Scattered laughter ]

Why start now?

[ Cheers and applause ]

Miller: It was that Saturday night we decided,

"Okay, you know, were gonna be able to do this again."

And they slowly brought us through it.

I think its one of the finest moments in "SNL" history.

Live...

from New York... [ Cheers and applause ]

its Saturday night!

Right after 9/11,

I had to fly to New York

to roast Hugh Hefner for Comedy Central.

And we didnt know what was gonna happen.

The question becomes how do you go about joking again, right?

Youre living in "too soon" territory.

Kimmel: The one and only Gilbert Gottfried.

Gottfried: Tragedy and comedy are roommates.

If you joke about a tragedy,

youre kind of beating the tragedy away.

So I did a joke.

I said, "Today, Ill be using my Muslim name."

"Hasnt bin Laid." [ Laughter ]

Silverman: Theres no black or white answer

to when its time to laugh

and when its time to laugh at.

I wanted to do a joke

that totally is over the line.

And I said, "I have to leave early tonight.

I have to catch a flight to L. A.

I couldnt get a direct flight.

We have to make stop at the Empire State Building."

I lost an audience

as big as anyone in the history of performing.

Somebody said, "Too soon!"

And that didnt slow Gilbert down.

That pushed him to a whole new place.

The father starts fucking his wife.

This sister starts fingering the dogs asshole.

Ross: He started to tell the Aristocrats joke,

which is like comedic jazz.

Its a license to offend just for the fuck of it.

And I remember laughing so hard

that I was sort of crying.

It was just such a release.

And it was just what we needed.

It couldnt have been a better time,

a better place,

or a better person telling it.

If you missed any portion, Ill repeat it.

It absolutely had to be done.

Somebody had to stand up

in front of the comedy community

and say, "Its okay," when its not okay.

But those words must be spoken.

God bless you! [ Applause ]

God bless America!

Kimmel: I thought what Gilbert did that night was heroic,

and I think it ‐‐

Ultimately, you could say whatever you want to say

about whether it was appropriate or not.

It made a lot of people in that room feel very good,

and thats that.

Oswalt: I dont believe in too soon.

You want to know a little secret amongst comedians?

The minute someone says something is off limits,

all we focus on is, "How do I do jokes about that?"

McGraw: One of the most striking choices

in those post‐9/11 days and weeks

was The Onion.

They released an issue

dedicated to the 9/11 attacks.

So, at first, this seems like a terrible, terrible idea.

But when you look at what the writers of The Onion did,

you realize their brilliance.

Litt: They were able to find some sort of common ground,

"What are we all feeling?"

and were able to find humor in that

as opposed to making light of something really terrible.

And it was this amazingly cathartic moment.

Oswalt: Its a beautiful statement about the human species

that eventually, we will make a joke about everything,

because it means that we are defying depression

and loss and death and entropy

to live.

And time will give you the breath to do that.

I like to test myself

by joking about horrible things and nothing but.

One of my favorite ways to test myself,

I like to make jokes about tragedies

the day that they happen.

I dont believe in "too soon."

Im on a tight schedule. [ Laughter ]

Too soons tricky.

Sometimes its too soon,

but not if the jokes good enough.

If the jokes good enough, its never too soon.

Kimmel: Everyone has their own version of that,

but the comedian does not decide.

The audience decides

whether it was acceptable or not.

[ Laughter ]

Another Malaysian Airlines plane was ‐‐

Too soon, Che! Too soon, baby!

My problem is its not too soon,

its I just wish I could think of shit faster.

Jefferies: There is a graph that goes on in my head

that the more offensive the subject,

the funnier it has to be.

Louis: Like, I was thinking the other day

that you can figure out how bad a person you are

by how soon after September 11th you masturbated,

like, how long you waited.

[ Laughter ]

And for me, it was between the two buildings going down.

So I have a feeling that ‐‐ [ Laughter ]

I had to do it. I had to. Otherwise, they win.

Thats the way I was looking at it at the time.

It was a strange time for all of us.

If you giggle, if a guffaw takes place, youre busted,

because something made you have that involuntary reaction.

Apatow: And in a way, life is really hard.

You have to get back to silly at some point,

or life is even harder.

Rock: Boy, that Boston Marathon was scary, man.

That was scary, man. Just think about it.

Youve been training for a year.

You finally get to the finish line,

and somebody screams, "Run!"

[ Laughter ] Oh! That is horrible, man.

For the benefit of all of you who went to sleep last night,

watch this ‐‐ Chris Rock,

arguably one of Americas funniest comedians,

and a former "Saturday Night Live" alumnus

was on last night hosting,

and he did this monologue. Very uncomfortable.

You finally get to the finish line,

and somebody screams, "Run!" [ Laughter ]

Carlson: I got to say, I cant stand it when the Left

is always telling people that their jokes arent funny.

"You shouldnt be allowed to say that."

I dont like political correctness in any of its forms.

Im not saying you shouldnt be allowed to say it.

Not funny at all.

Because the news cycle in the Internet age

demands something fresh and new at all times,

frequently a comedian whos commenting on the news

becomes the news.

He said what?

"30 Rock" star Tracy Morgan

must have rocks in his head.

Maher: Sarah Silverman was on "Conan OBrien," and she told a joke.

It offended certain members of the Asian community.

Duthiers: Trevor Noah went from relative obscurity

to landing one of the most prestigious posts

in late‐night TV.

It didnt take long for his tweets to be condemned.

Kimmel: Everybody thinks you have to be burned at the stake

if youve said something that is deemed to be offensive

by however many thousand people

on Twitter have decided its offensive.

I really think that were at a point in this country

where people really need

to take the thumb out of their mouth

and grow up a little bit and realize

theres a lot bigger problems out there

than what a comedian did a joke about.

I mean, you have to feel the same way about comedy.

Yeah, I do this joke about

the way people need to justify their cellphone.

"I need to have it with me

because people are so important."

‐Right. ‐You know, I said,

"Well, they dont seem very important

the way you scroll through them like a gay French king,"

you know, just... [ Laughter ]

Theres a creepy P. C. thing out there

that really bothers me.

Nair: The rise of this new politically correct trend

is the cover story in the new issue

of The Atlantic magazine.

The protective atmosphere on many campuses

has become so charged

that comedian Jerry Seinfeld wont perform for some students.

Seinfeld: Theyre so P. C. They just want to use these words.

"Thats racist. Thats sexist. Thats prejudiced."

They dont even know what theyre talking about.

Maher: An opinion echoed by Chris Rock.

You know, when Chris Rock, Jerry Seinfeld,

and Larry the Cable Guy

say you have a stick up your ass...

you dont have to wait for the X‐rays to come back.

Ross: People are constantly looking for ways to get offended.

Yeah, I say things that are offensive sometimes.

Im working. Im trying it out.

Too soon for the Celine Dion jokes?

[ Laughter ]

There goes my Michael J. Fox routine.

[ Laughter, groaning ]

Im not making fun of Michael J. Fox.

Thats shaky ground right there.

Apatow: A comedy club is like a gym for comedians.

Its where people experiment.

So its very dangerous to say

that youre not allowed to make a mistake.

Jefferies: The only apology that should ever be made for a joke

is, Im sorry people didnt find it funny,

because maybe you took a swing and a miss.

But you should never apologize for having a go.

They wrote a very nasty article about me

with the headline, "You cannot joke about rape."

Nah.

[ Laughter ]

Turns out you can.

Oswalt: The whole politically correct thing

thats going on right now,

Im happy that its going on, but its nothing new.

Every couple of decades,

there has to be this big, ugly, lets‐take‐it‐all‐apart,

and we see what comes out the other side.

I caught myself a few years ago fighting "gay."

I say "gay." Like, "Thats so gay!" I just say gay.

I have gay friends. I dont mean it like gay.

I mean it like its gay, like its lame.

And then I stop myself and said, "What am I fighting?"

I am ‐‐ I have become the guy from 50 years ago who said,

"I say colored! I have colored friends!"

You have to listen to the college‐aged,

because they lead the revolution.

Theyre pretty much always on the right side of history.

And I think its important... People are so afraid of change.

They fight it so hard.

But if you cant change with the times,

it makes you old, and it makes your comedy stale.

Like, comedy isnt evergreen, unless its poop jokes.

Poop jokes are evergreen, yes.

Its like none for you.

Wong: Its not the topic that stinks. It was your joke that stinks.

If you made them cringe rather than laugh,

then youre doing a bad job.

Im all about Asian men. Theyre the best.

Asian men, no body odor.

They just smell like responsibility.

[ Laughter ]

Charles: This language‐police thing thats going on

has a lot of validity, but also a lot of issues.

Theres a kind of a stirring of the pot,

but we dont know whats gonna settle.

We dont know how the soups gonna taste yet.

McKay: Can there be a case where if you dont use

the right word for a right ethnic group

for a right gender

where people get a little too hyped up about it? Yes.

But those are exactly the waters

that comedy should be traveling.

Oswalt: I will always change.

I will always try to learn the new terms,

but youve got to give me some wiggle room.

And, by the way, I dont know if you know,

if you get hung up on words,

then youre gonna let a lot of evil motherfuckers slip through,

because evil people

learn the correct terms very quickly.

And a lot of times the good guys, eh,

they fuck up a couple of words,

but listen to their heart.

Having constraints makes comedy better in some ways

because it spurs innovation.

Silverman: Sometimes when you have to work around something,

even for a silly reason,

it can make things funnier.

I love that theyre setting this high bar,

because comedy will always find a way over it.

Funny wins.

Louis: Thats the worst thing I ever said.

I think I just finally said

the worst thing I have ever said.

And it feels good.

It feels good to have found the bottom.

You guys were great. Thank you very, very much.

Jefferies: Im gonna talk about something now

that sort of splits a crowd a little bit.

Gun control.

[ Scattered cheers ] Now ‐‐ Wait, wait.

Before you get ‐‐ Dont ‐‐ Dont get excited,

because the other people have guns.

When you bring out a topical subject,

its about timing. Its whether its in the Zeitgeist

and people are gonna latch onto it.

Theres nothing wrong with saying, "I like something.

Dont take it away from me."

But dont give me this other bullshit.

The main one is, "I need it for protection.

I need to protect me. I need to protect my family."

[ Laughter ]

Really? Is that why theyre called assault rifles?

What we do is we like to do funny stuff that creates a stir.

And any time you can see that lead

to some sort of change, you know,

you just kind of keep your mouth shut and walk away.

[ Air horn blows ] Bam!

‐Youre at a gun show! ‐Youre at a gun show.

Social change is a really nice side effect

of being really present

and really brilliantly funny.

Alterman: The best comedy is driven by a point of view.

And a point of view isnt just about their own experience,

but where someone has something to say.

Josh: Now, Im not sure what you heard about me,

but I do things a little different

than yall are used to here at Stuford Heights.

I just need you to go with me on this one.

‐Ohh. ‐No raping?!

‐But, Coach, we play football! ‐My team, my rules.

You dont like it, dont let the door

rape you on the way out.

Ferguson: Good comedians talk about stuff

that bothers them or interests them.

Then you can be passionate about it.

Excuse me a sec. Joe?

Thank you so much.

Thank you. [ Clears throat ]

Partial birth abortions arent a thing!

Thank you so much. [ Cheers and applause ]

We cover, you know, really challenging material,

but its important to bring it back to comedy.

If you for one moment think of yourself

as important, you are dead.

You are out of comedy. Forget it.

The "Ethical and Religious Directives

for Catholic Health Care Services" is a slim volume

of 72 medical commandments

that fit neatly between a patient and her doctor.

Litt: More and more, what youre seeing

are people who care about the world

being unafraid to bring that into their comedy and saying,

"Do I care about the stuff that really matters?

And if I do, then thats fair game for comedy, too."

Boosler: John Olivers come out of the Jon Stewart mold

of just, you know, having a great specific sense of humor.

He does cover a lot of the weeks topics

from his point of view,

and then he turns the show into one topic,

which is kind of great,

because no ones doing long form like that.

Our main topic tonight concerns debt.

I would like to talk to you about drugs.

Our main story tonight is income inequality.

A good way to figure out which side of it youre on

is whether youre currently paying for HBO or stealing it.

More than ever, comedy is a way to hold peoples attention

while you tell them important truths.

Im not saying the IRS is a likeable organization.

But not everything thats important is likeable.

Think of our government as a body.

The IRS is the anus.

Its ‐‐ Its nobodys favorite part,

but you need that thing working properly,

or everything goes to shit real quick!

Key: The comic has become the person who pulls back the curtain

to show the world that,

"Do you see that this is happening?

I ‐‐ We didnt make this up. This wasnt a funny idea we had.

This is whats happening."

The Constitution isnt the Star in "Super Mario Bros."

It doesnt make you invincible

so you can just do whatever the fuck you want.

You teach us about things we should know about.

Its embarrassing, in a way, to have someone come over here

and explain how things like healthcare work.

‐Its less than ideal, so... ‐Yeah.

Silverman: Comedy brings awareness. Its a practice of noticing.

And theres an effect with John Oliver,

because hes actually creating change.

Vanity Fair New Establishment says,

"Oliver has established himself

as perhaps the most disruptive journalist on television."

‐Ugh. ‐So are you aware

of this thing called the John Oliver Effect?

‐Ugh. ‐The John Oliver Effect

is like activism, which is funny in nature

but, at the same time, illuminating issues

that everybody else is missing.

And once theyre illuminated,

theyre very difficult to ignore.

Stephanopoulos: You say you want to make people laugh more than anything else.

But its got to be gratifying

that youve also made people think.

I guess so. I guess so.

That is like a ‐‐ Thats a pleasant byproduct.

But, you know, the main thing were doing is comedy.

So if you get to the end of a joke

and someone is just thinking,

you have failed. [ Chuckles ]

Bee: He probably would hate

that theres something called the John Oliver Effect.

Hes really all about doing a really tight,

well‐researched comedy show.

And beyond that, its out of your control.

39 states hold elections for judges,

and America is virtually alone in doing this.

In fact, theres only one other country on earth

that does it on this scale. You can guess which.

Youre wrong. Its Bolivia,

a country you think about so little,

you havent even realized thats not Bolivia.

This is Bolivia. Actually ‐‐ [ Laughter ]

Actually, thats still not Bolivia.

This is Bolivia. Or is it? Or is it?

The truth goes down a lot easier when a joke is attached to it.

It just does.

It was worth the trip in, wasnt it, just to ‐‐

Charles: So many things that are going on just seem so crazy.

You feel so powerless,

so the comedian that deals with topical issues,

theyre giving people who are voiceless a voice.

Ill be honest with you, its beginning to look like

Im not gonna get "The Tonight Show."

Ross: Whats a comedians take on that election?

Whats that comedians take on that hurricane?

We are speaking...

on behalf of the consumer,

the voter, the victim.

OBrien: The joke, youll forget. Youll forget the joke.

But if its the right moment and the right condition

and you acknowledge what just happened,

its a beautiful thing.

Markoe: The fact that you can take something dark

and make light of it

is one of the few superpowers people have.

Oswalt: You remember when a laugh

steered you back to sanity and comfort.

All of the awful things in the world,

if they can be mocked,

then you can handle it.

Man: So what about the adage

that tragedy plus time equals comedy?

I dont think theres a formula for any of these things.

And so when people contemplate whether something is ‐‐

has it been enough time or is it too soon or not,

again, you cannot generalize.

Theres some topics that you can never talk about

forever.

Youre not allowed to talk about the Holocaust, never!

What do you get when you cross the Atlantic with the Titanic?

Halfway.

Now, if I had said that in 1912,

people would have gone, "Hey!"

Funny is funny, man. It just doesnt matter.

I think I got an AIDS laugh today.

Then theres things like Prince dying.

Eh, three days.

The bar has always been, like, are you funny

or are you not funny?

John Denver dying ‐‐ You could joke about it that afternoon.

People can do the cliches about,

you know, timing and tragedy and all that.

But I think you have to have a level of discomfort.

I dont know if youve seen me with Anderson Cooper,

but I count on his discomfort.

If youre doing a JonBenét routine in Boulder, Colorado...

you better be nailing it.